dreamchaser: Can the brain recover from antipsychotics?

[Addax]

As I sit and reflect on life i am finding it hard to find a purpose when all the things i was good at and loved i am no longer good at or interested in. I now worry about the future of my career, i was on track to get into a business management career but had to turn the offer down because of my withdrawl and brain fog. I feel like life will never be the same anymore and it scares me  I am young and should be enjoying life and making progress in life but I am at a stand still and don't know how long it will be before I'm back to my normal self.[/font][/color]

Dreamchaser, I'm sorry for your horrible experience. You're right, you should be enjoying life and making progress... And you will. Yes, this is a setback, no question, but I'll bet it's temporary. That feeling that you are some how "stuck" where you are and will be forever is, I sincerely believe, in and of itself a symptom of withdrawal... Or at the very least a typical thinking pattern that coincides with this awful experience. More than typical. I'd even say it's a standard. AND it's scary as hell because no matter how hard we try, when feeling like you do now it feels impossible to picture anything positive and we start to view even benign things as "evidence" of permanent damage. We also tend to only believe the bad things we read, completely disregarding positive and REAL evidence. This is known as confirmation bias, and it takes on a super power during withdrawal.

 

There are so many commonalities among people's symptoms in withdrawal, but We also all experience this awful journey differently so it's not possible to really predict how long the journey will last. But that you have been on mess for a relatively short time is in your favor. Our brains adapt at different rates, but they are much more plastic than previously thought. It takes time for our brains to adapt to drugs, then it takes time for it to adapt to their absence.

 

You will reach that light at the end of the tunnel. It's just hard to see because the tunnel isn't straight. :-)

[Songbird]

That feeling that you are some how "stuck" where you are and will be forever is, I sincerely believe, in and of itself a symptom of withdrawal... Or at the very least a typical thinking pattern that coincides with this awful experience. More than typical. I'd even say it's a standard.

 

Yep, very typical withdrawal symptom.  You may not be able to stop it, but you can at least observe it and understand that it is withdrawal, not you.  Withdrawal throws these thoughts at you, but you can choose not to believe them.

[JanCarol]

Hey Dream - 

 

There are no medical tests for withdrawal.  By all means, if you think your symptoms are indicative of a medical problem (like residuals from that head injury, for example, or concerns over your heart's behaviour, for example) do get those checked out.

 

But be wary of saying, the words "withdrawal from socially acceptable psych drugs" to most practitioners.  They don't believe it. They believe that the symptoms from the drugs end when the half-life is over and the chemical is released from your liver, etc.  NOT when your brain is bouncing around trying to rebuild itself after the damage done by the drugs.  The former only takes a few weeks, the latter, depending on the individual, can take years.

What to expect from my doctor

 

The good news is, you are young, you were not on any one drug for very long.  You had SEVERAL bounce through your system in a short course, which is why you got so severely disregulated.  But when the brain stops bouncing (and be patient, it may take a month or more), you will start to see windows.

 

Windows and waves come as the structure of the brain heals itself.  A wave, as awful as it is, is an indicator of the system which is trying to balance itself.  So if it is restlessness, you can come through the other side.  Each system will have it's own series of waves, sometimes more than one system at once.  It can be scary and difficult.  But then the window comes, and you remember you are healing.  Try to remember you are healing, even as you have symptoms.

 

Some of us repeat the phrase:  this is only withdrawal.  A million times a day if need be - to remind our poor brain that this condition is temporary, and healing.  The brain is amazingly forgiving.  The drugs can be positively criminal.

 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/82-the-windows-and-waves-pattern-of-recovery/

 

Did you get to the neurologist?  It's now been awhile since you quit the Zoloft - are you feeling better from that?

 

If you keep a record here, you will see, over time, how you improved.  You may think you are doing poorly - then read from a few months ago and realize, "but it is not as bad as that!"

[dreamchaser]

 

As I sit and reflect on life i am finding it hard to find a purpose when all the things i was good at and loved i am no longer good at or interested in. I now worry about the future of my career, i was on track to get into a business management career but had to turn the offer down because of my withdrawl and brain fog. I feel like life will never be the same anymore and it scares me  I am young and should be enjoying life and making progress in life but I am at a stand still and don't know how long it will be before I'm back to my normal self.[/font][/color]

Dreamchaser, I'm sorry for your horrible experience. You're right, you should be enjoying life and making progress... And you will. Yes, this is a setback, no question, but I'll bet it's temporary. That feeling that you are some how "stuck" where you are and will be forever is, I sincerely believe, in and of itself a symptom of withdrawal... Or at the very least a typical thinking pattern that coincides with this awful experience. More than typical. I'd even say it's a standard. AND it's scary as hell because no matter how hard we try, when feeling like you do now it feels impossible to picture anything positive and we start to view even benign things as "evidence" of permanent damage. We also tend to only believe the bad things we read, completely disregarding positive and REAL evidence. This is known as confirmation bias, and it takes on a super power during withdrawal.

 

There are so many commonalities among people's symptoms in withdrawal, but We also all experience this awful journey differently so it's not possible to really predict how long the journey will last. But that you have been on mess for a relatively short time is in your favor. Our brains adapt at different rates, but they are much more plastic than previously thought. It takes time for our brains to adapt to drugs, then it takes time for it to adapt to their absence.

 

You will reach that light at the end of the tunnel. It's just hard to see because the tunnel isn't straight. :-)

 

Thanks for the response Addax, I apperciate and value you everyone's input I am very greatful for the support I have received from memembers and moderators. Things are getting slightly better and I know things will continue to improve with time i just have to remain positive, and do everything in my power to assist my brain in healing i.e live a healthy lifestyle, by exercising and diet, continue to take fish oil and magnisium. Yesterday i got a copy of "Mad in america" and "anatomy of and epidemic" (thanks Rhi for the suggestions) and I can actually sit down and read them I was unable to do this a month ago so thats a definite plus.

[dreamchaser]

 

That feeling that you are some how "stuck" where you are and will be forever is, I sincerely believe, in and of itself a symptom of withdrawal... Or at the very least a typical thinking pattern that coincides with this awful experience. More than typical. I'd even say it's a standard.

 

Yep, very typical withdrawal symptom.  You may not be able to stop it, but you can at least observe it and understand that it is withdrawal, not you.  Withdrawal throws these thoughts at you, but you can choose not to believe them.

 

Agreed songbird these thoughts have been persistant throughout withdrawl, I must remain positive and have faith that things will return to normal and I will be able to move on with my life

[dreamchaser]

Hey Dream - 

 

There are no medical tests for withdrawal.  By all means, if you think your symptoms are indicative of a medical problem (like residuals from that head injury, for example, or concerns over your heart's behaviour, for example) do get those checked out.

 

But be wary of saying, the words "withdrawal from socially acceptable psych drugs" to most practitioners.  They don't believe it. They believe that the symptoms from the drugs end when the half-life is over and the chemical is released from your liver, etc.  NOT when your brain is bouncing around trying to rebuild itself after the damage done by the drugs.  The former only takes a few weeks, the latter, depending on the individual, can take years.

What to expect from my doctor

 

The good news is, you are young, you were not on any one drug for very long.  You had SEVERAL bounce through your system in a short course, which is why you got so severely disregulated.  But when the brain stops bouncing (and be patient, it may take a month or more), you will start to see windows.

 

Windows and waves come as the structure of the brain heals itself.  A wave, as awful as it is, is an indicator of the system which is trying to balance itself.  So if it is restlessness, you can come through the other side.  Each system will have it's own series of waves, sometimes more than one system at once.  It can be scary and difficult.  But then the window comes, and you remember you are healing.  Try to remember you are healing, even as you have symptoms.

 

Some of us repeat the phrase:  this is only withdrawal.  A million times a day if need be - to remind our poor brain that this condition is temporary, and healing.  The brain is amazingly forgiving.  The drugs can be positively criminal.

 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/82-the-windows-and-waves-pattern-of-recovery/

 

Did you get to the neurologist?  It's now been awhile since you quit the Zoloft - are you feeling better from that?

 

If you keep a record here, you will see, over time, how you improved.  You may think you are doing poorly - then read from a few months ago and realize, "but it is not as bad as that!"

 

Jan thanks for the response, I saw my GP this morning and she was by far the best Doctor I've had through out this whole ordeal. She didn't acknowledge Withdrawl syndrome since she does not deal with any psych meds, she did diagnose me with post concussion syndrome and referred me to a neruologist and optomeetrist both of which i wont be ab;e to see until mid May. Since stopping the medication I do feel slightly better however since stopping the trazodone i feel sluggish in the mornings and wake up a few times a night then awake early in the morning around 6 or 7 am. Still having other issues such as sexual dysfunction, cognitive function ( memory and concentration) Anhedonia the inability to feel pleasure is really draining and saps all the joy out of life i wish that symptom would hurry up and go away then the rest wouldnt be as bad. Ive read the section on windows and waves and have experienced both, had a window a few weeks ago and wrote a poem, which I havent been able to do since last June.  

[Freedom15]

Hi Dreamchaser withdrawal from these types of drugs can be so hard and at times feel like you are never going to be well again. You will find tho over time it will get easier and you will feel better. No one can say how long it can take but from reading your posts it sounds like some things have changed a little and this very small changes is how the healing go's. I understand how you feel about lose about things around you and also internally. When I am at my points of breaking which I have been through many over the past few months you will eventually get through them to and make into the other side. The biggest thing is to remember that you are not alone in all this. draw strength from the community and from the people who are further on the journey. I have been having such ruff times since December but recently it's got a little easier and parts of my personality are starting to return. Try keep diary and to write how feel so you can look back and see the better times as generally our heads just focus on the negativity of what's going on and convince us we will always be like this. Hope things get easier for you soon.

[dreamchaser]

hi guys and gals, it has been a few months since my last post and I just wanted to give an update. I have some good news to share as well as some bad. Ill start with the good I started back talking to one of my exes and things are going good I'm able to be intimate and have sex again (at this same time last year i couldn't). I get out a little more i long board quite often and go to the gym a few times a week. On to the bad news the struggle still continues im having a rough time at work my memory problems are causing a lot of stress for me at work. I work on cars and sometimes i forget to do minor things like change a taillight or headlight or checking the alingment on a vehicle, all minor things but this is starting to annoy me and some of my managers. I try to take my time so i don't miss anything but they then complain about this also so it's kin d of a lose lose. I'm still hoping things return to normal as i am closing in on a year since my whole ordeal with meds began and right now im still lost trying to find my way in the world and hopefully I will be able to find joy and happiness once again in my life. I keep reading different forums and people talk a lot about creating a new "you" after withdrawl syndrome and i find it hard to rebuild a personlity a self that took a lifetime to build but hey i guess thats the only option we have left. I hope everyone is doing good and making progress through withdrawl. Feel free to reply or pm. Best wishes- Dream_Chaser

[Fresh]

That sounds like pretty promising update Dreamchaser , thanks for sharing.

A year out isn't long in the scheme of things , and you've had significant improvement on all fronts.

 

Really happy for you , sending a hug ,

 

Fresh

[dreamchaser]

Hey guys, I was doing good for a while I thought I had recovered then things took a nasty turn for the worst I went through what can best be described as a manic episode and got into trouble for fighting and ended up in jail for three months. Life since then has been a constant struggle I feel so lost in the world, I'm suffering through depression and insomnia I get no more than 4 or 5 hours of sleep a day. I feel like I'm back in the same place I was when all this began.I don't know what I want in life anymore living like this is unbearable

[ZombieMode]

Hey mate, just checking in with you to make sure all is okay? It's been a few months since you last posted and forgive me for being a little too curious, but am keen on an update. Really do hope things have switched pace and are improving. Best wishes, Zombie
 

[dreamchaser]

zombiemode, things for me havent improved i feel like im stuck in a constant state of depression nothing in life feels enjoyable anymore, life doesnt even feel the same anymore.my views, and aspirations have changed i dont think or view things the way i did before all thi happened. 

[AliG]

Dreamchaser. I know you probably won't believe me when I say it will get better. You have had a lot of ups and downs and cold turkeys. It can certainly take a while after all that - I know, but slowly and incrementally the light starts to come on . Even after all that , there are still windows and waves to go through but no matter what , there is always that light blinking in the distance, even when it starts to go dim and flicker that keeps pointing you in the direction of healing and recovery. If you just keep hanging on , you will get to that place eventually. Set your compass with purpose and keep heading for your  " true north ".

Ali

[Plshelp]

On 8/14/2016 at 9:25 AM, dreamchaser said:

zombiemode, things for me havent improved i feel like im stuck in a constant state of depression nothing in life feels enjoyable anymore, life doesnt even feel the same anymore.my views, and aspirations have changed i dont think or view things the way i did before all thi happened. 

Dreamchaser, 

How have you been? Any improvements? 

Thx, 

Brandi

[dreamchaser]

Hello everyone and Happy Easter to all! It has been a while and i wanted to give a update. since my last post a lot ha happened I"m now in a relationship and i have a 3 month old son, I recently received a promotion at work to the lead/supervisor of my shop. But despite all of this my struggle continues. I have been going through tough times lately. I struggle with brain fog so bad that i struggle holding conversations with people, like my mind is just blank and i can't find the words to say. This causes my anxiety to shoot through the roof and makes me uncomfortable around people. At the present I still feel lost still trying to find my purpose, my son is the only thing that keeps me going. Each and every day i go through the motions at work just doing all that I can do just to make it through the day. At work I feel socially awkward and I feel my coworkers may see me as weird, which now makes going to work depressing some days. I still feel emotionally l numb, I know some days my girlfriend questions if I love her or not, simply because its hard for me to express something I am numb to. We often argue and we are both at our wits end. I really don't know what to do any more.

[Carmie]

Hi dreamchaser, 

 

Just checking in to see how you’re doing. Sending hugs🤗