Sarasmiles' Lexapro Withdrawal

[LexAnger]

Here is the link, https://www.facebook.com/BloominWellness?fref=nf

[Sarasmiles]

Hey Everyone,

Thanks SO much for the support and feedback. It really helps, and means a lot to me!  I looked at the Baylissa FB page.  Very positive and encouraging! I loved it.

 

I'm good today; day 27 off of Lexapro, and day 10 on 8mg. of Prozac.  I guess I would say I feel stable, although also a little weird at times.   I feel more easily moved, and I like that.  Yesterday my niece was accepted, with a huge scholarship, at the very competitive college where my dad taught for 35 years, before he developed Alzheimer's.  I was kind of surprised by how totally, utterly thrilled I felt for her.  I think that on heavier doses of drugs I don't experience that depth of joy for another person. Then last night, my mom read me a letter over the phone, that had been written on my niece's behalf, by the president of this college.  He wrote mostly about my father's contributions to the school, as a teacher and administrator, and about what a wonderful, loving, caring, gifted man he was.  His point was, "take a look at this applicant...she's his granddaughter".  Hearing those beautiful words written about my (now deceased) father just filled me with enormous pride and love and also sadness at his loss.  These feelings felt so deep and real, and I know that I did not feel things this way when I was more heavily medicated.

 

So, even though I am still taking 8 mg. of Prozac, I am feeling the benefits of coming off of it, and I am elated about that.  

 

I am anxious to reduce it further, especially because I am not having any real withdrawal symptoms now (well, that's not entirely true...I wake up with headaches, and do have moments of slight dizziness.)  I agree with what you said, Prestorb, that I should take my therapist's and my psychiatrist's disagreement with my  going off of meds as a caution to go slowly and carefully.  I will stay where I am now for a while, but it's hard for me to resist testing the waters by cutting back further.  Patience, Sara. Patience.

[Altostrata]

Good to hear taking a stable 8mg Prozac is working for you, Sara.

 

The nervous system stress you experienced by coming off Lexapro and then not stabilizing on Prozac initially may indeed be contributing to increased irritability and weepiness. These are common withdrawal symptoms.

 

Although you are feeling pretty well, if I were you, I'd stay at 8mg Prozac for another month at least to let your nervous system settle down.

[Sarasmiles]

Thank you, Altostrata.  I will take the option of further cuts off the table for now.  My perspective on this has changed since I came here, and staying well is now my priority over getting off the drug altogether right away.  I can wait a month, and then make another small reduction. I've put it in my calendar for April 24, and will try not to think about making a reduction before then. 

[Sarasmiles]

Day 30 off of Lexapro, Day 13 on 8 mg. of Prozac.  I am doing okay, in terms of physical withdrawal symptoms. I feel slight dizziness, let's say a few times a day. Nothing awful.  I wouldn't call it brain zaps, just a kind of light-headed feeling.

 

My emotions are definitely more raw.  I am irritable at times, particularly late in the day.  This is the time of day when I used to self-medicate with wine, while cooking dinner, helping with homework, dealing with kids' busy schedules, bickering, needs...On Lexapro I was able to give up wine with only a bit of struggle back in November.  Now, the urge to have a drink comes back a bit more frequently.  I have no intention of acting on it, but it does pop up when I'm feeling overwhelmed with other peoples' demands and my own brain full of to do lists, concerns, and annoyances.  Wine is a tempting escape.  But I know in my heart that it will not help, and will only make things worse and more complicated.  I am healing my brain with good foods, exercise, yoga, sunshine, fresh air, meditation and time without alcohol and on less SSRI.  

[Sarasmiles]

Feeling down today.  It's only 7:45am, but my mood is a little low.  I'm coming down with a cold, and have a sore throat, so maybe that's all it is. My energy feels low, and although it's my day off, I'm not really looking forward to the day ahead.  There are so many things I could or should do, and I don't feel like doing any of them. Think I'll start with a yoga class, which I do want to do, and hope that lifts my mood somewhat.

[Prestorb]

Hi Sara, I have a cold too and it is not helping my mood or motivation one bit. But it's also important to rest more than normal to get over it. Mine started a couple of days ago. Kudos to you for having enough energy to go to yoga! Try not to overdo it and make it worse though. Hope you recover quickly, seems to be going around....smiles, Rachel

[Sarasmiles]

Thanks, Rachel! I hope you recover from your cold quickly, too! I only went to yoga because it's a gentle class...I wouldn't have done one of my hot yoga classes!  It was good.  Home in bed now, where I can get work done on the laptop while resting...except that I get distracted by things like wanting to visit this site! 

[Dane22]

Hey Sara! Came right here to check on you! Glad I did, sounds like your having a sub par day due to a bug. Ugh. Hard to feel positive when your body is under attack. Glad you made it to yoga, a little serenity infusion never hurts.

 

You've come such a long way, so very, very happy for you.

 

I'm sending you a pry bar so you can force open a window. Lol.

 

Sending you good vibes and you're in my thoughts.

[Sarasmiles]

Thanks Dane!!  Today was a pretty good day, in spite of having a cold.  My husband and I had a good couples therapy session, and things are starting to shift a little with us. I had my own therapy too.  It's tiring to have both in the same day, so I've changed the schedule for the future.  

 

I'm itching to make another cut in the Prozac, because I'm doing okay. I keep reminding myself that this time I want to be able to stay off of it, so I need to be patient!

[Dane22]

Sara, for what it's worth, I'll share this and hope it helps. If I would have tapered down, I truly feel that it would have been easier. I stopped and reinstated too many times and, as a result of these peaks and troughs of blood serum levels of Prozac, had the most horrible 6 months of my life. A few times I actually asked to be taken to he psychiatric hospital because I really thought I was losing it.

 

The only reason I'm doing well now is because I had such a scant amount of Prozac in me it made it easier. Also, the horrific withdrawals from cold turkey and the adverse reactions to starting it back up over and over and over again, made me realize nothing this time could possibly be worse.

 

Basically, follow your gut. You have the gift of intuition and you know your mind and your body. If in doubt, STOP! Don't do anything. Think about all the options then proceed with the plan you are most comfy with.

 

I need and want you to succeed! One day at a time. We ARE going to make it!

[Sarasmiles]

I got really, really upset and angry with my husband tonight. I don't know if this is "neuro-emotions" or real emotions, less softened by meds.  I won't bore anyone with the details, but basically he left the room while I was talking to him. We had made a fire in the fireplace so we could sit down together and talk, and there was an issue I gently disagreed with him about.  He just got up and left.  I assumed he'd be right back, but when he didn't return in 10 minutes, I went to see what was up. He was watching TV with the kids. I was floored.

 

Here's the thing. I don't know if it's "normal" to feel the way I did. My head was sort of dizzy with anger. I felt flushed. I felt as if I'd had a lot of caffeine...just agitated and angry.  I didn't express this in the moment, because the kids were in the room. I said, "I thought you were coming back. We were in the middle of a conversation, and you just left", but I didn't overtly express anger or hurt, at least not to the degree I was feeling it. I went upstairs and took a bath. After the kids were in bed, I told him my feelings were hurt. I explained why. He didn't say much, except "I thought we were done talking" and "I'm sorry I hurt your feelings".  So okay...maybe I 'shouldn't' be so upset. Maybe this is a withdrawal kind of upset.  It makes me crazy, not knowing what's real and what isn't.  

 

I did make a 10 percent cut two days ago.  But also, this little incident happened in a bigger context...the context of often not feeling that he listens to me, or that we can talk intimately. The context of his often shutting down and shutting me out. The context of being hyper attuned to abandonment.  So I honestly don't know whether I reacted this strongly because I have taken 10 percent less prozac for two days, or just because he and I have these issues. Argh. 

[Altostrata]

Feeling like you'd want to bash his head in seems like a perfectly normal reaction to me. His passive-aggressive show of disrespect is a segue to a fight, with you being the identified aggressor.

[Sarasmiles]

Thanks for that, Altostrata!

[Altostrata]

If you feel he doesn't listen to you, I'd say that's a real issue in your relationship. You need to explore this.

 

You may find he's like a cat, simply a short attention span for involvement, and doesn't mean anything personal by it.

[Dane22]

Hey there Sara! Sorry, been busy on the farm and haven't posted. Although I do sign on daily and "stalk" other peoples posts

 

Spouses. Ugh. when you figure it out, let me know. One thing I know is that there are three versions to every story 1. Your take 2. His take 3. the truth.

If you are anything like me, I assume the worst and inject the most awful feelings into situations that upset me. Most times (90%), I'm wrong to varying degrees.

 

I hope you are well. Thinking of you and checking to see how life is. May you always have numerous good days to every "so-so" day.

[Sarasmiles]

Thanks for checking on me, Dane!  I'm good today, and have been feeling up for a few days now.  In fact, yesterday I actually said out loud to my kids, "I'm amazing. You know that?" and I cheerfully listed all the many things I'd accomplished or tended to during the day!  

 

I am comfortable with the cuts I've made, but am going to try and hang in there at my low dose a bit longer.

 

One of the things that feels different for me this time around, is that I am tolerating negative feelings better. I think in the past, in withdrawal, I have really freaked out over bad moods, bad days, or tearfulness...always looking for signs that this wasn't going to be okay.  This time, I seem to be noting my changing moods with more objectivity and serenity.  I accept that they will come and go. 

My marriage continues to be troubling, but we are making slow progress in therapy together.  I don't know if we can make it work or not, but I will do anything and everything I can to improve things.

[Dane22]

Sara, of course you're amazing!

 

Stopping by to check in. Have my tea in hand to chat for a bit.

 

Marriage. Ugh. Someone should create "Marriage for Dummies" book. I would be first in line to buy it. I, for certain, am in no position to give advice in that department. But, I can lend an ear and support you.

 

when you have a chance, post on your thread and let us know you're good. and if you're not good, let us know what kind of ice cream youre eating.

[Sarasmiles]

Thanks, Dane!  I'm feeling good today!  The stuff with my husband is not new by any means.  I think on meds I was able to suppress it, and my feelings were dulled enough that I could just go on, not really dealing with the issues between us.  Now things are more out in the open, and I'm glad. It's hard, but it's genuine.

I am down to about 2 mg. Prozac now, and having no withdrawal symptoms.  Very grateful.

[Dane22]

Yay Sara!

 

I am glad that the plan you've cultivated for yourself is working for you!

 

I believe in researching, active listening and gathering as much information from multiple sources is the key to making an informed decision. I do not believe that there is one solid plan for everyone. "one solid plan for everyone" is the theory that brought so many of us here to SA.

 

Its through trial and error that we have to formulate our own individual care plans. I believe that these personal care plans need to be altered to reflect the current struggles we are in.

 

You, Sara, have found a plan that's working. Not an easy road for you to arrive here.

 

happy for you. very happy. Please keep posting. We don't all fit into the same plan. Nice to read about the windows that other people experience.

[Dane22]

Sara. just checking in to see how you are. Been awhile. If you have a chance, touch base and let us know what's working for you and how you are.

[Sarasmiles]

Hi Dane! Thanks for checking in on me...and hello to anyone else who might be around!

I am doing well.  I am down to 1 mg. of Prozac now, and the taper has been pretty comfortable.  I feel as though my whole, true self is coming back.  One of the best things is that I've felt a re-emergence of affection for and attraction to my husband. Feelings that had been gone for a long time have re-surfaced.  It's wonderful.

 

I have down moments, for sure, but I think they fall within the realm of normal human emotion.  I don't feel the weight of depression in my chest. I don't feel like crying all the time. I do sometimes get crabby, or fed up, or just a little blue....but it passes.  I feel grateful that this "bridging" strategy eased the withdrawal from Lexapro, and that coming off of Prozac hasn't been nearly as hard as I'd feared, nor as hard as it's been in the past. I plan to take my last dose on Sunday.

[Altostrata]

Good to hear, Sara.

 

Have you been decreasing by 1mg at a time? I fear you've been going a little fast. You may wish to decrease by smaller amounts in this last push.

 

Please summarize how you switched to Prozac and your tapering strategy in your signature.

[Dane22]

Sara, that's the best news I've heard all week! So happy for you. Thank you for letting us know how you have been. Funny, the healthier I become the less I document on my thread. In kind of liking my new boring life! Lol.

 

I'll be checking back to see how the next decrease goes!

[Sarasmiles]

Today is my first day off of Prozac, since making the switch from Lexapro.  So far, I feel the same as I did yesterday and the day before and the for quite a while now. 

 

I saw my psychiatrist yesterday, and he continues to disagree with my decision to get off of medication.  He once again reminded me of the ways in which he thinks I do better on meds, and of how depressed I got last year when I went off of Lexapro the first time.  This time I did the Prozac bridge, and have tapered more slowly, and I've also made other changes which help.  Couples therapy has been very useful, as has staying alcohol free for the last 6 months.  I see my therapist weekly.  I take yoga classes 3-4 times a week, and walk in the woods with my dog nearly every day. I am eating well, getting rest when I need it, and not driving myself too hard to be "perfect".  I am just more self-accepting than I used to be.

 

It was unsettling to hear my psychiatrist's arguments against what I'm doing, but I've had a line from a  song going through my head that helps: Sara Bareilles, "Who died, and made you king of anything..." Maybe a little childish of me, but I need resolve!

[Prestorb]

Hi Sara, it's great that you have done so well with your taper! Congratulations!!

 

Maybe your psych is just really worried now that he is losing a client! Stay strong, it's not necessary that he agree with your decision. You know yourself and your feelings best.

 

Regardless, if you do start to experience worsening WD symptoms that you find intolerable, it doesn't mean your psych is right. It just means your taper may have been a little too fast. Please keep this in mind if protracted WD starts to kick in within a month or two, or even later. Lots of folks have to reinstate at very low doses and then taper very slowly. Hopefully this won't be the case at all with you, and you will have smooth sailing. I hope so! Keep us posted and take care. :-)

[freespirit]

Sara,

 

Great to hear how well you're doing with things.

 

In terms of your psych...I think a lot of people in these positions are a little too comfortable with the sense of power..and seem to have trouble when clients take charge of their own health. My MD has been equally unsupportive of me coming off meds.

 

I don't think there's anything childish about holding onto your sense of wisdom..whatever ways work to do that.

 

In the words of the poet Hafiz:

 

Run, my dear,
from anything that may not strengthen
your precious budding wings,

 

Run like hell, my dear,
from anyone likely to put a sharp knife
into the sacred, tender vision
of your beautiful heart.

[Sarasmiles]

Thanks Prestorb and Freespirit.  Freespirit, I love the quote!

 

Altostrata, I will change my signature to show my taper. I am sure that for many people it will seem fast, and perhaps I'll suffer for that as time goes on...so far, so good.  

[blackrabbit]

Thanks Prestorb and Freespirit.  Freespirit, I love the quote!

 

Altostrata, I will change my signature to show my taper. I am sure that for many people it will seem fast, and perhaps I'll suffer for that as time goes on...so far, so good.  

Any updates? I am going through the same taper process of Lexapro and bridging with Prozac (which I will start soon but I am very scared) and I want to know how you are doing. I've been reading this whole thread to prepare myself...

 

My cousin's husband is a psychiatrist and since I have not found one that works for me yet, I decided to ask him for some help. He is the one who told me about bridging in the first place, which is how I found this topic. Below is part of the email he sent to my cousin to send to me. The last link is the table he would like me to follow. (I tried copy and pasting it from the email but the format got all weird.) Thoughts, concerns, opinions, are appreciated:

 

Patients who have difficulty tapering off of SSRIs may benefit from being switched to an equivalent dose of fluoxetine (table 1); the fluoxetine can then be tapered off, typically without discontinuation effects.

In addition, patients who suffer a discontinuation syndrome after an SSRI has been stopped can be acutely treated by startingfluoxetine 10 to 20 mg per day. Once the withdrawal symptoms have abated and the patient has been stabilized on fluoxetine 10 mg per day for one to two weeks, the drug can be discontinued. For patients who have difficulty discontinuing fluoxetine 10 mg per day, a liquid formulation is available for administering a dose less than 10 mg per day. 

 

Also, I found this table with suggested dose reductions on a Harvard medicine site. It recommends tapering down from Lexapro by 5 mg at a time (20mg -> 15mg -> 10mg -> 5mg -> 0mg) allowing for 2-6 weeks for each dose reduction.

http://www.health.harvard.edu/diseases-and-conditions/how-to-taper-off-your-antidepressant

[kuppy4750]

Thanks Prestorb and Freespirit.  Freespirit, I love the quote!

 

Altostrata, I will change my signature to show my taper. I am sure that for many people it will seem fast, and perhaps I'll suffer for that as time goes on...so far, so good.  

Hi Sara! Just wanted to see how you were doing. I hope all is well. I am tapering from Lexapro and found your thread encouraging!

[btdt]

Hi Sara I ended up on your thread by searching the name "

Elizabeth Wurtzel"

 here at SA as there was an interesting quote about her on another site as they say here

" After Prozac Nation was published, Wurtzel "went home with a different man every night and did heroin every day"

 

I never heard of her till today but I thought it interesting as others have talked of sexual issues while drugged... to put it nicely.

 

She then talks about not wanting a commitment 

http://nymag.com/thecut/2013/01/elizabeth-wurtzel-on-self-help.html#

something Hellen Fisher would call a side effect... Fisher is here at SA in article form if your curious... 

 

now off the drug she is getting married...

but I don't know how long she has been off prozac... 

 

So I came here to talk to you about her book as you said you read it... and I see you have not been here for a long time... not one to be put of easily I decided to put the conversation out there and see if you were interested in a chat.  

 

I hope your well and I wish you peace

B