Member cymbaltawithdrawal5600 Posted December 26, 2014 Member Share Posted December 26, 2014 More Facebook groups: Benzodiazepine Recovery run by Jana Brown Benzo & Psych Med (BPM) Withdrawal Group run by Nick Cole (a member of SA) Protracted Withdrawal Syndrome from Benzodiazepines and Anti Depressants Benzo Beware Restrict Benzodiazepines Most of these groups are private. Use Search on Facebook to find, then send a message to the admin requesting permission to join. From a contact on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/notes/benzodiazepine-benzo-withdrawal-support-group/aleishas-list-of-benzo-info-and-support-links/503596003032718 with permission. Aleisha's List of Benzo Info and Support Links By Aleisha Phillips on Monday, March 25, 2013 at 8:02am We do not endorse the following links or groups as we do not know how they operate. It is good to have resources & always do your own research!! Knowledge is power! Thank you Aleisha Phillips for all your hard work! www.bcnc.org.uk – benzo info (and the best place to START!) www.beyondmeds.com – Benzo Withdrawal Syndrome 101 www.benzosupport.org www.kipcentral.wordpress.com – benzo blog http://benzowithdrawalsyndrome.wordpress.com – BWS blog http://www.dailycamera.com/features/ci_22850765/matt-samet-rock-climbing-author-death-grip-climbers-escape-from-benzo-madness - survival story, Matt Samet (rock-climber, wrote a book about his experience called “Death Grip” http://medipub.blogspot.com/2011/10/difference-between-sedative-and.html - understanding sedatives/tranquilizers/benzos http://www.non-benzodiazepines.org.uk – T.R.A.P. – The Tranquilizers Recovery and Awareness Place http://thebrain.mcgill.ca/flash/i/i_03/i_03_m/i_03_m_par/i_03_m_par_benzodiazepines.html understanding benzos effect on the brain http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/7841856 - journal abstract about a study on Benzo Withdrawal Syndrome http://www.bmj.com/content/345/bmj.e6231 - article in the British Medical Journal about the risk of dementia from long-term benzo use http://www.benzowise.com – benzo info http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Post-acute-withdrawal_syndrome - entry about Benzo Withdrawal Syndrome (called Post-Acute-Withdrawal-Syndrome…which applies to more than just benzos) http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/j.1360-0443.1994.tb03743.x/abstract - journal abstract about a study on BWS (science-based evidence validating BWS) http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/j.1600-0447.1998.tb05973.x/abstract - journal abstract about a study of BWS and its management (science-based evidence validating BWS) http://recovery-road.org/ - GREAT source of information for sufferers, survivors, family, doctors, therapists … anyone who is touched by BWS. EFT – Emotional Freedom Technique Research http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/invisible-wounds/201211/long-road-back-part-ii - story of a Ph.D. Psychologist who has successfully used EFT on soldiers with PTSD and her results Here you go... Jenifer Leigh. Here are several links for you to try for more personalized support on benzo withdrawal. I know you mentioned you tried some but there are a lot on these lists. You may very well find a suitable one that can give you the information you are seeking. What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878 July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site. Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey. Link to comment
hiphopanonymous Posted December 28, 2014 Author Share Posted December 28, 2014 So i did start to stabilize today. Had a pretty gnarly window the whole day. Think im ganna hold for a week and then reevaluate to work on getting off the rest of the pheno. Slowly...... im so impatient probably need to wait seversl months before attempting the gabapentin. Thankd everyone. This has been a rough ride. People in my life have no clue. Current meds ativan 2.5mg 3x a day gabapentin 300mg 3x a day methadone down to 38 from 40mg once a day. have tried holding. ...switching to kpin.... valium. .. updosing mskes worse all damage lies underneath all meds not in pharmocologicalwd but am in worse shape than was cold turkey symptoms never got better reinstatement only worse now in impossible web hep c toxic neurons very possible lyme kindled been reinstated for a year and symptoms and psuchological torment are so severe that i csnnot taper anything body and ming failing immune problems thyroid every type of psin photosensitive acusis psychotic terror and confusion cannot control actions cannot lsy down but cant sit i nod and awake in terror tormen every cell exploding shaking visual disturbances march agressively in place whimpering meds are killing me but cant taper off because severe symptoms waves getting worse and worse no matter what i pull my hair out need to run to er but cant help every med makes me worse sever psychotic akathisia feel like neurotoxic i live alone cant take care of myself cannot taper for years cuz im already past my threshold also herpes 1 Epstein barr maybe citamegalovirus hep c very high liver enzymes severe ocd agorifobia burning skin so so so sick piain that is unexplainable very possible lyme this is not all withdrawals im technically not even in withdrawal because higher dosed dont help makes worse cant take care to be alone my brain flips in ways that only someone being tormented in hell could understand i cant seem to find anyone to relate too cuz everyone is able to do slow tsper but im getting rapidly worse whether tspering or not but tapering i not in safe position these drugs can cause permanent damage i need off but the trauma and twisted torment im not true psychosis but i have irrational beliefs can no longer be held or touched lose grip the torment and trauma are burning me alive time is backward. Dont know what to do been looking for a year. Waves getting more more intense have to eat standing up cant breathe put sentences together lyphnode swelling whole outer neck see shadows last 6 months rapid decline every day help me. Please Link to comment
hiphopanonymous Posted December 28, 2014 Author Share Posted December 28, 2014 Wow thank you for all those links. It feels good to be reaching out and taking action in my recovery Current meds ativan 2.5mg 3x a day gabapentin 300mg 3x a day methadone down to 38 from 40mg once a day. have tried holding. ...switching to kpin.... valium. .. updosing mskes worse all damage lies underneath all meds not in pharmocologicalwd but am in worse shape than was cold turkey symptoms never got better reinstatement only worse now in impossible web hep c toxic neurons very possible lyme kindled been reinstated for a year and symptoms and psuchological torment are so severe that i csnnot taper anything body and ming failing immune problems thyroid every type of psin photosensitive acusis psychotic terror and confusion cannot control actions cannot lsy down but cant sit i nod and awake in terror tormen every cell exploding shaking visual disturbances march agressively in place whimpering meds are killing me but cant taper off because severe symptoms waves getting worse and worse no matter what i pull my hair out need to run to er but cant help every med makes me worse sever psychotic akathisia feel like neurotoxic i live alone cant take care of myself cannot taper for years cuz im already past my threshold also herpes 1 Epstein barr maybe citamegalovirus hep c very high liver enzymes severe ocd agorifobia burning skin so so so sick piain that is unexplainable very possible lyme this is not all withdrawals im technically not even in withdrawal because higher dosed dont help makes worse cant take care to be alone my brain flips in ways that only someone being tormented in hell could understand i cant seem to find anyone to relate too cuz everyone is able to do slow tsper but im getting rapidly worse whether tspering or not but tapering i not in safe position these drugs can cause permanent damage i need off but the trauma and twisted torment im not true psychosis but i have irrational beliefs can no longer be held or touched lose grip the torment and trauma are burning me alive time is backward. Dont know what to do been looking for a year. Waves getting more more intense have to eat standing up cant breathe put sentences together lyphnode swelling whole outer neck see shadows last 6 months rapid decline every day help me. Please Link to comment
Member cymbaltawithdrawal5600 Posted December 28, 2014 Member Share Posted December 28, 2014 So i did start to stabilize today. Had a pretty gnarly window the whole day. surfer? I lived in CA for 16 years. Just an amateur body surfer... Think im ganna hold for a week and then reevaluate to work on getting off the rest of the pheno. Slowly...... im so impatient probably need to wait seversl months before attempting the gabapentin. Thankd everyone. This has been a rough ride. People in my life have no clue. You may need to think about holding for several months to let your nervous system stabilize from all of the med changes it has had. Don't be in a rush, you'll just prolong your recovery and be miserable at the same time. Everyone is impatient, you have to work to control it. You can do it. What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878 July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site. Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey. Link to comment
hiphopanonymous Posted December 28, 2014 Author Share Posted December 28, 2014 Yes California. Live right on the beach. I think i have come to accept that ths gabapentin will have to wait a good while but im kinda in a pickle with the pheno because i have had issues with it in the past inducing pretty severe acute hepatitis. And i have hep c. So i need to be somewhamore aggressive withe the taper. Though i am down to 15 mg from much higher doses so hopefully that wont happen again although i have been havin some liver area pain but its hard to tell if its from gas or benzo belly. I hope ill know when the right time to taper is because my cns is so severly damaged its not easy telling when the right time is. Does anyone know how far out a seizure from benzo withdrawal can occur? Is six weeks safe Current meds ativan 2.5mg 3x a day gabapentin 300mg 3x a day methadone down to 38 from 40mg once a day. have tried holding. ...switching to kpin.... valium. .. updosing mskes worse all damage lies underneath all meds not in pharmocologicalwd but am in worse shape than was cold turkey symptoms never got better reinstatement only worse now in impossible web hep c toxic neurons very possible lyme kindled been reinstated for a year and symptoms and psuchological torment are so severe that i csnnot taper anything body and ming failing immune problems thyroid every type of psin photosensitive acusis psychotic terror and confusion cannot control actions cannot lsy down but cant sit i nod and awake in terror tormen every cell exploding shaking visual disturbances march agressively in place whimpering meds are killing me but cant taper off because severe symptoms waves getting worse and worse no matter what i pull my hair out need to run to er but cant help every med makes me worse sever psychotic akathisia feel like neurotoxic i live alone cant take care of myself cannot taper for years cuz im already past my threshold also herpes 1 Epstein barr maybe citamegalovirus hep c very high liver enzymes severe ocd agorifobia burning skin so so so sick piain that is unexplainable very possible lyme this is not all withdrawals im technically not even in withdrawal because higher dosed dont help makes worse cant take care to be alone my brain flips in ways that only someone being tormented in hell could understand i cant seem to find anyone to relate too cuz everyone is able to do slow tsper but im getting rapidly worse whether tspering or not but tapering i not in safe position these drugs can cause permanent damage i need off but the trauma and twisted torment im not true psychosis but i have irrational beliefs can no longer be held or touched lose grip the torment and trauma are burning me alive time is backward. Dont know what to do been looking for a year. Waves getting more more intense have to eat standing up cant breathe put sentences together lyphnode swelling whole outer neck see shadows last 6 months rapid decline every day help me. Please Link to comment
Administrator Altostrata Posted January 1, 2015 Administrator Share Posted January 1, 2015 hiphop, did you contact Dr. Shipko? Has the pain and burning stopped? I'm worried about your liver. The pheno plus other drugs may not be good for it. This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner. "It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein All postings © copyrighted. Link to comment
hiphopanonymous Posted January 1, 2015 Author Share Posted January 1, 2015 Hey alto. No havent contacted him yet but did look him up. Looks very reputable. I have county insurrance so it might be an issue. The burning and pain went away for 48 hours and then came back. Now its mostly freezing pain. Like my body is covered in vics vapor rub its very uncomfortable. But ive been talking to some BB member s and they almost unanymously agree it is not the gabapentin. I know i need to do one med at a time and gabap does not affect the liver the pheno does and im getting ready to drop a dose here in the next few days if things stay stable. Current meds ativan 2.5mg 3x a day gabapentin 300mg 3x a day methadone down to 38 from 40mg once a day. have tried holding. ...switching to kpin.... valium. .. updosing mskes worse all damage lies underneath all meds not in pharmocologicalwd but am in worse shape than was cold turkey symptoms never got better reinstatement only worse now in impossible web hep c toxic neurons very possible lyme kindled been reinstated for a year and symptoms and psuchological torment are so severe that i csnnot taper anything body and ming failing immune problems thyroid every type of psin photosensitive acusis psychotic terror and confusion cannot control actions cannot lsy down but cant sit i nod and awake in terror tormen every cell exploding shaking visual disturbances march agressively in place whimpering meds are killing me but cant taper off because severe symptoms waves getting worse and worse no matter what i pull my hair out need to run to er but cant help every med makes me worse sever psychotic akathisia feel like neurotoxic i live alone cant take care of myself cannot taper for years cuz im already past my threshold also herpes 1 Epstein barr maybe citamegalovirus hep c very high liver enzymes severe ocd agorifobia burning skin so so so sick piain that is unexplainable very possible lyme this is not all withdrawals im technically not even in withdrawal because higher dosed dont help makes worse cant take care to be alone my brain flips in ways that only someone being tormented in hell could understand i cant seem to find anyone to relate too cuz everyone is able to do slow tsper but im getting rapidly worse whether tspering or not but tapering i not in safe position these drugs can cause permanent damage i need off but the trauma and twisted torment im not true psychosis but i have irrational beliefs can no longer be held or touched lose grip the torment and trauma are burning me alive time is backward. Dont know what to do been looking for a year. Waves getting more more intense have to eat standing up cant breathe put sentences together lyphnode swelling whole outer neck see shadows last 6 months rapid decline every day help me. Please Link to comment
Administrator Altostrata Posted January 7, 2015 Administrator Share Posted January 7, 2015 I truly think you should talk to Dr. Shipko, given your liver problems and phenobarbitol. This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner. "It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein All postings © copyrighted. Link to comment
hiphopanonymous Posted April 12, 2015 Author Share Posted April 12, 2015 Hi peep havent been on in awhile so ive been off benzos for 5 months and off phenobarbital for 3 months. Im still on 900mg of Gabapentin. Nothing has gotten better. Im shaking twitching severe muscle pain ans weakness hissing in ears feel like i have the flu nauseous severe anxiety panic fear cant see straight blurry dp and dr nerve pain burning feet and hands feel like hot coals. Twisted psychotic thoughts and obssessions severe depression skin feels like i have roadrash over my whole body. Menthol feeling of skin hotflashes chills feel lije i need run to the er cuz im dying of several diseases.jumpy sounds hurt cant relax beain is hissing and buzzing. I feel psychotic. There are many more i cant think of. All these things seem to rotate. They are all benzo withdrawl. Symptoms but nothing has goten better and actually some thing have gotten worse. Im obsessed that the Gabapentin. Is somehow. Causing this or making it worse. Every research ive read says that Gabapentin. Does not attach to the same receptors as benzos that it is a calcium channel blocker. But could it be preventing me from healing from benzo withdrawl or am i just protracted. Im living in hell. Was having. A few windows where i felt better but now everything. Seems worse. Aggg the burning cant taper off the gaba cuz my symptom. Are already too severe. Whats going on? I need some help Current meds ativan 2.5mg 3x a day gabapentin 300mg 3x a day methadone down to 38 from 40mg once a day. have tried holding. ...switching to kpin.... valium. .. updosing mskes worse all damage lies underneath all meds not in pharmocologicalwd but am in worse shape than was cold turkey symptoms never got better reinstatement only worse now in impossible web hep c toxic neurons very possible lyme kindled been reinstated for a year and symptoms and psuchological torment are so severe that i csnnot taper anything body and ming failing immune problems thyroid every type of psin photosensitive acusis psychotic terror and confusion cannot control actions cannot lsy down but cant sit i nod and awake in terror tormen every cell exploding shaking visual disturbances march agressively in place whimpering meds are killing me but cant taper off because severe symptoms waves getting worse and worse no matter what i pull my hair out need to run to er but cant help every med makes me worse sever psychotic akathisia feel like neurotoxic i live alone cant take care of myself cannot taper for years cuz im already past my threshold also herpes 1 Epstein barr maybe citamegalovirus hep c very high liver enzymes severe ocd agorifobia burning skin so so so sick piain that is unexplainable very possible lyme this is not all withdrawals im technically not even in withdrawal because higher dosed dont help makes worse cant take care to be alone my brain flips in ways that only someone being tormented in hell could understand i cant seem to find anyone to relate too cuz everyone is able to do slow tsper but im getting rapidly worse whether tspering or not but tapering i not in safe position these drugs can cause permanent damage i need off but the trauma and twisted torment im not true psychosis but i have irrational beliefs can no longer be held or touched lose grip the torment and trauma are burning me alive time is backward. Dont know what to do been looking for a year. Waves getting more more intense have to eat standing up cant breathe put sentences together lyphnode swelling whole outer neck see shadows last 6 months rapid decline every day help me. Please Link to comment
Pugknows Posted April 12, 2015 Share Posted April 12, 2015 Hi Hiphop, so sorry you're in such hell. I CT 1500mg gabapentin, after botched up and down taper jumped at 700mg. I'm in hell too. I have one symptom, cortisol surging, which is the source of unbearable anxiety and all day panic attacks. My nausea from the gabapentin is gone. Back pain is gone. Anxiety remains in full force. Classic gabapentin WD. You could be in gabapentin tolerance and benzo WD at the same time. A mod will be along to help you. January 2012 - Prescribed 900mg gabapentin and 30mg Norco for lower lumber spinal stenosis pain. September 2013 - Spinal fusion surgery, 6 levels. Hospital ramped up meds 1500mg gabapentin, 100mg Norco, 80mg Oxycontin, 25mg Fentanyl patch. January 2014 - Sever nausea daily and with back pain every 4 hours. 2 trips to ER. First endoscopy found ulcer. Treated with Sucralfate and PPI. Second endo in May found no ulcers. Doctors said it was the opiates causing the nausea. CT'd Oxycontin, Fentanyl patch. July 2014 - Lost 48 lbs. due to not eating because of severe nausea. GP prescribed Prozac 20mg and Ativan 2mg prn. Tried for 4 days, quit. Two week followup GP said keep taking Prozac. 4 days, quit again. Ativan taken rarely prn for anxiety and appetite. August 2014 - Went to detox. Off opiates. Still nauseous, helmet head, drugged feeling. Doctor CT'd gabapentin. Ended up in ER. Found 2 gallstones. Gabapentin reinstated at 900mg. Tried botched up and down taper to get off Gabapentin. No tapering advice from doctor. Said to just CT again. September 2014 - Coded on table during gallbladder surgery. Developed liver biloma due to CPR by doctor. Had bile bulb inserted for 2 wks to drain. October 2014 - Gallbladder removed. Still nauseous, 3am cortisol surging, drugged helmet head, vertigo, breathlessness, whooshing head, heart palps. November 8th, 2014 - CT'd gabapentin suggested by family and 4 different doctors. Was told no withdrawal is associated with gabapentin. Have been in hell ever since. No windows, just one big tsunami every day with same symptoms for 4 months. December 26, 2014 - Found SA. At least I know I'm not insane. My family thinks I'm doing this to myself. Akathesia has become unbearable. March 10, 2015 - In absolute daily hell with no relief. Currently taking magnesium 200mg before bedtime. Link to comment
hiphopanonymous Posted April 12, 2015 Author Share Posted April 12, 2015 What is gabapentin tolerance? What does that feel like? I dont feel any different after i dose or with taking more. What side effects did you have from taking gaba? How long were you on it Current meds ativan 2.5mg 3x a day gabapentin 300mg 3x a day methadone down to 38 from 40mg once a day. have tried holding. ...switching to kpin.... valium. .. updosing mskes worse all damage lies underneath all meds not in pharmocologicalwd but am in worse shape than was cold turkey symptoms never got better reinstatement only worse now in impossible web hep c toxic neurons very possible lyme kindled been reinstated for a year and symptoms and psuchological torment are so severe that i csnnot taper anything body and ming failing immune problems thyroid every type of psin photosensitive acusis psychotic terror and confusion cannot control actions cannot lsy down but cant sit i nod and awake in terror tormen every cell exploding shaking visual disturbances march agressively in place whimpering meds are killing me but cant taper off because severe symptoms waves getting worse and worse no matter what i pull my hair out need to run to er but cant help every med makes me worse sever psychotic akathisia feel like neurotoxic i live alone cant take care of myself cannot taper for years cuz im already past my threshold also herpes 1 Epstein barr maybe citamegalovirus hep c very high liver enzymes severe ocd agorifobia burning skin so so so sick piain that is unexplainable very possible lyme this is not all withdrawals im technically not even in withdrawal because higher dosed dont help makes worse cant take care to be alone my brain flips in ways that only someone being tormented in hell could understand i cant seem to find anyone to relate too cuz everyone is able to do slow tsper but im getting rapidly worse whether tspering or not but tapering i not in safe position these drugs can cause permanent damage i need off but the trauma and twisted torment im not true psychosis but i have irrational beliefs can no longer be held or touched lose grip the torment and trauma are burning me alive time is backward. Dont know what to do been looking for a year. Waves getting more more intense have to eat standing up cant breathe put sentences together lyphnode swelling whole outer neck see shadows last 6 months rapid decline every day help me. Please Link to comment
Pugknows Posted April 12, 2015 Share Posted April 12, 2015 I'll PM you. January 2012 - Prescribed 900mg gabapentin and 30mg Norco for lower lumber spinal stenosis pain. September 2013 - Spinal fusion surgery, 6 levels. Hospital ramped up meds 1500mg gabapentin, 100mg Norco, 80mg Oxycontin, 25mg Fentanyl patch. January 2014 - Sever nausea daily and with back pain every 4 hours. 2 trips to ER. First endoscopy found ulcer. Treated with Sucralfate and PPI. Second endo in May found no ulcers. Doctors said it was the opiates causing the nausea. CT'd Oxycontin, Fentanyl patch. July 2014 - Lost 48 lbs. due to not eating because of severe nausea. GP prescribed Prozac 20mg and Ativan 2mg prn. Tried for 4 days, quit. Two week followup GP said keep taking Prozac. 4 days, quit again. Ativan taken rarely prn for anxiety and appetite. August 2014 - Went to detox. Off opiates. Still nauseous, helmet head, drugged feeling. Doctor CT'd gabapentin. Ended up in ER. Found 2 gallstones. Gabapentin reinstated at 900mg. Tried botched up and down taper to get off Gabapentin. No tapering advice from doctor. Said to just CT again. September 2014 - Coded on table during gallbladder surgery. Developed liver biloma due to CPR by doctor. Had bile bulb inserted for 2 wks to drain. October 2014 - Gallbladder removed. Still nauseous, 3am cortisol surging, drugged helmet head, vertigo, breathlessness, whooshing head, heart palps. November 8th, 2014 - CT'd gabapentin suggested by family and 4 different doctors. Was told no withdrawal is associated with gabapentin. Have been in hell ever since. No windows, just one big tsunami every day with same symptoms for 4 months. December 26, 2014 - Found SA. At least I know I'm not insane. My family thinks I'm doing this to myself. Akathesia has become unbearable. March 10, 2015 - In absolute daily hell with no relief. Currently taking magnesium 200mg before bedtime. Link to comment
Wondering Posted April 16, 2015 Share Posted April 16, 2015 What does too late to reinstate mean? Trazodone 150-300 nightly Ambien CR. 3-5 times a week Taking Klonopin crossing over to Valium started 6-25-15 Link to comment
Pugknows Posted April 16, 2015 Share Posted April 16, 2015 It gets iffier whether reinstatement will work the longer you wait. Over 2 months, your chances that it will work are 50-50. January 2012 - Prescribed 900mg gabapentin and 30mg Norco for lower lumber spinal stenosis pain. September 2013 - Spinal fusion surgery, 6 levels. Hospital ramped up meds 1500mg gabapentin, 100mg Norco, 80mg Oxycontin, 25mg Fentanyl patch. January 2014 - Sever nausea daily and with back pain every 4 hours. 2 trips to ER. First endoscopy found ulcer. Treated with Sucralfate and PPI. Second endo in May found no ulcers. Doctors said it was the opiates causing the nausea. CT'd Oxycontin, Fentanyl patch. July 2014 - Lost 48 lbs. due to not eating because of severe nausea. GP prescribed Prozac 20mg and Ativan 2mg prn. Tried for 4 days, quit. Two week followup GP said keep taking Prozac. 4 days, quit again. Ativan taken rarely prn for anxiety and appetite. August 2014 - Went to detox. Off opiates. Still nauseous, helmet head, drugged feeling. Doctor CT'd gabapentin. Ended up in ER. Found 2 gallstones. Gabapentin reinstated at 900mg. Tried botched up and down taper to get off Gabapentin. No tapering advice from doctor. Said to just CT again. September 2014 - Coded on table during gallbladder surgery. Developed liver biloma due to CPR by doctor. Had bile bulb inserted for 2 wks to drain. October 2014 - Gallbladder removed. Still nauseous, 3am cortisol surging, drugged helmet head, vertigo, breathlessness, whooshing head, heart palps. November 8th, 2014 - CT'd gabapentin suggested by family and 4 different doctors. Was told no withdrawal is associated with gabapentin. Have been in hell ever since. No windows, just one big tsunami every day with same symptoms for 4 months. December 26, 2014 - Found SA. At least I know I'm not insane. My family thinks I'm doing this to myself. Akathesia has become unbearable. March 10, 2015 - In absolute daily hell with no relief. Currently taking magnesium 200mg before bedtime. Link to comment
hiphopanonymous Posted April 16, 2015 Author Share Posted April 16, 2015 Any advice people on why my symptoms are geting worse and worse and no more windows? I am in no way stable physical and mental torture and think the Gabapentin is turned on me. Please help Current meds ativan 2.5mg 3x a day gabapentin 300mg 3x a day methadone down to 38 from 40mg once a day. have tried holding. ...switching to kpin.... valium. .. updosing mskes worse all damage lies underneath all meds not in pharmocologicalwd but am in worse shape than was cold turkey symptoms never got better reinstatement only worse now in impossible web hep c toxic neurons very possible lyme kindled been reinstated for a year and symptoms and psuchological torment are so severe that i csnnot taper anything body and ming failing immune problems thyroid every type of psin photosensitive acusis psychotic terror and confusion cannot control actions cannot lsy down but cant sit i nod and awake in terror tormen every cell exploding shaking visual disturbances march agressively in place whimpering meds are killing me but cant taper off because severe symptoms waves getting worse and worse no matter what i pull my hair out need to run to er but cant help every med makes me worse sever psychotic akathisia feel like neurotoxic i live alone cant take care of myself cannot taper for years cuz im already past my threshold also herpes 1 Epstein barr maybe citamegalovirus hep c very high liver enzymes severe ocd agorifobia burning skin so so so sick piain that is unexplainable very possible lyme this is not all withdrawals im technically not even in withdrawal because higher dosed dont help makes worse cant take care to be alone my brain flips in ways that only someone being tormented in hell could understand i cant seem to find anyone to relate too cuz everyone is able to do slow tsper but im getting rapidly worse whether tspering or not but tapering i not in safe position these drugs can cause permanent damage i need off but the trauma and twisted torment im not true psychosis but i have irrational beliefs can no longer be held or touched lose grip the torment and trauma are burning me alive time is backward. Dont know what to do been looking for a year. Waves getting more more intense have to eat standing up cant breathe put sentences together lyphnode swelling whole outer neck see shadows last 6 months rapid decline every day help me. Please Link to comment
Pugknows Posted April 16, 2015 Share Posted April 16, 2015 Hang in there, Hiphop. You'll get more windows soon. January 2012 - Prescribed 900mg gabapentin and 30mg Norco for lower lumber spinal stenosis pain. September 2013 - Spinal fusion surgery, 6 levels. Hospital ramped up meds 1500mg gabapentin, 100mg Norco, 80mg Oxycontin, 25mg Fentanyl patch. January 2014 - Sever nausea daily and with back pain every 4 hours. 2 trips to ER. First endoscopy found ulcer. Treated with Sucralfate and PPI. Second endo in May found no ulcers. Doctors said it was the opiates causing the nausea. CT'd Oxycontin, Fentanyl patch. July 2014 - Lost 48 lbs. due to not eating because of severe nausea. GP prescribed Prozac 20mg and Ativan 2mg prn. Tried for 4 days, quit. Two week followup GP said keep taking Prozac. 4 days, quit again. Ativan taken rarely prn for anxiety and appetite. August 2014 - Went to detox. Off opiates. Still nauseous, helmet head, drugged feeling. Doctor CT'd gabapentin. Ended up in ER. Found 2 gallstones. Gabapentin reinstated at 900mg. Tried botched up and down taper to get off Gabapentin. No tapering advice from doctor. Said to just CT again. September 2014 - Coded on table during gallbladder surgery. Developed liver biloma due to CPR by doctor. Had bile bulb inserted for 2 wks to drain. October 2014 - Gallbladder removed. Still nauseous, 3am cortisol surging, drugged helmet head, vertigo, breathlessness, whooshing head, heart palps. November 8th, 2014 - CT'd gabapentin suggested by family and 4 different doctors. Was told no withdrawal is associated with gabapentin. Have been in hell ever since. No windows, just one big tsunami every day with same symptoms for 4 months. December 26, 2014 - Found SA. At least I know I'm not insane. My family thinks I'm doing this to myself. Akathesia has become unbearable. March 10, 2015 - In absolute daily hell with no relief. Currently taking magnesium 200mg before bedtime. Link to comment
Pugknows Posted April 16, 2015 Share Posted April 16, 2015 You may want to taper the gabapentin a bit if you think it's turned on you. January 2012 - Prescribed 900mg gabapentin and 30mg Norco for lower lumber spinal stenosis pain. September 2013 - Spinal fusion surgery, 6 levels. Hospital ramped up meds 1500mg gabapentin, 100mg Norco, 80mg Oxycontin, 25mg Fentanyl patch. January 2014 - Sever nausea daily and with back pain every 4 hours. 2 trips to ER. First endoscopy found ulcer. Treated with Sucralfate and PPI. Second endo in May found no ulcers. Doctors said it was the opiates causing the nausea. CT'd Oxycontin, Fentanyl patch. July 2014 - Lost 48 lbs. due to not eating because of severe nausea. GP prescribed Prozac 20mg and Ativan 2mg prn. Tried for 4 days, quit. Two week followup GP said keep taking Prozac. 4 days, quit again. Ativan taken rarely prn for anxiety and appetite. August 2014 - Went to detox. Off opiates. Still nauseous, helmet head, drugged feeling. Doctor CT'd gabapentin. Ended up in ER. Found 2 gallstones. Gabapentin reinstated at 900mg. Tried botched up and down taper to get off Gabapentin. No tapering advice from doctor. Said to just CT again. September 2014 - Coded on table during gallbladder surgery. Developed liver biloma due to CPR by doctor. Had bile bulb inserted for 2 wks to drain. October 2014 - Gallbladder removed. Still nauseous, 3am cortisol surging, drugged helmet head, vertigo, breathlessness, whooshing head, heart palps. November 8th, 2014 - CT'd gabapentin suggested by family and 4 different doctors. Was told no withdrawal is associated with gabapentin. Have been in hell ever since. No windows, just one big tsunami every day with same symptoms for 4 months. December 26, 2014 - Found SA. At least I know I'm not insane. My family thinks I'm doing this to myself. Akathesia has become unbearable. March 10, 2015 - In absolute daily hell with no relief. Currently taking magnesium 200mg before bedtime. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Rhiannon Posted April 18, 2015 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted April 18, 2015 You're on a bunch of drugs and I'm worried you're experiencing a drug-drug interaction that could be serious. Please do what you can to post the drug interactions report or a link to it. Welcome, Hiphopanonymous. You are not far from Dr. Stuart Shipko in Pasadena. You might contact him. You need someone to sort out your drugs and side effects. HHA, it sounds to me like your CNS is pretty badly destabilized due to all the ups and downs and ons and offs of various meds over past months. As you yourself are saying, in fact. Your situation is quite complex with many different meds and many different changes, quite drastic. In my opinion, I fear your situation is beyond the expertise and reach of an Internet forum, as far as giving you medical advice (what drugs to take and what not to). We can always give you caring support though--so many of us have been through the same kind of hell, and we do get it! I also agree with you that not changing things around right now is probably your best bet, although it's going to be very tempting, because when we're suffering it's very hard to just suffer and not try to fix things. But you seem to realize that changing meds will just worsen an already very destabilized CNS. Please enter a sig line as soon as you can, summarizing your basic med history. Best of luck to you. Keep us posted. Here is the link on how to create a signature: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/893-please-put-your-withdrawal-history-in-your-signature/ hiphop, did you contact Dr. Shipko? Has the pain and burning stopped? I'm worried about your liver. The pheno plus other drugs may not be good for it. I truly think you should talk to Dr. Shipko, given your liver problems and phenobarbitol. Hi HipHop-- I can't really add anything to what's been already said. I would highly recommend you try talking to Dr. Shipko. I don't think anyone here can really tell you whether or not gabapentin is causing your problems. My guess is that it has very little to do with them and that most of what you are experiencing is due to the CTs and drug changes that you have been through in the past. I think your best bet is to contact Dr. Shipko and see what he suggests. My heart goes out to you in your suffering. Started on Prozac and Xanax in 1992 for PTSD after an assault. One drug led to more, the usual story. Got sicker and sicker, but believed I needed the drugs for my "underlying disease". Long story...lost everything. Life savings, home, physical and mental health, relationships, friendships, ability to work, everything. Amitryptiline, Prozac, bupropion, buspirone, flurazepam, diazepam, alprazolam, Paxil, citalopram, lamotrigine, gabapentin...probably more I've forgotten. Started multidrug taper in Feb 2010. Doing a very slow microtaper, down to low doses now and feeling SO much better, getting my old personality and my brain back! Able to work full time, have a full social life, and cope with stress better than ever. Not perfect, but much better. After 23 lost years. Big Pharma has a lot to answer for. And "medicine for profit" is just not a great idea. Feb 15 2010: 300 mg Neurontin 200 Lamictal 10 Celexa 0.65 Xanax and 5 mg Ambien Feb 10 2014: 62 Lamictal 1.1 Celexa 0.135 Xanax 1.8 Valium Feb 10 2015: 50 Lamictal 0.875 Celexa 0.11 Xanax 1.5 Valium Feb 15 2016: 47.5 Lamictal 0.75 Celexa 0.0875 Xanax 1.42 Valium 2/12/20 12 0.045 0.007 1 May 2021 7 0.01 0.0037 1 Feb 2022 6 0!!! 0.00167 0.98 2.5 mg Ambien Oct 2022 4.5 mg Lamictal (off Celexa, off Xanax) 0.95 Valium Ambien, 1/4 to 1/2 of a 5 mg tablet I'm not a doctor. Any advice I give is just my civilian opinion. Link to comment
Administrator Altostrata Posted April 18, 2015 Administrator Share Posted April 18, 2015 Hiphop, how did you go off the phenobarbital? Do your symptoms follow any daily pattern? When do you take gabapentin? Have you been going up and down in dosage? Did you ever see Dr. Shipko? This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner. "It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein All postings © copyrighted. Link to comment
hiphopanonymous Posted April 18, 2015 Author Share Posted April 18, 2015 Ive had the overwhelming desire to kill myself the akathesia has taken over and this is really bad ive never felt like this im going insane im not suicidal and i all the sudden have this overwhelming urge that i need to end my life my thought proccess has completely changed i cant explain it its akathesia but its mental torture of needing to burst out om my skin ive never felt like this before and ive been off of everything but gabapentin for 3 months. This feeling was coming in waves before and would break but something happened and it just stuck. I tried upping my dose and it is making it worse i dont understand its torment like i need to end my life right now. The clocks are crawling backwards im scared i thing that the gaba caused this i have now withdrawl symptoms and i have lost all emotion except rage and terror and suicidal thoughts. I tried to take benydril and it made it worse. I took sone propanolol and its kicking in but its not physical anymore its mental akathesia. My pupils are huge and one is bigger than the other my personality has completely changed from yesterday. Im not even having panick or anxiety which is the weird part my breathing is calm i dont know whats happening it feels like theres no going back from this Current meds ativan 2.5mg 3x a day gabapentin 300mg 3x a day methadone down to 38 from 40mg once a day. have tried holding. ...switching to kpin.... valium. .. updosing mskes worse all damage lies underneath all meds not in pharmocologicalwd but am in worse shape than was cold turkey symptoms never got better reinstatement only worse now in impossible web hep c toxic neurons very possible lyme kindled been reinstated for a year and symptoms and psuchological torment are so severe that i csnnot taper anything body and ming failing immune problems thyroid every type of psin photosensitive acusis psychotic terror and confusion cannot control actions cannot lsy down but cant sit i nod and awake in terror tormen every cell exploding shaking visual disturbances march agressively in place whimpering meds are killing me but cant taper off because severe symptoms waves getting worse and worse no matter what i pull my hair out need to run to er but cant help every med makes me worse sever psychotic akathisia feel like neurotoxic i live alone cant take care of myself cannot taper for years cuz im already past my threshold also herpes 1 Epstein barr maybe citamegalovirus hep c very high liver enzymes severe ocd agorifobia burning skin so so so sick piain that is unexplainable very possible lyme this is not all withdrawals im technically not even in withdrawal because higher dosed dont help makes worse cant take care to be alone my brain flips in ways that only someone being tormented in hell could understand i cant seem to find anyone to relate too cuz everyone is able to do slow tsper but im getting rapidly worse whether tspering or not but tapering i not in safe position these drugs can cause permanent damage i need off but the trauma and twisted torment im not true psychosis but i have irrational beliefs can no longer be held or touched lose grip the torment and trauma are burning me alive time is backward. Dont know what to do been looking for a year. Waves getting more more intense have to eat standing up cant breathe put sentences together lyphnode swelling whole outer neck see shadows last 6 months rapid decline every day help me. Please Link to comment
Administrator Altostrata Posted April 19, 2015 Administrator Share Posted April 19, 2015 Do not continue to experiment with various doses of drugs. Most likely, this is making you worse.If you have been taking gabapentin for a long while, take the same dosage every day, at the same time.Can you see Dr. Shipko? Do what you can to stay calm and let your nervous system heal from all the drug changes. This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner. "It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein All postings © copyrighted. Link to comment
hiphopanonymous Posted April 19, 2015 Author Share Posted April 19, 2015 It is a reaction yo the gabapentin i had to go to yhe hospital because i became completely psychotic. Something happened they gave me an ativan and it kinda went away but i couldnt take it anymore and now its coming back i dont know what to do im a mess Everything. Is buzxing my inner being changed. Current meds ativan 2.5mg 3x a day gabapentin 300mg 3x a day methadone down to 38 from 40mg once a day. have tried holding. ...switching to kpin.... valium. .. updosing mskes worse all damage lies underneath all meds not in pharmocologicalwd but am in worse shape than was cold turkey symptoms never got better reinstatement only worse now in impossible web hep c toxic neurons very possible lyme kindled been reinstated for a year and symptoms and psuchological torment are so severe that i csnnot taper anything body and ming failing immune problems thyroid every type of psin photosensitive acusis psychotic terror and confusion cannot control actions cannot lsy down but cant sit i nod and awake in terror tormen every cell exploding shaking visual disturbances march agressively in place whimpering meds are killing me but cant taper off because severe symptoms waves getting worse and worse no matter what i pull my hair out need to run to er but cant help every med makes me worse sever psychotic akathisia feel like neurotoxic i live alone cant take care of myself cannot taper for years cuz im already past my threshold also herpes 1 Epstein barr maybe citamegalovirus hep c very high liver enzymes severe ocd agorifobia burning skin so so so sick piain that is unexplainable very possible lyme this is not all withdrawals im technically not even in withdrawal because higher dosed dont help makes worse cant take care to be alone my brain flips in ways that only someone being tormented in hell could understand i cant seem to find anyone to relate too cuz everyone is able to do slow tsper but im getting rapidly worse whether tspering or not but tapering i not in safe position these drugs can cause permanent damage i need off but the trauma and twisted torment im not true psychosis but i have irrational beliefs can no longer be held or touched lose grip the torment and trauma are burning me alive time is backward. Dont know what to do been looking for a year. Waves getting more more intense have to eat standing up cant breathe put sentences together lyphnode swelling whole outer neck see shadows last 6 months rapid decline every day help me. Please Link to comment
Pugknows Posted April 19, 2015 Share Posted April 19, 2015 Hiphop, I'm so sorry you're suffering like this. I really think it's the K WD doing this, not the gabapentin. Gabapentin might make you feel nauseous, spacey, heavy headed, plugged ears, anxious, achy, but not psychotic. Try to relax and let the symptoms come and go as they please. They will anyway. January 2012 - Prescribed 900mg gabapentin and 30mg Norco for lower lumber spinal stenosis pain. September 2013 - Spinal fusion surgery, 6 levels. Hospital ramped up meds 1500mg gabapentin, 100mg Norco, 80mg Oxycontin, 25mg Fentanyl patch. January 2014 - Sever nausea daily and with back pain every 4 hours. 2 trips to ER. First endoscopy found ulcer. Treated with Sucralfate and PPI. Second endo in May found no ulcers. Doctors said it was the opiates causing the nausea. CT'd Oxycontin, Fentanyl patch. July 2014 - Lost 48 lbs. due to not eating because of severe nausea. GP prescribed Prozac 20mg and Ativan 2mg prn. Tried for 4 days, quit. Two week followup GP said keep taking Prozac. 4 days, quit again. Ativan taken rarely prn for anxiety and appetite. August 2014 - Went to detox. Off opiates. Still nauseous, helmet head, drugged feeling. Doctor CT'd gabapentin. Ended up in ER. Found 2 gallstones. Gabapentin reinstated at 900mg. Tried botched up and down taper to get off Gabapentin. No tapering advice from doctor. Said to just CT again. September 2014 - Coded on table during gallbladder surgery. Developed liver biloma due to CPR by doctor. Had bile bulb inserted for 2 wks to drain. October 2014 - Gallbladder removed. Still nauseous, 3am cortisol surging, drugged helmet head, vertigo, breathlessness, whooshing head, heart palps. November 8th, 2014 - CT'd gabapentin suggested by family and 4 different doctors. Was told no withdrawal is associated with gabapentin. Have been in hell ever since. No windows, just one big tsunami every day with same symptoms for 4 months. December 26, 2014 - Found SA. At least I know I'm not insane. My family thinks I'm doing this to myself. Akathesia has become unbearable. March 10, 2015 - In absolute daily hell with no relief. Currently taking magnesium 200mg before bedtime. Link to comment
Administrator Altostrata Posted June 1, 2016 Administrator Share Posted June 1, 2016 Please see benzo forum topichiphopanonymous severely kindled reinstated getting sicker akathisia hep c psychotic... This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner. "It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein All postings © copyrighted. Link to comment
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