Hope4Healing:Long term SSRI user quit a year ago and now I have a benzo dependency

[Hope4Healing]

Hello group.  It's been a week since I last posted on Feb. 16th so I wanted to give an update.  I did go ahead and start my Klonopin taper on Feb. 12th.  I'm going very very slow at .0015 mg / day.  That's around 1% of my total original dosage (1mg/day).  I'm currently at .924mg/day (in two doses, morning and night).  I don't know why I didn't mention that I had already started my taper on my Feb. 16th post.  Maybe it's because so many of you had suggested that I not start my taper until things had stabilized more.  Anyway, I was feeling fairly stable so I started my taper.  It's been 12 days now and I did start feeling some withdrawal symptoms--a little more anxiety in the morning, sometimes with a slight buzzing feeling in my head.  The buzzing usually stops once I get up.  I'm also feeling a little more jittery and prone to getting flustered easier.  Definitely more irritable.  It's not too bad and still manageable and I haven't experienced the level of anxiety I had just a few weeks ago.  At the slow rate I'm tapering, it will take me almost two years to finish. If things get worse I'll just go back into a holding pattern.

 

I did a dumb thing last Friday night.  I had a bottle of wine (750 ml) sitting in my kitchen since New Year's and I decided to have a glass.  One glass led to another and I ended up drinking the entire bottle plus a bottle of beer on top of that.  Saturday was terrible (hangover plus SSRI/benzo w/d = no fun)  but Sunday was a little better.  Sunday night I stayed up until 11:00pm and then woke up this morning at 3:00am.  So I just got 4 hours of sleep but that will have to do as it's 5:10am now and I'll be getting ready for work in a few minutes.  I'm hoping my insomnia was caused by my drinking episode and not my Klonopin taper.  I definitely won't be drinking again any time soon.  The last time I drank like that was May 5th of last year (Cinco de Mayo).  I've drank wine and beer since but usually just one or two drinks at the most.  

 

One thing that I have noticed since my withdrawal from SSRIs and especially since I started taking the Klonopin is that my ability to enjoy anything is gone.  I play guitar and used to get a lot of enjoyment out of playing but now, although I still like to play, the deep connection with music I used to feel is gone.  I don't know if this is part of SSRI w/d or benzo w/d or both.  I'm going on a cruise with my mom, stepdad, and sister on March 9th but I can't seem to get excited about it.  I'm definitely not looking forward to having to deal with a lot of people but maybe it will help me to get my mind off of my w/d problems.  I'm sure I'll have fun once the cruise starts.  Sorry for the long post but it's early in the morning and I don't have anything else to do.  It's 5:24am now so I need to start getting ready for work.  I hope everyone has a nice week.

 

Alto, if you have any suggestions on my taper,  whether I should stop and hold for a while longer or continue at the slow rate I'd greatly appreciate your input.  Thanks.

[Hope4Healing]

Correction.  I'm tapering at .0015 mg / day.  That's around 1% of my total original dosage (1mg) per WEEK, not day.

[ladybug]

Glad it's 1% a week and not a day! You scared me there for a second, lol. That sounds like a very sensible taper, and if the WD symptoms get to be too much you can always re-evaluate. It sounds good to me though.

 

I definitely think the insomnia is caused by the alcohol! It's notorious for negatively affecting your sleep, even for people that are not on meds. I've been experimenting with small amounts of alcohol lately to see if I can tolerate it. I had been abstaining for 4 years prior to that. Some people are able to get away with small amounts of alcohol during WD, and some can't even tolerate that. So I would be cautious for sure.

 

Your description of your inability to experience pleasure sounds like anhedonia, which is a fairly common WD symptom. You can maybe check out Aberdeen's thread, as this is one of her biggest symptoms too.

 

I hope you are having a good day!

[Hope4Healing]

Thanks for the info Ladybug.  I did go and read some of Aberdeen's thread and found a lot of interesting information.  When I read about how terrible some of the experiences people have had with withdrawal, including your experience, I realize how fortunate I am that I'm not having worse symptoms.  Like someone said, it could always be worse. 

 

Yesterday was a good day for me.  I got over my hangover issues and actually felt pretty good.  I went online to watch a virtual tour of the cruise ship I'll be on and I actually started getting excited about it.  I had some moments where I actually felt happy and it felt pretty good to feel normal for a little while.  It gives me hope that I can be back to normal again someday.  It also makes me think that perhaps I can help to facilitate my recovery by preoccupying my mind with good things and quit focusing on the negatives of my current reality (withdrawal, anxiety, insomnia, anhedonia, etc...)  Anyway, I'm starting to have a more positive attitude about this cruise.  Before I was just worrying about the logistics of how I was going to continue with my liquid dosage of Klonopin and the fear I might experience from being around a lot of strangers.  

 

Today I don't feel quite as good as I did yesterday but I'm doing OK.  At least I'm past the three day hangover and didn't have to hold on my taper.  The initial jitters of starting my taper seem to be over and if I continue to feel good I just may increase my tapering amount from .0015mg/day to .002mg.  I'll have to wait and see.  

[Rhiannon]

Only thing I would add is that we need intermittent total holds. Your brain is incredibly complex and there are a lot of readjusting and balancing processes going on that don't all work at precisely X percent per day.  At 1% a week I would say stop every three or four weeks and hold for a week and every few months stop and hold for two or three weeks. Plus any time withdrawal symptoms seem to be ramping up at all.

 

You wouldn't tell a bone that it had to heal at exactly X percent per day ,and your brain is several orders of magnitude more complex than a bone.

 

I have come, over much time and observation, to the conclusion that holds (frequent enough and long enough) are as important as the actual cutting, to the success of a taper.

[Hope4Healing]

Thanks for the info Rhiannon.  That makes a lot of sense.

[Hope4Healing]

I got back from my cruise last Sunday, March 15.  The cruise went ok.  It was my first cruise and I didn't know what to expect.  I know I didn't enjoy it as much as I would have liked to because I was preoccupied with my withdrawal but I did enjoy the sights and shows.  We were constantly doing something so I didn't get as much time to relax as I would have liked.  Since it was Spring Break there were lots of families with children on board.

 

I think I started to let it bother me that I was surrounded by all of these families and although I was with my own family: mother, stepfather and sister, I felt very alone since I have no wife, children or girlfriend of my own.  I guess I felt like an outsider.  

 

After the cruise I noticed I was extremely tired for the first couple of days.  That fatigue turned into a deep depression by Wednesday and so I'm holding on my benzo taper until I feel better.  Perhaps I need to see a counselor to work through these issues.  

 

Today is Saturday and I'm still feeling down.  I know that it's probably part of the prolonged withdrawal from Prozac. I'm keeping myself busy today doing things around the house.  Saturdays are not usually very good for me anyway since I don't have a set schedule.  I seemed to be doing pretty good before the cruise but now I feel like I'm in a bad place again.  At least I'm not dealing with severe anxiety, but depression can be just as bad because it saps me of my energy and just leaves me feeling crushed.  Has anyone else had similar experiences after going on vacation while going through withdrawal?  Maybe I should get out and do some walking.

[mammaP]

I'm glad that you enjoyed parts of the cruise, try to hang on to those memories and look back on them when you feel low. I always find it hard after being away, it is distracting being on holiday surrounded by people and things to do, even when we don't want to be around people it does take out minds off the withdrawal for a little while. When I get home I am suddenly thrown back into the state I was in and it feels like the holiday never happened! 

Walking sounds good, it is very therapeutic and if at all possible a walk every day is good, even a few minutes round the block in the fresh air.  

 

When you settle back into the normal routines you will feel better, I always do, just remember the good times and they will help  get you through.

[Hope4Healing]

Well, my depression has resolved into anxiety.  I'm feeling like I did when I first switched to a liquid solution and started tapering too fast.  The cruise seems to have triggered it.  I guess I was feeling a lot of neuro emotions during the cruise that I let get to me.  I suppose what I'm feeling now is a wave.  Has anyone ever experienced a wave that was brought on by something external like an experience or something else that you reacted to negatively?  Or do waves just come and go without any noticeable cause?  It's all very confusing to me.  

 

Perhaps I should have held off on starting my taper.  I tapered for 3 and a half weeks prior to the cruise and tapered down 3.5%.  Maybe my CNS wasn't stable enough as some had suggested.  I can't believe how incredibly fragile my CNS is right now.  It's like walking a tightrope and the wind is trying to blow me off.  I know I shouldn't whine because I know that there are people here who have it a worse than I do.  If you're one of those people please forgive me for whining.  I guess I'm just looking for a little sympathy.  I just hope I get to feeling better soon.  Tomorrow is another day and with it the hope that things will be better.  

[Hope4Healing]

Thanks mammaP for your post.  

[Hope4Healing]

I've been feeling bad since I got back from my cruise last Sunday, March 15th.  I've been trying to figure out what happened to cause my bad turn.  I think that alcohol may have a contributing factor.  I did drink while on the cruise.  I didn't drink to the point of terrible hangovers the next day but I did drink some on four or five of the days of the cruise.  I figured that as long as I didn't drink to excess I would be ok.  I've been able to drink small amounts of alcohol in the past without any bad effects but this time I think it did me in.  I keep reading on the forums that alcohol must be avoided entirely while tapering and in withdrawal from SSRIs and benzos.  I thought I could get away with a little bit of alcohol from time to time as some people are able to do this.  I think now that I'm not one of those people.  I just hope this wave passes soon and I start to feel stable again.  

[Fresh]

I hope it passes quickly too Hope.

 

Sending love and blessings ,

[Hope4Healing]

Thanks Fresh.  I hope you're doing well.

 

Love and Blessing back at you!

[Hope4Healing]

Hi group.  

 

It's been three weeks since I got back from my cruise and I'm still struggling with the depression/anxiety I described in my previous posts.  I seem to alternate from depression to anxiety; back and forth. I think they are two faces of the same condition.  I've never gone this long with these heightened symptoms.  Is it going to end?  I'm still new to this whole protracted SSRI withdrawal/benzo addiction and so I don't know what to expect.  I could really use some experienced advice.  

 

I am still able to get around 6 hours of sleep but I am tired when I wake up so the sleep isn't very restful.  I think also that my Klonopin dosage in the morning is contributing to my fatigue and sleepiness.  Currently I'm holding at .45mg in the morning and the same dosage in the evening.  I've been holding for the past three weeks since my sxs flared up.  I think I'm going to stay at my current dosage for as long as it takes to get over this wave, if that's what it is. 

 

My anxiety comes and goes.  It seems that one moment I'll be having a crisis, on the verge of a panic attack and then it subsides.  Maybe it's neuro emotions that trigger it?  It's always my thoughts that bring on the anxiety.  Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

[Fresh]

I used to think of those times alternating between panic and having it subside as waves and windows.   Like you said , the

waves always pass.   For me it also seemed to be thoughts that triggered it , rather than anything external.

[Hope4Healing]

HI Fresh.  For me also it is thoughts that usually trigger it although sometimes the anxiety will just come on its own.  I feel like I've been getting worse so I've decided to updose on my Klonopin dosage back to the level I last felt stable.  I was at .90mg daily but I've bumped back up to .94mg daily.  That's a 4% increase which I'm hoping helps me to stabilize again.  It's very difficult for me to concentrate at work when dealing with this anxiety and depression.  

 

I think I started my taper too soon and it caught up with me.  I'm still in the middle of my SSRI withdrawal and I don't know how long it's going to take for that to pass.  It's been almost 15 months since I stopped taking Prozac and who knows how much longer I'm going to have to deal with that.  I've decided to take the advice of Petunia, Djones1984, ladybug and others who suggested I wait a while (maybe a long while) before I try tapering again.  I wish I had listened to them the first time.

 

Take care.

[Hope4Healing]

Hello group.

It's been six weeks now that I've been feeling bad daily, since I got back from my cruise. My main symptoms have been a heavy feeling of unease in my chest. It almost feels like I'm sick. This feeling can quickly turn into anxiety if a worrisome thought pops into my head. It's also a type of depression because it robs me of my strength and wears me out. Sometimes I'll get a headache from it. I haven't had a good day in six weeks. Sometimes when I drift off to sleep during the day from the fatigue I'll immediately wake up with a trembling sensation which is also anxiety. It subsides after a few minutes but never completely.

 

I thought I had escaped the really bad sxs from SSRI withdrawal that many people talk about but it now appears that I am having to deal with it on some level. Just how bad it will get I have no way of knowing. I feel like I'm hanging on by a thread. I can no longer tolerate loud music. My days off have become very unpleasant because I don't have a regular schedule. I wish I could sleep the whole day away but when I try to nap I wake up in a panic.

 

I am 15 months out from my much too fast taper from Prozac.

 

If this is a wave I'm in how long will it last? I'm not sleeping as well as I had been--five hours usually; some nights much less than that.

 

It's that constant feeling of unease in my chest that really gets me. I feel my most comfortable in the late evenings and worst in the morning. My morning anxiety will start as early as 3:30am on some days.

 

Alto, do you have any advice for me? My Klonopin has stopped working and now I'm just holding at the same dosage; .90 my / day.

Also, which type of doctor should I turn to for help? My pdoc isn't very knowledgable about SSRI withdrawal.

 

I'd appreciate any help from anyone who's been in this position. I'm living from moment to moment now.

[Hope4Healing]

Another thing I've been experiencing is cold chills and hot flashes. Most of the time I'm cold. Sometimes I'll wake up at night sweating and unable to fall back asleep until the sweating stops.

[Fresh]

That definitely sounds like protracted withdrawal to me Hope.    The klonipin may have been keeping a lid on it , but can't do that

any longer.

The "hots and colds" , as i called them , sounds like a new symptom.  It's called "temperature disregulation" and resides eventually

with all the other symptoms.   

The best you can do is become familiar with a range of management techniques for the most annoying symptoms.  keep stimulation

to a minimum and allow yourself to rest when you can.   Remind yourself that this is all withdrawal , it is temporary , and it will pass.

 

I'm doing CES therapy and would recommend it to anyone to try -   I've had NO withdrawal symptoms since my last decrease.

 

I'm so sorry things have gone in this direction for you.

 

xxx

[Hope4Healing]

Thanks Fresh.  I am in an online training class all week and doing my best to stay focused.  I have a constant ever present feeling of anxiety.  Yesterday I had a near panic episode that shook me up for the rest of the day.  I only got one hour of sleep last night.  By the time 4:00am comes around my sleep is effectively over because I get the morning cortisol surge that makes me shaky and anxious.  I hope that this passes soon.  I am praying for strength and that is really the only thing that is helping me to make it from hour to hour.  I'll be glad when this week is over.  Maybe then I can relax a little bit and calm down.

[Hope4Healing]

Hello group.  It's been over four months since I last posted.  I had been trying to taper off of klonopin but I was having a hard time stabilizing.  At that time I wasn't sure if my sxs were from SSRI withdrawal or from the benzo.  I now know that I was experiencing tolerance withdrawals from the benzo.  It was very hard on my body and even though I stopped my taper for a couple of months, I just couldn't seem to stabilize.  I got desperate and checked myself into a rehab clinic.  There they did a medically assisted c/t detox.  That was on May 12, 2015.  I was ok for around five days but then the horror started.  I now know what it feels like to be insane, out of your mind with anxiety.  They had to put me on seroquel for a few weeks to help me get over the worst of it.  I was in very bad shape for the first couple of months but I've been slowly recovering.  I'm still suffering from many of the physical and psychological sxs and I still have a long way to go.   

 

When I started my detox they put me on 1200mg of gabapentin daily to help with my withdrawals.  I don't know if it helped but I'm supposing it did.  I'm still taking the same dosage and notice that when I try to cut back on my dosage I do experience elevated levels of anxiety.  I will need to taper off of it at some point but right now I think I need to continue until I am more recovered.

 

Everyday is still a struggle and my symptoms seem to change from one week to the next.  I returned to work after five weeks because my insurance ran out and the detox facility decided I was in good enough shape to go back to work.  It was very difficult but I've managed with God's help.  Working helps me to keep my mind of my sxs and I noticed that on my days off I usually fall into deep depression because I don't have anything to do and I feel like my life is over.  My old life ended when I went into detox.  It was shattered to pieces and trying to rebuild it is very tough.  I don't drink anymore and all my old friendships revolved around alcohol and hanging out in the bars.  I'm not married so I don't have anyone to lean on.  I do have family and they are being very supportive of me.  I'm also seeing a therapist and that is also helping.  

 

Recovery is tough but I don't have to tell any of you that.  Everyone here is going through their own trials and I encourage each of you to continue on.  There has to be better days ahead.  I can't give up hope.  God bless you all.

[Petunia]

Update: I was never able to stabilize while holding.  I think I started experiencing tolerance withdrawals.  My symptoms just kept getting worse and I was't able to work so I checked myself into a rehab clinic and went through a medical detox.  It was a horrific experience and I'm still suffering from the side effects of detox.  I was put on gabapentin while in detox to help with anxiety but in the past few weeks I believe it is has started causing me problems.  I say that because recently I have started experiencing new symptoms that are the worst I've experienced since coming out of detox.  I have started tapering off it it and I'm feeling a little better already.  Anyway, I wouldn't recommend c/t off of any benzo if it can be helped.  In my case, I felt it was my only option.  I couldn't work no other means of support.  My insurance covered my stay in hospital and I was able to keep my job.  I went to work five weeks after detox.  It's been extremely rough and still continues to be rough but I'm on my way to recovery.  I struggle with deep depression, anxiety and cog fog every day but sometimes I have to take it one moment at a time.  I still feel worse now than at any point before detox but I am getting better.  Dave.

 

 

Hi Hope4Healing,

I read your update in the benzo forum, I'm replying here because now you're dealing mainly with gabapentin.

 

What are your new symptoms and why do you think they are being caused by the gabapentin?  I'm concerned you may not be ready for another taper yet because you are still recovering from your CT (detox) off Konopin just 4 months ago.

 

You wrote that you have been feeling better since you began tapering the gabapentin, how have you been tapering? What dose are you on now?

 

Please would you update your signature.

 

See:  Tips for tapering off Neurontin (gabapentin)

[Hope4Healing]

Hello Petunia.  Thanks for responding back to my thread.  

The symptoms I've been experiencing lately are dizziness, severe headaches in my sinuses, burning in my sinuses, increased burning in my arms, increased cog fog, and increased anxiety due to all of these new symptoms.  I believe they are due to the gabapentin because they are new; I haven't experienced most of them until recently.  Also, these symptoms "feel" different.  It's hard to explain but when these new symptoms began appearing they felt like they were different, especially the dizziness which I hadn't experienced prior.  It was more than just dizziness; it was accompanied to sensations the were similar to the brain zaps I used to experience back when I was on celexa and had missed a few doses.  

My doctor has also decided that it's time for me taper off the gabapentin.  When I called in a refill a couple of days ago she denied it and made me come in to discuss a tapering schedule.  She's says I've been on it too long already and need to get off it.  I know it's only been 4.5 months since my klonopin detox but I'm not in a position to do much since she's the one writing the prescription.  I really do think it is causing my new symptoms and the sooner I get off it the better I'll be.

Her idea for tapering is not a slow taper.  Each cut is 50% of the previous dosage.  I've done the first cut, from 1200mg to 600mg daily which was last Wednesday- five days ago.  My anxiety increased some but is calming down now.  The next cut will be when I'm ready, this week or next week.  I'm also taking propanolol and hydroxyzine as needed to help.  I know that I will make it through this leg of my recovery. It's just a blip on the radar compared to the klonopin detox I've been through.  God bless everyone here.  

[Hope4Healing]

Hello Petunia.

You were right about not being ready to do another taper, especially a really fast taper like I described in my last message.  I did the 50% cut and let's just say I'm back at my original dosage.  I was hoping my CNS would have been able to handle the cut but right now I just need to keep everything the same while I continue to recover.  My doctor has also prescribed hydroxyzine and propranolol to help with anxiety.  I really don't want to take the propranalol because I hear that it can also cause withdrawal symptoms.  I think it may also make me light headed.  Right now I'm taking a small dosage (20mg) in the morning only.  My doctor wants me to take it three times a day but I really don't think it's helping me any.  The hydroxyzine seems to help a little but I don't take it very much anymore because it may also contribute to my dizziness.  Luckily, my dizziness on happens occassionally now.  If you've got any other advice for me I'd love to hear it.  Thanks and God bless you.

[Hope4Healing]

I'm now over nine months post c/t detox off of Klonopin.  I'm still dealing with lots of w/d symptoms, mainly anxiety and depression.  Lots of ugly, uncomfortable feelings that are hard to describe.  They remind me of the bad feelings you get when you're sick with a bad flu.  I feel like my nerves are sick.  Anyway, most days are like this but every few weeks I'll get a day where I don't feel quite so bad.  I'm waiting for my first real window.  

[Hope4Healing]

It's been one year since my c/t detox off of Klonopin and over two years since tapering off of Prozac.  I was doing better but because of a severely stressful situation in my personal life my anxiety has gone through the roof.  These benzo withdrawals don't seem to want to end.  I couldn't even tell you if I'm still going through Prozac withdrawals.  They were never near as bad as the withdrawals and side effects I experienced once I became addicted to the benzo.  My pdoc wants me to go back on an SSRI (lexapro) in order to help with the anxiety.  I don't know that it would help and I would hate to end up in an even worse situation.  I haven't had a window in a couple of months.  I seem to be in a constant state of elevated anxiety.  I wish there was something I could do to help with these symptoms.  Anyone have any ideas?

[Hope4Healing]

Hello folks.  I haven't been on this board in over 1.5 years.  It's been around 33 months since my c/t detox off of klonopin.  I'm still having some problems.  I have been on gabapentin since rehab and I think some of my issues may be caused by it.  I've thought this all along and wanted to get off this stuff and even tried to early on but I just haven't felt well enough to do it until recently.  I did taper one of my doses (afternoon dose) around 5 months ago and am now starting to taper another one of my doses (evening dose.)  Up until this past weekend I was taking 300 mg in the morning and 600 mg at night.  I cut 100 mg from my night time dose on Saturday night and felt w/d sfx on Sunday morning when I woke up.  I'm surprised the w/d sfx started up so quickly and I'm afraid it is an indication that my taper will be slow and painful.  I guess three years is a long time to be on gabapentin and my brain has become quite dependent on it.  I'm so tired of dealing with w/d.  It's been three years now and I still don't see any end in sight.  Anyway, that's where I'm at.  The next cut I do will be less than 100 mg.  I'll probably try 50 mg and see how I feel.  Any thoughts are welcome.

 

Dave

[ChessieCat]

Hi hope4healing and welcome back.  However, I'm sorry that you needed to return.

 

From tips-for-tapering-off-neurontin-gabapentin

 

On 09/07/2012 at 1:39 PM, Altostrata said:

Reduce by 10% per month to start
The 10% rule holds for gabapentin, just like other psychiatric drugs: Reduce by 10% per month, calculated on the last dosage. (The amount of the reduction gets progressively smaller.)

 

Edited February 28, 2018 by ChessieCat

[Hope4Healing]

Thanks ChessieCat.  Today is the fourth day since my cut and I'm feeling a little better.  I can think a little more clearly and my w/d symptoms aren't as bad.  Hopefully I'm past the worst of it.  It's a little strange because the last time when I tapered my afternoon dose I didn't start feeling bad until around day 4 or 5.  Back then my symptoms improved after around 6 or 7 days so either way I know that it will be over soon enough.  I will wait a good two weeks or more before attempting another cut just to be sure.  The (short) week long w/d after a gabapentin cut is such a change from when I was going through klonopin withdrawals.  They lasted for months without any let up.  And like I mentioned before, I'm thinking that a lot of what I thought was still benzo w/d may be actually due to the gabapentin.  I've been in "protracted withdrawal" (over 18 months according to BenzoBuddies.org) and was pretty depressed about it.  The thought of going year after year with no improvements is enough to make anyone lose heart.  I'm praying that once I taper completely off of gabapentin things will get markedly better for me.  I never have had a very good idea of what was causing my symptoms anyway because it all started with a fast taper off of Prozac so I could have been experiencing symptoms from three different meds: Prozac, klonopin and gabapentin.  What a train wreck!

 

 

[Hope4Healing]

I am a returning user who has come here to access the Lyrica Survivors (Pregabalin and Gabapentin Support) community

 

Hello group.  I have come here as a member of the old Facebook group Lyrica Survivors (Pregabalin and Gabapentin Support).  I first joined this community back in early 2015 because I was experiencing withdrawals after having tapered off of an SSRI.  My physician prescribed Klonopin to help with the anxiety from withdrawals and I then quickly developed a Klonopin dependency and was unable to taper due to bad withdrawal effects.  Feeling desperate, I entered a detox facility in May 2015 and was cold turkeyed off of Klonopin and put on 1200mg of Gabapentin to help with the Klonopin withdrawals.  I stayed on the Gabapentin for a couple of years at the same dosage while I slowly recovered and then in 2017 I started a very slow taper of the Gabapentin.  I am doing a liquid taper and am now down to 177mg per day--three doses of 59mg each.  I was taking only two doses per day until I got down below 200mg per day.  At that point I started feeling very unstable and have been experiencing extreme depression and constant anxiety along with other physical symptoms.  So, a little over a month ago I switched to three doses per day but am still feeling unstable with the same severe depression and anxiety and physical symptoms.  At this point I don't really know what to do.  I tried getting admitted to another detox facility but they would not take me because they said I was at too low of a dose and should just be able to cold turkey with no danger of having seizures.  I contacted the original detox facility that detoxed me off Klonopin and put me on Gabapentin and they told me that they don't consider Gabapentin a "substance abuse medication" and the only way they would admit me would be if I did a private pay (out of my own pocket).  The program would be for 30 days and would cost me $24K.  Ouch!  That's my story.  I have a few old posts in this group that date back prior to the start of my Gabapentin taper.  Thank you for taking the time to read my post.

 

Edited March 17, 2022 by ChessieCat
added Intro topic title before merging with intro topic

[Frogie]

@Hope4Healing

 

Welcome to SA. We are a volunteer run site for members tapering off or have tapered off antipsychotic medications such as yourself.

 

This is your introduction page where you will receive information, ask questions and meet members from the previous FaceBook page and others.

 

Thank you for creating a signature. 

 

I'm going to give you a link to get you started and @MerryJayneFriday should be along to welcome you. In the meantime, if you have any questions please don't hesitate to reach out.

 

 

Edited March 18, 2022 by Frogie

[ChessieCat]

Two Intro topics merged.

[canaanstongue01]

On 1/16/2015 at 6:45 PM, Hope4Healing said:

It's like when I was on the SSRIs, I was insulated from the full effect of reality and so nothing really seemed to faze me.  I acted recklessly and did a lot of dumb stuff while on SSRIs and drinking alcohol.  It's like while I was on the SSRIs I was looking at life through rose colored glasses and when I quit the SSRIs the glasses came off.  My symptoms slowly got worse.  It was like hitting a brick wall in slow motion.  The depression didn't get a whole lot worse but my anxiety kept increasing.  I started taking Klonopin to help with the anxiety.

 i relate to this so much, and just want you to know that it was comforting to find someone else with a similar experience (though i was taking benzos along with the pot and booze). it really did feel like hitting a brick wall in slow motion.

[MerryJayneFriday]

Hello and welcome @Hope4Healing

 

I'm also formerly of the Facebook Lyrica Survivors group. Glad you found your way here and I'm glad I caught up with you!  I'm still learning the site so please be patient.  

After reading your story it sure sounds like you have been thru it!!  Terrible that a detox place put you on the gaba to help with another drug. I'm so sorry. But look how far you've come!!!  Woo hooooo!!  

My taper was over a 4 year time period and I remember so well being sick over and over again. Sometimes I held a lot longer than 4 weeks just because I couldn't bear to be sick again. It's a tough road but you can do it!  I feel so much better now that im approaching 2 years off Lyrica!  Lots of remedies in the files as you know,  but don't be afraid to hold for a while to get well if you need to.  

 

You are indeed a Warrior!  Holler when you need help. Know you are in my prayers XO

 

MJF

[OldDodgy]

@Hope4Healing

 

Hiya. Well I think you are doing a great job to reduce so sensibly !  At last you are at a safer level.  With support from SA and us pentinoid survivors do you think you can cope going nice slow. ? 
 

Might be worth editing your signature so folk know instantly approx your tapering dose. .? 
 

Wishing you well 

 

OldDodgy aka Dxxxie 

Edited March 18, 2022 by OldDodgy
Missed a bit sorry

[Hope4Healing]

Thanks to all of the people who have replied to my Intro topic, especially the moderators - ChessyCat and MaryJaneFriday.

 

I was on this forum once before for a good while in 2015 but I can't for the life of me remember how to navigate it.  It hurts my head trying to figure it out.  I am suffering from extreme cog fog due to the Gabapentin.  My side effects have gotten a lot worse since getting below 200 mg per day.  I can't seem to stabilize enough to continue my taper.  I have seriously considered doing a cold turkey but everyone is warning against it.  I cold turkeyed Klonopin and that was a nightmare and I really don't want to go through that again.

 

I know I need to edit my signature to bring it up to date so first I will copy the old signature here so that I have a record of it.

My old Signature:

On 20 mg Prozac daily and Celexa 20 mg daily for 17 years.  

November 2013 - Tapered off 10mg Prozac using water titration method over a three month period.  Last dosage was mid January, 2014.

Began taking Klonopin .5mg for anxiety on an as needed basis--once every few days when needed.

April 2014 - Woke up with severe anxiety and flank pain (IBS?)  Began slowly increasing frequency of Klonopin usage.

Sept 2014 - Started a new job.  Stress level greatly increased. Increased Klonopin dosage to .5mg at night; some times during the day as well.

Dec 2014 - Started noticing bad sx when I went a few days without taking Klonopin--trembling in stomach, increased anxiety, muscle twitches.  At this point I realized I had developed a Klonopin dependency.  I increased dosage to .5mg twice daily.  Stabilized (sort of.)

Late Dec 2015 - Starting taper from Klonopin dry cuts.  First cut was 6.125%.  Some w/s but only for a few days (day 8 & 9)

Jan 1 2015 - starting very slow liquid titration taper from Klonopin.  Still at same 1 mg daily (minus 6.125% cut).  Waiting to stabilize before continuing with taper.

May 12, 2015 - after several months of trying to taper and only experiencing worse symptoms I got desperate and checked into detox clinic.  c/t detox.  Brutal nightmare.  Trying to recover.  Progress is very slow.

Current medications - gabapentin 1200mg / day.  hydroxyzine and propranalol on an as needed basis for anxiety.