☼ Martina23: Lyrica

[Martina23]

So today I got to know that this patient agency which had to prove if I was harmed by Lyrica made everything wrong. Today I heard from independent person that they didnt have to bring psychiatrist expert but pharmacologist. So they did everything wrong. I can throw all their work away. Funny. 

 

 

I hope everybody is happy and ok and have a lot of love, health and respect in their life. We earn it - for fighting so hard- all of us.

 

We are true heroes- all of us for what we went through and that we didnt give up.

[Martina23]

Oh, I was today by the dentist and he gave me there something bitter, which tastes terribly like menthol, I felt it the whole supper, really to vomit. Now I dont know what to do, I hate such taste in the mouth, I dont know if I shouldnt go to the hospital to put it away.

[Martina23]

I like these autumn evenings, we are always watching stories with children, I was painting today, actually nice day.

 

But it still makes me nervous these doctors how they all said there is no withdrawal all my problems were my recurring illness. I wish I knew what these people really think when they say such lies.

 

Today I painted a woman from the side. But the feet still look terrible:-)

 

Everybody thinks about us that we are loonies just that we said there is withdrawal.  It is so weird and inbelievable.

 

I wish I had now someone to talk about. These evenings are for me hard  sometimes. They are so lonely.

[Martina23]

I am already at home and sitting here. Today I read one article in the newspaper where they wrote that one hospital treated one little boy who had constipation and they gave him six clysters and nothing more and he started already to vomit blood and stool and afterwards died. And the office for health care said the hospital didnt do any failure. So it is like always - they didnt do any failure only the boy died.

[Lilabella]

Dear Martina

Everyone says to me it is my original illness but I was made ill by sleeping pills. I only had three nights if sleeplessness..I should never have taken them . Now I am on Quetiapine and have to taper off. I was given it to help.with sleep, and I wasn't told ANYTHING about it other than that. 

 It is totally unbelievable, like you are being made mad. 

I know how lonely it is and how incredibly hard it is with young children, I have a son who is six. It is terribly hard to feel so much like I have been changed by this experience. I worry for my son. 

I hope you can get through this. Know that you are not alone, I really understand the feelings of loneliness and fear you talk about. 

Love lilabella 

[Martina23]

I dont know when it was last time when I saw a really good film like Out of Africa. Now the only one who is watching TV are children. I wished I could watch some of my films too. I put down contact lenses (I have -7 diaoptrines) so the whole world is a bit blurry. But in some way it is soothing. I  can enjoy the evening (i dont see anything) and not always work.

[Martina23]

I decided to write a new book: Stories from the psychiatries/Geschichten von den Psychiatrien  where I want to highlight that the psychiatries are nowadays the last place where the NAZI like conditions are still valid. I want to compile this book as stories of the people who experienced terrible conditions in the state psychiatries (with no serious illness) and I kindly ask anyone who had such terrible experience from psychiatry (with no serious illness) and wants to have their experience be heard and  placed in a book (for free) to share the experience with me  so that  these unhuman conditions can be written in a book and a change can be reached.

 

[Martina23]

1 hour ago, Martina23 said:

I decided to write a new book: Stories from the psychiatries/Geschichten von den Psychiatrien  where I want to highlight that the psychiatries are nowadays the last place where the NAZI like conditions are still valid. I want to compile this book as stories of the people who experienced terrible conditions in the state psychiatries (with no serious illness) and I kindly ask anyone who had such terrible experience from psychiatry (with no serious illness) and wants to have their experience be heard and  placed in a book (for free) to share the experience with me  so that  these unhuman conditions can be written in a book and a change can be reached.

 

The best would be experiences from all continents.

[Martina23]

I think if it goes than from each continent I would like to make 2-3 stories, like also from Africa, Asia, US etc. I think it will be very interesting. Mainly how these psychiatries look like in each continent. I hope I get some stories as this could be really very interesting (for me).

[Martina23]

 

Hello, for everyone my (today's) favourite song.

 

I find that idea of book about various psychiatries like in Laos, Vietnam, Nord Korea, Europe, US, Africa really very interesting. I am the person who loves traveling and discovering new places. I think it is more fulfilling than anything else.

 

I hope I find stories about these places and also how it looks like there. I tell myself there are projects which take long time sometimes also 10 years, it doesnt have to be immediately.

[Martina23]

I am a bit afraid. The children found in the refrigerator schoko pudding from 23.6.2018 and they said it is still good and started to eat it. I can not imagine how it can be still good but it didnt smell bad so I allowed the children to eat it and now I have bad conscience.

[Martina23]

Today the lady in attorneys office told me I should think about twice if I would submit complaint by the trial with respect to Lyrica because the trial would be very expensive and it would take 20 years. I decided that if it wouldnt be possible I will leave the country. These are my final words and no. I am decided. There is for me no way back. As a protest against hurting human rights.

[Martina23]

Today something bad happened and I asked to change the country. It is for me bad time. I feel on the verge of change and I guess I must process it within me. Today I remembered the time when I was hospitalized, how they bound me when I did nothing. I guess I came up too much fighting in the last time, I hope I will calm down now when it is sure that I will move. I also need peace. I feel sad that this task was so huge and so less people prepared to help. I would like to come more near to people.

[Martina23]

So no luck as always. Everywhere only bureacracy. I am so tired. Trying everywhere and always unsuccessful. I think I really want only to leave this country. I dont know why anywhere I talk about our problem (harm from drugs) I just find deaf ears.

[powerback]

I get your issue martina,im on your side but I suggest doing up the logistics of moving country and uprouting your family .do the pros and cons and eventually settle on witch one you want ,

Its abhorent what happened to you in hospital and I think your time is better spent healing that situation inside your soul ,

I really do get your point but the system is way to murky to listen . 

Going up against the authorities like your are is pointless ( not your issue).

 

Sign petitions ,pass petitions that you find  helpful around to others .gather all the differnt sites and organizations you find that want to make a difference.

The fact peter grozche has been pushed out of the Cochrane callobration just shows how murky it is .

I mean no judgement of you .

In time it will come around to the psychiatric industrys turn like the catholic church ,there is people alive that will have to be prosecuted for how they treated other human beings under the illusion of treatment.that time is a long way off.in a world were donald trump is elected president just shows you how bad it is ,economics comes first and thats going in way before drugs were around.

Cherish your family and your time on this planet ,im really with you but I am not going up against authority anymore or in the future ,theres way to much stacked in there favour .

Take care.

 

[Martina23]

43 minutes ago, powerback said:

I get your issue martina,im on your side but I suggest doing up the logistics of moving country and uprouting your family .do the pros and cons and eventually settle on witch one you want ,

Its abhorent what happened to you in hospital and I think your time is better spent healing that situation inside your soul ,

I really do get your point but the system is way to murky to listen . 

Going up against the authorities like your are is pointless ( not your issue).

 

Sign petitions ,pass petitions that you find  helpful around to others .gather all the differnt sites and organizations you find that want to make a difference.

The fact peter grozche has been pushed out of the Cochrane callobration just shows how murky it is .

I mean no judgement of you .

In time it will come around to the psychiatric industrys turn like the catholic church ,there is people alive that will have to be prosecuted for how they treated other human beings under the illusion of treatment.that time is a long way off.in a world were donald trump is elected president just shows you how bad it is ,economics comes first and thats going in way before drugs were around.

Cherish your family and your time on this planet ,im really with you but I am not going up against authority anymore or in the future ,theres way to much stacked in there favour .

Take care.

 

Hi pb, 

 

You are right. It comes me slowly senseless, or at least here, I dont believe all countries are so undemocratic like here. I want to be believe that other countries are better functioning. I want to prepare things and finally leave the country by 2020 (I have rental contract here until 2020).

 

When I wrote to authorities that I want to leave the country because of lack of democracy in Austria (I described there how the people are pushed drugs here through fake studies and from pharma supported doctors), I put it in cc to one local newspaper. As always, no answer. I guess there are topics which the newspapers write about and which not. But how bad are foreigners this is the newspaper full.

 

I liked, one woman told me once that it is not right to expect from the courts justice. She meant the courts are here for judgement not for justice. It came sad but true.

 

Nevertheless, I felt so tired from this talking to the wall. I will go today sleep soon. 

 

How are you? How was holiday? You seem to me already much calmer. How is your med situation now? You take only venlafaxin, isnt it.  Are your relatives already more understanding?

 

I also think you shouldnt start drinking pb. I think life without drinking is much easier. It is more free. You can think, you can concentrate on things, you have strenght to make other people happy and to make something beautiful from your life. You can fly.

[Martina23]

By one attorney in Vienna it was told to me "that to put this Lyrica case to the court is senseless as it would take 20 years, cost a lot of money and noone knows who would win". It made me so frustrated on Saturday, that I wrote on Saturday to chancellor, the head of the opposite party and 4 newspapers. I wrote there the issue how the doctors are manipulating the clinical studies, spread these medicines like candy and I wrote there that I dont seem to find a way to get any justice and that the issue is so serious for me that if I dont give real and makeable possibility to get justice, I am leaving the country based on the lack of democracy and injury to human rights.

 

I guess my email will be ignored again.

[Martina23]

So sure. No answer. These austrian magazines ignore me totally. I dont understand it at all. In Slovakia I always had a feeling that everything is possible. In Austria something is ill by the state. I get totally ignored. And I think our story - harm by prescription meds, no justice, manipulated clinical studies and doctors who get paid from 10 pharma companies is very interesting and very uptodate. So why do I get ignored? I dont understand these people. I am happy I will leave.

 

I will ask if I can go to US and if not I will ask for a work in Belgium by EU.

[Martina23]

The american embassy already wrote me back. They meant first I should get for the children American passport and then I can ask for temporary stay as a family member of American citizens (children). I still have to ask if working permit would be possible. If not I will go most probably to Belgium or some other country. I mean for me it is not important if I will sell oranges on the street I did in my life already a lot of works and started from the beginning many times. I can make CPA - certified public accountant and it will go (at least I will start to be expert at US GAAP and IFRS). I would even clean the toilets if absolutely necessary. There is no work to be ashamed.

 

I spoke to the woman which has a little shop under our apartment (she is also a foreigner) and she said Austrians are like that, very cold, hating everyone and everything, indifferent. I really dont wonder that Hitler was Austrian. She said she had in her cafeteria more families like mother, grandpa and 16 years old son, they drink coffee and everyone has to pay for himself. The son asks the mother mom can you buy me croissant, and she says no, you can buy yourself. Wtf?  I have never seen here anyone protest against anything. Only bad, cold faces. In Slovakia one injustice and everyone is already on the street. Slavic countries are like that. Noisy, loving, protesting, you hear always what the people think. Here everyone is silent, living only for himself, indifferent, just to have always more and more money. I have it enough.

[Martina23]

I feel a bit ashamed for myself, when I see how efficient all these people in GB who fight that we have independent studies are. I try here and everybody is only indifferent. I am sure I am in the wrong country. I wished here were also so great people. I know it is not my fault that here is everyone so bad, but it makes me feel ashamed nevertheless. I will write them that they will check also Lyrica, I am sure the clinical studies there are manipulated. I so admire also Dr. Healy.

[powerback]

On ‎10‎/‎2‎/‎2018 at 8:32 AM, Martina23 said:

The american embassy already wrote me back. They meant first I should get for the children American passport and then I can ask for temporary stay as a family member of American citizens (children). I still have to ask if working permit would be possible. If not I will go most probably to Belgium or some other country. I mean for me it is not important if I will sell oranges on the street I did in my life already a lot of works and started from the beginning many times. I can make CPA - certified public accountant and it will go (at least I will start to be expert at US GAAP and IFRS). I would even clean the toilets if absolutely necessary. There is no work to be ashamed.

 

I spoke to the woman which has a little shop under our apartment (she is also a foreigner) and she said Austrians are like that, very cold, hating everyone and everything, indifferent. I really dont wonder that Hitler was Austrian. She said she had in her cafeteria more families like mother, grandpa and 16 years old son, they drink coffee and everyone has to pay for himself. The son asks the mother mom can you buy me croissant, and she says no, you can buy yourself. Wtf?  I have never seen here anyone protest against anything. Only bad, cold faces. In Slovakia one injustice and everyone is already on the street. Slavic countries are like that. Noisy, loving, protesting, you hear always what the people think. Here everyone is silent, living only for himself, indifferent, just to have always more and more money. I have it enough.

HI martina ,try block out all the negativity like a wall and see how you get on for a while ,I enjoy  history and hitler was quite the despot  ,him and stalin had a similar upbringing ,the human condition is torturous when your raised like they were ,obviously no excuse ,you have nature, nurture ,rejection and much more has to go wrong to end up like them 2 and many more  dictators  .the longer we ignore the human condition the worse it will get .

it will have to be compulsory to study history like maths is  to understand the inhumanity man can cause other humans  to ever find a solution .I don't believe there is a utopia in our world .

trump being president happened in our  society decades before now .human nature is on a self destructive  path a long time now ,save your sanity and cherish what you have but I totally respect your views .

Take care .

[Martina23]

I painted today hands and it is the same sh*t like before. The most difficult is always to paint hands, feet and head.

[Martina23]

For everyone my favourite song.

 

 

[Martina23]

Again  got refusal from Dr. Healy so I already gave it up. It pains me. But I come me already like boxing rubber, it doesnt surprise me anymore, I think I take it already like  " and one more, just give me more more" I dont really realize it anymore.

 

I realize now that living in Slovakia was not that bad. It was a poor country but there was justice and you could always get justice. I think I will either go to America or back to Slovakia. I realize now that democracy is much more important than money. It took me 40 years.

[Martina23]

Healy however said that the book about Lyrica is a great idea. He meant however that it would take a decade to make a good book. He said I should ask for clinical studies some US lawyer company which sued / will sue Pfizer that they can obtain it for me. And then he said I should ask some woman scientist to help me with analyzing the studies. He meant Lyrica is scandal. But he praised the idea a lot.

 

I found also that this Austrian scientist which I reported to police that he is manipulating clinical studies for pharma companies had also incident with Healy. Healy in the past blamed him for ghostwriting, there was a scandal in 2002 which almost brought disciplinary consequences for the Austrian scientist. So I know I am on the right track.

[Martina23]

So I got again abszess. So the local anesthetics can not be avoided anymore ... Too bad.

[Martina23]

I put today this lyrica thing my withdrawal to civil court. I informed them that if I dont get justice or if it would take too long so that I can not afford the justice I am leaving the country based on lack of democracy and injury of human rights.

 

So I will wait some little time and if it wouldnt be affordable,  I will stop it and leave the country. So I will have a feeling that I did something that I fought for justice but when it will not go that I am just a person with small means and it wasnt possible

 

I will today go painting.

 

I am quite sad these days as I am still thinking on the man I love but I guess he doesnt want to talk to me anymore. I guess I hurt him, I wish so much we could talk together again, from all my heart.  Therefore  I feel a bit sad so I will stay a bit off SA so I can be also within my thoughts. 

 

I really didnt want to hurt him, I just assumed the situation other as it was and on the end it was other and I falsely evaluated the situation. I wish I could explain it, I did a mistake, I love him and I was quite stupid.

 

[Hopefull]

On 10/10/2018 at 1:16 AM, Martina23 said:

I put today this lyrica thing my withdrawal to civil court. I informed them that if I dont get justice or if it would take too long so that I can not afford the justice I am leaving the country based on lack of democracy and injury of human rights.

 

So I will wait some little time and if it wouldnt be affordable,  I will stop it and leave the country. So I will have a feeling that I did something that I fought for justice but when it will not go that I am just a person with small means and it wasnt possible

 

I will today go painting.

 

I am quite sad these days as I am still thinking on the man I love but I guess he doesnt want to talk to me anymore. I guess I hurt him, I wish so much we could talk together again, from all my heart.  Therefore  I feel a bit sad so I will stay a bit off SA so I can be also within my thoughts. 

 

I really didnt want to hurt him, I just assumed the situation other as it was and on the end it was other and I falsely evaluated the situation. I wish I could explain it, I did a mistake, I love him and I was quite stupid.

 

 Hi Martina,

Are you still going to move to USA?

Good luck with everything. 

I hope that you find your peace one day.

Sometimes we don't get the justice that we deserve and must learn to accept it and move on. 

It is not fair,  but that is the way things are sometimes. 

The main thing is you have tried. 

Take care. 

[Martina23]

Hello, I wanted to update. Today I had  a bad moment. I got the letter from the criminal complaint where I am sure that the clinical studies of Pfizer with respect to Lyrica are manipulated. I saw all CSRs. First they dismissed it and didnt even request any raw data. They just asked Pfizer "if he is guilty" he said no and that was it. I appealed. They dismissed my appeal because of form not content. They just looked at failure in form and so Pfizer can now continue to poison everyone. Why are these people so stupid?

 

I feel today very down about that. I spoke to Dr. Healy some time ago when I requested raw data from FDA. He meant FDA, EMA dont have them (FDA said it would take three years) He said I have to find US law firm who sues Pfizer in civil process and they have special conditions, access to raw data. So I will have to do that. Healy didnt want to make me expert statement he said he had quite a lot of work. I will continue but these lot of inactive, unconcerned people in the state sector frustrates me.

 

I am today very down about that. I think I will have to fight only through US organizations, here the people  never do anything. I will get these raw data one day. I saw CSRs where Pfizer claims " there was no discontinuation event during the clinical trial" What?

 

But I had also one positive thing in my life: I sold my first painting ... So now I can call myself " professional" :-), not such one who didnt sell a thing 🙂 I am very happy about that.

 

My boss wanted to promote me but I guess if I dont sue I will rather work part time and rather paint that one day is from me Vincent van Gogh 🙂

 

That is all now. I still have sometimes intrusive thoughts, not a lot but sometimes they are unpleasant. I guess I will not heal more but I do not stop researching. One day I will be able to prove the fraud by Pfizer, or at least find the people who understand...

 

I hope everyone is well, many greetings to Altostrata and all my friends.

 

I paint now each day and started with three books :-), so I will write only  if I reach some progress in our case.

 

I would like to go away from Austria, this lack of democracy and this negativity and lazyness here is killing me.

 

Edited January 5, 2019 by ChessieCat
removed obscenity

[Martina23]

I was laughing so much. I look that Chessiecat edited my text, I was laughing "removed obscenity" lol

[ChessieCat]

19 minutes ago, Martina23 said:

"removed obscenity"

 

Sometimes the filter misses them.

[Martina23]

Tomorrow I have one meeting with an Austrian attorney. But I am already decided. It doesn´t have a sense to sue here because if these authorities dont work at all so there wouldn´t come anything good from it.

 

I will try to get these studies in US and either find something to place a criminal complaint in US or to write a book about it.

 

If this English review of Lyrica would find some normal percentage of dependence, maybe 50%, then I will turn to all media, because Pfizer has in the clinical trials that there wasn´t any discontinuation event found during clinical trials which can not be. But all their studies check the withdrawal symptoms only up to two weeks after discontinuation and by long term Lyrica use it takes longer until withdrawal starts, by me it took three weeks.

 

I spoke yesterday with my boss about that, my friends told me afterwards, I shouldn´t talk about these things with my boss, what is true, but her opinion was disappointing to me. She didn´t understand the issue at all.

 

She said I should let it, that if the Lyrica would be so harmful, it would be already banned, bla bla... She meant that it just was my personal chemistry which didnt fit together with the medicine and others are happy and feel good on it. She also told that I am a too litle person to change something.

 

I really disagree. I dont believe on "too little persons". I am not the only one with Lyrica problems. I think every little person to another little person, and we will change the history. I dont believe on this negativity. I will solve the problem. I have my whole life to try. And if not me, someone else will solve.

 

Dr. Healy disappointed me a lot. I had a feeling that he should be a natural ally by this. But for me - he didn´t help even a little bit. I was quite sad about that. I expected more of him. He is helping only Dr. Goetzsche and other influencable people. But I told myself even if I have tousand or million people who either don´t help me or even laugh me out, I stand firm. This what I am doing is the right thing and if the people dont help, so it is just another person who doesn´t make a difference but we will win it, so or so. It is not everyone who can recognize things, but the strong and integre persons do.

 

I hope everything is ok with you.

 

I still have rest problems with my head. But I guess, I can not change it. I hope these things will go away some day. It´s funny, but with each defeat from these authorities, I feel stronger. When I see how low and uninterested these people are, I am not feeling bad, and I am so happy that Altostrata was so courageous to start this website. I guess she heard also from all sides that "the withdrawal doesn´t exist".

 

 

[Martina23]

 I am sending for everyone a song Imagine. I am listening to it a lot these days. It helps me a lot if I am so defeated from these authorities. I love the song.

 

 

 

[Martina23]

When these studies say that Lyrica has no withdrawal, can I still believe to myself that I went through withdrawal? I am pretty sure it was Lyrica and not my illness. But it makes me so unsure how can it be that I am right and millions people wrong? Shouldnt it be normally opposite? But I know I am not wrong.

[ChessieCat]

Hi Martina,

 

I've done a search on the internet using Google and the search term:  Lyrica withdrawal

 

These are some withdrawal stories from the first 2 pages.  I think this enough for you to know that it was withdrawal.  I hope this helps.

 

http://www.bluelight.org/vb/threads/531159-Lyrica-Withdrawal

 

https://www.recovery.org/topics/lyrica/

 

https://addictiveaddiction.com/lyrica/side-effects/

 

https://www.peoplespharmacy.com/2015/08/31/stopping-lyrica-suddenly-can-trigger-withdrawal-symptoms/

 

http://www.drugsdb.com/rx/lyrica/lyrica-withdrawal/

 

https://migraine.com/topic/lyrica-withdrawal/

[Martina23]

12 minutes ago, ChessieCat said:

Hi Martina,

 

I've done a search on the internet using Google and the search term:  Lyrica withdrawal

 

These are some withdrawal stories from the first 2 pages.  I think this enough for you to know that it was withdrawal.  I hope this helps.

 

http://www.bluelight.org/vb/threads/531159-Lyrica-Withdrawal

 

https://www.recovery.org/topics/lyrica/

 

https://addictiveaddiction.com/lyrica/side-effects/

 

https://www.peoplespharmacy.com/2015/08/31/stopping-lyrica-suddenly-can-trigger-withdrawal-symptoms/

 

http://www.drugsdb.com/rx/lyrica/lyrica-withdrawal/

 

https://migraine.com/topic/lyrica-withdrawal/

Thank you Chessie. You are so nice. I was already a bit puzzled, because everyone here in Austria doctors and authorities treat me as if I would make up something. I hate these people. I decided I would move from here. 

 

I hope you are well yourself. I find it very nice that you try to help other people even if you have withdrawal problems yourself. Such people I admire. I wish that everyone would be like this.