AliG Posted September 4, 2015 Share Posted September 4, 2015 Pre, you sound great. To what do you owe your recent success? Was it a positive attitude or just time? Either way, I'm happy for you. I think it was you that recommended Baylissa Fredericks? It was very helpful. Thank you. Wishing the best for you, Ali. Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014 Psych Drug - free since May 2014 . Link to comment
Prestorb Posted September 8, 2015 Author Share Posted September 8, 2015 Thank you all for your encouragement!! AliG - I believe that time just allowing my systems to to rest and heal has been the biggest factor in lifting the anhedonia and lethargy for me. It may have been me that recommended Baylissa, I really like her book and have tried to accept my condition as best I could. I still cannot tolerate supplements or even allergy meds, they generally make me very irritable or tired or both - and I used to take all kinds of stuff! I do take the vitamin C packs for my allergies, which are ramped up right now. I drink 1/3 caffeinated coffee, but of course, I put sweetener and cream in it - just can't give that up! And I have found CBT and a local weekly support group (although none of the members are going through AD) to be helpful for me. My Christian faith has also been a major source of hope and strength for me. But I am very fortunate in the sense that, although I do have a 12 year old son and do some part-time work outside of my home, I am mostly a stay-at-home mom and have a lot of control over my schedule. So I rest when I need to. Sleep has become a little bit of an issue recently because I am waking at 4 am most days and can't go back to sleep. If I don't squeeze in a nap, then I am a bear by 8 pm or so. Up until six weeks or so ago, I was sleeping 10+ hours a day and had been doing that for months and months. Maybe our systems bounce back and forth between the extremes before settling in the middle ground? At the same time, my energy levels have ramped way up - which actually feels more normal for me. But I have to find quiet, still times or again, I can become very tired and irritable. Regardless, I am very thankful to have moved past the malaise that was my existence for too long, and I pray that my experience will give others here hope and encouragement. Each one of us is different and progress at different rates, but we are wonderfully made and it is quite amazing how our bodies can recover from trauma and abuse. Hang in there fellow Withdrawal Warriors! And God bless you in your journey. :-) 2005-2009, Lexapro 10 - 20 mg, CT WD w/severe depression and anxiety: 2010-2015, Paxil, 30 - 40 mg, tapered off at 10 mg/week, moderate anxiety and depression: 2010-2015, Clonozapam 0.25 mg, as needed for anxiety and sleep: 1/10/2015, Zoloft 25 mg, tried to increase to 50 and 75, but nausea and dizziness: 2/13/2015, Paxil 5 mg, added back after 2 weeks at zero to reduce WD: 2/28/2015, Paxil 10 mg, increased from 5 mg to reduce WD, HOLDING: 3/04/2015, Zoloft discontinued (reduced to ~12.5 mg on 2/19, ~6.25 mg on 2/26, then zero): 4/26/2015, Paxil starting 10% taper (no scale so was inadvertently at 20% taper, yikes!): 4/30/2015, Paxil 10 mg, reinstated (WD disappeared between August 2015 and May 2016) 5/02/2016, Started 10% taper, reinstated to 10 mg on 5/11/16: 4/29/2017, Last dose of Paxil (working with holistic psychiatrist, lots of supplements to aid WD): Primary symptoms: apathy, demotivation, anhedonia, fatigue, stress intolerance, moderate social anxiety 7/1/2018 Finally feeling like myself again, success!!! Praise God! Even with the stress of relocating recently, I am feeling pretty good most of the time now. Granted, I eat healthy, I exercise, I don't drink caffeine or alcohol and I try hard find a healthy balance of quiet and social times. Hang in there and keep the faith, you can do it too! Link to comment
AliG Posted September 8, 2015 Share Posted September 8, 2015 Pre. If you've been sleeping until 4am, at least you are getting some sleep. I'm happy that you have some of your energy back, but I think we will always have to be careful not to overdo it. I think having some quiet time is important during withdrawal and it's good that you make that a priority. Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014 Psych Drug - free since May 2014 . Link to comment
Prestorb Posted September 25, 2015 Author Share Posted September 25, 2015 I just wanted to note that I have been taking a generic antihistamine (10 mg Loratadine, Target brand) for a couple of weeks now and seem to be tolerating it just fine. My allergies were absolutely kicking my butt and this med seems to keep the symptoms at bay. Yay! 2005-2009, Lexapro 10 - 20 mg, CT WD w/severe depression and anxiety: 2010-2015, Paxil, 30 - 40 mg, tapered off at 10 mg/week, moderate anxiety and depression: 2010-2015, Clonozapam 0.25 mg, as needed for anxiety and sleep: 1/10/2015, Zoloft 25 mg, tried to increase to 50 and 75, but nausea and dizziness: 2/13/2015, Paxil 5 mg, added back after 2 weeks at zero to reduce WD: 2/28/2015, Paxil 10 mg, increased from 5 mg to reduce WD, HOLDING: 3/04/2015, Zoloft discontinued (reduced to ~12.5 mg on 2/19, ~6.25 mg on 2/26, then zero): 4/26/2015, Paxil starting 10% taper (no scale so was inadvertently at 20% taper, yikes!): 4/30/2015, Paxil 10 mg, reinstated (WD disappeared between August 2015 and May 2016) 5/02/2016, Started 10% taper, reinstated to 10 mg on 5/11/16: 4/29/2017, Last dose of Paxil (working with holistic psychiatrist, lots of supplements to aid WD): Primary symptoms: apathy, demotivation, anhedonia, fatigue, stress intolerance, moderate social anxiety 7/1/2018 Finally feeling like myself again, success!!! Praise God! Even with the stress of relocating recently, I am feeling pretty good most of the time now. Granted, I eat healthy, I exercise, I don't drink caffeine or alcohol and I try hard find a healthy balance of quiet and social times. Hang in there and keep the faith, you can do it too! Link to comment
quitpaxil2015 Posted October 5, 2015 Share Posted October 5, 2015 Hi Prestorb, Just want to drop by your topics and tell you how much I appreciated that you posted on my thread. I am glad you found an allergy medication that helps you. Allergies are so annoying! I hope you continue to do well as you seem to have been doing these past couple months. Thank you for the encouragement. Username: quitpaxil2015 - Started antidepressants sometime in 1990. Misdiagnosed with Bipolar, but later with thyroid disease in1998 (8 years of being on several different psychiatric meds with several psychiatric hospitalizations). Total thyroidectomy in 1999. At the time, was on 85 mg of Paxil. In 2001, tried to get off Paxil and had car crash due to vertigo and w/d symptoms. Given more psychiatric meds including Prozac and Trazodone to treat SEVERE w/d from Paxil - which is the only reason I still take Paxil. Tried to taper off Paxil again in 2004 - from 25 mg to 20 mg (5 mg cuts) - had to go back on 25 mg on the 10th day of the taper due to inability to function (dizziness, vertigo, motion sickness, crying spells, depersonalization, etc). Currently on Paxil 25 mg and Trazodone 100 mg. Trying to quit Paxil in 2015. April 22, 2015 - Paxil 22.5 mg. May 13, 2015 Paxil 20 mg. June 3, 2015 - Paxil 17.5 mg. June 24, 2015 - Paxil 15 mg. Don't remember - 12.5 mg. August 5, 2015 - Paxil 10 mg. September 16, 2015 - 7.5 mg (considering going back up - severe anxiety/panic) September 28, 2015 - back up to 10 mg. October 6, 2015 - back up to 15 mg. Link to comment
Prestorb Posted October 7, 2015 Author Share Posted October 7, 2015 Thank you for stopping by QP! I hope you found my thread helpful and that it gave you hope, withdrawal is such a difficult thing to go through and we each experience it so differently. But my experience is that on the other side of it, you have this appreciation and zest and love for life that I don't know that you can have without experiencing "walking through the fires of hell" first. So hang in there even when you feel there is no hope because it IS temporary and eventually, it WILL pass! 2005-2009, Lexapro 10 - 20 mg, CT WD w/severe depression and anxiety: 2010-2015, Paxil, 30 - 40 mg, tapered off at 10 mg/week, moderate anxiety and depression: 2010-2015, Clonozapam 0.25 mg, as needed for anxiety and sleep: 1/10/2015, Zoloft 25 mg, tried to increase to 50 and 75, but nausea and dizziness: 2/13/2015, Paxil 5 mg, added back after 2 weeks at zero to reduce WD: 2/28/2015, Paxil 10 mg, increased from 5 mg to reduce WD, HOLDING: 3/04/2015, Zoloft discontinued (reduced to ~12.5 mg on 2/19, ~6.25 mg on 2/26, then zero): 4/26/2015, Paxil starting 10% taper (no scale so was inadvertently at 20% taper, yikes!): 4/30/2015, Paxil 10 mg, reinstated (WD disappeared between August 2015 and May 2016) 5/02/2016, Started 10% taper, reinstated to 10 mg on 5/11/16: 4/29/2017, Last dose of Paxil (working with holistic psychiatrist, lots of supplements to aid WD): Primary symptoms: apathy, demotivation, anhedonia, fatigue, stress intolerance, moderate social anxiety 7/1/2018 Finally feeling like myself again, success!!! Praise God! Even with the stress of relocating recently, I am feeling pretty good most of the time now. Granted, I eat healthy, I exercise, I don't drink caffeine or alcohol and I try hard find a healthy balance of quiet and social times. Hang in there and keep the faith, you can do it too! Link to comment
quitpaxil2015 Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 Thank you. I will post an update on my thread but I had to go on medical leave today. Applying for short term disability and FMLA. Could not stand the symptoms. Very severe WD Username: quitpaxil2015 - Started antidepressants sometime in 1990. Misdiagnosed with Bipolar, but later with thyroid disease in1998 (8 years of being on several different psychiatric meds with several psychiatric hospitalizations). Total thyroidectomy in 1999. At the time, was on 85 mg of Paxil. In 2001, tried to get off Paxil and had car crash due to vertigo and w/d symptoms. Given more psychiatric meds including Prozac and Trazodone to treat SEVERE w/d from Paxil - which is the only reason I still take Paxil. Tried to taper off Paxil again in 2004 - from 25 mg to 20 mg (5 mg cuts) - had to go back on 25 mg on the 10th day of the taper due to inability to function (dizziness, vertigo, motion sickness, crying spells, depersonalization, etc). Currently on Paxil 25 mg and Trazodone 100 mg. Trying to quit Paxil in 2015. April 22, 2015 - Paxil 22.5 mg. May 13, 2015 Paxil 20 mg. June 3, 2015 - Paxil 17.5 mg. June 24, 2015 - Paxil 15 mg. Don't remember - 12.5 mg. August 5, 2015 - Paxil 10 mg. September 16, 2015 - 7.5 mg (considering going back up - severe anxiety/panic) September 28, 2015 - back up to 10 mg. October 6, 2015 - back up to 15 mg. Link to comment
tgirl Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 Pre, Just wanted to stop by your thread and say hello! I have to say that I'm inspired. Good luck to you, Tgirl April 2014 remeron 45mg. June 2014 abilify 2.5 remeron wasn't working so abilify was then added September 2014 woke up with anxiety x 100!!!! Pdoc then took me from 45 to 7.5 within a month and took abilify from 2.5 to 0 Currently Remeron 7.5 Vitamin d 5,000 iu taking for about 3 years October 2014 added fish oil/omega 3 1000 mg per day Levothyroxitine 100 10 years or so Dec 2014 started tapering 10% every 10 days-no problems. August 2015 down to 0.1 mg Woke up with severe anxiety-sleep issues-racing thoughts-depression. 9/9/15 up dose 1 mg. Link to comment
AliG Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 Prestorb. Thanks for your thoughts and encouragement on my thread. I'm happy that you're finding your new normal after all this time. Very inspiring. A lot of our symptoms are quite similar. Are you still on 10 mg? Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014 Psych Drug - free since May 2014 . Link to comment
Prestorb Posted October 12, 2015 Author Share Posted October 12, 2015 Thank you QP, Tgirl and AliG for stopping by my thread! So glad to see you all here! Makes me feel special... AliG - I am still at 10 mg. I tried a few times to reduce (before I was even feeling better) and never lasted more than a day or two. I finally just decided to wait until January because Fall has historically been a difficult time for me emotionally, and it is hectic with all the holidays here in the U.S.. Halloween at the end of October leads into Thanksgiving at the end of November, and then Christmas. It's just boom, boom, boom and the year is over! So after some thought, I felt that I could increase my odds for success by waiting until life settles down a little in January (the dead of winter!). And this is a relatively new way of doing things for me, I have mostly in the past just jumped right in with complete disregard for the possibility that things might not go so well... But I am still feeling pretty darn good (cross my fingers!). I was a little more tired last week though, so I did try to rest more, exercise a little less, etc.. I think I was fighting a cold or maybe it's just seasonal allergies. But I do have to reign in my tendency to want to get involved and volunteer for everything! Because I become over burdened and stressed out and tired and grumpy! And I do it to myself! So it goes back to self care and being kind to myself, and it's something I have to work at and keep trying to stay balanced. I am pretty sure that is how I got here to begin with... Funny story (though not so much when it happened), this past Saturday morning I was walking up to the coffee shop to get a bagel at about 10 am. I had been up since 5 am with only coffee thus far (very typical for me, I'm an early bird). Well, the curb was extra high and I didn't quite clear it so my foot hit and I did a complete chin plant onto the pavement, ouch! Fortunately, my reaction was quick enough that I got my hands in front of me and landed a lot on my hands, elbows and knees but do have a nice little bruise on my chin. Oh, and the coffee shop was full so several people asked if I was okay, how embarrassing! After the initial shock and jumping up like "no big deal", I'm standing in line feeling sorry for myself and want to cry. But I needed that damn bagel so i wasn't going anywhere! It hadn't really been the best morning up to the chin plant point and I was kind of irritable before it happened. I almost wondered if the universe (or God) was reminding me that things can always get worse! Anyway, just wanted to share - it's comical now, and I'm fine although a little sore. Hang in there my fellow Withdrawal Warriors! Any way you can, cling to the belief that what you are experiencing will eventually pass and you will live fully again. When we have hope in our hearts, we can survive anything. Easier said than done for sure, but so worth the effort. (((HUGS))) 2005-2009, Lexapro 10 - 20 mg, CT WD w/severe depression and anxiety: 2010-2015, Paxil, 30 - 40 mg, tapered off at 10 mg/week, moderate anxiety and depression: 2010-2015, Clonozapam 0.25 mg, as needed for anxiety and sleep: 1/10/2015, Zoloft 25 mg, tried to increase to 50 and 75, but nausea and dizziness: 2/13/2015, Paxil 5 mg, added back after 2 weeks at zero to reduce WD: 2/28/2015, Paxil 10 mg, increased from 5 mg to reduce WD, HOLDING: 3/04/2015, Zoloft discontinued (reduced to ~12.5 mg on 2/19, ~6.25 mg on 2/26, then zero): 4/26/2015, Paxil starting 10% taper (no scale so was inadvertently at 20% taper, yikes!): 4/30/2015, Paxil 10 mg, reinstated (WD disappeared between August 2015 and May 2016) 5/02/2016, Started 10% taper, reinstated to 10 mg on 5/11/16: 4/29/2017, Last dose of Paxil (working with holistic psychiatrist, lots of supplements to aid WD): Primary symptoms: apathy, demotivation, anhedonia, fatigue, stress intolerance, moderate social anxiety 7/1/2018 Finally feeling like myself again, success!!! Praise God! Even with the stress of relocating recently, I am feeling pretty good most of the time now. Granted, I eat healthy, I exercise, I don't drink caffeine or alcohol and I try hard find a healthy balance of quiet and social times. Hang in there and keep the faith, you can do it too! Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Fresh Posted November 2, 2015 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted November 2, 2015 Watch out for those curbs Pre . . . hope your chin has healed. 1987-1997 pertofran , prothiaden , Prozac 1997-2002 Zoloft 2002-2004 effexor 2004-2010 Lexapro 40mg 2010-2012Cymbalta 120mg Sept. 2012 -decreased 90mg in 6months. Care taken over by Dr Lucire in March 2013 , decreased last 30mg at 2mg per week over 3 months. July 21 , 2013- last dose of Cymbalta Protracted withdrawal syndrome kicked in badly Jan.2014 Unrelenting akathisia until May 2014. Voluntary hosp. admission. Cocktail of Seroquel, Ativan and mirtazapine and I was well enough to go home after 14 days. Stopped all hosp. meds in next few months. July 2014 felt v.depressed - couldn't stop crying. Started pristiq 50mg. Felt improvement within days and continued to improve, so stayed on 50mg for 8 months. Began taper 28 Feb. 2015. Pristiq 50mg down to 45mg. Had one month of w/d symptoms. Started CES therapy in March. No w/d symptoms down to 30mg. October 2015 , taking 25mg Pristiq. Capsules compounded with slow-release additive. March 2016 , 21mg Link to comment
Prestorb Posted November 3, 2015 Author Share Posted November 3, 2015 Thanks Fresh!! Chin healed, then I rammed my shoulder into the wall going around a corner (for crying out loud!) and man, did that hurt! For days, still can't go to sleep on that shoulder. How do you do that?? But not as sore today, thank goodness. I guess when we finally start feeling better, we have a tendency to try to move at warp speed to make up for all the time we were in molasses mode.... At least I didn't break anything! 2005-2009, Lexapro 10 - 20 mg, CT WD w/severe depression and anxiety: 2010-2015, Paxil, 30 - 40 mg, tapered off at 10 mg/week, moderate anxiety and depression: 2010-2015, Clonozapam 0.25 mg, as needed for anxiety and sleep: 1/10/2015, Zoloft 25 mg, tried to increase to 50 and 75, but nausea and dizziness: 2/13/2015, Paxil 5 mg, added back after 2 weeks at zero to reduce WD: 2/28/2015, Paxil 10 mg, increased from 5 mg to reduce WD, HOLDING: 3/04/2015, Zoloft discontinued (reduced to ~12.5 mg on 2/19, ~6.25 mg on 2/26, then zero): 4/26/2015, Paxil starting 10% taper (no scale so was inadvertently at 20% taper, yikes!): 4/30/2015, Paxil 10 mg, reinstated (WD disappeared between August 2015 and May 2016) 5/02/2016, Started 10% taper, reinstated to 10 mg on 5/11/16: 4/29/2017, Last dose of Paxil (working with holistic psychiatrist, lots of supplements to aid WD): Primary symptoms: apathy, demotivation, anhedonia, fatigue, stress intolerance, moderate social anxiety 7/1/2018 Finally feeling like myself again, success!!! Praise God! Even with the stress of relocating recently, I am feeling pretty good most of the time now. Granted, I eat healthy, I exercise, I don't drink caffeine or alcohol and I try hard find a healthy balance of quiet and social times. Hang in there and keep the faith, you can do it too! Link to comment
Prestorb Posted December 17, 2015 Author Share Posted December 17, 2015 Hello fellow Withdrawal Warriors! It has been some time since I posted.The holidays have pretty much been kicking my butt, mostly in a good way but it is all becoming a bit over stimulating at this point. Kinda ready for them to be over frankly. Otherwise, I am still doing well overall, especially given my crazy travel schedule here recently. I did have several nights recently (while away from home) where I just could not sleep, and I averaged about 4 hours a night for three nights. I usually get at least 6 or so. But I think it was because I was stressed about the 80th birthday party that my sister and I were hosting for my stepdad. The holidays are just inherently stressful, even for those of us in post withdrawal mode. We come face to face with much of the dysfunction within our families that contributed to the use and subsequent withdrawal of drugs to begin with, and it's challenging even for the emotionally strongest among us. It took me two solid days to recover from the lack of sleep over the weekend. Fortunately, my stepdad only turns 80 once and he doesn't get too many parties, since his birthday is smack dab in between Thanksgiving and Christmas!! My son is with his father for Christmas this year, so my now-husband and I are going skiing (alone!!) and I am SO looking forward to that. I have truly enjoyed seeing family and friends this holiday season (really for the first time in several years), but I am a little exhausted from it all and looking forward to a respite. For those of you in the throws of withdrawal, try not to beat yourself up over not really "feeling" the Christmas spirit or having any desire to socialize with friends and family. All of that is a normal symptom of withdrawal and it really will pass eventually. I know it seems like it will never, ever pass and you will be destined to be miserable for the rest of your life. But it's temporary, it really does go away and when it does, you feel better than you have in a long time. And not only that, but you truly appreciate how much energy and life you have because you have experienced the dark side of withdrawal. The expression, "Whatever doesn't kill you only makes you stronger." is really true in the case of withdrawal. Hang in there, be kind to yourself, find healthy distractions to keep you occupied while TIME works it's magic. TIME really is the great healer in withdrawal. Most importantly, NEVER EVER give up hope for improvement. Celebrate every tiny, little improvement. Recovery can be painfully slow, but it is happening so try to focus on that as much as you can and eventually, you will beat withdrawal! (((HUGS))) 2005-2009, Lexapro 10 - 20 mg, CT WD w/severe depression and anxiety: 2010-2015, Paxil, 30 - 40 mg, tapered off at 10 mg/week, moderate anxiety and depression: 2010-2015, Clonozapam 0.25 mg, as needed for anxiety and sleep: 1/10/2015, Zoloft 25 mg, tried to increase to 50 and 75, but nausea and dizziness: 2/13/2015, Paxil 5 mg, added back after 2 weeks at zero to reduce WD: 2/28/2015, Paxil 10 mg, increased from 5 mg to reduce WD, HOLDING: 3/04/2015, Zoloft discontinued (reduced to ~12.5 mg on 2/19, ~6.25 mg on 2/26, then zero): 4/26/2015, Paxil starting 10% taper (no scale so was inadvertently at 20% taper, yikes!): 4/30/2015, Paxil 10 mg, reinstated (WD disappeared between August 2015 and May 2016) 5/02/2016, Started 10% taper, reinstated to 10 mg on 5/11/16: 4/29/2017, Last dose of Paxil (working with holistic psychiatrist, lots of supplements to aid WD): Primary symptoms: apathy, demotivation, anhedonia, fatigue, stress intolerance, moderate social anxiety 7/1/2018 Finally feeling like myself again, success!!! Praise God! Even with the stress of relocating recently, I am feeling pretty good most of the time now. Granted, I eat healthy, I exercise, I don't drink caffeine or alcohol and I try hard find a healthy balance of quiet and social times. Hang in there and keep the faith, you can do it too! Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus ChessieCat Posted December 17, 2015 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted December 17, 2015 Hi Prestorb, What a lovely post. Thank you. It is so positive and uplifting. As for you, it sounds like you have managed well under the circumstances and are aware of the effect is has on you. I think that is half our battle. Knowing what is happening means less fear. Take care of yourself now so you can enjoy your holiday. When people go skiing do you say "break a leg" or "don't break a leg"? Whichever please be careful. I've noticed you've had a couple of incidents recently. Oh yes, and I'm assuming you are still on meds. Don't forget to take them with you. CC * NO LONGER ACTIVE on SA * MISSION ACCOMPLISHED: (6 year taper) 0mg Pristiq on 13th November 2021 ADs since ~1992: 25+ years - 1 unknown, Prozac (muscle weakness), Zoloft; citalopram (pooped out) CTed (very sick for 2.5 wks a few months after); Pristiq: 50mg 2012, 100mg beg 2013 (Serotonin Toxicity) Tapering from Oct 2015 - 13 Nov 2021 LAST DOSE 0.0025mg Post 0 updates start here My tapering program My Intro (goes to tapering graph) VIDEO: Antidepressant Withdrawal Syndrome and its Management Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Fresh Posted December 18, 2015 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted December 18, 2015 Nice to hear all is well Prestorb. I'm looking at your sig. . . . are you still taking paxil 10mg reinstated in April , or has that been changing? 1987-1997 pertofran , prothiaden , Prozac 1997-2002 Zoloft 2002-2004 effexor 2004-2010 Lexapro 40mg 2010-2012Cymbalta 120mg Sept. 2012 -decreased 90mg in 6months. Care taken over by Dr Lucire in March 2013 , decreased last 30mg at 2mg per week over 3 months. July 21 , 2013- last dose of Cymbalta Protracted withdrawal syndrome kicked in badly Jan.2014 Unrelenting akathisia until May 2014. Voluntary hosp. admission. Cocktail of Seroquel, Ativan and mirtazapine and I was well enough to go home after 14 days. Stopped all hosp. meds in next few months. July 2014 felt v.depressed - couldn't stop crying. Started pristiq 50mg. Felt improvement within days and continued to improve, so stayed on 50mg for 8 months. Began taper 28 Feb. 2015. Pristiq 50mg down to 45mg. Had one month of w/d symptoms. Started CES therapy in March. No w/d symptoms down to 30mg. October 2015 , taking 25mg Pristiq. Capsules compounded with slow-release additive. March 2016 , 21mg Link to comment
AliG Posted December 22, 2015 Share Posted December 22, 2015 Hi Pre, I'm so pleased that you're doing so well . Have the best " skiing holiday " ever. So happy for you. Thanks so much for your support. Ali. Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014 Psych Drug - free since May 2014 . Link to comment
Prestorb Posted December 28, 2015 Author Share Posted December 28, 2015 Hello CC, Fresh, and Ali! Thank you so much for stopping by my thread, it means a lot to me and I appreciate your words of encouragement. I am thankful to have made it through the holidays in one piece, physically and emotionally! Or at least holding my own. Fresh - I am still taking 10 mg though I plan to start tapering after the new year. I think I have decided to start with a 5% taper because I truly want to minimize the symptoms and TRY to maintain my functionality. Less is more as far as I am concerned, if I get very lucky and have zero symptoms THEN I will consider a bigger taper. I don't see that happening to be quite honest, but I am a converted realist with these terrible drugs and the tapering process. I've suffered too many times and too much already. Ali and CC - I very much enjoyed skiing here yesterday (even though it was 60F!) and did not hurt myself! I did have a couple of little falls, but I am a very careful skier, my whole goal is to NOT fall. At 47, the falls hurt! But I love skiing and my skills are slowly improving now that I live close enough to go annually. Thanks again and Happy New Year to you, I hope 2016 is better for all of us than 2015! God bless you! (((HUGS))) 2005-2009, Lexapro 10 - 20 mg, CT WD w/severe depression and anxiety: 2010-2015, Paxil, 30 - 40 mg, tapered off at 10 mg/week, moderate anxiety and depression: 2010-2015, Clonozapam 0.25 mg, as needed for anxiety and sleep: 1/10/2015, Zoloft 25 mg, tried to increase to 50 and 75, but nausea and dizziness: 2/13/2015, Paxil 5 mg, added back after 2 weeks at zero to reduce WD: 2/28/2015, Paxil 10 mg, increased from 5 mg to reduce WD, HOLDING: 3/04/2015, Zoloft discontinued (reduced to ~12.5 mg on 2/19, ~6.25 mg on 2/26, then zero): 4/26/2015, Paxil starting 10% taper (no scale so was inadvertently at 20% taper, yikes!): 4/30/2015, Paxil 10 mg, reinstated (WD disappeared between August 2015 and May 2016) 5/02/2016, Started 10% taper, reinstated to 10 mg on 5/11/16: 4/29/2017, Last dose of Paxil (working with holistic psychiatrist, lots of supplements to aid WD): Primary symptoms: apathy, demotivation, anhedonia, fatigue, stress intolerance, moderate social anxiety 7/1/2018 Finally feeling like myself again, success!!! Praise God! Even with the stress of relocating recently, I am feeling pretty good most of the time now. Granted, I eat healthy, I exercise, I don't drink caffeine or alcohol and I try hard find a healthy balance of quiet and social times. Hang in there and keep the faith, you can do it too! Link to comment
quitpaxil2015 Posted January 4, 2016 Share Posted January 4, 2016 Hi Prestorb, I admire your courage in continuing your taper this year and also your restraint in going at a pace that will no doubt minimize any WD symptoms! I will keep checking your posts to see how you are doing! Thank you for all of the encouragement you gave me when I needed it the most! Username: quitpaxil2015 - Started antidepressants sometime in 1990. Misdiagnosed with Bipolar, but later with thyroid disease in1998 (8 years of being on several different psychiatric meds with several psychiatric hospitalizations). Total thyroidectomy in 1999. At the time, was on 85 mg of Paxil. In 2001, tried to get off Paxil and had car crash due to vertigo and w/d symptoms. Given more psychiatric meds including Prozac and Trazodone to treat SEVERE w/d from Paxil - which is the only reason I still take Paxil. Tried to taper off Paxil again in 2004 - from 25 mg to 20 mg (5 mg cuts) - had to go back on 25 mg on the 10th day of the taper due to inability to function (dizziness, vertigo, motion sickness, crying spells, depersonalization, etc). Currently on Paxil 25 mg and Trazodone 100 mg. Trying to quit Paxil in 2015. April 22, 2015 - Paxil 22.5 mg. May 13, 2015 Paxil 20 mg. June 3, 2015 - Paxil 17.5 mg. June 24, 2015 - Paxil 15 mg. Don't remember - 12.5 mg. August 5, 2015 - Paxil 10 mg. September 16, 2015 - 7.5 mg (considering going back up - severe anxiety/panic) September 28, 2015 - back up to 10 mg. October 6, 2015 - back up to 15 mg. Link to comment
Prestorb Posted May 12, 2016 Author Share Posted May 12, 2016 It has been a long time since I posted, got busy living I guess after starting to feel "normal" again. And I think I forgot how much WD sucked until I finally felt up to attempting a 10% taper from 10 mg. By day 4 the same old WD symptoms hit me pretty hard, then a good day, then another bad day, then a good day, and then just straight WD. Ugh. So 10% is apparently too much for me. And I realized that the scale I was using isn't accurate enough so there was probably a lot of slop in my dosage. That doesn't help. So I reinstated at 10 mg and wait for my thought processes to return to normal before I make any other adjustments. But before that, I was doing well I thought. Funny how quickly things can change, I'm just trying to keep my head above water at the moment. This caught me by surprise, I didn't think I would respond quite so negatively to such a small dosage change. 2005-2009, Lexapro 10 - 20 mg, CT WD w/severe depression and anxiety: 2010-2015, Paxil, 30 - 40 mg, tapered off at 10 mg/week, moderate anxiety and depression: 2010-2015, Clonozapam 0.25 mg, as needed for anxiety and sleep: 1/10/2015, Zoloft 25 mg, tried to increase to 50 and 75, but nausea and dizziness: 2/13/2015, Paxil 5 mg, added back after 2 weeks at zero to reduce WD: 2/28/2015, Paxil 10 mg, increased from 5 mg to reduce WD, HOLDING: 3/04/2015, Zoloft discontinued (reduced to ~12.5 mg on 2/19, ~6.25 mg on 2/26, then zero): 4/26/2015, Paxil starting 10% taper (no scale so was inadvertently at 20% taper, yikes!): 4/30/2015, Paxil 10 mg, reinstated (WD disappeared between August 2015 and May 2016) 5/02/2016, Started 10% taper, reinstated to 10 mg on 5/11/16: 4/29/2017, Last dose of Paxil (working with holistic psychiatrist, lots of supplements to aid WD): Primary symptoms: apathy, demotivation, anhedonia, fatigue, stress intolerance, moderate social anxiety 7/1/2018 Finally feeling like myself again, success!!! Praise God! Even with the stress of relocating recently, I am feeling pretty good most of the time now. Granted, I eat healthy, I exercise, I don't drink caffeine or alcohol and I try hard find a healthy balance of quiet and social times. Hang in there and keep the faith, you can do it too! Link to comment
ravijaua Posted September 28, 2016 Share Posted September 28, 2016 I wouldn't consider a bigger taper than the brassmonkey slide, look it up. 2.5% per week X 4 weeks and then hold 2 weeks. Personally, if was too taper, I would do 2.5 % X 2 weeks, 2.5 X2 weeks, hold 2 weeks. So 5% every 6 weeks. If no symptoms, I would bless myself and continue. It's not a race. Update 8122017 Zoloft 2004. Effexor 2004-2006. Paxil 20 mg for 2006-2010. Ct 2010, bad effects back on, stable by 2011. Poopout June 2015. Zoloft with paxil for a while, stopped Zoloft. Sep 2016 paxil 16.2 mg alone(295 mg pill weight). Started tapering 11/14/2016. Took off 1 mg pill weight(total pill weight of 20 mg = 365 mg and 16 mg is 295 mg). Went down 1 mg per week of pill weight so down to 291 mg by end of November. Starting getting anxiety issues starting since 12/10/2016. Hoping that a faster taper will help. 12/14/2016 - 15.95 mg (291 mg pill weight) 12/16/2016 - 15.83 mg (289 mg pill weight) 12/23/2016 - 15.67 (286 mg pill weight) 8/12/2017 - 15.34 (280 mg pill weight) Link to comment
Prestorb Posted May 18, 2017 Author Share Posted May 18, 2017 I have ended up going a little different route than many folks here, but I wanted to post an update nonetheless. After reinstating to 10 mg after a 10% drop about a year ago, I saw no improvement at all. In fact, after a couple of months, I started experiencing insomnia, lots of morning anxiety and nausea which I had not experienced prior. I am almost 49 and decided to check into some hormone therapy to see if that might help, and it did seem to help. But not with the depression or brain fog or complete lack of energy and motivation. After a few more months, I started seeing a therapist who of course thought I needed different medication. So I went to a conventional psychiatrist and tried 2 or 3 different meds all for very short time periods, usually less than a week. The side effects were always worse than what I was already experiencing. In December, I found a holistic psychiatrist (which is very expensive) and I have been seeing her weekly ever since. I am taking more supplements than I can list and we have gradually reduced my Paxil dosage and hit zero 12 days ago (so yay, but I'm not really celebrating yet although I am not having any terrible symptoms). I have definitely felt more tired and unmotivated since then, sleep isn't great but it's not terrible. I guess it's variable but tolerable and I don't work although I have a 13 year old son, but I can rest during the day and I have been doing that a lot. Even with all this extra support and guidance, this is still the toughest thing emotionally and mentally that I have ever gone through and it feels as if it will never end. But I keep praying and I trying to care for myself as best I can, and reading about the experiences of others helps me to not feel quite so isolated in this journey. I will try to post more often as I move away from the zero point and note how my symptoms change. I fully expect to be on this path for a while. I will note that I think one supplement seems to have helped me with sleep and kept anxiety at bay and it is Standard Process Inositol Powder (5010) taken at night. It may also contribute to tiredness during the day, I don't know, but anxiety and insomnia are the worse of the two evils for me so I will just pass that on. I know lots of folks struggle with anxiety and insomnia. Best wishes and prayers for each of you. I am thankful for this site and for those that continue to share their stories. It's comforting to have company on this particularly long and trying journey. 2005-2009, Lexapro 10 - 20 mg, CT WD w/severe depression and anxiety: 2010-2015, Paxil, 30 - 40 mg, tapered off at 10 mg/week, moderate anxiety and depression: 2010-2015, Clonozapam 0.25 mg, as needed for anxiety and sleep: 1/10/2015, Zoloft 25 mg, tried to increase to 50 and 75, but nausea and dizziness: 2/13/2015, Paxil 5 mg, added back after 2 weeks at zero to reduce WD: 2/28/2015, Paxil 10 mg, increased from 5 mg to reduce WD, HOLDING: 3/04/2015, Zoloft discontinued (reduced to ~12.5 mg on 2/19, ~6.25 mg on 2/26, then zero): 4/26/2015, Paxil starting 10% taper (no scale so was inadvertently at 20% taper, yikes!): 4/30/2015, Paxil 10 mg, reinstated (WD disappeared between August 2015 and May 2016) 5/02/2016, Started 10% taper, reinstated to 10 mg on 5/11/16: 4/29/2017, Last dose of Paxil (working with holistic psychiatrist, lots of supplements to aid WD): Primary symptoms: apathy, demotivation, anhedonia, fatigue, stress intolerance, moderate social anxiety 7/1/2018 Finally feeling like myself again, success!!! Praise God! Even with the stress of relocating recently, I am feeling pretty good most of the time now. Granted, I eat healthy, I exercise, I don't drink caffeine or alcohol and I try hard find a healthy balance of quiet and social times. Hang in there and keep the faith, you can do it too! Link to comment
Prestorb Posted May 24, 2017 Author Share Posted May 24, 2017 I stopped taking the Inositol powder at night because it was making me way too tired during the day. So it takes longer to get to sleep, I don't sleep as long or as well and then feel pretty exhausted in the afternoon. I think my mood lifted slightly but drops again when I get really tired and have a headache. But I am hanging in there, praying a lot and trying to motivate myself to do more than I feel like doing. I am noticing extreme cold sensitivity (even though the temps have been in the high 60's here!) and seem to be getting a headache later in the day most days. And any kind of change or stress can cause a lot of anxiety. I hate it when people ask what "plans" I have for summer or for some holiday. I'm not exactly in the frame of mind to be making "plans" and can't bring myself to focus enough to do it, and then have to deal with the anxiety associated with executing said "plans". Of course, I don't share this with many folks so they don't know not to ask. I'm sure I'm not alone on this site in feeling this way, sigh. But I think that, along with everything else, is all par for the course and I am just trying to do what I can, rest when I need to, and try to be patient with the process. This is a humbling journey and is strengthening my faith and relationship with God, so it's really a blessing in disguise. 2005-2009, Lexapro 10 - 20 mg, CT WD w/severe depression and anxiety: 2010-2015, Paxil, 30 - 40 mg, tapered off at 10 mg/week, moderate anxiety and depression: 2010-2015, Clonozapam 0.25 mg, as needed for anxiety and sleep: 1/10/2015, Zoloft 25 mg, tried to increase to 50 and 75, but nausea and dizziness: 2/13/2015, Paxil 5 mg, added back after 2 weeks at zero to reduce WD: 2/28/2015, Paxil 10 mg, increased from 5 mg to reduce WD, HOLDING: 3/04/2015, Zoloft discontinued (reduced to ~12.5 mg on 2/19, ~6.25 mg on 2/26, then zero): 4/26/2015, Paxil starting 10% taper (no scale so was inadvertently at 20% taper, yikes!): 4/30/2015, Paxil 10 mg, reinstated (WD disappeared between August 2015 and May 2016) 5/02/2016, Started 10% taper, reinstated to 10 mg on 5/11/16: 4/29/2017, Last dose of Paxil (working with holistic psychiatrist, lots of supplements to aid WD): Primary symptoms: apathy, demotivation, anhedonia, fatigue, stress intolerance, moderate social anxiety 7/1/2018 Finally feeling like myself again, success!!! Praise God! Even with the stress of relocating recently, I am feeling pretty good most of the time now. Granted, I eat healthy, I exercise, I don't drink caffeine or alcohol and I try hard find a healthy balance of quiet and social times. Hang in there and keep the faith, you can do it too! Link to comment
Administrator Altostrata Posted May 25, 2017 Administrator Share Posted May 25, 2017 You might want to take glycine at night, it has a very subtle but beneficial effect on sleep. This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner. "It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein All postings © copyrighted. Link to comment
Prestorb Posted May 25, 2017 Author Share Posted May 25, 2017 Thanks Alto, I picked up some glycine today and am going to give it a try. Today, I tried hard to focus on being grateful to beat the self pity and self absorption that I too often find myself wallowing in. And I actually did feel better. I've always tended towards being more of a half glass empty person, as much as I really hate to admit it. So WD just naturally pushes me right over the edge to seeing the glass as completely empty! But if I make a conscious effort (and it's practically moment by moment), I CAN focus on one thing at a time that I am grateful for and on other things that are just beautiful or positive. It doesn't come naturally to me at all, but I actually have a great deal to be thankful for and focusing on WD doesn't make the process move along any more quickly. Reminds me of Phillipians 4:8, "Finally brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable - if there is any moral excellence and if there is any praise - dwell on these things." 2005-2009, Lexapro 10 - 20 mg, CT WD w/severe depression and anxiety: 2010-2015, Paxil, 30 - 40 mg, tapered off at 10 mg/week, moderate anxiety and depression: 2010-2015, Clonozapam 0.25 mg, as needed for anxiety and sleep: 1/10/2015, Zoloft 25 mg, tried to increase to 50 and 75, but nausea and dizziness: 2/13/2015, Paxil 5 mg, added back after 2 weeks at zero to reduce WD: 2/28/2015, Paxil 10 mg, increased from 5 mg to reduce WD, HOLDING: 3/04/2015, Zoloft discontinued (reduced to ~12.5 mg on 2/19, ~6.25 mg on 2/26, then zero): 4/26/2015, Paxil starting 10% taper (no scale so was inadvertently at 20% taper, yikes!): 4/30/2015, Paxil 10 mg, reinstated (WD disappeared between August 2015 and May 2016) 5/02/2016, Started 10% taper, reinstated to 10 mg on 5/11/16: 4/29/2017, Last dose of Paxil (working with holistic psychiatrist, lots of supplements to aid WD): Primary symptoms: apathy, demotivation, anhedonia, fatigue, stress intolerance, moderate social anxiety 7/1/2018 Finally feeling like myself again, success!!! Praise God! Even with the stress of relocating recently, I am feeling pretty good most of the time now. Granted, I eat healthy, I exercise, I don't drink caffeine or alcohol and I try hard find a healthy balance of quiet and social times. Hang in there and keep the faith, you can do it too! Link to comment
Prestorb Posted June 1, 2017 Author Share Posted June 1, 2017 It's been almost 4 weeks since my last dose of Paxil and I think I am doing okay. Not great but pretty decent all things considered. Emotional stability seems to be gradually improving and I am consistently getting 5-6 pretty solid hours of sleep. I need more than than that and usually feel tired at times during the day, but it's still not terrible. I did find out that I have a low ferritin level which is basically an iron deficiency but not anemia so I am taking ferrochel iron supplements to raise my ferritin level. Low ferritin contributes to fatigue so combined with WD, explains my fatigue - which is still not terrible, it's been worse. At least I feel well enough to slowly start working on areas of my life that have been very neglected over the last year - exercise, family and social relationships. Every day is a new day! Just trying to take it one day at a time... 2005-2009, Lexapro 10 - 20 mg, CT WD w/severe depression and anxiety: 2010-2015, Paxil, 30 - 40 mg, tapered off at 10 mg/week, moderate anxiety and depression: 2010-2015, Clonozapam 0.25 mg, as needed for anxiety and sleep: 1/10/2015, Zoloft 25 mg, tried to increase to 50 and 75, but nausea and dizziness: 2/13/2015, Paxil 5 mg, added back after 2 weeks at zero to reduce WD: 2/28/2015, Paxil 10 mg, increased from 5 mg to reduce WD, HOLDING: 3/04/2015, Zoloft discontinued (reduced to ~12.5 mg on 2/19, ~6.25 mg on 2/26, then zero): 4/26/2015, Paxil starting 10% taper (no scale so was inadvertently at 20% taper, yikes!): 4/30/2015, Paxil 10 mg, reinstated (WD disappeared between August 2015 and May 2016) 5/02/2016, Started 10% taper, reinstated to 10 mg on 5/11/16: 4/29/2017, Last dose of Paxil (working with holistic psychiatrist, lots of supplements to aid WD): Primary symptoms: apathy, demotivation, anhedonia, fatigue, stress intolerance, moderate social anxiety 7/1/2018 Finally feeling like myself again, success!!! Praise God! Even with the stress of relocating recently, I am feeling pretty good most of the time now. Granted, I eat healthy, I exercise, I don't drink caffeine or alcohol and I try hard find a healthy balance of quiet and social times. Hang in there and keep the faith, you can do it too! Link to comment
Prestorb Posted June 2, 2017 Author Share Posted June 2, 2017 Social anxiety is definitely an issue, as I was reminded today when I volunteered at my son's school. Fortunately, I am not agrophobic and I think I've probably alway had a little social anxiety in groups, especially if I really don't know anyone very well. But this response is greatly amplified so I know it's a WD symptom for me. It makes sense that if SSRIs blunt our emotions then when we come off of them, there is a rebound effect and our emotional responses are way out of whack for awhile as our bodies figure it all out. I am trying to push myself to be a little more social because I have really isolated over the last year, but today was just a reminder that I'm still healing and it's going to take time. 2005-2009, Lexapro 10 - 20 mg, CT WD w/severe depression and anxiety: 2010-2015, Paxil, 30 - 40 mg, tapered off at 10 mg/week, moderate anxiety and depression: 2010-2015, Clonozapam 0.25 mg, as needed for anxiety and sleep: 1/10/2015, Zoloft 25 mg, tried to increase to 50 and 75, but nausea and dizziness: 2/13/2015, Paxil 5 mg, added back after 2 weeks at zero to reduce WD: 2/28/2015, Paxil 10 mg, increased from 5 mg to reduce WD, HOLDING: 3/04/2015, Zoloft discontinued (reduced to ~12.5 mg on 2/19, ~6.25 mg on 2/26, then zero): 4/26/2015, Paxil starting 10% taper (no scale so was inadvertently at 20% taper, yikes!): 4/30/2015, Paxil 10 mg, reinstated (WD disappeared between August 2015 and May 2016) 5/02/2016, Started 10% taper, reinstated to 10 mg on 5/11/16: 4/29/2017, Last dose of Paxil (working with holistic psychiatrist, lots of supplements to aid WD): Primary symptoms: apathy, demotivation, anhedonia, fatigue, stress intolerance, moderate social anxiety 7/1/2018 Finally feeling like myself again, success!!! Praise God! Even with the stress of relocating recently, I am feeling pretty good most of the time now. Granted, I eat healthy, I exercise, I don't drink caffeine or alcohol and I try hard find a healthy balance of quiet and social times. Hang in there and keep the faith, you can do it too! Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus ChessieCat Posted June 3, 2017 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted June 3, 2017 Have you checked out Claire Weekes? Claire Weekes' Method of Recovering from a Sensitized Nervous System She was an Australian doctor who suffered from anxiety and learned and taught ways to cope. * NO LONGER ACTIVE on SA * MISSION ACCOMPLISHED: (6 year taper) 0mg Pristiq on 13th November 2021 ADs since ~1992: 25+ years - 1 unknown, Prozac (muscle weakness), Zoloft; citalopram (pooped out) CTed (very sick for 2.5 wks a few months after); Pristiq: 50mg 2012, 100mg beg 2013 (Serotonin Toxicity) Tapering from Oct 2015 - 13 Nov 2021 LAST DOSE 0.0025mg Post 0 updates start here My tapering program My Intro (goes to tapering graph) VIDEO: Antidepressant Withdrawal Syndrome and its Management Link to comment
Prestorb Posted June 3, 2017 Author Share Posted June 3, 2017 I have not but I will, thank you for the recommendation! 2005-2009, Lexapro 10 - 20 mg, CT WD w/severe depression and anxiety: 2010-2015, Paxil, 30 - 40 mg, tapered off at 10 mg/week, moderate anxiety and depression: 2010-2015, Clonozapam 0.25 mg, as needed for anxiety and sleep: 1/10/2015, Zoloft 25 mg, tried to increase to 50 and 75, but nausea and dizziness: 2/13/2015, Paxil 5 mg, added back after 2 weeks at zero to reduce WD: 2/28/2015, Paxil 10 mg, increased from 5 mg to reduce WD, HOLDING: 3/04/2015, Zoloft discontinued (reduced to ~12.5 mg on 2/19, ~6.25 mg on 2/26, then zero): 4/26/2015, Paxil starting 10% taper (no scale so was inadvertently at 20% taper, yikes!): 4/30/2015, Paxil 10 mg, reinstated (WD disappeared between August 2015 and May 2016) 5/02/2016, Started 10% taper, reinstated to 10 mg on 5/11/16: 4/29/2017, Last dose of Paxil (working with holistic psychiatrist, lots of supplements to aid WD): Primary symptoms: apathy, demotivation, anhedonia, fatigue, stress intolerance, moderate social anxiety 7/1/2018 Finally feeling like myself again, success!!! Praise God! Even with the stress of relocating recently, I am feeling pretty good most of the time now. Granted, I eat healthy, I exercise, I don't drink caffeine or alcohol and I try hard find a healthy balance of quiet and social times. Hang in there and keep the faith, you can do it too! Link to comment
Prestorb Posted June 7, 2017 Author Share Posted June 7, 2017 Oh my, the changes to the site are difficult to adjust to. Another reminder of the effect of withdrawal on our brains.......sigh. 2005-2009, Lexapro 10 - 20 mg, CT WD w/severe depression and anxiety: 2010-2015, Paxil, 30 - 40 mg, tapered off at 10 mg/week, moderate anxiety and depression: 2010-2015, Clonozapam 0.25 mg, as needed for anxiety and sleep: 1/10/2015, Zoloft 25 mg, tried to increase to 50 and 75, but nausea and dizziness: 2/13/2015, Paxil 5 mg, added back after 2 weeks at zero to reduce WD: 2/28/2015, Paxil 10 mg, increased from 5 mg to reduce WD, HOLDING: 3/04/2015, Zoloft discontinued (reduced to ~12.5 mg on 2/19, ~6.25 mg on 2/26, then zero): 4/26/2015, Paxil starting 10% taper (no scale so was inadvertently at 20% taper, yikes!): 4/30/2015, Paxil 10 mg, reinstated (WD disappeared between August 2015 and May 2016) 5/02/2016, Started 10% taper, reinstated to 10 mg on 5/11/16: 4/29/2017, Last dose of Paxil (working with holistic psychiatrist, lots of supplements to aid WD): Primary symptoms: apathy, demotivation, anhedonia, fatigue, stress intolerance, moderate social anxiety 7/1/2018 Finally feeling like myself again, success!!! Praise God! Even with the stress of relocating recently, I am feeling pretty good most of the time now. Granted, I eat healthy, I exercise, I don't drink caffeine or alcohol and I try hard find a healthy balance of quiet and social times. Hang in there and keep the faith, you can do it too! Link to comment
Administrator Altostrata Posted June 8, 2017 Administrator Share Posted June 8, 2017 Sorry for the confusion. I postponed the change as long as possible. Don't worry, you'll get used to the new layout very soon. It's supposed to be easier for people using tablets and mobile. This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner. "It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein All postings © copyrighted. Link to comment
Prestorb Posted June 22, 2017 Author Share Posted June 22, 2017 (edited) It's been a little while since I posted, coming up on 7 weeks Paxil free and I'm hanging in there. Some days are pretty good, other days not so much. Occasionally, I feel very depressed and sad but not that often. I have to be careful NOT to be too introspective and ruminate, I think that is what makes me depressed. Fortunately, I do not have a lot of stress in my life right now so anxiety levels are usually low - even though they really should be zero. My energy is low and sometimes I feel very weak, but am trying to get some mostly gentle exercise most days. I think what bugs me most is the difficulty motivating, focusing and following through and the energy required. And I am talking about basic things - laundry, grocery shopping, cooking. But otherwise, my symptoms are minimal compared to so many here and I am very thankful. A lot of my battle is in keeping from beating myself up in my head for all the ways that I just can't seem to keep up with chores around the house. Sleep is usually decent with a night or two a week that is not so good. I was having a very itchy rash on my torso and I believe it may have been a histamine response because I read up on histamines and then have tried to cut out high histamine foods and it seems to have abated. I did also use some hydrocortisone cream for a couple of days because I was so uncomfortable. Now I am just using a 25% solution of tea tree oil and water in case it's actually a fungal issue. So, not sure it it's fungal or a histamine response, but somewhere in here I remembered reading that many folk have issues with histamine when they come off of SSRIs because they are powerful antihistamines. I have definitely noticed more nasal congestion. Social interaction requires a lot of energy and there is some anxiety associated with it so this is somewhat problematic, but I figure if I'm not holing up in my house then I'm doing okay. I'm not a social butterfly by any stretch but I'm also not agoraphobic so I'm not really pushing myself too much in that area right now. Edited June 25, 2017 by scallywag insert paragraph breaks for readability 2005-2009, Lexapro 10 - 20 mg, CT WD w/severe depression and anxiety: 2010-2015, Paxil, 30 - 40 mg, tapered off at 10 mg/week, moderate anxiety and depression: 2010-2015, Clonozapam 0.25 mg, as needed for anxiety and sleep: 1/10/2015, Zoloft 25 mg, tried to increase to 50 and 75, but nausea and dizziness: 2/13/2015, Paxil 5 mg, added back after 2 weeks at zero to reduce WD: 2/28/2015, Paxil 10 mg, increased from 5 mg to reduce WD, HOLDING: 3/04/2015, Zoloft discontinued (reduced to ~12.5 mg on 2/19, ~6.25 mg on 2/26, then zero): 4/26/2015, Paxil starting 10% taper (no scale so was inadvertently at 20% taper, yikes!): 4/30/2015, Paxil 10 mg, reinstated (WD disappeared between August 2015 and May 2016) 5/02/2016, Started 10% taper, reinstated to 10 mg on 5/11/16: 4/29/2017, Last dose of Paxil (working with holistic psychiatrist, lots of supplements to aid WD): Primary symptoms: apathy, demotivation, anhedonia, fatigue, stress intolerance, moderate social anxiety 7/1/2018 Finally feeling like myself again, success!!! Praise God! Even with the stress of relocating recently, I am feeling pretty good most of the time now. Granted, I eat healthy, I exercise, I don't drink caffeine or alcohol and I try hard find a healthy balance of quiet and social times. Hang in there and keep the faith, you can do it too! Link to comment
LostInTheWoods Posted June 22, 2017 Share Posted June 22, 2017 Nice to see you hanging around, Prestorb. Totally relate to the lack of motivation to go with basic aspects of life. Used to be proud of my cooking and ready to experiment new dishes and flavours but as of late I can't get any more excited for a gourmet meal than I would for fast food. Keeping "relationship maintenance" is daunting indeed but it's totally worth it, even if it doesn't feel like that during the bad days. Name LostInTheWoods evokes both the feeling of getting stranded, forsaken and alone in an alien, hostile environment and the chance to experience awareness, tranquility and self-discovery during the experience. Just call me Lost in the posts. February 2012. After a crisis, a crippling anxiety that culminated in a panic attack. Started 20 mg Paxil and Clonazepam. Clonazepam left quickly in the 2nd attempt. About about a year on 20 mg, begin tapering. June 2014, after several weeks on 5 mg and trying to dose down, went CT. May 2015.Anxiety came back again, went to psychiatrist back. Fluoxetine was tried and left because of bad reaction, returned to paroxetine. Start tapering in mid 2016. December 2016. After like 2 months of going 2,5 mg, stopped paroxetine. Truth to be told, descended into a downward spiral of caffeine, alcohol and masturbation. January 26, 2017. Wave with some tinnitus that was fixed by a visit to the ENT. April 21, 2017. Acid reflux at night was a stressor that triggered another wave.Vices have been put into check and only a drink or two a week remain. By May 7 stabilized with a little anxiety left and some pains. Link to comment
Prestorb Posted June 23, 2017 Author Share Posted June 23, 2017 Thanks for stopping by my thread Lost, I enjoy reading your posts! Hang in there.... we are getting better and better everyday in everyday, we just can't always feel it. 2005-2009, Lexapro 10 - 20 mg, CT WD w/severe depression and anxiety: 2010-2015, Paxil, 30 - 40 mg, tapered off at 10 mg/week, moderate anxiety and depression: 2010-2015, Clonozapam 0.25 mg, as needed for anxiety and sleep: 1/10/2015, Zoloft 25 mg, tried to increase to 50 and 75, but nausea and dizziness: 2/13/2015, Paxil 5 mg, added back after 2 weeks at zero to reduce WD: 2/28/2015, Paxil 10 mg, increased from 5 mg to reduce WD, HOLDING: 3/04/2015, Zoloft discontinued (reduced to ~12.5 mg on 2/19, ~6.25 mg on 2/26, then zero): 4/26/2015, Paxil starting 10% taper (no scale so was inadvertently at 20% taper, yikes!): 4/30/2015, Paxil 10 mg, reinstated (WD disappeared between August 2015 and May 2016) 5/02/2016, Started 10% taper, reinstated to 10 mg on 5/11/16: 4/29/2017, Last dose of Paxil (working with holistic psychiatrist, lots of supplements to aid WD): Primary symptoms: apathy, demotivation, anhedonia, fatigue, stress intolerance, moderate social anxiety 7/1/2018 Finally feeling like myself again, success!!! Praise God! Even with the stress of relocating recently, I am feeling pretty good most of the time now. Granted, I eat healthy, I exercise, I don't drink caffeine or alcohol and I try hard find a healthy balance of quiet and social times. Hang in there and keep the faith, you can do it too! Link to comment
Prestorb Posted July 6, 2017 Author Share Posted July 6, 2017 Coming up on 9 weeks Paxil free now and hanging in there, lots of prayer and spiritual growth (I think, or at least lots of reading with that intent). Sleep comes and goes, with a better night being 5 hours straight and then a few more disruptive hours to equal out to a decent night of sleep. A worse night being 3 or less hours at a time, with only a total a 5 leaving me feely pretty tired most of the day. Motivation is still a big issue, lately I feel I am on a negative trend with doing less and less so I have to work on that. The summer schedule is constantly changing and that doesn't help me at all, I find transitions very difficult still. The skin rashes seem to have settled down so now I am just using some anti fungal soap in the shower and the tea tree oil solution, and haven't had any itchiness to deal with - yay! Emotional upset and teariness are about the same, not more than once or twice a week normally leaving me with just a general flatness. Most of the time, I can perk up a bit when talking to others though so that is a good sign I think. It just doesn't stay with me. Not where I would like to be obviously, but also nothing terrible unless I make it that way in my mind, so I am thankful for less severe symptoms of withdrawal. Like others here, I find the duration of this process to be a great lesson in patience and spiritual growth. I take comfort in trusting that God is good even when I don't understand his ways, nothing draws me closer to him than when I am made painfully aware of how little I am actually in control of this process. It continues to be a humbling experience. But again, I am so thankful to be completely OFF of the drugs and at this point, have no desire to try anything new. Maybe one thing I've learned is that quick fixes aren't lasting and as slow and painful as this process is, I think it's something I need to work through for my own emotional and spiritual growth. 2005-2009, Lexapro 10 - 20 mg, CT WD w/severe depression and anxiety: 2010-2015, Paxil, 30 - 40 mg, tapered off at 10 mg/week, moderate anxiety and depression: 2010-2015, Clonozapam 0.25 mg, as needed for anxiety and sleep: 1/10/2015, Zoloft 25 mg, tried to increase to 50 and 75, but nausea and dizziness: 2/13/2015, Paxil 5 mg, added back after 2 weeks at zero to reduce WD: 2/28/2015, Paxil 10 mg, increased from 5 mg to reduce WD, HOLDING: 3/04/2015, Zoloft discontinued (reduced to ~12.5 mg on 2/19, ~6.25 mg on 2/26, then zero): 4/26/2015, Paxil starting 10% taper (no scale so was inadvertently at 20% taper, yikes!): 4/30/2015, Paxil 10 mg, reinstated (WD disappeared between August 2015 and May 2016) 5/02/2016, Started 10% taper, reinstated to 10 mg on 5/11/16: 4/29/2017, Last dose of Paxil (working with holistic psychiatrist, lots of supplements to aid WD): Primary symptoms: apathy, demotivation, anhedonia, fatigue, stress intolerance, moderate social anxiety 7/1/2018 Finally feeling like myself again, success!!! Praise God! Even with the stress of relocating recently, I am feeling pretty good most of the time now. Granted, I eat healthy, I exercise, I don't drink caffeine or alcohol and I try hard find a healthy balance of quiet and social times. Hang in there and keep the faith, you can do it too! Link to comment
Prestorb Posted August 6, 2017 Author Share Posted August 6, 2017 Its been a rough couple of weeks emotionally and I think at least part of it is hormonal imbalance, which I won't go into detail about here. But I'm almost 49 and it's that time of life, joy. I'm also going on a real vacation tomorrow for the first time in a long time and I think I have been feeling a fair amount of stress over that. My cognitive abilities are still not what they used to be and with the hormonal component, that may not change for some time but it makes planning, organizing and prioritizing very stressful. And I've just been a lot more irritable, negative, emotional and teary than I had been - I was more flat and apathetic. But I guess it's just my body's way of trying to get back to normal. Fortunately, sleep has still been good enough - 4 or 5 hours, pretty solid usually and then a couple more or so hours of broken sleep. I'm a homemaker and with school out, I have been sleeping in a fair amount. Partly because I don't have much motivation to get up and partly because I know I probably need all the rest I can get right now. Once I get going, it seems my energy level is pretty decent and really beginning to improve. I don't need to just sit down or lie down and rest all the time like I did for quite a while. I am still taking quite a lot of supplements under the direction of a holistic psychiatrist and have been trying to limit sugar, gluten and dairy intake. Not sure that is doing much but I do notice less nasal congestion when I don't drink or eat dairy - which I happen to love! And the sugar and gluten just tend to make me tired it seems, no stomach upset with any of it. And then I have the 14 year old son that is at such a joyful age (NOT!), that can be very stressful at times. Thank God school starts in another month. It was so nice to have break from the taking and picking up, but this boy needs something (besides me and the computer) to keep him occupied. Today has been a pretty decent day, so I am very thankful for that. One day at a time... :-) 2005-2009, Lexapro 10 - 20 mg, CT WD w/severe depression and anxiety: 2010-2015, Paxil, 30 - 40 mg, tapered off at 10 mg/week, moderate anxiety and depression: 2010-2015, Clonozapam 0.25 mg, as needed for anxiety and sleep: 1/10/2015, Zoloft 25 mg, tried to increase to 50 and 75, but nausea and dizziness: 2/13/2015, Paxil 5 mg, added back after 2 weeks at zero to reduce WD: 2/28/2015, Paxil 10 mg, increased from 5 mg to reduce WD, HOLDING: 3/04/2015, Zoloft discontinued (reduced to ~12.5 mg on 2/19, ~6.25 mg on 2/26, then zero): 4/26/2015, Paxil starting 10% taper (no scale so was inadvertently at 20% taper, yikes!): 4/30/2015, Paxil 10 mg, reinstated (WD disappeared between August 2015 and May 2016) 5/02/2016, Started 10% taper, reinstated to 10 mg on 5/11/16: 4/29/2017, Last dose of Paxil (working with holistic psychiatrist, lots of supplements to aid WD): Primary symptoms: apathy, demotivation, anhedonia, fatigue, stress intolerance, moderate social anxiety 7/1/2018 Finally feeling like myself again, success!!! Praise God! Even with the stress of relocating recently, I am feeling pretty good most of the time now. Granted, I eat healthy, I exercise, I don't drink caffeine or alcohol and I try hard find a healthy balance of quiet and social times. Hang in there and keep the faith, you can do it too! Link to comment
Prestorb Posted November 9, 2017 Author Share Posted November 9, 2017 Sleep has been terrible for two months now. But I think I triggered it by adjusting the dosages of the bioidentical hormones that I am using. I also apparently triggered hot flashes! So it's not been a very fun time. I seem to alternate between being depressed and overwhelmed, with some rage thrown in as well. Quite the emotional roller coaster. Mornings have been especially awful because I sleep so terribly, waking every 1-2 hours, usually having a hot flash, and sometimes unable to get back to sleep for 2-3 hours. BUT some days, I end up feeling much better as the day progresses and have a really decent day. So I guess maybe those are my windows right now, and they happen once sometimes twice a week. Supposedly estrogen therapy is supposed to get rid of the hot flashes and help with sleep - once the dose is right, but I'm not there yet although I am seeing improvement I think. My cognitive functioning is really lousy with the poor sleep so that of course makes life difficult. I pray a lot and try to remain optimistic and look for improvement, but this is a very long process that requires a whole lot of patience. Just wanted to post an update as a "post zero" member. I wish it were more positive, but the symptoms are definitely changing so I think that is progress. 2005-2009, Lexapro 10 - 20 mg, CT WD w/severe depression and anxiety: 2010-2015, Paxil, 30 - 40 mg, tapered off at 10 mg/week, moderate anxiety and depression: 2010-2015, Clonozapam 0.25 mg, as needed for anxiety and sleep: 1/10/2015, Zoloft 25 mg, tried to increase to 50 and 75, but nausea and dizziness: 2/13/2015, Paxil 5 mg, added back after 2 weeks at zero to reduce WD: 2/28/2015, Paxil 10 mg, increased from 5 mg to reduce WD, HOLDING: 3/04/2015, Zoloft discontinued (reduced to ~12.5 mg on 2/19, ~6.25 mg on 2/26, then zero): 4/26/2015, Paxil starting 10% taper (no scale so was inadvertently at 20% taper, yikes!): 4/30/2015, Paxil 10 mg, reinstated (WD disappeared between August 2015 and May 2016) 5/02/2016, Started 10% taper, reinstated to 10 mg on 5/11/16: 4/29/2017, Last dose of Paxil (working with holistic psychiatrist, lots of supplements to aid WD): Primary symptoms: apathy, demotivation, anhedonia, fatigue, stress intolerance, moderate social anxiety 7/1/2018 Finally feeling like myself again, success!!! Praise God! Even with the stress of relocating recently, I am feeling pretty good most of the time now. Granted, I eat healthy, I exercise, I don't drink caffeine or alcohol and I try hard find a healthy balance of quiet and social times. Hang in there and keep the faith, you can do it too! Link to comment
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