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Faithbarelysurviving: Too damaged?


Faithbarelysurviving

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It is really complicated.....I am like a crazy brain damaged person

Please have patience and read : a great Mental Health Care System indeed/Never been hospitalized prior to starting meds

-Not sure all is accurate:2005 Diag. with major depression and anxiety after second birth

-switched AD,getting worse (maybe:Celexa, Effexor, Wellbutrin-diagnosed with bp

-Zyprexa, stopped it fast, got hosp.,Seroquel incr. at 300mg, wors. depr, akathisia bad,

-changed dr.,dropped Seroquel 300mg to 100mg !!!-

-new dr.got me off Seroquel in 1 mth at home!!Lamictal to help...getting worse,was also taking Clonazepam

-severe muscle twiches, dp/dr,neck and shoulder muscles tight straight like cement, psychotic, bedridden for 1yr

-Got put on Zoloft in the hosp.,and 3 mg of Clonazepam, "Stabilized" some after some months, 5-6,

-Came off Zoloft by dropping some weekly, not knowing better!debilitating symptoms, got back on, tried to reduce Clonazepam after research.Prof. Ashton; hosp., asked dr. to follow Dr Ashton, he dropped 3 mg Clon. in One day!put on much less Valium...hysterical,pain,rage,couldn t breathe,akathisia etc etc

-Zoloft up to 200mg!, hyperv. muscles tight like cement...my dr., on vacation!!Other dr red.zoloft, gave me Remeron

Current meds:Buspirone 20mg,Tegretol200mg,Trazadone 50 mg,Clonaz. 3mg,Escital.15mg,Propran.20mg,Bupropr.150mg,Baclofen30mg,Gabapentin200mg, taken 4 times/day in various comb

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Faith, honestly I think you will first start to be able to coordinate your movements and keep your head up if the half of your medicaments would be away. Then maybe after 5-6 months. It takes a lot of time, but it is worth it.

They have destroyed me...I am like a vegetable mind and body, then i get hysterical.....I am a mother, i have photos of me and my kids... I was normal..... They have destroyed my family.... It is my fault i went to them ..... Why would anybody invent such poisons??? No memories of my pregnancies, my births, my wedding, my childhood, yesterday or moments ago...I am a totally different person, i am not even human anymorr, I don t feel empathy or love...jus numbness, bitterness, anger , negativeness, not even in ttoich with my own flesh and blood....and the suffering and torture.... My husband says I was a kind person, emphatic, very sensitive, wanted to help

everybody, too sensitive perhaps and too emphatic that is why i got crushed by everybody's problems that would put all on my shoulders since a young age....I was strong though, others would have rebelled or killed themselves... God talking about chosing your parents...

Please have patience and read : a great Mental Health Care System indeed/Never been hospitalized prior to starting meds

-Not sure all is accurate:2005 Diag. with major depression and anxiety after second birth

-switched AD,getting worse (maybe:Celexa, Effexor, Wellbutrin-diagnosed with bp

-Zyprexa, stopped it fast, got hosp.,Seroquel incr. at 300mg, wors. depr, akathisia bad,

-changed dr.,dropped Seroquel 300mg to 100mg !!!-

-new dr.got me off Seroquel in 1 mth at home!!Lamictal to help...getting worse,was also taking Clonazepam

-severe muscle twiches, dp/dr,neck and shoulder muscles tight straight like cement, psychotic, bedridden for 1yr

-Got put on Zoloft in the hosp.,and 3 mg of Clonazepam, "Stabilized" some after some months, 5-6,

-Came off Zoloft by dropping some weekly, not knowing better!debilitating symptoms, got back on, tried to reduce Clonazepam after research.Prof. Ashton; hosp., asked dr. to follow Dr Ashton, he dropped 3 mg Clon. in One day!put on much less Valium...hysterical,pain,rage,couldn t breathe,akathisia etc etc

-Zoloft up to 200mg!, hyperv. muscles tight like cement...my dr., on vacation!!Other dr red.zoloft, gave me Remeron

Current meds:Buspirone 20mg,Tegretol200mg,Trazadone 50 mg,Clonaz. 3mg,Escital.15mg,Propran.20mg,Bupropr.150mg,Baclofen30mg,Gabapentin200mg, taken 4 times/day in various comb

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Blessings to you Martina, and to your lottle one ...i believe that is you and your child in the photo right?

You are too kind to me...

Please have patience and read : a great Mental Health Care System indeed/Never been hospitalized prior to starting meds

-Not sure all is accurate:2005 Diag. with major depression and anxiety after second birth

-switched AD,getting worse (maybe:Celexa, Effexor, Wellbutrin-diagnosed with bp

-Zyprexa, stopped it fast, got hosp.,Seroquel incr. at 300mg, wors. depr, akathisia bad,

-changed dr.,dropped Seroquel 300mg to 100mg !!!-

-new dr.got me off Seroquel in 1 mth at home!!Lamictal to help...getting worse,was also taking Clonazepam

-severe muscle twiches, dp/dr,neck and shoulder muscles tight straight like cement, psychotic, bedridden for 1yr

-Got put on Zoloft in the hosp.,and 3 mg of Clonazepam, "Stabilized" some after some months, 5-6,

-Came off Zoloft by dropping some weekly, not knowing better!debilitating symptoms, got back on, tried to reduce Clonazepam after research.Prof. Ashton; hosp., asked dr. to follow Dr Ashton, he dropped 3 mg Clon. in One day!put on much less Valium...hysterical,pain,rage,couldn t breathe,akathisia etc etc

-Zoloft up to 200mg!, hyperv. muscles tight like cement...my dr., on vacation!!Other dr red.zoloft, gave me Remeron

Current meds:Buspirone 20mg,Tegretol200mg,Trazadone 50 mg,Clonaz. 3mg,Escital.15mg,Propran.20mg,Bupropr.150mg,Baclofen30mg,Gabapentin200mg, taken 4 times/day in various comb

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Faith, I have twins, Benjamin and Emily, now 2,5 years old. I will post some photos, but first I have to manage that they have less than 50 kb in other case they cant be posted. I understand you very well, I fight myself to get out of the grip of psychiatry. But please try to fight for your life, you can not change this medical negligence which caused you so much harm. You can fight yourself out of this. I still think that the brain can make new pathways and you could do very well. You have only to start doing something for you.

05/2013 Lyrica 100 mg / per day for pain + PGAD resulting from caesarian delivery11/2014 started to taper: 50 mg per day/ for one week then c/tafter one month reinstated at 50 mg /per days of 10 July 2015 drug free-

symptoms OCD

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First, please forgive my ignorance, but is that you in your avatar or someone classic I should know about and don't?

 

I was reading yesterday about doctor's monitoring patients on opioids and the doctor used this phrase, "When the patient starts showing evidence of neuroplastic changes..." He was referring to the addictive and irritable behavior that can be seen and he was saying in effect, "Remember, this is the normal response of a healthy brain to these drugs." Think about that...

1st round Prozac 1989/90, clear depression symptoms. 2nd round Prozac started 1999 when admitted to dr. I was tired. Prozac pooped out, switch to Cymbalta 3/2006. Diagnosed with bipolar disorder due to mania 6/2006--then I was taken abruptly off Cymbalta and didn't know I had SSRI withdrawal. Lots of meds for my intractable "bipolar" symptoms.

Zyprexa started about 9/06, mostly 5mg. Tapered 4/12 through12/29/12

Wellbutrin. XL 300 mg started 1/07, tapered 1/18/13 through 7/8/13

Oxazepam mostly continuously since 6/06, 30mg since 12/12, tapered 1.17.14 through 8.26.15

11/06 Lithium 600mg twice daily, 2.2.14 400mg TID DIY liquid, 2.12.14 1150mg, 3.2.14 1100mg, 3.18.14 1075mg, 4/14 updose to 1100mg, 6.1.14 900 mg capsules 7.8.14 810mg, 8.17.14 725mg, 8.24.24 700mg...10.22.14 487.5mg, 3.9.15 475mg, 4.1.15 462.5mg 4.21.15 450mg 8.11.15 375mg, 11.28.15 362.5mg, back to 375mg four days later, 3.4.16 updose to 475 (too much going on to risk trouble)

9/4/13 Toprol-XL 25mg daily for sudden hypertension, tapered 11.12.13 through 5.3.14, last 10 days or so switched to atenolol

7.4.14 Started Walsh Protocol

56 years old

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one of my favorite actresses-Audrey Hepburn

went on Prozac 1994-99,60mg.poopout ct  back on 2001-2002,prozac weekly 2002,not working,Effexor 75 mg.?2003-mar.2004 gaining weight 8wk. taper,wellbutrin 150 mg.mar. -may 2004 ctmedfree til july 2005 back to Prozac gaining weight again,back on wellbutrin jan.2006150-300 mg.bad constipation.also was taking aygestin(hormone)perimenopausal irregular bleeding.back on Prozac around sept,?2006,hysterectomy jan30.2007(adenomyosis)off&on Prozac til 2009,citalopram about 1 mo, April 2010 no effect,Effexor again may -mar, 2011.ct,Prozac aug,-dec, 2011 &sept-nov 2012,paroxetine oct,23 2013-may 4 2014 20 mgs.tapered 6 wks.-failed RI in Oct.2014-in protracted WD.started 10 mgs. Fluoxetine May 25 2021 .Stopped fluoxetine May 2022 at 5 mgs.

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  • Administrator

Faith, did you reduce the buspirone?

 

Did you print out this post as I requested? http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8945-faithbarelysurviving-too-damaged/?p=161004

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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Dear Altostrata, I did cut from Buspirone, the 5pm dosage. No I did not print that I do not have a printer. Why do you want me to print it out? Can you send it to me via e mail so that I can send it to my husband's work to print it out?

Please have patience and read : a great Mental Health Care System indeed/Never been hospitalized prior to starting meds

-Not sure all is accurate:2005 Diag. with major depression and anxiety after second birth

-switched AD,getting worse (maybe:Celexa, Effexor, Wellbutrin-diagnosed with bp

-Zyprexa, stopped it fast, got hosp.,Seroquel incr. at 300mg, wors. depr, akathisia bad,

-changed dr.,dropped Seroquel 300mg to 100mg !!!-

-new dr.got me off Seroquel in 1 mth at home!!Lamictal to help...getting worse,was also taking Clonazepam

-severe muscle twiches, dp/dr,neck and shoulder muscles tight straight like cement, psychotic, bedridden for 1yr

-Got put on Zoloft in the hosp.,and 3 mg of Clonazepam, "Stabilized" some after some months, 5-6,

-Came off Zoloft by dropping some weekly, not knowing better!debilitating symptoms, got back on, tried to reduce Clonazepam after research.Prof. Ashton; hosp., asked dr. to follow Dr Ashton, he dropped 3 mg Clon. in One day!put on much less Valium...hysterical,pain,rage,couldn t breathe,akathisia etc etc

-Zoloft up to 200mg!, hyperv. muscles tight like cement...my dr., on vacation!!Other dr red.zoloft, gave me Remeron

Current meds:Buspirone 20mg,Tegretol200mg,Trazadone 50 mg,Clonaz. 3mg,Escital.15mg,Propran.20mg,Bupropr.150mg,Baclofen30mg,Gabapentin200mg, taken 4 times/day in various comb

Link to comment

First, please forgive my ignorance, but is that you in your avatar or someone classic I should know about and don't?

I was reading yesterday about doctor's monitoring patients on opioids and the doctor used this phrase, "When the patient starts showing evidence of neuroplastic changes..." He was referring to the addictive and irritable behavior that can be seen and he was saying in effect, "Remember, this is the normal response of a healthy brain to these drugs." Think about that...

Audrey H no not me.I have nothing to forgive you for dear, i don t even remember her well or her name. I had such difficulty putting the picture as my avatar.....brain dead.....too paranoid to put a picture of myself plus it doesn t work and i am to limmited in my thinking as to how to modify the photo size....it s a miracle i can write you ...

I just want my mind back, my neck and body, but first my mind, so that I know to whom i am writing to.... to be empathic to try and help you all, to be with my family like a normal person...i am a burden to my family, my children need their mom and I am in la la land...they are so affected...worry about me, get scared, I should die, i am a coward I should go in a mental institution and let my family be at peace

Please have patience and read : a great Mental Health Care System indeed/Never been hospitalized prior to starting meds

-Not sure all is accurate:2005 Diag. with major depression and anxiety after second birth

-switched AD,getting worse (maybe:Celexa, Effexor, Wellbutrin-diagnosed with bp

-Zyprexa, stopped it fast, got hosp.,Seroquel incr. at 300mg, wors. depr, akathisia bad,

-changed dr.,dropped Seroquel 300mg to 100mg !!!-

-new dr.got me off Seroquel in 1 mth at home!!Lamictal to help...getting worse,was also taking Clonazepam

-severe muscle twiches, dp/dr,neck and shoulder muscles tight straight like cement, psychotic, bedridden for 1yr

-Got put on Zoloft in the hosp.,and 3 mg of Clonazepam, "Stabilized" some after some months, 5-6,

-Came off Zoloft by dropping some weekly, not knowing better!debilitating symptoms, got back on, tried to reduce Clonazepam after research.Prof. Ashton; hosp., asked dr. to follow Dr Ashton, he dropped 3 mg Clon. in One day!put on much less Valium...hysterical,pain,rage,couldn t breathe,akathisia etc etc

-Zoloft up to 200mg!, hyperv. muscles tight like cement...my dr., on vacation!!Other dr red.zoloft, gave me Remeron

Current meds:Buspirone 20mg,Tegretol200mg,Trazadone 50 mg,Clonaz. 3mg,Escital.15mg,Propran.20mg,Bupropr.150mg,Baclofen30mg,Gabapentin200mg, taken 4 times/day in various comb

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  • Administrator

Faith, please stay consistent with the reduced evening buspirone dosage for at least 4 days. Let us know how you are doing.

 

You can copy and paste a post into e-mail and send it to your husband to print out.

 

You should have this to take to the hospital in case you need to go there.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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I have managed to send these to my husband, and now at the same time my mental state changed...My husband's response: I am doing this to myself. God I alone. Everyyhing changed my mood, perception, i don t remember from brfore, like my last posting, and now there is so much sadness, mind is realy bad, my brain is slowly dying , i am in such a dark place ...this is hell.

Please have patience and read : a great Mental Health Care System indeed/Never been hospitalized prior to starting meds

-Not sure all is accurate:2005 Diag. with major depression and anxiety after second birth

-switched AD,getting worse (maybe:Celexa, Effexor, Wellbutrin-diagnosed with bp

-Zyprexa, stopped it fast, got hosp.,Seroquel incr. at 300mg, wors. depr, akathisia bad,

-changed dr.,dropped Seroquel 300mg to 100mg !!!-

-new dr.got me off Seroquel in 1 mth at home!!Lamictal to help...getting worse,was also taking Clonazepam

-severe muscle twiches, dp/dr,neck and shoulder muscles tight straight like cement, psychotic, bedridden for 1yr

-Got put on Zoloft in the hosp.,and 3 mg of Clonazepam, "Stabilized" some after some months, 5-6,

-Came off Zoloft by dropping some weekly, not knowing better!debilitating symptoms, got back on, tried to reduce Clonazepam after research.Prof. Ashton; hosp., asked dr. to follow Dr Ashton, he dropped 3 mg Clon. in One day!put on much less Valium...hysterical,pain,rage,couldn t breathe,akathisia etc etc

-Zoloft up to 200mg!, hyperv. muscles tight like cement...my dr., on vacation!!Other dr red.zoloft, gave me Remeron

Current meds:Buspirone 20mg,Tegretol200mg,Trazadone 50 mg,Clonaz. 3mg,Escital.15mg,Propran.20mg,Bupropr.150mg,Baclofen30mg,Gabapentin200mg, taken 4 times/day in various comb

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  • Administrator

Along with taking care of yourself, you need to stop worrying about what other people think. You need to set your own path and stay on it.

 

Request calmly and clearly that your husband print out the e-mail you've sent him. Don't argue, and don't complain.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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I have managed to send these to my husband, and now at the same time my mental state changed...My husband's response: I am doing this to myself. God I alone. Everyyhing changed my mood, perception, i don t remember from brfore, like my last posting, and now there is so much sadness, mind is realy bad, my brain is slowly dying , i am in such a dark place ...this is hell.

 

 

I hope it printed them for you so at least you have them on hand. 

The changing mood and changing state of mind is very common in wd even without circumstances to encourage it.  There will come a time your realize this and a time even later when you accept it and just think ... oh this is a wd effect.  I know it is not easy... easy is not the hope or was not the hope for me.. I already knew by the time I was in wd it was not going to be easy... I was not looking for easy I was looking for possible. There will be ups and downs but they will pass both will pass...try to keep this in mind when the ok times are there .. get all you can out of it cause it won't last when the difficult times come know they will passes too.. wait it out distract yourself if you can if not just endure it I know enduring sucks but it is a big part of wd. Or it was for me at least. 

I wish you peace Faith

WARNING THIS WILL BE LONG
Had a car accident in 85
Codeine was the pain med when I was release from hosp continuous use till 89
Given PROZAC by a specialist to help with nerve pain in my leg 89-90 not sure which year
Was not told a thing about it being a psych med thought it was a pain killer no info about psych side effects I went nuts had hallucinations. As I had a head injury and was diagnosed with a concussion in 85 I was sent to a head injury clinic in 1990 five years after the accident. I don't think they knew I had been on prozac I did not think it a big deal and never did finish the bottle of pills. I had tests of course lots of them. Was put into a pain clinic and given amitriptyline which stopped the withdrawal but had many side effects. But I could sleep something I had not done in a very long time the pain lessened. My mother got cancer in 94 they switched my meds to Zoloft to help deal with this pressure as I was her main care giver she died in 96. I stopped zoloft in 96 had withdrawal was put on paxil went nutty quit it ct put on resperidol quit it ct had withdrawal was put on Effexor... 2years later celexa was added 20mg then increased to 40mg huge personality change went wild. Did too fast taper off Celexa 05 as I felt unwell for a long time prior... quit Effexor 150mg ct 07 found ****** 8 months into withdrawal learned some things was banned from there in 08 have kept learning since. there is really not enough room here to put my history but I have a lot of opinions about a lot of things especially any of the drugs mentioned above.
One thing I would like to add here is this tidbit ALL OPIATES INCREASE SEROTONIN it is not a huge jump to being in chronic pain to being put on an ssri/snri and opiates will affect your antidepressants and your thinking.

As I do not update much I will put my quit date Nov. 17 2007 I quit Effexor cold turkey. 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1096-introducing-myself-btdt/

There is a crack in everything ..That's how the light gets in :)

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 Faith, your brain is not dying, but you have to try and "focus". I know it's not easy, but you have to take one step at a time.   Have you printed the post that "Alto", requested.?    Stay strong.

Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014

 

                                                  Psych Drug - free since May 2014
.
         

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Faith, I have twins, Benjamin and Emily, now 2,5 years old. I will post some photos, but first I have to manage that they have less than 50 kb in other case they cant be posted. I understand you very well, I fight myself to get out of the grip of psychiatry. But please try to fight for your life, you can not change this medical negligence which caused you so much harm. You can fight yourself out of this. I still think that the brain can make new pathways and you could do very well. You have only to start doing something for you.

Martina, i am trying....my symptoms are inhuman, not a soul would live like this, i have been damaged too bad....even at the hospital the drs did not know what diagnoses to put anymore, they were out of them... My therapist would stay with me and cry seeing hoe...i couldn t talk i couldn t comunicate to her at all, just a little by putting my arms around my body...she was specializing in trauma and she said i had been traumatized before and after taking these poisons...she was crying with me and i made her promise she would help me kill myself...she was affraid I will end up in a mental institution...this is what these poisons have done along with people that were supposed to love and protect me

Please have patience and read : a great Mental Health Care System indeed/Never been hospitalized prior to starting meds

-Not sure all is accurate:2005 Diag. with major depression and anxiety after second birth

-switched AD,getting worse (maybe:Celexa, Effexor, Wellbutrin-diagnosed with bp

-Zyprexa, stopped it fast, got hosp.,Seroquel incr. at 300mg, wors. depr, akathisia bad,

-changed dr.,dropped Seroquel 300mg to 100mg !!!-

-new dr.got me off Seroquel in 1 mth at home!!Lamictal to help...getting worse,was also taking Clonazepam

-severe muscle twiches, dp/dr,neck and shoulder muscles tight straight like cement, psychotic, bedridden for 1yr

-Got put on Zoloft in the hosp.,and 3 mg of Clonazepam, "Stabilized" some after some months, 5-6,

-Came off Zoloft by dropping some weekly, not knowing better!debilitating symptoms, got back on, tried to reduce Clonazepam after research.Prof. Ashton; hosp., asked dr. to follow Dr Ashton, he dropped 3 mg Clon. in One day!put on much less Valium...hysterical,pain,rage,couldn t breathe,akathisia etc etc

-Zoloft up to 200mg!, hyperv. muscles tight like cement...my dr., on vacation!!Other dr red.zoloft, gave me Remeron

Current meds:Buspirone 20mg,Tegretol200mg,Trazadone 50 mg,Clonaz. 3mg,Escital.15mg,Propran.20mg,Bupropr.150mg,Baclofen30mg,Gabapentin200mg, taken 4 times/day in various comb

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I gave everybody all of me, all my love, all my patience, and they took and took and gave back selfishness and bitterness because that s what happens when you are too kind and too sensitive and obedient....they take away your soul your sanity your provacy your life they and bring you so down that nothing and anything can pull you up and then you go to the psychiatrists where the real horryf

Please have patience and read : a great Mental Health Care System indeed/Never been hospitalized prior to starting meds

-Not sure all is accurate:2005 Diag. with major depression and anxiety after second birth

-switched AD,getting worse (maybe:Celexa, Effexor, Wellbutrin-diagnosed with bp

-Zyprexa, stopped it fast, got hosp.,Seroquel incr. at 300mg, wors. depr, akathisia bad,

-changed dr.,dropped Seroquel 300mg to 100mg !!!-

-new dr.got me off Seroquel in 1 mth at home!!Lamictal to help...getting worse,was also taking Clonazepam

-severe muscle twiches, dp/dr,neck and shoulder muscles tight straight like cement, psychotic, bedridden for 1yr

-Got put on Zoloft in the hosp.,and 3 mg of Clonazepam, "Stabilized" some after some months, 5-6,

-Came off Zoloft by dropping some weekly, not knowing better!debilitating symptoms, got back on, tried to reduce Clonazepam after research.Prof. Ashton; hosp., asked dr. to follow Dr Ashton, he dropped 3 mg Clon. in One day!put on much less Valium...hysterical,pain,rage,couldn t breathe,akathisia etc etc

-Zoloft up to 200mg!, hyperv. muscles tight like cement...my dr., on vacation!!Other dr red.zoloft, gave me Remeron

Current meds:Buspirone 20mg,Tegretol200mg,Trazadone 50 mg,Clonaz. 3mg,Escital.15mg,Propran.20mg,Bupropr.150mg,Baclofen30mg,Gabapentin200mg, taken 4 times/day in various comb

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Sorry......

Horryfing trauma of your mind and body begins

God can t stop crying,

Please have patience and read : a great Mental Health Care System indeed/Never been hospitalized prior to starting meds

-Not sure all is accurate:2005 Diag. with major depression and anxiety after second birth

-switched AD,getting worse (maybe:Celexa, Effexor, Wellbutrin-diagnosed with bp

-Zyprexa, stopped it fast, got hosp.,Seroquel incr. at 300mg, wors. depr, akathisia bad,

-changed dr.,dropped Seroquel 300mg to 100mg !!!-

-new dr.got me off Seroquel in 1 mth at home!!Lamictal to help...getting worse,was also taking Clonazepam

-severe muscle twiches, dp/dr,neck and shoulder muscles tight straight like cement, psychotic, bedridden for 1yr

-Got put on Zoloft in the hosp.,and 3 mg of Clonazepam, "Stabilized" some after some months, 5-6,

-Came off Zoloft by dropping some weekly, not knowing better!debilitating symptoms, got back on, tried to reduce Clonazepam after research.Prof. Ashton; hosp., asked dr. to follow Dr Ashton, he dropped 3 mg Clon. in One day!put on much less Valium...hysterical,pain,rage,couldn t breathe,akathisia etc etc

-Zoloft up to 200mg!, hyperv. muscles tight like cement...my dr., on vacation!!Other dr red.zoloft, gave me Remeron

Current meds:Buspirone 20mg,Tegretol200mg,Trazadone 50 mg,Clonaz. 3mg,Escital.15mg,Propran.20mg,Bupropr.150mg,Baclofen30mg,Gabapentin200mg, taken 4 times/day in various comb

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Faith, can you tell us about your children, like how many, how old, what you love about them? Just tell us whatever helps, while you do exactly what Alto says. We will be witnesses to your courage and pain.

1st round Prozac 1989/90, clear depression symptoms. 2nd round Prozac started 1999 when admitted to dr. I was tired. Prozac pooped out, switch to Cymbalta 3/2006. Diagnosed with bipolar disorder due to mania 6/2006--then I was taken abruptly off Cymbalta and didn't know I had SSRI withdrawal. Lots of meds for my intractable "bipolar" symptoms.

Zyprexa started about 9/06, mostly 5mg. Tapered 4/12 through12/29/12

Wellbutrin. XL 300 mg started 1/07, tapered 1/18/13 through 7/8/13

Oxazepam mostly continuously since 6/06, 30mg since 12/12, tapered 1.17.14 through 8.26.15

11/06 Lithium 600mg twice daily, 2.2.14 400mg TID DIY liquid, 2.12.14 1150mg, 3.2.14 1100mg, 3.18.14 1075mg, 4/14 updose to 1100mg, 6.1.14 900 mg capsules 7.8.14 810mg, 8.17.14 725mg, 8.24.24 700mg...10.22.14 487.5mg, 3.9.15 475mg, 4.1.15 462.5mg 4.21.15 450mg 8.11.15 375mg, 11.28.15 362.5mg, back to 375mg four days later, 3.4.16 updose to 475 (too much going on to risk trouble)

9/4/13 Toprol-XL 25mg daily for sudden hypertension, tapered 11.12.13 through 5.3.14, last 10 days or so switched to atenolol

7.4.14 Started Walsh Protocol

56 years old

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Faith, your brain is not dying, but you have to try and "focus". I know it's not easy, but you have to take one step at a time.   Have you printed the post that "Alto", requested.?    Stay strong.

I have been taking one step at a time, moment by moment for yrs probably my dear,in bed maybe uncouncius or very lost and unable to speak physically, with my dear one staying near and blaming me that i did to myself, how can somebody be so cruel, see me down and disabled mind and body and be like full of venom...I have ruined his life, i have ruined my parent s life, all the blames of the world are on me..... This enemy really wants me and my family destroyed and he accomplished it.... I am a miracle being alive

Please have patience and read : a great Mental Health Care System indeed/Never been hospitalized prior to starting meds

-Not sure all is accurate:2005 Diag. with major depression and anxiety after second birth

-switched AD,getting worse (maybe:Celexa, Effexor, Wellbutrin-diagnosed with bp

-Zyprexa, stopped it fast, got hosp.,Seroquel incr. at 300mg, wors. depr, akathisia bad,

-changed dr.,dropped Seroquel 300mg to 100mg !!!-

-new dr.got me off Seroquel in 1 mth at home!!Lamictal to help...getting worse,was also taking Clonazepam

-severe muscle twiches, dp/dr,neck and shoulder muscles tight straight like cement, psychotic, bedridden for 1yr

-Got put on Zoloft in the hosp.,and 3 mg of Clonazepam, "Stabilized" some after some months, 5-6,

-Came off Zoloft by dropping some weekly, not knowing better!debilitating symptoms, got back on, tried to reduce Clonazepam after research.Prof. Ashton; hosp., asked dr. to follow Dr Ashton, he dropped 3 mg Clon. in One day!put on much less Valium...hysterical,pain,rage,couldn t breathe,akathisia etc etc

-Zoloft up to 200mg!, hyperv. muscles tight like cement...my dr., on vacation!!Other dr red.zoloft, gave me Remeron

Current meds:Buspirone 20mg,Tegretol200mg,Trazadone 50 mg,Clonaz. 3mg,Escital.15mg,Propran.20mg,Bupropr.150mg,Baclofen30mg,Gabapentin200mg, taken 4 times/day in various comb

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I can t write anymore, my brain and i think akathisia or whatever it is. My mind is broken up in fragments fragments and i get so stiff can t see well everything hurts

Love you all , I wish i could feel the love and no sadness no more pain no more

Please have patience and read : a great Mental Health Care System indeed/Never been hospitalized prior to starting meds

-Not sure all is accurate:2005 Diag. with major depression and anxiety after second birth

-switched AD,getting worse (maybe:Celexa, Effexor, Wellbutrin-diagnosed with bp

-Zyprexa, stopped it fast, got hosp.,Seroquel incr. at 300mg, wors. depr, akathisia bad,

-changed dr.,dropped Seroquel 300mg to 100mg !!!-

-new dr.got me off Seroquel in 1 mth at home!!Lamictal to help...getting worse,was also taking Clonazepam

-severe muscle twiches, dp/dr,neck and shoulder muscles tight straight like cement, psychotic, bedridden for 1yr

-Got put on Zoloft in the hosp.,and 3 mg of Clonazepam, "Stabilized" some after some months, 5-6,

-Came off Zoloft by dropping some weekly, not knowing better!debilitating symptoms, got back on, tried to reduce Clonazepam after research.Prof. Ashton; hosp., asked dr. to follow Dr Ashton, he dropped 3 mg Clon. in One day!put on much less Valium...hysterical,pain,rage,couldn t breathe,akathisia etc etc

-Zoloft up to 200mg!, hyperv. muscles tight like cement...my dr., on vacation!!Other dr red.zoloft, gave me Remeron

Current meds:Buspirone 20mg,Tegretol200mg,Trazadone 50 mg,Clonaz. 3mg,Escital.15mg,Propran.20mg,Bupropr.150mg,Baclofen30mg,Gabapentin200mg, taken 4 times/day in various comb

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  I , too have been taking one step at a time. I didn't mean to be "condescending", just hopeful and helpful.  I've also been doing this for years, so I feel that I understand, the pain.  Sorry if you misunderstood my intention.  I can "feel" your pain, and commiserate., entirely.  I tend to be "scattered", in withdrawal, and noticed that you "seemed" to be as well.  I was just trying to help.  I'm sorry if you took this the "wrong" way.  I'm hoping you feel better, soon.

Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014

 

                                                  Psych Drug - free since May 2014
.
         

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Alig forgive me, my understanding or misunderstanding of things is very very bad!!!!!!!! I am sorry, you are trying to be so kind and helpful and you are!! Is just my mind is very out of control, like"racing ". You are very kind , i am misunderstanding everything. My thinking is very broken and poor, cannot process data well. It feels so good when i see your pretty avatar look on my thread, but making sense of what people tell is very hard, i am not in my right mind

So please bear with me and my very troubled mind

Love and hugs, Faith

Please have patience and read : a great Mental Health Care System indeed/Never been hospitalized prior to starting meds

-Not sure all is accurate:2005 Diag. with major depression and anxiety after second birth

-switched AD,getting worse (maybe:Celexa, Effexor, Wellbutrin-diagnosed with bp

-Zyprexa, stopped it fast, got hosp.,Seroquel incr. at 300mg, wors. depr, akathisia bad,

-changed dr.,dropped Seroquel 300mg to 100mg !!!-

-new dr.got me off Seroquel in 1 mth at home!!Lamictal to help...getting worse,was also taking Clonazepam

-severe muscle twiches, dp/dr,neck and shoulder muscles tight straight like cement, psychotic, bedridden for 1yr

-Got put on Zoloft in the hosp.,and 3 mg of Clonazepam, "Stabilized" some after some months, 5-6,

-Came off Zoloft by dropping some weekly, not knowing better!debilitating symptoms, got back on, tried to reduce Clonazepam after research.Prof. Ashton; hosp., asked dr. to follow Dr Ashton, he dropped 3 mg Clon. in One day!put on much less Valium...hysterical,pain,rage,couldn t breathe,akathisia etc etc

-Zoloft up to 200mg!, hyperv. muscles tight like cement...my dr., on vacation!!Other dr red.zoloft, gave me Remeron

Current meds:Buspirone 20mg,Tegretol200mg,Trazadone 50 mg,Clonaz. 3mg,Escital.15mg,Propran.20mg,Bupropr.150mg,Baclofen30mg,Gabapentin200mg, taken 4 times/day in various comb

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   I understand, Faith. This is very hard. You are going through a particularly "hard patch ". You will "get through".  I feel the same as you - It's a miracle , I'm alive. Be "selfish", and look after yourself. This is "the fight of your life".

Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014

 

                                                  Psych Drug - free since May 2014
.
         

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Akathisia mind and body! Out of my mind . How would I know if inam delusional versus delirious versus psychotic . I feel crazy.can t stop moving my body. Out of touch with reality i onow it....

Please have patience and read : a great Mental Health Care System indeed/Never been hospitalized prior to starting meds

-Not sure all is accurate:2005 Diag. with major depression and anxiety after second birth

-switched AD,getting worse (maybe:Celexa, Effexor, Wellbutrin-diagnosed with bp

-Zyprexa, stopped it fast, got hosp.,Seroquel incr. at 300mg, wors. depr, akathisia bad,

-changed dr.,dropped Seroquel 300mg to 100mg !!!-

-new dr.got me off Seroquel in 1 mth at home!!Lamictal to help...getting worse,was also taking Clonazepam

-severe muscle twiches, dp/dr,neck and shoulder muscles tight straight like cement, psychotic, bedridden for 1yr

-Got put on Zoloft in the hosp.,and 3 mg of Clonazepam, "Stabilized" some after some months, 5-6,

-Came off Zoloft by dropping some weekly, not knowing better!debilitating symptoms, got back on, tried to reduce Clonazepam after research.Prof. Ashton; hosp., asked dr. to follow Dr Ashton, he dropped 3 mg Clon. in One day!put on much less Valium...hysterical,pain,rage,couldn t breathe,akathisia etc etc

-Zoloft up to 200mg!, hyperv. muscles tight like cement...my dr., on vacation!!Other dr red.zoloft, gave me Remeron

Current meds:Buspirone 20mg,Tegretol200mg,Trazadone 50 mg,Clonaz. 3mg,Escital.15mg,Propran.20mg,Bupropr.150mg,Baclofen30mg,Gabapentin200mg, taken 4 times/day in various comb

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A rose by any other name is still a rose.. whatever it is you know how to handle it as  i know your not new... I hope things improve for you however you got this far it has been under your own steam you know it and I know it...

 

you got some survival skills or you would not have made it this far... :) 

 

That does not mean keeping an eye open for other things that may improve the situation is not worth doing have you checked the symptoms and self care section... if I said this before excuse me...lol i am old and my memory fails me lol not that old but my memory does suck 

 

I wish you peace

WARNING THIS WILL BE LONG
Had a car accident in 85
Codeine was the pain med when I was release from hosp continuous use till 89
Given PROZAC by a specialist to help with nerve pain in my leg 89-90 not sure which year
Was not told a thing about it being a psych med thought it was a pain killer no info about psych side effects I went nuts had hallucinations. As I had a head injury and was diagnosed with a concussion in 85 I was sent to a head injury clinic in 1990 five years after the accident. I don't think they knew I had been on prozac I did not think it a big deal and never did finish the bottle of pills. I had tests of course lots of them. Was put into a pain clinic and given amitriptyline which stopped the withdrawal but had many side effects. But I could sleep something I had not done in a very long time the pain lessened. My mother got cancer in 94 they switched my meds to Zoloft to help deal with this pressure as I was her main care giver she died in 96. I stopped zoloft in 96 had withdrawal was put on paxil went nutty quit it ct put on resperidol quit it ct had withdrawal was put on Effexor... 2years later celexa was added 20mg then increased to 40mg huge personality change went wild. Did too fast taper off Celexa 05 as I felt unwell for a long time prior... quit Effexor 150mg ct 07 found ****** 8 months into withdrawal learned some things was banned from there in 08 have kept learning since. there is really not enough room here to put my history but I have a lot of opinions about a lot of things especially any of the drugs mentioned above.
One thing I would like to add here is this tidbit ALL OPIATES INCREASE SEROTONIN it is not a huge jump to being in chronic pain to being put on an ssri/snri and opiates will affect your antidepressants and your thinking.

As I do not update much I will put my quit date Nov. 17 2007 I quit Effexor cold turkey. 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1096-introducing-myself-btdt/

There is a crack in everything ..That's how the light gets in :)

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Inch by inch life's a cinch yard by yard life is hard... 

 

one of my old teachers taught me that... power of education eh? lol was a nice guy

WARNING THIS WILL BE LONG
Had a car accident in 85
Codeine was the pain med when I was release from hosp continuous use till 89
Given PROZAC by a specialist to help with nerve pain in my leg 89-90 not sure which year
Was not told a thing about it being a psych med thought it was a pain killer no info about psych side effects I went nuts had hallucinations. As I had a head injury and was diagnosed with a concussion in 85 I was sent to a head injury clinic in 1990 five years after the accident. I don't think they knew I had been on prozac I did not think it a big deal and never did finish the bottle of pills. I had tests of course lots of them. Was put into a pain clinic and given amitriptyline which stopped the withdrawal but had many side effects. But I could sleep something I had not done in a very long time the pain lessened. My mother got cancer in 94 they switched my meds to Zoloft to help deal with this pressure as I was her main care giver she died in 96. I stopped zoloft in 96 had withdrawal was put on paxil went nutty quit it ct put on resperidol quit it ct had withdrawal was put on Effexor... 2years later celexa was added 20mg then increased to 40mg huge personality change went wild. Did too fast taper off Celexa 05 as I felt unwell for a long time prior... quit Effexor 150mg ct 07 found ****** 8 months into withdrawal learned some things was banned from there in 08 have kept learning since. there is really not enough room here to put my history but I have a lot of opinions about a lot of things especially any of the drugs mentioned above.
One thing I would like to add here is this tidbit ALL OPIATES INCREASE SEROTONIN it is not a huge jump to being in chronic pain to being put on an ssri/snri and opiates will affect your antidepressants and your thinking.

As I do not update much I will put my quit date Nov. 17 2007 I quit Effexor cold turkey. 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1096-introducing-myself-btdt/

There is a crack in everything ..That's how the light gets in :)

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  • Administrator

How is your current state different from your usual symptom pattern?

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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I don t Alto, I think worse, much more tired, aggressive, irritable, neck twiches really bad my head, akathisia it is almost imposible to compare because i do not remember, i think i am much worse.........

Please have patience and read : a great Mental Health Care System indeed/Never been hospitalized prior to starting meds

-Not sure all is accurate:2005 Diag. with major depression and anxiety after second birth

-switched AD,getting worse (maybe:Celexa, Effexor, Wellbutrin-diagnosed with bp

-Zyprexa, stopped it fast, got hosp.,Seroquel incr. at 300mg, wors. depr, akathisia bad,

-changed dr.,dropped Seroquel 300mg to 100mg !!!-

-new dr.got me off Seroquel in 1 mth at home!!Lamictal to help...getting worse,was also taking Clonazepam

-severe muscle twiches, dp/dr,neck and shoulder muscles tight straight like cement, psychotic, bedridden for 1yr

-Got put on Zoloft in the hosp.,and 3 mg of Clonazepam, "Stabilized" some after some months, 5-6,

-Came off Zoloft by dropping some weekly, not knowing better!debilitating symptoms, got back on, tried to reduce Clonazepam after research.Prof. Ashton; hosp., asked dr. to follow Dr Ashton, he dropped 3 mg Clon. in One day!put on much less Valium...hysterical,pain,rage,couldn t breathe,akathisia etc etc

-Zoloft up to 200mg!, hyperv. muscles tight like cement...my dr., on vacation!!Other dr red.zoloft, gave me Remeron

Current meds:Buspirone 20mg,Tegretol200mg,Trazadone 50 mg,Clonaz. 3mg,Escital.15mg,Propran.20mg,Bupropr.150mg,Baclofen30mg,Gabapentin200mg, taken 4 times/day in various comb

Link to comment

Do you see anything you did different today that may have made it worse or is this from going down a very low bit of one drug... what do you think... your the only one who knows this so try to think it threw... best you can take your time. This is important to know what to do next. 

WARNING THIS WILL BE LONG
Had a car accident in 85
Codeine was the pain med when I was release from hosp continuous use till 89
Given PROZAC by a specialist to help with nerve pain in my leg 89-90 not sure which year
Was not told a thing about it being a psych med thought it was a pain killer no info about psych side effects I went nuts had hallucinations. As I had a head injury and was diagnosed with a concussion in 85 I was sent to a head injury clinic in 1990 five years after the accident. I don't think they knew I had been on prozac I did not think it a big deal and never did finish the bottle of pills. I had tests of course lots of them. Was put into a pain clinic and given amitriptyline which stopped the withdrawal but had many side effects. But I could sleep something I had not done in a very long time the pain lessened. My mother got cancer in 94 they switched my meds to Zoloft to help deal with this pressure as I was her main care giver she died in 96. I stopped zoloft in 96 had withdrawal was put on paxil went nutty quit it ct put on resperidol quit it ct had withdrawal was put on Effexor... 2years later celexa was added 20mg then increased to 40mg huge personality change went wild. Did too fast taper off Celexa 05 as I felt unwell for a long time prior... quit Effexor 150mg ct 07 found ****** 8 months into withdrawal learned some things was banned from there in 08 have kept learning since. there is really not enough room here to put my history but I have a lot of opinions about a lot of things especially any of the drugs mentioned above.
One thing I would like to add here is this tidbit ALL OPIATES INCREASE SEROTONIN it is not a huge jump to being in chronic pain to being put on an ssri/snri and opiates will affect your antidepressants and your thinking.

As I do not update much I will put my quit date Nov. 17 2007 I quit Effexor cold turkey. 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1096-introducing-myself-btdt/

There is a crack in everything ..That's how the light gets in :)

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  • Administrator

Well, Faith, you will have to judge this for yourself. Of all your 8 drugs, did reducing the Buspar a tiny bit really make a difference in your symptom pattern?

 

As btdt said, you need to think carefully and responsibly about reporting your symptoms.

 

If you can't reduce any of your drugs, you will either have to live with them making you ill or go to the hospital and let those doctors make decisions for you. There's no one here who can work a miracle for you.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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I think it might be the drug as well...plus all the other drugs plus my protrected withdrawals . I did not ask for miracles here Altostrata.. .. I needed support for my hell, i can leave the site if i am a bother and it is too hard to deal with me... I am still in severe protracted withdrawal and God knows what these meds are doong to me, I am in Hell Altostrata maybe i am too screed up for anybody to deal with me.. .. If you would like me to leave the site I will not bother anybody, i am not doing anything on purpose It is judt a desperate situatiom and my system is very very sensitive to any change

So sorry to bother anybody... The thing is that there is a bunch of black hystory to me and my horific withdrawals and drug reactions that i don t remember to tell it to you........and that i think would matter greatly

Thank you for your patience and care, i hope you do care about me by now

My mind is not right, i hope you now that i am suffering beyond any wordsthere is no way to describe it

Yes i am feeling every change and it is not my fault

Faith

Please have patience and read : a great Mental Health Care System indeed/Never been hospitalized prior to starting meds

-Not sure all is accurate:2005 Diag. with major depression and anxiety after second birth

-switched AD,getting worse (maybe:Celexa, Effexor, Wellbutrin-diagnosed with bp

-Zyprexa, stopped it fast, got hosp.,Seroquel incr. at 300mg, wors. depr, akathisia bad,

-changed dr.,dropped Seroquel 300mg to 100mg !!!-

-new dr.got me off Seroquel in 1 mth at home!!Lamictal to help...getting worse,was also taking Clonazepam

-severe muscle twiches, dp/dr,neck and shoulder muscles tight straight like cement, psychotic, bedridden for 1yr

-Got put on Zoloft in the hosp.,and 3 mg of Clonazepam, "Stabilized" some after some months, 5-6,

-Came off Zoloft by dropping some weekly, not knowing better!debilitating symptoms, got back on, tried to reduce Clonazepam after research.Prof. Ashton; hosp., asked dr. to follow Dr Ashton, he dropped 3 mg Clon. in One day!put on much less Valium...hysterical,pain,rage,couldn t breathe,akathisia etc etc

-Zoloft up to 200mg!, hyperv. muscles tight like cement...my dr., on vacation!!Other dr red.zoloft, gave me Remeron

Current meds:Buspirone 20mg,Tegretol200mg,Trazadone 50 mg,Clonaz. 3mg,Escital.15mg,Propran.20mg,Bupropr.150mg,Baclofen30mg,Gabapentin200mg, taken 4 times/day in various comb

Link to comment
  • Administrator

You are taking too many drugs. Whether you also have withdrawal syndrome or anything else, it's impossible to say.

 

If I were you, I'd keep on with the reduced evening buspirone. Be careful to take all your drugs very consistently.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

Link to comment

I am not sure but if your feeling very changed you will not be wanting to go any lower just now just hold... I am not the expert here this is just what I think... if I am wrong somebody will correct me... for sure. i did not see anyone asking you too leave.. try to take it easy and yes we know it is not your fault. 

peace

WARNING THIS WILL BE LONG
Had a car accident in 85
Codeine was the pain med when I was release from hosp continuous use till 89
Given PROZAC by a specialist to help with nerve pain in my leg 89-90 not sure which year
Was not told a thing about it being a psych med thought it was a pain killer no info about psych side effects I went nuts had hallucinations. As I had a head injury and was diagnosed with a concussion in 85 I was sent to a head injury clinic in 1990 five years after the accident. I don't think they knew I had been on prozac I did not think it a big deal and never did finish the bottle of pills. I had tests of course lots of them. Was put into a pain clinic and given amitriptyline which stopped the withdrawal but had many side effects. But I could sleep something I had not done in a very long time the pain lessened. My mother got cancer in 94 they switched my meds to Zoloft to help deal with this pressure as I was her main care giver she died in 96. I stopped zoloft in 96 had withdrawal was put on paxil went nutty quit it ct put on resperidol quit it ct had withdrawal was put on Effexor... 2years later celexa was added 20mg then increased to 40mg huge personality change went wild. Did too fast taper off Celexa 05 as I felt unwell for a long time prior... quit Effexor 150mg ct 07 found ****** 8 months into withdrawal learned some things was banned from there in 08 have kept learning since. there is really not enough room here to put my history but I have a lot of opinions about a lot of things especially any of the drugs mentioned above.
One thing I would like to add here is this tidbit ALL OPIATES INCREASE SEROTONIN it is not a huge jump to being in chronic pain to being put on an ssri/snri and opiates will affect your antidepressants and your thinking.

As I do not update much I will put my quit date Nov. 17 2007 I quit Effexor cold turkey. 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1096-introducing-myself-btdt/

There is a crack in everything ..That's how the light gets in :)

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus

Faith,

 

Alto didn't ask you to leave or say you were bothering her. She stated the limitations of what we can do to support you. In my view being as clear as possible about this is the most ethical thing we can do.

 

This site favours very conservative tapering as the key mechanism to reduce our drug burden. If that strategy is not an option for you due to your sensitivities then your other options are to stay on your current medications or seek help elsewhere which is likely to be a hospital.

 

We care about everyone on this site. We care enough to be clear about our limits. If psychiatric medicine was like thus most of us wouldn't be in this mess.

 

As always, it's your decision in terms of what you are going to do from here.

 

Dalsaan

Please note - I am not a medical practitioner and I do not give medical advice. I offer an opinion based on my own experiences, reading and discussion with others.On Effexor for 2 months at the start of 2005. Had extreme insomnia as an adverse reaction. Changed to mirtazapine. Have been trying to get off since mid 2008 with numerous failures including CTs and slow (but not slow enough tapers)Have slow tapered at 10 per cent or less for years. I have liquid mirtazapine made at a compounding chemist.

Was on 1.6 ml as at 19 March 2014.

Dropped to 1.5 ml 7 June 2014. Dropped to 1.4 in about September.

Dropped to 1.3 on 20 December 2014. Dropped to 1.2 in mid Jan 2015.

Dropped to 1 ml in late Feb 2015. I think my old medication had run out of puff so I tried 1ml when I got the new stuff and it seems to be going ok. Sleep has been good over the last week (as of 13/3/15).

Dropped to 1/2 ml 14/11/15 Fatigue still there as are memory and cognition problems. Sleep is patchy but liveable compared to what it has been in the past.

 

DRUG FREE - as at 1st May 2017

 

>My intro post is here - http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/2250-dalsaan

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Faith, I'm Hoping you find a way through your mess of meds. Others have done it, you can too.

 

Wishing you peace, healing and the ability to keep putting one foot in front of the other.

2001-04 Polypharmacy to include Paxil,Celexa, Risperdal, Seroquel, Depakote, Ambien, Geodon, Valium, Ativan, Haldol

03/04-11/04 Abilify

11/04-05/07 CT Abilify Non symptomatic

6/07 took Valium, began to experience altered reality and physical symptoms of withdrawal from Valium.

07/08. Abilify 2 mg, 12/08 Abilify 1 mg, 03/09 Abilify 0 mg, 03/08-06/11Altered reality but fully functional

10/12 hospitalized, Invega Depot, 2 shots discontinued, severe insomnia

6/14-10/14 flexeril, discontinued, developed insomnia; 10/14 10 mg Doxepin I week, no help with insomnia; 10/14 Remeron for two days, paradoxical reaction

Present Risperdal 1mg, clonazepam 2 mg, Restoril 15 mg. Went from .5 to 1 to 1.5 to 2mg of clonazepam in 2014. Also in 2014, tapered from 2 mg risperdal to 1.5 (fairly slowly but still too fast) and had to up dose back to 2 mg. Got liquid risperdal and started from 2 mg again.

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Faith,

 

Alto didn't ask you to leave or say you were bothering her. She stated the limitations of what we can do to support you. In my view being as clear as possible about this is the most ethical thing we can do.

 

This site favours very conservative tapering as the key mechanism to reduce our drug burden. If that strategy is not an option for you due to your sensitivities then your other options are to stay on your current medications or seek help elsewhere which is likely to be a hospital.

 

We care about everyone on this site. We care enough to be clear about our limits. If psychiatric medicine was like thus most of us wouldn't be in this mess.

 

As always, it's your decision in terms of what you are going to do from here.

 

Dalsaan

A very clear and truthful. 

Great post. 

 

I know it is awful to think your losing support when you finally get to a place where there is a glimmer of hope but the truth is the best way to go..and everything she said to you in this post is the truth.  I know you don't want to leave so don't just carry on as you have been and wait this out in time it will get better and you can go from there. It is easy to feel sensitive to comments when you already feel like crap and it may seem insensitive to you but really this is the fair and decent way of doing this. 

 

It is not fair your in this situation by no means should this ever have happened and just like all the rest of us your caught in a trap this is the only way out that we know and we will hold your hand through it but the real work and all the choices are yours here we do support.. and education the best we can. 

 

I wish you peace

WARNING THIS WILL BE LONG
Had a car accident in 85
Codeine was the pain med when I was release from hosp continuous use till 89
Given PROZAC by a specialist to help with nerve pain in my leg 89-90 not sure which year
Was not told a thing about it being a psych med thought it was a pain killer no info about psych side effects I went nuts had hallucinations. As I had a head injury and was diagnosed with a concussion in 85 I was sent to a head injury clinic in 1990 five years after the accident. I don't think they knew I had been on prozac I did not think it a big deal and never did finish the bottle of pills. I had tests of course lots of them. Was put into a pain clinic and given amitriptyline which stopped the withdrawal but had many side effects. But I could sleep something I had not done in a very long time the pain lessened. My mother got cancer in 94 they switched my meds to Zoloft to help deal with this pressure as I was her main care giver she died in 96. I stopped zoloft in 96 had withdrawal was put on paxil went nutty quit it ct put on resperidol quit it ct had withdrawal was put on Effexor... 2years later celexa was added 20mg then increased to 40mg huge personality change went wild. Did too fast taper off Celexa 05 as I felt unwell for a long time prior... quit Effexor 150mg ct 07 found ****** 8 months into withdrawal learned some things was banned from there in 08 have kept learning since. there is really not enough room here to put my history but I have a lot of opinions about a lot of things especially any of the drugs mentioned above.
One thing I would like to add here is this tidbit ALL OPIATES INCREASE SEROTONIN it is not a huge jump to being in chronic pain to being put on an ssri/snri and opiates will affect your antidepressants and your thinking.

As I do not update much I will put my quit date Nov. 17 2007 I quit Effexor cold turkey. 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1096-introducing-myself-btdt/

There is a crack in everything ..That's how the light gets in :)

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