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OffEFFexor

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But about the tinnitus. What I wouldn't give for some relief from it. It wasn't quite clear to me--do you think Benadryl or sudafed is helping with it?

2009: Cancer hospital said I had adjustment disorder because I thought they were doing it wrong. Their headshrinker prescribed Effexor, and my life set on a new course. I didn't know what was ahead, like a passenger on Disneyland's Matterhorn, smiling and waving as it climbs...clink, clink, clink.

2010: Post surgical accidental Effexor discontinuation by nurses, masked by intravenous Dilaudid. (The car is balanced at the top of the track.) I get home, pop a Vicodin, and ...

Whooosh...down, down, down, down, down...goes the trajectory of my life, up goes my mood and tendency to think everything is a good idea.
2012: After the bipolar jig was up, now a walking bag of unrelated symptoms, I went crazy on Daytrana (the Ritalin skin patch by Noven), because ADHD was a perfect fit for a bag of unrelated symptoms. I was prescribed Effexor for the nervousness of it, and things got neurological. An EEG showed enough activity to warrant an epilepsy diagnosis rather than non-epileptic ("psychogenic") seizures.

:o 2013-2014: Quit everything and got worse. I probably went through DAWS: dopamine agonist withdrawal syndrome. I drank to not feel, but I felt a lot: dread, fear, regret, grief: an utter sense of total loss of everything worth breathing about, for almost two years.

I was not suicidal but I wanted to be dead, at least dead to the experience of my own brain and body.

2015: I  began to recover after adding virgin coconut oil and organic grass-fed fed butter to a cup of instant coffee in the morning.

I did it hoping for mental acuity and better memory. After ten days of that, I was much better, mood-wise. Approximately neutral.

And, I experienced drowsiness. I could sleep. Not exactly happy, I did 30 days on Wellbutrin, because it had done me no harm in the past. 

I don't have the DAWS mood or state of mind. It never feel like doing anything if it means standing up.

In fact, I don't especially like moving. I'm a brain with a beanbag body.   :unsure:

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wc, I've had mild tinnitus most of the years I was taking effexor, so I kinda got used to it.  During acute and chronic withdrawal, the tinnitus became much much worse.  Louder, and different in character, and frequently changing in character.  The benadryl helps a little bit, but it just comes and goes.  Fortunately, when it is most intense and annoying, it usually abates after a couple of hours.

 

My ability to focus on reading a book or a longer piece on computer is a sign of how well or poorly I am doing.  Having a good day today, gonna try and pick up a book and see what happens.

 

btdt, funny I was thinking about how there might be some similarities between the 'acid flashback' and some of what we suffer in WD.  This scent did not feel like a flashback to eating salmon; just the scent w/o any other cognitive or emotional context.  Still could be a 'flashback' type phenomenon, that is an interesting idea.  Otherwise, in WD, I've had plenty of weird old memories pop up, and then kinda get stuck in my mind, repeating over and over for several days like a bad song on the radio gets stuck.  But those have the fuller context of memory.

 

Like I said, today I'm feeling pretty darn good, but at the same time tired of this whole process.  Gonna try and refill the hope and courage tanks today.

1983-1995: On and off several tricyclic ADs
1995: Quit alcohol, started Prozac
2003: Stopped Prozac; 2004: Started Effexor XR 225
2014: Tried and failed three rapid tapers; stopped cold turkey March 11, 2014, eight days of Prozac as a bridge.
March 19, 2014: SSRI/SSNI free; four weeks acute withdrawal, then five month window of minimal symptoms.

Sept 2014-June 2015: Delayed, prolonged severe withdrawal from Effexor. Roller coaster, way up and way down.  Symptoms swing widely. Clear improvement in Mar-Apr, but still much hell. In May symptoms shifted to insomnia and depression, less HA, tinnitus and brain fog.

July-Sept 2015: After two weeks of using CES device, tremendous relief of insomnia, depression and other symptoms. Feeling much better, finally! Symptoms still come and go, good and bad days.Sneaking up on return to good health.  Alto gave me a 'Here Comes the Sun'!!!  ☼

Oct 2015-Feb 2016: Difficult several months, some good days but the bad days felt like I'm moving backwards.  Struggling after steady improvement, but hanging tough.

 

Current supplements:  Mg-Threonate; glutathione; krill oil; borage oil; phosphatidyl choline; multivite, vit B12, vit C, vit D vit E; OTC meds pseudoephedrine in the AM and benadryl at bedtime.  Clonidine 0.2 bid for high blood pressure.

Filled with hope, courage and self-appreciation.

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I smelt cow-poo really strongly in the car driving home from the horse last night.   Sigh - it WAS cow-poo.........  on my shoe :(

Put on Prothiaden for severe depression in 1989.  Recovered.   Prescribed Paxil for another bout of depression around 2000.   Have been trying to taper ever since but always crash about 2 months after getting to zero.   Because of the crashes, for years I thought that there was something wrong with me.   Then found that the crashes were simply withdrawal.   Now following a maximum of a 10% reduction every month or so and ready to slow down any time I feel any symptoms whatsoever.  Feeling good:).

7th Jan 15 - 3.6mg

28th Jan 15 - 3.2mg

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The up and down continues, but I am having longer periods of feeling pretty good, more hours of the day when I feel the brain fog has lifted.  And more good days than bad.  I still have periods of several hours dominated by negative thoughts, anxiety, bad headache and tinnitus.  The suicidal thoughts are very mild and rare over the past week, thank goodness for that.

 

At times my patience is low, as is my hope and courage.  But the last few days I have more of those three qualities.  I've also had glimpses of feeling 'normal' for a couple of hours at a time, thinking clearly and calmly, no symptoms whatsoever.  This gives me hope, while also frustrates me because I know the symptoms will return before too long.  I do feel I have experienced good evidence of healing; particularly the increasing length of the good periods.

 

Knowing I am not alone is a wonderful comfort.  I am heartbroken at how much worse so many other people are suffering, making my struggle seem minor.  I read the site nearly every day, but I don't feel like posting too much. 

1983-1995: On and off several tricyclic ADs
1995: Quit alcohol, started Prozac
2003: Stopped Prozac; 2004: Started Effexor XR 225
2014: Tried and failed three rapid tapers; stopped cold turkey March 11, 2014, eight days of Prozac as a bridge.
March 19, 2014: SSRI/SSNI free; four weeks acute withdrawal, then five month window of minimal symptoms.

Sept 2014-June 2015: Delayed, prolonged severe withdrawal from Effexor. Roller coaster, way up and way down.  Symptoms swing widely. Clear improvement in Mar-Apr, but still much hell. In May symptoms shifted to insomnia and depression, less HA, tinnitus and brain fog.

July-Sept 2015: After two weeks of using CES device, tremendous relief of insomnia, depression and other symptoms. Feeling much better, finally! Symptoms still come and go, good and bad days.Sneaking up on return to good health.  Alto gave me a 'Here Comes the Sun'!!!  ☼

Oct 2015-Feb 2016: Difficult several months, some good days but the bad days felt like I'm moving backwards.  Struggling after steady improvement, but hanging tough.

 

Current supplements:  Mg-Threonate; glutathione; krill oil; borage oil; phosphatidyl choline; multivite, vit B12, vit C, vit D vit E; OTC meds pseudoephedrine in the AM and benadryl at bedtime.  Clonidine 0.2 bid for high blood pressure.

Filled with hope, courage and self-appreciation.

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Good to hear from you OffEff :)

Put on Prothiaden for severe depression in 1989.  Recovered.   Prescribed Paxil for another bout of depression around 2000.   Have been trying to taper ever since but always crash about 2 months after getting to zero.   Because of the crashes, for years I thought that there was something wrong with me.   Then found that the crashes were simply withdrawal.   Now following a maximum of a 10% reduction every month or so and ready to slow down any time I feel any symptoms whatsoever.  Feeling good:).

7th Jan 15 - 3.6mg

28th Jan 15 - 3.2mg

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I saw the deliciousness of life quote, and I too loved it.

 

My saving grace, what has made my WD tolerable, is although I have had some moments of horrible depressive despair, they have not lasted more than an hour or two. When I suffered my first major depressive episode, in my 20s, I would wallow in those depths for weeks at a time. This WD has been difficult, but nothing like that horrible black hole of hopelessness.

 

I have such sadness and empathy for you, and for everyone who has suffered like this. I am grateful that despite how much my path has sucked in recent weeks, even including a little suicidal ideation, it could be so much worse; and it is so much worse for so many people.

 

You've said plenty, cw. thanks.

January 2012 - Prescribed 900mg gabapentin and 30mg Norco for lower lumber spinal stenosis pain.

September 2013 - Spinal fusion surgery, 6 levels. Hospital ramped up meds 1500mg gabapentin, 100mg Norco, 80mg Oxycontin, 25mg Fentanyl patch.

January 2014 - Sever nausea daily and with back pain every 4 hours. 2 trips to ER. First endoscopy found ulcer. Treated with Sucralfate and PPI. Second endo in May found no ulcers. Doctors said it was the opiates causing the nausea. CT'd Oxycontin, Fentanyl patch.

July 2014 - Lost 48 lbs. due to not eating because of severe nausea. GP prescribed Prozac 20mg and Ativan 2mg prn. Tried for 4 days, quit. Two week followup GP said keep taking Prozac. 4 days, quit again. Ativan taken rarely prn for anxiety and appetite.

August 2014 - Went to detox. Off opiates. Still nauseous, helmet head, drugged feeling. Doctor CT'd gabapentin. Ended up in ER. Found 2 gallstones. Gabapentin reinstated at 900mg. Tried botched up and down taper to get off Gabapentin. No tapering advice from doctor. Said to just CT again.

September 2014 - Coded on table during gallbladder surgery. Developed liver biloma due to CPR by doctor. Had bile bulb inserted for 2 wks to drain.

October 2014 - Gallbladder removed. Still nauseous, 3am cortisol surging, drugged helmet head, vertigo, breathlessness, whooshing head, heart palps.

November 8th, 2014 - CT'd gabapentin suggested by family and 4 different doctors. Was told no withdrawal is associated with gabapentin. Have been in hell ever since. No windows, just one big tsunami every day with same symptoms for 4 months.

December 26, 2014 - Found SA. At least I know I'm not insane. My family thinks I'm doing this to myself. Akathesia has become unbearable.

March 10, 2015 - In absolute daily hell with no relief. Currently taking magnesium 200mg before bedtime.

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Reading your thread is like sitting on the sofa talking to a buddy. So easy-going, relaxed, no big deal attitude. Even though you're suffering right now, you have the objectivity and compassion for others who are worse off than you. Very pragmatic and wise. I shall call you Yoda. Thanks for this relaxing read. You have no idea how much I needed it.

January 2012 - Prescribed 900mg gabapentin and 30mg Norco for lower lumber spinal stenosis pain.

September 2013 - Spinal fusion surgery, 6 levels. Hospital ramped up meds 1500mg gabapentin, 100mg Norco, 80mg Oxycontin, 25mg Fentanyl patch.

January 2014 - Sever nausea daily and with back pain every 4 hours. 2 trips to ER. First endoscopy found ulcer. Treated with Sucralfate and PPI. Second endo in May found no ulcers. Doctors said it was the opiates causing the nausea. CT'd Oxycontin, Fentanyl patch.

July 2014 - Lost 48 lbs. due to not eating because of severe nausea. GP prescribed Prozac 20mg and Ativan 2mg prn. Tried for 4 days, quit. Two week followup GP said keep taking Prozac. 4 days, quit again. Ativan taken rarely prn for anxiety and appetite.

August 2014 - Went to detox. Off opiates. Still nauseous, helmet head, drugged feeling. Doctor CT'd gabapentin. Ended up in ER. Found 2 gallstones. Gabapentin reinstated at 900mg. Tried botched up and down taper to get off Gabapentin. No tapering advice from doctor. Said to just CT again.

September 2014 - Coded on table during gallbladder surgery. Developed liver biloma due to CPR by doctor. Had bile bulb inserted for 2 wks to drain.

October 2014 - Gallbladder removed. Still nauseous, 3am cortisol surging, drugged helmet head, vertigo, breathlessness, whooshing head, heart palps.

November 8th, 2014 - CT'd gabapentin suggested by family and 4 different doctors. Was told no withdrawal is associated with gabapentin. Have been in hell ever since. No windows, just one big tsunami every day with same symptoms for 4 months.

December 26, 2014 - Found SA. At least I know I'm not insane. My family thinks I'm doing this to myself. Akathesia has become unbearable.

March 10, 2015 - In absolute daily hell with no relief. Currently taking magnesium 200mg before bedtime.

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Thanks for updating, even though you don't much feel like it.  I was interested to read about your experience of phantom smells.  I've had that very briefly a few times, but nothing which has bothered me, its been a bit of a novelty really.  But one member, Lexicon, was bothered by unpleasant phantom smells for a few months and she found it quite disturbing, but it went away eventually.

I'm not a doctor.  My comments are not medical advise. These are my opinions based on my own experience and what I've learned. Please discuss your situation with a medical practitioner who has knowledge of tapering and withdrawal...if you are lucky enough to find one.

My Introduction Thread

Full Drug and Withdrawal History

Brief Summary

Several SSRIs for 13 years starting 1997 (for mild to moderate partly situational anxiety) Xanax PRN ~ Various other drugs over the years for side effects

2 month 'taper' off Lexapro 2010

Short acute withdrawal, followed by 2 -3 months of improvement then delayed protracted withdrawal

DX ADHD followed by several years of stimulants and other drugs trying to manage increasing symptoms

Failed reinstatement of Lexapro and trial of Prozac (became suicidal)

May 2013 Found SA, learned about withdrawal, stopped taking drugs...healing begins.

Protracted withdrawal, with a very sensitized nervous system, slowly recovering as time passes

Supplements which have helped: Vitamin C, Magnesium, Taurine

Bad reactions: Many supplements but mostly fish oil and Vitamin D

June 2016 - Started daily juicing, mostly vegetables and lots of greens.

Aug 2016 - Oct 2016 Best window ever, felt almost completely recovered

Oct 2016 -Symptoms returned - bad days and less bad days.

April 2018 - No windows, but significant improvement, it feels like permanent full recovery is close.

VIDEO: Where did the chemical imbalance theory come from?



VIDEO: How are psychiatric diagnoses made?



VIDEO: Why do psychiatric drugs have withdrawal syndromes?



VIDEO: Can psychiatric drugs cause long-lasting negative effects?

VIDEO: Dr. Claire Weekes

 

 

 

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  • 2 weeks later...

I had a sense of improvement until I was slammed by a couple of very bad days this week.  Two of the worst days I can recall, last Saturday, then again on Wednesday, then Thursday evening I also felt pretty bad, more depressed feelings and crying layered upon the headache, tinnitus, foggy brain, anxiety over money and job problems and general uneasiness.  Also a strong frustration with this withdrawal process, which has left me barely functioning for going on five months now, and a fatigue that I just can't go on much longer.  Real powerful suckiness.  Last night the headache was particularly bad, as bad as I can recall during this withdrawal. 

 

Then, I wake up this morning, after some good solid sleep, and I felt as close to healthy and normal as I can remember for months.  My mind felt 100% clear and functional.  This persisted most of the day, and it is so bizarre, considering how crappy I felt earlier in the week and even just last night.  In the afternoon some mild and very tolerable symptoms popped up, but not lasting more than an hour.  This several hours of feeling normal was strangely disorienting.  It felt foreign, plus I've come to expect that such relief will not last more than a few hours.  OTOH, if I can get back to the way I felt this morning, I will be very happy. 

 

This is such a roller coaster.  Up, down, over and over again. 

 

I've read here that this healing process is not linear, and my path sure doesn't feel like any kind of straight line.  I am hopeful that somehow these bad days and worsening symptoms are signs of healing and repair, and that they presage improvement, the old 'darkest before the dawn' cliche.  I sure hope so.  I am really sick and tired of this stuff.

 

I tried a mindfulness meditation youtube yesterday, it is a different style of meditation than what I do (although I am not regular in my meditation, I haven't gotten into the habit of doing it daily) and it felt pretty good.  It was mentioned on a thread here, I don't remember which thread.  I'm going to try this daily, and to read a bit more about it.  The first description of the meditative technique starts at about the 13:00 mark. 

1983-1995: On and off several tricyclic ADs
1995: Quit alcohol, started Prozac
2003: Stopped Prozac; 2004: Started Effexor XR 225
2014: Tried and failed three rapid tapers; stopped cold turkey March 11, 2014, eight days of Prozac as a bridge.
March 19, 2014: SSRI/SSNI free; four weeks acute withdrawal, then five month window of minimal symptoms.

Sept 2014-June 2015: Delayed, prolonged severe withdrawal from Effexor. Roller coaster, way up and way down.  Symptoms swing widely. Clear improvement in Mar-Apr, but still much hell. In May symptoms shifted to insomnia and depression, less HA, tinnitus and brain fog.

July-Sept 2015: After two weeks of using CES device, tremendous relief of insomnia, depression and other symptoms. Feeling much better, finally! Symptoms still come and go, good and bad days.Sneaking up on return to good health.  Alto gave me a 'Here Comes the Sun'!!!  ☼

Oct 2015-Feb 2016: Difficult several months, some good days but the bad days felt like I'm moving backwards.  Struggling after steady improvement, but hanging tough.

 

Current supplements:  Mg-Threonate; glutathione; krill oil; borage oil; phosphatidyl choline; multivite, vit B12, vit C, vit D vit E; OTC meds pseudoephedrine in the AM and benadryl at bedtime.  Clonidine 0.2 bid for high blood pressure.

Filled with hope, courage and self-appreciation.

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up and down, round and round.   I could be 3 totally different people all in one day. lolol.  We'll get there OffEff!

Put on Prothiaden for severe depression in 1989.  Recovered.   Prescribed Paxil for another bout of depression around 2000.   Have been trying to taper ever since but always crash about 2 months after getting to zero.   Because of the crashes, for years I thought that there was something wrong with me.   Then found that the crashes were simply withdrawal.   Now following a maximum of a 10% reduction every month or so and ready to slow down any time I feel any symptoms whatsoever.  Feeling good:).

7th Jan 15 - 3.6mg

28th Jan 15 - 3.2mg

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I've had some very bad days this week.  I hate posting when I am in the middle of a wave of pain and symptoms, just as I hate calling one of my friends to complain when I am feeling down.  But I should, so I will try to.

 

The depressed moods I have had during the past five months have been relatively mild and short lived.  In the past three weeks that has changed; when my mood is low it has been lower than before.  The sadness has been more intense, and it hangs around longer, for 12-24 hours at a time.  I had one bad day about three weeks ago, but it was isolated.  The last week I've had three or four bad days wrt depression, featuring lots of crying and lots of suicidal thinking. 

 

Some external stresses are contributing.  I have been working only a couple of hours a week, I have not been able to handle searching for more work much less doing some, and I'm in a big financial hole  (I'm not totally broke yet but I'm getting there.) Some significant tax issues are plaguing me as well. Plus, my sister is having some trouble, and I am limited in how much I can help her.  I keep waiting for a window to emerge, because once I find work and start on a new job, I'll be making good money immediately and my only significant external stressor will be immediately alleviated. 

 

A couple of specific stresses along these lines hit me this week, worsening my mood and maybe even other symptoms.  In addition to feeling more depressed more often, the headache, tinnitus and fatigue are much more severe at times this week.  This morning my mood and outlook was not horrible (not great either, but I wasn't crying and wishing for death) but the HA and ear ringing was at its maximum, for about three hours.

 

The saving grace has been I do get pauses of several hours at a time when my mood lifts, and when the HA/tinnitus weakens.  But generally I feel like a wreck.  Hope is giving way to despair, courage to fear, and self-appreciation is yielding to self-loathing.  This sucks.  Part of the suck is saying so outloud to my internet friends, and real-life friends and family.  I appreciate so very much that this forum is here, and that all of you are here. 

1983-1995: On and off several tricyclic ADs
1995: Quit alcohol, started Prozac
2003: Stopped Prozac; 2004: Started Effexor XR 225
2014: Tried and failed three rapid tapers; stopped cold turkey March 11, 2014, eight days of Prozac as a bridge.
March 19, 2014: SSRI/SSNI free; four weeks acute withdrawal, then five month window of minimal symptoms.

Sept 2014-June 2015: Delayed, prolonged severe withdrawal from Effexor. Roller coaster, way up and way down.  Symptoms swing widely. Clear improvement in Mar-Apr, but still much hell. In May symptoms shifted to insomnia and depression, less HA, tinnitus and brain fog.

July-Sept 2015: After two weeks of using CES device, tremendous relief of insomnia, depression and other symptoms. Feeling much better, finally! Symptoms still come and go, good and bad days.Sneaking up on return to good health.  Alto gave me a 'Here Comes the Sun'!!!  ☼

Oct 2015-Feb 2016: Difficult several months, some good days but the bad days felt like I'm moving backwards.  Struggling after steady improvement, but hanging tough.

 

Current supplements:  Mg-Threonate; glutathione; krill oil; borage oil; phosphatidyl choline; multivite, vit B12, vit C, vit D vit E; OTC meds pseudoephedrine in the AM and benadryl at bedtime.  Clonidine 0.2 bid for high blood pressure.

Filled with hope, courage and self-appreciation.

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Hi 

I know how you feel and what you are going through.  I really feel for you.  Having physical and mental dysfunction makes me desperate.  It is tough.  Don't feel bad to post your suffering.  We are here to listen and help.  

 

You were posting about your doctor before.  What is he doing or telling you to do?   

 

I wish tomorrow is a better day for us. 

2004 Sept paxil 

2005 July I quit Paxil(CT) Sept., acute WD/relapse then reinstated Paxil.  In 5 days felt better.

2006 March quit Paxil (CT) again then April acute WD/relapse reinstated Paxil.  In 5 days felt better.   

2010 Oct. I had the same episode above 

2011, I had a breast cancer (stage 1) and doctor changed Paxil to Effexor 37.5 mg.  (she said effexor works for hot flushes and it's better for me)

2012 in May, Effexor dose was increased to 75 mg because it wasn't working much for my hot flushes.  

2014 in May, I changed back to 37.5 mg.  Because of few of the side effects I did not like.

My breast cancer is now all cleared. 

2012-2014 I was quitting effexor every 3 months without knowing the harmful consequences. no WD until 2014 Aug. 

2014 2014 Aug 25 after 1.5 months of off Effexor, WD reinstated 75mg for 10 days and got adverse reaction then Finally found this forum 
2014 Sept 1 reduced the dose to 37.5 
2014 Sept 20 took antibiotics (amoxillin) for tooth implant which led me to terrible WDS again  
         Oct 13 started to taper;  took 4 beads out of 38.  had one great week and Oct 21, after flu shot, acute WD
 I realized each cap has a different number of beads.  Started to count 34 beads. Waves and Windows in 2 weeks interval.   
2014 Dec. 28 Started Prozac bridge with my psychiatrist's instruction.  Added Prozac 5mg
2015 Jan 07 started to taper Effexor 5 beads everyday  
2015 Jan 13 Effexpr 0 beads +Prozac 1.25 ml (5 mg) +Klonopin 0.25 mg at night: since tapering off Effexor, feeling great, much less tinnitus and tingling pain 
2015 Jan 22 increased Prozac to 10 mg due to the depression.
supplement: fish oil 2400 multi Vt. Jan 8 changed to EPA 1200 + DHA 600 
 
 
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Hi:

 

I'm another refugee from the other web site that shut down today (December 17, 2014.) On Prozac then Effexor XR for almost 20 years, quit cold turkey nine months ago, roller coaster since but doing OK and gradually getting better.

 

I've lurked on this site for a couple of months, and what I have read and learned here has been invaluable. When the first wave of prolonged symptoms hit me, I didn't know what was happening to me; stories and posts here helped me figure it out.

 

Here's my story.

 

I’m a 57yo man, who took Effexor XR 225 mg (venlafaxine) every day for a little over ten years. Previously I had taken Prozac for about eight years, and prior to that I had been on and off tricyclic ADs for over a decade to treat depression. I have been off Effexor since mid March of this year. Someone called these little capsules ‘the Devil’s Tic-Tacs’. Perfect description. I have had a rough time with prolonged withdrawal, up and down, but overall things are getting better.

 

I suffered a major depressive episode w/strong suicidal ideation during graduate school. (I am a doctor, my specialty is not psychiatry.) The meds helped the depression, and the side effects were tolerable. Nearly 20 years ago I recognized that I am an alcoholic, and I quit drinking. At that time a doctor started me on Prozac; I was pretty depressed as I headed for alcohol rehab.

 

The Prozac seemed to burn out after about four years, I was getting depressed on it. My depression seemed to have a seasonal aspect, more likely to hit in the winter. I tried discontinuing the Prozac cold turkey (under care of a psychiatrist), but after several months I felt depressed and he prescribed Effexor. I’d taken 225mg of the XR formulation for fourteen years.

 

Credit where due; my depression was severe at times, and Effexor was of great benefit for me. The entire decade and a half on the drug I was never suicidal, I never approached the depths of despair I had previously experienced with depression. Effexor clearly put a floor on my emotions, below which I never fell.

 

At the start of 2014, I though of weaning off the Effexor. I had been off alcohol for nearly two decades; I had drastically improved my diet about two years prior, I had been eating a healthy, natural diet. For years I had practiced Cognitive Behavioral Therapy to keep depression at bay. I had not been severely depressed for many years, I thought I would try weaning from Effexor.

 

From Jan to March 2014, I attempted three times to wean. I encountered symptoms each time I decreased the dose; I reinstated and tried again with a smaller decrease. This was under the care and supervision of my long-time psychiatrist. However, the withdrawal symptoms were quite annoying, and they did not subside when I returned to the full dose the final try (I had decreased by only 3.5% for three weeks.) I now know the weaning schedules I tried were way too fast, but I did not know this at the time.

 

It was the severity of symptoms that I experienced in these weaning attempts that convinced me that I wanted off this drug. Initially I did not feel very strongly about stopping the med. But the process of stopping had such powerful effects on me, that is what convinced me to commit to quitting the drug.

 

So, I decided to stop full. Cold-friggin’ turkey. I took Prozac as a bridge for eight days, but I stopped that because I thought it was making me nauseated, and the nausea stopped with stopping the Prozac. Look, I know now what a horrible idea this was, but I didn’t know then. And my doc didn’t know. I figured a few weeks of agony would be worth getting this stuff out of my system. I had no idea the risks involved with not doing a slow taper. I had no frigging idea. Big mistake.

 

For five days I was a wreck, but over the next several days, the WD symptoms subsided. Pretty steadily and rapidly. After a month, the symptoms were minimal, and frankly I felt great.

 

Over the next five months, I was fine. Better than I felt the last few years on the medication—a fuller range of emotion, a clearer mind. Only looking back did I realize that the last few years on Effexor I had generally experienced suppression of the upper range of emotions. My highs were lower. Much lower. I didn’t notice while I was on the drug, but within a few days off, despite the pain of acute withdrawal, I realized I had been missing those highs. Even with the heavy acute symptoms, within a few days I felt my brain working better off Effexor than during the last few years on the drug.

 

While on Effexor I never had any feeling that I had lost my ‘old self’. But within a few days after stopping I sensed that my ‘old self’ was returning. Only looking back did I realize how much my old self had faded in the last few years on Effexor. I thought I was just getting older, and losing some motivation and some of the sense of excitement of life. It is difficult to clearly describe, but within the first few weeks I felt a subtle but distinct change in attitude, a clear improvement in my mental and emotional functioning. Man, over the past spring and summer I felt better than I had in years, despite going through some difficult life stuff (a close cousin passed through an ugly terminal illness and death, and I suffered a big career disappointment.) After the acute withdrawal symptoms faded over the first four weeks CT, I felt really good. And I thought a few days of agony, a few weeks of discomfort was a fair price to pay to get Effexor out of my nervous system and my life.

 

Then, six months after the CT, it hit. Mid September of this year. First I felt a little depressed mood creeping in. Then, ringing in the ears and headache. Then, all kinds of stuff. Mood swings. Tearfulness and crying. Suicidal thoughts. Weird dreams. Depersonalization and derealization (DP/DR). Physical fatigue. Mental fog and fatigue. And rapid switching from one symptom to the next. I can wake up feeling pretty normal and it can last for 3-4 hours. Then, the predominant symptom of the day will start to kick in, maybe crying, maybe a feeling I’ll never be free of this stuff, maybe just really loud tinnitus, and last for a few hours. Then back to feeling pretty good, thinking clearly but with the headache persisting. Other days the worst part of the day will be the morning; some days I sleep 18 hours, other nights I can’t sleep more than two or three hours at a time. Like someone is spinning a wheel to see what symptom or which combo will hit me on a given day. This stuff has gone on for about three months, peaking maybe about a month ago, gradually getting better for a month, then two bad weeks, and the last three days a bit better.

 

I was well aware of, from reading online and talking with my shrink, the acute withdrawal syndrome of this stupid medication. I did not discover the long-term withdrawal syndrome until I was well into it this past fall, and this message board/community has been one of my best sources of information as well as support. My shrink is on the faculty of a major medical school, although his specialty is addiction/recovery, despite plenty of experience prescribing these drugs he was clueless about the acute and prolonged withdrawal syndromes. He sought advice about my acute withdrawal from his peers, and the lack of awareness is stupefying. Thank goodness my doc has an open mind and he is willing to admit out loud when he is wrong or when he doesn’t know something. I’m sure it helps that I am also a doctor, I don’t know how different it would be if I was a civilian, but I don’t mean to knock him because of his cluelessness.

 

So, that’s my story. Almost nine months since CT stop. It could’ve been worse. It is getting better. But man, this sucks.

 

Summary:

On and off several tricyclic ADs starting at age 25 (amitriptyline, imipramine, nortriptyline) for depression.

Quit alcohol and other drugs age 37; started Prozac, for about eight years.

Stopped Prozac for six months; started Effexor XR age 47.

Took Effexor XR 225mg for ten years

Now age 57, attempted weaning January 2014 three times, shortly returned to full dose due to withdrawal effects.

CT March 11, 2014, eight days of Prozac as a bridge. Five days of horrible WD symptoms, then gradually receded over three weeks.

Nearly six months doing very well, then WD symptoms/wave reappeared mid Sept. 2014

Dec. 2014 WD symptoms gradually decreasing as a three month long wave of symptoms subsides.

I started Lexapro 2013 30? mg

Changed to Effexor 75 mg Jan 2014

Started tapering. 1st Dec 2014 -

75mg down to 37.5 in 1st month.

18.7 mg to 9 mg between 1st jan- 1st feb.

Discontinued 1st Feb- 27th Feb

Have experienced, daily, vertigo, disassociation, chronic fatigue, insomnia,

Pins and needles down right side head and intense despair.

Reinstated 4 beads Effexor 28th Feb 15'

Side affects of withdrawal not manageable particularly

Depression/dispair.

Link to comment

Hi 

I know how you feel and what you are going through.  I really feel for you.  Having physical and mental dysfunction makes me desperate.  It is tough.  Don't feel bad to post your suffering.  We are here to listen and help.  

 

You were posting about your doctor before.  What is he doing or telling you to do?   

 

I wish tomorrow is a better day for us. 

Thanks, much appreciated.

 

My doc has suggested I get a consultation with another psychiatrist who is known for alternative treatments and for problem/difficult cases, see if this second doc has any ideas.  He also would like to see me on a medication if the suicide thoughts persist or get worse.  He has mentioned depakote and lithium, but he hasn't outright recommended or prescribed anything.  He knows I am extremely reluctant to take any psychoactive medication at this time. 

1983-1995: On and off several tricyclic ADs
1995: Quit alcohol, started Prozac
2003: Stopped Prozac; 2004: Started Effexor XR 225
2014: Tried and failed three rapid tapers; stopped cold turkey March 11, 2014, eight days of Prozac as a bridge.
March 19, 2014: SSRI/SSNI free; four weeks acute withdrawal, then five month window of minimal symptoms.

Sept 2014-June 2015: Delayed, prolonged severe withdrawal from Effexor. Roller coaster, way up and way down.  Symptoms swing widely. Clear improvement in Mar-Apr, but still much hell. In May symptoms shifted to insomnia and depression, less HA, tinnitus and brain fog.

July-Sept 2015: After two weeks of using CES device, tremendous relief of insomnia, depression and other symptoms. Feeling much better, finally! Symptoms still come and go, good and bad days.Sneaking up on return to good health.  Alto gave me a 'Here Comes the Sun'!!!  ☼

Oct 2015-Feb 2016: Difficult several months, some good days but the bad days felt like I'm moving backwards.  Struggling after steady improvement, but hanging tough.

 

Current supplements:  Mg-Threonate; glutathione; krill oil; borage oil; phosphatidyl choline; multivite, vit B12, vit C, vit D vit E; OTC meds pseudoephedrine in the AM and benadryl at bedtime.  Clonidine 0.2 bid for high blood pressure.

Filled with hope, courage and self-appreciation.

Link to comment

Welcome! I empathise with your story. I am female of the species in Australia, who's symptoms mirror yours. Though, I was only on Effexor for one year, I am struggling with the unpredictability of the symptoms you described, and I am sure I exacerbated them with the thought they may be permanent.

 

I have to believe my ability to heal myself is more powerful than the poison to which I've been subjected.

I came across video/audio 'Calming and Acceptance Exercise', in the Symptom and Care section of this site. I urge you to check it out.

Getting in my own way , of my healing with anxiety around the severity of the symptoms, I believe hinders the healing process

Yours had been quite a journey, a very protracted one, my heart goes out to you.

 

I wish you well <> Sujema

I started Lexapro 2013 30? mg

Changed to Effexor 75 mg Jan 2014

Started tapering. 1st Dec 2014 -

75mg down to 37.5 in 1st month.

18.7 mg to 9 mg between 1st jan- 1st feb.

Discontinued 1st Feb- 27th Feb

Have experienced, daily, vertigo, disassociation, chronic fatigue, insomnia,

Pins and needles down right side head and intense despair.

Reinstated 4 beads Effexor 28th Feb 15'

Side affects of withdrawal not manageable particularly

Depression/dispair.

Link to comment

Hi OffEffexor! What lingering symptoms are still hanging onto you?

January 2012 - Prescribed 900mg gabapentin and 30mg Norco for lower lumber spinal stenosis pain.

September 2013 - Spinal fusion surgery, 6 levels. Hospital ramped up meds 1500mg gabapentin, 100mg Norco, 80mg Oxycontin, 25mg Fentanyl patch.

January 2014 - Sever nausea daily and with back pain every 4 hours. 2 trips to ER. First endoscopy found ulcer. Treated with Sucralfate and PPI. Second endo in May found no ulcers. Doctors said it was the opiates causing the nausea. CT'd Oxycontin, Fentanyl patch.

July 2014 - Lost 48 lbs. due to not eating because of severe nausea. GP prescribed Prozac 20mg and Ativan 2mg prn. Tried for 4 days, quit. Two week followup GP said keep taking Prozac. 4 days, quit again. Ativan taken rarely prn for anxiety and appetite.

August 2014 - Went to detox. Off opiates. Still nauseous, helmet head, drugged feeling. Doctor CT'd gabapentin. Ended up in ER. Found 2 gallstones. Gabapentin reinstated at 900mg. Tried botched up and down taper to get off Gabapentin. No tapering advice from doctor. Said to just CT again.

September 2014 - Coded on table during gallbladder surgery. Developed liver biloma due to CPR by doctor. Had bile bulb inserted for 2 wks to drain.

October 2014 - Gallbladder removed. Still nauseous, 3am cortisol surging, drugged helmet head, vertigo, breathlessness, whooshing head, heart palps.

November 8th, 2014 - CT'd gabapentin suggested by family and 4 different doctors. Was told no withdrawal is associated with gabapentin. Have been in hell ever since. No windows, just one big tsunami every day with same symptoms for 4 months.

December 26, 2014 - Found SA. At least I know I'm not insane. My family thinks I'm doing this to myself. Akathesia has become unbearable.

March 10, 2015 - In absolute daily hell with no relief. Currently taking magnesium 200mg before bedtime.

Link to comment

I'm 96 days off gabapentin (no meds or supplements either). Just hunkering down in the foxhole here, waiting for the bombs to stop exploding around me.

January 2012 - Prescribed 900mg gabapentin and 30mg Norco for lower lumber spinal stenosis pain.

September 2013 - Spinal fusion surgery, 6 levels. Hospital ramped up meds 1500mg gabapentin, 100mg Norco, 80mg Oxycontin, 25mg Fentanyl patch.

January 2014 - Sever nausea daily and with back pain every 4 hours. 2 trips to ER. First endoscopy found ulcer. Treated with Sucralfate and PPI. Second endo in May found no ulcers. Doctors said it was the opiates causing the nausea. CT'd Oxycontin, Fentanyl patch.

July 2014 - Lost 48 lbs. due to not eating because of severe nausea. GP prescribed Prozac 20mg and Ativan 2mg prn. Tried for 4 days, quit. Two week followup GP said keep taking Prozac. 4 days, quit again. Ativan taken rarely prn for anxiety and appetite.

August 2014 - Went to detox. Off opiates. Still nauseous, helmet head, drugged feeling. Doctor CT'd gabapentin. Ended up in ER. Found 2 gallstones. Gabapentin reinstated at 900mg. Tried botched up and down taper to get off Gabapentin. No tapering advice from doctor. Said to just CT again.

September 2014 - Coded on table during gallbladder surgery. Developed liver biloma due to CPR by doctor. Had bile bulb inserted for 2 wks to drain.

October 2014 - Gallbladder removed. Still nauseous, 3am cortisol surging, drugged helmet head, vertigo, breathlessness, whooshing head, heart palps.

November 8th, 2014 - CT'd gabapentin suggested by family and 4 different doctors. Was told no withdrawal is associated with gabapentin. Have been in hell ever since. No windows, just one big tsunami every day with same symptoms for 4 months.

December 26, 2014 - Found SA. At least I know I'm not insane. My family thinks I'm doing this to myself. Akathesia has become unbearable.

March 10, 2015 - In absolute daily hell with no relief. Currently taking magnesium 200mg before bedtime.

Link to comment

Hope you find some relief today.

January 2012 - Prescribed 900mg gabapentin and 30mg Norco for lower lumber spinal stenosis pain.

September 2013 - Spinal fusion surgery, 6 levels. Hospital ramped up meds 1500mg gabapentin, 100mg Norco, 80mg Oxycontin, 25mg Fentanyl patch.

January 2014 - Sever nausea daily and with back pain every 4 hours. 2 trips to ER. First endoscopy found ulcer. Treated with Sucralfate and PPI. Second endo in May found no ulcers. Doctors said it was the opiates causing the nausea. CT'd Oxycontin, Fentanyl patch.

July 2014 - Lost 48 lbs. due to not eating because of severe nausea. GP prescribed Prozac 20mg and Ativan 2mg prn. Tried for 4 days, quit. Two week followup GP said keep taking Prozac. 4 days, quit again. Ativan taken rarely prn for anxiety and appetite.

August 2014 - Went to detox. Off opiates. Still nauseous, helmet head, drugged feeling. Doctor CT'd gabapentin. Ended up in ER. Found 2 gallstones. Gabapentin reinstated at 900mg. Tried botched up and down taper to get off Gabapentin. No tapering advice from doctor. Said to just CT again.

September 2014 - Coded on table during gallbladder surgery. Developed liver biloma due to CPR by doctor. Had bile bulb inserted for 2 wks to drain.

October 2014 - Gallbladder removed. Still nauseous, 3am cortisol surging, drugged helmet head, vertigo, breathlessness, whooshing head, heart palps.

November 8th, 2014 - CT'd gabapentin suggested by family and 4 different doctors. Was told no withdrawal is associated with gabapentin. Have been in hell ever since. No windows, just one big tsunami every day with same symptoms for 4 months.

December 26, 2014 - Found SA. At least I know I'm not insane. My family thinks I'm doing this to myself. Akathesia has become unbearable.

March 10, 2015 - In absolute daily hell with no relief. Currently taking magnesium 200mg before bedtime.

Link to comment

I came across video/audio 'Calming and Acceptance Exercise', in the Symptom and Care section of this site. I urge you to check it out.

Getting in my own way , of my healing with anxiety around the severity of the symptoms, I believe hinders the healing process

Yours had been quite a journey, a very protracted one, my heart goes out to you.

 

 

Thanks, Sujema.  I will check out that vid.

 

 

Hi OffEffexor! What lingering symptoms are still hanging onto you?

 

Headache; loud ringing in the ears; fatigue and low energy; depressed mood with lots of crying and suicidal thoughts; difficulty sleeping more than an hour or two (my sleep generally has been good since September.)  Those are the main ones, they come and go with varying intensity during the day and night with no discernible pattern.  But the worst symptom or combination will rarely last more than a couple of hours.  In the last couple of weeks the depressed mood has been staying around for 4-8 hours at a time, but it does let up before too much time has passed.  The rapid starting and stopping of the symptoms is so strange.  Thanks for asking, Pug; I hope you and everyone else finds relief and good days.

1983-1995: On and off several tricyclic ADs
1995: Quit alcohol, started Prozac
2003: Stopped Prozac; 2004: Started Effexor XR 225
2014: Tried and failed three rapid tapers; stopped cold turkey March 11, 2014, eight days of Prozac as a bridge.
March 19, 2014: SSRI/SSNI free; four weeks acute withdrawal, then five month window of minimal symptoms.

Sept 2014-June 2015: Delayed, prolonged severe withdrawal from Effexor. Roller coaster, way up and way down.  Symptoms swing widely. Clear improvement in Mar-Apr, but still much hell. In May symptoms shifted to insomnia and depression, less HA, tinnitus and brain fog.

July-Sept 2015: After two weeks of using CES device, tremendous relief of insomnia, depression and other symptoms. Feeling much better, finally! Symptoms still come and go, good and bad days.Sneaking up on return to good health.  Alto gave me a 'Here Comes the Sun'!!!  ☼

Oct 2015-Feb 2016: Difficult several months, some good days but the bad days felt like I'm moving backwards.  Struggling after steady improvement, but hanging tough.

 

Current supplements:  Mg-Threonate; glutathione; krill oil; borage oil; phosphatidyl choline; multivite, vit B12, vit C, vit D vit E; OTC meds pseudoephedrine in the AM and benadryl at bedtime.  Clonidine 0.2 bid for high blood pressure.

Filled with hope, courage and self-appreciation.

Link to comment

It's the unpredictability of this process that slams me on the pavement. I suffer with many of your symptoms. I hope we both get some relief tonight and turn a corner tomorrow. ((hugs from one sensitive person to another))

January 2012 - Prescribed 900mg gabapentin and 30mg Norco for lower lumber spinal stenosis pain.

September 2013 - Spinal fusion surgery, 6 levels. Hospital ramped up meds 1500mg gabapentin, 100mg Norco, 80mg Oxycontin, 25mg Fentanyl patch.

January 2014 - Sever nausea daily and with back pain every 4 hours. 2 trips to ER. First endoscopy found ulcer. Treated with Sucralfate and PPI. Second endo in May found no ulcers. Doctors said it was the opiates causing the nausea. CT'd Oxycontin, Fentanyl patch.

July 2014 - Lost 48 lbs. due to not eating because of severe nausea. GP prescribed Prozac 20mg and Ativan 2mg prn. Tried for 4 days, quit. Two week followup GP said keep taking Prozac. 4 days, quit again. Ativan taken rarely prn for anxiety and appetite.

August 2014 - Went to detox. Off opiates. Still nauseous, helmet head, drugged feeling. Doctor CT'd gabapentin. Ended up in ER. Found 2 gallstones. Gabapentin reinstated at 900mg. Tried botched up and down taper to get off Gabapentin. No tapering advice from doctor. Said to just CT again.

September 2014 - Coded on table during gallbladder surgery. Developed liver biloma due to CPR by doctor. Had bile bulb inserted for 2 wks to drain.

October 2014 - Gallbladder removed. Still nauseous, 3am cortisol surging, drugged helmet head, vertigo, breathlessness, whooshing head, heart palps.

November 8th, 2014 - CT'd gabapentin suggested by family and 4 different doctors. Was told no withdrawal is associated with gabapentin. Have been in hell ever since. No windows, just one big tsunami every day with same symptoms for 4 months.

December 26, 2014 - Found SA. At least I know I'm not insane. My family thinks I'm doing this to myself. Akathesia has become unbearable.

March 10, 2015 - In absolute daily hell with no relief. Currently taking magnesium 200mg before bedtime.

Link to comment

 

 

 

Headache; loud ringing in the ears; fatigue and low energy; depressed mood with lots of crying and suicidal thoughts; difficulty sleeping more than an hour or two (my sleep generally has been good since September.)  Those are the main ones, they come and go with varying intensity during the day and night with no discernible pattern.  But the worst symptom or combination will rarely last more than a couple of hours.  In the last couple of weeks the depressed mood has been staying around for 4-8 hours at a time, but it does let up before too much time has passed.  The rapid starting and stopping of the symptoms is so strange.  Thanks for asking, Pug; I hope you and everyone else finds relief and good days.

 

Two more significant symptoms I forgot to note earlier.  Brain fog - cognitive impairment, difficulty trying to focus or think clearly, which can be separate from a depressed mood or it can accompany feelings of sadness/depression.  And stuffiness/fullness in the ears and face, feeling like the sinus and ear congestion that accompanies a cold or allergies. 

 

Something to add:  yesterday I took some benadryl during the day (I usually take 50mg at bedtime) and some naproxen because the headache and stuffiness was so strong.  I've completely failed at correlating the supplements and over-the-counter meds I take with the coming and going of my symptoms and periods of relief.  I've ended up chasing my tail with supplements, so I settled into a routine the last couple of months, with little changes.  But let me make note of this change, just in case it seems relevant later on.  I also had a ginger/turmeric/honey/cinnamon/milk drink, which I have not had for at least a month.

 

Having a pretty good day.  Started spectacularly good - before I fell asleep last night, I felt particularly calm and clear, then I had a great sleep.  Awoke feeling great.  Perfectly clear mind, no symptoms save for a minimal tinnitus.  When I get a window like this, initially it is disorienting, because it is so different than my status just a day before.  This is the feeling of good health, and I would do nearly anything to make it last. 

 

However, I thought to myself, 'better enjoy it, by noon it may be gone.'  In late morning, my typical symptoms started to creep in (HA, tinnitus, brain fog, stuffiness.  But, they never got too intense; by 3pm they seem to be weakening. 

 

These brief windows of several hours length give me hope, and I think they are becoming slightly more frequent.  Hopefully a sign of inching closer to good health.  The frustration of the return of symptoms after only several hours is huge, and I am trying my best to accept them.  Grateful for the relief; frustrated and angered at the waves.  I'm glad I have a lot of natural stubbornness that helps me keep going.  The quote attributed to Churchill, oft repeated here, is my approach:  "If you're going through hell, keep going."

1983-1995: On and off several tricyclic ADs
1995: Quit alcohol, started Prozac
2003: Stopped Prozac; 2004: Started Effexor XR 225
2014: Tried and failed three rapid tapers; stopped cold turkey March 11, 2014, eight days of Prozac as a bridge.
March 19, 2014: SSRI/SSNI free; four weeks acute withdrawal, then five month window of minimal symptoms.

Sept 2014-June 2015: Delayed, prolonged severe withdrawal from Effexor. Roller coaster, way up and way down.  Symptoms swing widely. Clear improvement in Mar-Apr, but still much hell. In May symptoms shifted to insomnia and depression, less HA, tinnitus and brain fog.

July-Sept 2015: After two weeks of using CES device, tremendous relief of insomnia, depression and other symptoms. Feeling much better, finally! Symptoms still come and go, good and bad days.Sneaking up on return to good health.  Alto gave me a 'Here Comes the Sun'!!!  ☼

Oct 2015-Feb 2016: Difficult several months, some good days but the bad days felt like I'm moving backwards.  Struggling after steady improvement, but hanging tough.

 

Current supplements:  Mg-Threonate; glutathione; krill oil; borage oil; phosphatidyl choline; multivite, vit B12, vit C, vit D vit E; OTC meds pseudoephedrine in the AM and benadryl at bedtime.  Clonidine 0.2 bid for high blood pressure.

Filled with hope, courage and self-appreciation.

Link to comment

I'm doing the Churchill thing. It's good to hear that your symptoms can abate, even for short periods. I felt happy for no reason for 10 or 15 minutes a few weeks ago. Kinda freaked me out, but I would welcome the return of the feeling.

2009: Cancer hospital said I had adjustment disorder because I thought they were doing it wrong. Their headshrinker prescribed Effexor, and my life set on a new course. I didn't know what was ahead, like a passenger on Disneyland's Matterhorn, smiling and waving as it climbs...clink, clink, clink.

2010: Post surgical accidental Effexor discontinuation by nurses, masked by intravenous Dilaudid. (The car is balanced at the top of the track.) I get home, pop a Vicodin, and ...

Whooosh...down, down, down, down, down...goes the trajectory of my life, up goes my mood and tendency to think everything is a good idea.
2012: After the bipolar jig was up, now a walking bag of unrelated symptoms, I went crazy on Daytrana (the Ritalin skin patch by Noven), because ADHD was a perfect fit for a bag of unrelated symptoms. I was prescribed Effexor for the nervousness of it, and things got neurological. An EEG showed enough activity to warrant an epilepsy diagnosis rather than non-epileptic ("psychogenic") seizures.

:o 2013-2014: Quit everything and got worse. I probably went through DAWS: dopamine agonist withdrawal syndrome. I drank to not feel, but I felt a lot: dread, fear, regret, grief: an utter sense of total loss of everything worth breathing about, for almost two years.

I was not suicidal but I wanted to be dead, at least dead to the experience of my own brain and body.

2015: I  began to recover after adding virgin coconut oil and organic grass-fed fed butter to a cup of instant coffee in the morning.

I did it hoping for mental acuity and better memory. After ten days of that, I was much better, mood-wise. Approximately neutral.

And, I experienced drowsiness. I could sleep. Not exactly happy, I did 30 days on Wellbutrin, because it had done me no harm in the past. 

I don't have the DAWS mood or state of mind. It never feel like doing anything if it means standing up.

In fact, I don't especially like moving. I'm a brain with a beanbag body.   :unsure:

Link to comment

I want this quote in my intro thread, so I can easily find it.  I love this reminder.

 

 

 

 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/3523-success-recovery-from-protracted-zoloft-withdrawal-and-pssd/

 

“The recovery was slow and painful, but I became conscious of every little improvement as it happened. I got used to the pattern: something would get better for a while, then suddenly everything would swing right back and all that recovery would vanish. But I learnt the trick - once something had recovered temporarily, it was only a matter of time before it recovered permanently. It made no difference if it came back for a while... it had already revealed its weakness, and sooner or later it was going to be gone for good. That was true in every single case.”

 

1983-1995: On and off several tricyclic ADs
1995: Quit alcohol, started Prozac
2003: Stopped Prozac; 2004: Started Effexor XR 225
2014: Tried and failed three rapid tapers; stopped cold turkey March 11, 2014, eight days of Prozac as a bridge.
March 19, 2014: SSRI/SSNI free; four weeks acute withdrawal, then five month window of minimal symptoms.

Sept 2014-June 2015: Delayed, prolonged severe withdrawal from Effexor. Roller coaster, way up and way down.  Symptoms swing widely. Clear improvement in Mar-Apr, but still much hell. In May symptoms shifted to insomnia and depression, less HA, tinnitus and brain fog.

July-Sept 2015: After two weeks of using CES device, tremendous relief of insomnia, depression and other symptoms. Feeling much better, finally! Symptoms still come and go, good and bad days.Sneaking up on return to good health.  Alto gave me a 'Here Comes the Sun'!!!  ☼

Oct 2015-Feb 2016: Difficult several months, some good days but the bad days felt like I'm moving backwards.  Struggling after steady improvement, but hanging tough.

 

Current supplements:  Mg-Threonate; glutathione; krill oil; borage oil; phosphatidyl choline; multivite, vit B12, vit C, vit D vit E; OTC meds pseudoephedrine in the AM and benadryl at bedtime.  Clonidine 0.2 bid for high blood pressure.

Filled with hope, courage and self-appreciation.

Link to comment

A little journaling.  After a pretty good day with tolerable symptoms, I had a horrible night.  Nearly no sleep, very intense tinnitus all night long.  I am spoiled by having pretty good sleep over these five months of WD, but not last night.  Finally got about three hours between 5:30 and 8:30, but poor quality, and had a bad cortisol rush on awakening (mine are pretty mild usually, lasting only a couple of minutes; I gotten them for years and years and they rarely bother me.)  Today, bad tinnitus, HA, brain fog and fatigue, at least my mood is ok.

 

After feeling so good yesterday morning, this felt like a huge slap.  It is wearing off, and I did skip some of my supplements for two days, maybe I caused this little intense wave.  Wide, deep swings, up/down.  I don't know what else to do, so I'll just keep going. 

 

1983-1995: On and off several tricyclic ADs
1995: Quit alcohol, started Prozac
2003: Stopped Prozac; 2004: Started Effexor XR 225
2014: Tried and failed three rapid tapers; stopped cold turkey March 11, 2014, eight days of Prozac as a bridge.
March 19, 2014: SSRI/SSNI free; four weeks acute withdrawal, then five month window of minimal symptoms.

Sept 2014-June 2015: Delayed, prolonged severe withdrawal from Effexor. Roller coaster, way up and way down.  Symptoms swing widely. Clear improvement in Mar-Apr, but still much hell. In May symptoms shifted to insomnia and depression, less HA, tinnitus and brain fog.

July-Sept 2015: After two weeks of using CES device, tremendous relief of insomnia, depression and other symptoms. Feeling much better, finally! Symptoms still come and go, good and bad days.Sneaking up on return to good health.  Alto gave me a 'Here Comes the Sun'!!!  ☼

Oct 2015-Feb 2016: Difficult several months, some good days but the bad days felt like I'm moving backwards.  Struggling after steady improvement, but hanging tough.

 

Current supplements:  Mg-Threonate; glutathione; krill oil; borage oil; phosphatidyl choline; multivite, vit B12, vit C, vit D vit E; OTC meds pseudoephedrine in the AM and benadryl at bedtime.  Clonidine 0.2 bid for high blood pressure.

Filled with hope, courage and self-appreciation.

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus

Hi OffEFF,

I've been reading through your latest posts, I'm sorry you are still feeling so unwell.  I noticed that you are taking pseudoephedrine and benadryl.  Do you take these often?

 

Pseudoephedrine is a stimulant and Benadryl contains an antihistamine, neither of these are recommended for someone trying to recover from psyche drugs.  In a sensitized nervous system, either of these drugs might cause paradoxical effects.

 

Some of the listed side effects of pseudoephedrine are:

 

Nervousness; excitability; dizziness; tremor; insomnia; restlessness; depression and headache.

http://www.drugs.com/sfx/pseudoephedrine-side-effects.html

 

Some of the listed side effects of benadryl are:

 

Depression, drowsiness,dizziness, disturbed coordination, mental confusion

http://www.drugs.com/sfx/benadryl-side-effects.html

 

Before withdrawal, I used to take pseudoephedrine whenever I got a cold and I remember the stimulating effect it always had on me, it felt just like taking an amphetamine.  I would never risk taking one now.  Trying to take stimulant meds for (mis)diagnosed ADHD while I was already struggling with AD withdrawal has contributed to worsening symptoms and ongoing protracted withdrawal.

 

If I were you, I would leave off the OTC drugs and see if you start to feel better.

 

 

 

 

I'm not a doctor.  My comments are not medical advise. These are my opinions based on my own experience and what I've learned. Please discuss your situation with a medical practitioner who has knowledge of tapering and withdrawal...if you are lucky enough to find one.

My Introduction Thread

Full Drug and Withdrawal History

Brief Summary

Several SSRIs for 13 years starting 1997 (for mild to moderate partly situational anxiety) Xanax PRN ~ Various other drugs over the years for side effects

2 month 'taper' off Lexapro 2010

Short acute withdrawal, followed by 2 -3 months of improvement then delayed protracted withdrawal

DX ADHD followed by several years of stimulants and other drugs trying to manage increasing symptoms

Failed reinstatement of Lexapro and trial of Prozac (became suicidal)

May 2013 Found SA, learned about withdrawal, stopped taking drugs...healing begins.

Protracted withdrawal, with a very sensitized nervous system, slowly recovering as time passes

Supplements which have helped: Vitamin C, Magnesium, Taurine

Bad reactions: Many supplements but mostly fish oil and Vitamin D

June 2016 - Started daily juicing, mostly vegetables and lots of greens.

Aug 2016 - Oct 2016 Best window ever, felt almost completely recovered

Oct 2016 -Symptoms returned - bad days and less bad days.

April 2018 - No windows, but significant improvement, it feels like permanent full recovery is close.

VIDEO: Where did the chemical imbalance theory come from?



VIDEO: How are psychiatric diagnoses made?



VIDEO: Why do psychiatric drugs have withdrawal syndromes?



VIDEO: Can psychiatric drugs cause long-lasting negative effects?

VIDEO: Dr. Claire Weekes

 

 

 

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Thanks, Petu. I go back and forth about whether or not to take these.  During this five month period I have stopped each of them for several days or a week at a time, w/o noticing much positive effect and a slight negative effect. The benadryl seems to help, particularly with sleep; the sudafed seems to help with stuffiness.  Some nights when I'm feeling bad, if I take a second dose of benadryl I am able to sleep.  But I am concerned they might be prolonging or worsening my WD.  I just don't know.  I've taken both for a long long time, off and on, for hay fever and other allergies, w/o any adverse effects, (although I know this WD leaves my brain hypersensitive and vulnerable) and I just have a sense they are helping, not hurting.  Damn if I know for sure.

 

Maybe I will try not taking them for a week and see if it helps, but I did try that a couple of times, I think last in December.  Thanks again for the info.

1983-1995: On and off several tricyclic ADs
1995: Quit alcohol, started Prozac
2003: Stopped Prozac; 2004: Started Effexor XR 225
2014: Tried and failed three rapid tapers; stopped cold turkey March 11, 2014, eight days of Prozac as a bridge.
March 19, 2014: SSRI/SSNI free; four weeks acute withdrawal, then five month window of minimal symptoms.

Sept 2014-June 2015: Delayed, prolonged severe withdrawal from Effexor. Roller coaster, way up and way down.  Symptoms swing widely. Clear improvement in Mar-Apr, but still much hell. In May symptoms shifted to insomnia and depression, less HA, tinnitus and brain fog.

July-Sept 2015: After two weeks of using CES device, tremendous relief of insomnia, depression and other symptoms. Feeling much better, finally! Symptoms still come and go, good and bad days.Sneaking up on return to good health.  Alto gave me a 'Here Comes the Sun'!!!  ☼

Oct 2015-Feb 2016: Difficult several months, some good days but the bad days felt like I'm moving backwards.  Struggling after steady improvement, but hanging tough.

 

Current supplements:  Mg-Threonate; glutathione; krill oil; borage oil; phosphatidyl choline; multivite, vit B12, vit C, vit D vit E; OTC meds pseudoephedrine in the AM and benadryl at bedtime.  Clonidine 0.2 bid for high blood pressure.

Filled with hope, courage and self-appreciation.

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  • Moderator Emeritus

 But I am concerned they might be prolonging or worsening my WD. ..

....Maybe I will try not taking them for a week and see if it helps, but I did try that a couple of times, I think last in December.

 

I'm not sure if stopping them for a week would be long enough to detect if it was a good change or not, in fact, it might actually cause you to feel worse for a while.  Perhaps rather than just stop them, you could taper off them one at a time.  If it were me, I would start with the psuedoephedrine, maybe cut down by 25% every two weeks.

 

From my own experience and from what I've learned here, anything which acts as a CNS stimulant often causes increased symptoms in one way or another.  I'm sure your allergy symptoms are difficult to deal with, so you have to do what's best for you.

 

You may find this topic helpful in some way:

 

sinus congestion, sneezing and runny nose

I'm not a doctor.  My comments are not medical advise. These are my opinions based on my own experience and what I've learned. Please discuss your situation with a medical practitioner who has knowledge of tapering and withdrawal...if you are lucky enough to find one.

My Introduction Thread

Full Drug and Withdrawal History

Brief Summary

Several SSRIs for 13 years starting 1997 (for mild to moderate partly situational anxiety) Xanax PRN ~ Various other drugs over the years for side effects

2 month 'taper' off Lexapro 2010

Short acute withdrawal, followed by 2 -3 months of improvement then delayed protracted withdrawal

DX ADHD followed by several years of stimulants and other drugs trying to manage increasing symptoms

Failed reinstatement of Lexapro and trial of Prozac (became suicidal)

May 2013 Found SA, learned about withdrawal, stopped taking drugs...healing begins.

Protracted withdrawal, with a very sensitized nervous system, slowly recovering as time passes

Supplements which have helped: Vitamin C, Magnesium, Taurine

Bad reactions: Many supplements but mostly fish oil and Vitamin D

June 2016 - Started daily juicing, mostly vegetables and lots of greens.

Aug 2016 - Oct 2016 Best window ever, felt almost completely recovered

Oct 2016 -Symptoms returned - bad days and less bad days.

April 2018 - No windows, but significant improvement, it feels like permanent full recovery is close.

VIDEO: Where did the chemical imbalance theory come from?



VIDEO: How are psychiatric diagnoses made?



VIDEO: Why do psychiatric drugs have withdrawal syndromes?



VIDEO: Can psychiatric drugs cause long-lasting negative effects?

VIDEO: Dr. Claire Weekes

 

 

 

Link to comment

Thanks, Petu. I have no allergy problems right now; I am taking these only to try and dampen down the withdrawal symptoms.  I will consider stopping or tapering them. 

1983-1995: On and off several tricyclic ADs
1995: Quit alcohol, started Prozac
2003: Stopped Prozac; 2004: Started Effexor XR 225
2014: Tried and failed three rapid tapers; stopped cold turkey March 11, 2014, eight days of Prozac as a bridge.
March 19, 2014: SSRI/SSNI free; four weeks acute withdrawal, then five month window of minimal symptoms.

Sept 2014-June 2015: Delayed, prolonged severe withdrawal from Effexor. Roller coaster, way up and way down.  Symptoms swing widely. Clear improvement in Mar-Apr, but still much hell. In May symptoms shifted to insomnia and depression, less HA, tinnitus and brain fog.

July-Sept 2015: After two weeks of using CES device, tremendous relief of insomnia, depression and other symptoms. Feeling much better, finally! Symptoms still come and go, good and bad days.Sneaking up on return to good health.  Alto gave me a 'Here Comes the Sun'!!!  ☼

Oct 2015-Feb 2016: Difficult several months, some good days but the bad days felt like I'm moving backwards.  Struggling after steady improvement, but hanging tough.

 

Current supplements:  Mg-Threonate; glutathione; krill oil; borage oil; phosphatidyl choline; multivite, vit B12, vit C, vit D vit E; OTC meds pseudoephedrine in the AM and benadryl at bedtime.  Clonidine 0.2 bid for high blood pressure.

Filled with hope, courage and self-appreciation.

Link to comment

Well, something weird happened with using benadryl yesterday.  I was having a very bad day, super sick and tired of this junk, feeling all used up.  Had not had a good nights sleep in three days, bad HA, bad brain fog and fatigue, and I really needed to be awake and rested this morning.  So, out of desperation, at about 8:30pm I took 100mg benadryl and some naprosyn. 

 

20 minutes later I felt great; the brain fog completely lifted, HA gone.  Like magic.  Another feature of my WD has been a very low appetite; this has never happened to me in my life.  No matter how depressed, or how medicated or stressed, I always want to eat, until this 5 month period.  I forced myself to eat an orange and a handful of almonds during the day yesterday.  But 20 minutes after the benadryl, as these other symptoms disappeared, I was suddenly hungry.  Went to the kitchen and made a real dinner.  So damn strange.

 

I didn't sleep great, but better than the last few nights, got about four solid hours.  Today I have felt pretty good, more sleep deprived than anything else, no brain fog and a mild HA off and on.  I was able to accomplish a lot today that I have not been able to attend to for weeks.

 

So, I am more confused as to what to do regarding benadryl.  I am sure the next time my WD symptoms are really strong I will reach for some, but I realize this could lead me to other problems.  Had a session with my doc today, he has no idea, but he is concerned that benadryl could give me some 'paradoxical' activation/agitation.  But I have not had that happen (nor with the pseudoephedrine.) 

 

I hope we can still be friends, Petu, if I do the opposite of what you have suggested ;).  But I am going to try to stick to the basic recommendation of slow, steady, no drastic changes.  I saw someone new joined yesterday who had experienced a horrible reaction to benadryl.  This stuff is strange, confusing, and leaves me not knowing what to do or not to do.  But if I get another day like today soon, or even a couple of them, I'll be a happy boy.

1983-1995: On and off several tricyclic ADs
1995: Quit alcohol, started Prozac
2003: Stopped Prozac; 2004: Started Effexor XR 225
2014: Tried and failed three rapid tapers; stopped cold turkey March 11, 2014, eight days of Prozac as a bridge.
March 19, 2014: SSRI/SSNI free; four weeks acute withdrawal, then five month window of minimal symptoms.

Sept 2014-June 2015: Delayed, prolonged severe withdrawal from Effexor. Roller coaster, way up and way down.  Symptoms swing widely. Clear improvement in Mar-Apr, but still much hell. In May symptoms shifted to insomnia and depression, less HA, tinnitus and brain fog.

July-Sept 2015: After two weeks of using CES device, tremendous relief of insomnia, depression and other symptoms. Feeling much better, finally! Symptoms still come and go, good and bad days.Sneaking up on return to good health.  Alto gave me a 'Here Comes the Sun'!!!  ☼

Oct 2015-Feb 2016: Difficult several months, some good days but the bad days felt like I'm moving backwards.  Struggling after steady improvement, but hanging tough.

 

Current supplements:  Mg-Threonate; glutathione; krill oil; borage oil; phosphatidyl choline; multivite, vit B12, vit C, vit D vit E; OTC meds pseudoephedrine in the AM and benadryl at bedtime.  Clonidine 0.2 bid for high blood pressure.

Filled with hope, courage and self-appreciation.

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Thanks, Petu. I have no allergy problems right now; I am taking these only to try and dampen down the withdrawal symptoms.  I will consider stopping or tapering them. 

 

I will say the few times I took an antihistamine I always felt it set me back... I would go backwards to where I had already been in wd... including some very bad rough symptoms this was most noticeable when I could not sleep as that is the only time i would chance taking part of a pill usually a third... of a pill...

when I had not slept for 3-4 days and I felt missing any more sleep was going to push me to the psych ward... then i took a third and slept but I always felt I would pay for it as symptoms would slide back to the previous step in healing.. to me it really felt that way. 

 

I read something once about a feed back mechanism in our body/brains... up one thing something else gears down... we are not a stable entity we only feel that way when we are well in truth our body is adapting all the time to differences in and around us... once we are destabilized we don't slide a long from gear to gear like we once did ... changing gears is sluggish and unresponsive at some points.

 

we are putting one foot on the gas ... then the brake... obviously I don't know enough about how cars work to have this make sense but I think there is a story there :) sorry I can't find words just now to say what I mean...

Hope it makes sense...

They all have to work together... transmission brakes fuel system ... they are interrelated... each affects the next... if you slam on the breaks ..you need more gas to push you ahead... and the transmission what.. oh I give up ...

peace 

peace 

 

I think Petus idea of tapering is brilliant. 

WARNING THIS WILL BE LONG
Had a car accident in 85
Codeine was the pain med when I was release from hosp continuous use till 89
Given PROZAC by a specialist to help with nerve pain in my leg 89-90 not sure which year
Was not told a thing about it being a psych med thought it was a pain killer no info about psych side effects I went nuts had hallucinations. As I had a head injury and was diagnosed with a concussion in 85 I was sent to a head injury clinic in 1990 five years after the accident. I don't think they knew I had been on prozac I did not think it a big deal and never did finish the bottle of pills. I had tests of course lots of them. Was put into a pain clinic and given amitriptyline which stopped the withdrawal but had many side effects. But I could sleep something I had not done in a very long time the pain lessened. My mother got cancer in 94 they switched my meds to Zoloft to help deal with this pressure as I was her main care giver she died in 96. I stopped zoloft in 96 had withdrawal was put on paxil went nutty quit it ct put on resperidol quit it ct had withdrawal was put on Effexor... 2years later celexa was added 20mg then increased to 40mg huge personality change went wild. Did too fast taper off Celexa 05 as I felt unwell for a long time prior... quit Effexor 150mg ct 07 found ****** 8 months into withdrawal learned some things was banned from there in 08 have kept learning since. there is really not enough room here to put my history but I have a lot of opinions about a lot of things especially any of the drugs mentioned above.
One thing I would like to add here is this tidbit ALL OPIATES INCREASE SEROTONIN it is not a huge jump to being in chronic pain to being put on an ssri/snri and opiates will affect your antidepressants and your thinking.

As I do not update much I will put my quit date Nov. 17 2007 I quit Effexor cold turkey. 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1096-introducing-myself-btdt/

There is a crack in everything ..That's how the light gets in :)

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I think Petus idea of tapering is brilliant. 

 

Me too.  I am giving it a lot of thought.

 

I've been doing some reading tonight, and I'm making no decisions right away, I'm going to keep it stable and see how my symptoms manifest the next few days.  

1983-1995: On and off several tricyclic ADs
1995: Quit alcohol, started Prozac
2003: Stopped Prozac; 2004: Started Effexor XR 225
2014: Tried and failed three rapid tapers; stopped cold turkey March 11, 2014, eight days of Prozac as a bridge.
March 19, 2014: SSRI/SSNI free; four weeks acute withdrawal, then five month window of minimal symptoms.

Sept 2014-June 2015: Delayed, prolonged severe withdrawal from Effexor. Roller coaster, way up and way down.  Symptoms swing widely. Clear improvement in Mar-Apr, but still much hell. In May symptoms shifted to insomnia and depression, less HA, tinnitus and brain fog.

July-Sept 2015: After two weeks of using CES device, tremendous relief of insomnia, depression and other symptoms. Feeling much better, finally! Symptoms still come and go, good and bad days.Sneaking up on return to good health.  Alto gave me a 'Here Comes the Sun'!!!  ☼

Oct 2015-Feb 2016: Difficult several months, some good days but the bad days felt like I'm moving backwards.  Struggling after steady improvement, but hanging tough.

 

Current supplements:  Mg-Threonate; glutathione; krill oil; borage oil; phosphatidyl choline; multivite, vit B12, vit C, vit D vit E; OTC meds pseudoephedrine in the AM and benadryl at bedtime.  Clonidine 0.2 bid for high blood pressure.

Filled with hope, courage and self-appreciation.

Link to comment

20 minutes later I felt great; the brain fog completely lifted, HA gone.  Like magic.  Another feature of my WD has been a very low appetite; this has never happened to me in my life.  No matter how depressed, or how medicated or stressed, I always want to eat, until this 5 month period.  I forced myself to eat an orange and a handful of almonds during the day yesterday.  But 20 minutes after the benadryl, as these other symptoms disappeared, I was suddenly hungry.  Went to the kitchen and made a real dinner.  So damn strange.

 

When I first started looking up ways to withdraw on venlafaxine on the internet I found many users who experienced relief through the use of antihistamines and fish oil, so this doesn't really sound that strange to me. I'm not sure if this is something that only happens during venlafaxine withdrawal, as venlafaxine withdrawal is somewhat different than the SSRI's.

 

That said, it does sound like you're experiencing hardcore benadryl addiction, although I'm not even sure if such a thing exists. Reading up on it that seems quite unlikely though, then again many of the things I've been experiencing during withdrawal seem quite unlikely and illogical probably due to desensitized nervous system. Me experiencing something akin to serotonin syndrome on 10 mg of prozac made doctors think I was absolutely nuts, and yet that was the reality of the situation. There's many things when it comes to withdrawal that seem most mysterious to me. I'm hoping that in 5-10 years time, we will have a greater understanding on this issue, as I feel that there truly and honestly is too little information out there. 

Have been on psyc drugs for years, too many to include in this signature.

 

Currently on 475 mg lyrica, 37.5 mg venlafaxine 50mg seroquel, 2mg melatonin.

 

1-2.5 litres chamomile, only thing that seems to help with all of this.

 

Multivitamin and vitamin D prescribed by doctor for not going out in the sun enough. 

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I am just seeing this, I had a very severe reaction to benadryl. So strange, instead of a dose of 50mg knocking me out, I could not sleep and was racing around the house cleaning.

 

Be very careful with this. Even though it's generally tolerable for most people, it definitely has an ssri type quality. I'm guessing your positive reaction was that it had just enough effect to mimic a very low dose ssri, enough to feed your system what it is withdrawing from and keep the withdrawal symptoms down.

 

If you continue taking it, even on a not so regular basis, I would taper from it just the same. Unfortunately, in my quest to understand it, there is very scanty stories on the net that others found themselves quite addicted and resulted in them having to taper, just like any other psych medication.

 

I've often wondered if I were to take an extremely next to nothing low dose, if it would have a positive effect but I've come through this 6 months and it's a risk I cannot take. This is just my very nasty experience with it and I would hate to see you go through more torment. I have so much respect for everyone here bravely going through this battle to get off these meds. Just my 6 months alone with this, you all have to be the strongest people on Earth. The mental torture is enough to bring the most sane person to their knees begging for relief.

1997, 10mg Zoloft, c/t after week, no problems; 1997 lexapro, c/t after week, no problems. 2004 synthroid 88 mcg, Armour thyroid 30 mg. current-synthroid 50 mg, armour thyroid 60 mg. August 2014 4 mg betamethasone inj, rocephin inj, bactrim ds 180/750, epipen inj, 3 mg Albuterol inhaled, benadryl as box instructed for less than 72 hour period, 75 mg effexor, quit after one dose

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Thanks you guys.  Fuhget, I read your intro post the other day, and I am taking your experience into consideration.

 

I do not think I am addicted to benadryl (and I've been addicted to stuff before, notably alcohol.)  (yeah, I know, famous last words.)  Of course I could be wrong, and I won't bore you with my pattern of benadryl use over the past five months, but the delayed WD symptoms preceded my benadryl use by a solid month, and I have stopped the benadryl for a week at a time w/o noticing any significant change in symptoms (except a little difficulty falling asleep.)  If indeed I am addicted, it will become clear with time.  One thing about most addictions, they progresses and they become obvious with time as it progresses

 

Actually, what I fear is becoming addicted to benadryl at this point.  I am not pooh-poohing the risk at all.  But if I get such dramatic relief from increasing my benadryl dose from 50 to 100 mg, that could definitely become a problem if I resort to that again.

 

I have had zero activation symptoms that I can attribute to benadryl or anything else.  I've only had a couple of days over the entire five month ordeal when my mind felt particularly overactive, and those spells seemed to come and go randomly.  During the insomnia of the past week, my mind feels oddly quiet, I just can't fall asleep.   Definitely no serotonin syndrome, which would be exceedingly unlikely on 50-100 of benadryl and no other serotonin-promoting drug.

 

Benadryl has 'weak' serotonin reuptake activity.  That is why they modified it to create prozac back in the 70s.  I have not been able to find a source online that quantifies exactly how weak that activity is, but I haven't gone to the library yet.  This weak serotonin effect could well be the reason it provided me such dramatic relief the other day; it is possible I am building tolerance to the nightly 50mg dose, which is of course a sign of dependence/addiction.  OTOH, it could well be the other, more powerful actions of benadryl that provide symptom relief.  Or, that the lifting of my symptoms the other day was a random event, not related to the benadryl. 

 

Benadryl is notorious for causing weird, sometimes extreme reactions in a small number of people.  I have a little bit of experience using it on patients in the acute setting.  I could give it to 100 patients in a row with the expected response, then have one who has a horrific response to it.  (even while unconscious, under anesthesia - a sudden drastic shift in blood pressure, up or down; fortunately this is very very rare.)

 

I've read up on the recreational abuse of benadryl.  Lots of scary stories and information on this, it sure makes me scared. 

 

I'm thoroughly discussing this with my doctor as I go along.  He was my doc in early recovery from alcohol, and he is also concerned about activation symptoms,  Watching for these, but hasn't happened yet.

 

I took my usual 50mg of benadryl last night, and I slept very well, for the first time in four days.  Again, my symptom pattern over the past five months has been a wide variety of symptoms appearing, then disappearing, along side my standard HA/tinnitus/brain fog/fatigue/crying spells and depressed mood.  With luck, the three nights of insomnia will be yet another example.

 

Yesterday was a great day all around, other than some sleep deprivation (and I was able to nap in the pm).  Today I felt great until about noon, then my old friends HA and brain fog gradually reappeared, just to let me know it ain't over yet.  Not gonna overthink this, not gonna make any drastic changes.  I can definitely see a slow taper of benadryl in my future, after this WD decides to open up a longer window of recovery.  It may well be that the benadryl has been a de facto reinstatement of a serotonin drug, at a very low dose.  Then slowly taper it down.  It makes a lot of sense. 

 

Thanks again everyone, I'll keep you posted.

Edited by OffEFFexor

1983-1995: On and off several tricyclic ADs
1995: Quit alcohol, started Prozac
2003: Stopped Prozac; 2004: Started Effexor XR 225
2014: Tried and failed three rapid tapers; stopped cold turkey March 11, 2014, eight days of Prozac as a bridge.
March 19, 2014: SSRI/SSNI free; four weeks acute withdrawal, then five month window of minimal symptoms.

Sept 2014-June 2015: Delayed, prolonged severe withdrawal from Effexor. Roller coaster, way up and way down.  Symptoms swing widely. Clear improvement in Mar-Apr, but still much hell. In May symptoms shifted to insomnia and depression, less HA, tinnitus and brain fog.

July-Sept 2015: After two weeks of using CES device, tremendous relief of insomnia, depression and other symptoms. Feeling much better, finally! Symptoms still come and go, good and bad days.Sneaking up on return to good health.  Alto gave me a 'Here Comes the Sun'!!!  ☼

Oct 2015-Feb 2016: Difficult several months, some good days but the bad days felt like I'm moving backwards.  Struggling after steady improvement, but hanging tough.

 

Current supplements:  Mg-Threonate; glutathione; krill oil; borage oil; phosphatidyl choline; multivite, vit B12, vit C, vit D vit E; OTC meds pseudoephedrine in the AM and benadryl at bedtime.  Clonidine 0.2 bid for high blood pressure.

Filled with hope, courage and self-appreciation.

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Good luck! I think pretty much all of you here are much more careful with any use of drugs, ex or otc. You have a lot more risk involved so I think that helps keep more in tune to what the addition or this or that is doing.

 

It kind of frightens me that I became that one person who had the strange reaction. Could be that the antibiotics had already started an affect and the benadryl was the nail in the coffin. I know there are a few antibiotics that can affect serotonin, just not sure about bactrim or rocephin. I do know that bactrim has a lot of angry customers due to the very weird and scary side effects.

 

I hope it continues to see you through with no problems and you are able to put all of it behind you and live your life symptom free.

1997, 10mg Zoloft, c/t after week, no problems; 1997 lexapro, c/t after week, no problems. 2004 synthroid 88 mcg, Armour thyroid 30 mg. current-synthroid 50 mg, armour thyroid 60 mg. August 2014 4 mg betamethasone inj, rocephin inj, bactrim ds 180/750, epipen inj, 3 mg Albuterol inhaled, benadryl as box instructed for less than 72 hour period, 75 mg effexor, quit after one dose

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Man, more of the same, up/down, back/forth.

 

Some good news:  in some ways I was more functional this week than I have been in months.  Able to work a little bit more, actually applied for some jobs, attended to some chores I've been neglecting.  After four nights out of five of crappy sleep, I've had two nights of very good sleep, slightly better than the sleep I typically get during this five-month wave.  My sleep generally is ok, I dread falling into general insomnia.  The suicide thoughts that were getting kinda strong and frequent a couple of weeks ago have drastically decreased.  It's weird, I can have a few hours when I feel very sad and hopeless, yet suicide doesn't pop into my mind.  And generally the HA and tinnitus have been definitely weaker for most of the time over the past few days. On Monday the HA was horrific for a few hours, but that was five days ago and it hasn't been bad at all since.

 

The bad news:  I've had more frequent spells of a few hours when I feel very sad and hopeless.  I was crying on and off all day yesterday.  Rather than feeling a deeply depressed mood, instead I feel just fed up with this WD process, fatigued and desperate for it to end.  24 hours earlier, I had felt pretty darn good, had a busy work day, and felt almost normal except for sleep deprived (working on two hours.)  Today I have felt just empty; not particularly sad or depressed, but just that I am drained and have no motivation to do anything at all.  The uncertainty, about whether I should change course and try restarting something, about how long this is gonna last, about the drastic swings up and down, weighs heavily. 

 

The glimpses of feeling good/normal are there, and seem to be a bit more frequent.  The bad spells tend to fade after a few hours; even now the emptiness that was powerful this morning is fading a bit. 

 

wrt the benadryl, I'm just gonna stick with the 50mg at night, and resist the urge to increase dose or frequency when the symptoms are severe or if insomnia returns.  Keep it steady.  If I continue to see these small signs of improved health, then I'll leave tapering of that for later.  Same for the pseudoephedrine in the mornings.  Based on my history with these meds, both in the past 11 months since CT effexor, and for many years before that, I'm making the guess that just holding steady is the course least likely to cause trouble at the moment. 

 

I asked my doc if I chose to throw in the towel and consent to a new treatment, he surprised me.  He didn't name a medication, but said he would probably suggest the forehead electrical stimulation device thing.  I think it is kinda silly, and I prefer leaving my brain alone to do its healing thing, but the downside to that seems pretty low. 

 

I am humbled that so many other people are suffering much worse than me, and as well I try to take solace in the small hours-long windows I've enjoyed recently.  I can't wait until this stuff is over.

1983-1995: On and off several tricyclic ADs
1995: Quit alcohol, started Prozac
2003: Stopped Prozac; 2004: Started Effexor XR 225
2014: Tried and failed three rapid tapers; stopped cold turkey March 11, 2014, eight days of Prozac as a bridge.
March 19, 2014: SSRI/SSNI free; four weeks acute withdrawal, then five month window of minimal symptoms.

Sept 2014-June 2015: Delayed, prolonged severe withdrawal from Effexor. Roller coaster, way up and way down.  Symptoms swing widely. Clear improvement in Mar-Apr, but still much hell. In May symptoms shifted to insomnia and depression, less HA, tinnitus and brain fog.

July-Sept 2015: After two weeks of using CES device, tremendous relief of insomnia, depression and other symptoms. Feeling much better, finally! Symptoms still come and go, good and bad days.Sneaking up on return to good health.  Alto gave me a 'Here Comes the Sun'!!!  ☼

Oct 2015-Feb 2016: Difficult several months, some good days but the bad days felt like I'm moving backwards.  Struggling after steady improvement, but hanging tough.

 

Current supplements:  Mg-Threonate; glutathione; krill oil; borage oil; phosphatidyl choline; multivite, vit B12, vit C, vit D vit E; OTC meds pseudoephedrine in the AM and benadryl at bedtime.  Clonidine 0.2 bid for high blood pressure.

Filled with hope, courage and self-appreciation.

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