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☼ freespirit: Mirtazapine withdrawal


freespirit

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Wonderful to read your post Free!

 

So glad things are working out so well for you and that you are getting your life back.

 

Hope things continue onwards and upwards for you!

 

Love from Flowers xxx

15 yrs on 20 to 30 mgs CITALOPRAM.  MAY 2014 Increased to 40 mgs per day.SEPT/NOV 2014 tapered in 6 weeks down to 10 mgs as per Dr instructions due to violent nightmares/palpitations.Given Noctamid (lormetazepam) to help with anxiety. On average took 2mg per day for 8 weeks.No taper was advised.DEC 2014 WD severe. Nervous tic in eyes and limbs, muscle pain,fluct  temp, weakness, dep and anxiety, nausea, giddy, unstable when walking. Different Dr suggested taking 20mgs CIT. BROMAZEPAM 3mgs up to 3 x daily for anxiety.DEC 9 2014 Updose CIT to 30mgs. Only taking BROMAZEPAM in emergency.DEC 31 2014 Settling at 30mg CIT - helping with depression. No Brom for 2wks.Found SA.APR 2015 Trying to stabilise on 30mgs CIT.  JAN 2016 Started Cit Taper reducing by 5% per month.  28.5 mgs 
FEB  Taper held bereavement. APR Taper resumed 27mgs . MAY 25.50 mgs .  JUNE 24 mgs .  JULY I stupidly mixed up my BP meds with CIT. Consequently took no CIT for 3 days and doubled my BP meds. Waiting for the fallout....Holding for a while until any chance of repercussions have abated. SEPT taper resumed to  22.5 mgs . OCT 21 mgs .NOV 19.95 mgs DEC crashed. 2017: FEB 3rd updose to 20.5 mgs to try to stabilise.FEB.switched over to 75mgs of Venlafaxine XR for 3 weeks.Too stimulating so switching back to Cit. 12 March 37.5 Ven and 20 Cit. 21 March 18mg Ven 20mg Cit. 4 April 9mg Ven 20mg Cit. Xanax .50mg when needed.  13 April 0 mgs Ven, 20mg Citalopram. Xanax .50 mg per day. 5 May reinstated a small amount of Ven to stabilize  1 mg twice a day. 20 mg Citalopram at night. Xanax .25 mg twice per day.Other Meds: Losartan (BP)Started 1993 at  50 mgs at night.  Seretide (Asthma) Started 1996 at 1 puff twice a day. Jan 2019 Antibiotic Ceclor 500mgs twice a day for bronchitis and  Atrovent 2ml capsules twice a day for asthma. Finished the course of both Jan 17. 

XANAX  Jan 27  - Feb 3 2019 Failed Valium Crossover.   Feb 14 2019  Updosed Xanax by .0625  Feb 17 2019 Decreased Xanax by .0625. Back to .50mg daily.  Update Xanax 28.2.20 tapered to .1250 mg 8am .25 mg midnight. Update Xanax 11.8.21 tapered to .25 mg at night. 

Current Meds 28.2.19: CITALOPRAM  20mg  taken at midnight. VENLAFAXINE  .9 mg twice a day at 8am and 10pm.  XANAX .50 mg split into 4 doses per day. 10am .0625mg / 2pm .1250mg/ 6pm .0625mg / midnight .25mg.Update 10.8.22 .25 mg at night.  LOSARTAN 50 mgs taken at midnight.  SERETIDE 1 puff taken at 8am and 10pm.   7.7.19 VENLAFAXINE UPDATE: Started tapering 10% every 4 weeks. Currently .4 mg twice a day at 8am and 10 pm.  2.9.19 .36 mg x 2. 1.10.19  .32 mg x 2. 26.11.19 .29 mg x2. 26.12.19 .26 mg  x 2. 23.1.20  .23 mg x 2.  20.2.20 .21 mg x2.20.3.20  .19 mg x 2. 21.4.20 .17 mg x 2. 19.5.20 .13 mg x 2.  18.6.20 .11mg  x 2 .18.7.20.10 mg x 2.1.9.20.09 mg x 2. 30.9. 20 .08 mg x 2. 1.11.20 .07 mg x 2.  2.12.20 .06 mg x 2.  8.1.21 .05 mg x 2.  4.2.21 .04 mg x 2. 9.3.21 .03 mgx2.  7.4.21  .02 mg x 2.  9.5.21 .01 mg x 2.  21.6.21 .01 mg x 1.  11.8.21 ZERO!

 

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Thanks so much for coming back and sharing, Free!  You sound like you are doing very, very well and are an inspiration for those of us still on the path.

 

When you are ready to write your success story, I and many others will be excited to read it.

 

Best,

 

Andy

Sertraline 50mg and Clonazapam .375mg from 2000 -- symptoms of dizziness Spring 2012

increased to .5 Clonazapam and 100mg Sertraline -- no improvement

Benzo microtaper from November 2012 to November 2014 (followed benzo sites "taper benzo first")

Started Sertraline taper in December 2014 cut by 25mg to 75mg; 62.5mg 1/1/15 and 50mg on 2/1/15

Held at 50mg through April 5 to use liquid 
Reduced dosage in 10% or less drops from 50mg to 25mg -- at single tablet of 25mg on 10/5/15

Transitioned to all liquid for accuracy while tapering -- Horrible insomnia -- back to 25mg liquid and held until October 1, 2016

10/16 -- 11/18 tapered very slowly to 10.6mg.  No real improvement and never really stable so updosed to 12.5mg (1/2 a pill) for convenience and long hold.

After 8+ months of holding with no noticeable improvement decided to add .4ml of liquid Prozac (about 1.5mg) to see if that improves the situation

Supplements, Magnesium, D3, Omega 3, curcumin, Valerian, 81mg Aspirin, L-Theanine, Vit. C,

 

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Hi Free,

 

So good to hear how you are doing.   It sounds like you are getting stronger and so nice to hear your thoughtful observations about the process.

 

Thanks for coming back to share, it has given me a boost tonight.

 

Hibari

9/2013-4/2014:  After moms death, was prescribed a series of meds for short periods of time that didn't work. Zoloft, Lexapro,  Nortriptyline, Liquid Prozac, Cymbalta. 

1/2014-9/2014. Clonzapam: Given Lamictal, stopped Clonzapam at .125mgs  

1/2015-4 2017 Remeron: 41.25 -0.025mgs

7/2015-11/2018 Lamictal: 200mgs-0.05 mgs Had paradoxical reaction to Lamictal wd, broke my heart to take a benzo but wasn't sleeping. 

3/28/2019 -2/5/ 2021  Clonazapam: 0.625mgs-.00115 Med Free 

July 27th, 2022**Severe Setback due to surgery/ anesthesia. 

9/7/22-10/4/22 Trazadone 50-100mgs for sleep, 10/13/22-11/13/22 Trazadone 1 mg to stabilize

10/4/22-11/20/22 Remeron 7.5mgs (for sleep doesn't work) 11/20/22 7.3 - 12/31/22 6.3 

2023: 1/18/23 6.1 - 6/6/23 3.6  6/16 3.4  6/28 3.0 7/12 2.7  7/28 2.5 8/11 2.2 8/23 2.0  9/5 1.8  9/16 1.6  9/30 1.4  10/13 1.2  10/26 1.0  11/9 0.8  11/22 0.6  12/6 0.4  12/23 0.2.

2024 1/4/24  Remeron/Mirtazapine free 

Additional Support:  Armour Thyroid 75mgs, Magnesium Glycinate 300-500mgs,  L-theanine 

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Yes.  Such wonderful news.  Needed.

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Thanks for coming back with an update Free, you've had a long, rough journey, since 2008, so its wonderful to see you getting your life back.

 

Reading about all the positive changes in your life makes me happy for you, and hopeful for all of us that even when life has been difficult for a while, its always possible for things to turn around. Congratulations on the job, it sounds very rewarding. I miss reading your posts here, but glad you are doing better now you are back out in the world :)

I'm not a doctor.  My comments are not medical advise. These are my opinions based on my own experience and what I've learned. Please discuss your situation with a medical practitioner who has knowledge of tapering and withdrawal...if you are lucky enough to find one.

My Introduction Thread

Full Drug and Withdrawal History

Brief Summary

Several SSRIs for 13 years starting 1997 (for mild to moderate partly situational anxiety) Xanax PRN ~ Various other drugs over the years for side effects

2 month 'taper' off Lexapro 2010

Short acute withdrawal, followed by 2 -3 months of improvement then delayed protracted withdrawal

DX ADHD followed by several years of stimulants and other drugs trying to manage increasing symptoms

Failed reinstatement of Lexapro and trial of Prozac (became suicidal)

May 2013 Found SA, learned about withdrawal, stopped taking drugs...healing begins.

Protracted withdrawal, with a very sensitized nervous system, slowly recovering as time passes

Supplements which have helped: Vitamin C, Magnesium, Taurine

Bad reactions: Many supplements but mostly fish oil and Vitamin D

June 2016 - Started daily juicing, mostly vegetables and lots of greens.

Aug 2016 - Oct 2016 Best window ever, felt almost completely recovered

Oct 2016 -Symptoms returned - bad days and less bad days.

April 2018 - No windows, but significant improvement, it feels like permanent full recovery is close.

VIDEO: Where did the chemical imbalance theory come from?



VIDEO: How are psychiatric diagnoses made?



VIDEO: Why do psychiatric drugs have withdrawal syndromes?



VIDEO: Can psychiatric drugs cause long-lasting negative effects?

VIDEO: Dr. Claire Weekes

 

 

 

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  • Moderator Emeritus

freespirit, hey.

 

i want to congratulate you on all the positives that are occurring for you right now. your post fairly teemed with steadfastness and optimism, and it was a great thing to read. thank you so much for coming back and sharing what is happening. i hope the strength and healing only increases as time elapses. like you, i am dealing with food sensitivity as a prominent issue. histamine foods are also very problematic for me. vicious headaches, digestive upheaval, anxiety, and muscle pain are strong indicators that i have strayed from my very strict diet. it is a welcome thing to hear that despite your continued sensitivity, there are even small improvements there.

 

all the best and hang in there,

 

dave

1996 - .5mg Ativan as needed, 7.5mg Remeron daily2008 - .5mg Xanax, Ativan discontinued, Remeron continued2012 - .5mg Xanax, .25mg Ativan 3x daily, Remeron continued2/2012 - Jumped from Remeron, continued .5mg Xanax .25mg Ativan 3x daily4/2012 - Began rapid taper of .5mg Xanax .25mg Ativan 3x daily6/2012 - Jumped from Xanax and Ativan, voluntary hospitalization followed7/2012 - 2nd voluntary hospitalization, reinstated Remeron, bumped to 30mg, also given risperidone.8/2012 - discontinued risperidone, tried gabapentin, dicontinued gabapentin, Remeron 30mg continued10/2012 to current - tapered Remeron 10% every 4 to 6 weeks (sometimes more time) using liquid compound12/2014 - 2mg Remeron 1/16/2015 - 1.9mg Remeron 8/1/2015 -1.6mg Remeron - 03/1/2016 - 1.5mg Remeron - 1/2/2017 1.3mg - 5/7/2017 1.2mg - 5/13/2017 - syringe size change - 6/8/2017 - 1.1mg - 7/10/2017 - 1mg - 9/1/2017 - 0.9mg - 10/22/2017 - 0.8mg - 11/22/2017 - 0.7mg - 2/2/2018 - 0.6mg - 3/13/2018 - new compound pharmacy - 5/20/2018 - 0.5mg - 8/31/2018 - 0.4mg - 11/16/2018 - 0.3mg - 12/24/2018 - 0.2mg - 4/1/2019 - 0.1mg - 5/1/2019 - .05mg - 0mg achieved 2019-06-15. 🤞

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Free, You are, as always inspirational.  You taught me so much . Much love !   

Ali

Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014

 

                                                  Psych Drug - free since May 2014
.
         

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Hi Flowers..thanks for stopping in....it's nice having good news for a change. Hope your taper will go well.

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium, Methyl B. What has helped me most: spending time in nature, qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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so happy to hear from you,free! I thinkof you often and am so glad to hear how well you're doing; so happy for you.

 

I've worried how you were coping with all the nasty weather you've had there but you seem to be doing fine.

 

I hope things continue to improve for you.

 

take care...xoxo

Hi DS. I think about you too. I know we've all had times where it seems nothing will get better...but I believe in time, it does. Hope you are keeping okay?

We've actually had not a bad winter so far. A number of wet and windy storms and one small dump of snow. Dec was very gray and many people were complaining about it. I've not had as hard a time with the gloomy days this year..at least so far. Yesterday when I was out riding, it felt almost spring-like.

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium, Methyl B. What has helped me most: spending time in nature, qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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Thanks so much for coming back and sharing, Free!  You sound like you are doing very, very well and are an inspiration for those of us still on the path.

 

When you are ready to write your success story, I and many others will be excited to read it.

 

Best,

 

Andy

 

Thanks Andy, I'm glad if my story can somehow help others. When I was in the depths, it helped to hear that people were getting better. At the moment, I'm a bit on overload from having to learn new software, a new tablet, and finding my way around--even with GPS. It's making my brain work in ways it hasn't had to for awhile. Plus the challenge of keeping up with all my self-care, and knowing that when being involved with palliative work, things change all the time...so, a lot of flying by the seat of my pants. I wasn't sure my brain would be up for this, but I'm doing okay..for a 61 year old!

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium, Methyl B. What has helped me most: spending time in nature, qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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Thanks for coming back with an update Free, you've had a long, rough journey, since 2008, so its wonderful to see you getting your life back.

 

Reading about all the positive changes in your life makes me happy for you, and hopeful for all of us that even when life has been difficult for a while, its always possible for things to turn around. Congratulations on the job, it sounds very rewarding. I miss reading your posts here, but glad you are doing better now you are back out in the world :)

Thanks Petu,

 

For some of us, things can be difficult for a very long while. It's tough to keep going and have hope sometimes...I came across this yesterday:

You can only go halfway into the darkest forest. Then you are coming out the other side.

– Chinese Proverb

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium, Methyl B. What has helped me most: spending time in nature, qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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freespirit, hey.

 

i want to congratulate you on all the positives that are occurring for you right now. your post fairly teemed with steadfastness and optimism, and it was a great thing to read. thank you so much for coming back and sharing what is happening. i hope the strength and healing only increases as time elapses. like you, i am dealing with food sensitivity as a prominent issue. histamine foods are also very problematic for me. vicious headaches, digestive upheaval, anxiety, and muscle pain are strong indicators that i have strayed from my very strict diet. it is a welcome thing to hear that despite your continued sensitivity, there are even small improvements there.

 

all the best and hang in there,

 

dave

 

Hi Dave,

Nice to hear from you! Sorry you're still suffering from the histamine issues too. I hope you're doing okay.

 

I had all the symptoms you describe from histamine foods when I first jumped off...it's miserable, to say the least. It's good to be reminded that it's better for me than it used be. I don't feel sorry for myself like I once did about it. I've just accepted that I eat the way I do, because it's what mostly works. Every now and then I push the limits a little and try something I haven't in awhile. Sometimes, it's okay and I don't react..other times, it's more of a problem. I think a lot of factors are at play and not just the food (stress for one). Acupuncture helped a lot with digestion and has allowed me to be not as strict with my diet. I try not to worry about it, in terms of the future...it's not the worst thing to live with, in the larger scheme of life.

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium, Methyl B. What has helped me most: spending time in nature, qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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Yes.  Such wonderful news.  Needed.

Hi Many More Todays...I just checked in on your thread. Sounds like things are challenging for you right now. Sorry to hear that. The holidays can be so difficult in terms of loss. I really went through it last year over Christmas. Just keep on doing the best you can, taking care of yourself, taking one step at a time..even if it feels like a step backwards. You'll come through this too. Hugs to you.

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium, Methyl B. What has helped me most: spending time in nature, qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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Hi Free,

 

So good to hear how you are doing.   It sounds like you are getting stronger and so nice to hear your thoughtful observations about the process.

 

Thanks for coming back to share, it has given me a boost tonight.

 

Hibari

Hi Hibari,

How's your taper coming along?

 

Yes, I want to let people know that eventually (after a very long time!), Remeron can stop being the "crying drug.". Though I have moments of sadness, they feel more like "normal" ones and not drug-induced ones. I feel sad, cry some, and move forward. No more long days of unrelenting sadness and regret. Things change in time..and they will for you too.

 

In general, I'm spending more time in the moment and looking ahead..even though the anniversary of my wife's death is in a couple of weeks. That's on my mind of course, but unlike past years, it's not the only thing.

 

Keep on keeping on...you'll get there too.

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium, Methyl B. What has helped me most: spending time in nature, qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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Ali--I love your spirit. You're inspiring to me!

 

One thing I forgot to mention in my update. About a month ago, my acupuncturist asked me what my intention was for 2016. The first thing that came to mind was "joy". I want my life to be more about joy. Over this month, I've been seeing more and more how some usual patterns of mind bring the opposite of that. To live more joyfully, a lot more letting go is necessary. So each time a worry or resentment come up, I ask myself if there is something I can do about it, or need to do. If not, I ask if I can let it go. Some things take a lot of persistence and many opportunities. There are some things in my life I felt were unforgivable. I guarantee you there are people I wouldn't allow back into my life, but I'm the person suffering from holding onto the past. It's easier for me to think of them as things to let go of, rather than to forgive....forgiveness can be such a loaded word. Letting go=more possibility for joy.

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium, Methyl B. What has helped me most: spending time in nature, qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Hi freespirit,

 

Such a great update. I'm glad to hear you are progressing on your journey, challenging yourself and meeting those challenges.

 

I especially like that you are aiming for Joy in 2016. This is a prospect for us all and one we should never give up on.

 

Your wisdom is always a valuable contribution here

 

Take care

 

D

Please note - I am not a medical practitioner and I do not give medical advice. I offer an opinion based on my own experiences, reading and discussion with others.On Effexor for 2 months at the start of 2005. Had extreme insomnia as an adverse reaction. Changed to mirtazapine. Have been trying to get off since mid 2008 with numerous failures including CTs and slow (but not slow enough tapers)Have slow tapered at 10 per cent or less for years. I have liquid mirtazapine made at a compounding chemist.

Was on 1.6 ml as at 19 March 2014.

Dropped to 1.5 ml 7 June 2014. Dropped to 1.4 in about September.

Dropped to 1.3 on 20 December 2014. Dropped to 1.2 in mid Jan 2015.

Dropped to 1 ml in late Feb 2015. I think my old medication had run out of puff so I tried 1ml when I got the new stuff and it seems to be going ok. Sleep has been good over the last week (as of 13/3/15).

Dropped to 1/2 ml 14/11/15 Fatigue still there as are memory and cognition problems. Sleep is patchy but liveable compared to what it has been in the past.

 

DRUG FREE - as at 1st May 2017

 

>My intro post is here - http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/2250-dalsaan

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Hi freespirit

Just wanted to say I've found reading your journey inspiring.

I love the quote you posted:

 

"Look at every path closely and deliberately. Try it as many times as you think necessary. Then ask yourself alone, one question . . . Does this path have a heart? If it does, the path is good; if it doesn't it is of no use."

 

It's very relevant to my situation at the moment so thank you.

I wish you all the best with everything, and thank you for sharing your experiences.

Keepinghope

2002 - Prescribed fluoxetine 20mg for mild situational depression and anxiety. Over the years also briefly swapped about on citalopram, sertraline and venlafaxine during poop out. 2012 - Cold turkeyed fluoxetine. Within 3 months was suffering from aggression, anxiety, panic attacks and paranoia. GP put me back on tablets as I was 'relapsing'. I didn't know anything about WD then. Jul 15 - Wanted to quit fluoxetine again so tapered off (skipping doses) over 6 weeks under advice of GP. Aug 15 - Last fluoxetine dose end of August 2015. Dec 15 - Had my first real crash after discontinuing. Found this site. Aug-Dec 16 - Signed off work because of a herniated disc & severe sciatica. Prescribed diazepam (took for 6 days and got WD symptoms on stopping; nausea, morning cortisol spikes, anxiety, anger) and codeine which I was on for 4 mths. Can confirm - opiate WD is nasty but nowhere near as bad or prolonged as SSRI WD!
Withdrawal symptoms have included: extreme anger and irritability, lethargy, depression and weepiness, anxiety, stomach upsets, loss of appetite, excessive sweating, muscle and back pain, insomnia, cortisol surges, akathisia, inability to cope with stress.
Things that help: herbal tinctures (rose, lemon balm, chamomile and skullcap), seaweed baths & epsom salt baths, fish oil and magnesium.

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Hi Free,

 

So good to hear how you are doing.   It sounds like you are getting stronger and so nice to hear your thoughtful observations about the process.

 

Thanks for coming back to share, it has given me a boost tonight.

 

Hibari

Hi Hibari,

How's your taper coming along?

 

Yes, I want to let people know that eventually (after a very long time!), Remeron can stop being the "crying drug.". Though I have moments of sadness, they feel more like "normal" ones and not drug-induced ones. I feel sad, cry some, and move forward. No more long days of unrelenting sadness and regret. Things change in time..and they will for you too.

 

In general, I'm spending more time in the moment and looking ahead..even though the anniversary of my wife's death is in a couple of weeks. That's on my mind of course, but unlike past years, it's not the only thing.

 

Keep on keeping on...you'll get there too.

 

My taper is tough right now Free.  I'm at a level with both medications where it's hard to drop any farther right now.   That's why it's so good to know that the "crying drug" will lose it's power with time.   I like hearing that you are more in the moment.   I want to acknowledge the anniversary of your wife's death and I have a feeling she would be and is very proud of you.

9/2013-4/2014:  After moms death, was prescribed a series of meds for short periods of time that didn't work. Zoloft, Lexapro,  Nortriptyline, Liquid Prozac, Cymbalta. 

1/2014-9/2014. Clonzapam: Given Lamictal, stopped Clonzapam at .125mgs  

1/2015-4 2017 Remeron: 41.25 -0.025mgs

7/2015-11/2018 Lamictal: 200mgs-0.05 mgs Had paradoxical reaction to Lamictal wd, broke my heart to take a benzo but wasn't sleeping. 

3/28/2019 -2/5/ 2021  Clonazapam: 0.625mgs-.00115 Med Free 

July 27th, 2022**Severe Setback due to surgery/ anesthesia. 

9/7/22-10/4/22 Trazadone 50-100mgs for sleep, 10/13/22-11/13/22 Trazadone 1 mg to stabilize

10/4/22-11/20/22 Remeron 7.5mgs (for sleep doesn't work) 11/20/22 7.3 - 12/31/22 6.3 

2023: 1/18/23 6.1 - 6/6/23 3.6  6/16 3.4  6/28 3.0 7/12 2.7  7/28 2.5 8/11 2.2 8/23 2.0  9/5 1.8  9/16 1.6  9/30 1.4  10/13 1.2  10/26 1.0  11/9 0.8  11/22 0.6  12/6 0.4  12/23 0.2.

2024 1/4/24  Remeron/Mirtazapine free 

Additional Support:  Armour Thyroid 75mgs, Magnesium Glycinate 300-500mgs,  L-theanine 

Link to comment

Hi freespirit,

 

Such a great update. I'm glad to hear you are progressing on your journey, challenging yourself and meeting those challenges.

 

I especially like that you are aiming for Joy in 2016. This is a prospect for us all and one we should never give up on.

 

Your wisdom is always a valuable contribution here

 

Take care

 

D

 

I appreciate your comments Dalsaan. For a long time, joy wasn't even in my vocabulary. There are times now, where I feel happy for no reason....and gratitude for small things in the moment. Hope you are well.

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium, Methyl B. What has helped me most: spending time in nature, qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

Link to comment

Hi freespirit

Just wanted to say I've found reading your journey inspiring.

I love the quote you posted:

 

"Look at every path closely and deliberately. Try it as many times as you think necessary. Then ask yourself alone, one question . . . Does this path have a heart? If it does, the path is good; if it doesn't it is of no use."

 

It's very relevant to my situation at the moment so thank you.

I wish you all the best with everything, and thank you for sharing your experiences.

Keepinghope

 

Hi Keepinghope...love your name. Thanks for your good wishes. I'm glad to hear that there are some things in my thread that resonated for you. I wish you well with your journey too.

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium, Methyl B. What has helped me most: spending time in nature, qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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My taper is tough right now Free.  I'm at a level with both medications where it's hard to drop any farther right now.   That's why it's so good to know that the "crying drug" will lose it's power with time.   I like hearing that you are more in the moment.   I want to acknowledge the anniversary of your wife's death and I have a feeling she would be and is very proud of you.

 

 

 

I'm sorry things are so difficult right now Hibari. You've done well to come this far...and you can ride through these bumps in the road too. The drugs try to make us believe that whatever hell we're in is permanent, but in reality, everything changes in time. Thank your for acknowledging the upcoming anniversary..and saying that my wife would be proud of me. I believe that too..even though she might have disagreed with my methods, she would be proud of how I've come through this past 4 years I think.

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium, Methyl B. What has helped me most: spending time in nature, qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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I seem to be up and down a lot lately;felt pretty good yesterday then on our way home from the shore someone turned right in front of us at a light and we just missed hitting them..that kinda sent me off the rails and today feel horrible.

 

also,it's my Dad and brother's birthday today; miss them....but we're getting our first bit of snow this winter ,that's nice to see.

 

hope you get through the anniversary OK....take  care.

 

                   hugs,ds

went on Prozac 1994-99,60mg.poopout ct  back on 2001-2002,prozac weekly 2002,not working,Effexor 75 mg.?2003-mar.2004 gaining weight 8wk. taper,wellbutrin 150 mg.mar. -may 2004 ctmedfree til july 2005 back to Prozac gaining weight again,back on wellbutrin jan.2006150-300 mg.bad constipation.also was taking aygestin(hormone)perimenopausal irregular bleeding.back on Prozac around sept,?2006,hysterectomy jan30.2007(adenomyosis)off&on Prozac til 2009,citalopram about 1 mo, April 2010 no effect,Effexor again may -mar, 2011.ct,Prozac aug,-dec, 2011 &sept-nov 2012,paroxetine oct,23 2013-may 4 2014 20 mgs.tapered 6 wks.-failed RI in Oct.2014-in protracted WD.started 10 mgs. Fluoxetine May 25 2021 .Stopped fluoxetine May 2022 at 5 mgs.

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  • 2 months later...

Thought I'd stop in for an update as it's been a couple of months now. I'll start by focusing on some of the more positive aspects. For one, I'm still working and very much enjoying my job. It's turned out to be an ideal combination of working independently, but having colleagues for support. In fact, I've never worked in such a supportive environment. It has its moments of stress of course, but 99% of the job is good and is just what the doctor ordered. I've had to stretch myself in any number of ways, including reaching out for help when needed. I'd become so accustomed to figuring and doing everything for myself and I see this as a very positive and needed step.

 

Though I have some periods of lower motivation, they no longer inhibit me as they did when I was on Remeron. I look back and think, who was that person???? I've been working very hard in the garden this spring, back to longer rides on my bike, getting some more things taken care of around the house, and not procrastinating on work-related stuff.

 

My back is almost normal again. Even after a lot of physical work and exercise, I'm having minimal pain. Still occasionally have joint pain, but then I'm 61 and have significant arthritis. The muscle pain at least for the time being is also very minimal and more often related to exertion.

 

Sleep has been a bit hit and miss over the past couple of months. But I don't get upset about not sleeping as long and often find that nights of less sleep don't affect me that much during the day. I'm waking up sweating, but minus heart palpitations or anxiety. They may be more hormonal, as it's not uncommon for that to happen more in spring and fall. I get at least 6 hours of sleep a night and seem to manage fine on that, with an occasional nap here and there.

 

Over the past couple of months, there have been periods of increased emotional symptoms. I couldn't put that down to any one factor, but likely a combination of things. There was some work stress, when my client load went up very quickly. There was the death anniversary and my wife's birthday. There was finally writing the letters I needed to send to doctors. There have been some stresses with neighbors.

 

But the thing I keep reminding myself is that in spite of some flair-ups, I'm still trucking along. I'm working, exercising, meditating, doing qi gong, seeing friends, keeping up better with house and yard work, and less often believing the nonsense that goes through my mind. There's stress and difficulty, but I'm handling it and not letting it keep me from doing what I need to do. This is in stark contrast to the victim place I was dwelling in before I started tapering.

 

Food sensitivities are still a problem unfortunately. I get very sick of eating the same old thing, and will sometimes try to stretch that. I have no answers to this. I had hope that acupuncture would change that, but it hasn't. Though I've kept up with monthly acupuncture and chiropractic, I'm thinking I need a break from both. It becomes a little too easy to look outside myself for healing. I want to take that back inside and see what I can do with the remaining things that are still problematic, which are mostly around food.

 

I'm still taking the same supplements and believe they are helpful. I started taking a 2nd tart cherry and Vit C daily, as both help reduce the incidence of hives and the C helps reduce the sweats at night. My body seems to be needing less magnesium, so my epsom salts baths are less frequent. With longer, sunnier days, I'll likely cut back a little on my Vit D. I no longer use a SAD light, as even 1 minute a day was too stimulating. Same for caffeine, which had been fine up till a couple of months ago. I drink a cup of decaf coffee in the AM, which for the moment, is okay. Since coffee is one of the few dietary things I really enjoy, I hope it will remain okay.

 

I see there are many new folks on the board now. Wish all of you well...and good wishes for the people I connected with on here earlier. I wish I was writing to say there were no symptoms left. They are there, but not slowing me down for the most part. My capacity to handle things is always improving....and I still trust that one day, I will be seeing all of this in my rear-view mirror.

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium, Methyl B. What has helped me most: spending time in nature, qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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happy to read you're doing well, for the most part...think of you often and miss your words of wisdom.. :)

 

we ended up losing the house and are moving to an apt. in a couple weeks so it's been a pretty stressful time but I'm trying to hang in there the best I can....just will be glad when it's all over and we're settled in.

 

hope you continue to do well.

 

love,ds

went on Prozac 1994-99,60mg.poopout ct  back on 2001-2002,prozac weekly 2002,not working,Effexor 75 mg.?2003-mar.2004 gaining weight 8wk. taper,wellbutrin 150 mg.mar. -may 2004 ctmedfree til july 2005 back to Prozac gaining weight again,back on wellbutrin jan.2006150-300 mg.bad constipation.also was taking aygestin(hormone)perimenopausal irregular bleeding.back on Prozac around sept,?2006,hysterectomy jan30.2007(adenomyosis)off&on Prozac til 2009,citalopram about 1 mo, April 2010 no effect,Effexor again may -mar, 2011.ct,Prozac aug,-dec, 2011 &sept-nov 2012,paroxetine oct,23 2013-may 4 2014 20 mgs.tapered 6 wks.-failed RI in Oct.2014-in protracted WD.started 10 mgs. Fluoxetine May 25 2021 .Stopped fluoxetine May 2022 at 5 mgs.

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Really happy to read your update Free. The details you share on all aspects of your life are very uplifting and generous.

 

I'm really glad your professional life is fulfilling and that you are connected to like minded people.

 

Your reflection on who you were in your med state and how you feel mow offers hope to me.

 

I'm sorry the food stuff is still complicated. I was reading someone's success story here and they mentioned that their stomach/GI area was the last to heal and the most sensitive at this point.

 

You are a really success story to me.

9/2013-4/2014:  After moms death, was prescribed a series of meds for short periods of time that didn't work. Zoloft, Lexapro,  Nortriptyline, Liquid Prozac, Cymbalta. 

1/2014-9/2014. Clonzapam: Given Lamictal, stopped Clonzapam at .125mgs  

1/2015-4 2017 Remeron: 41.25 -0.025mgs

7/2015-11/2018 Lamictal: 200mgs-0.05 mgs Had paradoxical reaction to Lamictal wd, broke my heart to take a benzo but wasn't sleeping. 

3/28/2019 -2/5/ 2021  Clonazapam: 0.625mgs-.00115 Med Free 

July 27th, 2022**Severe Setback due to surgery/ anesthesia. 

9/7/22-10/4/22 Trazadone 50-100mgs for sleep, 10/13/22-11/13/22 Trazadone 1 mg to stabilize

10/4/22-11/20/22 Remeron 7.5mgs (for sleep doesn't work) 11/20/22 7.3 - 12/31/22 6.3 

2023: 1/18/23 6.1 - 6/6/23 3.6  6/16 3.4  6/28 3.0 7/12 2.7  7/28 2.5 8/11 2.2 8/23 2.0  9/5 1.8  9/16 1.6  9/30 1.4  10/13 1.2  10/26 1.0  11/9 0.8  11/22 0.6  12/6 0.4  12/23 0.2.

2024 1/4/24  Remeron/Mirtazapine free 

Additional Support:  Armour Thyroid 75mgs, Magnesium Glycinate 300-500mgs,  L-theanine 

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Ali--I love your spirit. You're inspiring to me!

 

One thing I forgot to mention in my update. About a month ago, my acupuncturist asked me what my intention was for 2016. The first thing that came to mind was "joy". I want my life to be more about joy. Over this month, I've been seeing more and more how some usual patterns of mind bring the opposite of that. To live more joyfully, a lot more letting go is necessary. So each time a worry or resentment come up, I ask myself if there is something I can do about it, or need to do. If not, I ask if I can let it go. Some things take a lot of persistence and many opportunities. There are some things in my life I felt were unforgivable. I guarantee you there are people I wouldn't allow back into my life, but I'm the person suffering from holding onto the past. It's easier for me to think of them as things to let go of, rather than to forgive....forgiveness can be such a loaded word. Letting go=more possibility for joy.

 

Hi Free,

 

I love this piece of writing so much that I did a copy and paste into a Word file so I can save these words to read over and over. It's amazing how putting emotion into words like this can be so helpful. It could almost be poetry. I am going to hold on to these words.

 

Joy

Forgiveness

Loaded Word

Letting Go

More Possibility for Joy.

 

​I'm so pleased to hear you are feeling well and experiencing joy again. Thank you for your inspiration.

2001-2007 Rem 90 mg, xanax 2 mg synthroid 112mcg - 2007-2014 Rem 60 mg xanax 3-4 mg

2015   Feb Rem 45 mg xanax 2 mg, March Rem 30 xanax 2, April  Rem 22.5, May Rem 30  xanax .25x4 hrs, June Rem 26 xanax 2-3, July Rem 22.5 xanax 2, Aug Rem 15 xanax 2, Sept Rem 22 xanax 2, Oct Rem 18 mg xanax .25 mg /4 hrs, Nov Rem 23 mg xanax .5mg, Dec Rem 24 xanax 2 

2016  Jan Rem 20 xanax 2,  Feb Rem 18 mg xanax 1.5, Feb Rem 14 12 mg xanax 1 mg, March Rem 10 9 mg xanax 1-2 mg Rem 7.3 8 xanax 1-2, April Rem 10 12 mg xanax 2 mg, May Rem 11 xanax 1 .75mg Nov Rem 10mg Xanax 2mg 2017 May Rem 10.25 Xanax 1 mg, November Xanax 1mg

 

 

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Really happy to read your update Free. The details you share on all aspects of your life are very uplifting and generous.

 

I'm really glad your professional life is fulfilling and that you are connected to like minded people.

 

Your reflection on who you were in your med state and how you feel mow offers hope to me.

 

I'm sorry the food stuff is still complicated. I was reading someone's success story here and they mentioned that their stomach/GI area was the last to heal and the most sensitive at this point.

 

You are a really success story to me.

 

Thanks Hibari,

 

Your words mean a lot to me. It helps me when something I've been through can be of use to someone else. That's one of the things I miss about not being on the board. It's just me and my own tedious thoughts so much of the time.

 

That's encouraging to hear that someone else found healing in terms of their gut later on. There's always hope.

 

The acupuncturist did some muscle-testing around foods last time and came up with what I believe was a crazy list. Things I know produce symptoms--turkey bacon, avocado, brussel sprouts, broccoli were on the okay list and many foods that are on my staple list I'm supposedly allergic to. I suspect if I was tested at a different time, something entirely different would come up. I've decided she has no interest in learning about WD and how it's affecting my body...so time to ditch that and just see where I am for awhile. The acupuncture itself is helpful, as it has been for you. But the relationship is negatively impacting me. You seem to be more skilled at finding what you need and letting the rest go...I'm still learning on that count.

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium, Methyl B. What has helped me most: spending time in nature, qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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Ali--I love your spirit. You're inspiring to me!

 

One thing I forgot to mention in my update. About a month ago, my acupuncturist asked me what my intention was for 2016. The first thing that came to mind was "joy". I want my life to be more about joy. Over this month, I've been seeing more and more how some usual patterns of mind bring the opposite of that. To live more joyfully, a lot more letting go is necessary. So each time a worry or resentment come up, I ask myself if there is something I can do about it, or need to do. If not, I ask if I can let it go. Some things take a lot of persistence and many opportunities. There are some things in my life I felt were unforgivable. I guarantee you there are people I wouldn't allow back into my life, but I'm the person suffering from holding onto the past. It's easier for me to think of them as things to let go of, rather than to forgive....forgiveness can be such a loaded word. Letting go=more possibility for joy.

 

Hi Free,

 

I love this piece of writing so much that I did a copy and paste into a Word file so I can save these words to read over and over. It's amazing how putting emotion into words like this can be so helpful. It could almost be poetry. I am going to hold on to these words.

 

Joy

Forgiveness

Loaded Word

Letting Go

More Possibility for Joy.

 

​I'm so pleased to hear you are feeling well and experiencing joy again. Thank you for your inspiration.

 

 

That's very kind of you Leahy. I'm still finding my way towards joy. There are fleeting moments of it, especially in the nicer weather, where I can spend more time outdoors. But sometimes, you have to be careful what you ask for! In that, I mean that all the obstacles to what one desires can present themselves. It's heavy slogging at times. It's very much like the last corner of my garden that needs weeding (why oh why did I save the worst for the last?) The weeds are so entrenched that I need the shovel and hoe to begin to loosen their roots. My inner landscape feels the same around the impediments to joy.

 

I finally realized this week that I've been in a bit of a rut. When I was first getting used to my job, it was all I could do to work and maintain everything else that needed to be looked after. Now, I'm more comfortable with work and it's not requiring so much from me..and not nearly as exhausting. It's time to stretch myself again, but not sure exactly that that means yet.

 

A favorite quote by Rumi: “Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.”

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium, Methyl B. What has helped me most: spending time in nature, qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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Sounds good freespirit.  It got me to thinking about working again but I won't........at least until I hit a longer window than the ones I am having now.

 

Of course, I have a nice Rumi book, which I shall begin to read.  My signature is still a bit off too but I am........well I am........feeling stronger some how.  Spring helps.

 

Suicide Scott's anniversary is nearly upon me, 2 years now and I forgot........almost.........his birthday..........so I don't expect it to be too bad.  I should, however contact another lady I met when I tried to do this research study grieving group the fall after.  

 

I've done not much in the selling house and relocation effort other than decide to put it off another year.........until 2018, Spring.  Had to.  Just to quit obsessing.  Now maybe I will get cracking on it.  It also seems I am rebuilding a support system.........hopefully one that will carry me through next winter at least.  The winter of 2016 has been tough......very tough...........but that's okay as long as it's behind me.

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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Really happy to read your update Free. The details you share on all aspects of your life are very uplifting and generous.

 

I'm really glad your professional life is fulfilling and that you are connected to like minded people.

 

Your reflection on who you were in your med state and how you feel mow offers hope to me.

 

I'm sorry the food stuff is still complicated. I was reading someone's success story here and they mentioned that their stomach/GI area was the last to heal and the most sensitive at this point.

 

You are a really success story to me.

 

Thanks Hibari,

 

Your words mean a lot to me. It helps me when something I've been through can be of use to someone else. That's one of the things I miss about not being on the board. It's just me and my own tedious thoughts so much of the time.

 

That's encouraging to hear that someone else found healing in terms of their gut later on. There's always hope.

 

The acupuncturist did some muscle-testing around foods last time and came up with what I believe was a crazy list. Things I know produce symptoms--turkey bacon, avocado, brussel sprouts, broccoli were on the okay list and many foods that are on my staple list I'm supposedly allergic to. I suspect if I was tested at a different time, something entirely different would come up. I've decided she has no interest in learning about WD and how it's affecting my body...so time to ditch that and just see where I am for awhile. The acupuncture itself is helpful, as it has been for you. But the relationship is negatively impacting me. You seem to be more skilled at finding what you need and letting the rest go...I'm still learning on that count.

 

It is a learning process but I too have had to leave holistic practitioners who were not able to get out of the way of their own dogma.  It actual made their treatments less effective because their attitude was so overbearing.  And by overbearing, I mean rigid and righteous.  I know we've gone down this road before but I feel very protective of my SA friend who go for treatments and don't feel listened to.   Sometimes it's just too much to have to hold onto ourselves and manage another person's energy who is supposed to be supporting us.  I believe it's healthy to leave those types of practitioners behind, even if it's for today. 

 

I'm sure you know this but Monica on Beyond Meds has been writing about gut stuff and her experience with supplements.  How it changed for her at different stages in her healing. 

 

H

9/2013-4/2014:  After moms death, was prescribed a series of meds for short periods of time that didn't work. Zoloft, Lexapro,  Nortriptyline, Liquid Prozac, Cymbalta. 

1/2014-9/2014. Clonzapam: Given Lamictal, stopped Clonzapam at .125mgs  

1/2015-4 2017 Remeron: 41.25 -0.025mgs

7/2015-11/2018 Lamictal: 200mgs-0.05 mgs Had paradoxical reaction to Lamictal wd, broke my heart to take a benzo but wasn't sleeping. 

3/28/2019 -2/5/ 2021  Clonazapam: 0.625mgs-.00115 Med Free 

July 27th, 2022**Severe Setback due to surgery/ anesthesia. 

9/7/22-10/4/22 Trazadone 50-100mgs for sleep, 10/13/22-11/13/22 Trazadone 1 mg to stabilize

10/4/22-11/20/22 Remeron 7.5mgs (for sleep doesn't work) 11/20/22 7.3 - 12/31/22 6.3 

2023: 1/18/23 6.1 - 6/6/23 3.6  6/16 3.4  6/28 3.0 7/12 2.7  7/28 2.5 8/11 2.2 8/23 2.0  9/5 1.8  9/16 1.6  9/30 1.4  10/13 1.2  10/26 1.0  11/9 0.8  11/22 0.6  12/6 0.4  12/23 0.2.

2024 1/4/24  Remeron/Mirtazapine free 

Additional Support:  Armour Thyroid 75mgs, Magnesium Glycinate 300-500mgs,  L-theanine 

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Sounds good freespirit.  It got me to thinking about working again but I won't........at least until I hit a longer window than the ones I am having now.

 

Of course, I have a nice Rumi book, which I shall begin to read.  My signature is still a bit off too but I am........well I am........feeling stronger some how.  Spring helps.

 

Suicide Scott's anniversary is nearly upon me, 2 years now and I forgot........almost.........his birthday..........so I don't expect it to be too bad.  I should, however contact another lady I met when I tried to do this research study grieving group the fall after.  

 

I've done not much in the selling house and relocation effort other than decide to put it off another year.........until 2018, Spring.  Had to.  Just to quit obsessing.  Now maybe I will get cracking on it.  It also seems I am rebuilding a support system.........hopefully one that will carry me through next winter at least.  The winter of 2016 has been tough......very tough...........but that's okay as long as it's behind me.

 Hi manymoretodays,

 

Yes, wait on work till the time is right for you. Though I love my job, the stress can be challenging at times. I wouldn't  have been able to do this earlier on in the process.

 

I find anniversary and important dates unpredictable in terms of how I do emotionally. Planning something, however small, seems to help. I hope it's not too difficult a time for you.

 

Spring helps indeed....though not right away for me. I find facing this season and fall challenging...the marking of more time passed I guess. For me, it always makes me want to move from this house, but it's not yet time.

 

That's good you're finding some new supports around you--it's important. I understand about the moving obsession and the need to set it aside for a time. It's what I've done too...now, just trying to get some further things done around the house and yard..so when I'm ready to sell, I won't be scrambling to do a million things first. It's all very daunting I think, even when you want to move and make the change. Everything happens at some kind of pace that it's meant to maybe, but that doesn't always fit for what we want to happen!

 

Take care.

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium, Methyl B. What has helped me most: spending time in nature, qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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Really happy to read your update Free. The details you share on all aspects of your life are very uplifting and generous.

 

I'm really glad your professional life is fulfilling and that you are connected to like minded people.

 

Your reflection on who you were in your med state and how you feel mow offers hope to me.

 

I'm sorry the food stuff is still complicated. I was reading someone's success story here and they mentioned that their stomach/GI area was the last to heal and the most sensitive at this point.

 

You are a really success story to me.

 

Thanks Hibari,

 

Your words mean a lot to me. It helps me when something I've been through can be of use to someone else. That's one of the things I miss about not being on the board. It's just me and my own tedious thoughts so much of the time.

 

That's encouraging to hear that someone else found healing in terms of their gut later on. There's always hope.

 

The acupuncturist did some muscle-testing around foods last time and came up with what I believe was a crazy list. Things I know produce symptoms--turkey bacon, avocado, brussel sprouts, broccoli were on the okay list and many foods that are on my staple list I'm supposedly allergic to. I suspect if I was tested at a different time, something entirely different would come up. I've decided she has no interest in learning about WD and how it's affecting my body...so time to ditch that and just see where I am for awhile. The acupuncture itself is helpful, as it has been for you. But the relationship is negatively impacting me. You seem to be more skilled at finding what you need and letting the rest go...I'm still learning on that count.

 

It is a learning process but I too have had to leave holistic practitioners who were not able to get out of the way of their own dogma.  It actual made their treatments less effective because their attitude was so overbearing.  And by overbearing, I mean rigid and righteous.  I know we've gone down this road before but I feel very protective of my SA friend who go for treatments and don't feel listened to.   Sometimes it's just too much to have to hold onto ourselves and manage another person's energy who is supposed to be supporting us.  I believe it's healthy to leave those types of practitioners behind, even if it's for today. 

 

I'm sure you know this but Monica on Beyond Meds has been writing about gut stuff and her experience with supplements.  How it changed for her at different stages in her healing. 

 

H

 

 

Rigid and righteous are good words to use Hibari...as is "not able to get out of the way of their own dogma." That hits the nail on the head for the acupuncturist, from my point of view anyway. Yes, I need a break from trying to protect myself from her rhetoric. First she was harping on the solution for me being a new relationship. Now, she's convinced I need to "let go" of what the AD have done to me. Of course, eventually that needs to happen. However, letting go when you're still smack dab in the middle of being affected by the drugs doesn't seem very likely. But regardless, that's not anyone's decision to make...it's my process. 

 

I have followed Monica's journey. It seems like for many of us, there's that one last thing that really hangs on. I don't know if the problem is in my gut. My digestion is good, as long as I stay away from or minimize histamine foods...things are miles better than they were a year ago for sure. I'm just very tired of eating from a very small number of foods that are okay. It means things like travel are completely impossible...and it even affects being able to be away for work overnight, where I have to eat out a couple of times.

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium, Methyl B. What has helped me most: spending time in nature, qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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Hi Fresh,

 

It looks like you jumped at 3.75. Did you have severe wd symptoms from that jump?  

 

You developed a problem with histamine after you stopped. My daughter uses Slippery Elm which has helped her tremendously and stays on a low histamine diet. It's hard to eat a small number of foods, avoid eating out and avoiding leftovers.

 

Good healing to you.

 

Leahy

2001-2007 Rem 90 mg, xanax 2 mg synthroid 112mcg - 2007-2014 Rem 60 mg xanax 3-4 mg

2015   Feb Rem 45 mg xanax 2 mg, March Rem 30 xanax 2, April  Rem 22.5, May Rem 30  xanax .25x4 hrs, June Rem 26 xanax 2-3, July Rem 22.5 xanax 2, Aug Rem 15 xanax 2, Sept Rem 22 xanax 2, Oct Rem 18 mg xanax .25 mg /4 hrs, Nov Rem 23 mg xanax .5mg, Dec Rem 24 xanax 2 

2016  Jan Rem 20 xanax 2,  Feb Rem 18 mg xanax 1.5, Feb Rem 14 12 mg xanax 1 mg, March Rem 10 9 mg xanax 1-2 mg Rem 7.3 8 xanax 1-2, April Rem 10 12 mg xanax 2 mg, May Rem 11 xanax 1 .75mg Nov Rem 10mg Xanax 2mg 2017 May Rem 10.25 Xanax 1 mg, November Xanax 1mg

 

 

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Hi Leahy,

 

Yes, I had worse symptoms when I jumped off--which was before I found this site. I didn't realize that was a high dose to jump off of. Most of the symptoms got better or disappeared when I started eating a low histamine diet. Others were helped by IV vitamins and supplements, when I could add them.

 

I have no choice but to eat out when I'm traveling for work. Leftovers frequently pose more of an issue for me than eating out does--especially proteins. I'm reluctant to add more supplements at this point, but I'll keep slippery elm in mind. The thing I wonder is whether doing so much to try and reduce histamine is making things worse over the long haul. I speculate that increased histamine was a response from my body to regulate and reach homeostasis, after so many years of essentially being on an antihistamine. Obviously, I wouldn't stop everything I'm taking now and let my body go haywire; I think it would adversely affect my health. But I do wonder if doing "anti" anything, ends up being a problem in itself.

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium, Methyl B. What has helped me most: spending time in nature, qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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"I have no choice but to eat out when I'm traveling for work. Leftovers frequently pose more of an issue for me than eating out does--especially proteins. I'm reluctant to add more supplements at this point, but I'll keep slippery elm in mind. The thing I wonder is whether doing so much to try and reduce histamine is making things worse over the long haul. I speculate that increased histamine was a response from my body to regulate and reach homeostasis, after so many years of essentially being on an antihistamine. Obviously, I wouldn't stop everything I'm taking now and let my body go haywire; I think it would adversely affect my health. But I do wonder if doing "anti" anything, ends up being a problem in itself."

 

Such a good point you make, Free. I also wonder if "anti" anything ends up being a problem. My daughter having a constant series of severe pain which were preceding by something she ate "out" or "leftovers" She would be unable to eat for weeks - lost too much weght. This was very serious. She finally went to a gastroenterologist who found nothing wrong but sent her off with a script. When she filled the script, her pharmacist called her aside warned her to be "careful" about taking that script. She never took those pills just continued to suffer.

 

It was around then that I just had followed Gia's thread about histamine intolerance. I suggested that perhaps this was a histamine issue. We think the histamine reactions cause internal sores which could not heal because of the reoccurring episodes. It all started to make sense. We used to think 'she's a fussy one' not liking leftovers. I had no idea it was a real issue. Taking slippery elm coats her stomach and intestines which helped her to heal. Of course she is very careful about her diet.

 

IN RETROSPECT, I remember that she took Clariton D for YEARS - routinely on a daily basis. This is why your "anti" point rings true with me. Now, I wonder if all of this intestinal distress was caused by chronic us of an antihistamine. I am quite sure it was. How ridiculous is this? That an innocent young girl would have to suffer from something we perceived as benign.

 

I still have not told her this revelation that I have had. She no longer takes an antihistamine.

2001-2007 Rem 90 mg, xanax 2 mg synthroid 112mcg - 2007-2014 Rem 60 mg xanax 3-4 mg

2015   Feb Rem 45 mg xanax 2 mg, March Rem 30 xanax 2, April  Rem 22.5, May Rem 30  xanax .25x4 hrs, June Rem 26 xanax 2-3, July Rem 22.5 xanax 2, Aug Rem 15 xanax 2, Sept Rem 22 xanax 2, Oct Rem 18 mg xanax .25 mg /4 hrs, Nov Rem 23 mg xanax .5mg, Dec Rem 24 xanax 2 

2016  Jan Rem 20 xanax 2,  Feb Rem 18 mg xanax 1.5, Feb Rem 14 12 mg xanax 1 mg, March Rem 10 9 mg xanax 1-2 mg Rem 7.3 8 xanax 1-2, April Rem 10 12 mg xanax 2 mg, May Rem 11 xanax 1 .75mg Nov Rem 10mg Xanax 2mg 2017 May Rem 10.25 Xanax 1 mg, November Xanax 1mg

 

 

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I am finding your exchange above really important.  I respect how much the two of you research ways to take care of yourselves.

 

I wasn't sure if I was going to run into histamine difficulties when I got of Mirtazapine so I found my way to this women's website.  I signed up for her newsletter just to keep myself informed.

 

I found this recent post of hers interesting as it applies to both her journey through healing and her view on pharmaceutical shaming. 

http://thelowhistaminechef.com/im-not-anti-pharma-im-on-a-medication-vacation/

9/2013-4/2014:  After moms death, was prescribed a series of meds for short periods of time that didn't work. Zoloft, Lexapro,  Nortriptyline, Liquid Prozac, Cymbalta. 

1/2014-9/2014. Clonzapam: Given Lamictal, stopped Clonzapam at .125mgs  

1/2015-4 2017 Remeron: 41.25 -0.025mgs

7/2015-11/2018 Lamictal: 200mgs-0.05 mgs Had paradoxical reaction to Lamictal wd, broke my heart to take a benzo but wasn't sleeping. 

3/28/2019 -2/5/ 2021  Clonazapam: 0.625mgs-.00115 Med Free 

July 27th, 2022**Severe Setback due to surgery/ anesthesia. 

9/7/22-10/4/22 Trazadone 50-100mgs for sleep, 10/13/22-11/13/22 Trazadone 1 mg to stabilize

10/4/22-11/20/22 Remeron 7.5mgs (for sleep doesn't work) 11/20/22 7.3 - 12/31/22 6.3 

2023: 1/18/23 6.1 - 6/6/23 3.6  6/16 3.4  6/28 3.0 7/12 2.7  7/28 2.5 8/11 2.2 8/23 2.0  9/5 1.8  9/16 1.6  9/30 1.4  10/13 1.2  10/26 1.0  11/9 0.8  11/22 0.6  12/6 0.4  12/23 0.2.

2024 1/4/24  Remeron/Mirtazapine free 

Additional Support:  Armour Thyroid 75mgs, Magnesium Glycinate 300-500mgs,  L-theanine 

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