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☼ manymoretodays: off many years of many medications


manymoretodays

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Well.  Brief update.

It is still or should I say I am still very upside down and all around........hopefully just as it should be.  Transitioning?

Yesterday.

Tried a new grief therapist close to home

Tried to stay open to that maybe this will help

A whole hour and she took my history

And I never really got a very good sense of connection

She offered EMDR

Declined

I did that once

It made me feel worse

This is in regard to my present loss, grief

I just wanted support and encouragement

Maybe one more visit

Undecided today

I can text her if I decide no go

Nice person

Too clinical

 

Tomorrow

Will try something all new

Reiki and song/sound

Sounds good

 

And then this, found this:

Matt Licata is the author

During times of transition it can seem as if things are falling apart, which they are. At times, initiation must come by way of dissolution to offer revelation not available when things are clear and held together. It is as if an ancient part of ourselves, a fellow traveler who has accompanied us for so long is no longer permitted to continue the journey by our side. The crumbling of an old dream—my life and the way I was sure it was all going to turn out.

This prior soul-companion might be another person or it can be an ally of the inner landscape—an image, feeling, memory, idea, or lens through which we’d been seeing ourselves and others; any emotionally-significant part of our world that has finished its time here. It must complete the sacred return.

In order to be initiated in this way and to fully participate in the emerging creative cycle, we must slow down, return into the earth and attune to the music, poetry, and high-voltage guidance found in the depths. At times, this art may take form as nothingness, flatness, numbness, and cloudy vision. There may always be an urgency to cut into the dissolution and get to the next phase as quickly as possible. But there is wisdom in the dark which is preparing the vessel for the next illumination.

Allow the old to wash away and grieve the recycling of the passing form. This grief is holy and opens the heart to imagination and revisioning.

 

Kind of a really lengthy update sort of thing afterall

Keep on carrying me Universe and everybody

I know I am going to be okay.  It's just the when do I get to come back to the good old Spirit/soul me?

 

Love, peace, healing/inrecovery, and growth and grief,

manymoretodays

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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.......and oh hey........I got a printout of all my past drugs/medications from Costco awhile back.  2008 on.   So that's helpful to me.......to see and remember.

And then to see how far I've come.

I have come a a long way.

I might just do some more DBT myself.  I've lost a lot of my discipline in the past couple of months.

Focus on diet a bit more.  Housekeeping.

Hopefully go see Mum.  As a trip away is always healing for me.  As are relationships........I can work more on mine with SUN and Mum, and then just acquaintances.

Sooo.......not so bad.

Canceled Reiki/song/sound thing.  Maybe later.  I need to get comfy here at home again.

Another beautiful medal from AA too!!!  Two years and plus.

A day at a time.  Easy does it.

 

I noticed someone mentioned recent meteorological changes.  I've been feeling those too.  Always do.  Something unexpected on my horizon soon.  Can't wait.....

 

Love, peace, healing/inrecovery, growth and change,

mmt

Edited by manymoretodays

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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sorry for your loss,mmt.

I hope it gets easier as you go forward.

I've probably been living with grief for most of my life when I think about it.

sending big hugs your way and wishes for happier days ahead.

love,ds

xx

went on Prozac 1994-99,60mg.poopout ct  back on 2001-2002,prozac weekly 2002,not working,Effexor 75 mg.?2003-mar.2004 gaining weight 8wk. taper,wellbutrin 150 mg.mar. -may 2004 ctmedfree til july 2005 back to Prozac gaining weight again,back on wellbutrin jan.2006150-300 mg.bad constipation.also was taking aygestin(hormone)perimenopausal irregular bleeding.back on Prozac around sept,?2006,hysterectomy jan30.2007(adenomyosis)off&on Prozac til 2009,citalopram about 1 mo, April 2010 no effect,Effexor again may -mar, 2011.ct,Prozac aug,-dec, 2011 &sept-nov 2012,paroxetine oct,23 2013-may 4 2014 20 mgs.tapered 6 wks.-failed RI in Oct.2014-in protracted WD.started 10 mgs. Fluoxetine May 25 2021 .Stopped fluoxetine May 2022 at 5 mgs.

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  • Moderator Emeritus

(((((  ))))))'s  Today not so bad.  I just get so scattered when I do online first thing for several hours.  Messy and scattered house yard and mind.  Not going to get too lost in my head today.

I need to attend to self.

Thank you Dire.  I will get back to you soon.  Forgive me......I am remiss.

neighbor kids a mowing and I am a going up the canyon after a long bath.........B)  And a blender full of spinach!

 

Love, peace, healing/inrecovery, growth, and grief, and woohoo we all get another day!  Make it a good one.

manymoretodays

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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  • Moderator

Congratulations of the two years C&S, that's a big milestone.

 

((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))

 

Brass

20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013.

Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks.  The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better.

Final Dose 0.016mg.     Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017

 

"It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general."  Stephen Hawking

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Thinking of you MMT,

 

I love reading your messages of encouragement to others, and you are so supportive to everyone here.

 

Hang in there friend, gaze at those desert skies, listen to the gentle desert breeze, and smell the wild sage brush.

 

The pain of your loss will leave you when you're ready.

 

Hugs,

JC xx

Dose History: 19 Feb 2014 - Escitalopram 10mg daily June 2015 - Started taper, 5mg every other day July 2015 - 5mg every 2 days August 2015 - 5mg every 3 days September 2015 - 5mg every 4 days Sept 14th - Completed tapering, but at 7 weeks "drug free" I suffered serious WD symptoms as a consequence of "incorrect" tapering. Nov 25 2015 - Re-instated Cipralex @ 2.5mg daily. WD symptoms faded. Held at this dose and experienced "windows and waves". 12 Oct 2017 Reduced dose to 1.25mg. 13 Mar 2018 Reduced dose to 0.625mg (approx.). 16 April 2018 0mg. Windows and waves triggered by stress (IBS/reflux, headaches, sinus issues) Aug 2019 Mirena coil fitted 6 Jan 2020 MAJOR Wave hit 19 months following last dose (protracted WD).  Symptoms listed below Mar 2020 Mirena coil removal.

Therapy: Nov 15th 2016 Re-started therapy Jan 19th 2017 Started CBT Dec 2017 Started listening to Hypnotherapy CD (self-esteem). Nov 2019 Started couples therapy.

Supplements: "Bioglan" Biotic Balance Ultimate Flora 10 billion CFU, live Bacteria, Probiotic, suitable for Vegetarians, with Lactobacillus Acidophilus, Lactobacillus Rhamnosus, Bifidobacterium Longum"Pukka" Vitalise a unique blend of 30 energising botanicals.

Diet: 16 April 2018 Detox cleanse / anti-candida for 90 days. Jan 2020 Started "small plate" diet (i.e child size portions).

Exercise: Stretching, Yoga, Pilates, Spinning, Elliptical/upper body workout, walking.

Medical Test Results: 4 Jan 2017 Homeopathic Treatment starts 24 Feb 2017 Started weight loss program 24 Mar 2017 Naturopathic Treatment + anti-Candida diet started due to suspected Candida Related Complex (CRC). DETOXED for 7 weeks to "re-set" gut. April 2017 "Genova Diagnostics" Comprehensive Stool Analysis NEGATIVE; Full Blood Count (Normal) / Blood Cholesterol: 5.6 (Borderline) / Blood Sugar (Normal) / 28 Jun 2017 FSH 8.2 / 14 Nov 2017 FSH 17.7 Dec 2017 Blood Cholesterol: 3.9 (Normal) / Kidney Function (Normal) / Blood Sugar (Normal). December 2017 "Genova Diagnostics" Food panel allergy (bloodwork) analysis - a few "VERY LOW/VL" allergens; Mar 2018 "Genova Diagnostics" SIBO urine analysis: High Level of Yeast/fungal markers found in small intestine but NO SIBO.  April 2018 Thyroid (Normal) / Full Blood Count (Normal) / FSH (Normal). 16 April 2018 Started anti-Candida diet - 3 month protocol.   25 March 2020 All test results "Normal". CRP" 5 mg/L (normal range to 0-5 mg/L).

Symptoms:  Flu-like symptoms, anxiety, anhedonia, sinus headaches right-side (severe), IBS issues/reflux (severe)**, tinnitus, fatigue, inner tremor, nausea, chills/hot flushes, pounding heart, muscular issues including stiff left hip flexor, intense anger, PSSD (ongoing).  **Histhamine intolerance (suspected).

Major Life Events: 

Re-located to UK from Canada: Jan 2016

My father died: 5:05pm, Monday 5 Feb 2018 Last Lexapro dose: 16 April 2018 (its now been over a year since I quit ADs)  Moved house: Friday 23rd February 2018  "Divorced" toxic Mother: Monday 26 March 2018 Starting working again: 19 November 2018  Diagnosed with: 5th August 2021 PTSD/C-PTSD Diagnosed with: March 2022 Interstitial Cystitis (IC)/Painful bladder syndrome

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Thank you.  And congrats on your "sun sign" Jungle.

.......I can hit several different ? "biomes" close to home. 

I have to take care of many, many living duties before I literally road travel.  Primarily....... my car situation.  :blink:B)

Among other responsibilities.

 

Meanwhile.......angel Merlene is on hover status(she's my dear friend closeby), and I AM in the right place for healing. 

Neighbors are great, and may I learn many new skills while continuing to living cheaply.

Sun(son) seems to stay safe...... and for that I am thankful as well.

 

Love, peace, healing/recovery, and growth

 

 

Edited by manymoretodays

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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  • Moderator Emeritus
On 6/1/2018 at 1:38 PM, Junglechicken said:

The pain of your loss will leave you when you're ready.

 

It's lightening up a bit anyway.......one month out.   The usual guilt at that of course.  Yet I'm smiling and being/feeling more like myself.  Grief hurts in the gut and the heart I've found.

And I'm finding the usual extraordinary synchronicities in all kinds of things and people.  Good ones.

If you just let them in.........other's can be great at understanding.

Looks like Mum is possibly traveling herself!!!!  Well, with my sister and hubs to a wedding.  So........I'm okay keeping my adventures more local for the time being.  I definitely need to get some A/C going in Seymour Subaru though, auto/car.  It's gotten comfortably hot now.

 

Just a peep.

Love, peace, healing/inrecovery, and growth,

mmt

And OOOOMMMMM plus my gutteral Tarzan yell.  Richard C. Miller doing his "Healing in Wholeness" I shall give a 5 star rating to!  He's at the Trauma Summit, days of excellent presentations from the best and just perfect for my morning today.  https://www.soundstrue.com/mycourse/oce/healing-trauma-summit/live/?utm_source=bronto&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=C180606-HTS-Pa

I'm assuming one can still sign on for free listening within 24 hours of each broadcast or pay a smidgen(actually.......it's pretty expensive.......U.S. $297.00 I think) and have and hold the online library of it.

Or try this one:  https://www.soundstrue.com/store/healing-trauma-summit/free-access-c?hatid=102e5b7bf735ab4baad694b49a5d99&partner=2938

It continues through next week!

Edited by manymoretodays
update

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Wrote this one yesterday.

Today busy and out and about.

 

God Bless the warm line.

 

(U.S.A. only..........some are nationwide scroll down and look for the ones in red if you don't see one in your state, you have to go to the second listing to see the ones in red)

www.warmline.org/

And here's a peer talking about her misgivings and then her positive experience with using a warm line:

https://www.madinamerica.com/2014/06/warm-line-expect-call-one/https://www.madinamerica.com/2014/06/warm-line-expect-call-one/

My own experiences overall with them I will rate very good to excellent!

 

Mornings have now become most difficult

Morning dread to sheer emotional pain due to loss

Sleep is good with whole 6 hour stretches

The exhaustion of grief

I get out each and every day

I give thanks

I write

I talk to him

 

I breathe, I rock, I cry, I give myself some solid hugs......

And then........today........I called the warm line again

 

On to more of Sounds True and I'll try some EFT(that's the ongoing presentation right now)

Perhaps I'll consider the EMDR with the new grief therapist I saw once

I see my usual therapist next Monday

Oh, this is trauma.......pure and simple

It lets up in a little while......I can patiently wait

 

I AM resilient

I Love

I so miss my friend......still

 

So little to give to others while my own emotional reserves are so tapped out........this.....is.......difficult

However, it is what it is

 

Love, peace, healing/inrecovery, and growth,

manymoretodays

 

 

 

 

Edited by manymoretodays
update

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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And today.

Just a reminder

June 21st is summer solstice!!!

And that's only 8 days away

So.......that means........that......

For all of us typical housewive's.......NOT me yet I like to live in de-lusion on this

8 days to spiff our nests up to par......

 

Really I am joking

Good thing I usually Spring clean before Christmas

 

B)  A weird post......yet the thought occurred to me today

So......I thought I would share it

My nest really needs some work right now

 

Love, peace, healing, and growth,

mmt

Edited by manymoretodays

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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  • Mentor

Happy solstice in advance... 

  • Prozac | late 2004-mid-2005 | CT WD in a couple months, mostly emotional
  • Sertraline 50-100mg | 11/2011-3/2014, 10/2014-3/2017
  • Sertraline fast taper March 2017, 4 weeks, OFF sertraline April 1, 2017
  • Quit alcohol May 20, 2017
  • Lifestyle changes: AA, kundalini yoga

 

"If you've seen a monster, even if it's horrible, that's evidence of divinity." – Damien Echols

 

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Oh you too FGW.

 

I'm still up as I got this great new book I have to browse now........sheesh.

And what are you doing up so late??!!!  Sometimes it's nice.  You don't have to explain or answer.B)  I get it.

 

I've got time for a nap however manana, after driving(my new little PT job....."van driver")........it's still kind of orientation, getting to know the stops and such.....getting comfortable at it(they are wonderfully supportive)............ and before meeting with my wonderfully supportive sponsor.......

 

A good day today.  Going for 2 in a row!!

 

I did find an outdoor Yoga thing solstice day or day after.......and I hope I'm up for that adventure.

Still searching for an Inipi.  I did find one on the 3rd Saturday of every month and may partake this month.......

 

A day at a time.  Expectations are inversely related to serenity.  I hope I got that right.

 

It is what it is.  Oh so hoping the tides are shifting now......

 

Love, peace, healing, and growth,

mmt

Edited by manymoretodays

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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" Expectations are inversely related to serenity."

 

I'm stealing that, with credit of course.

20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013.

Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks.  The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better.

Final Dose 0.016mg.     Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017

 

"It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general."  Stephen Hawking

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Where's the "like" button! 😸

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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Hi MMT! Just saying hi and seeing how you are doing? I love the expectations quote. It is one of my favorites!

2001- Klonopin 0.125 mg.  2011- increase to 1 mg.  2018- increase to 1.5 mg 

2010- Trials of SSRI's, several.

2011- Saphris 5 mg. CT. 6/2017- retry Saphris 5 mg sublingual, begin taper August 2020 10% taper with scale, and final taper liquid sublingual, August 2019- taper complete!

2011- Geodon 20 mg. Begin taper Sept 2019. 10% liquid taper. 2020: December-5 mg. 2021: Jan-4.5mg. (held Feb.for vacation). March-4mg. Apr-3.6mg. May-3.2mg. June-2.8mg. (Held July for vacation). Aug-2.4mg. Sept.- 2.2mg. Oct. 2mg. Dec 2022 - Taper complete!

2011- Gabapentin 300 mg to present- 2020. Increase 2023 to 400mg.

2014- Vyvanse 20 mg, 2020- Vyvanse 5 mg. Increase August 2022 20mg

2016- Lithium 300 mg, June 2016 - FT.

2017- Cogentin 0.5 mg. June-August 2019- off Cogentin.

2021 - Hydroxyzine 30mg. Holding.

Omeprazole 20 mg and holding, Omega 3's/fish oil, Magnesium

 

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  • Moderator Emeritus
On 6/14/2018 at 1:53 AM, manymoretodays said:

Expectations are inversely related to serenity.

 

This one ^ got a test for sure today.  My morning was completely thrown........as to how I thought today would go.  Sometimes that happens.

 

I've found that happening a lot lately.  Principles that I "thought" I WAS living get thrown to the test.  I believe it's for a reason really.......this season of growth and building strength and courage for whatever comes next.

 

No need to quote me brassmonkey on this one.  It's a Universal thing.......no idea from who or whence it came.  Thank you DMV and Alto too........ for stopping by.  I'm doing okay DMV, all things considered.  Getting back to "well".  And "well enough".........I've just been a bit thrown is all.

 

Maybe it's too many things to choose from again.  I've prioritized though. 

I'm doing a little paid job soon.........driving a "van" between sober living houses here and their IOP(intensive outpatient treatment).  It's slow now and so I've just been doing some of the drives with another "staff person" to get familiar with the route and the houses locations.  I'm hoping just to do it paid for one short morning a week and then one longer morning.  And then maybe some fill ins for the other drivers.   

 

I want to stay open/free enough so can I do a bit of travel later.......maybe in the fall.  Not sure how that will go.  I've got a few other peer type commitments too now.  And just the householding/homemaking has been a challenge.  I need to get up to par with all that.......including my car situation.  I have to get the A/C going soon in the drivable one and give it a good clean.......as I drive others around a fair amount on my own as well.  And I deserve comfort as well.  It's hot in the mid days now. 

 

So........just working hard at getting back some good working routines for myself.  In the way of self care.  And not allowing too, too much monastery time.  For me, if I allow too much of monastery time it becomes isolation and then I get stuck in my head too, too much.  None the less.........I am frustrated, as I'm not getting much done at home right now.....in terms of general organization and how things need to be around here.  Trying to be patient with myself.

 

I did a weird/I should say "new" thing on Thursday.  My sponsor at AA actually suggested this place........so I went in and had my cards done........or an oracle reading.......something like that.  I was feeling really receptive too........as I was sleep deprived that day.  I had stayed up online and then reading a new book the night before.  Well, it was great.......the reading........gave me lot's to go on.........as far as understanding and comfort and things to focus on. 

 

And I'll leave all you folks with this........hot off the press from beyondmeds.com.  Kind of like a sister site or something for me.  ..........and yes, I need to pay special heed to getting my movement in.......still off as far as the "regular" swims/saunas, walk/runs, and yoga.   It's been awhile.  I'm a bit numb from time to time after the break up......... followed by Cancer diagnosis of friend(lovely fellow I broke up with), and then his death.  Kind of a grief trauma reaction.  It is what it is and it is getting better.  I just thought he'd always be around......on the periphery, cheering and encouraging me on.  I need to do that for myself now.......growth again!   Best thing.........doing this without any belief that I am mentally ill somehow....... in how it has affected me.  I mean we come out of this whole psychiatric thing(or I did)........so naive again, like teenagers or something........trying to fill in the maturity gaps that we missed going through.

 

It's all worth it though in my own humble opinion.  This Life thing.

 

So here's the link:

https://beyondmeds.com/2018/06/16/this-weeks-ecstatic/

If you open the link.......you'll see that you can do this from your bed, chair, virtually anywhere.  Try it!  B)

And yes........that stuff really, really makes a huge difference for me and staying on the "well" side.  It's been an upside down couple of months as I have said above in posts.

 

Love, peace, healing, and growth,

mmt

 

Thank you for the space.  I needed that......... writing time on here.  It always helps.

Also note to self:  put list of W/D symptoms that have occurred in the last couple of months next time I post.  I've had some.

........and........drumroll........Happy Father's Day to those whom that applies.......it's tomorrow.  Must send an e-mail at least to my ex hubs and Sun's(son) Dad.

Edited by manymoretodays
elaboration, punctuation, spaces and ..........

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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  • 2 weeks later...
  • Moderator Emeritus
On 6/14/2018 at 11:33 AM, brassmonkey said:

" Expectations are inversely related to serenity."

 

Ah.......I found it in the Big Book of AA.........although it was stated in reverse at the end of one of the stories.

 

Today's whatcha whatever you want to call it:

 

"Lower your expectations and your performance will rise".........it must come from someone, somewhere.......  So that's what I'm going to do for myself now.

 

I've waylaid or "quit" on the paid work for now..........it's just too much responsibility for this fragile one right now.  On the positive side though.......they get it, my why.   Maybe it will be there still or maybe it won't when I'm ready or back or whatever.

 

And my why I suppose relates to that morning dread that now comes over me.  And that I could not pull off 2 in a row more decent, reliable mornings for just myself before driving for them this week.  Just not great.......still.   Oh........my dear neighbor.......another angel in disguise as "the president of the relief society"........and oh........I am not Mormon..........is kind of sponsoring me through some of this now.  I do have and hold dear without resentment my friends in that religion.  It's the sometimes cultural side of it that is difficult when one is a newcomer to this area.  The rest is all good.  Anyway.......she'll be my morning touch point person for a bit.  God Bless her. 

 

My AA sponsor is still there, here.  She's at more of a distance geographically speaking, and so busy with all her present "action".  So we speak and meet as I can handle for now.  It's me.  Perceptions gone astray.  I did get to 2 back to almost back meetings on Saturday.  Had a meal with a friend from there in the interim period.  So.......that's good.

 

That loneliness that just takes your breath away hovers frequently.  My old standby of "shame and guilt" feelings don't have a chance with the other mmt being ever vigilant in dowsing their flames.

 

Grief.  Trauma.  Doable.

 

I've got to commit to making the rounds here in the evening instead of morning as well.  Get disciplined in this regard for all our sakes.  B)

 

Monday, monday.........let's make it a good day and week!

and tap tap tap........amazing......... the what I like to call the "tapping" technique......

 

Reporting live from Paradise somewhere in the SW portion of the good old U.S. of A.

 

Love, peace, healing/inrecovery, and growth.......

 

manymoretodays..........yes indeedy there are!!

Edited by manymoretodays
spelling

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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  • 3 weeks later...
  • Moderator Emeritus

Woah.  When it rains it pours I guess.

My father out law took a turn for the worse.  Hospital found first cancer in his brain, and now apparently riddled throughout.  Hoping for a move to hospice care now.  He's fading fast.

 

I'm a wet noodle.  In terms of having much to offer here for a bit.  Doing okay.  All things considered.

I hate you Cancer!!!!

 

Love, peace, healing, and growth,

manymoretodays

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

Link to comment
  • Mentor

Saw this and previous posts only today, @manymoretodays. So sorry to hear about your father-"outlaw." You've had too much cancer in your loved ones' lives. Know you always have support here. I'll say a prayer for you.

 

Love "Expectations are inversely related to serenity." I have a sponsor now although she hasn't been too in my life yet; we are meeting for the first "real" session on Friday. I am reading up to page 164 of the Big Book too.

 

 

 @manymoretodays

  • Prozac | late 2004-mid-2005 | CT WD in a couple months, mostly emotional
  • Sertraline 50-100mg | 11/2011-3/2014, 10/2014-3/2017
  • Sertraline fast taper March 2017, 4 weeks, OFF sertraline April 1, 2017
  • Quit alcohol May 20, 2017
  • Lifestyle changes: AA, kundalini yoga

 

"If you've seen a monster, even if it's horrible, that's evidence of divinity." – Damien Echols

 

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  • Moderator

((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))

20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013.

Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks.  The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better.

Final Dose 0.016mg.     Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017

 

"It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general."  Stephen Hawking

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Im sorry manymoretodays...that is so hard!  Thinking about you!!!!💜

-Nardil 1976 < year, stopped. React to AD's. Klonopin .5BID 1990, 2.5mg til 2016

-Klonopin doubled Jan '16. Taper to 2.25mg May to Nov '16. Bad react to Lexapro, stop. React to Prevacid too, taper off. 

-November '16 Tapered .25mg Klonopin in hospital. Jan '17 started Viibryd, 20mg from Feb to June '17,     

-20mg to 10mg Viibryd from 3/25 to 6/10 2017, 12/15 10% Viibryd taper...back up next day

-Clonazepam 2mg to 1.85mg 4/14 '17 to end November; taper to 1mg Clonazepam in hospital 9/1 tp 9/14 '17

-Feb '18 Amiloride .25mg  5/18 off Amiloride d/t react. Clonaz compounded  

-4/27 '18 Viibryd 9.5mg, 6/11 9.0 mg, 1/27 '19 Viibryd 8.75mg, ; Clonazepam .2mg 530pm and .7mg 1130pm, Premarin .3mg 830PM CARAFATE QID 2/27/19 to 3/5/19

-July 6'19 1/2 10mg Claritin 230pm, stopped it about July 18, started Oct 11 '19, 

-7/27 Viibryd 8.5, 8/29 8.25, 10/24 8.0, 12/19 7.75, Feb '20 7.50, 3/20 7.25, 5/20 7.0, 6/20 6.75, 7/20 6.5, 8/20 6.25, 10/2 20 6.0, 11/25'20 5.75, 1/9/21 5.5, 2/23 5.25

-1015 AM Viibryd, vit D 4,000IU 130, 415 Clonazepam .2mg, 815 Premarin .3mg, 1015 Clonaz .7mg,

  1115 3t fish oil+D 1145 Castor Oil 650mg(4) 1230 Carafate 1/2GM,Methylated B Vit  1/week,Reacted Mag prn

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  • 4 weeks later...

So much loss in your life recently mmt. How are you doing? What are you up to? Sending love ❤️

2004: Clonazepam and Celexa. 2005 - 2006: Effexor, then increased to high dose, then switched to Valproate and Seroquel. 2007: Wellbutrin + Strattera + Celexa. 2007 - 2008: Wellbutrin + Adderall + Paxil. 2008 - 2012: Wellbutrin + occasional SSRIs when I had worsened "depression", which happened around 4 times, usually after CT of WB. 2012 - 2014: WB + Sertraline, then WB + Pristiq (awful W/D) then WB + rTMS, then ketamine. 2014 - 2016: Wellbutrin 200 mg + Abilify 4 mg + Adderall 20-40 mg + Cipralex 20 mg. Oct 2016: "Tapered" Cipralex, felt outrageously anxious, irritable. Dec 2016: "Tapered" Adderall, then felt depressed, hopeless, fatigued.  Feb 6 2017: reinstated 20 mg Adderall. Mar 2017: switched to Vyvanse, upped to 30 mg. May - Aug 2017: "Tapered" Vyvanse + Abilify to zero. Oct 25, 2017: Wellbutrin from 200 to 100 mg. Sep 10, 2018:  Wellbutrin from 90 to 60 mg. Oct 29, 2018: WB from 60 to 50 mg. Dec 19, 2018: WB from 50 to 45 mg. Apr 15, 2019: WB 41 mg. May 14, 2019: WB 37 mg. Jun 8, 2019: WB 33 mg. Jul 22: WB 30 mg, then down by around 10% per month. Aug 2020: 0

 

Working hard to take my life back. Anything I say here is as a friend or peer supporter; it is not medical advice.

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  • Moderator Emeritus

And a......oh, man........longest post ever........it helped though......yikes........more for me I think and my history/progress report here

I'm a doing okie dokie.  More or less.  Less can sometimes be more as I have come to understand.

And thank yous in order.  For love, support, understanding, and all that really good and humane stuff that comes.......... right through the world wide web.  And that is just present......in all of us.  Amazing world.

 

My father out law wound up with metastatic melanoma, with notable masses in 2 places.  Brain and lungs.  He's hanging in, for a bit longer anyway........ and actually some improvement with some stepped up care.  He only recently got settled into assisted living, and is out of the hospital and now settling back in at the same facility,  with  stepped up care. (and oh geeze.....editing, as I used the term stepped up care 3 or 4 times, next paragraph....bugs me, I'll leave it though.......no aggressive cancer care for grandpa at 90.....thankfully......all the testing in the hospital was fairly invasive.  Now he gets physical therapy and a bit more caring, compassion......hopefully some decent hospice care soon.....when insurance deems it fit I suppose)

  

This one........hard of course, outlaw family IS part of my chosen family........harder for his bio family and my SUN(son).  He is close to Grandpa.......even more so since living in the bigger city again.  Grandpa's assisted living........to stepped up care now, is within walking distance of dear Sun's apartment.  So SUN visits frequently.  He, in fact noticed the slurred speech onset(new symptom) and reported it to staff.   Which led to the hospital and back.  Grandpa has had something like Guillian Barre' for years now but never slurred speech.    Anyhoo.......outlaw family is singing Sun's praises for all his support and compassion shown in recent days.   I tell my ex........."we did good, we created a fine SUN".  Oh......and of course my ex.........he's hurting, they all are............so I be strong, have to.  I AM strong.   I've had experience in losing a parent.  My Dad.  I know.  My mother out law passed years and years before.......even before what I like to refer to as the longest marriage ever........considering.........well, that's a whole different story.

 

Thankful that me own Mum is well......assorted health issues, yet nothing so bad.  Embarrassing, as she is 90 too(same age as father out law).........and sometimes it seems to me that she's more active than moi.  I get frustrated with my own continued challenges at times.

 

 The other grief is.  Well it is.  I mean I still cry/weep.  Go through all those stages that we do.......with the exception of denial and bargaining.  I'm done with those.  Well, knock on wood........I hope I am.  Less of that horrid loneliness........starting to enjoy my own company and self again........slowly but surely.  And I have my faith........that inside outside sense that I am right where I am supposed to be.........to pay attention.........it's all going to be fine.

 

 It's been hard to see most of it as a true blue wave, like they used to be..........it's more of a sensitive person with an ultra sensitive nervous system now.  I've had resurgences of lot's of withdrawal symptoms in any case.   I've slowed down.........I keep in mind that I am more in the acute phase of grief and don't obsess too much about it all.   

 So........let's see, some symptoms and I'll do the resolved completely or intermittent still........... 

 Headaches(resolved, those were back in March, April)

DP/DR- not to an extreme but sometimes........that in another world feeling comes over me.  Deja vu anyone?

Easily overstimulated......noise, lighting, crowds(better)  I often feel like I'm trying to do too much as well........just get overwhelmed.  Have to work hard on mindfulness, just today, and all the positives or silver linings that really are still here.

Some supersensory hearing again.......although I don't really know on this one.......but I often hear so clearly others conversations at quite a distance........it's kind of cool. Tinnitis(intermittent only......I had not even noticed it anymore until March)

Blurry vision......time to use my farsighted lenses more often, not a biggie, I just have to accept glasses on my face more often.

SI- oh so brief too.  I change that channel quickly to "hang in there mmt, you're in the acuity of grief."  

Had some chest pain(resolved), palpitations(resolved).

 

This one is almost funny.......parasympathetic overdrive........which would be the opposite to cortisol reactions........ my other people mirrors tell me I seem really calm too, and sleep is always good.  Oh but just more recently some anger and irritability.........small scale.  I hope to write some rap tunes to deal with it and make myself laugh. 

 

And....Oh darn......demotivation and apathy at times.

   

 I got lazy too.  Training commences NOW.  Walk/runs, yoga, and to the pool for this one.  Take some pictures.  Sit outside more often with a book.  Get Betsey Ross cat groomed.  And I may make it all summer without A/C in Seymour.  Consuelo sadly sits in the garage.  I'm sure I can start her up with a jump........well, pretty sure and then pay for diagnostics and decide.  I think I will donate her to my favorite radio station.

 

Oh......and then I got one of my mouth infections again........no body rash........just the stomatitis type thing.........which is ugh.........it's all clear now...... yet it does come with some fatigue.  The best cure for fatigue for me has always been getting more physical movement and exercise in.........and so off I go........... 

Due diligence really, for me........as to what works and then doing it. 

 

Oh, I've isolated a bit.  Then get one good day out and do it again.  I'm working on a whole new routine I think.  It's just time to.  More of a realist perhaps.......or maybe I'll come back more fully as time goes on.  I've got a lot of fears to rid myself of........once again.  AA, 12 steps helps.  My most awesome therapist helps with some basic ideas.  I know I wrote here once before that Self Love doesn't equal Self Care..........well now I think it does.......that the 2 ARE interrelated.  In a most healthy and balanced way. 

 

 Town Daze this week here in Paradise too.  Each town around here does a special celebration in the summer.    I'm going to the Senior dinner tonight........I'm a Junior Senior, now........at 61.......supposed to be 65, yet they said it's okay and am going with an older Senior friend(ex hubs).   And then to the Rodeo later this week.  I'll probably watch the parade as well as go to the park for music and eats as well.   Maybe buy something at one of the booths.   

 

 

Okay......that helped.......rather lengthly and mostly just for me and my journal/progress/history.

Thanks for the space.

Love, peace, healing, and growth,

manymoretodays..........better ones, healthier ones, balanced ones

 

 

Edited by manymoretodays
spacing, obsessing :-)

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

Link to comment
On 8/7/2018 at 12:56 PM, manymoretodays said:

I'm going to the Senior dinner tonight........I'm a Junior Senior, now........at 61.......supposed to be 65, yet they said it's okay and am going with an older Senior friend(ex hubs).   And then to the Rodeo later this week.  I'll probably watch the parade as well as go to the park for music and eats as well.   Maybe buy something at one of the booths.   

 

I had never heard the "junior senior" thing before, haha, I'll have to tell my mom.

2004: Clonazepam and Celexa. 2005 - 2006: Effexor, then increased to high dose, then switched to Valproate and Seroquel. 2007: Wellbutrin + Strattera + Celexa. 2007 - 2008: Wellbutrin + Adderall + Paxil. 2008 - 2012: Wellbutrin + occasional SSRIs when I had worsened "depression", which happened around 4 times, usually after CT of WB. 2012 - 2014: WB + Sertraline, then WB + Pristiq (awful W/D) then WB + rTMS, then ketamine. 2014 - 2016: Wellbutrin 200 mg + Abilify 4 mg + Adderall 20-40 mg + Cipralex 20 mg. Oct 2016: "Tapered" Cipralex, felt outrageously anxious, irritable. Dec 2016: "Tapered" Adderall, then felt depressed, hopeless, fatigued.  Feb 6 2017: reinstated 20 mg Adderall. Mar 2017: switched to Vyvanse, upped to 30 mg. May - Aug 2017: "Tapered" Vyvanse + Abilify to zero. Oct 25, 2017: Wellbutrin from 200 to 100 mg. Sep 10, 2018:  Wellbutrin from 90 to 60 mg. Oct 29, 2018: WB from 60 to 50 mg. Dec 19, 2018: WB from 50 to 45 mg. Apr 15, 2019: WB 41 mg. May 14, 2019: WB 37 mg. Jun 8, 2019: WB 33 mg. Jul 22: WB 30 mg, then down by around 10% per month. Aug 2020: 0

 

Working hard to take my life back. Anything I say here is as a friend or peer supporter; it is not medical advice.

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  • Moderator Emeritus

That would be fine Marmot.  When I was double 5's I went on and on about 55 and over communities..........how they should be integrated with 5 year olds.  And that was my terminology....55 and over.  Well time flies.......B)  Junior Senior now.......there ought to be a Prom........don't you think?

I think they use the term senile for our organs after a certain age too!!!!  I went with my Mum to her Dr. and asked why she wrote senile on so many of her notes..........she said that's just a term for old.  We could sure use some new vocabulary, eh?  My Mum is pretty sharp.......not demented or senile from what I can tell.........so I'm hopeful........aging is okay, natural, blah, blah, blah..........I don't let it bother me except around my birthday.  And I'm going to quit doing that even.  And just celebrate......

 

Love, peace, healing, and growth baby growth,

mmt

Edited by manymoretodays

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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  • 2 weeks later...
  • Moderator Emeritus

Saturday.......and okay, back to lavender.  I am still searching for forest green.  Beautiful weather.  Rains.  Some clear blue skies.

20 months out now from Trileptal/oxcarbazine, nearing 4 years off of escitalopram/Lexapro, and off the low dose Adderal salts for 3 years.  And of course......many more.

 

Company coming over labor day.  3 of them, so they have booked a hotel.  Only a little guilt producing.  And oh......I was thrown.  Do I not speak clearly or loud enough?  As I told my kin.......that.......this.......was........not........a great time........as I'm just catching up........in fits and starts.  Then I get texted with the plans.  So........I, like Rodney Dangerfield........never get much respect.  Or maybe it's the late Aretha Franklin.........RIP, what a gem..........R-E-S-P-E-C-T........it's one of her songs.  Maybe I can make the best of it and pretend I am on vacation every other day with them.  And I do hope to host a nice meal. 

 

I can't seem to get 2 nice neutral days in a row yet.  I suppose if that is the worst of my problems now, that is not so bad.  So.......it all still feels like a stall before something.  I'm not certain I'll get organized enough to actually take a vacation type thing or retreat at all.  Time flies.  The daylight is getting a bit shorter already in the days.  Full moon last night.  I sure hope that clears some of my recent feelings of chaos.  Man........it's hard........still.........sometimes..........to feel and embrace the whole gamut of emotions.

 

Walking helps.  I've yet to swim and yoga.  Kitchen dancing.  Eating.  Writing......on paper.  And lot's of talks with G-D, who I often refer to as Gomu.

I'm making 3 decisions/day.  This was a good idea from my neighbor friend.........I pick 3 things, and just tag them or separate them out....... as things that I can sell or give away.  In other words......part with.  So maybe a garage sale in the fall.  And I'd like to get a travel case that would fit into an overhead bin in an airplane.  And learn not to carry so much baggage when and if I travel again soon.  My neighbor and her hubs did a whole month in the U.K. that way.  It sounds so freeing.  Big Bertha is great........the swivel wheel thing is a must........honestly though........she's like a trunk or something.  I can learn to travel lightly sometimes.

 

Anyway........so travel or vacation is starting to feel like a pipe dream.  It's so darn healing for me though.  To get away.  Not run away.  Just be somewhere else for a bit.  We'll see.

 

I guess that's it for me and updating.  I thought I should.  It's been a couple of weeks now.  Oh tapping(EFT).......going well........so easy to do now that I have those acupressure points down.  And saw my therapist in person this week........I had done some phone visits.  She's great.  Very peer like.  Sun(son) good I hope........time for my update from him, and hopefully he'll be around for the "family visit".

 

Oh.....I forgot.  Root canal after the "family visit".  My first.  I just finished some Amoxicillin which helped........it may have thrown me slightly emotionally.......I don't know.  So......basically another cavity that impinges on the root system and nerves.  Ugh.  Could be worse.  I hate spending the money on such though.......I have a dental plan that keeps things cheaper.......but still.........oh well.  Such is life.

 

Okay.  Be well enough.

Love, peace, healing, and growth,

mmt

 

Edited by manymoretodays
link, spelling, grammar

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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Hi @manymoretodays

 

I’m gathering purple is your favourite colour. I love how many colours there are n how many different shades of each colour there are. 

 

Wow! You’re doing so well having been off your meds for such a long time now. You are such an inspiration.

 

Travel doesn’t have to seem so far away. That made me sad when you said that. What about taking a weekend away somewhere not too far, somewhere surrounded by nature where one can get one’s thoughts straight. I find in nature I get a lot of breakthroughs in thinking, also being in a different environment.

 

My sister lives down the Coast n I stay with her sometimes, she’s not far from the beach, but we also go for a drive up to the mountains. I have lots of friends I can stay with too if I need a change of scenery. 

 

I’m glad you’re doing EFT. I used to do a lot of FasterEft, I like it better than the other type. I must start up again n get rid of some of the emotions that are dragging me down. It works really well, I just have to make it routine. I have a friend who is a practitioner as well.

 

I hope you get to go on a little vacation manymoretodays, 

 

Sending you hugs🤗

Been on APs, benzos, ADs and opiates, for chronic pain. Had Akathisia in the past that made me suicidal. Still on Seroquel. 2019:➡️ March10=7.25mg ✔️ April17=7.0✔️ June5=6.75✔️ July14=6.50✔️ Aug28=6.25✔️ Oct10=6.20  ✔️ Oct21=6.0✔️ Dec16=5.80 ✔️ 2020➡️ Jan 21=5.60 ✔️ April2=5.40 ✔️ May29=5.20 ✔️ Aug14= 5.0 ✔️Sep29=4.80✔️2021➡️ Jan31=4.60 mg✔️ April24=4.40mg✔️Jul17=4.30mg ✔️ Aug 28=4.20 ✔️ Oct 11=4.15✔️Nov1=4.10 ✔️ Nov21= 4.05✔️ Dec13= 4mg ✔️2022 ➡️ Jan8=3.95✔️ Jan31=3.90✔️ March2=3.85 ✔️ April4=3.80 ✔️ June16=3.75✔️ July26=3.70✔️ Sep2=3.65✔️ Oct21=3.60 ✔️ Dec8=3.55✔️2023➡️ Jan 26=3.50✔️ March 17=3.45✔️ June12=3.40✔️ July30=3.35✔️ Sep14=3.30✔️ Oct31=3.25✔️This is NOT medical advice.Consult your doctor.

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Hi Carmie. 

Sometimes purple.......I'm not sure I have a favorite color anymore.  I do like the greens as well.  Oh and the yellows......and reds......and turquoise.  Color is great!

 

Oh.....don't be feeling bad for me.  I live the life of Riley!    I'm in an area with lot's of nature.  I'm post due to go camping....... before it gets too cold at night.  And can access some beautiful landscapes really quickly.  I just don't have an ocean nearby.  No reason I can't get away from home for a couple of nights soon.  I'm not feeling brave enough.......yet........to go visit some of my friends/family who live out of state....... and with oceans nearby.  Soon, I hope. 

 

I had a loss of a friend not too long ago, and that has set me back a little bit.  I'm hard on myself too......I don't want to go anywhere, until I have my home and garden in better shape.  I've neglected some things in my grief processing.

 

I'm wanting to go on some form of retreat to learn more about something.........be it of a spiritual nature, or alternative healing.  Or I may try and book something with a travel group, and go explore somewhere I've never been.

 

Interesting.......I had not heard of fasterEFT.  Sometimes I don't do all 9 points.  It's so easy, and really does work well for me.  "Even though...........(fill in the dotted lines)  I deeply and completely Love and accept myself."  I Love it.  Often times my "Even though" part is........"Even though I am running late......I deeply and completely........"    B)  I'm getting more timely and organized but often.......well, late for stuff.  Improving.......no reason to be too early, eh?

 

Every day is a vacation.  Thank you so much for stopping by Carmie........you are so sweet!

 

Love, peace, healing, and growth,

mmt

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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16 hours ago, manymoretodays said:

I had not heard of fasterEFT.  Sometimes I don't do all 9 points.  It's so easy, and really does work well for me. 

 

That's great that the EFT works for you, mmt. I'll have to try it sometime.

 

2020: After 18+ years (entire adult life) on Paxil, a dangerous doctor-led "taper" in 2015, and four years tapering off the last 1 mg thanks to SA and the Brassmonkey slide, 

I AM COMPLETELY FREE OF PAXIL! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! Forever.

 

2021: Began conservative, proper, CNS-respecting taper of Zoloft, led by the only expert on me -- me. Making own liquid. 5-10% plus holds.

2022: Holding on Zoloft for now. Current dose 47 mg. Hanging in, hanging on. Severe protracted PAWS, windows and waves. While I may not be doing "a lot" by outside standards, things are graaaaadually getting better

 

Yoga (gentle to medium); walks; daily breath practice; nutrition, fruits/veg; nature; water; EastEnders (lol); practicing self-compassion, self-care; boundaries; connection; allowing feelings; t r u s t ing that I, too, will heal. (--> may need to be reminded of this.)

"You are not alone, and this is not the end of your story." - Baylissa

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It's pretty easy peasy SkyBlue, and I'm ever-so interested in learning more(keen) on the acupressure/accupuncture points, and chakra's, and meridians and oh........just have to focus on in.

 

......and update.

Walked, swam and sauna-ed plus pool yoga, and some yoga at home.

Company coming today!  I'm now rather excited as the weather is beauticious, and I shall tag along for some stuff.   Eat out and eat well.....also celebrate a milestone birthday with a friend.   Might put "the company" to work........just a few things.......electronics management, and a bit of tree trimming.  Barbecue duties too!

 

The neighbors came on Monday last.......3 lovely young families and we pretty much knocked off most of my summer yard work in a couple of hours.

I've got an interesting tree anomaly going on with a couple of my trees......so I need to photograph, and send off a picture to the experts to see what is what with that.  And generally just tidy up things outside so I'll be good and ready next spring.  So.....maybe just a couple fall plantings(flowers, herbs) to begin my garden renovation.   I'll no doubt have to do some digging and edging and study all my plant books.  I'm just glad that I'm feeling "into it" or interested in things again.  I've got the tree guys coming just for some minor trims too, and then will do more in the spring, as I've learned that fall tree trims produce huge growths the next spring and.........well, I'm happy that for the most part the trees are doing well and I live in a forest in the desert.  B)

 

I may hold on fall planting of too much...... and get onto some porch and shed painting instead.......get creative with it........maybe even get a new mailbox and paint it on up too.

My old one, mailbox leaks water into it and has lost a latch, and although I think the U.S. postal service should give me a new one.......it's not to be.

 

Yard sale or fall travel?  Fall travel or yard sale?  Or both?  Anyway.......things are looking on up and so am I.  Hair done.  Betsey Ross Cat however still needs hers done........soon.  She's just happy that it is getting cooler and more comfortable for her.  She is huge and has a ton of hair that sheds everywhere, and also gets messed up in rats and snaggles.

 

I'm definitely getting some 2 day runs of good enough now, and maybe even 3.  Just cautiously moving forward a bit again.  And feel so much better.......finally, things more in the right perspective again.  I hope it lasts, yet totally anticipate a bit of fluctuation from time to time.

 

I think that's it.  Hmmm, I'll be back to add to if I think of something really important I must type.

 

Okie dokie, from the land of pokie hokie,

Love, peace, healing, and growth,

mmt 

Edited by manymoretodays
elaboration, grammar

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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MMT, 

It sounds as if your transition in June has evened out, and you are feeling less uncomfortable.  I'm happy for you.  

 

I want to tidy the yard, too.  My mind is messy, and I hope it will help if I can tidy what I see around me.  It's hard to find time when I feel capable of taking the action, but someday . . . It's nice to see you being able to do so.  Gives me hope.  

 

I'm also in a high desert forest. I have about 50 live oak trees.  One is about 200-300 years old.  Many are young.  A few are about 50-100.  They grow and grow and drop billions of leaves.  One is breaking up my driveway, but it is such a beautiful tree.  The crows and the woodrats love the acorns.  Apparently, the native people here ground the acorns and soaked them in the stream nearby to leach out the toxins, and then they ate them.  There are indentations in the boulders near the stream where the natives ground acorns.  I like to imagine this place free of all the noise and light pollution.  I wish there were one day a month when there was a blackout for just a few hours when I could be guaranteed peace, quiet and darkness here so that I could listen to the sounds of the night in complete darkness except for the moon and stars.  

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/16629-rosetta-ct-may-2011-too-fast-taper-feb-2017/?page=25

2001-2011 Celexa 10 mg raised to 40 mg then 60 mg over this time period

May 2011 OB Doctor's Cold switch Celexa 60 mg to 10 mg Zoloft sertraline (baby born)

2012-2016 - Doctors raised dose of Zoloft up to 150 mg

2016 - Xanax prescribed - as needed - 0.5 mg about every 3 days (bad reaction)

2016 - Stopped Xanax

Late 2016- Began (too fast) taper of Zoloft

Early 2017 - Trazodone prescribed for bedtime (doseage unknown)

Feb 2017 - Completed taper/stopped Trazodone

Drug free since Feb 2017

2017 - Unisom otc very rarely for sleep

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Hi @manymoretodays

Hope you’re having a good day. I’m glad u enjoyed your walk n swim. There’s nothing like nature n water, I’m happiest in nature. How marvellous that your neighbours helped u with your yard work, it must be looking quite smashing. I live in a unit n just have a balcony so there’s no yard work to do. 

 

Have u made your plans for camping as yet? It is nice to have things to look forward to n even better if it involves nature. Anticipation of happy things certainly lifts the spirits. You sound like a very happy person in general though, looks like to have lots of plans all the time. Keep up that great attitude.

 

Have a happy day☀️☀️☀️

 

 

 

Been on APs, benzos, ADs and opiates, for chronic pain. Had Akathisia in the past that made me suicidal. Still on Seroquel. 2019:➡️ March10=7.25mg ✔️ April17=7.0✔️ June5=6.75✔️ July14=6.50✔️ Aug28=6.25✔️ Oct10=6.20  ✔️ Oct21=6.0✔️ Dec16=5.80 ✔️ 2020➡️ Jan 21=5.60 ✔️ April2=5.40 ✔️ May29=5.20 ✔️ Aug14= 5.0 ✔️Sep29=4.80✔️2021➡️ Jan31=4.60 mg✔️ April24=4.40mg✔️Jul17=4.30mg ✔️ Aug 28=4.20 ✔️ Oct 11=4.15✔️Nov1=4.10 ✔️ Nov21= 4.05✔️ Dec13= 4mg ✔️2022 ➡️ Jan8=3.95✔️ Jan31=3.90✔️ March2=3.85 ✔️ April4=3.80 ✔️ June16=3.75✔️ July26=3.70✔️ Sep2=3.65✔️ Oct21=3.60 ✔️ Dec8=3.55✔️2023➡️ Jan 26=3.50✔️ March 17=3.45✔️ June12=3.40✔️ July30=3.35✔️ Sep14=3.30✔️ Oct31=3.25✔️This is NOT medical advice.Consult your doctor.

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On 8/31/2018 at 11:06 AM, Rosetta said:

I'm also in a high desert forest. I have about 50 live oak trees.  One is about 200-300 years old.  Many are young.  A few are about 50-100.  They grow and grow and drop billions of leaves.  One is breaking up my driveway, but it is such a beautiful tree.  The crows and the woodrats love the acorns.  Apparently, the native people here ground the acorns and soaked them in the stream nearby to leach out the toxins, and then they ate them.  There are indentations in the boulders near the stream where the natives ground acorns.  I like to imagine this place free of all the noise and light pollution.  I wish there were one day a month when there was a blackout for just a few hours when I could be guaranteed peace, quiet and darkness here so that I could listen to the sounds of the night in complete darkness except for the moon and stars

 

Nice.  No squirrels? And active streams!  I love the part about the natives.  I wonder what remnants we will leave behind sometimes.

It get's busy with traffic and noise around here now too, Rosetta.  Sundays are the most peaceful.  At night not so bad.......when it's late.  I went out after reading this and communed for a few with the night sounds and nature.  B) 

 

18 hours ago, Carmie said:

Hope you’re having a good day. I’m glad u enjoyed your walk n swim. There’s nothing like nature n water, I’m happiest in nature. How marvellous that your neighbours helped u with your yard work, it must be looking quite smashing. I live in a unit n just have a balcony so there’s no yard work to do. 

 

It looks nice......not quite smashing yet........we trimmed one white birch type tree so more of the white trunk shows.  That came out really nice.......very artistic looking and picturesque, reminds me of Minnesota for some reason.  That's a midwest State with lot's of lakes and trees.  A balcony sounds nice.   At least for the time being.......I think I need yard work as somewhat nature retreat and creative pursuit.

 

No plans made yet.  Just getting through the long weekend now...... with my family members in town for their vacation.  I'm so trying to be in "vacation mind" but not quite there yet.  Seems like a lot of extra juggling to my days........well worth it though I'm certain.  I think I may be suffering from some sibling rivalry or something with my sister, to be honest.  I'll meditate on it or write/pray on paper.  That always lifts away what I might be obsessing on......or just helps.

 

I can so relate to being an introvert, extrovert sometimes.  I think you had said you were like that too, somewhere, Carmie.

 

Beautiful day in the neighborhood and peaceful, today, Sunday.

Hope it's a good one for all!

 

Love, peace, healing, and growth,

mmt

Edited by manymoretodays
balcony thought. introvert, extrovert comment

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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Hi Mmt, 

 

Your birch tree sounds fabulous. I can always see the art in trees too. I love looking at the trunks, the branches n the leaves. I love it too when there aren’t any leaves on trees n you can see the amazing configurations of the branches. Went to a lake one day n there were trees without leaves in it, it was beautiful.

 

Hope you’ve been having fun on your family vacation💚

Been on APs, benzos, ADs and opiates, for chronic pain. Had Akathisia in the past that made me suicidal. Still on Seroquel. 2019:➡️ March10=7.25mg ✔️ April17=7.0✔️ June5=6.75✔️ July14=6.50✔️ Aug28=6.25✔️ Oct10=6.20  ✔️ Oct21=6.0✔️ Dec16=5.80 ✔️ 2020➡️ Jan 21=5.60 ✔️ April2=5.40 ✔️ May29=5.20 ✔️ Aug14= 5.0 ✔️Sep29=4.80✔️2021➡️ Jan31=4.60 mg✔️ April24=4.40mg✔️Jul17=4.30mg ✔️ Aug 28=4.20 ✔️ Oct 11=4.15✔️Nov1=4.10 ✔️ Nov21= 4.05✔️ Dec13= 4mg ✔️2022 ➡️ Jan8=3.95✔️ Jan31=3.90✔️ March2=3.85 ✔️ April4=3.80 ✔️ June16=3.75✔️ July26=3.70✔️ Sep2=3.65✔️ Oct21=3.60 ✔️ Dec8=3.55✔️2023➡️ Jan 26=3.50✔️ March 17=3.45✔️ June12=3.40✔️ July30=3.35✔️ Sep14=3.30✔️ Oct31=3.25✔️This is NOT medical advice.Consult your doctor.

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So far so good post root canal procedure this morning.  I have a great dentist!

 

I did do the Nitrous Oxide for the first time(it was also my first ever root canal) and honestly.........I was so anxious about the whole thing all week.........it's the best I've felt in awhile.  He also does a pretty good nerve block numbing. 

 

So far just ibuprofen when I got home, and I may not need any pain medication.  The jury is still out on if it will feel worse later, and I did fill the script........but.......ahhhhhhh,  glad that's done and over.

 

Watching movies and taking it a little easy.  I've got some plants to put in the garden.  Oh, and might go see some music with the Sun(son) next week.  A band called the Head and the Heart.  I tried to win tickets off the radio station but no luck.  I'll buy some if they are not outrageously priced.

 

Love, peace, healing, and growth,

mmt

 

......on the Nitrous Oxide.......not a recommendation for fears and/or anxiety.  I'm a ways out now(off meds) and discussed it with my dentist pretty thoroughly.  It's possible I may have to face some rebound anxiety.......I hope not.  I'm a slow metabolizer often........so we'll see.......time will tell.  He got through the procedure in record time too!!  B)  It all went better than hoped.

Edited by manymoretodays

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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Hi Manymoretodays, 

 

Just checking in to see how you’re doing since your dentist appointment, hope you’re okay. 

 

Have fun gardening n I hope you enjoy your concert next week. I’ve got three coming up so far but the first one isn’t until December. You have to buy tickets for big concerts way in advance. I think I may have payed for one concert a year in advance. 

 

Take care, sending hugs🤗

Been on APs, benzos, ADs and opiates, for chronic pain. Had Akathisia in the past that made me suicidal. Still on Seroquel. 2019:➡️ March10=7.25mg ✔️ April17=7.0✔️ June5=6.75✔️ July14=6.50✔️ Aug28=6.25✔️ Oct10=6.20  ✔️ Oct21=6.0✔️ Dec16=5.80 ✔️ 2020➡️ Jan 21=5.60 ✔️ April2=5.40 ✔️ May29=5.20 ✔️ Aug14= 5.0 ✔️Sep29=4.80✔️2021➡️ Jan31=4.60 mg✔️ April24=4.40mg✔️Jul17=4.30mg ✔️ Aug 28=4.20 ✔️ Oct 11=4.15✔️Nov1=4.10 ✔️ Nov21= 4.05✔️ Dec13= 4mg ✔️2022 ➡️ Jan8=3.95✔️ Jan31=3.90✔️ March2=3.85 ✔️ April4=3.80 ✔️ June16=3.75✔️ July26=3.70✔️ Sep2=3.65✔️ Oct21=3.60 ✔️ Dec8=3.55✔️2023➡️ Jan 26=3.50✔️ March 17=3.45✔️ June12=3.40✔️ July30=3.35✔️ Sep14=3.30✔️ Oct31=3.25✔️This is NOT medical advice.Consult your doctor.

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