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steeley: introducing myself


steeley

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Hello everyone.  I am an ex memer of Paxil Progress and you have been recommended to me as an alternative. 

 

I am WD from Mirtazapine and am down to 4.50mg from 30mgs tapering over approximately 16 months. 

 

One of the main reasons I wanted to make contact was to try to inform those PP people/friends who were blocked from me when the site closed.  I wanted to say hello and see how people are going.

 

I am fumbling around this site trying to work it out (what is a topic tag?) and was wondering about Mattage; JMarie' Aberdeen; CaperJackie; BrassMonkey; Babs; Songbird; Junior and a host of others that I have come to know over time.

 

I have no idea how to use this site yet, but wanted to stick my head in to try and reconnect, and perhaps find others I can relate to. 

 

Just didn't wanted people to think I had disappeared, and needed to say that the closing of the site has been depressing to say the least.  I feel in some ways responsible, not all ways, but it has really impacted me. 

 

If anyone I know picks this up it would be good to hear from you.

 

steeley        

Prescribed 30mg Mirtazapine approximately 10 years ago.  PTSD 

 

C/T 50% of dose - dreadful, hellish

Begin to reduce by 10% every 3-6 weeks

now:

5.11.14 4.50mg - going to wait a bit longer

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STEELEY!!   STEELEY!!   WOOT WOOT WOOT!

Put on Prothiaden for severe depression in 1989.  Recovered.   Prescribed Paxil for another bout of depression around 2000.   Have been trying to taper ever since but always crash about 2 months after getting to zero.   Because of the crashes, for years I thought that there was something wrong with me.   Then found that the crashes were simply withdrawal.   Now following a maximum of a 10% reduction every month or so and ready to slow down any time I feel any symptoms whatsoever.  Feeling good:).

7th Jan 15 - 3.6mg

28th Jan 15 - 3.2mg

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Holy Dooley! Fair suck of the sav !

G'day Steely me good ol fair dinkum Aussi mate...you trouble maker you!! You ve turned us all into a pack of Galahs !

 

Was going to give you somefair dinkum  tongue n cheek castigating but didnt want to scare you off. So i will stop now. I reckon finding this place is as good as winning the scratchies.

 

Great to see you ...welcome many have been wondering how you were ...so i'm sure when the others wake up they will be in to say hi.

Gee we thought for a mo we might have to call out the ambo to look for ya mate.

 

Please dont feel bad about anything ... this all happened about a year ago as well. So dont go walkabout over it . This is totally not your fault ....but please ....just a wee request .....dont send any rude aggro pms to the moderators on this site ...cos i dont want to end up being a swagman down by the billabong in the sh*thouse all alone talking to dunny budgies should this site do its block and end up pushing up daisys!  lol

 

Dont worry cober,  Auntie Laurie just spat the dummy, she doesnt know easter from Bourke street  but she'll  be right mate ....when she gets around to roping in the loose roo in the top paddock, then she'll be apples!

By the way this site is chock a block full of good tucker. Im still getting used to this site too ...so get flat out like a lizard drinking and you'll soon get the hang of it. In the meantime unravel ya swag get out the chilly bin and help yourself to a stubby get the sunnies out and just enjoy the view.

 

Anyway just wanted to say strewth  mate stoked to see you.

Thought for the day: Lets stand up, and let’s speak out , together. G Olsen

We have until the 14th. Feb 2018. 

URGENT REQUEST Please consider submitting  for the petition on Prescribed Drug Dependence and Withdrawal currently awaiting its third consideration at the Scottish Parliament. You don't even have to be from Scotland. By clicking on the link below you can read some of the previous submissions but be warned many of them are quite harrowing.

http://www.parliament.scot/GettingInvolved/Petitions/PE01651   

Please tell them about your problems taking and withdrawing from antidepressants and/or benzos.

Send by email to petitions@parliament.scot and quote PE01651 in the subject heading. Keep to a maximum of 3 sides of A4 and you can't name for legal reasons any doctor you have consulted. Tell them if you wish to remain anonymous. We need the numbers to help convince the committee members we are not isolated cases. You have until mid February. Thank you

Recovering paxil addict

None of the published articles shed light on what ssri's ... actually do or what their hazards might be. Healy 2013. 

This is so true, with anything you get on these drugs, dependance, tapering, withdrawal symptoms, side effects, just silent. And if there is something mentioned then their is a serious disconnect between what is said and reality! 

  "Every time I read of a multi-person shooting, I always presume that person had just started a SSRI or had just stopped."  Dr Mosher. Me too! 

Over two decades later, the number of antidepressant prescriptions a year is slightly more than the number of people in the Western world. Most (nine out of 10) prescriptions are for patients who faced difficulties on stopping, equating to about a tenth of the population. These patients are often advised to continue treatment because their difficulties indicate they need ongoing treatment, just as a person with diabetes needs insulin. Healy 2015

I believe the ssri era will soon stand as one of the most shameful in the history of medicine. Healy 2015

Let people help people ... in a natural, kind, non-addictive (and non-big pharma) way. J Broadley 2017

 

 

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Hi steeley,

Welcome to SA, I'm glad you found your way here.  I was also a member at Paxil Progress, but rarely posted.  All your friends are here, many have been concerned about you.  Here is a link to a members only thread which will help you catch up with everything which has been going on:

Paxil Progress is Closing

You are not responsible for what happened, not in any way at all.  I'm sorry that this has impacted on you so badly, I hope you start to feel better soon.

 

You can find Mattage; JMarie' Aberdeen; CaperJackie; BrassMonkey; Babs; Songbird;  and Junior by looking for their names in the introductions/update forum.  Oh!  JMarie is known as Ladybug here.

 

You can use this thread as your ongoing journal to track progress and communicate with the community, add to it whenever you want.  This is how we stay in touch here.

 

Petu.

I'm not a doctor.  My comments are not medical advise. These are my opinions based on my own experience and what I've learned. Please discuss your situation with a medical practitioner who has knowledge of tapering and withdrawal...if you are lucky enough to find one.

My Introduction Thread

Full Drug and Withdrawal History

Brief Summary

Several SSRIs for 13 years starting 1997 (for mild to moderate partly situational anxiety) Xanax PRN ~ Various other drugs over the years for side effects

2 month 'taper' off Lexapro 2010

Short acute withdrawal, followed by 2 -3 months of improvement then delayed protracted withdrawal

DX ADHD followed by several years of stimulants and other drugs trying to manage increasing symptoms

Failed reinstatement of Lexapro and trial of Prozac (became suicidal)

May 2013 Found SA, learned about withdrawal, stopped taking drugs...healing begins.

Protracted withdrawal, with a very sensitized nervous system, slowly recovering as time passes

Supplements which have helped: Vitamin C, Magnesium, Taurine

Bad reactions: Many supplements but mostly fish oil and Vitamin D

June 2016 - Started daily juicing, mostly vegetables and lots of greens.

Aug 2016 - Oct 2016 Best window ever, felt almost completely recovered

Oct 2016 -Symptoms returned - bad days and less bad days.

April 2018 - No windows, but significant improvement, it feels like permanent full recovery is close.

VIDEO: Where did the chemical imbalance theory come from?



VIDEO: How are psychiatric diagnoses made?



VIDEO: Why do psychiatric drugs have withdrawal syndromes?



VIDEO: Can psychiatric drugs cause long-lasting negative effects?

VIDEO: Dr. Claire Weekes

 

 

 

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lolol Mark you're loopy!  He's as mad as a meat-axe Steeley.  Soooo good to see you :)

Put on Prothiaden for severe depression in 1989.  Recovered.   Prescribed Paxil for another bout of depression around 2000.   Have been trying to taper ever since but always crash about 2 months after getting to zero.   Because of the crashes, for years I thought that there was something wrong with me.   Then found that the crashes were simply withdrawal.   Now following a maximum of a 10% reduction every month or so and ready to slow down any time I feel any symptoms whatsoever.  Feeling good:).

7th Jan 15 - 3.6mg

28th Jan 15 - 3.2mg

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Steeley! Yay, I have my mirt buddy back! So good to hear from you.

2008 - Doctors appointment with stress induced anxiety led to Citalopram prescription.

Severe adverse reaction

Mirtazapine prescribed - adverse reaction but told to stay on.

Poop out - December 2013

15mg

Currently on 13.5mg,

April 12mg

May 10th - 11mg

June 10th - 10mg

July 8th - 9mg

September - 0mg

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A big, huge, warm hug and welcome, Steeley!

 

I joined paxilprogress back in the dinosaur days (OK, 2007 - a year into hellish withdrawal from paxil), for the sole purpose of being able to send a PM to Altostrata, who later founded and so brilliantly runs this group.  For a long time I was there only rarely, but happened by chance to be looking for an old thread and saw what was happening. Was going to send you a PM of love and support, but in a nutshell, the site was gone before I could do that.

 

I had asked about you, and was hoping so much you would come here. I think you will find all your old friends here and make new friends too. You'll find many, many people from the long history of PP here, too. We all care about you and welcome you.

 

What happened on PP is NOT your fault. You just walked innocently into a minefield. PP had been at a breaking point so long that I'm amazed it lasted as long as it did. Most people who knew that were no longer there, so newer members didn't see it. Believe me, I know what I was talking about.

 

I'm so sorry that you were subjected to such an upsetting experience. I'm sorry that all concerned were. But you are all welcomed with open arms here, and before you know it it will feel like home.

 

You'll find this group is very much like PP but without the "head trips" that drove so many of us off even though we had loved it so much. That is not done here. We are here to help and support each other, not to tell people how to think or how to live their lives. Not to lash out at each other, but to gently support. The software and setup are a little different, but not as much as it might seem at first.

 

Alto and I used to wrack our brains on what to call the "Introductions and updates" section, because the idea was to replace the increasingly unwieldy "General Discussion" concept with a better way to find information readily, and to consolidate people's posts to a large degree so people could easily become famliliar with a person's case and give more personalized and accurate advice and replies. Other questions of a more general nature (i.e., "How do I turn my med into a liquid for tapering slowly" and things like that have other sections, as do those that cover more general topics of support, like relationships with family and friends, our spirits, etc.

 

I think you'll get comfortable here very quickly and like it here very much. We are very happy to have you here. :wub:

I was "TryingToGetWell" (aka TTGW) on paxilprogress. I also was one of the original members here on Surviving Antidepressants

 

I had horrific and protracted withdrawal from paxil, but now am back to enjoying life with enthusiasm to the max, some residual physical symptoms continued but largely improve. The horror, severe derealization, anhedonia, akathisia, and so much more, are long over.

 

My signature is a temporary scribble from year 2013. I'll rewrite it when I can.

 

If you want to read it, click on http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/209-brandy-anyone/?p=110343

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NZ1 - :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

 

Are you sure you're a kiwi?

 

Many of my best friends on PP back when it was fun there (fun and games in withdrawal lol) were Aussies and kiwis. I lo-o-o-ove the Australian "language." Got so good at it back there someone in Oz asked me if I wasn't a closet Aussie. Best compliment I ever got! (Fair dinkum. Dinkie-die.)

 

For those who are standing on their heads trying to read NZ's post, we used to use some of these "back in the day":

 

http://www.koalanet.com.au/australian-slang.html

 

http://www15.uta.fi/FAST/US1/REF/aust-eng.html#intro

 

(I have more on my old computer. Never finished transferring data from when support for XP stopped.) (Still love XP but I won't whinge here.)

 

(*slinks back and waits to hear how she made a nit of herself here*)

 

Returning Steeley's post back to her... :)

I was "TryingToGetWell" (aka TTGW) on paxilprogress. I also was one of the original members here on Surviving Antidepressants

 

I had horrific and protracted withdrawal from paxil, but now am back to enjoying life with enthusiasm to the max, some residual physical symptoms continued but largely improve. The horror, severe derealization, anhedonia, akathisia, and so much more, are long over.

 

My signature is a temporary scribble from year 2013. I'll rewrite it when I can.

 

If you want to read it, click on http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/209-brandy-anyone/?p=110343

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Steely!  So glad you found you way here.  Welcome :)

 

Oh and Merry bloody (hope this doesn't offend anyone) Christmas, mate!

Personal history of GAD and 4 melancholic depressive episodes - two treated with Amityptline

Family history of Bipolar Disorder - goes back at least 3 generations

Adult son with autism, ADHD, intellectual disability and Bipolar II

Put on Aropax / Paxil in July 1997 for anther episode.  Decision to stay on it - worst decision of my life.

Began to poop out in late 2008. Switched to Lexapro March 2009.  Made me suicidal.  Tried Cymbalta for 19 days. Horrible w/d.

Found PP and RI'd Aropax at about the same time - August 2009.  Began slow taper in 2010. Crashed in 13-11mg range in mid 2013.  Switched to Citalopram 21 Oct 2013 in an attempt to stabilise.

 

There are things that are known, and things that are unknown; in between are doors - Anonymous

 

https://itunes.apple.com/au/book/longing-for-life/id958423649  My book about my unsuccessful journey through IVF

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Hello steeley! I was Jupiter on PP. I didn't post there much. I was mostly on Surviving antidepressants, but we exchanged some posts. Welcome to surviving antidepressants!

The only way out is through.

 

Aug 2013 - Augmentin leading to akathisia

Sept-Nov 2013 - Citalopram 20mg, severe reaction, off at 5mg. Valium 4mg, prn

Oct 2013 - 5 zopiclone tablets, 7.5mg

End Nov 2013-end Feb 2014, Seroquel, top dose 150mg, off at 25mg

End Nov 2013-early march 2014, Zoloft 100mg top dose, off at 25mg

End Dec-2013-early April 2014, lorazepam 1mg prn

April 3rd 2014 zoloft 5mg for a few days. 18/4/14 - zoloft, 1mg. Came off at 0.35 mg,14th June 2014

29 June 2014 - 1mg lorazepam, last ever

29 June 2014 - med free

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steely I remember you.  I was kairbear on that site.  Welcome!

2002-put on amitryptiline for fibromyalgia. 10mg.2004-stopped abruptly. Didn't think it helped.2006 approx.-put on Paxil for mild anxiety 20 mg.2007 upped to 40 mg. not sure why.2011- tapered from 40 to 10. went nuts and went back to 20mg2014- tapered from 20mg to 0 from April to The end of June.current meds- Metformin(type 2 diabetic) and low dose aspirin.Take multi vitamin and vit b12, vit. D and magnesium. 5 months off Paxil. Still suffering.recently added 1.2mg of Paxil to alleviate withdrawals.(Nov 30)Dropped to .9mg because having symptoms from reinstatement.(dec 23)<p>taper to .76mg-.8mg (Feb 3) approx. weight .010 to about .008-.009 on scale.
.6mg (march 19th.) .5mg(April 19th)
.4mg(April 27th)
.2 (June 27th)

0mg.  done taper at beginning of August.

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Hi Steely, welcome aboard!!!

Paxil start September 2003 due to Fluoroquinolone adverse reaction that I wish doc. knew what it was. 10mg. most of the time with a few short runs of 20mg. FAST tapered 3 times and finally hit poop out or a reaction to nsaid's in Nov.2013. Started a 10% taper Jan. 2014 and have been ok until Sept 14 and went through a short hell. Now plodding through and looking for the light with unrelenting insomnia and pain, fog, loss of interests....<p>12/20/14 - .8mg.

1/01/15 - .75 mg.

1/15/15 - .42 mg. better sleep now, hope it continues...

2/11-15 - .25 mg. doing really good!! 2 weeks feel 85% of old me!

3/17/15 .14 mg. Knee pain bad!

4/07/15 .05 mg. this is so small now that I am estimating and just licking it off palm small as a "." 

4/13/15 NOTHING !!!! Took my last little micro dose on 4/12/15. 

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Hello Steely and welcome to SA!

That's so great that your down to 4.5 from 30 of the remeron That is quite an accomplishment!

I look forward to reading your upcoming posts.

Glad your here,

Tgirl

April 2014 remeron 45mg.

June 2014 abilify 2.5 remeron wasn't working so abilify was then added

September 2014 woke up with anxiety x 100!!!!

Pdoc then took me from 45 to 7.5 within a month and took abilify from 2.5 to 0

Currently

Remeron 7.5

Vitamin d 5,000 iu taking for about 3 years

October 2014 added fish oil/omega 3 1000 mg per day

Levothyroxitine 100 10 years or so

Dec 2014 started tapering 10% every 10 days-no problems.

August 2015 down to 0.1 mg

Woke up with severe anxiety-sleep issues-racing thoughts-depression. 9/9/15 up dose 1 mg.

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I hope this is the way to go about replying to posts, so here goes.

 

So happy to receive all of the mails from old and new friends, and the realisation that people do not hold me resposible for the

closure of PP.  Never my intent, and not in my nature, just thought I was 'sticking up' for someone.  And seriously, I did not send any PM's to the moderators at PP, everything I said, I said up front on the Board.  Only seemed fair.  Nothing was secret.   

 

Thank you everyone for getting back to me and I'm sorry that I became the catalyst for the closure of PP.  I was 'happy' to drop, but believe that other members should have been given due notice that the site was closing.   

 

I appreciate all that PP has taught me, and understand as well that it must be a very demanding and tiring task, but no kid that experience has messed with my head and I'm still not over it.  Very depressed, foetal-like on lounge.  Hearing back from you all has helped heaps and I feel like crying.  As the days go by I am improving. 

 

I won't be so dismal in future, I hope

 

That was dead-set funny Marka, think I'll wander down the billabong now and brew that perfect cuppa.   

Prescribed 30mg Mirtazapine approximately 10 years ago.  PTSD 

 

C/T 50% of dose - dreadful, hellish

Begin to reduce by 10% every 3-6 weeks

now:

5.11.14 4.50mg - going to wait a bit longer

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Hi Steeley!  I'm glad you found your way here.  No, you were not the reason PP closed; it had been dysfunctional for some time.  But I'm sorry for all the stress it caused you.

Paxil 20mg 1994-2005
Tried to quit twice, finally did it on my 3rd attempt in 2005.

I went from 20mg to zero in about four months, believing at the time that it was a reasonable taper.  It wasn't.  I suffered mostly emotional symptoms: frequent episodes of "anxious depression" lasting for about 17 months before it got noticeably better.

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Thanks for that Babs, really needed to hear those words.  Everyone has been wonderful.

Prescribed 30mg Mirtazapine approximately 10 years ago.  PTSD 

 

C/T 50% of dose - dreadful, hellish

Begin to reduce by 10% every 3-6 weeks

now:

5.11.14 4.50mg - going to wait a bit longer

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You can find Mattage; JMarie' Aberdeen; CaperJackie; BrassMonkey; Babs; Songbird;  and Junior by looking for their names in the introductions/update forum.  Oh!  JMarie is known as Ladybug here.

 

 

Thank you, Petu! Hate to confuse everyone, but I actually started an account here a few years ago and just didn't use the same name.

 

So glad you found your way here, Steeley! I was worried about you. Looks like almost everyone is here, except for GrandmaD. Hope she shows up soon. I think someone mentioned she knows about the site.

 

Oh, and I don't think anyone blames you for PP closing. I certainly don't. Like Babs said, this has been coming for a long time now. No matter what Scotty said, it WAS a kind and brave thing you did sticking up for Cressida, and you were not the only one. If sticking up for someone who we feel is being slighted is wrong, then I don't want to be right lol.

a.k.a JMarie

Paxil since Mar.1998

2006-2007:40-20mg
2009: 20mg to 14mg 2010: 14mg to 10.5mg 2011: 10.5 to 7.6mg  2012: 7.5 to 6.8mg

2013: 6.7-6.3mg 2014: 6.2mg-5.8mg 2015: 5.7 to 5.15mg 2016: 5.1-4.6mg

1/19/17: 4.5mg 3/17/17: 4.4mg

6/15/17: 4.35mg 8/10/17: 4.3mg

1/29/18: 4.1mg 5/07/18: 4.0mg

7/31/18: 3.9mg

 

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Yay, Steeley is here at last!  We've all been waiting to see you!

2001–2002 paroxetine

2003  citalopram

2004-2008  paroxetine (various failed tapers) 
2008  paroxetine slow taper down to

2016  Aug off paroxetine
2016  citalopram May 20mg  Oct 15mg … slow taper down
2018  citalopram 13 Feb 4.6mg 15 Mar 4.4mg 29 Apr 4.2mg 6 Jul 4.1mg 17 Aug 4.0mg  18 Nov 3.8mg
2019  15 Mar 3.6mg  21 May 3.4mg  26 Dec 3.2mg 

2020  19 Feb 3.0mg 19 Jul 2.9mg 16 Sep 2.8mg 25 Oct 2.7mg 23 Oct 2.6mg 24 Dec 2.5mg

2021   29 Aug 2.4mg   15 Nov 2.3mg

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Now is the time to curl up on the couch and watch the cricket.  I was in bed when the game started so I missed Warner's wicket.  I believe he copped a beauty.

 

I actually feel strange.  I'm usually AT the cricket on Boxing Day.  Ahh well.  Going tomorrow :)

Personal history of GAD and 4 melancholic depressive episodes - two treated with Amityptline

Family history of Bipolar Disorder - goes back at least 3 generations

Adult son with autism, ADHD, intellectual disability and Bipolar II

Put on Aropax / Paxil in July 1997 for anther episode.  Decision to stay on it - worst decision of my life.

Began to poop out in late 2008. Switched to Lexapro March 2009.  Made me suicidal.  Tried Cymbalta for 19 days. Horrible w/d.

Found PP and RI'd Aropax at about the same time - August 2009.  Began slow taper in 2010. Crashed in 13-11mg range in mid 2013.  Switched to Citalopram 21 Oct 2013 in an attempt to stabilise.

 

There are things that are known, and things that are unknown; in between are doors - Anonymous

 

https://itunes.apple.com/au/book/longing-for-life/id958423649  My book about my unsuccessful journey through IVF

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Oh Junior,

 

So good to see your face again, and I missed Warner's 'out for a duck' too, foetal on lounge going for the Golden Duck unable

to raise my bat. 

 

I did a really stupid thing following the closure of PP.  I jumped off my 4.5 and just thought "to hell with it", I can't stand it anymore.  Needless to say 3 days later I was back in WD NotNormal.  Awful, and probably a self destruct impulse, feeling that I had wrecked it for everyone who relied on that site as their only means of support.

 

I have re-instated but still not stable, deep depression and the rest.

 

Have a great day at the cricket, wish I could be there.

 

steeley

Prescribed 30mg Mirtazapine approximately 10 years ago.  PTSD 

 

C/T 50% of dose - dreadful, hellish

Begin to reduce by 10% every 3-6 weeks

now:

5.11.14 4.50mg - going to wait a bit longer

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You were distraught so you reaction is understandable.  Let's just hope that you can stabilise again quickly.

 

I'm not sleeping at the moment so let's also hope I sleep well tonight so I can ENJOY tomorrow.  I'll be taking my sombrero hat so I can always have a siesta if I don't. LOL!

Personal history of GAD and 4 melancholic depressive episodes - two treated with Amityptline

Family history of Bipolar Disorder - goes back at least 3 generations

Adult son with autism, ADHD, intellectual disability and Bipolar II

Put on Aropax / Paxil in July 1997 for anther episode.  Decision to stay on it - worst decision of my life.

Began to poop out in late 2008. Switched to Lexapro March 2009.  Made me suicidal.  Tried Cymbalta for 19 days. Horrible w/d.

Found PP and RI'd Aropax at about the same time - August 2009.  Began slow taper in 2010. Crashed in 13-11mg range in mid 2013.  Switched to Citalopram 21 Oct 2013 in an attempt to stabilise.

 

There are things that are known, and things that are unknown; in between are doors - Anonymous

 

https://itunes.apple.com/au/book/longing-for-life/id958423649  My book about my unsuccessful journey through IVF

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Dear Songbird, 

 

Thank you so for your support.  This thing has really knocked me for six, but I will get better and will continue to bat.

 

In a frenzy of depression I jumped of my 4.5 and 3 days later went into WD.  I've re-instated but still not stable.  It will happen.

 

Thanks for being there.

 

steeley

Prescribed 30mg Mirtazapine approximately 10 years ago.  PTSD 

 

C/T 50% of dose - dreadful, hellish

Begin to reduce by 10% every 3-6 weeks

now:

5.11.14 4.50mg - going to wait a bit longer

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Now is the time to curl up on the couch and watch the cricket.  I was in bed when the game started so I missed Warner's wicket.  I believe he copped a beauty.

 

I actually feel strange.  I'm usually AT the cricket on Boxing Day.  Ahh well.  Going tomorrow :)

I usually go day 1 but am going tomorrow as well. On the couch watching as we speak

 

 

Steeley, glad you found us and your friends. I am in the throws of withdrawal just having dropped down recently. I empathise. Try not to be hard on yourself. The PP stuff has obviously been distressing and disturbing but you have certainly been given a strong message from your fellow PPers that it wasn't your fault.

 

Glad you reinstated, not much point castigating yourself for your decision to jump off, just look forward to tapering slowly with the support of a community.

 

Take care

 

Dalsaan

Please note - I am not a medical practitioner and I do not give medical advice. I offer an opinion based on my own experiences, reading and discussion with others.On Effexor for 2 months at the start of 2005. Had extreme insomnia as an adverse reaction. Changed to mirtazapine. Have been trying to get off since mid 2008 with numerous failures including CTs and slow (but not slow enough tapers)Have slow tapered at 10 per cent or less for years. I have liquid mirtazapine made at a compounding chemist.

Was on 1.6 ml as at 19 March 2014.

Dropped to 1.5 ml 7 June 2014. Dropped to 1.4 in about September.

Dropped to 1.3 on 20 December 2014. Dropped to 1.2 in mid Jan 2015.

Dropped to 1 ml in late Feb 2015. I think my old medication had run out of puff so I tried 1ml when I got the new stuff and it seems to be going ok. Sleep has been good over the last week (as of 13/3/15).

Dropped to 1/2 ml 14/11/15 Fatigue still there as are memory and cognition problems. Sleep is patchy but liveable compared to what it has been in the past.

 

DRUG FREE - as at 1st May 2017

 

>My intro post is here - http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/2250-dalsaan

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How long ago did you re-instate Steeley? It's been a few weeks for me, but I'm good now.

Put on Prothiaden for severe depression in 1989.  Recovered.   Prescribed Paxil for another bout of depression around 2000.   Have been trying to taper ever since but always crash about 2 months after getting to zero.   Because of the crashes, for years I thought that there was something wrong with me.   Then found that the crashes were simply withdrawal.   Now following a maximum of a 10% reduction every month or so and ready to slow down any time I feel any symptoms whatsoever.  Feeling good:).

7th Jan 15 - 3.6mg

28th Jan 15 - 3.2mg

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Steely, I hope you stabilize soon. What were you thinking,lol???

Yes you were very brave standing up for Cressida. It was an uncertain environment to do that in, and thats why it was brave. Good for you, and dont even worry about what happened after, it was on its way...(as i mentioned in the PP is closing thread). 

Im sorry you had a probably kind of crappy Christmas but keep tapering and hang in there. theres always next year. Right now we just need to keep moving one step at a time. We'll get there! glad youre here!

2 Timothy 1-7 For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.

Effexor 75mg to 262.5mg 2005-2010 for post partum depression

Started having poop out mid 2010, also switched generic brands, then crashed in Dec 2010 (anxiety/ "terror", intense DR, anhedonia, suicidal ideation, chills, insomnia, horrible intrusive thoughts, disorientation, ect)
Rapid "tapered" from 262.5mg Effexor in 3 months

Tried Celexa,Cipralex, then Paxil to deal with wd(this switching made things worse and added akathesia)

Found online support and started tapering Paxil 7 months after quitting Effexor (at this point was having small windows).

Paxil taper: dropped 10% every 4-8 weeks

Year 1 October 2011 to Nov 2012 20mg to 10mg

Year 2 March 2013 to Feb 2014 10mg to 4mg

Year 3 April 2014 to May 2015 4mg to 1.1mg

Year 4 June 2015 1.1mg , dropping by 10% until .5mg, after then dropped by 0.1mg every 5 weeks until 0.1mg.

Finished! Official last dose of 0.1mg on June 15/16

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Hey Steeley--  I posted a bit welcome this morning, but can't find it anywhere, so just wanted to make sure you got one from me.  I have been worried about you, I'm so glad you made it over here okay.  I read about your oops on another thread, things should settle out pretty quickly.  Don't add the secondary fear by dwelling on it.

 

((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))))))))))))))))

20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013.

Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks.  The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better.

Final Dose 0.016mg.     Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017

 

"It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general."  Stephen Hawking

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Hi Steeley, glad to see you here!

1998- Began taking 20 mg. of Paxil for homesickness 2001-CT and crash/hospitalized 1 week for anxiety. Tried quitting, changing to other ADs, gave up. 2014 -Weaned @ 10% every 4 weeks. Latest 5-14 11.7 mg., 6-14 10.5 mg., 8-21 9.5 mg., 9-17 7.7 mg.,10-14 6.9 mg., 11-14 6.2 mg., 12-14 5.6 mg., 1-15 5.0 mg. 2-15 4.5 mg. (miscalculated may actually be 3.3), up-dosed to 3.7 3-17-15. Hydroxyzine HCl 25 mg. as needed (antihistamine) for anxiety.

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Now is the time to curl up on the couch and watch the cricket.  I was in bed when the game started so I missed Warner's wicket.  I believe he copped a beauty.

 

I actually feel strange.  I'm usually AT the cricket on Boxing Day.  Ahh well.  Going tomorrow :)

I usually go day 1 but am going tomorrow as well. On the couch watching as we speak

 

 

 

Just printing off my tickets now. Bay 22 L1 Southern Stand.  Where are you sitting?

 

Steeley - look for the old woman, just to the right of the sightscreen, southern stand end, wearing a Sombrero.  She will probably be asleep! LOL

Personal history of GAD and 4 melancholic depressive episodes - two treated with Amityptline

Family history of Bipolar Disorder - goes back at least 3 generations

Adult son with autism, ADHD, intellectual disability and Bipolar II

Put on Aropax / Paxil in July 1997 for anther episode.  Decision to stay on it - worst decision of my life.

Began to poop out in late 2008. Switched to Lexapro March 2009.  Made me suicidal.  Tried Cymbalta for 19 days. Horrible w/d.

Found PP and RI'd Aropax at about the same time - August 2009.  Began slow taper in 2010. Crashed in 13-11mg range in mid 2013.  Switched to Citalopram 21 Oct 2013 in an attempt to stabilise.

 

There are things that are known, and things that are unknown; in between are doors - Anonymous

 

https://itunes.apple.com/au/book/longing-for-life/id958423649  My book about my unsuccessful journey through IVF

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I hope you stabilize soon, Steeley.  I certainly felt in shock at the closure of PP and I haven't been in withdrawal for years, so I know it's gotta be really hard on those who are.  You've got a lot of people here pulling for you.

Paxil 20mg 1994-2005
Tried to quit twice, finally did it on my 3rd attempt in 2005.

I went from 20mg to zero in about four months, believing at the time that it was a reasonable taper.  It wasn't.  I suffered mostly emotional symptoms: frequent episodes of "anxious depression" lasting for about 17 months before it got noticeably better.

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I reinstated 2 days ago Ever.  It took three days to throw me back into WD so hope as the days pass I will become more stable. 

 

Thanks too Tom, I was thinking about you and thought you might have given me the flick, so really good to hear from you and you're right to say not to add a secondary by dwelling on it.  I promise I'm working on it.

 

Hang on there, I can see a woman in the stands wearing a sombrero and she's sleeping......could that be Junior, doesn't look that old to me?  I know you need your sleep, but surely you got to see Smith take that six?  (Don't know how to work the smilies, so big smile). 

 

I thank EVERYONE for their support, without which I would still be foetal.  Now back to the MCG.  That's the Melbourne Cricket Ground for those not familiar.  You fella's are the best.      

Prescribed 30mg Mirtazapine approximately 10 years ago.  PTSD 

 

C/T 50% of dose - dreadful, hellish

Begin to reduce by 10% every 3-6 weeks

now:

5.11.14 4.50mg - going to wait a bit longer

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It's good that you reinstated quickly, that will be a big help in restabilising quickly.

2001–2002 paroxetine

2003  citalopram

2004-2008  paroxetine (various failed tapers) 
2008  paroxetine slow taper down to

2016  Aug off paroxetine
2016  citalopram May 20mg  Oct 15mg … slow taper down
2018  citalopram 13 Feb 4.6mg 15 Mar 4.4mg 29 Apr 4.2mg 6 Jul 4.1mg 17 Aug 4.0mg  18 Nov 3.8mg
2019  15 Mar 3.6mg  21 May 3.4mg  26 Dec 3.2mg 

2020  19 Feb 3.0mg 19 Jul 2.9mg 16 Sep 2.8mg 25 Oct 2.7mg 23 Oct 2.6mg 24 Dec 2.5mg

2021   29 Aug 2.4mg   15 Nov 2.3mg

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Hello Sleely,

I hope your reinstatement works out.

I too am on remeron. 7.5 and really scared.

We're you doing the 10% drops once per month before you quit altogether?

How has it been for you each drop?

Thank you,

Tgirl

April 2014 remeron 45mg.

June 2014 abilify 2.5 remeron wasn't working so abilify was then added

September 2014 woke up with anxiety x 100!!!!

Pdoc then took me from 45 to 7.5 within a month and took abilify from 2.5 to 0

Currently

Remeron 7.5

Vitamin d 5,000 iu taking for about 3 years

October 2014 added fish oil/omega 3 1000 mg per day

Levothyroxitine 100 10 years or so

Dec 2014 started tapering 10% every 10 days-no problems.

August 2015 down to 0.1 mg

Woke up with severe anxiety-sleep issues-racing thoughts-depression. 9/9/15 up dose 1 mg.

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Hey steely

Sorry to hear about all the drama on the other site and welcome.

I'm at 3.6 mg of mirtazapine and it's been really bad since getting under 4 mg just wanted to warn you really you've got to take it so slowly the lower you get.. you probably know this already tho! I'm going to hold at this dose for a few months so I can stabilize.

 

Also t girl I did the same as you and had a big cut first of all and found that the first big drop took longest to recover from. Then when I started slow small drops they were not as bad until I got to under 4 mg hope that helps I know everyone is different tho

 

Lolly

Feb 2013 - started Mirtazapine 15 mg have CFS /ME

did 6 months of tapering to 0 mg

2 months drug Free awful withdrawal

May 2014 reinstated at 6 mg

August 2014 - 5 mg. October 2014 - 4 mg. November - 3.8 mg

December - 3.6 mg. Jan upped to 3.8 holding for a while

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Hi, Steely, glad you made it here!  PP had gotten quite mean in the last while...too bad, but, things don't last forever.  It saved my life in the beginning....then got weird after some years.  Everyone here is really kind and helpful.

 

Good luck on your re-stable-izing.  I can understand your frustration at the time.  You'll be Okay though!

KittyQ

CT off paxil-April 2009

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Hi Steeley--

 

Welcome to SA.

 

I'm impressed by the love and camaraderie of the new "gang" here and I think y'all will be a great addition to our forum. (Even if I can't understand the language you speak sometimes...kind of looks like English, only with different words ;-)

 

Hopefully you'll recover from this wobble fairly fast. Take care of yourself, reduce stress, be gentle.

 

--Rhi

Started on Prozac and Xanax in 1992 for PTSD after an assault. One drug led to more, the usual story. Got sicker and sicker, but believed I needed the drugs for my "underlying disease". Long story...lost everything. Life savings, home, physical and mental health, relationships, friendships, ability to work, everything. Amitryptiline, Prozac, bupropion, buspirone, flurazepam, diazepam, alprazolam, Paxil, citalopram, lamotrigine, gabapentin...probably more I've forgotten. 

Started multidrug taper in Feb 2010.  Doing a very slow microtaper, down to low doses now and feeling SO much better, getting my old personality and my brain back! Able to work full time, have a full social life, and cope with stress better than ever. Not perfect, but much better. After 23 lost years. Big Pharma has a lot to answer for. And "medicine for profit" is just not a great idea.

 

Feb 15 2010:  300 mg Neurontin  200 Lamictal   10 Celexa      0.65 Xanax   and 5 mg Ambien 

Feb 10 2014:   62 Lamictal    1.1 Celexa         0.135 Xanax    1.8 Valium

Feb 10 2015:   50 Lamictal      0.875 Celexa    0.11 Xanax      1.5 Valium

Feb 15 2016:   47.5 Lamictal   0.75 Celexa      0.0875 Xanax    1.42 Valium    

2/12/20             12                       0.045               0.007                   1 

May 2021            7                       0.01                  0.0037                1

Feb 2022            6                      0!!!                     0.00167               0.98                2.5 mg Ambien

Oct 2022       4.5 mg Lamictal    (off Celexa, off Xanax)   0.95 Valium    Ambien, 1/4 to 1/2 of a 5 mg tablet 

 

I'm not a doctor. Any advice I give is just my civilian opinion.

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Even if I can't understand the language you speak sometimes...kind of looks like English, only with different words ;-)

Do we? Oh dear lol. We'll have to watch out for that and translate. And Rhi - I know it's been said before, but just have to thank everyone here yet again for welcoming us here. Soooo grateful. XXXX

Put on Prothiaden for severe depression in 1989.  Recovered.   Prescribed Paxil for another bout of depression around 2000.   Have been trying to taper ever since but always crash about 2 months after getting to zero.   Because of the crashes, for years I thought that there was something wrong with me.   Then found that the crashes were simply withdrawal.   Now following a maximum of a 10% reduction every month or so and ready to slow down any time I feel any symptoms whatsoever.  Feeling good:).

7th Jan 15 - 3.6mg

28th Jan 15 - 3.2mg

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