Cheeky: on Paxil for 23 years needing advice

[Hazel]

Hi Cheeky,

glad to hear you are feeling better.  I have been doing much better myself.  I would guess you may want to make your next drop even smaller.  Not sure what percent, but I’m sure there are others who can better advise.  Thankfully now you can enjoy the holidays and give yourself a nice little break from tapering 😊

[Cheeky]

4 hours ago, Hazel said:

Hi Cheeky,

glad to hear you are feeling better.  I have been doing much better myself.  I would guess you may want to make your next drop even smaller.  Not sure what percent, but I’m sure there are others who can better advise.  Thankfully now you can enjoy the holidays and give yourself a nice little break from tapering 😊

Thanks Hazel,

im happy your feeling better too. In the new year will start again

[Songbird]

On 11/22/2017 at 3:54 PM, Cheeky said:

I have just realized that in this year I have gotten off 10mg's of my medications so I suppose that's to be proud off, I just hope I can continue going in the right direction.

Just a question, what seems to be the pattern when tapering or is it different for everybody?

 

 

Absolutely it is something to be proud of!  In my book every drop is an achievement.

 

Tapering patterns can vary a lot between individuals, and even for the same person at different parts of the taper.  This can make it difficult to figure out a tapering schedule, but in general it's better to be on the cautious side rather than be in a rush.  A week and a half for w/d effects to show up after a drop is very "normal" (as far as there is such a thing), and 4 to 6 weeks to stabilise again is also pretty normal.  Personally I would never drop before 4 weeks as I've had w/d symptoms show up quite late, e.g. 3 and a half weeks after a drop.  Over time you'll work out what works for you.  Instead of a strict schedule, I think it's good to make a general plan but be flexible because there may be times when you want to hold a bit longer.  Listen to what your body is telling you and then adapt accordingly. 

[Songbird]

.

 

[Cheeky]

53 minutes ago, Songbird said:

 

Absolutely it is something to be proud of!  In my book every drop is an achievement.

 

Tapering patterns can vary a lot between individuals, and even for the same person at different parts of the taper.  This can make it difficult to figure out a tapering schedule, but in general it's better to be on the cautious side rather than be in a rush.  A week and a half for w/d effects to show up after a drop is very "normal" (as far as there is such a thing), and 4 to 6 weeks to stabilise again is also pretty normal.  Personally I would never drop before 4 weeks as I've had w/d symptoms show up quite late, e.g. 3 and a half weeks after a drop.  Over time you'll work out what works for you.  Instead of a strict schedule, I think it's good to make a general plan but be flexible because there may be times when you want to hold a bit longer.  Listen to what your body is telling you and then adapt accordingly. 

Thankyou Songbird,

I think i will wait till the new year as Im still not feeling 100%.

[Cheeky]

Just a question, Do you feel better as you get lower in doses, like more back to your old self once you stabilize . I just hate feeling tired and unmotivated all the time and want my passion back, sometimes I feel like a walking donkey.

 

I'm going to do my tapper again in the new year and I'm not sure what drug to taper first. Should I continue with the Paxil or should I do more off the Seraquel or a bit from both. Just not sure, advice would be appreciated

 

[DaveB]

Hi Cheeky! Just stumbled across your thread and noticed our similarities. Only I was on Zoloft for 8 1/2 years and now on Paxil. Do you think your switch from Zoloft to Paxil was the right move, or do you think you could have stabilized on the Zoloft. I am still struggling trying to stabilize on Paxil which I started June 1st, but I haven't kept my dose stable through my time on the Paxil. Just wondering if you would recommend me going back to Zoloft like you did on Paxil, or if it was just a matter of stabilizing over time. 

[Cheeky]

8 hours ago, DaveB said:

Hi Cheeky! Just stumbled across your thread and noticed our similarities. Only I was on Zoloft for 8 1/2 years and now on Paxil. Do you think your switch from Zoloft to Paxil was the right move, or do you think you could have stabilized on the Zoloft. I am still struggling trying to stabilize on Paxil which I started June 1st, but I haven't kept my dose stable through my time on the Paxil. Just wondering if you would recommend me going back to Zoloft like you did on Paxil, or if it was just a matter of stabilizing over time. 

Hey Dave, to be honest maybe I couldv'e with the added Seraquel ,if I had given it time or maybe not. My reasoning to going back on was that I has been on Paxil a very long time and didn't wont to get withdrawals from that while on the Zoloft  and I had read alot of people not having success doing it the other way.

If I were you I would go back on the zoloft because that is what your brain is used to and you just want to have stability in life.

It amazes me  that they did the same thing to you with the Zprexa, if I had of know in was a  anti-psychotic drug I would off never off taken it, I thought it was a sleeping aid.

I'm so sorry you have to go through this like I did but keep in touch and we can conquer this together.

[DaveB]

On ‎11‎/‎28‎/‎2017 at 7:37 PM, Cheeky said:

Hey Dave, to be honest maybe I couldv'e with the added Seraquel ,if I had given it time or maybe not. My reasoning to going back on was that I has been on Paxil a very long time and didn't wont to get withdrawals from that while on the Zoloft  and I had read alot of people not having success doing it the other way.

If I were you I would go back on the zoloft because that is what your brain is used to and you just want to have stability in life.

It amazes me  that they did the same thing to you with the Zprexa, if I had of know in was a  anti-psychotic drug I would off never off taken it, I thought it was a sleeping aid.

I'm so sorry you have to go through this like I did but keep in touch and we can conquer this together.

 

Thanks Cheeky, I like the suggestion of conquering this together. I have been on such a ride this year, I am just hoping to stabilize at some point. Looks like the advice of SA and my wife is to stay on Paxil and try to stabilize (I kind of agree with you though on the Zoloft haha). Many times every day I get a window where I feel like I am for sure making progress and stabilization is just around the corner, then I get hit by another wave and I feel I am just kidding myself and I will never feel like myself again. Have you experienced anything like that? Seems like for most people they talk of "windows and waves" as in days or weeks, mine seem to be in terms of hours, like 3 good, 2 bad, 1 good, 3 bad. It is weird and frustrating!

[Cheeky]

4 hours ago, DaveB said:

 

Thanks Cheeky, I like the suggestion of conquering this together. I have been on such a ride this year, I am just hoping to stabilize at some point. Looks like the advice of SA and my wife is to stay on Paxil and try to stabilize (I kind of agree with you though on the Zoloft haha). Many times every day I get a window where I feel like I am for sure making progress and stabilization is just around the corner, then I get hit by another wave and I feel I am just kidding myself and I will never feel like myself again. Have you experienced anything like that? Seems like for most people they talk of "windows and waves" as in days or weeks, mine seem to be in terms of hours, like 3 good, 2 bad, 1 good, 3 bad. It is weird and frustrating!

100% DaveB. Windows and Waves for me was the same, for a few hours you feel like your going to be okay then BAM a wave again. It’s not uncommon for this to happen, so your experiences to this is normal . 

Dont do any changes for a good few months to let things settle down with your CNS. I know that when your feeling awful you just won’t to get this drug out of your system, but unfortunately that is not how it works . Slow Is the  key .

Your not going to be alone in this journey and my advice is to just ride those waves and know your only feeling like that because your brain has been through alot of changes. 

[Songbird]

On 11/28/2017 at 3:56 PM, Cheeky said:

Just a question, Do you feel better as you get lower in doses, like more back to your old self once you stabilize . I just hate feeling tired and unmotivated all the time and want my passion back, sometimes I feel like a walking donkey.

 

I'm going to do my tapper again in the new year and I'm not sure what drug to taper first. Should I continue with the Paxil or should I do more off the Seraquel or a bit from both. Just not sure, advice would be appreciated

 

 

Generally I feel better as I get lower in dose.  I don't know about back to my old self, to be honest after all these years I'm not even sure who/what my old self is/was any more.  I think after all this time I'm another, different self now.

 

As for how to continue your taper - one problem I can think of with tapering both at the same time is that it's hard to tell which drug reduction is the cause of your symptoms.  Personally I would be trying to get off the Seroquel, as it is very sedating, and could be a big contributor to your feeling tired and unmotivated all the time.  But if you feel that the way you've been tapering has been working well for you, then you may want to continue that way.

[grandmaD]

I would agree with Songbird to taper the Seroquel first, especially if you had been taking it every day.

 

I am only basing this on what a doctor said  - I only ever saw her once and she left - and I am not a great fan of doctors, but she was the only one out of 8 doctors who ever said anti-depressants are not the answer, but counselling should be the first line!  Then when I told her my usual doctor said to take the sleeping pills I was on,  every day, she nearly fell off her chair and exclaimed "it is a benzo, get off it asap!  It is much safer long term to be on an a/d."

 

I think the thinking with my usual doctor is that it is better to be on an anti-anxiety to help with a/d withdrawal.  You might want to research and find out if being on a benzo actually DOES help with a/d withdrawal.

 

That's my 2 cents worth, but Hope you can find a good resolution, I know it is so difficult making these decisions.

[Cheeky]

Just a question ? Do you feel better as you get lower in doses, like more back to your old self once you stabilize . I just hate feeling tired and unmotivated all the time and want my passion back, sometimes I feel like a walking donkey.

I'm going to do another taper in the next 2 weeks, last drop wasn't too bad, I think it was because I dropped 0.5mg for three weeks then another 0.5mg after that and have stay on that another three weeks.

I'm not sure weather to drop my Serequel next by 1mg or continue the paxil tapper by another 0.5mg for three  weeks. Any suggestions would be appreciated . I know that its the seraquel that is making me soo tired during the day and I need the energy to work and look after my kids.

 

[SkyBlue]

Hi Cheeky,

Yes, once I get through symptoms the lower I get on Paxil, the better I feel. You have a lot to look forward to!

[WackoSirJacko]

16 hours ago, SkyBlue said:

Hi Cheeky,

Yes, once I get through symptoms the lower I get on Paxil, the better I feel. You have a lot to look forward to!

Hi SkyBlue

 

This is what I wanted to hear. Thank you so much!  Even going from 45 to 37.5 I can slightly tell.

 

Cheeky, Hope you are well duck? (I'm from Stoke in England, we call people duck for some reason). Paxil has a histamine blocker in, which I think is a big tiredness inducer and depressant. I'd say drops in either drug will slowly give you more energy. Psychologically speaking, If it were me, I'd drop one for a while, then the other for a while, then back to the other. But set targets, so you are on 35mg Paxil, swop to Seroquel and get that down to say 30mg, then swop and get Paxil down to 30, and so on.

For 2 reasons:

1. Giving your brain a good long rest from dropping the Paxil is no bad thing, then deal with Seroquel and giving that a staged long rest will be no bad thing.

2. If in the future you are at 10mg of Paxil but still 36mg of Seroquel, there's still a big mountain of Seroquel to climb looming over you. Plus if you need to up one or the other because you get really bad, a climb in one when the other has lowered over time would give me more positives to concentrate on when I feel defeated about the reinstatement.

 

But that's just me personally

 

[Cheeky]

21 hours ago, SkyBlue said:

Hi Cheeky,

Yes, once I get through symptoms the lower I get on Paxil, the better I feel. You have a lot to look forward to!

great to hear, I really want to feel better again.

[Cheeky]

5 hours ago, WackoSirJacko said:

Hi SkyBlue

 

This is what I wanted to hear. Thank you so much!  Even going from 45 to 37.5 I can slightly tell.

 

Cheeky, Hope you are well duck? (I'm from Stoke in England, we call people duck for some reason). Paxil has a histamine blocker in, which I think is a big tiredness inducer and depressant. I'd say drops in either drug will slowly give you more energy. Psychologically speaking, If it were me, I'd drop one for a while, then the other for a while, then back to the other. But set targets, so you are on 35mg Paxil, swop to Seroquel and get that down to say 30mg, then swop and get Paxil down to 30, and so on.

For 2 reasons:

1. Giving your brain a good long rest from dropping the Paxil is no bad thing, then deal with Seroquel and giving that a staged long rest will be no bad thing.

2. If in the future you are at 10mg of Paxil but still 36mg of Seroquel, there's still a big mountain of Seroquel to climb looming over you. Plus if you need to up one or the other because you get really bad, a climb in one when the other has lowered over time would give me more positives to concentrate on when I feel defeated about the reinstatement.

 

But that's just me personally

 

Thanks Wacko Head ( thats the slang we use in Aussie Land)

I think that is wise and will follow that. Great suggestion

[SkyBlue]

On 2/8/2018 at 4:11 PM, Cheeky said:

great to hear, I really want to feel better again.

You're welcome. You will feel better again. 

[Cheeky]

Hi everyone,

feeling a little disheartened today and feel like giving up on this taper. I dropped my dose 4 weeks ago and been having really good days then Bam a few bad days. I cant seem to work out a pattern to my drops and feel like I'm on a rollar coaster. I dont know if I should even continue this, I'm so worried about losing everything I have worked so hard for and not being a functional mother to my kids. 

If I knew the end result would be the old me again I would continue, I feel like I've been on these drugs way too long to ever be able to get off them and live a normal life. Being on them I feel unmotivated , tired all the time and my memory is getting so bad. I'm feeling down today and I'm worry  when feeling like this that I wont stablize again.

Everybody seems to take there drops from the higher does easy and I'm not sure why I'm having a hard time doing this.

If only I could wake up and have none of this ever happen to me and medication free.

Is this what you call windows and waves ? will I eventually stabilize ?

[Hazel]

Hi Cheeky,

just read your post and wanted to let you know you are not alone.  I am having a hard time of it lately too and often feel like giving up on the idea of ever getting off these meds.  I also want to be able to be like my old self and be a good mom for my kids.  I want to enjoy my time with them and not have withdrawal constantly hanging over my head.  I think this is the windows and waves everyone talks about. I agree that it would be easier if we knew in the end we would be back to our old selves, but it’s hard to believe that when feeling bad.  I hope this wave passes for you soon.  I have to believe that eventually we do stabilize.

Hazel

[Cheeky]

1 hour ago, Hazel said:

Hi Cheeky,

just read your post and wanted to let you know you are not alone.  I am having a hard time of it lately too and often feel like giving up on the idea of ever getting off these meds.  I also want to be able to be like my old self and be a good mom for my kids.  I want to enjoy my time with them and not have withdrawal constantly hanging over my head.  I think this is the windows and waves everyone talks about. I agree that it would be easier if we knew in the end we would be back to our old selves, but it’s hard to believe that when feeling bad.  I hope this wave passes for you soon.  I have to believe that eventually we do stabilize.

Hazel

Thankyou Hazel for your kind words, I really pray that there will be help for us one day and that what where going through gets acknowledgment. My children are my world and I have a wonderful life, these drugs have caused so much suffering. How are you going on your taper ?

[Cheeky]

If an admin could help out I would really appreciate it .

[DMV64]

Hi Cheeky!

You are sooooo not alone. I have felt like giving up, especially in the mornings when it is harder for me. I know it is windows and waves but it is hard to just BE with that sometimes when I so much want to feel just OK, to be present. I am hoping you are feeling better.

<3

-D

[Hazel]

1 hour ago, Cheeky said:

Thankyou Hazel for your kind words, I really pray that there will be help for us one day and that what where going through gets acknowledgment. My children are my world and I have a wonderful life, these drugs have caused so much suffering. How are you going on your taper ?

I have been holding at 7.5 mg since early January and don’t see myself tapering any time soon.  At least not if I continue to feel the way I have been.

[Cheeky]

33 minutes ago, Hazel said:

I have been holding at 7.5 mg since early January and don’t see myself tapering any time soon.  At least not if I continue to feel the way I have been.

Yeah I think I'm going to do the same, I just hope i can feel better soon.

I wish I was at 7.5mg , its a small dose, you will be okay, we can all do this together.

[Cheeky]

1 hour ago, DMV64 said:

Hi Cheeky!

You are sooooo not alone. I have felt like giving up, especially in the mornings when it is harder for me. I know it is windows and waves but it is hard to just BE with that sometimes when I so much want to feel just OK, to be present. I am hoping you are feeling better.

<3

-D

Thankyou for the support it makes so much difference.

[DMV64]

How are you feeling today? I woke up with mild panic but so far it is not as bad as yesterday. Hope it continues this way!

[Cheeky]

7 hours ago, DMV64 said:

How are you feeling today? I woke up with mild panic but so far it is not as bad as yesterday. Hope it continues this way!

Thanks for asking, for me the normal aniexty. Let’s see how today goes 

[Songbird]

On 2/20/2018 at 12:08 PM, Cheeky said:

Hi everyone,

feeling a little disheartened today and feel like giving up on this taper. I dropped my dose 4 weeks ago and been having really good days then Bam a few bad days. I cant seem to work out a pattern to my drops and feel like I'm on a rollar coaster. I dont know if I should even continue this, I'm so worried about losing everything I have worked so hard for and not being a functional mother to my kids. 

If I knew the end result would be the old me again I would continue, I feel like I've been on these drugs way too long to ever be able to get off them and live a normal life. Being on them I feel unmotivated , tired all the time and my memory is getting so bad. I'm feeling down today and I'm worry  when feeling like this that I wont stablize again.

Everybody seems to take there drops from the higher does easy and I'm not sure why I'm having a hard time doing this.

If only I could wake up and have none of this ever happen to me and medication free.

Is this what you call windows and waves ? will I eventually stabilize ?

 

Hi Cheeky, it's been 4 weeks, hang in there a while longer, it can take some time to restabilise after a dose drop.  The difficult dose range varies between individuals, and I think could depend on what dose you were mostly taking the years you were on it.  It doesn't necessarily mean the entire taper will be the same.  I know it's hard, but try to be patient and give your system some more time to sort out this drop.

[WackoSirJacko]

14 hours ago, Cheeky said:

Thanks for asking, for me the normal aniexty. Let’s see how today goes 

I'm having a problem at 35mg too Cheeky. From 45mg to 37.5mg the drops were relatively easy in comparison. I'm thinking that at 35mg something opens up, like the sedation effect stops, or it stops hitting something so heavy. Or it's the first sign of feeling the tiniest of emotions that we haven't felt for a long time. My brain feels hollow, then buzzing, then happy, then weepy and then my anxiety increases and lowers. Or it could be the first big wave from my drop from 45mg that's built up this time. The proof that we will stabilize though is all on these pages. Let's try to concentrate on other things for now and I'm sure our brains will find a level.

 

Could do with some BrassMonkey words right now?

[DMV64]

Hi Cheeky!

Checking in on you. How are you? I had a bad day yesterday, but today is starting out to feel a little better. Woke up to some financial worries, but managed to not get caught obsessing about it. Going to practice F L O A T I N G through anxiety.

<3

-D

[Cheeky]

Hey D,

so far so good, I just hope it can stay like this. I’m happy your feeling  better , financial worries is something I think about often too. I work full time and have a business in Sydney Australia and my income pays my mortgage, so no income loss house. That’s why I need to be stable.

This really has changed my life and makes me appreciate life so much more.

we can do this together.

Thanks for thinking about me 

[Cheeky]

12 hours ago, Songbird said:

 

Hi Cheeky, it's been 4 weeks, hang in there a while longer, it can take some time to restabilise after a dose drop.  The difficult dose range varies between individuals, and I think could depend on what dose you were mostly taking the years you were on it.  It doesn't necessarily mean the entire taper will be the same.  I know it's hard, but try to be patient and give your system some more time to sort out this drop.

Thanks Songbird,

your words always makes me feel better. I am going to wait that's for sure, give my brain a break.

[Cheeky]

12 hours ago, WackoSirJacko said:

I'm having a problem at 35mg too Cheeky. From 45mg to 37.5mg the drops were relatively easy in comparison. I'm thinking that at 35mg something opens up, like the sedation effect stops, or it stops hitting something so heavy. Or it's the first sign of feeling the tiniest of emotions that we haven't felt for a long time. My brain feels hollow, then buzzing, then happy, then weepy and then my anxiety increases and lowers. Or it could be the first big wave from my drop from 45mg that's built up this time. The proof that we will stabilize though is all on these pages. Let's try to concentrate on other things for now and I'm sure our brains will find a level.

 

Could do with some BrassMonkey words right now?

Yes definitely feeling the same. Like a rollar coaster of emotions. My biggest worry is never being stable, but I've had that worry before when i was in a wave then when I'm normal I forget about that.

[WackoSirJacko]

10 hours ago, Cheeky said:

Yes definitely feeling the same. Like a rollar coaster of emotions. My biggest worry is never being stable, but I've had that worry before when i was in a wave then when I'm normal I forget about that.

Exactly, the worry exacerbates the effects, this is where CBT comes in. Have you read up on CBT? Do yourself a massive favour and spend your time learning those practices to take your mind off of this. It takes AGES for the practice of CBT to come into affect but it slowly gets absorbed by your brain and does change your mindset against it. I've found I can now destract my mind a lot easier than before and bat away the negative thoughts easier than when I started. It essentially halves the problem I reckon and on such a long time frame like this, it's very important. Where are you from Cheeky? 

[Cheeky]

On 22/02/2018 at 9:23 PM, WackoSirJacko said:

Exactly, the worry exacerbates the effects, this is where CBT comes in. Have you read up on CBT? Do yourself a massive favour and spend your time learning those practices to take your mind off of this. It takes AGES for the practice of CBT to come into affect but it slowly gets absorbed by your brain and does change your mindset against it. I've found I can now destract my mind a lot easier than before and bat away the negative thoughts easier than when I started. It essentially halves the problem I reckon and on such a long time frame like this, it's very important. Where are you from Cheeky? 

Thanks for the advice SWJ, I am really trying to do that at the moment, yesterday for a good day today I’m crying and am field with aniexty , it comes in waves & windows .

To answer your last question, I’m from Sydney Australia, married for 17 years and have two beautiful boys, a 15 year old and 6 year old . I run a Hairdressing business  with my husband  , so it’s really hard acting like your all normal when you feel like dying inside. 

Where are you from?