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Dane22: Attempting to stop prozac


Dane22

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Hi Dane22, thanks for your comment on my thread. All you can do is take it one day at a time and put one foot in front of the other. Due to the fact that you were taking your prozac sporadically and didn't have a steady stream of it in you, you might get off a little easier on the WD. Here is hoping!! ????

Diagnosed: Pure O Ocd, Severe Anxiety Disorder NOS, PMDD

 

November 2009 - May 2013- CIPRALEX 20mg

C/T off 20mg Cipralex

Went into dark depression (never experienced before med)

September 2013 - March 2014- PROZAC 20mg

Weaned down to 10mg and held

October 1st 2014 C/T off 10mg Prozac

Protracted withdrawal - 8 months of the most horrific suffering imaginable

June 1st 2015 - ZOLOFT 25mg

June 26th 2015 - Dose increase to 50mg of Zoloft (taken at night after dinner). Slowly improving but still have severe OCD/ruminating, intense DP/DR, and brain fog. Just trying to stabilize at this point.

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Thank you justwanttobefree. I hope today is a better day for you.

 

Day 10 CT. Slept a solid five hours last night, alarm woke me, wonder how much longer I would have slept? Mild headache for the morning. Agitated last night and this morning. Im glad I was aware of it and I tried my best to handle it with patience. I'm aware of my shortcomings at this point. I'm glad I can see and feel some of the abnormalities I have as a result of the Prozac and the sudden CT from it.

 

lastly, feeling a little tired and drained from all of this. maybe I'll just chill today and rent some movies. Cook a good din din and work on being grateful that I've made it this far and I'm not worse off.

September 2013. Diagnosed depression/anxiety. Start Prozac 10mg and slowly increase to 40mg.

October 2013. Lorazepam 0.5mg prescribed for anxiety after complaining about nervous energy

November 2013. prescribed a sleeping pill (name?) for insomnia. took once. ineffective.

January to June 2014. psychiatrist agrees to lower dose to 15 mg due to side effects.

August 2014 first attempt to quit cold turkey Lasted August 1, 2014 until October 1, 2014

November 2014 second attempt to quit cold turkey lasted Novemember 4, 2014 until Jan 13, 2015

January 2015 3rd attempt to quit cold turkey lasted feb 3, 2015 until feb 23, 2015

March 5, 2015 4th attempt to quit cold turkey.

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thank you Sarasmiles.

 

Day 11CT. thinking about how nice it would be to forget one day to log on and read/post here. Not a good day. The day itself is fine, productive, went for my five mile run. Anyone else would be content with this day, maybe even happy. For whatever reason, I'm just down. Not sure why. Still have residual Prozac in me. I just cant seem to see the glass as half full today. I know that I need to learn how to deal with depression if I want to be free of AD medications. This just sucks today.

 

Well, its only 340pm here. I have more work to do. At the minimum. ill be able to go to bed tonight with a feeling of accomplishment.

 

Yucky. Tomorrow is a new day. I hope it'll be better.

September 2013. Diagnosed depression/anxiety. Start Prozac 10mg and slowly increase to 40mg.

October 2013. Lorazepam 0.5mg prescribed for anxiety after complaining about nervous energy

November 2013. prescribed a sleeping pill (name?) for insomnia. took once. ineffective.

January to June 2014. psychiatrist agrees to lower dose to 15 mg due to side effects.

August 2014 first attempt to quit cold turkey Lasted August 1, 2014 until October 1, 2014

November 2014 second attempt to quit cold turkey lasted Novemember 4, 2014 until Jan 13, 2015

January 2015 3rd attempt to quit cold turkey lasted feb 3, 2015 until feb 23, 2015

March 5, 2015 4th attempt to quit cold turkey.

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Dane, I'm not Judging or condemning, but I'm curious. Why are you choosing to quit cold turkey?

1988-2012: Prozac @ 60mg (with a few stops and starts)

Fall 2012: Returned to 40mg after discontinuing and horrid withdrawal 

Fall 2013: 40mg Fluoxetine, added 150mg Wellbutrin to treat fatigue 

Winter 2014: Attempting to taper both (too fast)

April 2014: 9mg Fluoxetine + 37.5 Wellbutrin 

Summer 2014: 8 mg Fluoxetine + 0 Wellbutrin (way too fast a drop)

Late summer/Early Fall 2014: Debilitating Withdrawal symptoms 

Fall 2014 - Wellbutrin successfully kicked to the curb but…

Oct- Dec 2014: Panicked reinstatement of Fluoxetine ->30mg - held for 5yrs

Jan 2021: taper to 20mg Fluoxetine  then tapering by 1mg every 2-3 months

Fall 2022 - held at 10mg->December 2022: 9mg->Feb 2023: 8mg ->March 2023: brassmonkey slide begins: 7.8mg -> 7.6 -> 7.4->2 week hold (April)->7.2->7mg->6.8->2 week hold->6.6-> 1-month hold ->(June)-6.5->4-week hold-> (July)-6.4 (discontinued brassmonkey slide and slowed taper)-> (Aug)-6.2->(Sept)-6.0->(Oct)-5.9->(Nov)-5.8->(Dec)-5.7->wave!->(Jan)-5.8->(Feb)-6mg and holding.

 

My 2014 withdrawal experience: https://rxisk.org/antidepressant-withdrawal-a-prozac-story/

 

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Hey Addax. I actually have been going back and forth since last August. I know, totally not healthy to go CT then reinstate over and over. This last time, I was at 15 and decided to go CT THEN I found this site.

 

I know I could reinstate at a low dose and try a slow wean. It's still an option I consider frequently. At first, I considered it daily, but it's less and less now.

 

Unlike being on Prozac, I can say I'm functional now. Not happy, not wothout symptoms of withdrawal. If anyone is reading this that is considering CT, my story is far from a success story and I don't advocate CT. It's just the path I've chosen.

 

It's ok Addax. Everyone is entitled to their opinions. I know the feedback I recieve here is out of concern and people want to see others have as smooth a transition as possible. It's human nature to want to care for others and help them.

 

I'm not sure I'm doing the right thing. I don't know that I'm on the right path. But what I do know is that I slept 7 hours last night. That is a good sign. I also know I cannot lay down during the day, no matter what. If I do, my mind wonders and I end up throwing the biggest pity party for myself. Then...the next day I beat myself up because I'm that much further behind.

September 2013. Diagnosed depression/anxiety. Start Prozac 10mg and slowly increase to 40mg.

October 2013. Lorazepam 0.5mg prescribed for anxiety after complaining about nervous energy

November 2013. prescribed a sleeping pill (name?) for insomnia. took once. ineffective.

January to June 2014. psychiatrist agrees to lower dose to 15 mg due to side effects.

August 2014 first attempt to quit cold turkey Lasted August 1, 2014 until October 1, 2014

November 2014 second attempt to quit cold turkey lasted Novemember 4, 2014 until Jan 13, 2015

January 2015 3rd attempt to quit cold turkey lasted feb 3, 2015 until feb 23, 2015

March 5, 2015 4th attempt to quit cold turkey.

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Depression sucks. It just does.  But it will pass. The sun will come out again, and you will feel joy and pleasure again. Hang on, have faith, and know that sleep is a wonderful time for your brain to heal!

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Thank you Sarasmiles. It's already a bit better. Made myself start cleaning the garage. Sense of accomplishment.

September 2013. Diagnosed depression/anxiety. Start Prozac 10mg and slowly increase to 40mg.

October 2013. Lorazepam 0.5mg prescribed for anxiety after complaining about nervous energy

November 2013. prescribed a sleeping pill (name?) for insomnia. took once. ineffective.

January to June 2014. psychiatrist agrees to lower dose to 15 mg due to side effects.

August 2014 first attempt to quit cold turkey Lasted August 1, 2014 until October 1, 2014

November 2014 second attempt to quit cold turkey lasted Novemember 4, 2014 until Jan 13, 2015

January 2015 3rd attempt to quit cold turkey lasted feb 3, 2015 until feb 23, 2015

March 5, 2015 4th attempt to quit cold turkey.

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Day 12 CT.

 

Yesterday was not good. Mild headache and moderate depression. No reason for it, everything is fine, but felt really down. Passed late this morning. Things are fine now. Head feels odd.

 

On the bright side (always acknowledge the good with the bad), appetite is good. Sleeping much better. Periods of feeling good today (not happy, but I'll gladly take good).

 

Psychotherapist this Thursday. Not sure if I mentioned this, my psychotherapist is the only person that is supporting me through this. Kinda of sucks. Relatives, best friend, partner...all of them not thrilled with my CT. So those of you who feel I'm going down the wrong path, it's ok. I understand. Just try not to beat me up on a bad day. Actually, you can beat me up today, it was a good day! I have broad shoulders today. Lol.

 

Keep smiling everyone. Fake it till we make it.

September 2013. Diagnosed depression/anxiety. Start Prozac 10mg and slowly increase to 40mg.

October 2013. Lorazepam 0.5mg prescribed for anxiety after complaining about nervous energy

November 2013. prescribed a sleeping pill (name?) for insomnia. took once. ineffective.

January to June 2014. psychiatrist agrees to lower dose to 15 mg due to side effects.

August 2014 first attempt to quit cold turkey Lasted August 1, 2014 until October 1, 2014

November 2014 second attempt to quit cold turkey lasted Novemember 4, 2014 until Jan 13, 2015

January 2015 3rd attempt to quit cold turkey lasted feb 3, 2015 until feb 23, 2015

March 5, 2015 4th attempt to quit cold turkey.

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No beat ups, Dane. Only love and best wishes. There are a few of us gobblers still hanging by our toenails and we'll make it through this hell too.

January 2012 - Prescribed 900mg gabapentin and 30mg Norco for lower lumber spinal stenosis pain.

September 2013 - Spinal fusion surgery, 6 levels. Hospital ramped up meds 1500mg gabapentin, 100mg Norco, 80mg Oxycontin, 25mg Fentanyl patch.

January 2014 - Sever nausea daily and with back pain every 4 hours. 2 trips to ER. First endoscopy found ulcer. Treated with Sucralfate and PPI. Second endo in May found no ulcers. Doctors said it was the opiates causing the nausea. CT'd Oxycontin, Fentanyl patch.

July 2014 - Lost 48 lbs. due to not eating because of severe nausea. GP prescribed Prozac 20mg and Ativan 2mg prn. Tried for 4 days, quit. Two week followup GP said keep taking Prozac. 4 days, quit again. Ativan taken rarely prn for anxiety and appetite.

August 2014 - Went to detox. Off opiates. Still nauseous, helmet head, drugged feeling. Doctor CT'd gabapentin. Ended up in ER. Found 2 gallstones. Gabapentin reinstated at 900mg. Tried botched up and down taper to get off Gabapentin. No tapering advice from doctor. Said to just CT again.

September 2014 - Coded on table during gallbladder surgery. Developed liver biloma due to CPR by doctor. Had bile bulb inserted for 2 wks to drain.

October 2014 - Gallbladder removed. Still nauseous, 3am cortisol surging, drugged helmet head, vertigo, breathlessness, whooshing head, heart palps.

November 8th, 2014 - CT'd gabapentin suggested by family and 4 different doctors. Was told no withdrawal is associated with gabapentin. Have been in hell ever since. No windows, just one big tsunami every day with same symptoms for 4 months.

December 26, 2014 - Found SA. At least I know I'm not insane. My family thinks I'm doing this to myself. Akathesia has become unbearable.

March 10, 2015 - In absolute daily hell with no relief. Currently taking magnesium 200mg before bedtime.

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Thanks Pugknows. ????

September 2013. Diagnosed depression/anxiety. Start Prozac 10mg and slowly increase to 40mg.

October 2013. Lorazepam 0.5mg prescribed for anxiety after complaining about nervous energy

November 2013. prescribed a sleeping pill (name?) for insomnia. took once. ineffective.

January to June 2014. psychiatrist agrees to lower dose to 15 mg due to side effects.

August 2014 first attempt to quit cold turkey Lasted August 1, 2014 until October 1, 2014

November 2014 second attempt to quit cold turkey lasted Novemember 4, 2014 until Jan 13, 2015

January 2015 3rd attempt to quit cold turkey lasted feb 3, 2015 until feb 23, 2015

March 5, 2015 4th attempt to quit cold turkey.

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Hey Dane,

I hope today is another good one for you!   

 

I'm glad your therapist supports you in this, and I can relate to how it feels not to have the support of others. I still haven't even told my husband that I'm doing this. I know, that probably sounds insane.  But here's the thing: for years he has told me I'm "too emotional", even when I just cry a little, or my voice cracks, or I get really tense.  He shuts me out when I show what he considers to be "too much" feeling.  This is a big part of why I've medicated myself for all these years; to try and be less emotional, cry less easily, and avoid distressing him with my feelings. Now that is insane.  You don't know me well, so I can just hope you can take me at my word when I say I a not histrionic. I am not dramatic. I do not weep and wail over little things, or use my sadness or tears to manipulate others. I am sensitive.  At least I am when I'm not medicated.  Anyway, if he knew I was going off my meds, he would attribute every feeling I express, every mood I showed, to withdrawal, and he would push me to resume taking the drug. I know this, because it's happened before.  So I can't make myself that vulnerable; not with him. Not with our history of my feeling unsupported.  

 

Sorry to have made that about me!  My point is, I think you are brave to do this in the face of the objections by your relatives, friends and partner. At least they know. They don't have to be thrilled, as long as they're kind to you about it. And good for you for not hiding it the way I am.  I haven't told anyone in my life, except my psychiatrist and my therapist. No one. 

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lol. this is my third and final attempt to post on my thread today. Getting frustrated.

 

Sarasmiles, thank you. It'll be nice to have a bad day someday just because we have one and not have it related to AD medications

 

day 14. two weeks. So far so good. too tired to attempt to post all the good and bad for a third time today. maybe later.

September 2013. Diagnosed depression/anxiety. Start Prozac 10mg and slowly increase to 40mg.

October 2013. Lorazepam 0.5mg prescribed for anxiety after complaining about nervous energy

November 2013. prescribed a sleeping pill (name?) for insomnia. took once. ineffective.

January to June 2014. psychiatrist agrees to lower dose to 15 mg due to side effects.

August 2014 first attempt to quit cold turkey Lasted August 1, 2014 until October 1, 2014

November 2014 second attempt to quit cold turkey lasted Novemember 4, 2014 until Jan 13, 2015

January 2015 3rd attempt to quit cold turkey lasted feb 3, 2015 until feb 23, 2015

March 5, 2015 4th attempt to quit cold turkey.

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Hey Dane: 

 

 

by the way, I think the rollercoaster takes off in a week or two (my 2-3 week CT date). Hang on!

 

Prozac is a long half-life drug. 

 

Most people do not begin to suffer until 29 days after CT.  The suffering could continue for over a year.  And could be extreme.

 

Please, you have been advised by mods to reinstate, even if only 5 mg (though 7.5 might be better, and Rhi said 10 and she knows more in her little pinky than I know with my whole brain!).  We can sit here and maybe, a crap shoot - you roll the dice and you get lucky.

 

But I would say that the dice are loaded against you.  You've done CT 3 times previously, why do you think this time is different?

 

Justwanttobefree reminds you:

 

 

The definition of insanity is doing the same thing again and again and expecting a different result. 

 

If you wait until Day 29, and you get your arse kicked, it may be too late to successfully reinstate. You are in a WOO - a Window Of Opportunity.  The longer you delay, the narrower that window gets.

 

Think of a deep sea diver:  He can dive down quickly (going on the Prozac) but if he comes up too quickly, he gets the bends.  It's almost a law of physics, and a similar thing applies to withdrawal.

 

We really want to see you get through this, and if you ignore our advice, we will be very unhappy when we are forced to say, "I told you so....."  Your pain hurts me, too.  Being a strong tough guy has nothing to do with brain chemicals.  Maybe you can run a military boot camp or ride a bucking bronco, drift your car, but in the face of bouncing brain (and you've bounced your brain a few times now - the more it bounces, the less elastic it becomes) - none of that bravado amounts to anything, and the brave bronco rider is reduced to a puddle of symptoms.

 

I'm not just putting out "worst case scenario" - I hate to suggest that this or that will happen to you - we don't know.  There is a chance you will get lucky and get out without too much suffering - but really - that is a tiny chance compared to the chance that prozac will rack you with symptoms again when you go into full withdrawal.

 

You're doing quite well, but it's still too early to tell.

 

Our vision of tapering allows you to control the symptoms, taper, hold, taper, hold (CRISIS) hold some more, wait, then taper when you are ready.  If you have job stress, family problems, or even the flu - you can wait and choose to taper when you are ready for it.

 

Look here, to see what is recommended, and why:  Tips for tapering off Prozac (fluoxetine)

"Easy, easy - just go easy and you'll finish." - Hawaiian Kapuna

 

Holding is hard work, holding is a blessing. Give your brain time to heal before you try again.

 

My suggestions are not medical advice, you are in charge of your own medical choices.

 

A lifetime of being prescribed antidepressants that caused problems (30 years in total). At age 35 flipped to "bipolar," but was not diagnosed for 5 years. Started my journey in Midwest United States. Crossed the Pacific for love and hope; currently living in Australia.   CT Seroquel 25 mg some time in 2013.   Tapered Reboxetine 4 mg Oct 2013 to Sept 2014 = GONE (3 years on Reboxetine).     Tapered Lithium 900 to 475 MG (alternating with the SNRI) Jan 2014 - Nov 2014, tapered Lithium 475 mg Jan 2015 -  Feb 2016 = GONE (10 years  on Lithium).  Many mistakes in dry cutting dosages were made.


The tedious thread (my intro):  JanCarol ☼ Reboxetine first, then Lithium

The happy thread (my success story):  JanCarol - Undiagnosed  Off all bipolar drugs

My own blog:  https://shamanexplorations.com/shamans-blog/

 

 

I have been psych drug FREE since 1 Feb 2016!

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 Dane has explained repeatedly and clearly why she ( or is it he?  I just realized I don't know for sure! Sorry, Dane!)  has done this cold turkey, and is reluctant to reinstate.  There comes a point at which it seems less supportive and more dictatorial to keep pushing one's point of view.   Dane has explained that the side effects of Prozac felt worse than the withdrawal has, and also that she/he has not taken it daily over the last many months. 

 

I also have to voice my objection to the approach I see on this site of making dire predictions.  I think we're all well aware of how difficult withdrawal has been for many people, and how difficult it may be for each of us as we proceed.  But I also think we need to be cognizant of the risk of self fulfilling prophecies.  We need hope, positive attitudes and optimism whenever and wherever we can find it.  If someone has cancer, but is in remission, would you say, "well, don't get too comfortable, because it's coming back and you are really going to suffer!"  Of course not. If they've decided to try radiation but not chemotherapy, or surgery but not radiation, would you repeatedly question their choice, predicting the worst possible outcome?  I hope not.  So  why do that here?  I don't get it.  None of us knows everything. None of us can predict how bad it's going to get.  Once someone has made a choice about their plan, why keep trying to scare them into changing it?

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Sarasmiles I do agree with your post but keep in mind Dane22 has cold turkey'ed 3 other times and failed. Why would this time be any different? Because he has found SA? That won't help at all in the throes of WD unfortunately, or we would all be better ???? I don't think anyone is trying to be rude or make Dane feel bad, we all would LOVE to see him succeed with no symptoms!!! We have to be realistic though and look at his history. I think everyone here knows what can happen so we are all just trying to save him from unnessassary pain and suffering!

Diagnosed: Pure O Ocd, Severe Anxiety Disorder NOS, PMDD

 

November 2009 - May 2013- CIPRALEX 20mg

C/T off 20mg Cipralex

Went into dark depression (never experienced before med)

September 2013 - March 2014- PROZAC 20mg

Weaned down to 10mg and held

October 1st 2014 C/T off 10mg Prozac

Protracted withdrawal - 8 months of the most horrific suffering imaginable

June 1st 2015 - ZOLOFT 25mg

June 26th 2015 - Dose increase to 50mg of Zoloft (taken at night after dinner). Slowly improving but still have severe OCD/ruminating, intense DP/DR, and brain fog. Just trying to stabilize at this point.

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Sarasmiles. Thank you. You were able to communicate exactly how I feel. You are much more articulate with your words than I am. I hope I offer you the same support. I had another good day yesterday, then I signed on and didn't feel supported. I've decided to stay on this site and seek out the support I need and leave the rest. I hope to lend support to others that need it, its also very therapeutic and helps give me an enhanced sense of purpose. You are a gem. (Oh, and I'm a guy. I guess the name can go either way. Yikes!)

 

Justwanttobe free. Please remember, on your thread, you were once advised to restart Prozac and chose not to. I have not had a therapeutic dose of Prozac in my system for the past 6 months. Yes, I have waves and windows.

 

JanCarol, I thank you for the time invested in the response.

 

I am not going back on Prozac, I have decided. If I fail, yes, I will. And yes, I will accept all the "I told you so" comments that come my way.

 

After being reminded time after time "you quit three times CT, what are you thinking". Well, I quit three times without a plan. Started self medicating with alcohol within a week each time. This time I have a plan and I am greatful it is working thus far.

 

Some advice. Perhaps asking "what are your plans to prevent a 4th failure?" or stopping by and asking "how are you" or sharing your journey so I feel less isolated or just any supportive comments would go much further than a reminder that I failed three times. I know I did. I live with me, every day.

 

I'm not going to let this get me down. My glass will be half full. I am going to keep on plugging along.

September 2013. Diagnosed depression/anxiety. Start Prozac 10mg and slowly increase to 40mg.

October 2013. Lorazepam 0.5mg prescribed for anxiety after complaining about nervous energy

November 2013. prescribed a sleeping pill (name?) for insomnia. took once. ineffective.

January to June 2014. psychiatrist agrees to lower dose to 15 mg due to side effects.

August 2014 first attempt to quit cold turkey Lasted August 1, 2014 until October 1, 2014

November 2014 second attempt to quit cold turkey lasted Novemember 4, 2014 until Jan 13, 2015

January 2015 3rd attempt to quit cold turkey lasted feb 3, 2015 until feb 23, 2015

March 5, 2015 4th attempt to quit cold turkey.

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My Plan.

 

seems to be effective at this time. 15 days CT.

 

No caffeine, nicotine, alcohol, refined sugars or white flour.

When a wave hits, I ride it out. No hiding. Embrace it, work through it. See if I can figure out where and why. Try not to obsess about it, worry about it.

Journal daily. Either here or my written journal.

Exercise daily. Run M-W-F and lift the other days.

No sleeping in late. No naps. Go to bed tired.

Be productive, everyday. At the end of the day, I can feel that I accomplished something. Even if it was a bad day.

Sign on to SA. Read other people journeys, it reminds me I'm not alone. Honesty in what I journal. Take the best and leave the rest. Support anyone I can.

Reach out and socialize daily. Even for a cup of decaf coffee.

Never sit down for hours on end when I'm depressed. Its a snow ball effect and its difficult to break out of that pattern.

Like myself. Every. Day.

September 2013. Diagnosed depression/anxiety. Start Prozac 10mg and slowly increase to 40mg.

October 2013. Lorazepam 0.5mg prescribed for anxiety after complaining about nervous energy

November 2013. prescribed a sleeping pill (name?) for insomnia. took once. ineffective.

January to June 2014. psychiatrist agrees to lower dose to 15 mg due to side effects.

August 2014 first attempt to quit cold turkey Lasted August 1, 2014 until October 1, 2014

November 2014 second attempt to quit cold turkey lasted Novemember 4, 2014 until Jan 13, 2015

January 2015 3rd attempt to quit cold turkey lasted feb 3, 2015 until feb 23, 2015

March 5, 2015 4th attempt to quit cold turkey.

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That sounds like a great plan, Dane.  I know for me, the use of alcohol during withdrawal greatly complicated the picture. It really will be a different experience for us, to not ingest a central nervous system depressant while also giving up an antidepressant.  I think everything on your plan sounds healthy and helpful, and of course I am routing for you!!  My plan is very similar, except that I haven't given up caffeine.  Anxiety and sleep have not been issues for me, so I don't view caffeine as all that disruptive (and I only have two cups of coffee a day).  If I get edgy, anxious, irritable, or have trouble sleeping, I'll join you in the no caffeine plan!

 

In January I did a "Whole 30", which is 30 days without alcohol, sugar, grains, dairy or legumes. No fake or processed foods.  I really haven't gone back to eating much of any of those things, but I'm inspired by your post to get my full commitment back.  I think I'll do another "Whole 30", since it really did make me feel good.  I just have to incorporate lots of starchy vegies and some fruit, because low carb doesn't work for me; it makes me crabby.

 

Anyway, I'm wishing you a good day, and the strength and courage to stick with the plan you've arrived at!

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Dane, you must know that people are routing for your success. Everyone is supporting your goal and wants you to help you to get there, but sometimes support comes in the form of feeling a need to protect. I know I get nervous thinking of your cold cold turkey because I don't want you to hurt or struggle. I know how bad things can get and thinking of anyone being in the place is hard so sometime I read your post and want to yell, Stop!! Don't do this!! Not because I know any better than you, but because it scares me... I guess it reminds me of that scary place and I want to protect you from getting there. But truth be told, I can't see the future, and as possible as it may be that you find yourself in that place, it's just as possible that you won't. Like you said, you have a plan, so maybe your path detours around that place completely. I hope it does. I hope you don't even see an exit sign for that place along your way.

 

But again, know that people's attempts to dissuade you from your chosen route are not meant as condemnation, the intention comes from a good place, a place of wanting you to succeed painlessly. Of wanting to protect you, whether you need it or not :-).

1988-2012: Prozac @ 60mg (with a few stops and starts)

Fall 2012: Returned to 40mg after discontinuing and horrid withdrawal 

Fall 2013: 40mg Fluoxetine, added 150mg Wellbutrin to treat fatigue 

Winter 2014: Attempting to taper both (too fast)

April 2014: 9mg Fluoxetine + 37.5 Wellbutrin 

Summer 2014: 8 mg Fluoxetine + 0 Wellbutrin (way too fast a drop)

Late summer/Early Fall 2014: Debilitating Withdrawal symptoms 

Fall 2014 - Wellbutrin successfully kicked to the curb but…

Oct- Dec 2014: Panicked reinstatement of Fluoxetine ->30mg - held for 5yrs

Jan 2021: taper to 20mg Fluoxetine  then tapering by 1mg every 2-3 months

Fall 2022 - held at 10mg->December 2022: 9mg->Feb 2023: 8mg ->March 2023: brassmonkey slide begins: 7.8mg -> 7.6 -> 7.4->2 week hold (April)->7.2->7mg->6.8->2 week hold->6.6-> 1-month hold ->(June)-6.5->4-week hold-> (July)-6.4 (discontinued brassmonkey slide and slowed taper)-> (Aug)-6.2->(Sept)-6.0->(Oct)-5.9->(Nov)-5.8->(Dec)-5.7->wave!->(Jan)-5.8->(Feb)-6mg and holding.

 

My 2014 withdrawal experience: https://rxisk.org/antidepressant-withdrawal-a-prozac-story/

 

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Addax. thank you. I apologize, I meant to reach out to you earlier and thank you. You gave me a warm welcome and I appreciate your commentary. They keep me thinking and I also find reassurance in your posts.

 

Today is a good day. I'll also posts the bad as I find it necessary to show both sides. For now, sleep is an issue. I keep plugging along, so I'm dealing with it as best I can. I refuse to take anything to help me sleep as I want my brain to rest and the chemistry to start resetting itself. anything I feel that would interrupt the brain chemistry is off limits.

 

glass half full today.

September 2013. Diagnosed depression/anxiety. Start Prozac 10mg and slowly increase to 40mg.

October 2013. Lorazepam 0.5mg prescribed for anxiety after complaining about nervous energy

November 2013. prescribed a sleeping pill (name?) for insomnia. took once. ineffective.

January to June 2014. psychiatrist agrees to lower dose to 15 mg due to side effects.

August 2014 first attempt to quit cold turkey Lasted August 1, 2014 until October 1, 2014

November 2014 second attempt to quit cold turkey lasted Novemember 4, 2014 until Jan 13, 2015

January 2015 3rd attempt to quit cold turkey lasted feb 3, 2015 until feb 23, 2015

March 5, 2015 4th attempt to quit cold turkey.

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dane, I'm impressed you are OK so far going CT. Personally I'm going to take things slower because I can't stand the withdrawal sensation that my brain is somehow the wrong size and shape for my skull. Last time I did this journey, I tried to CT from 5mg, couldn't do it, 2.5mg nope, I think I finally tapered off at 1mg and still felt like a pile of poop. There must be lots of people who can just stop prozac due to the long half-life, but there will always be people who are more sensitive to dose changes.

reason for medication: anorexia nervosa, depression and anxiety

 

lustral for 2-3 years at 150mg, straight switch to prozac

prozac at 60 mg for ~ 6-7 years - initial side effects included hallucinations - yay me. 

attempt to come off prozac failed due to depression returning at 20mg prozac

prozac decreased to 40 mg for ~ 2 years

attempt to come off prozac tapering 40, 35, 30, 25, 20, 15, 10, 5, 2.5, 1 mg per day, two weeks at each dose: first month or so on zero dose fine then triggered into relapse of anorexia nervosa, depression and anxiety

20 mg prozac for ~3 years, attempted 30 or 25 mg to control anxiety but could not tolerate, so used valium.

March 2015, 2 years since complete AN recovery: alternate day dosing of 20mg prozac, felt like crap, switched to 10mg liquid daily, then started gradual taper

August 2015 taper has reached 5.6 mg prozac and taking 40mg omeprazole

December 2015 20 mg omperazole

May 2016 taper has reached 1.8 mg, attempting omeprazole taper to 15 mg

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mods please help delete these extra posts!!

reason for medication: anorexia nervosa, depression and anxiety

 

lustral for 2-3 years at 150mg, straight switch to prozac

prozac at 60 mg for ~ 6-7 years - initial side effects included hallucinations - yay me. 

attempt to come off prozac failed due to depression returning at 20mg prozac

prozac decreased to 40 mg for ~ 2 years

attempt to come off prozac tapering 40, 35, 30, 25, 20, 15, 10, 5, 2.5, 1 mg per day, two weeks at each dose: first month or so on zero dose fine then triggered into relapse of anorexia nervosa, depression and anxiety

20 mg prozac for ~3 years, attempted 30 or 25 mg to control anxiety but could not tolerate, so used valium.

March 2015, 2 years since complete AN recovery: alternate day dosing of 20mg prozac, felt like crap, switched to 10mg liquid daily, then started gradual taper

August 2015 taper has reached 5.6 mg prozac and taking 40mg omeprazole

December 2015 20 mg omperazole

May 2016 taper has reached 1.8 mg, attempting omeprazole taper to 15 mg

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Lol. Moderators, please leave them. SparklyPickle had a glitch. Kinda funny. Brings about smiles.

 

I'm glad the taper is working for you. It's way too early to know if what I am doing is the best plan for me. But I need to try it with this plan in place. I'll follow you to make sure I give you a push now and then when you need it. :)

September 2013. Diagnosed depression/anxiety. Start Prozac 10mg and slowly increase to 40mg.

October 2013. Lorazepam 0.5mg prescribed for anxiety after complaining about nervous energy

November 2013. prescribed a sleeping pill (name?) for insomnia. took once. ineffective.

January to June 2014. psychiatrist agrees to lower dose to 15 mg due to side effects.

August 2014 first attempt to quit cold turkey Lasted August 1, 2014 until October 1, 2014

November 2014 second attempt to quit cold turkey lasted Novemember 4, 2014 until Jan 13, 2015

January 2015 3rd attempt to quit cold turkey lasted feb 3, 2015 until feb 23, 2015

March 5, 2015 4th attempt to quit cold turkey.

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Dane, you go!!! There's a warm pillow next to me on the CT bench left by a guy who went CT and RECOVERED FULLY!

 

Sara, thank you for your post.

 

Just, you are sweet and concerned. I know you don't want Dane to fall off the cliff. My arms are bony, but I'll catch him in my floppy boob flaps. Now there's a visual for you during your WD hallucinations, Dane.

January 2012 - Prescribed 900mg gabapentin and 30mg Norco for lower lumber spinal stenosis pain.

September 2013 - Spinal fusion surgery, 6 levels. Hospital ramped up meds 1500mg gabapentin, 100mg Norco, 80mg Oxycontin, 25mg Fentanyl patch.

January 2014 - Sever nausea daily and with back pain every 4 hours. 2 trips to ER. First endoscopy found ulcer. Treated with Sucralfate and PPI. Second endo in May found no ulcers. Doctors said it was the opiates causing the nausea. CT'd Oxycontin, Fentanyl patch.

July 2014 - Lost 48 lbs. due to not eating because of severe nausea. GP prescribed Prozac 20mg and Ativan 2mg prn. Tried for 4 days, quit. Two week followup GP said keep taking Prozac. 4 days, quit again. Ativan taken rarely prn for anxiety and appetite.

August 2014 - Went to detox. Off opiates. Still nauseous, helmet head, drugged feeling. Doctor CT'd gabapentin. Ended up in ER. Found 2 gallstones. Gabapentin reinstated at 900mg. Tried botched up and down taper to get off Gabapentin. No tapering advice from doctor. Said to just CT again.

September 2014 - Coded on table during gallbladder surgery. Developed liver biloma due to CPR by doctor. Had bile bulb inserted for 2 wks to drain.

October 2014 - Gallbladder removed. Still nauseous, 3am cortisol surging, drugged helmet head, vertigo, breathlessness, whooshing head, heart palps.

November 8th, 2014 - CT'd gabapentin suggested by family and 4 different doctors. Was told no withdrawal is associated with gabapentin. Have been in hell ever since. No windows, just one big tsunami every day with same symptoms for 4 months.

December 26, 2014 - Found SA. At least I know I'm not insane. My family thinks I'm doing this to myself. Akathesia has become unbearable.

March 10, 2015 - In absolute daily hell with no relief. Currently taking magnesium 200mg before bedtime.

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LOL oh my god pug you are a gem ????????

Diagnosed: Pure O Ocd, Severe Anxiety Disorder NOS, PMDD

 

November 2009 - May 2013- CIPRALEX 20mg

C/T off 20mg Cipralex

Went into dark depression (never experienced before med)

September 2013 - March 2014- PROZAC 20mg

Weaned down to 10mg and held

October 1st 2014 C/T off 10mg Prozac

Protracted withdrawal - 8 months of the most horrific suffering imaginable

June 1st 2015 - ZOLOFT 25mg

June 26th 2015 - Dose increase to 50mg of Zoloft (taken at night after dinner). Slowly improving but still have severe OCD/ruminating, intense DP/DR, and brain fog. Just trying to stabilize at this point.

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Pug. There's only one Pug. I'm not sure I could survive laughing any harder if there were two of you chiming in. I'll reserve that seat next to you :)

 

Day 16. I cant wait to stop counting the days. They move so slowly. Ok, enough pity party.

 

Ok day. On the negative side, sleep is not good. I think its been four days since I had a solid block of four or more hours. A little cranky. Tired. I may take Benadryl tonight as I know what happens when I go too many days without some sleep. All the negatives magnify. Lack of sleep make the waves incredibly bigger and resistant. Oh, and this annoying headache in the mornings. Add in a little anxiety and that sums up the negatives today.

 

Put on a pedometer. I'll let you know how that works out. Rule of thumb is 10,000 steps a day. My theory is, if I notice I have only walked a couple thousand and its mid day, I can evaluate if I'm moping around or sitting too much. One of my biggest downfalls is staying in bed late and sitting for hours, unproductive. These two behaviors create a dark gloomy place that I have a hard time pulling myself out of.

 

Its an ok day. Going to the movies later. Cooking a new dinner.

 

my glass is half full, even if I had to add a little water to it today.

September 2013. Diagnosed depression/anxiety. Start Prozac 10mg and slowly increase to 40mg.

October 2013. Lorazepam 0.5mg prescribed for anxiety after complaining about nervous energy

November 2013. prescribed a sleeping pill (name?) for insomnia. took once. ineffective.

January to June 2014. psychiatrist agrees to lower dose to 15 mg due to side effects.

August 2014 first attempt to quit cold turkey Lasted August 1, 2014 until October 1, 2014

November 2014 second attempt to quit cold turkey lasted Novemember 4, 2014 until Jan 13, 2015

January 2015 3rd attempt to quit cold turkey lasted feb 3, 2015 until feb 23, 2015

March 5, 2015 4th attempt to quit cold turkey.

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Hope you get a good night's sleep tonight Dane!  It's hard not to be cranky and negative when you're under-slept.  You sound like you're doing some good self care as you get through each day...cooking a new dinner, going to a movie...and the pedometer's a great idea. Keep adding water to that glass!

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Day 17 CT

 

Having the most bizarre nightmares for the last five nights. Takes a few seconds after they wake me to realize they're not real.

 

Despite sleeping poorly, woke up in a good mood. Had a good early morning and then crashed at about 10. This wave came out of nowhere and it's been two hours. So...I need to get up and out. Pedometer states I haven't walked enough and that's an indicator that I'm being sluggish.

 

Here's hoping I can turn this day around. I can identify what's draghing me down, I just need to figure out how to look at it objectively, accept it for what it is and not let myself start obsessing or blow it into something it's not.

 

At a minimum, at least I have insight.

September 2013. Diagnosed depression/anxiety. Start Prozac 10mg and slowly increase to 40mg.

October 2013. Lorazepam 0.5mg prescribed for anxiety after complaining about nervous energy

November 2013. prescribed a sleeping pill (name?) for insomnia. took once. ineffective.

January to June 2014. psychiatrist agrees to lower dose to 15 mg due to side effects.

August 2014 first attempt to quit cold turkey Lasted August 1, 2014 until October 1, 2014

November 2014 second attempt to quit cold turkey lasted Novemember 4, 2014 until Jan 13, 2015

January 2015 3rd attempt to quit cold turkey lasted feb 3, 2015 until feb 23, 2015

March 5, 2015 4th attempt to quit cold turkey.

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If we added our two pedometers together, we'd be globetrotters. And that's just one day.

January 2012 - Prescribed 900mg gabapentin and 30mg Norco for lower lumber spinal stenosis pain.

September 2013 - Spinal fusion surgery, 6 levels. Hospital ramped up meds 1500mg gabapentin, 100mg Norco, 80mg Oxycontin, 25mg Fentanyl patch.

January 2014 - Sever nausea daily and with back pain every 4 hours. 2 trips to ER. First endoscopy found ulcer. Treated with Sucralfate and PPI. Second endo in May found no ulcers. Doctors said it was the opiates causing the nausea. CT'd Oxycontin, Fentanyl patch.

July 2014 - Lost 48 lbs. due to not eating because of severe nausea. GP prescribed Prozac 20mg and Ativan 2mg prn. Tried for 4 days, quit. Two week followup GP said keep taking Prozac. 4 days, quit again. Ativan taken rarely prn for anxiety and appetite.

August 2014 - Went to detox. Off opiates. Still nauseous, helmet head, drugged feeling. Doctor CT'd gabapentin. Ended up in ER. Found 2 gallstones. Gabapentin reinstated at 900mg. Tried botched up and down taper to get off Gabapentin. No tapering advice from doctor. Said to just CT again.

September 2014 - Coded on table during gallbladder surgery. Developed liver biloma due to CPR by doctor. Had bile bulb inserted for 2 wks to drain.

October 2014 - Gallbladder removed. Still nauseous, 3am cortisol surging, drugged helmet head, vertigo, breathlessness, whooshing head, heart palps.

November 8th, 2014 - CT'd gabapentin suggested by family and 4 different doctors. Was told no withdrawal is associated with gabapentin. Have been in hell ever since. No windows, just one big tsunami every day with same symptoms for 4 months.

December 26, 2014 - Found SA. At least I know I'm not insane. My family thinks I'm doing this to myself. Akathesia has become unbearable.

March 10, 2015 - In absolute daily hell with no relief. Currently taking magnesium 200mg before bedtime.

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Did I tell you my feet are so dirty from pacing that I'm growing an herb garden between my toes? I've mentioned it on a few threads, but it bears repeating. Since you cook, is there any particular herb you'd like me to grow for you?

January 2012 - Prescribed 900mg gabapentin and 30mg Norco for lower lumber spinal stenosis pain.

September 2013 - Spinal fusion surgery, 6 levels. Hospital ramped up meds 1500mg gabapentin, 100mg Norco, 80mg Oxycontin, 25mg Fentanyl patch.

January 2014 - Sever nausea daily and with back pain every 4 hours. 2 trips to ER. First endoscopy found ulcer. Treated with Sucralfate and PPI. Second endo in May found no ulcers. Doctors said it was the opiates causing the nausea. CT'd Oxycontin, Fentanyl patch.

July 2014 - Lost 48 lbs. due to not eating because of severe nausea. GP prescribed Prozac 20mg and Ativan 2mg prn. Tried for 4 days, quit. Two week followup GP said keep taking Prozac. 4 days, quit again. Ativan taken rarely prn for anxiety and appetite.

August 2014 - Went to detox. Off opiates. Still nauseous, helmet head, drugged feeling. Doctor CT'd gabapentin. Ended up in ER. Found 2 gallstones. Gabapentin reinstated at 900mg. Tried botched up and down taper to get off Gabapentin. No tapering advice from doctor. Said to just CT again.

September 2014 - Coded on table during gallbladder surgery. Developed liver biloma due to CPR by doctor. Had bile bulb inserted for 2 wks to drain.

October 2014 - Gallbladder removed. Still nauseous, 3am cortisol surging, drugged helmet head, vertigo, breathlessness, whooshing head, heart palps.

November 8th, 2014 - CT'd gabapentin suggested by family and 4 different doctors. Was told no withdrawal is associated with gabapentin. Have been in hell ever since. No windows, just one big tsunami every day with same symptoms for 4 months.

December 26, 2014 - Found SA. At least I know I'm not insane. My family thinks I'm doing this to myself. Akathesia has become unbearable.

March 10, 2015 - In absolute daily hell with no relief. Currently taking magnesium 200mg before bedtime.

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Hang in there Dane. I think insight is no small thing...

 

Through this process, I've discovered my tendency to ruminate to be the source of most of my suffering. Even if all I do is get up and walk around the block..or do the dishes..or play some Wii..I've found I have the power to change that. When I move more, I feel better and spend less time on destructive thinking.

 

And keep that water coming.

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium, Methyl B. What has helped me most: spending time in nature, qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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Hi Dane! I just read through your whole thread. I'm new here, too, and have little in the way of experience or advice to offer. However, I can give some encouragment. :)

Kudos to you for committing to a serious diet and exercise regimen at this time of major change.
I have a very active job, so 10,000 steps is more of a daily reality than a goal. I cook my own meals and am starting fish oil supplements. I don't drink or smoke.
But I've NEVER found the gumption to succesfully quit caffeine or refined sugar.



 

2007 - 2010 10 mg escitalopram, switched to 20 mg citalopram (sometimes 40 mg, decreased w/o taper)
2011 20 mg citalopram, 150 mg buproprion SR, 10 mg ambien for 3 months

2015

February      20 mg citalopram, 150 mg buproprion SR reduced to 100 mg

March          20 mg citalopram, 75 mg buproprion
April           
20 mg citalopram, 56.25 --> 37.5 mg buproprion
May              
20 mg citalopram, 18.75 mg buproprion

 

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Pug. Id like some rosemary. Here in the Midwest, all the rosemary dies off in the winter. It costs a fortune to buy it in the store. I do find comfort in walking around the house. Feels a bit odd at times, but when its dark out or the weather is not permitting me to be out, I pace when I obsess. It helps me refocus and let it go...or at least it helps me feel a bit better.

 

Free spirit, thank you. Yes, its activity that helps redirect me. I found myself lying in bed this morning starting to spiral. I signed on here, posted, then got up and moved. Much better day afterwards.

 

Welcome carboneK3. Its a wonderful site with oodles of information and caring people. Take the best and leave the rest is what I do. I also find recovery easier when I'm able to support others and share in their journeys.

 

I need to post the bad times as well. I don't want anyone to come across this thread and see a rosy picture of me going cold turkey on Prozac. Not trying to be a downer, but I need to let people know that its not easy this route either. So, today sucked. It got better, but I'm not in the best frame of mind. Working out, being productive and walking did diffuse a potential down spiral that could have left me motionless on the couch all day. Yup, I'm not perfect.

 

Glass wasn't half full today, but it some water in it and I just kept adding.

September 2013. Diagnosed depression/anxiety. Start Prozac 10mg and slowly increase to 40mg.

October 2013. Lorazepam 0.5mg prescribed for anxiety after complaining about nervous energy

November 2013. prescribed a sleeping pill (name?) for insomnia. took once. ineffective.

January to June 2014. psychiatrist agrees to lower dose to 15 mg due to side effects.

August 2014 first attempt to quit cold turkey Lasted August 1, 2014 until October 1, 2014

November 2014 second attempt to quit cold turkey lasted Novemember 4, 2014 until Jan 13, 2015

January 2015 3rd attempt to quit cold turkey lasted feb 3, 2015 until feb 23, 2015

March 5, 2015 4th attempt to quit cold turkey.

Link to comment

Keep truckin, Dane.

January 2012 - Prescribed 900mg gabapentin and 30mg Norco for lower lumber spinal stenosis pain.

September 2013 - Spinal fusion surgery, 6 levels. Hospital ramped up meds 1500mg gabapentin, 100mg Norco, 80mg Oxycontin, 25mg Fentanyl patch.

January 2014 - Sever nausea daily and with back pain every 4 hours. 2 trips to ER. First endoscopy found ulcer. Treated with Sucralfate and PPI. Second endo in May found no ulcers. Doctors said it was the opiates causing the nausea. CT'd Oxycontin, Fentanyl patch.

July 2014 - Lost 48 lbs. due to not eating because of severe nausea. GP prescribed Prozac 20mg and Ativan 2mg prn. Tried for 4 days, quit. Two week followup GP said keep taking Prozac. 4 days, quit again. Ativan taken rarely prn for anxiety and appetite.

August 2014 - Went to detox. Off opiates. Still nauseous, helmet head, drugged feeling. Doctor CT'd gabapentin. Ended up in ER. Found 2 gallstones. Gabapentin reinstated at 900mg. Tried botched up and down taper to get off Gabapentin. No tapering advice from doctor. Said to just CT again.

September 2014 - Coded on table during gallbladder surgery. Developed liver biloma due to CPR by doctor. Had bile bulb inserted for 2 wks to drain.

October 2014 - Gallbladder removed. Still nauseous, 3am cortisol surging, drugged helmet head, vertigo, breathlessness, whooshing head, heart palps.

November 8th, 2014 - CT'd gabapentin suggested by family and 4 different doctors. Was told no withdrawal is associated with gabapentin. Have been in hell ever since. No windows, just one big tsunami every day with same symptoms for 4 months.

December 26, 2014 - Found SA. At least I know I'm not insane. My family thinks I'm doing this to myself. Akathesia has become unbearable.

March 10, 2015 - In absolute daily hell with no relief. Currently taking magnesium 200mg before bedtime.

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Good job Dane22 keep it up! I find the same thing, if I lay in bed or on the couch and obsess it is VERY hard to break free from. Best thing is to force yourself up and going about your regular day. I just did 2 weeks of training for my dream job and it was hands down the hardest thing I've ever done in my life because of how I've been feeling. However when I was done I was in a much better frame of mind than when I started. Something to be said for a sense of accomplishment! Glad you have realized that already and sounds like you are on the right track ????

Diagnosed: Pure O Ocd, Severe Anxiety Disorder NOS, PMDD

 

November 2009 - May 2013- CIPRALEX 20mg

C/T off 20mg Cipralex

Went into dark depression (never experienced before med)

September 2013 - March 2014- PROZAC 20mg

Weaned down to 10mg and held

October 1st 2014 C/T off 10mg Prozac

Protracted withdrawal - 8 months of the most horrific suffering imaginable

June 1st 2015 - ZOLOFT 25mg

June 26th 2015 - Dose increase to 50mg of Zoloft (taken at night after dinner). Slowly improving but still have severe OCD/ruminating, intense DP/DR, and brain fog. Just trying to stabilize at this point.

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