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scottly9999

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LINK to scottly9999's Success Story

 

Hi All,

 

Yet another member of the OMG SSRI's I thought they were supposed to help me - club.

 

My story.

My mother is a schizophrenic - maybe related, maybe not, not sure.

In my early 20's I struggled with fairly deep depression with anxiety - no specific reason or cause - again, I think it MIGHT have been inherited something from my mother.

Got through that after a few years with help of good diet, reading a lot of self-help books, and finally travel.

Had a fantastic childhood, always on the go.  Deep interest in technology and IT.

Moved from Australia to UK to travel and see world.

Met loveliest lady in Victoria in 3 months!

Instantly knew we were right.

Happy.

Never really was a "depressive" personality, fairly introverted and normally interested in lots of things.

had some mood dips, took St Johns Wort occassionally - not sure if it did much, but low moods NEVER last long for me.  I'd always bounce back.  But nothing major.

Anyway - flashforward to about 2008.  In a job in IT.

Had an extremely stressful situation build and build - sought help internally in the company - wasn't really helped much.

Finally my wife got me to goto her regular GP doc.

She signed me off for 1 month of work, gave me some of tranquilizer which I didn't like at all, and 10mg of Lexapro.

She said I might feel MORE anxious starting Lexapro - I was a bit sceptical... but went along with it.

Work situation was sorted out, went back to work.  Was ok.

Wasn't nearly as interested though, felt less "sharp" and less switched on.  Thought it was that I was just over the job.

After approx 18 months (I really didn't take notice of a lot of the dates back then) I thought right lets stop the tablets.

Took 5mg for 2 weeks and stopped.

Started getting the brain zaps - they weren't THAT bad, thougth they were weird and interesting more than anything else.

What got me was the intense muscle aches and crippling depression and extreme confusion and brain fog.

After a few days of suffering with this and being very irritable, my wife said "For god sake, take your med!!"
So I swallowed that 10mg tablet and a few hours later, started to feel more human again.

Thats when I was like omg I'm stuck on these things.

Went to see the doc who put me on them, and she completely dismissed me saying they're not addictive.

I didn't see her again, got repeats from other doctors who seemed to understand the situation a bit better.

I went on my merry way thinking, I'll deal with coming off them another time - later when things are better.

Fast forward a few more years, in 2 newer jobs - again, struggling mentally to learn new things and retain things, and "care" about the job.

Started to get dizzy spells - 5-10 seconds, tingling in feet, and growing apathy, slowly losing more and more interest in hobbies and interests, really having to push myself.

Felt like I was in a rut... just felt "off", not myself, and constantly like I'm about to come down with the flu or something.  Was it my teeth?  Something wasn't right.

Just notched it up to being in a rut, and "getting older"... not sure why I thought that, but thats how I rationalized it.

I started getting SORT of brain zaps, even though I was taking my meds daily.

I was doing half of a 20mg tablet for years to save costs (the 20mg cost same as 10mg here in AUS).

Eventually something clicked in my brain that I wasn't feeling right, starting googling my symptoms and eventually found people on SSRI's having similar - came to various sites like survivingantidepressants and paxilprogress etc etc etc, and there were literally 10,000's of people in the same boat.

Finally an answer!

I still couldn't quite work out exactly what was going on with me though.

As I felt bad on 10mg, the thought of DROPPING in dose scared me - and I did something very very silly (in hindsight).... and took myself upto 20mg!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I know, I know.

I started to feel better, but my brain was still "drugged", but I was feeling as if my brain was getting oxygen.

I stayed there for about 2-3 weeks, and went down to 15mg - getting quite strong waves of anxiety, but it was still better than the "nothing" I'd been feeling... also got a little "high" with a fair bit of energy - and "windows" of very clear thinking... they didn't last very long though.

My aim was to "kick-start my brain" and get back to 10mg to then start tapering properly.

I jumped to 20mg in around sept or oct 2014, then 3 weeks later to 15mg.

when I got back to 10mg I started getting waves of muscle aches (to me that is the WORST withdrawal symptom - I literally cannot stand that feeling of deep pain in my body - same when I get the flu too).

Was taking some codeine and ibuprofen to take edge off, as well as a mouthful of Omega 3, Magnesium, NAC, and Choline supplements - as well as a multivitamin.

Overall, I didn't feel TOO bad, some dizziness, whooshy feelings, lightheaded, some concentration issues etc, but nothing I couldn't push through.

But I was having some waves of being interested again - which I loved... although I could STILL "feel" the Lexpro suppressing my emotions and perception ability, like things don't really penetrate, like you have cotton wool around you.

Anyway - I felt "stable" on 10mg again... and dropped to 7.5mg.... I was at that for about 4 weeks.

I was hoping to feel stable on it, but the muscle aches kept coming and going, seeming to get a bit worse with each wave, then I started to get waves of depression along with it, each "wave" seemed to be worse than the last.

After 4 weeks I thought I would be over the worst of it, and I als thought I'd be stable for Xmas time with the family.

WRONG!

I got good news about a new job - and was able to quit current job quickly - and spend 2 weeks at home.

Great.

wrong.

Crashed BIG TIME, on couch - could barely move, felt incredibly depressed, felt like lead in my arms and legs, and couldn't get off couch.

ARGH - not now!!!

went back to 10mg tablet - started to feel a bit of relief.. but it now seems after 1 week of being on 10mg that the symptoms are getting to me aghain - slowly building muscle aches and depression...

 

So the reason I'm here - I can't seem to get to a stable dose again... so do I need to go UP to 15mg to get "stable" and taper slowly from there?

I'm really confused as to what I need to do now.

I've got a bottle of liquid Lexapro, although it is 10mg /1ml  which is very potent.  I've got an oral syringe to help measure out the doses.

But I really don't know what I should do now.

 

Any advice??

 

 

Edited by ChessieCat
added link

2008 (approx) Lexapro 10mg.  2009 attempted cold turkey 5mg for 2 weeks - crash and burn.  2009 back on 10mg.

2012 - pooped out - but didn't know.   2014 - poop-out got worse.  2014 sept 20mg, 2014 oct 15mg, 2014 nov 10mg

2014 dec 7.5mg,  2014 dec 23rd crashed.  Dec 24th 10mg - trying to stabilize

2015 Jan Stabilized as much as thought I would, 2015 Jan 9mg, 2015 Late Feb, 8mg, 2015 late Mar 7mg.  22nd May 6.3mg

2015 small "slide" down to 6mg.  19th June 5mg. 15th Aug 4.5mg - slid down to 4mg.  Sept 20th 3.8mg.

2015 gradual decrease between Oct and Nov 10th to 3mg:  Dec between 3-2mg.  2016 Jan15th 2mg  Feb: 1.8mg, somewhere got to 1.6mg.

2016 Feb 25th crashed!  Not sure if sick or WD, back to 2mg.

2016 During March - gradual decrease to 1.8mg, then 1.5mg.  April 19th 1mg

2016 June 8th 0.8mg   July 1st 0.6mg:  Sept 0.4mg (long hold)

2017 Jan 0.2mg

2017 May 0!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  YAY

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Welcome. I am not in a position to advise but I wanted to welcome you. The mods will arrive to give you advice. I am six months off paxil and I do get bad muscle pain.

2002-put on amitryptiline for fibromyalgia. 10mg.2004-stopped abruptly. Didn't think it helped.2006 approx.-put on Paxil for mild anxiety 20 mg.2007 upped to 40 mg. not sure why.2011- tapered from 40 to 10. went nuts and went back to 20mg2014- tapered from 20mg to 0 from April to The end of June.current meds- Metformin(type 2 diabetic) and low dose aspirin.Take multi vitamin and vit b12, vit. D and magnesium. 5 months off Paxil. Still suffering.recently added 1.2mg of Paxil to alleviate withdrawals.(Nov 30)Dropped to .9mg because having symptoms from reinstatement.(dec 23)<p>taper to .76mg-.8mg (Feb 3) approx. weight .010 to about .008-.009 on scale.
.6mg (march 19th.) .5mg(April 19th)
.4mg(April 27th)
.2 (June 27th)

0mg.  done taper at beginning of August.

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It sounds like the 10mg dose had "pooped out" on you, meaning you achieved tolerance and started to have some withdrawal symptoms.  That is very common after a few years of use.  And you didn't stay on the 20mg or 15mg long enough to stabilize at the new dose.  As repugnant as it sounds, yeah I think you should go up in dose (start with 15 and see if that is enough) and wait a good while before doing a much slower taper.

Paxil 20mg 1994-2005
Tried to quit twice, finally did it on my 3rd attempt in 2005.

I went from 20mg to zero in about four months, believing at the time that it was a reasonable taper.  It wasn't.  I suffered mostly emotional symptoms: frequent episodes of "anxious depression" lasting for about 17 months before it got noticeably better.

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Hi Scottly9999,

Welcome to SA, I'm sorry to hear you've been having problems getting off lexapro, I also had severe muscle pain and couldn't move from the couch as some of my early withdrawal symptoms.  Thank you for sharing your story.

 

It sounds to me that the recent dose changes, going up and then down, and back up again etc, have caused your nervous system to become unstable. We suggest reducing by no more than 10% of the current dose every 4 weeks, this reduces the risk of withdrawal symptoms arising.  Please read through this which will explain why:

  

Why taper by 10% of my dosage?  (The general philosophy of gradual tapering)

 

Its not going to be a particular dose which makes you stable, but time staying on one dose.  I suggest you stay right where you are now on 10mg and wait it out.  It may take a while before you start to feel better again, possibly several weeks or months.  When you have stabilized, you can begin a proper safe taper, here are our tips for tapering off Lexapro:

 

http://survivinganti...o-escitalopram/

 

Here is the link to our symptoms and self care section, you may find some useful ideas to help manage symptoms as you wait to stabilize. Especially read the topics pinned at the top.

 

Please put your drug and withdrawal history in your signature.  Putting a short version of your drug and tapering history in your signature helps people understand your context, it appears below each of your posts.  Here are instructions for how to do it:

 

http://survivinganti...your-signature/

 

I’m glad you found us, we’re here to support you.  Please stay in touch and let us know what you decide.  You can use this thread as your ongoing journal to track progress and communicate with the community, add to it whenever you want.

 

Petu.

I'm not a doctor.  My comments are not medical advise. These are my opinions based on my own experience and what I've learned. Please discuss your situation with a medical practitioner who has knowledge of tapering and withdrawal...if you are lucky enough to find one.

My Introduction Thread

Full Drug and Withdrawal History

Brief Summary

Several SSRIs for 13 years starting 1997 (for mild to moderate partly situational anxiety) Xanax PRN ~ Various other drugs over the years for side effects

2 month 'taper' off Lexapro 2010

Short acute withdrawal, followed by 2 -3 months of improvement then delayed protracted withdrawal

DX ADHD followed by several years of stimulants and other drugs trying to manage increasing symptoms

Failed reinstatement of Lexapro and trial of Prozac (became suicidal)

May 2013 Found SA, learned about withdrawal, stopped taking drugs...healing begins.

Protracted withdrawal, with a very sensitized nervous system, slowly recovering as time passes

Supplements which have helped: Vitamin C, Magnesium, Taurine

Bad reactions: Many supplements but mostly fish oil and Vitamin D

June 2016 - Started daily juicing, mostly vegetables and lots of greens.

Aug 2016 - Oct 2016 Best window ever, felt almost completely recovered

Oct 2016 -Symptoms returned - bad days and less bad days.

April 2018 - No windows, but significant improvement, it feels like permanent full recovery is close.

VIDEO: Where did the chemical imbalance theory come from?



VIDEO: How are psychiatric diagnoses made?



VIDEO: Why do psychiatric drugs have withdrawal syndromes?



VIDEO: Can psychiatric drugs cause long-lasting negative effects?

VIDEO: Dr. Claire Weekes

 

 

 

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Wow - thanks for quick replies everybody.

I do think my nervous system is a bit messed up currently.

I've always been fairly sensitive to caffeine and alcohol - even before SSRI.

I guess it's hard for each individual as to what part of the process we are at, but when it's not stable and you can't just retreat to a "safe place" - ie: what dose, it's hard.

I just hate the way the meds have robbed me of the subtle parts of my personality and that I feel so desensitized and lost simple pleasures like I used to have.

Also the pooping out - which is pretty much the way I worked it out.

Hi Babs - I think going back to 15mg is probably a good bet... as the goal is getting off them, but doing it with minimal issues and side effects, not from what starting dose.

I guess I just worry that if I've got enough issues to make me post on a forum board at 10mg and 7.5mg - haven't I got to get back down to this level?

2008 (approx) Lexapro 10mg.  2009 attempted cold turkey 5mg for 2 weeks - crash and burn.  2009 back on 10mg.

2012 - pooped out - but didn't know.   2014 - poop-out got worse.  2014 sept 20mg, 2014 oct 15mg, 2014 nov 10mg

2014 dec 7.5mg,  2014 dec 23rd crashed.  Dec 24th 10mg - trying to stabilize

2015 Jan Stabilized as much as thought I would, 2015 Jan 9mg, 2015 Late Feb, 8mg, 2015 late Mar 7mg.  22nd May 6.3mg

2015 small "slide" down to 6mg.  19th June 5mg. 15th Aug 4.5mg - slid down to 4mg.  Sept 20th 3.8mg.

2015 gradual decrease between Oct and Nov 10th to 3mg:  Dec between 3-2mg.  2016 Jan15th 2mg  Feb: 1.8mg, somewhere got to 1.6mg.

2016 Feb 25th crashed!  Not sure if sick or WD, back to 2mg.

2016 During March - gradual decrease to 1.8mg, then 1.5mg.  April 19th 1mg

2016 June 8th 0.8mg   July 1st 0.6mg:  Sept 0.4mg (long hold)

2017 Jan 0.2mg

2017 May 0!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  YAY

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It's always hard and kind of a crapshoot figuring out what to do after a poop out.  Upon re-reading your original post I'm thinking Petu has it right, that you should hold where you are and then taper much slower.  15 might give you some relief and it might not, and if it doesn't you've kind of jerked around with your brain again which is never a good thing.

Paxil 20mg 1994-2005
Tried to quit twice, finally did it on my 3rd attempt in 2005.

I went from 20mg to zero in about four months, believing at the time that it was a reasonable taper.  It wasn't.  I suffered mostly emotional symptoms: frequent episodes of "anxious depression" lasting for about 17 months before it got noticeably better.

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Agree with Petu--after jumping around doses so much so recently, what your CNS probably needs now is some consistency and stability. I suppose it's possible that going up on dose would help, but it didn't seem to help when you did it in Sept. and Oct., and overall we find that changing doses and bouncing things around causes more problems than it helps.

 

It's pretty normal for people to find that over the long term using these drugs, their condition worsens rather than becoming better or staying the same. The "poop-out" phenomenon is, as far as I know, anecdotal; we don't really know for sure that people are developing tolerance to the drug or if something else is going on.

 

I'd highly recommend getting hold of a copy of Anatomy of an Epidemic by Robert Whitaker. I think you'll find it interesting and you'll see yourself in those pages.

 

I'd recommend seeing what happens if you just hold that 10 mg for a few months and give your nervous system time to recover from the scrambling it got with the big dose changes this past fall. Once you're stable you can try a very small reduction and see how it goes. You may do well with a slow taper.

Started on Prozac and Xanax in 1992 for PTSD after an assault. One drug led to more, the usual story. Got sicker and sicker, but believed I needed the drugs for my "underlying disease". Long story...lost everything. Life savings, home, physical and mental health, relationships, friendships, ability to work, everything. Amitryptiline, Prozac, bupropion, buspirone, flurazepam, diazepam, alprazolam, Paxil, citalopram, lamotrigine, gabapentin...probably more I've forgotten. 

Started multidrug taper in Feb 2010.  Doing a very slow microtaper, down to low doses now and feeling SO much better, getting my old personality and my brain back! Able to work full time, have a full social life, and cope with stress better than ever. Not perfect, but much better. After 23 lost years. Big Pharma has a lot to answer for. And "medicine for profit" is just not a great idea.

 

Feb 15 2010:  300 mg Neurontin  200 Lamictal   10 Celexa      0.65 Xanax   and 5 mg Ambien 

Feb 10 2014:   62 Lamictal    1.1 Celexa         0.135 Xanax    1.8 Valium

Feb 10 2015:   50 Lamictal      0.875 Celexa    0.11 Xanax      1.5 Valium

Feb 15 2016:   47.5 Lamictal   0.75 Celexa      0.0875 Xanax    1.42 Valium    

2/12/20             12                       0.045               0.007                   1 

May 2021            7                       0.01                  0.0037                1

Feb 2022            6                      0!!!                     0.00167               0.98                2.5 mg Ambien

Oct 2022       4.5 mg Lamictal    (off Celexa, off Xanax)   0.95 Valium    Ambien, 1/4 to 1/2 of a 5 mg tablet 

 

I'm not a doctor. Any advice I give is just my civilian opinion.

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Hi all.

Again - thanks so much for your replies.

They really help a lot.

Since my post, my muscle aches and pains have subsided gradually.  I'm left with a tingling in my hands at most now - I've had that for 6 weeks + constantly now.

Mood has stabilized a bit too.

So fingers crossed I level out at 10mg again, and when I feel rested enough to try a drop to 9mg with a 5mg half tablet and 4mg of liquid.

HOpefully my rest at 10mg gives my CNS to get some balance.

2008 (approx) Lexapro 10mg.  2009 attempted cold turkey 5mg for 2 weeks - crash and burn.  2009 back on 10mg.

2012 - pooped out - but didn't know.   2014 - poop-out got worse.  2014 sept 20mg, 2014 oct 15mg, 2014 nov 10mg

2014 dec 7.5mg,  2014 dec 23rd crashed.  Dec 24th 10mg - trying to stabilize

2015 Jan Stabilized as much as thought I would, 2015 Jan 9mg, 2015 Late Feb, 8mg, 2015 late Mar 7mg.  22nd May 6.3mg

2015 small "slide" down to 6mg.  19th June 5mg. 15th Aug 4.5mg - slid down to 4mg.  Sept 20th 3.8mg.

2015 gradual decrease between Oct and Nov 10th to 3mg:  Dec between 3-2mg.  2016 Jan15th 2mg  Feb: 1.8mg, somewhere got to 1.6mg.

2016 Feb 25th crashed!  Not sure if sick or WD, back to 2mg.

2016 During March - gradual decrease to 1.8mg, then 1.5mg.  April 19th 1mg

2016 June 8th 0.8mg   July 1st 0.6mg:  Sept 0.4mg (long hold)

2017 Jan 0.2mg

2017 May 0!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  YAY

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I get all the weak aching muscles too scottly. Its been real bad the past few months and it seems to come and go. Very frightening when it's happening but I now realize it goes away and doesn't last as long now with this last little bit I'm on. I suggest you just hang on and push through while tapering when you feel better. The only way off this crap is through these awful symptoms, even with a slow taper as I have done I get these things but nothing that is making me bedridden.

Paxil start September 2003 due to Fluoroquinolone adverse reaction that I wish doc. knew what it was. 10mg. most of the time with a few short runs of 20mg. FAST tapered 3 times and finally hit poop out or a reaction to nsaid's in Nov.2013. Started a 10% taper Jan. 2014 and have been ok until Sept 14 and went through a short hell. Now plodding through and looking for the light with unrelenting insomnia and pain, fog, loss of interests....<p>12/20/14 - .8mg.

1/01/15 - .75 mg.

1/15/15 - .42 mg. better sleep now, hope it continues...

2/11-15 - .25 mg. doing really good!! 2 weeks feel 85% of old me!

3/17/15 .14 mg. Knee pain bad!

4/07/15 .05 mg. this is so small now that I am estimating and just licking it off palm small as a "." 

4/13/15 NOTHING !!!! Took my last little micro dose on 4/12/15. 

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Muscle aches and pains are terrible.  I get pain and burning and tingling in my legs and feet and arms.  Weakness as well.  Sorry to hear about your situation.  Glad your aches and pains are subsiding.

2002-put on amitryptiline for fibromyalgia. 10mg.2004-stopped abruptly. Didn't think it helped.2006 approx.-put on Paxil for mild anxiety 20 mg.2007 upped to 40 mg. not sure why.2011- tapered from 40 to 10. went nuts and went back to 20mg2014- tapered from 20mg to 0 from April to The end of June.current meds- Metformin(type 2 diabetic) and low dose aspirin.Take multi vitamin and vit b12, vit. D and magnesium. 5 months off Paxil. Still suffering.recently added 1.2mg of Paxil to alleviate withdrawals.(Nov 30)Dropped to .9mg because having symptoms from reinstatement.(dec 23)<p>taper to .76mg-.8mg (Feb 3) approx. weight .010 to about .008-.009 on scale.
.6mg (march 19th.) .5mg(April 19th)
.4mg(April 27th)
.2 (June 27th)

0mg.  done taper at beginning of August.

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I have had paresthesia type sensation in both my hands. I heard it may relate to serotonin overload and that this will clear with time...

I did not have it last night at all...

- 12.03.2021- doxepin- 50mg

- 6.11.2020- 75mg

- 16.10.2020- 100mg

- 30.09.2020- doxepin- 125mg

- May 2020, omeprazole 40mg switched to esomeprazole 20mg

- 2012 re-started Doxepin 75mg, evening. Increased to 150mg

- 2012, Atenolol 25mg, twice a day

- 2016, Low dose of HRT in evening, Sandrena and Utrogestan 

- Long term of Nasal spray Otrivine

- 2012, PPI Omeprazole 40mg-evening

24.10.2014- Started ESCITALOPRAM-first 5mg and then 10mg; due to the adverse symptoms reduced on 5.01.2015- Escitalopram- 2.5mg 22.07.2016- re-started reduction by 1% at a time. Completed tappering on  19.03.2020 😇

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  • 2 weeks later...

Hi All,

Just wanted to check in with another update.

I'd been on the 10mg (taking half a 20mg escitalopram tablet) daily, since I crashed out on 23rd Dec.

Slowly the worst physical symptoms went away - had a few very slight muscle aches in waves, but not much and long for long..

But genreeally my brain just wasn't right - and I was back go the "poop-out" or "tolerance" or whatever that I felt while on 10mg for years.... the gradual decline in mental and emotional health.

I had seen my GP and got a script for liquid Lexapro as well as an assortment of escitalopram tablets in 20mg and 10mg sizes (thats all thats available in Australia apparently).

The liquid Lexapro is 10mg per 1ml

So have to use the syringe to measure out .1ml size to get the right amount - literally a few drops.

I decided I wasn't getting any more stable - and took 4mg of liquid Lexapro and 5mg escitalopram tablet (half a 10mg tab). this morning.

After about 30 mins or so I could feel a substantial difference.

felt my brain WAKE UP, mood stabilized, suddenly more motivated, clearer thinking, just "better"... still "drugged" for lack of a better term, but more "me", more fleshed out.

 

From what I've looked up online there is very little - if any - difference between Lexapro and esctialopram...

but could my positive experience be related to crapping out on generic??

Either way - it's a beam of light.

Any thoughts on what might be happening??

2008 (approx) Lexapro 10mg.  2009 attempted cold turkey 5mg for 2 weeks - crash and burn.  2009 back on 10mg.

2012 - pooped out - but didn't know.   2014 - poop-out got worse.  2014 sept 20mg, 2014 oct 15mg, 2014 nov 10mg

2014 dec 7.5mg,  2014 dec 23rd crashed.  Dec 24th 10mg - trying to stabilize

2015 Jan Stabilized as much as thought I would, 2015 Jan 9mg, 2015 Late Feb, 8mg, 2015 late Mar 7mg.  22nd May 6.3mg

2015 small "slide" down to 6mg.  19th June 5mg. 15th Aug 4.5mg - slid down to 4mg.  Sept 20th 3.8mg.

2015 gradual decrease between Oct and Nov 10th to 3mg:  Dec between 3-2mg.  2016 Jan15th 2mg  Feb: 1.8mg, somewhere got to 1.6mg.

2016 Feb 25th crashed!  Not sure if sick or WD, back to 2mg.

2016 During March - gradual decrease to 1.8mg, then 1.5mg.  April 19th 1mg

2016 June 8th 0.8mg   July 1st 0.6mg:  Sept 0.4mg (long hold)

2017 Jan 0.2mg

2017 May 0!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  YAY

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Hello Scottly,

 

I read your history and I can see that there have been a lot of changes especially recently. When we say stabilising after a crash we have in mind months and not weeks. Crash is a very serious matter. The fact that reinstating the drug helps is great but it shouldn't be abused. If I were you I definitely wouldn't have touched the drug yet. We all wait for 2 or 3 weeks of being stable (relatively symptom free or with manageable symptoms) before continuing with our taper. Tapering at the first sign of improvement is asking for trouble.  I hope I'm wrong but in over a year since I've been here I have seen too many stories like that.

 

It usually takes 4 to 7 days for our brain to register the change in the dose so it's too early to say.

 

I was so awfully scared by my crash that initially before making any changes with my drugs I would come here and ask for the opinion of more experienced members. Very often they stopped me from tapering and advised that I give it more time. I'm incredibly grateful to them.

 

I'm very much interested in your experience since I have yet to deal with Lexapro so look forward to hearing for updates from you. I couldn't help sharing my concern but I hope things work out. It's very good that this cut was relatively small. It takes some time to get the hang of tapering but is saves us from so much suffering.

 

Keep us posted.

 

Best,

Bubble 

Current: 9/2022 Xanax 0.08, Lexapro 2

2020 Xanax 0.26 (down from 2 mg in 2013), Lexapro 2.85 mg (down from 5 mg 2013)

Amitriptyline (tricyclic AD) and clonazepam for 3 months to treat headache in 1996 
1999. - present Xanax prn up to 3 mg.
2000-2005 Prozac CT twice, 2005-2010 Zoloft CT 3 times, 2010-2013 Escitalopram 10 mg
went from 2.5 to zero on 7 Aug 2013, bad crash 40 days after
reinstated to 5 mg Escitalopram 4Oct 2013 and holding liquid Xanax every 5 hours
28 Jan 2014 Xanax 1.9, 18 Apr  2015 1 mg,  25 June 2015 Lex 4.8, 6 Aug Lexapro 4.6, 1 Jan 2016 0.64  Xanax     9 month hold

24 Sept 2016 4.5 Lex, 17 Oct 4.4 Lex (Nov 0.63 Xanax, Dec 0.625 Xanax), 1 Jan 2017 4.3 Lex, 24 Jan 4.2, 5 Feb 4.1, 24 Mar 4 mg, 10 Apr 3.9 mg, May 3.85, June 3.8, July 3.75, 22 July 3.7, 15 Aug 3.65, 17 Sept 3.6, 1 Jan 2018 3.55, 19 Jan 3.5, 16 Mar 3.4, 14 Apr 3.3, 23 May 3.2, 16 June 3.15, 15 Jul 3.1, 31 Jul 3, 21 Aug 2.9 26 Sept 2.85, 14 Nov Xan 0.61, 1 Dec 0.59, 19 Dec 0.58, 4 Jan 0.565, 6 Feb 0.55, 20 Feb 0.535, 1 Mar 0.505, 10 Mar 0.475, 14 Mar 0.45, 4 Apr 0.415, 13 Apr 0.37, 21 Apr 0.33, 29 Apr 0.29, 10 May 0.27, 17 May 0.25, 28 May 0.22, 19 June 0.22, 21 Jun updose to 0.24, 24 Jun updose to 0.26

Supplements: Omega 3 + Vit E, Vit C, D, magnesium, Taurine, probiotic 

I'm not a medical professional. Any advice I give is based on my own experience and reading. 

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Hi Bubbles.

 

Very much appreciate the feedback and comments.

I guess I might need to flesh out some of what happened, and my logic that got me to where I am today.

 

When I dropped from 10mg to 7.5mg - yes too much of a drop in Lexapro (escitalopram) I had the physical symptoms on and off.

muscle aches coming and going, tingling in hands most of the time.

mood swings - only really mild ones.

Some days I could concentrate at work really well, others a bit harder.

After 4 weeks at 7.5mg the symptoms tended to get worse.

I was getting bigger mood swings - no outburst, but I could feel a HUGE wave of depressino hitting me.

Ironically I had positive things happening, just landed a new job - minimal time to resign from crappy job (able to walk out!!!)

Had 1.5 weeks off work to spend time with family and friends.

BUT I crashed mood wise... 2 days and I was like NOPE - the muscle aches were slowly getting worse.

The dizziness, light-headedness and other symptoms all had gone by this stage.

Just a crash in mood and muscle aches.

 

I took the 10mg (half tablet) again - and the muscle aches gradually lifted, as did my mood.

I wasn't very happy - just LESS depressed...

Over the next few weeks, I settled back into my "poop out" feeling that I'd had for years, just felt OFF all the time... zero interest in most activities, really forcing myself.

It felt exactly the same as I'd been for years - and why I decided to get off.

The physical symptoms disappeared, muscle aches etc.

Just the "zombie" like MEH state, plus the feeling I'm not right.  Generally pretty crap.

Again - I can tell that it's the tablet doing it, not the "real" me.
Had there been many studies on these tablets for people that might not really have needed them?

 

Keep in mind - at the time I was put on these meds, I wasn't really suffering with depression in myself.

I was in an exceptionally stressful situation at work - my boss was dismissed afterwards - so there were changes put in place.

I was taking the escitalopram, but didn't really even notice or feel it.

Looking back, I can tell it was making me BORED of just about EVERYTHING - but I didn't see it at the time.  Thought I was just bummed out in that job.

I can tell NOW that it was the tablets doing that to me, still doing it now.

 

I do understand the slow approach - but I'm suspecting that most people aren't in the "poop out" phase?  Or if they are - how are they mananging it?? 

I also understand that (and can confirm in my experiments) that it does take about 3-5 days to feel the effect of a dose change.

However, what REALLY confused me is within 20-30 mins of taking 4mg of the liquid Lexapro with a 5mg (half tablet) I could seriously feel a change.

I've also got tingling in hands again - no muscle aches.

 

I really don't know if it's that I've been taking generic escitalopram - and now mixed with branded Lexapro?

Or the liquid?  Maybe it got into my system quicker?

 

Either way - as of 2 days now (such a short time I know), I feel "better", not normal, but closer to normal than I have on 10mg escitalopram for a long time.

My experiment also showed me that going up and back down to 10mg brought on some changes, but getting back to 10mg was exactly the same.

The THOUGHT of going DOWN was scary - if I feel really yucky now - how bad will I feel going down in dose?

 

It's a HORRIBLE place to be, and very little answers.

 

Bubbles - what was your crash like??  How did you know you crashed??

 

When you go back up in dose - you ask yourself, could I have pushed through that mood dip and have been ok?????  But as it was RIGHT ON Christmas time - I thought I'd timed my dose drop to be stable by then, I just couldn't be super depressed on Christmas day with my kids and family!

 

I again thank you for posting, and listening.  Just knowing that somebody is reading helps.

 

As another poster earlier said, it did seem like I was in "poop out" (that seems to mean different things to different people for sure), and that when thats the case, it's a bit of a crapshoot - sometimes going down helps, sometimes, not...

 

I guess the crux of my situation is has anybody mixed Lexapro liquid with escitalopram tablets before and had a positive effect such as I've had?

2008 (approx) Lexapro 10mg.  2009 attempted cold turkey 5mg for 2 weeks - crash and burn.  2009 back on 10mg.

2012 - pooped out - but didn't know.   2014 - poop-out got worse.  2014 sept 20mg, 2014 oct 15mg, 2014 nov 10mg

2014 dec 7.5mg,  2014 dec 23rd crashed.  Dec 24th 10mg - trying to stabilize

2015 Jan Stabilized as much as thought I would, 2015 Jan 9mg, 2015 Late Feb, 8mg, 2015 late Mar 7mg.  22nd May 6.3mg

2015 small "slide" down to 6mg.  19th June 5mg. 15th Aug 4.5mg - slid down to 4mg.  Sept 20th 3.8mg.

2015 gradual decrease between Oct and Nov 10th to 3mg:  Dec between 3-2mg.  2016 Jan15th 2mg  Feb: 1.8mg, somewhere got to 1.6mg.

2016 Feb 25th crashed!  Not sure if sick or WD, back to 2mg.

2016 During March - gradual decrease to 1.8mg, then 1.5mg.  April 19th 1mg

2016 June 8th 0.8mg   July 1st 0.6mg:  Sept 0.4mg (long hold)

2017 Jan 0.2mg

2017 May 0!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  YAY

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  • Moderator Emeritus
However, what REALLY confused me is within 20-30 mins of taking 4mg of the liquid Lexapro with a 5mg (half tablet) I could seriously feel a change.

I've also got tingling in hands again - no muscle aches.

 

I really don't know if it's that I've been taking generic escitalopram - and now mixed with branded Lexapro?

Or the liquid?  Maybe it got into my system quicker?

 

Either way - as of 2 days now (such a short time I know), I feel "better", not normal, but closer to normal than I have on 10mg escitalopram for a long time.

 

I've seen people write that the liquid often works faster than tablets, so that may account for why you're feeling better so soon, I'm glad to hear it.

I'm not a doctor.  My comments are not medical advise. These are my opinions based on my own experience and what I've learned. Please discuss your situation with a medical practitioner who has knowledge of tapering and withdrawal...if you are lucky enough to find one.

My Introduction Thread

Full Drug and Withdrawal History

Brief Summary

Several SSRIs for 13 years starting 1997 (for mild to moderate partly situational anxiety) Xanax PRN ~ Various other drugs over the years for side effects

2 month 'taper' off Lexapro 2010

Short acute withdrawal, followed by 2 -3 months of improvement then delayed protracted withdrawal

DX ADHD followed by several years of stimulants and other drugs trying to manage increasing symptoms

Failed reinstatement of Lexapro and trial of Prozac (became suicidal)

May 2013 Found SA, learned about withdrawal, stopped taking drugs...healing begins.

Protracted withdrawal, with a very sensitized nervous system, slowly recovering as time passes

Supplements which have helped: Vitamin C, Magnesium, Taurine

Bad reactions: Many supplements but mostly fish oil and Vitamin D

June 2016 - Started daily juicing, mostly vegetables and lots of greens.

Aug 2016 - Oct 2016 Best window ever, felt almost completely recovered

Oct 2016 -Symptoms returned - bad days and less bad days.

April 2018 - No windows, but significant improvement, it feels like permanent full recovery is close.

VIDEO: Where did the chemical imbalance theory come from?



VIDEO: How are psychiatric diagnoses made?



VIDEO: Why do psychiatric drugs have withdrawal syndromes?



VIDEO: Can psychiatric drugs cause long-lasting negative effects?

VIDEO: Dr. Claire Weekes

 

 

 

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Hi Scottly,

 

I'm so pleased you're here! Oh my goodness I can identify with so much f what you've described ... Especially the 'how the heck did I get here?? And with I EVER be free?? But people here have, and tha gives me hope, mostly they seem to have got there by finding enormous fortitude and Extraordinary patience!!

 

I'm stuck on 10mg too of paroxetine and feeling pretty average, although potentially things are improving slow. I also do remember someone here mentioning they noticed a significant difference between generic and branded drug.

 

:)

 

Drug history

  • 20mg paxil in 2001 - 4 months use  
  • 20mg paxil in 2003 - 2 months use 
  • 20mg paxil in 2008 - 8 years continuous

Withdrawal history:

  • March 2014 - disastrous alternate day taper
  • Jan 2015 - 15mg to 10mg. Disaster
  • Sept 2015 -  10mg to 5mg. Disaster. Reinstated to 6mg. Relief
  • Oct 2015 - started slow 10% taper 
  • Oct 2016 - at 4mg- stop taking paxil (not recommended)

 

I'm not a medical professional. Seek advice from a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

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Hi Molly,

 

YES...!  The whole "I'll take this tablet coz you're the doctor"...

but then a gradual decline in general wellbeing, and what is wrong with me??

Try stopping, bad bad BAD reaction...

That horrifying feeling of being TRAPPED on this tablet - that doesn't even FEEL like its doing anything, but if I don't take it, BANG!

 

I always had a few waves of being depressed, or bored from time to time... but 6-7 years on these tablets, and the bored and listlessness is SO ANNOYING!

 

I have faith in myself that I'm reading my body well, and now 3 days on just 9mg, I can feel "less" of the drug, and have had a few flashes of the old me - hearing the rain at night while in bed actually ALMOST felt nice - always used to love that - but lately it's just MEH.

 

I'm also hoping that I'm getting some mileage out of the mix of liquid Lexapro and the escitalopram tablets.

Can def feel some sort of sensations in my body - but thats telling me that something is happening, and I'm encouraged by that.

2008 (approx) Lexapro 10mg.  2009 attempted cold turkey 5mg for 2 weeks - crash and burn.  2009 back on 10mg.

2012 - pooped out - but didn't know.   2014 - poop-out got worse.  2014 sept 20mg, 2014 oct 15mg, 2014 nov 10mg

2014 dec 7.5mg,  2014 dec 23rd crashed.  Dec 24th 10mg - trying to stabilize

2015 Jan Stabilized as much as thought I would, 2015 Jan 9mg, 2015 Late Feb, 8mg, 2015 late Mar 7mg.  22nd May 6.3mg

2015 small "slide" down to 6mg.  19th June 5mg. 15th Aug 4.5mg - slid down to 4mg.  Sept 20th 3.8mg.

2015 gradual decrease between Oct and Nov 10th to 3mg:  Dec between 3-2mg.  2016 Jan15th 2mg  Feb: 1.8mg, somewhere got to 1.6mg.

2016 Feb 25th crashed!  Not sure if sick or WD, back to 2mg.

2016 During March - gradual decrease to 1.8mg, then 1.5mg.  April 19th 1mg

2016 June 8th 0.8mg   July 1st 0.6mg:  Sept 0.4mg (long hold)

2017 Jan 0.2mg

2017 May 0!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  YAY

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Ok, so 3 days into my 9mg taper.

Feeling some strange - but overly unpleasant effects.

But the best part is I can feel the drug "lifting" off my mind... slowly feeling a bit more connected to my environment, and a bit more "awake".

Those words don't quite describe it exactly, it's difficult to articulate.

A few whooshy head feelings, more tingling (but not pain) in hands, arms and legs.

Mild headache started.

It's ALMOST like a mild adrenaline rush for lack of a better description.

2008 (approx) Lexapro 10mg.  2009 attempted cold turkey 5mg for 2 weeks - crash and burn.  2009 back on 10mg.

2012 - pooped out - but didn't know.   2014 - poop-out got worse.  2014 sept 20mg, 2014 oct 15mg, 2014 nov 10mg

2014 dec 7.5mg,  2014 dec 23rd crashed.  Dec 24th 10mg - trying to stabilize

2015 Jan Stabilized as much as thought I would, 2015 Jan 9mg, 2015 Late Feb, 8mg, 2015 late Mar 7mg.  22nd May 6.3mg

2015 small "slide" down to 6mg.  19th June 5mg. 15th Aug 4.5mg - slid down to 4mg.  Sept 20th 3.8mg.

2015 gradual decrease between Oct and Nov 10th to 3mg:  Dec between 3-2mg.  2016 Jan15th 2mg  Feb: 1.8mg, somewhere got to 1.6mg.

2016 Feb 25th crashed!  Not sure if sick or WD, back to 2mg.

2016 During March - gradual decrease to 1.8mg, then 1.5mg.  April 19th 1mg

2016 June 8th 0.8mg   July 1st 0.6mg:  Sept 0.4mg (long hold)

2017 Jan 0.2mg

2017 May 0!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  YAY

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  • 2 weeks later...
  • Administrator

How are you doing now, scottly?

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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Latest update.

It's now 2 weeks into my 9mg taper, after I held at 10mg for about a month or so.

Hard to say really how I'm doing, as I keep thinking to myself about "poop-out" or tolerance... I'll explain.

The "good" feeling has disappeared.

With each dosage change, I tend to get an almost euphoric feeling - that seems to last about 5-7 days.

Which usually is quite nice and a change from the "crapped out" feeling I normally have on my regular 10mg dose.

  Again - I'd really like to point out that I really didn't have any issues with depression or anxiety "long term" in myself before starting these meds.

  I was put on them by a Doctor due to an extremely stressful period in my life at the time. 

  She said they're not addictive.

 

I had a bit of arm and leg tingling for a few days, but nothing I couldn' tget through.

No aches and pains which is good, those are the worst for me.

My mood has dipped a fair bit though over the last week.

SLowly going lower and lower.

 

I just can't stress enough how this isn't what I used to be like - pre-meds.

I USED to be able to pull myself out of it fairly easily.

Now it's really pervasive and difficult to shake, when I get like this.

 

It seems to be that the 2 hardest symptoms I deal with in WD (or even poop out) is very low mood and body aches.

It's not as low as when I crashed at 7.5mg though.

 

I guess I just have to ride this wave out, see how long it lasts, and note it down - so that I can be prepared for future waves.

 

I just am looking forward to being off these things - not "feeling" their effect - blunting everything, and getting "me" back.

 

I spent a day mowing the grass, fixing a door, dismantling play equipment - was physically active for a good 3.5 - 4 hours.

Worked up a good sweat... but didn't "feel" the good, and felt very flat 2 hours later.

I know in myself that sort of thing would have made me feel really good normally.

2008 (approx) Lexapro 10mg.  2009 attempted cold turkey 5mg for 2 weeks - crash and burn.  2009 back on 10mg.

2012 - pooped out - but didn't know.   2014 - poop-out got worse.  2014 sept 20mg, 2014 oct 15mg, 2014 nov 10mg

2014 dec 7.5mg,  2014 dec 23rd crashed.  Dec 24th 10mg - trying to stabilize

2015 Jan Stabilized as much as thought I would, 2015 Jan 9mg, 2015 Late Feb, 8mg, 2015 late Mar 7mg.  22nd May 6.3mg

2015 small "slide" down to 6mg.  19th June 5mg. 15th Aug 4.5mg - slid down to 4mg.  Sept 20th 3.8mg.

2015 gradual decrease between Oct and Nov 10th to 3mg:  Dec between 3-2mg.  2016 Jan15th 2mg  Feb: 1.8mg, somewhere got to 1.6mg.

2016 Feb 25th crashed!  Not sure if sick or WD, back to 2mg.

2016 During March - gradual decrease to 1.8mg, then 1.5mg.  April 19th 1mg

2016 June 8th 0.8mg   July 1st 0.6mg:  Sept 0.4mg (long hold)

2017 Jan 0.2mg

2017 May 0!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  YAY

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Another quick update.

Mood lightened a bit.  was very low yesterday - last night.

Even with looking forward to watching Socceroos in semi-final and Nick Kyrgios in the tennis.
Watched those, but didn't get excited.

Mood is def a bit lighter today.

Hope that is the end of that wave?

2008 (approx) Lexapro 10mg.  2009 attempted cold turkey 5mg for 2 weeks - crash and burn.  2009 back on 10mg.

2012 - pooped out - but didn't know.   2014 - poop-out got worse.  2014 sept 20mg, 2014 oct 15mg, 2014 nov 10mg

2014 dec 7.5mg,  2014 dec 23rd crashed.  Dec 24th 10mg - trying to stabilize

2015 Jan Stabilized as much as thought I would, 2015 Jan 9mg, 2015 Late Feb, 8mg, 2015 late Mar 7mg.  22nd May 6.3mg

2015 small "slide" down to 6mg.  19th June 5mg. 15th Aug 4.5mg - slid down to 4mg.  Sept 20th 3.8mg.

2015 gradual decrease between Oct and Nov 10th to 3mg:  Dec between 3-2mg.  2016 Jan15th 2mg  Feb: 1.8mg, somewhere got to 1.6mg.

2016 Feb 25th crashed!  Not sure if sick or WD, back to 2mg.

2016 During March - gradual decrease to 1.8mg, then 1.5mg.  April 19th 1mg

2016 June 8th 0.8mg   July 1st 0.6mg:  Sept 0.4mg (long hold)

2017 Jan 0.2mg

2017 May 0!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  YAY

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  • Administrator

Think of it as surfing the waves!

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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Altostrata - love it.

 

I guess I have a question... in tapering off, and we experience waves and windows... how do you know you're stable enough to attempt the next drop?

Do the waves and windows diminish for a single drop?

Or will it be up and down all the way through the taper?

Improvement again today - often the better you feel, the more you realize how bad you were in a wave.

Very tired though.

Mentally a bit better.

2008 (approx) Lexapro 10mg.  2009 attempted cold turkey 5mg for 2 weeks - crash and burn.  2009 back on 10mg.

2012 - pooped out - but didn't know.   2014 - poop-out got worse.  2014 sept 20mg, 2014 oct 15mg, 2014 nov 10mg

2014 dec 7.5mg,  2014 dec 23rd crashed.  Dec 24th 10mg - trying to stabilize

2015 Jan Stabilized as much as thought I would, 2015 Jan 9mg, 2015 Late Feb, 8mg, 2015 late Mar 7mg.  22nd May 6.3mg

2015 small "slide" down to 6mg.  19th June 5mg. 15th Aug 4.5mg - slid down to 4mg.  Sept 20th 3.8mg.

2015 gradual decrease between Oct and Nov 10th to 3mg:  Dec between 3-2mg.  2016 Jan15th 2mg  Feb: 1.8mg, somewhere got to 1.6mg.

2016 Feb 25th crashed!  Not sure if sick or WD, back to 2mg.

2016 During March - gradual decrease to 1.8mg, then 1.5mg.  April 19th 1mg

2016 June 8th 0.8mg   July 1st 0.6mg:  Sept 0.4mg (long hold)

2017 Jan 0.2mg

2017 May 0!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  YAY

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  • Administrator

Given that making a reduction can rock the boat, you want to wait until you feel confident you can handle a little boat-rocking.

 

Done slow enough, tapering should cause minimal waves. If you're getting withdrawal symptoms, you're tapering too fast.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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Small update. Been ill with tonsilitis. But mood has been good. Getting glimpses of my old self popping up. Getting windows of feeling a bit more connected to my body and senses. Its nice.

2008 (approx) Lexapro 10mg.  2009 attempted cold turkey 5mg for 2 weeks - crash and burn.  2009 back on 10mg.

2012 - pooped out - but didn't know.   2014 - poop-out got worse.  2014 sept 20mg, 2014 oct 15mg, 2014 nov 10mg

2014 dec 7.5mg,  2014 dec 23rd crashed.  Dec 24th 10mg - trying to stabilize

2015 Jan Stabilized as much as thought I would, 2015 Jan 9mg, 2015 Late Feb, 8mg, 2015 late Mar 7mg.  22nd May 6.3mg

2015 small "slide" down to 6mg.  19th June 5mg. 15th Aug 4.5mg - slid down to 4mg.  Sept 20th 3.8mg.

2015 gradual decrease between Oct and Nov 10th to 3mg:  Dec between 3-2mg.  2016 Jan15th 2mg  Feb: 1.8mg, somewhere got to 1.6mg.

2016 Feb 25th crashed!  Not sure if sick or WD, back to 2mg.

2016 During March - gradual decrease to 1.8mg, then 1.5mg.  April 19th 1mg

2016 June 8th 0.8mg   July 1st 0.6mg:  Sept 0.4mg (long hold)

2017 Jan 0.2mg

2017 May 0!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  YAY

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Small update again.

Been feeling quite good and stable.

I felt ready to attempt another drop.

Have now started 8mg - 3 days in and I have to work out if I have withdrawals at all,.. maybe the slightest of tingling in fingers and feet, if I think about it, but otherwise, all ok.

I notice in my windows that I'm able to see how "medicated" I've been and STILL am.  In the waves, I lose that ability to even know.

Looking forward to getting myself off this stuff, but slow and steady.

2008 (approx) Lexapro 10mg.  2009 attempted cold turkey 5mg for 2 weeks - crash and burn.  2009 back on 10mg.

2012 - pooped out - but didn't know.   2014 - poop-out got worse.  2014 sept 20mg, 2014 oct 15mg, 2014 nov 10mg

2014 dec 7.5mg,  2014 dec 23rd crashed.  Dec 24th 10mg - trying to stabilize

2015 Jan Stabilized as much as thought I would, 2015 Jan 9mg, 2015 Late Feb, 8mg, 2015 late Mar 7mg.  22nd May 6.3mg

2015 small "slide" down to 6mg.  19th June 5mg. 15th Aug 4.5mg - slid down to 4mg.  Sept 20th 3.8mg.

2015 gradual decrease between Oct and Nov 10th to 3mg:  Dec between 3-2mg.  2016 Jan15th 2mg  Feb: 1.8mg, somewhere got to 1.6mg.

2016 Feb 25th crashed!  Not sure if sick or WD, back to 2mg.

2016 During March - gradual decrease to 1.8mg, then 1.5mg.  April 19th 1mg

2016 June 8th 0.8mg   July 1st 0.6mg:  Sept 0.4mg (long hold)

2017 Jan 0.2mg

2017 May 0!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  YAY

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Small update again.

Been feeling quite good and stable.

I felt ready to attempt another drop.

Have now started 8mg - 3 days in and I have to work out if I have withdrawals at all,.. maybe the slightest of tingling in fingers and feet, if I think about it, but otherwise, all ok.

I notice in my windows that I'm able to see how "medicated" I've been and STILL am.  In the waves, I lose that ability to even know.

Looking forward to getting myself off this stuff, but slow and steady.

 

Sounds like a plan! Slow and steady wins this race.

Hell hath no fury as an SSRI scorned.....

 

Prozac:   20 mg 1996 – May 2003 CT to 0 mg; by Aug 03 CRASH then protracted WD 3 yrs

Zoloft:    2004 few weeks;, CT to 0 mg

Effexor:  2005 few months CT to 0 mg; bad withdrawal. 

Lexapro:  10 mg from 2009 – 2011; cut dose in half to:

Lexapro:    5 mg from 2011 – Feb. 2014; CT to 0 mg; 2 months of fatigue, followed by:
Aug - Oct 2014 Lexapro WD Insomnia Wave; sleeping very good from Nov 2014 - Nov 2015; broken sleep pattern Dec 2015 - Jan 2016

Dec 2014 - present: Brutal Lexapro WD ear ringing/head ringing/head pressure lasting for 14 months now.

 

24 months SSRI-free  

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Hi Scott,

 

Just to say Hi and wecome as I found your thread only this moment.

 

We are on the same boat for the severe pain related symptoms. the worst and main suffering and difficulty for me both low and high dose of lexapro. they are so debalitating and unbearable all over my face/jaw/head/neck/shoulder/back plus needling sensation.

 

How are you feeling now about the pain? Have you found any pattern over time or during a day? Anything helped at all?

 

LexA

Drug free Sep. 23 2017

2009 Mar.: lexapro 10mg for headache for 2 weeks.

2009-2012: on and off 1/4 to 1/3 of 10mg

2012 June--2013 Jan,: 1/4-1/3 of 10mg generic, bad jaw pain

2013 Jan-Mar: 10 mg generic. severe jaw and head pain;

2013 Mar--Aug. started tapering (liquid ever since) from 10 to 5 (one step) then gradually down to 2.25 mg by July. first ever panic attack, severe head/jaw pain

2013 Aug.: back to 2.75 mg; Nov: back to Brand Lex. 2.75mg -- 3mg,

2014 June: stopped PPI, head pressure/numbness. up-dosed 4.5mg, severe reaction mental symptoms added on

2014 Aug--2015 Aug: Micro taper down to 3.2mg, .025mg (<1%) cut holding 2-3 weeks.

2015 Aug 15th, Accidental one dose of 4.2mg. worsening brain non-functional, swollen head, body, coma like, DR

2016 Feb., started dosing 10am through 11 pm everyday 2/13--3.2mg, 3/15-- 2.9mg, 4/19-- 2.6mg, 6/26--2.2mg, 7/22 --1.9mg, 8/16--1.8mg,8/31--1.7m g, 9/13--1.6mg, 9/27--1.5mg, 10/8--1.4mg, 10/14--1.3mg, 11/1--1.2mg, 11/29--1.1mg, 12/12--1mg, 12/22--0.9mg

2017: 1/7--0.8mg, 1/15--0.7mg, 1/17--0.6mg, 1/20--0.52, 1/21--0.4mg, 1/22--0.26, 1/23--0.2, 2/13--0.13mg, 2/20--0.06mg, 3/18--0.13mg, 6/1--0.12mg, 7/6--0.1mg, 7/14--0.08mg, 8/17--0.04mg, 8/20--0.03mg, 8/28--0.02mg, 9/6--0.0205mg, 9/8--0.02mg, 9/17--0.015mg, 9/20--0.01mg, 9/21--0.0048mg, 9/22--0.0001mg,

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Hi LexAnger.

Unfortunately, I didn't find anything that really helped with the pain.  Ibuprofen and codeine took the very slightest edge off.

I tried magnesium, fish oil, choline etc.

The ONLY real thing I found to help was back up to 10mg - wait 5 days or so, it slowly went away, and then my very slow taper of 1mg per drop.

I'm now about 6-7 days into my 8mg dose, and I did have slight tingling and pain in hands - similar to the hand going to sleep, sort of like pins and needles, but just slightly different.

I kept trying to "shake it out" get the blood flowing, but doesn't really help much.

Apart from the mild tingling, no other symptoms to even mention.

I'll hold this for 4 weeks - as I've noticed I tend to get a delay in severe mood dips.

2008 (approx) Lexapro 10mg.  2009 attempted cold turkey 5mg for 2 weeks - crash and burn.  2009 back on 10mg.

2012 - pooped out - but didn't know.   2014 - poop-out got worse.  2014 sept 20mg, 2014 oct 15mg, 2014 nov 10mg

2014 dec 7.5mg,  2014 dec 23rd crashed.  Dec 24th 10mg - trying to stabilize

2015 Jan Stabilized as much as thought I would, 2015 Jan 9mg, 2015 Late Feb, 8mg, 2015 late Mar 7mg.  22nd May 6.3mg

2015 small "slide" down to 6mg.  19th June 5mg. 15th Aug 4.5mg - slid down to 4mg.  Sept 20th 3.8mg.

2015 gradual decrease between Oct and Nov 10th to 3mg:  Dec between 3-2mg.  2016 Jan15th 2mg  Feb: 1.8mg, somewhere got to 1.6mg.

2016 Feb 25th crashed!  Not sure if sick or WD, back to 2mg.

2016 During March - gradual decrease to 1.8mg, then 1.5mg.  April 19th 1mg

2016 June 8th 0.8mg   July 1st 0.6mg:  Sept 0.4mg (long hold)

2017 Jan 0.2mg

2017 May 0!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  YAY

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Good you can stabilize at 8mg as you came down from 20 very fast.

Yeah, I tried everything, slow taper takes care of classical WD symptoms,but not the pain.

 

Stay hold at 8 for long is a good plan.

 

Hope you continue feeling well.

Drug free Sep. 23 2017

2009 Mar.: lexapro 10mg for headache for 2 weeks.

2009-2012: on and off 1/4 to 1/3 of 10mg

2012 June--2013 Jan,: 1/4-1/3 of 10mg generic, bad jaw pain

2013 Jan-Mar: 10 mg generic. severe jaw and head pain;

2013 Mar--Aug. started tapering (liquid ever since) from 10 to 5 (one step) then gradually down to 2.25 mg by July. first ever panic attack, severe head/jaw pain

2013 Aug.: back to 2.75 mg; Nov: back to Brand Lex. 2.75mg -- 3mg,

2014 June: stopped PPI, head pressure/numbness. up-dosed 4.5mg, severe reaction mental symptoms added on

2014 Aug--2015 Aug: Micro taper down to 3.2mg, .025mg (<1%) cut holding 2-3 weeks.

2015 Aug 15th, Accidental one dose of 4.2mg. worsening brain non-functional, swollen head, body, coma like, DR

2016 Feb., started dosing 10am through 11 pm everyday 2/13--3.2mg, 3/15-- 2.9mg, 4/19-- 2.6mg, 6/26--2.2mg, 7/22 --1.9mg, 8/16--1.8mg,8/31--1.7m g, 9/13--1.6mg, 9/27--1.5mg, 10/8--1.4mg, 10/14--1.3mg, 11/1--1.2mg, 11/29--1.1mg, 12/12--1mg, 12/22--0.9mg

2017: 1/7--0.8mg, 1/15--0.7mg, 1/17--0.6mg, 1/20--0.52, 1/21--0.4mg, 1/22--0.26, 1/23--0.2, 2/13--0.13mg, 2/20--0.06mg, 3/18--0.13mg, 6/1--0.12mg, 7/6--0.1mg, 7/14--0.08mg, 8/17--0.04mg, 8/20--0.03mg, 8/28--0.02mg, 9/6--0.0205mg, 9/8--0.02mg, 9/17--0.015mg, 9/20--0.01mg, 9/21--0.0048mg, 9/22--0.0001mg,

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Hi Scottly, glad to see that you are feeling stable now and have been able to start tapering. A word of caution, don't try to rush things, it will bite you on the butt! 

Dropping from 10 to 9 was a 10% drop but then dropping another 1mg was more than 10%. We recommend no more than 10% of the current dose to avoid withdrawal symptoms. As the dose gets lower the cut gets lower too. 

 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1024-why-taper-by-10-of-my-dosage/. It seems that you have some slight withdrawal symptoms now so you need to hold until those symptoms have settled down and been stable for a while.  You are doing great and I hope you don't get too many waves along the way  :)

**I am not a medical professional, if in doubt please consult a doctor with withdrawal knowledge.

 

 

Different drugs occasionally (mostly benzos) 1976 - 1981 (no problem)

1993 - 2002 in and out of hospital. every type of drug + ECT. Staring with seroxat

2002  effexor. 

Tapered  March 2012 to March 2013, ending with 5 beads.

Withdrawal April 2013 . Reinstated 5 beads reduced to 4 beads May 2013

Restarted taper  Nov 2013  

OFF EFFEXOR Feb 2015    :D 

Tapered atenolol and omeprazole Dec 2013 - May 2014

 

Tapering tramadol, Feb 2015 100mg , March 2015 50mg  

 July 2017 30mg.  May 15 2018 25mg

Taking fish oil, magnesium, B12, folic acid, bilberry eyebright for eye pressure. 

 

My story http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4199-hello-mammap-checking-in/page-33

 

Lesson learned, slow down taper at lower doses. Taper no more than 10% of CURRENT dose if possible

 

 

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Really appreciate all the comments and suggestions, even sharing your own struggles. Thank you.

getting slightly mkre tingling in hands, but nothing I cant cope with.

 

Went to get a repeat of the liquid, turns out they stopped making the exact one I started!

only now doing 20mg / 1ml.

argh, they make this hard dont they?

have to half the liquid amount now.

2008 (approx) Lexapro 10mg.  2009 attempted cold turkey 5mg for 2 weeks - crash and burn.  2009 back on 10mg.

2012 - pooped out - but didn't know.   2014 - poop-out got worse.  2014 sept 20mg, 2014 oct 15mg, 2014 nov 10mg

2014 dec 7.5mg,  2014 dec 23rd crashed.  Dec 24th 10mg - trying to stabilize

2015 Jan Stabilized as much as thought I would, 2015 Jan 9mg, 2015 Late Feb, 8mg, 2015 late Mar 7mg.  22nd May 6.3mg

2015 small "slide" down to 6mg.  19th June 5mg. 15th Aug 4.5mg - slid down to 4mg.  Sept 20th 3.8mg.

2015 gradual decrease between Oct and Nov 10th to 3mg:  Dec between 3-2mg.  2016 Jan15th 2mg  Feb: 1.8mg, somewhere got to 1.6mg.

2016 Feb 25th crashed!  Not sure if sick or WD, back to 2mg.

2016 During March - gradual decrease to 1.8mg, then 1.5mg.  April 19th 1mg

2016 June 8th 0.8mg   July 1st 0.6mg:  Sept 0.4mg (long hold)

2017 Jan 0.2mg

2017 May 0!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  YAY

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Hi Scottly,

 

So am I right in saying you used to take 1ml and that was equivalent to 10mg, now if you take 1ml that will be equivalent to 20mg?

 

If so, you can get 1 ml syringes to measure .5 or you could ask if you can water down the liquid so that 1ml still equals 10.  I suggest this because the more concentrated it is the more a dose can vary if its a little above or below the line and as you get further down it gets difficult to taper smaller amounts.

 

Just a thought and I hope I have understood what's happened correctly

 

D

Please note - I am not a medical practitioner and I do not give medical advice. I offer an opinion based on my own experiences, reading and discussion with others.On Effexor for 2 months at the start of 2005. Had extreme insomnia as an adverse reaction. Changed to mirtazapine. Have been trying to get off since mid 2008 with numerous failures including CTs and slow (but not slow enough tapers)Have slow tapered at 10 per cent or less for years. I have liquid mirtazapine made at a compounding chemist.

Was on 1.6 ml as at 19 March 2014.

Dropped to 1.5 ml 7 June 2014. Dropped to 1.4 in about September.

Dropped to 1.3 on 20 December 2014. Dropped to 1.2 in mid Jan 2015.

Dropped to 1 ml in late Feb 2015. I think my old medication had run out of puff so I tried 1ml when I got the new stuff and it seems to be going ok. Sleep has been good over the last week (as of 13/3/15).

Dropped to 1/2 ml 14/11/15 Fatigue still there as are memory and cognition problems. Sleep is patchy but liveable compared to what it has been in the past.

 

DRUG FREE - as at 1st May 2017

 

>My intro post is here - http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/2250-dalsaan

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Hi Dalsaan,

 

I'm currently on 8mg in my taper.

I take half of a 10mg tablet (5mg) and then the required smaller amount in liquid... currently .3 ml to get 3mg.

So I'll need to take .15 of a ml to get the 3mg on the new bottle.

It's doable, but just tricker.

It comes with an oral syringe to measure the amounts... but what I don't get is the measurement starts on the solid part of the syringe, it doesn't include the tapered bit that goes into the bottle.

So depending on what pressure you push the liquid out, you MIGHT get that extra bit, and now with the double-strength liquid, that might be included.

I tend to have a mouthful of water, and tilt my head back and squirt it straight into the mouth - taste is terrible, almost like you're not supposed to ingest it.

2008 (approx) Lexapro 10mg.  2009 attempted cold turkey 5mg for 2 weeks - crash and burn.  2009 back on 10mg.

2012 - pooped out - but didn't know.   2014 - poop-out got worse.  2014 sept 20mg, 2014 oct 15mg, 2014 nov 10mg

2014 dec 7.5mg,  2014 dec 23rd crashed.  Dec 24th 10mg - trying to stabilize

2015 Jan Stabilized as much as thought I would, 2015 Jan 9mg, 2015 Late Feb, 8mg, 2015 late Mar 7mg.  22nd May 6.3mg

2015 small "slide" down to 6mg.  19th June 5mg. 15th Aug 4.5mg - slid down to 4mg.  Sept 20th 3.8mg.

2015 gradual decrease between Oct and Nov 10th to 3mg:  Dec between 3-2mg.  2016 Jan15th 2mg  Feb: 1.8mg, somewhere got to 1.6mg.

2016 Feb 25th crashed!  Not sure if sick or WD, back to 2mg.

2016 During March - gradual decrease to 1.8mg, then 1.5mg.  April 19th 1mg

2016 June 8th 0.8mg   July 1st 0.6mg:  Sept 0.4mg (long hold)

2017 Jan 0.2mg

2017 May 0!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  YAY

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  • 4 weeks later...

Hi Guys

Just a short update.

TL/DR - started 7mg as of today.

nearly run out of 10mg / 1ml liquid.

I've found a way of swapping the lid of the 2 bottles so aiming to start with oral syringe on new bottle when needed...  and to answer the question asked above, yes 1ml is now 20mg!

How insane is that?  Just makes it tricker to get it right.  The whole point of liquid is to get off this stuff.

 

I went through a period of multiple mouth ulcers (canker sores I think you call them in the States..?), and felt VERY lethargic.  I don't THINK it was related... as other members of my family had it too... so that delayed my drop to 7mg.

I do understand that 8mg to 7mg is faster than 10%.

I've been a bit unwell as stated, and just had a hectic business trip to Perth to deal with too.

So delayed my drop until today.

 

This post is mostly about recording the day I started 7mg... and see how I travel.

 

Good luck to others still battling through!

2008 (approx) Lexapro 10mg.  2009 attempted cold turkey 5mg for 2 weeks - crash and burn.  2009 back on 10mg.

2012 - pooped out - but didn't know.   2014 - poop-out got worse.  2014 sept 20mg, 2014 oct 15mg, 2014 nov 10mg

2014 dec 7.5mg,  2014 dec 23rd crashed.  Dec 24th 10mg - trying to stabilize

2015 Jan Stabilized as much as thought I would, 2015 Jan 9mg, 2015 Late Feb, 8mg, 2015 late Mar 7mg.  22nd May 6.3mg

2015 small "slide" down to 6mg.  19th June 5mg. 15th Aug 4.5mg - slid down to 4mg.  Sept 20th 3.8mg.

2015 gradual decrease between Oct and Nov 10th to 3mg:  Dec between 3-2mg.  2016 Jan15th 2mg  Feb: 1.8mg, somewhere got to 1.6mg.

2016 Feb 25th crashed!  Not sure if sick or WD, back to 2mg.

2016 During March - gradual decrease to 1.8mg, then 1.5mg.  April 19th 1mg

2016 June 8th 0.8mg   July 1st 0.6mg:  Sept 0.4mg (long hold)

2017 Jan 0.2mg

2017 May 0!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  YAY

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Just a thought about the titration. Would it be easier to dilute the 1 ml first to make it 10 ml (20 mg) by adding 9 ml water then take 4

ml out which gives you 8 mg?

Drug free Sep. 23 2017

2009 Mar.: lexapro 10mg for headache for 2 weeks.

2009-2012: on and off 1/4 to 1/3 of 10mg

2012 June--2013 Jan,: 1/4-1/3 of 10mg generic, bad jaw pain

2013 Jan-Mar: 10 mg generic. severe jaw and head pain;

2013 Mar--Aug. started tapering (liquid ever since) from 10 to 5 (one step) then gradually down to 2.25 mg by July. first ever panic attack, severe head/jaw pain

2013 Aug.: back to 2.75 mg; Nov: back to Brand Lex. 2.75mg -- 3mg,

2014 June: stopped PPI, head pressure/numbness. up-dosed 4.5mg, severe reaction mental symptoms added on

2014 Aug--2015 Aug: Micro taper down to 3.2mg, .025mg (<1%) cut holding 2-3 weeks.

2015 Aug 15th, Accidental one dose of 4.2mg. worsening brain non-functional, swollen head, body, coma like, DR

2016 Feb., started dosing 10am through 11 pm everyday 2/13--3.2mg, 3/15-- 2.9mg, 4/19-- 2.6mg, 6/26--2.2mg, 7/22 --1.9mg, 8/16--1.8mg,8/31--1.7m g, 9/13--1.6mg, 9/27--1.5mg, 10/8--1.4mg, 10/14--1.3mg, 11/1--1.2mg, 11/29--1.1mg, 12/12--1mg, 12/22--0.9mg

2017: 1/7--0.8mg, 1/15--0.7mg, 1/17--0.6mg, 1/20--0.52, 1/21--0.4mg, 1/22--0.26, 1/23--0.2, 2/13--0.13mg, 2/20--0.06mg, 3/18--0.13mg, 6/1--0.12mg, 7/6--0.1mg, 7/14--0.08mg, 8/17--0.04mg, 8/20--0.03mg, 8/28--0.02mg, 9/6--0.0205mg, 9/8--0.02mg, 9/17--0.015mg, 9/20--0.01mg, 9/21--0.0048mg, 9/22--0.0001mg,

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