Marta Posted August 5, 2021 Author Share Posted August 5, 2021 Update. Today i am even worse I need to write this, forcing down food and water. I also indulged myself in reading the horror stories from pssd forums. Now i think i am permanently damaged too. I am 8weeks in this hell from a nice 5+ months long window were i had 0 syntmoms. I think it was just the last effort from my brain before giving up. 😣 06/2012 - 02/2015 CIPRALEX 10 mg (for somatic abdominal pain + reflux) - prior to this NOT any significant episode of anxiety/depression on medication: emotional-sexual numbness, total inability to cry, +8 kg, fatigue -> abdominal pain gone 02/2015 - 1/04/2015 tapering from 10 mg to 0 mg doctor advised 05/05/2015 huge anxiety, burning skin sensation, panic, fear, not able to cry again, never-had-before insomnia, totally lost appetite, little loss of vision in one eye, sweating, chest pain, short breath, restlessness, accelerated heartbeat, mild akathisia legs-feet 30/05/2015 reinstated 8mg (I was suggested 5 mg here) middle 07/2015 general improving 10/2015 start disastrous too long taper 7mg 11/2015 6mg 12/2015 5mg 1/2016 4mg 2/2016 4mg 3/2016 3mg ->FAIL back to 4mg .... 8/2016 3mg 8/2017 2mg (short wave in summer '17) 8/2018 2mg stable 8/2019 1mg 1/2020 0.6 mg 1/APRIL/2020 0mg FREE! 7/2020 - 10/2020 MILD WAVE(mostly anxiety, poor sleep) 6/2021 - 9/2021 WAVE (anxiety, severe insomnia, total loss of appetite, deep depression, internal restlessness, anhedonia) 0.125g triazolam 2 times 18/03/2022 WAVE (anxiety, severe insomnia, total loss of appetite, PAIN in muscles and nerves, arms and right leg,cannot exercise,hard to walk) 0.125g triazolam 3 times 7/5 rein 0.1mg Link to comment
Mentor Hanna72 Posted August 5, 2021 Mentor Share Posted August 5, 2021 Hi @Marta I am so sorry to hear about your suffering. I too did really good for few months after stopping my drug and then at about 8 months out, boom severe crash. It’s really heartbreaking and gets us all confused and scared. This is such a cruel existence and I am truly sorry you have to go through this. If I were you I would avoid reading horror stories, it only messes with our already fear and feeds it. Is there is anyway you can distract with something positive like reading or listening to a beautiful story or watching something uplifting on tv just to give your mind a rest from fearful thoughts. Are you able to take a gentle walk outside. It does wonders for our brain and builds up stronger nervous system. You are 13 months off, that’s a huge accomplishment, don’t give up, hang in there, I know it’s easier said then done and don’t forget that our bodies are remarkably designed to help us heal. My thoughts and prayers are with you, I will be rooting for you🙏 1999-2020 20 mg Paxil Bridged with Fluoxetine to help me get off Paxil. 2022 Fluoxetine 15 mg 12/12 14mg 27/12 13mg jan 12mg feb 11mg mars 10mg, 9 mg 8,5 mg 7.6mg 7.0 mg 6,3 mg 5,6 mg 5,0 mg 4,5 mg 4,0 mg 3.6mg 3,2 mg 2,9 mg 2,6 mg 2,3 mg 2,0 mg 1.8 mg I am not a medical professional nor is this a medical advice. I only talk from my own experience. Link to comment
Mentor Greatful Posted August 5, 2021 Mentor Share Posted August 5, 2021 @Marta 2 hours ago, Marta said: I also indulged myself in reading the horror stories from pssd forums. Now i think i am permanently damaged too. Please do not read anything that will hinder you recovery. Read the success stories. Reach out to the ones who are healing and who have healed. kenA is a good thread. He hasn't written his success story yet but it very close. He has very quick to respond back and will give great advice. Anything negative will darken your thoughts, and pull you down further. You are not thinking with a brain that is working right at this time. Besides that then would mean I might as well through in the towel. I am trying to stabilize before tapering off my drugs and I have been on drugs for over 20 years. Science has proven that our brain do heal I think you will find this to be a good read. It is about a woman recovering from a benzo Atro equates it to any drug that has altered your brain Click on the title and it should open up My heart goes out to you❤️ https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/24894-greatful-is-this-withdrawal-or-to-many-med-changes-at-once/ 1995? Prozac, tried several Paxil, Serzone, St John's Wart back to Prozac and Trazodone ct:d Traz Lexapro. Tried to stop Crash in 2015 Kindled Hospitalized, Vybrid, Seroquel, Effexor, Abilify Pristiq, Wellbutrin-- 2016 ended back on Prozac and Lamictal 200mg 5/2020 thru 12/2020 taper from 20mg Prozac down to 3mg. Crashed 12/13/2020 Zoloft 50mg 1/29ct 1/29/2021 Seroquel 50mg ct 2/12/2021 Wellbutrin 75mg. Became hypo manic 2/1 6ct Trazodone 50mg 4/25 25mg 2/5/ 2021 Lamictal 150mg. 2/24 100mg 4/9 75mg 4/21 37.5 2/16/2021 Seroquel 50xr 3/3 100mg 3/17 150mg side effects ct 4/3 2021 Lexapro 5mg 4/14 7.5mg 4/30 10mg 5/10 7.5mg 2021/ 5/16 5mg Lexapro 37.5 Lamictal 25mg trazadone, xanax .0625mg 3x a day Lexapro Taper> Sept/01/2021 4.90mg> Sept/25 4.75mg> Oct/19 4.69mg > Nov/14 4.2mg Jan/30/2022-- Split dosing 2x a day All liquid 4.2mg (2.20mg at 8am & 2mg at 4pm) 2/17 4mg> 2/24 3.8mg slow taper to Aug/12/2022 2.04mg 2023> 2mg, 1.90mg, 1.80mg, 1.70mg, 1.5mg, 1.4mg, 1.3mg 1.2mg, 1.1mg, 1mg, 0.9mg, 0.8mg, 0.7mg 0.65mg, 0.6mg, 0.55mg, 0.5mg, 0.45mg, 0.4mg, 0.35mg, 0.3mg, 0.25,mg, back to once a day dosing 0 .1mg, 0.07mg , 0.05mg 4/1/2024 0 Lamictal taper 4/17/ 2022 25mg, 9/9/ 22 -20mg, 9/25/22- 15mg , 10/20/22- 0 Trazodone..2023.>down to 14mg, 7mg, 6mg July 2023 0 Xanax 0.0625 3 x a day, 2023> 0.042 3x a day Supplements Magnesium glycinate, Omega 3, D3, vitamin c , zinc, NAC Link to comment
Marta Posted August 7, 2021 Author Share Posted August 7, 2021 @Hanna72 it's so cruel yes. After so many months it's crazy! Hard to explain even to myself. I really thought the first days is something else, some sickness but no, this state is so "familiar" and disgusting. It's like a time machine back to my previous doctor adviced fast taper. Stuck there. Many thanks for your kind words and reminders ❤️ 06/2012 - 02/2015 CIPRALEX 10 mg (for somatic abdominal pain + reflux) - prior to this NOT any significant episode of anxiety/depression on medication: emotional-sexual numbness, total inability to cry, +8 kg, fatigue -> abdominal pain gone 02/2015 - 1/04/2015 tapering from 10 mg to 0 mg doctor advised 05/05/2015 huge anxiety, burning skin sensation, panic, fear, not able to cry again, never-had-before insomnia, totally lost appetite, little loss of vision in one eye, sweating, chest pain, short breath, restlessness, accelerated heartbeat, mild akathisia legs-feet 30/05/2015 reinstated 8mg (I was suggested 5 mg here) middle 07/2015 general improving 10/2015 start disastrous too long taper 7mg 11/2015 6mg 12/2015 5mg 1/2016 4mg 2/2016 4mg 3/2016 3mg ->FAIL back to 4mg .... 8/2016 3mg 8/2017 2mg (short wave in summer '17) 8/2018 2mg stable 8/2019 1mg 1/2020 0.6 mg 1/APRIL/2020 0mg FREE! 7/2020 - 10/2020 MILD WAVE(mostly anxiety, poor sleep) 6/2021 - 9/2021 WAVE (anxiety, severe insomnia, total loss of appetite, deep depression, internal restlessness, anhedonia) 0.125g triazolam 2 times 18/03/2022 WAVE (anxiety, severe insomnia, total loss of appetite, PAIN in muscles and nerves, arms and right leg,cannot exercise,hard to walk) 0.125g triazolam 3 times 7/5 rein 0.1mg Link to comment
Marta Posted August 7, 2021 Author Share Posted August 7, 2021 @Gratefulas always many thanks. The answers means a lot for me. Yes you are right. I was also thinking, that i should stop to continuously ask myself if i am enjoying my previous hobbies, if i love my boyfriend, if i can laugh at funny video because I can hardly swallow the food,the anxiety peaks leave me often breathless,every morning is hell on earth and the sleep is still so fragile, i am still in the survival mode and i wish too much from my state (i hope i explained it in a clear way, my English used to be much better than this). The thing you sent me to read was very nice. I read it all in one round. I cannot imagine how much my brain had been altered in so many years... I remember when i was tapering the times i was stabilizing i too got some weeks of this full synthoms waves. It's 99% a bad thing but i know but 1% also a good thing because when you will be off (of course I wish so much it will go all smooth, really 🙏🏻) wd could hit (also very late as you see from me) and you will automatically remember that you felt like this back then and at least you validate your own state. I don't know if it makes sense. Thanks again with my heart. 06/2012 - 02/2015 CIPRALEX 10 mg (for somatic abdominal pain + reflux) - prior to this NOT any significant episode of anxiety/depression on medication: emotional-sexual numbness, total inability to cry, +8 kg, fatigue -> abdominal pain gone 02/2015 - 1/04/2015 tapering from 10 mg to 0 mg doctor advised 05/05/2015 huge anxiety, burning skin sensation, panic, fear, not able to cry again, never-had-before insomnia, totally lost appetite, little loss of vision in one eye, sweating, chest pain, short breath, restlessness, accelerated heartbeat, mild akathisia legs-feet 30/05/2015 reinstated 8mg (I was suggested 5 mg here) middle 07/2015 general improving 10/2015 start disastrous too long taper 7mg 11/2015 6mg 12/2015 5mg 1/2016 4mg 2/2016 4mg 3/2016 3mg ->FAIL back to 4mg .... 8/2016 3mg 8/2017 2mg (short wave in summer '17) 8/2018 2mg stable 8/2019 1mg 1/2020 0.6 mg 1/APRIL/2020 0mg FREE! 7/2020 - 10/2020 MILD WAVE(mostly anxiety, poor sleep) 6/2021 - 9/2021 WAVE (anxiety, severe insomnia, total loss of appetite, deep depression, internal restlessness, anhedonia) 0.125g triazolam 2 times 18/03/2022 WAVE (anxiety, severe insomnia, total loss of appetite, PAIN in muscles and nerves, arms and right leg,cannot exercise,hard to walk) 0.125g triazolam 3 times 7/5 rein 0.1mg Link to comment
Marta Posted August 13, 2021 Author Share Posted August 13, 2021 Small update (mostly for myself). I had some VERY SMALL improvements in appetite. I had also some good feelings that lasted no more than one/two seconds. Nothing else. Then everything back in the deep wave, so sad. I just wanted to list all my symptoms for these 2+ months for my story,in order of severity. Insomnia/restlessness/loss of sensitivity in the skin (for few weeks,now better) Loss of appetite Tight stomach Dread and anguish Morning anxiety Depression Fatigue, exhaustion just for being alive Loss of libido (but I say to myself it's obvious in this bad state) Loss of good emotions, anhedonia Aches in the chest (also randomly all around the body) Difficulty urinating Messed up stomach Severe acne (never had in 35 years!) Sensation of messed up heartbit Intolerance to heat Metallic taste ...a funny one is that my calligraphy totally changed, maybe because of the tension due to anxiety 06/2012 - 02/2015 CIPRALEX 10 mg (for somatic abdominal pain + reflux) - prior to this NOT any significant episode of anxiety/depression on medication: emotional-sexual numbness, total inability to cry, +8 kg, fatigue -> abdominal pain gone 02/2015 - 1/04/2015 tapering from 10 mg to 0 mg doctor advised 05/05/2015 huge anxiety, burning skin sensation, panic, fear, not able to cry again, never-had-before insomnia, totally lost appetite, little loss of vision in one eye, sweating, chest pain, short breath, restlessness, accelerated heartbeat, mild akathisia legs-feet 30/05/2015 reinstated 8mg (I was suggested 5 mg here) middle 07/2015 general improving 10/2015 start disastrous too long taper 7mg 11/2015 6mg 12/2015 5mg 1/2016 4mg 2/2016 4mg 3/2016 3mg ->FAIL back to 4mg .... 8/2016 3mg 8/2017 2mg (short wave in summer '17) 8/2018 2mg stable 8/2019 1mg 1/2020 0.6 mg 1/APRIL/2020 0mg FREE! 7/2020 - 10/2020 MILD WAVE(mostly anxiety, poor sleep) 6/2021 - 9/2021 WAVE (anxiety, severe insomnia, total loss of appetite, deep depression, internal restlessness, anhedonia) 0.125g triazolam 2 times 18/03/2022 WAVE (anxiety, severe insomnia, total loss of appetite, PAIN in muscles and nerves, arms and right leg,cannot exercise,hard to walk) 0.125g triazolam 3 times 7/5 rein 0.1mg Link to comment
Mentor Greatful Posted August 13, 2021 Mentor Share Posted August 13, 2021 @Marta Thank You for the update. I have been thinking of you. I had such dark depression for a few days and would think of you and how incredible strong you are. Your wave is going to lift soon, a small peak at a good feelings is a good thing. The glimpses will get longer and more often. Please share with me some of your coping skill that you use. I try to meditate a least once a day, most days twice. I walk at least 6 days a week in the morning Try to do mindfulness during the day. Journal Get outside as much as I can. I am here if you need to talk❤️ https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/24894-greatful-is-this-withdrawal-or-to-many-med-changes-at-once/ 1995? Prozac, tried several Paxil, Serzone, St John's Wart back to Prozac and Trazodone ct:d Traz Lexapro. Tried to stop Crash in 2015 Kindled Hospitalized, Vybrid, Seroquel, Effexor, Abilify Pristiq, Wellbutrin-- 2016 ended back on Prozac and Lamictal 200mg 5/2020 thru 12/2020 taper from 20mg Prozac down to 3mg. Crashed 12/13/2020 Zoloft 50mg 1/29ct 1/29/2021 Seroquel 50mg ct 2/12/2021 Wellbutrin 75mg. Became hypo manic 2/1 6ct Trazodone 50mg 4/25 25mg 2/5/ 2021 Lamictal 150mg. 2/24 100mg 4/9 75mg 4/21 37.5 2/16/2021 Seroquel 50xr 3/3 100mg 3/17 150mg side effects ct 4/3 2021 Lexapro 5mg 4/14 7.5mg 4/30 10mg 5/10 7.5mg 2021/ 5/16 5mg Lexapro 37.5 Lamictal 25mg trazadone, xanax .0625mg 3x a day Lexapro Taper> Sept/01/2021 4.90mg> Sept/25 4.75mg> Oct/19 4.69mg > Nov/14 4.2mg Jan/30/2022-- Split dosing 2x a day All liquid 4.2mg (2.20mg at 8am & 2mg at 4pm) 2/17 4mg> 2/24 3.8mg slow taper to Aug/12/2022 2.04mg 2023> 2mg, 1.90mg, 1.80mg, 1.70mg, 1.5mg, 1.4mg, 1.3mg 1.2mg, 1.1mg, 1mg, 0.9mg, 0.8mg, 0.7mg 0.65mg, 0.6mg, 0.55mg, 0.5mg, 0.45mg, 0.4mg, 0.35mg, 0.3mg, 0.25,mg, back to once a day dosing 0 .1mg, 0.07mg , 0.05mg 4/1/2024 0 Lamictal taper 4/17/ 2022 25mg, 9/9/ 22 -20mg, 9/25/22- 15mg , 10/20/22- 0 Trazodone..2023.>down to 14mg, 7mg, 6mg July 2023 0 Xanax 0.0625 3 x a day, 2023> 0.042 3x a day Supplements Magnesium glycinate, Omega 3, D3, vitamin c , zinc, NAC Link to comment
Marta Posted August 14, 2021 Author Share Posted August 14, 2021 @Grateful Many thanks for your messages. I was thinking about how you are doing too. I am sorry for the depression. Even if it's not the "worst" syntmom it just drags everything down to the point where nothing seems to have sense anymore. I am not strong, I think we don't have a choice than keep going. What I do to cope is similar of what you do, really. I try some breathing and stretching. Trying to go outside (however is so hot here). Journal I was doing now it's too demanding. Trying to organise the meals (as eating is a big effort). Pushing to do houseworks (it's so hard to start because i am so fatigued but while doing them fatigue goes away). Then i will be honest i spend a lot of time looking for ADs themed YouTube video. They make me sad i know i should stay far away from them but the time passes faster. I am worried to lose all the small tiny improvements and go back to the beginning. Very hard time for us. I wish you to resist!!!! 06/2012 - 02/2015 CIPRALEX 10 mg (for somatic abdominal pain + reflux) - prior to this NOT any significant episode of anxiety/depression on medication: emotional-sexual numbness, total inability to cry, +8 kg, fatigue -> abdominal pain gone 02/2015 - 1/04/2015 tapering from 10 mg to 0 mg doctor advised 05/05/2015 huge anxiety, burning skin sensation, panic, fear, not able to cry again, never-had-before insomnia, totally lost appetite, little loss of vision in one eye, sweating, chest pain, short breath, restlessness, accelerated heartbeat, mild akathisia legs-feet 30/05/2015 reinstated 8mg (I was suggested 5 mg here) middle 07/2015 general improving 10/2015 start disastrous too long taper 7mg 11/2015 6mg 12/2015 5mg 1/2016 4mg 2/2016 4mg 3/2016 3mg ->FAIL back to 4mg .... 8/2016 3mg 8/2017 2mg (short wave in summer '17) 8/2018 2mg stable 8/2019 1mg 1/2020 0.6 mg 1/APRIL/2020 0mg FREE! 7/2020 - 10/2020 MILD WAVE(mostly anxiety, poor sleep) 6/2021 - 9/2021 WAVE (anxiety, severe insomnia, total loss of appetite, deep depression, internal restlessness, anhedonia) 0.125g triazolam 2 times 18/03/2022 WAVE (anxiety, severe insomnia, total loss of appetite, PAIN in muscles and nerves, arms and right leg,cannot exercise,hard to walk) 0.125g triazolam 3 times 7/5 rein 0.1mg Link to comment
Mentor Greatful Posted August 14, 2021 Mentor Share Posted August 14, 2021 @Marta Oh gush you sound a lot like me. Thank goodness we can share and find comfort that we are not alone😊 I go through having a hard time to eat also. Usually have no appetite and but can eat some, not always much. But lately I have been nauseous and some mornings feel like I am going to throw up UGH. Are you losing weight to. I haven't checked now for a little while. It is a good thing that I had some extra weight on me when this all started. ha,ha I didn't get out and walk yet today. I could not get out of bed. Do you ever feel so fatigued, weak, no drive to move? I usually can get up by this morning it felt so good to stay and bed and take a mental break from trying to push yourself to move, and I usually have to much anxiety to just lay there. Today I didn't have as much. It was close to 11am before I got up for the day and got dressed. The obsessing started, so time to move! 6 hours ago, Marta said: Pushing to do house works (it's so hard to start because i am so fatigued but while doing them fatigue goes away). I try to push myself a little. Some days I just can't find much energy and sometimes it helps to move. It seems if you can have a little bit of a routine it can motivate you. How is it going at home? Still getting good support? Feel free to send out a post if you feel like chatting♥️ These are put on buy a therapist, I think you may find some of these videos helpful https://www.youtube.com/c/TherapyinaNutshell/videos?view=0&sort=p&shelf_id=0 This guy is pretty inspiring. He has recovered from Paxil and Xanax https://www.youtube.com/c/TheLovelyGrind/videos?view=0&sort=dd&shelf_id=0 These will keep you going for a little while♥️ The days can get kind of long. But as someone on SA said the days are long but the weeks go by fast. You are 7 hours ahead of me. 12:10pm here now 7:10pm in Italy https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/24894-greatful-is-this-withdrawal-or-to-many-med-changes-at-once/ 1995? Prozac, tried several Paxil, Serzone, St John's Wart back to Prozac and Trazodone ct:d Traz Lexapro. Tried to stop Crash in 2015 Kindled Hospitalized, Vybrid, Seroquel, Effexor, Abilify Pristiq, Wellbutrin-- 2016 ended back on Prozac and Lamictal 200mg 5/2020 thru 12/2020 taper from 20mg Prozac down to 3mg. Crashed 12/13/2020 Zoloft 50mg 1/29ct 1/29/2021 Seroquel 50mg ct 2/12/2021 Wellbutrin 75mg. Became hypo manic 2/1 6ct Trazodone 50mg 4/25 25mg 2/5/ 2021 Lamictal 150mg. 2/24 100mg 4/9 75mg 4/21 37.5 2/16/2021 Seroquel 50xr 3/3 100mg 3/17 150mg side effects ct 4/3 2021 Lexapro 5mg 4/14 7.5mg 4/30 10mg 5/10 7.5mg 2021/ 5/16 5mg Lexapro 37.5 Lamictal 25mg trazadone, xanax .0625mg 3x a day Lexapro Taper> Sept/01/2021 4.90mg> Sept/25 4.75mg> Oct/19 4.69mg > Nov/14 4.2mg Jan/30/2022-- Split dosing 2x a day All liquid 4.2mg (2.20mg at 8am & 2mg at 4pm) 2/17 4mg> 2/24 3.8mg slow taper to Aug/12/2022 2.04mg 2023> 2mg, 1.90mg, 1.80mg, 1.70mg, 1.5mg, 1.4mg, 1.3mg 1.2mg, 1.1mg, 1mg, 0.9mg, 0.8mg, 0.7mg 0.65mg, 0.6mg, 0.55mg, 0.5mg, 0.45mg, 0.4mg, 0.35mg, 0.3mg, 0.25,mg, back to once a day dosing 0 .1mg, 0.07mg , 0.05mg 4/1/2024 0 Lamictal taper 4/17/ 2022 25mg, 9/9/ 22 -20mg, 9/25/22- 15mg , 10/20/22- 0 Trazodone..2023.>down to 14mg, 7mg, 6mg July 2023 0 Xanax 0.0625 3 x a day, 2023> 0.042 3x a day Supplements Magnesium glycinate, Omega 3, D3, vitamin c , zinc, NAC Link to comment
Mentor RachelSusan Posted August 17, 2021 Mentor Share Posted August 17, 2021 @Marta Hello Marta, I saw your post on Tom57's thread and though I would read your story. I am very sorry for what you are going through. I've been tapering for about 5 years. I have had many times where I thought I was stable only to get hit with a wave that lasted months and months. I haven't gone completely off so I can only imagine what it feels like to get your nasty surprise after 13 months. I have read about many others going through this after being completely off so I know that sadly it is common. I hope you see improvement sooner rather than later. You sound like a very nice person who has suffered a lot from tapering. I hope you feel better soon. Warm wishes, Rachel I am not a health professional in any way. I do not give medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a professional medical practitioner. NEW INFORMATION FOR GABAPENTIN TAPER April 29, 2022 900 mg to 800 mg (11%), May 29, 2022 800 to 700 mg (12.5%), June 20, 2022 700 to 650mg (8%), July 20, 2022 650 to 575 (12%), August 20, 575 to 500 (13%), Sept 20, 2020 500 to 475mg (5%) Nov 7, 2022 475 to 425 (11%), Nov 21, 2022 500mg Medications: Gabapentin, Prednisone 1.5mg a day, Cortisol Inhaler daily. HISTORY FOR ZOLOFT TAPER Feb. 2016 to June 2016 - Was on 150mg Zoloft. Put on Gabapentin at 900mg a day in 2016 due to antidepressant withdrawal. Quit Zoloft (Sertraline) June 2016, reinstated 50mg of Zoloft July 2016. From July 2016 to October 2016 went from 50 mg down 2.3 mg. I up-dosed in November 2016 to 12.5 mg. Held there until January 2017 when I started a much slower taper. STARTING SENSIBLE ZOLOFT TAPERING USING GUIDELINES FROM THIS SITE Dec. 10 2016 - switched to Liquid Zoloft (Sertraline) @ 12.5 mg. Jan. 4, 2020 1.875 mg (6.3%). Jan. 25, 2020 1.75 mg. Feb. 29, 2020 1.625mg (7.10%). Apr. 4, 2020 1.5 mg. May 9, 2020 1.375 mg. June 6, 2020 1.25 mg. (9.10%). July 4, 2020 1.125 mg. (10%). August 15, 2020 1.0 mg. Oct 24, 2020 .875 mg. Nov. 28, 2020 .75mg. Jan 16, 2021 .685mg (8.7%). Feb 13, 2021 .62mg. March 12, 2021 .56mg. May 1, 2021 .375mg. May 29, 2021 .25mg. June 26, 2021 .0125mg. July 25, 2021 .065mg. August 22, 2021 .048mg. October 2, 2021 .043mg. October 10, 2021 .038mg. October 23, 2021 .035mg. October 30, 2021 .032mg. Nov. 13, 2021 .030 mg. Dec 4, 2021 .0285 mg. Dec 11, 2021 .0265 mg. Dec 18, 2021 .0246 mg. Dec 25, 2021 .023mg. Jan 1, 2022. 0 mg. OFF COMPLETELY Link to comment
Marta Posted August 22, 2021 Author Share Posted August 22, 2021 @Grateful Many thanks for the links i really enjoyed....and the kind words as well. I hope you are ok!!! @RachelSusan Thanks for your kind words. I wish the final part of your tapering will be ok!! Yes it's nasty to have these "gifts" out of nowhere.... We know it takes so long. During this and last week i had surely bigger windows. Syntmoms were much less and living was a bit easier. I tried to do my best to enjoy this bit of relief. Maybe I almost overdid. For example when i had a bit of appetite back i found myself that i forgot how to eat. I chewed too fast and ate too much for sure. Or for example i felt better to try more exercise but i probably overdid and just added extra arches. Good emotions came back few times,still very small but considering how bad i was it's ok.... For the rest i never had alcohol, caffeine or went to bed too late, too scared to make it worse....but still (sadly) from yesterday I am still back in a bad state but surely not the worst in this long wave. I am very disappointed of course. I hope it will not again last too long this time.... 06/2012 - 02/2015 CIPRALEX 10 mg (for somatic abdominal pain + reflux) - prior to this NOT any significant episode of anxiety/depression on medication: emotional-sexual numbness, total inability to cry, +8 kg, fatigue -> abdominal pain gone 02/2015 - 1/04/2015 tapering from 10 mg to 0 mg doctor advised 05/05/2015 huge anxiety, burning skin sensation, panic, fear, not able to cry again, never-had-before insomnia, totally lost appetite, little loss of vision in one eye, sweating, chest pain, short breath, restlessness, accelerated heartbeat, mild akathisia legs-feet 30/05/2015 reinstated 8mg (I was suggested 5 mg here) middle 07/2015 general improving 10/2015 start disastrous too long taper 7mg 11/2015 6mg 12/2015 5mg 1/2016 4mg 2/2016 4mg 3/2016 3mg ->FAIL back to 4mg .... 8/2016 3mg 8/2017 2mg (short wave in summer '17) 8/2018 2mg stable 8/2019 1mg 1/2020 0.6 mg 1/APRIL/2020 0mg FREE! 7/2020 - 10/2020 MILD WAVE(mostly anxiety, poor sleep) 6/2021 - 9/2021 WAVE (anxiety, severe insomnia, total loss of appetite, deep depression, internal restlessness, anhedonia) 0.125g triazolam 2 times 18/03/2022 WAVE (anxiety, severe insomnia, total loss of appetite, PAIN in muscles and nerves, arms and right leg,cannot exercise,hard to walk) 0.125g triazolam 3 times 7/5 rein 0.1mg Link to comment
Yersinia Posted August 23, 2021 Share Posted August 23, 2021 Hi @Marta - I’m so glad to hear you are having some windows. Hang in there. 2004 - prozac then wellbutrin (don't recall dosages) 2005 - 150 mg Effexor Rx (or generic equivalent) April 28, 2021 first day without Effexor after very rapid titration off (probably equivalent to CT). July 23, 2021 Reinstatement of ~3mg of Venlafaxine ER (~8.9mg of capsule material). 50 mg Chelated Magnesium, 4X a day 1000mg DHA+EPA Fish oil 2X day Link to comment
Mentor RachelSusan Posted August 23, 2021 Mentor Share Posted August 23, 2021 @Marta Hi Marta, These small windows are hopefully a sign of more improvement to come. I hope you get many more windows soon. I am not a health professional in any way. I do not give medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a professional medical practitioner. NEW INFORMATION FOR GABAPENTIN TAPER April 29, 2022 900 mg to 800 mg (11%), May 29, 2022 800 to 700 mg (12.5%), June 20, 2022 700 to 650mg (8%), July 20, 2022 650 to 575 (12%), August 20, 575 to 500 (13%), Sept 20, 2020 500 to 475mg (5%) Nov 7, 2022 475 to 425 (11%), Nov 21, 2022 500mg Medications: Gabapentin, Prednisone 1.5mg a day, Cortisol Inhaler daily. HISTORY FOR ZOLOFT TAPER Feb. 2016 to June 2016 - Was on 150mg Zoloft. Put on Gabapentin at 900mg a day in 2016 due to antidepressant withdrawal. Quit Zoloft (Sertraline) June 2016, reinstated 50mg of Zoloft July 2016. From July 2016 to October 2016 went from 50 mg down 2.3 mg. I up-dosed in November 2016 to 12.5 mg. Held there until January 2017 when I started a much slower taper. STARTING SENSIBLE ZOLOFT TAPERING USING GUIDELINES FROM THIS SITE Dec. 10 2016 - switched to Liquid Zoloft (Sertraline) @ 12.5 mg. Jan. 4, 2020 1.875 mg (6.3%). Jan. 25, 2020 1.75 mg. Feb. 29, 2020 1.625mg (7.10%). Apr. 4, 2020 1.5 mg. May 9, 2020 1.375 mg. June 6, 2020 1.25 mg. (9.10%). July 4, 2020 1.125 mg. (10%). August 15, 2020 1.0 mg. Oct 24, 2020 .875 mg. Nov. 28, 2020 .75mg. Jan 16, 2021 .685mg (8.7%). Feb 13, 2021 .62mg. March 12, 2021 .56mg. May 1, 2021 .375mg. May 29, 2021 .25mg. June 26, 2021 .0125mg. July 25, 2021 .065mg. August 22, 2021 .048mg. October 2, 2021 .043mg. October 10, 2021 .038mg. October 23, 2021 .035mg. October 30, 2021 .032mg. Nov. 13, 2021 .030 mg. Dec 4, 2021 .0285 mg. Dec 11, 2021 .0265 mg. Dec 18, 2021 .0246 mg. Dec 25, 2021 .023mg. Jan 1, 2022. 0 mg. OFF COMPLETELY Link to comment
Mentor Greatful Posted August 23, 2021 Mentor Share Posted August 23, 2021 @Marta Awesome a little break, You are healing. Another window is right around the corner❤️ https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/24894-greatful-is-this-withdrawal-or-to-many-med-changes-at-once/ 1995? Prozac, tried several Paxil, Serzone, St John's Wart back to Prozac and Trazodone ct:d Traz Lexapro. Tried to stop Crash in 2015 Kindled Hospitalized, Vybrid, Seroquel, Effexor, Abilify Pristiq, Wellbutrin-- 2016 ended back on Prozac and Lamictal 200mg 5/2020 thru 12/2020 taper from 20mg Prozac down to 3mg. Crashed 12/13/2020 Zoloft 50mg 1/29ct 1/29/2021 Seroquel 50mg ct 2/12/2021 Wellbutrin 75mg. Became hypo manic 2/1 6ct Trazodone 50mg 4/25 25mg 2/5/ 2021 Lamictal 150mg. 2/24 100mg 4/9 75mg 4/21 37.5 2/16/2021 Seroquel 50xr 3/3 100mg 3/17 150mg side effects ct 4/3 2021 Lexapro 5mg 4/14 7.5mg 4/30 10mg 5/10 7.5mg 2021/ 5/16 5mg Lexapro 37.5 Lamictal 25mg trazadone, xanax .0625mg 3x a day Lexapro Taper> Sept/01/2021 4.90mg> Sept/25 4.75mg> Oct/19 4.69mg > Nov/14 4.2mg Jan/30/2022-- Split dosing 2x a day All liquid 4.2mg (2.20mg at 8am & 2mg at 4pm) 2/17 4mg> 2/24 3.8mg slow taper to Aug/12/2022 2.04mg 2023> 2mg, 1.90mg, 1.80mg, 1.70mg, 1.5mg, 1.4mg, 1.3mg 1.2mg, 1.1mg, 1mg, 0.9mg, 0.8mg, 0.7mg 0.65mg, 0.6mg, 0.55mg, 0.5mg, 0.45mg, 0.4mg, 0.35mg, 0.3mg, 0.25,mg, back to once a day dosing 0 .1mg, 0.07mg , 0.05mg 4/1/2024 0 Lamictal taper 4/17/ 2022 25mg, 9/9/ 22 -20mg, 9/25/22- 15mg , 10/20/22- 0 Trazodone..2023.>down to 14mg, 7mg, 6mg July 2023 0 Xanax 0.0625 3 x a day, 2023> 0.042 3x a day Supplements Magnesium glycinate, Omega 3, D3, vitamin c , zinc, NAC Link to comment
almuPA Posted August 27, 2021 Share Posted August 27, 2021 On 8/22/2021 at 9:47 AM, Marta said: During this and last week i had surely bigger windows. Syntmoms were much less and living was a bit easier. Thats very good news! I am so glad you had some relive from your symptoms! On 8/22/2021 at 9:47 AM, Marta said: I tried to do my best to enjoy this bit of relief. Maybe I almost overdid. For example when i had a bit of appetite back i found myself that i forgot how to eat. I chewed too fast and ate too much for sure. Or for example i felt better to try more exercise but i probably overdid and just added extra arches. I can completely identify with that. When I have a window, it is like you want to have all the time back, and I normally overdo. But I dont regret it and I try not to be hard on myself, we already suffer too much. You are doing it great, you are very brave, I think more than what you think! I send you a big big hug, Almu. March 2019: 10mg Citalopram April 2019: 20mg Citalopram October/November 2019(sorry, I don't remember the exact date): 10mg of Citalopram without tapering, as suggested by my pharmacist. March 2020: Started "tapering", taking the 10mg of Citalopram every other day, again, following the recommendations of my pharmacist. April 2020: Stopped taking Citalopram. I haven't reinstall since then. I've tried taking Magnesium a couple of times, but I found out it makes me nervous. I only take Paracetemol when the headache becomes unbearable (2gr every couple of weeks or so). Link to comment
Mentor Greatful Posted September 9, 2021 Mentor Share Posted September 9, 2021 @Marta Hi, how are you doing. Hopefully you are still feeling better.❤️ https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/24894-greatful-is-this-withdrawal-or-to-many-med-changes-at-once/ 1995? Prozac, tried several Paxil, Serzone, St John's Wart back to Prozac and Trazodone ct:d Traz Lexapro. Tried to stop Crash in 2015 Kindled Hospitalized, Vybrid, Seroquel, Effexor, Abilify Pristiq, Wellbutrin-- 2016 ended back on Prozac and Lamictal 200mg 5/2020 thru 12/2020 taper from 20mg Prozac down to 3mg. Crashed 12/13/2020 Zoloft 50mg 1/29ct 1/29/2021 Seroquel 50mg ct 2/12/2021 Wellbutrin 75mg. Became hypo manic 2/1 6ct Trazodone 50mg 4/25 25mg 2/5/ 2021 Lamictal 150mg. 2/24 100mg 4/9 75mg 4/21 37.5 2/16/2021 Seroquel 50xr 3/3 100mg 3/17 150mg side effects ct 4/3 2021 Lexapro 5mg 4/14 7.5mg 4/30 10mg 5/10 7.5mg 2021/ 5/16 5mg Lexapro 37.5 Lamictal 25mg trazadone, xanax .0625mg 3x a day Lexapro Taper> Sept/01/2021 4.90mg> Sept/25 4.75mg> Oct/19 4.69mg > Nov/14 4.2mg Jan/30/2022-- Split dosing 2x a day All liquid 4.2mg (2.20mg at 8am & 2mg at 4pm) 2/17 4mg> 2/24 3.8mg slow taper to Aug/12/2022 2.04mg 2023> 2mg, 1.90mg, 1.80mg, 1.70mg, 1.5mg, 1.4mg, 1.3mg 1.2mg, 1.1mg, 1mg, 0.9mg, 0.8mg, 0.7mg 0.65mg, 0.6mg, 0.55mg, 0.5mg, 0.45mg, 0.4mg, 0.35mg, 0.3mg, 0.25,mg, back to once a day dosing 0 .1mg, 0.07mg , 0.05mg 4/1/2024 0 Lamictal taper 4/17/ 2022 25mg, 9/9/ 22 -20mg, 9/25/22- 15mg , 10/20/22- 0 Trazodone..2023.>down to 14mg, 7mg, 6mg July 2023 0 Xanax 0.0625 3 x a day, 2023> 0.042 3x a day Supplements Magnesium glycinate, Omega 3, D3, vitamin c , zinc, NAC Link to comment
Marta Posted September 13, 2021 Author Share Posted September 13, 2021 @Grateful hi! Thanks for your post ❤️ Many things are much better now. The appetite is better. Sleep is ok too. Stomach is general is "meh" but at least i have good and bad days. For the psychological side, better also but still not "me"....sure the depression/anguish/anxiety are almost gone and never strong as months ago,but the good emotions toward my significant and my family are like tiny bubbles and often they pop too fast. Same for hobby, friendship and motivation. I am grateful i have some relief...i am also now in alert mode because i am scared of a new wave. How are you doing?❤️ sending hugs!!! 1 06/2012 - 02/2015 CIPRALEX 10 mg (for somatic abdominal pain + reflux) - prior to this NOT any significant episode of anxiety/depression on medication: emotional-sexual numbness, total inability to cry, +8 kg, fatigue -> abdominal pain gone 02/2015 - 1/04/2015 tapering from 10 mg to 0 mg doctor advised 05/05/2015 huge anxiety, burning skin sensation, panic, fear, not able to cry again, never-had-before insomnia, totally lost appetite, little loss of vision in one eye, sweating, chest pain, short breath, restlessness, accelerated heartbeat, mild akathisia legs-feet 30/05/2015 reinstated 8mg (I was suggested 5 mg here) middle 07/2015 general improving 10/2015 start disastrous too long taper 7mg 11/2015 6mg 12/2015 5mg 1/2016 4mg 2/2016 4mg 3/2016 3mg ->FAIL back to 4mg .... 8/2016 3mg 8/2017 2mg (short wave in summer '17) 8/2018 2mg stable 8/2019 1mg 1/2020 0.6 mg 1/APRIL/2020 0mg FREE! 7/2020 - 10/2020 MILD WAVE(mostly anxiety, poor sleep) 6/2021 - 9/2021 WAVE (anxiety, severe insomnia, total loss of appetite, deep depression, internal restlessness, anhedonia) 0.125g triazolam 2 times 18/03/2022 WAVE (anxiety, severe insomnia, total loss of appetite, PAIN in muscles and nerves, arms and right leg,cannot exercise,hard to walk) 0.125g triazolam 3 times 7/5 rein 0.1mg Link to comment
Marta Posted September 16, 2021 Author Share Posted September 16, 2021 A note for myself again. Got after few days of peace a deep agitated anxiety/deep depression/overwhelming feeling from a small stress. What i want to remind myself is that pre-meds i surely had also moment of discomfort but now (after experiencing WD) there is like a "threshold strength" of that kind of feelings that i cross every time while before very rarely. 06/2012 - 02/2015 CIPRALEX 10 mg (for somatic abdominal pain + reflux) - prior to this NOT any significant episode of anxiety/depression on medication: emotional-sexual numbness, total inability to cry, +8 kg, fatigue -> abdominal pain gone 02/2015 - 1/04/2015 tapering from 10 mg to 0 mg doctor advised 05/05/2015 huge anxiety, burning skin sensation, panic, fear, not able to cry again, never-had-before insomnia, totally lost appetite, little loss of vision in one eye, sweating, chest pain, short breath, restlessness, accelerated heartbeat, mild akathisia legs-feet 30/05/2015 reinstated 8mg (I was suggested 5 mg here) middle 07/2015 general improving 10/2015 start disastrous too long taper 7mg 11/2015 6mg 12/2015 5mg 1/2016 4mg 2/2016 4mg 3/2016 3mg ->FAIL back to 4mg .... 8/2016 3mg 8/2017 2mg (short wave in summer '17) 8/2018 2mg stable 8/2019 1mg 1/2020 0.6 mg 1/APRIL/2020 0mg FREE! 7/2020 - 10/2020 MILD WAVE(mostly anxiety, poor sleep) 6/2021 - 9/2021 WAVE (anxiety, severe insomnia, total loss of appetite, deep depression, internal restlessness, anhedonia) 0.125g triazolam 2 times 18/03/2022 WAVE (anxiety, severe insomnia, total loss of appetite, PAIN in muscles and nerves, arms and right leg,cannot exercise,hard to walk) 0.125g triazolam 3 times 7/5 rein 0.1mg Link to comment
Mentor Greatful Posted September 18, 2021 Mentor Share Posted September 18, 2021 @Marta I am so sorry that you in another wave. You know that your brain is doing some more healing. When you brain is in a mess that means it is trying to heal some more, readjusting things again. It is maddening to start to see the break in the clouds and then the brain needs to do so more work and the clouds reappear.😥 You are amazing, I really find encouragement with your strength and perseverance. Just think how amazing it is going to be when that window comes and stays. I will be the one clapping the loudest. Of course yelling Hey I am right behind you....... https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/24894-greatful-is-this-withdrawal-or-to-many-med-changes-at-once/ 1995? Prozac, tried several Paxil, Serzone, St John's Wart back to Prozac and Trazodone ct:d Traz Lexapro. Tried to stop Crash in 2015 Kindled Hospitalized, Vybrid, Seroquel, Effexor, Abilify Pristiq, Wellbutrin-- 2016 ended back on Prozac and Lamictal 200mg 5/2020 thru 12/2020 taper from 20mg Prozac down to 3mg. Crashed 12/13/2020 Zoloft 50mg 1/29ct 1/29/2021 Seroquel 50mg ct 2/12/2021 Wellbutrin 75mg. Became hypo manic 2/1 6ct Trazodone 50mg 4/25 25mg 2/5/ 2021 Lamictal 150mg. 2/24 100mg 4/9 75mg 4/21 37.5 2/16/2021 Seroquel 50xr 3/3 100mg 3/17 150mg side effects ct 4/3 2021 Lexapro 5mg 4/14 7.5mg 4/30 10mg 5/10 7.5mg 2021/ 5/16 5mg Lexapro 37.5 Lamictal 25mg trazadone, xanax .0625mg 3x a day Lexapro Taper> Sept/01/2021 4.90mg> Sept/25 4.75mg> Oct/19 4.69mg > Nov/14 4.2mg Jan/30/2022-- Split dosing 2x a day All liquid 4.2mg (2.20mg at 8am & 2mg at 4pm) 2/17 4mg> 2/24 3.8mg slow taper to Aug/12/2022 2.04mg 2023> 2mg, 1.90mg, 1.80mg, 1.70mg, 1.5mg, 1.4mg, 1.3mg 1.2mg, 1.1mg, 1mg, 0.9mg, 0.8mg, 0.7mg 0.65mg, 0.6mg, 0.55mg, 0.5mg, 0.45mg, 0.4mg, 0.35mg, 0.3mg, 0.25,mg, back to once a day dosing 0 .1mg, 0.07mg , 0.05mg 4/1/2024 0 Lamictal taper 4/17/ 2022 25mg, 9/9/ 22 -20mg, 9/25/22- 15mg , 10/20/22- 0 Trazodone..2023.>down to 14mg, 7mg, 6mg July 2023 0 Xanax 0.0625 3 x a day, 2023> 0.042 3x a day Supplements Magnesium glycinate, Omega 3, D3, vitamin c , zinc, NAC Link to comment
Mentor Greatful Posted October 4, 2021 Mentor Share Posted October 4, 2021 @Marta I am thinking of you, how are you doing. I am seeing a little light in the crack of a curtain myself, so I can relate to waves trying to suck us under, but we have this big life raft called SA to hang on to. Hang in there❤️ https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/24894-greatful-is-this-withdrawal-or-to-many-med-changes-at-once/ 1995? Prozac, tried several Paxil, Serzone, St John's Wart back to Prozac and Trazodone ct:d Traz Lexapro. Tried to stop Crash in 2015 Kindled Hospitalized, Vybrid, Seroquel, Effexor, Abilify Pristiq, Wellbutrin-- 2016 ended back on Prozac and Lamictal 200mg 5/2020 thru 12/2020 taper from 20mg Prozac down to 3mg. Crashed 12/13/2020 Zoloft 50mg 1/29ct 1/29/2021 Seroquel 50mg ct 2/12/2021 Wellbutrin 75mg. Became hypo manic 2/1 6ct Trazodone 50mg 4/25 25mg 2/5/ 2021 Lamictal 150mg. 2/24 100mg 4/9 75mg 4/21 37.5 2/16/2021 Seroquel 50xr 3/3 100mg 3/17 150mg side effects ct 4/3 2021 Lexapro 5mg 4/14 7.5mg 4/30 10mg 5/10 7.5mg 2021/ 5/16 5mg Lexapro 37.5 Lamictal 25mg trazadone, xanax .0625mg 3x a day Lexapro Taper> Sept/01/2021 4.90mg> Sept/25 4.75mg> Oct/19 4.69mg > Nov/14 4.2mg Jan/30/2022-- Split dosing 2x a day All liquid 4.2mg (2.20mg at 8am & 2mg at 4pm) 2/17 4mg> 2/24 3.8mg slow taper to Aug/12/2022 2.04mg 2023> 2mg, 1.90mg, 1.80mg, 1.70mg, 1.5mg, 1.4mg, 1.3mg 1.2mg, 1.1mg, 1mg, 0.9mg, 0.8mg, 0.7mg 0.65mg, 0.6mg, 0.55mg, 0.5mg, 0.45mg, 0.4mg, 0.35mg, 0.3mg, 0.25,mg, back to once a day dosing 0 .1mg, 0.07mg , 0.05mg 4/1/2024 0 Lamictal taper 4/17/ 2022 25mg, 9/9/ 22 -20mg, 9/25/22- 15mg , 10/20/22- 0 Trazodone..2023.>down to 14mg, 7mg, 6mg July 2023 0 Xanax 0.0625 3 x a day, 2023> 0.042 3x a day Supplements Magnesium glycinate, Omega 3, D3, vitamin c , zinc, NAC Link to comment
Marta Posted October 11, 2021 Author Share Posted October 11, 2021 @Grateful many thanks for stopping by. I try to be rational but sometimes i laugh at myself as i am almost scared to say that i am not so bad that maybe my body start to feel bad again. If i am not wrong it's a common reaction after a health-trauma. I am happy if you saw a ray of light. ❤️ I believe really once you see the light, rhe light will come again. Not sure when but it will come again!!!! I acknowledge that there are entire hours that I feel ok, almost good I would say. Of course there are still bad hours too but they are lighter, really. (Short story: two weeks ago i rationally decided to cheer for my boyfriend phd defence,he really made effort to organise his party and i wanted for once not to make him think about me as often happens, so i allowed myself to drink 3 glasses of wine like everyone else..... I am alcohol free since half 2020 ... the few glasses of alcohol send me immediately back to insomnia, agitation of THAT WD kind....i expected it, really i was waiting for it.... And since i knew it, i really just let it pass, embraced the two sleepless nights and slowly regained the pattern of sleep in the following days and mood slowly went back to a not-so-bad state as i am now. What did i learn? That i have and extra proof to take care of myself and continuing avoiding alcohol ) 06/2012 - 02/2015 CIPRALEX 10 mg (for somatic abdominal pain + reflux) - prior to this NOT any significant episode of anxiety/depression on medication: emotional-sexual numbness, total inability to cry, +8 kg, fatigue -> abdominal pain gone 02/2015 - 1/04/2015 tapering from 10 mg to 0 mg doctor advised 05/05/2015 huge anxiety, burning skin sensation, panic, fear, not able to cry again, never-had-before insomnia, totally lost appetite, little loss of vision in one eye, sweating, chest pain, short breath, restlessness, accelerated heartbeat, mild akathisia legs-feet 30/05/2015 reinstated 8mg (I was suggested 5 mg here) middle 07/2015 general improving 10/2015 start disastrous too long taper 7mg 11/2015 6mg 12/2015 5mg 1/2016 4mg 2/2016 4mg 3/2016 3mg ->FAIL back to 4mg .... 8/2016 3mg 8/2017 2mg (short wave in summer '17) 8/2018 2mg stable 8/2019 1mg 1/2020 0.6 mg 1/APRIL/2020 0mg FREE! 7/2020 - 10/2020 MILD WAVE(mostly anxiety, poor sleep) 6/2021 - 9/2021 WAVE (anxiety, severe insomnia, total loss of appetite, deep depression, internal restlessness, anhedonia) 0.125g triazolam 2 times 18/03/2022 WAVE (anxiety, severe insomnia, total loss of appetite, PAIN in muscles and nerves, arms and right leg,cannot exercise,hard to walk) 0.125g triazolam 3 times 7/5 rein 0.1mg Link to comment
Marta Posted October 23, 2021 Author Share Posted October 23, 2021 I don't know I should be grateful for the few days/hours where I was okish but I had so many setbacks lately. Please keep me in your thoughts. 06/2012 - 02/2015 CIPRALEX 10 mg (for somatic abdominal pain + reflux) - prior to this NOT any significant episode of anxiety/depression on medication: emotional-sexual numbness, total inability to cry, +8 kg, fatigue -> abdominal pain gone 02/2015 - 1/04/2015 tapering from 10 mg to 0 mg doctor advised 05/05/2015 huge anxiety, burning skin sensation, panic, fear, not able to cry again, never-had-before insomnia, totally lost appetite, little loss of vision in one eye, sweating, chest pain, short breath, restlessness, accelerated heartbeat, mild akathisia legs-feet 30/05/2015 reinstated 8mg (I was suggested 5 mg here) middle 07/2015 general improving 10/2015 start disastrous too long taper 7mg 11/2015 6mg 12/2015 5mg 1/2016 4mg 2/2016 4mg 3/2016 3mg ->FAIL back to 4mg .... 8/2016 3mg 8/2017 2mg (short wave in summer '17) 8/2018 2mg stable 8/2019 1mg 1/2020 0.6 mg 1/APRIL/2020 0mg FREE! 7/2020 - 10/2020 MILD WAVE(mostly anxiety, poor sleep) 6/2021 - 9/2021 WAVE (anxiety, severe insomnia, total loss of appetite, deep depression, internal restlessness, anhedonia) 0.125g triazolam 2 times 18/03/2022 WAVE (anxiety, severe insomnia, total loss of appetite, PAIN in muscles and nerves, arms and right leg,cannot exercise,hard to walk) 0.125g triazolam 3 times 7/5 rein 0.1mg Link to comment
Mentor Greatful Posted October 23, 2021 Mentor Share Posted October 23, 2021 @Marta Oh marta, in a wave again. Those windows can seem like a tease sometimes.🙄 I'm here with you, working through one day at a times❤️ https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/24894-greatful-is-this-withdrawal-or-to-many-med-changes-at-once/ 1995? Prozac, tried several Paxil, Serzone, St John's Wart back to Prozac and Trazodone ct:d Traz Lexapro. Tried to stop Crash in 2015 Kindled Hospitalized, Vybrid, Seroquel, Effexor, Abilify Pristiq, Wellbutrin-- 2016 ended back on Prozac and Lamictal 200mg 5/2020 thru 12/2020 taper from 20mg Prozac down to 3mg. Crashed 12/13/2020 Zoloft 50mg 1/29ct 1/29/2021 Seroquel 50mg ct 2/12/2021 Wellbutrin 75mg. Became hypo manic 2/1 6ct Trazodone 50mg 4/25 25mg 2/5/ 2021 Lamictal 150mg. 2/24 100mg 4/9 75mg 4/21 37.5 2/16/2021 Seroquel 50xr 3/3 100mg 3/17 150mg side effects ct 4/3 2021 Lexapro 5mg 4/14 7.5mg 4/30 10mg 5/10 7.5mg 2021/ 5/16 5mg Lexapro 37.5 Lamictal 25mg trazadone, xanax .0625mg 3x a day Lexapro Taper> Sept/01/2021 4.90mg> Sept/25 4.75mg> Oct/19 4.69mg > Nov/14 4.2mg Jan/30/2022-- Split dosing 2x a day All liquid 4.2mg (2.20mg at 8am & 2mg at 4pm) 2/17 4mg> 2/24 3.8mg slow taper to Aug/12/2022 2.04mg 2023> 2mg, 1.90mg, 1.80mg, 1.70mg, 1.5mg, 1.4mg, 1.3mg 1.2mg, 1.1mg, 1mg, 0.9mg, 0.8mg, 0.7mg 0.65mg, 0.6mg, 0.55mg, 0.5mg, 0.45mg, 0.4mg, 0.35mg, 0.3mg, 0.25,mg, back to once a day dosing 0 .1mg, 0.07mg , 0.05mg 4/1/2024 0 Lamictal taper 4/17/ 2022 25mg, 9/9/ 22 -20mg, 9/25/22- 15mg , 10/20/22- 0 Trazodone..2023.>down to 14mg, 7mg, 6mg July 2023 0 Xanax 0.0625 3 x a day, 2023> 0.042 3x a day Supplements Magnesium glycinate, Omega 3, D3, vitamin c , zinc, NAC Link to comment
Marta Posted October 27, 2021 Author Share Posted October 27, 2021 @Grateful thanks for stopping by ... All is back, lack of appetite, poor sleep and during WD in the last months i developed also a dermatitis (never had before) and now its flaring so much.... Yes i just survive day by day. I don't want to blame the WD for anything but damn I dont have anything of my "old life" aches ... It's all new and much worse 06/2012 - 02/2015 CIPRALEX 10 mg (for somatic abdominal pain + reflux) - prior to this NOT any significant episode of anxiety/depression on medication: emotional-sexual numbness, total inability to cry, +8 kg, fatigue -> abdominal pain gone 02/2015 - 1/04/2015 tapering from 10 mg to 0 mg doctor advised 05/05/2015 huge anxiety, burning skin sensation, panic, fear, not able to cry again, never-had-before insomnia, totally lost appetite, little loss of vision in one eye, sweating, chest pain, short breath, restlessness, accelerated heartbeat, mild akathisia legs-feet 30/05/2015 reinstated 8mg (I was suggested 5 mg here) middle 07/2015 general improving 10/2015 start disastrous too long taper 7mg 11/2015 6mg 12/2015 5mg 1/2016 4mg 2/2016 4mg 3/2016 3mg ->FAIL back to 4mg .... 8/2016 3mg 8/2017 2mg (short wave in summer '17) 8/2018 2mg stable 8/2019 1mg 1/2020 0.6 mg 1/APRIL/2020 0mg FREE! 7/2020 - 10/2020 MILD WAVE(mostly anxiety, poor sleep) 6/2021 - 9/2021 WAVE (anxiety, severe insomnia, total loss of appetite, deep depression, internal restlessness, anhedonia) 0.125g triazolam 2 times 18/03/2022 WAVE (anxiety, severe insomnia, total loss of appetite, PAIN in muscles and nerves, arms and right leg,cannot exercise,hard to walk) 0.125g triazolam 3 times 7/5 rein 0.1mg Link to comment
Mentor Greatful Posted November 3, 2021 Mentor Share Posted November 3, 2021 @Marta This is the worst amusement park ever. The roller-coasters are horrible, the merry-go-round doesn't stop. Maybe all the dermatitis is what's left from the drugs coming out of your system. The new aches, let's say are from the last bit of nerve repair. This is your last little fling with the drugs.....🙄 You are closing in on the finish line❤️ https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/24894-greatful-is-this-withdrawal-or-to-many-med-changes-at-once/ 1995? Prozac, tried several Paxil, Serzone, St John's Wart back to Prozac and Trazodone ct:d Traz Lexapro. Tried to stop Crash in 2015 Kindled Hospitalized, Vybrid, Seroquel, Effexor, Abilify Pristiq, Wellbutrin-- 2016 ended back on Prozac and Lamictal 200mg 5/2020 thru 12/2020 taper from 20mg Prozac down to 3mg. Crashed 12/13/2020 Zoloft 50mg 1/29ct 1/29/2021 Seroquel 50mg ct 2/12/2021 Wellbutrin 75mg. Became hypo manic 2/1 6ct Trazodone 50mg 4/25 25mg 2/5/ 2021 Lamictal 150mg. 2/24 100mg 4/9 75mg 4/21 37.5 2/16/2021 Seroquel 50xr 3/3 100mg 3/17 150mg side effects ct 4/3 2021 Lexapro 5mg 4/14 7.5mg 4/30 10mg 5/10 7.5mg 2021/ 5/16 5mg Lexapro 37.5 Lamictal 25mg trazadone, xanax .0625mg 3x a day Lexapro Taper> Sept/01/2021 4.90mg> Sept/25 4.75mg> Oct/19 4.69mg > Nov/14 4.2mg Jan/30/2022-- Split dosing 2x a day All liquid 4.2mg (2.20mg at 8am & 2mg at 4pm) 2/17 4mg> 2/24 3.8mg slow taper to Aug/12/2022 2.04mg 2023> 2mg, 1.90mg, 1.80mg, 1.70mg, 1.5mg, 1.4mg, 1.3mg 1.2mg, 1.1mg, 1mg, 0.9mg, 0.8mg, 0.7mg 0.65mg, 0.6mg, 0.55mg, 0.5mg, 0.45mg, 0.4mg, 0.35mg, 0.3mg, 0.25,mg, back to once a day dosing 0 .1mg, 0.07mg , 0.05mg 4/1/2024 0 Lamictal taper 4/17/ 2022 25mg, 9/9/ 22 -20mg, 9/25/22- 15mg , 10/20/22- 0 Trazodone..2023.>down to 14mg, 7mg, 6mg July 2023 0 Xanax 0.0625 3 x a day, 2023> 0.042 3x a day Supplements Magnesium glycinate, Omega 3, D3, vitamin c , zinc, NAC Link to comment
Marta Posted November 12, 2021 Author Share Posted November 12, 2021 Hi @Gratefulthanks so much that you always check on me...it means so much. It's really a crazy rollercoaster time. I am happy not to be in a "solid" wave anymore but also this unpredictable roulette it's not easy. My body aches so much, billion of different pains, but my brain is almost ok. Then immediately vice versa, my body feels better and i am in a bad mental state........with no peace in between.... I have to vent a bit..... I had surely a lot of stress lately since I was moving in another country, Austria. It has been a hard and rush decision but in Italy it wasn't possible anymore for me and my boyfriend (who is Austrian) to live...we were both jobless!!!! I am done of temporary jobs, i am not in my 20s anymore and I don't have this "i don't know what tomorrow will bring" life mentality. I few days ago I signed a permanent position contract in Austria, the first time in my life (and I am 35!!). I found a job immediately there, such a positive shock!!! The job is (hopefully) not too demanding, i should be able to handle it even in bad state! Also my boyfriend found a job immediately...(but why am i surprised the unemployment rate in Italy especially for graduated people is brutally high and in my region there are no big centers with lots of opportunities... it's just a retirement friendly countryside, as my mother calls it). My previous job in physics research (i have a phd in physics) was too demanding for my brain and the stress levels were huge, and it's a 24/7 struggle for just few moments of satisfaction. And just travel here and there knowing it's all temporary.... I also worked as (temporary) high school teacher, i am not a bad teacher but really I don't feel any connection with teens nowadays, so all the human value of this job was lost for me and i was just left with huge exhaustion and tons of lecture to prepare at home (and in this job one has to hold the pee for hours ahah). I really felt immediately that it's not a job for me. In conclusion: I moved my goal, not 2021 but 2022 will be more a "healing" year. I am med free 1yr and 5months now after almost a damned decade... I am sure i need more time to leave all behind!! I will try to just take home what life, WD, health will throw at me now but at least i have finally a bit of stability i' ve never everrrrrr had before in my life. I hope so so so much this will help my healing!!! 06/2012 - 02/2015 CIPRALEX 10 mg (for somatic abdominal pain + reflux) - prior to this NOT any significant episode of anxiety/depression on medication: emotional-sexual numbness, total inability to cry, +8 kg, fatigue -> abdominal pain gone 02/2015 - 1/04/2015 tapering from 10 mg to 0 mg doctor advised 05/05/2015 huge anxiety, burning skin sensation, panic, fear, not able to cry again, never-had-before insomnia, totally lost appetite, little loss of vision in one eye, sweating, chest pain, short breath, restlessness, accelerated heartbeat, mild akathisia legs-feet 30/05/2015 reinstated 8mg (I was suggested 5 mg here) middle 07/2015 general improving 10/2015 start disastrous too long taper 7mg 11/2015 6mg 12/2015 5mg 1/2016 4mg 2/2016 4mg 3/2016 3mg ->FAIL back to 4mg .... 8/2016 3mg 8/2017 2mg (short wave in summer '17) 8/2018 2mg stable 8/2019 1mg 1/2020 0.6 mg 1/APRIL/2020 0mg FREE! 7/2020 - 10/2020 MILD WAVE(mostly anxiety, poor sleep) 6/2021 - 9/2021 WAVE (anxiety, severe insomnia, total loss of appetite, deep depression, internal restlessness, anhedonia) 0.125g triazolam 2 times 18/03/2022 WAVE (anxiety, severe insomnia, total loss of appetite, PAIN in muscles and nerves, arms and right leg,cannot exercise,hard to walk) 0.125g triazolam 3 times 7/5 rein 0.1mg Link to comment
almuPA Posted November 12, 2021 Share Posted November 12, 2021 Hello @Marta, How are you? There's lots of news in your last post! 14 minutes ago, Marta said: had surely a lot of stress lately since I was moving in another country, Austri Moving is a very stressful situation, the fact that you could handle that and find a job is amazing. Seriously, hats off to you, thats a big accomplishment. Congrats on your new position. 16 minutes ago, Marta said: (i have a phd in physics) My God, thats awsome. 18 minutes ago, Marta said: few days ago I signed a permanent position contract in Austria, the first time in my life (and I am 35!!). I found a job immediately there, such a positive shock!! Something not relate to WD but, dont you think that our generation has It so difficult and that we have been cheated in a way? I have a degree un History and never had a job related to it or well paid. My husband has no university studies and we can both live confortably with his salary(luckilly). I wish you all the best in your new life in Austria. Please, if you have the time and will, keep us update in how you are doing. 26 minutes ago, Marta said: I will try to just take home what life, WD, health will throw at me now but at least i have finally a bit of stability i' ve never everrrrrr had before in my life. I hope so so so much this will help my healing!!! Thats a great actitude. I am sure you will do It, dear Marta. The fact that you have been able to make this Big change shows you can do anything. March 2019: 10mg Citalopram April 2019: 20mg Citalopram October/November 2019(sorry, I don't remember the exact date): 10mg of Citalopram without tapering, as suggested by my pharmacist. March 2020: Started "tapering", taking the 10mg of Citalopram every other day, again, following the recommendations of my pharmacist. April 2020: Stopped taking Citalopram. I haven't reinstall since then. I've tried taking Magnesium a couple of times, but I found out it makes me nervous. I only take Paracetemol when the headache becomes unbearable (2gr every couple of weeks or so). Link to comment
Mentor Greatful Posted January 9, 2022 Mentor Share Posted January 9, 2022 @Marta Hi How are you doing? https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/24894-greatful-is-this-withdrawal-or-to-many-med-changes-at-once/ 1995? Prozac, tried several Paxil, Serzone, St John's Wart back to Prozac and Trazodone ct:d Traz Lexapro. Tried to stop Crash in 2015 Kindled Hospitalized, Vybrid, Seroquel, Effexor, Abilify Pristiq, Wellbutrin-- 2016 ended back on Prozac and Lamictal 200mg 5/2020 thru 12/2020 taper from 20mg Prozac down to 3mg. Crashed 12/13/2020 Zoloft 50mg 1/29ct 1/29/2021 Seroquel 50mg ct 2/12/2021 Wellbutrin 75mg. Became hypo manic 2/1 6ct Trazodone 50mg 4/25 25mg 2/5/ 2021 Lamictal 150mg. 2/24 100mg 4/9 75mg 4/21 37.5 2/16/2021 Seroquel 50xr 3/3 100mg 3/17 150mg side effects ct 4/3 2021 Lexapro 5mg 4/14 7.5mg 4/30 10mg 5/10 7.5mg 2021/ 5/16 5mg Lexapro 37.5 Lamictal 25mg trazadone, xanax .0625mg 3x a day Lexapro Taper> Sept/01/2021 4.90mg> Sept/25 4.75mg> Oct/19 4.69mg > Nov/14 4.2mg Jan/30/2022-- Split dosing 2x a day All liquid 4.2mg (2.20mg at 8am & 2mg at 4pm) 2/17 4mg> 2/24 3.8mg slow taper to Aug/12/2022 2.04mg 2023> 2mg, 1.90mg, 1.80mg, 1.70mg, 1.5mg, 1.4mg, 1.3mg 1.2mg, 1.1mg, 1mg, 0.9mg, 0.8mg, 0.7mg 0.65mg, 0.6mg, 0.55mg, 0.5mg, 0.45mg, 0.4mg, 0.35mg, 0.3mg, 0.25,mg, back to once a day dosing 0 .1mg, 0.07mg , 0.05mg 4/1/2024 0 Lamictal taper 4/17/ 2022 25mg, 9/9/ 22 -20mg, 9/25/22- 15mg , 10/20/22- 0 Trazodone..2023.>down to 14mg, 7mg, 6mg July 2023 0 Xanax 0.0625 3 x a day, 2023> 0.042 3x a day Supplements Magnesium glycinate, Omega 3, D3, vitamin c , zinc, NAC Link to comment
Marta Posted March 2, 2022 Author Share Posted March 2, 2022 @Grateful Hello! Sorry for the delay. Many many thanks for checking in. I quickly update. I was very VERY busy with the moving and the new job, I hope now I can come more often here again... The first month is was constantly in panic/autopilot mode. I had to drive 200km a day, in a crowded highway, in a new country, where i don't know so much the language, with a new car. I think just the adrenaline kept me alive, barely sleeping and eating and in the abyss of anguish. Finally in December I moved at 5 minutes from my workplace. Anyway it has been a rough time, already in a bad place with w/d mixed with normal human adaption problems (anyhow i did routine blood tests, my blood tests are even better now than in my twenties - story of my life, I never look sick when I am dying inside just a bit tired-akathisia has been the only "visible" thing). 2022 so far is a bit better I had a bunch of days when I was OK and I am very pleased... others of course diving in the well known waves but they were not so "paralyzing" like the past ones, still stomach closed, insonnia or body pain but I was more present from the mental torture of anxiety and terror. Next month I mark 2yrs drug free I absolutely don't expect my brain is out of it after almost a decade being altered. Long journey ahead ... 06/2012 - 02/2015 CIPRALEX 10 mg (for somatic abdominal pain + reflux) - prior to this NOT any significant episode of anxiety/depression on medication: emotional-sexual numbness, total inability to cry, +8 kg, fatigue -> abdominal pain gone 02/2015 - 1/04/2015 tapering from 10 mg to 0 mg doctor advised 05/05/2015 huge anxiety, burning skin sensation, panic, fear, not able to cry again, never-had-before insomnia, totally lost appetite, little loss of vision in one eye, sweating, chest pain, short breath, restlessness, accelerated heartbeat, mild akathisia legs-feet 30/05/2015 reinstated 8mg (I was suggested 5 mg here) middle 07/2015 general improving 10/2015 start disastrous too long taper 7mg 11/2015 6mg 12/2015 5mg 1/2016 4mg 2/2016 4mg 3/2016 3mg ->FAIL back to 4mg .... 8/2016 3mg 8/2017 2mg (short wave in summer '17) 8/2018 2mg stable 8/2019 1mg 1/2020 0.6 mg 1/APRIL/2020 0mg FREE! 7/2020 - 10/2020 MILD WAVE(mostly anxiety, poor sleep) 6/2021 - 9/2021 WAVE (anxiety, severe insomnia, total loss of appetite, deep depression, internal restlessness, anhedonia) 0.125g triazolam 2 times 18/03/2022 WAVE (anxiety, severe insomnia, total loss of appetite, PAIN in muscles and nerves, arms and right leg,cannot exercise,hard to walk) 0.125g triazolam 3 times 7/5 rein 0.1mg Link to comment
Mentor Greatful Posted March 2, 2022 Mentor Share Posted March 2, 2022 @Marta Congratulations on everything😊 You moved, and are working in a strange city all the while still struggling with WD and 2 years drug free......You are a huge inspiration. Thank goodness the waves are not as paralyzing or filled with so much anxiety and terror. You are making progress even when you are under so much stress❤️ Take your time and get yourself all put together lol Then when you feel able to reach out and keep us posted. You've got this Marta🌞 https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/24894-greatful-is-this-withdrawal-or-to-many-med-changes-at-once/ 1995? Prozac, tried several Paxil, Serzone, St John's Wart back to Prozac and Trazodone ct:d Traz Lexapro. Tried to stop Crash in 2015 Kindled Hospitalized, Vybrid, Seroquel, Effexor, Abilify Pristiq, Wellbutrin-- 2016 ended back on Prozac and Lamictal 200mg 5/2020 thru 12/2020 taper from 20mg Prozac down to 3mg. Crashed 12/13/2020 Zoloft 50mg 1/29ct 1/29/2021 Seroquel 50mg ct 2/12/2021 Wellbutrin 75mg. Became hypo manic 2/1 6ct Trazodone 50mg 4/25 25mg 2/5/ 2021 Lamictal 150mg. 2/24 100mg 4/9 75mg 4/21 37.5 2/16/2021 Seroquel 50xr 3/3 100mg 3/17 150mg side effects ct 4/3 2021 Lexapro 5mg 4/14 7.5mg 4/30 10mg 5/10 7.5mg 2021/ 5/16 5mg Lexapro 37.5 Lamictal 25mg trazadone, xanax .0625mg 3x a day Lexapro Taper> Sept/01/2021 4.90mg> Sept/25 4.75mg> Oct/19 4.69mg > Nov/14 4.2mg Jan/30/2022-- Split dosing 2x a day All liquid 4.2mg (2.20mg at 8am & 2mg at 4pm) 2/17 4mg> 2/24 3.8mg slow taper to Aug/12/2022 2.04mg 2023> 2mg, 1.90mg, 1.80mg, 1.70mg, 1.5mg, 1.4mg, 1.3mg 1.2mg, 1.1mg, 1mg, 0.9mg, 0.8mg, 0.7mg 0.65mg, 0.6mg, 0.55mg, 0.5mg, 0.45mg, 0.4mg, 0.35mg, 0.3mg, 0.25,mg, back to once a day dosing 0 .1mg, 0.07mg , 0.05mg 4/1/2024 0 Lamictal taper 4/17/ 2022 25mg, 9/9/ 22 -20mg, 9/25/22- 15mg , 10/20/22- 0 Trazodone..2023.>down to 14mg, 7mg, 6mg July 2023 0 Xanax 0.0625 3 x a day, 2023> 0.042 3x a day Supplements Magnesium glycinate, Omega 3, D3, vitamin c , zinc, NAC Link to comment
Marta Posted March 18, 2022 Author Share Posted March 18, 2022 (edited) High fever (no covid so far) can trigger strong wave? I have currently 38.5°C ...I let the fever hit me for few hours now I took some paracetamol waiting to have some relief. So far tested negative for covid. I feel also a mild vaginal infection (to complete the status). I am almost 2yrs free windows and waves pattern after almost a decade lexapro. I felt a wave increasing in the last 2/3 weeks with increasing physical symptoms,no appetite, physical aches, burning like sensations,bad sleep. Then mental distress increased in the last week and today with the fever the doom, anguish, tachicardia,hxper anxiety exploded. You know the usual HELL! I am beyond!!!!! Can someone reassure me that the fever has trigger it and then it can get better when I will feel better or now i have to suffer months again? Did someone had a similar experience? (During the ADs use and in WD so 12yrs I never had such high fever ) Edited March 18, 2022 by ChessieCat added topic title before merging with intro topic 06/2012 - 02/2015 CIPRALEX 10 mg (for somatic abdominal pain + reflux) - prior to this NOT any significant episode of anxiety/depression on medication: emotional-sexual numbness, total inability to cry, +8 kg, fatigue -> abdominal pain gone 02/2015 - 1/04/2015 tapering from 10 mg to 0 mg doctor advised 05/05/2015 huge anxiety, burning skin sensation, panic, fear, not able to cry again, never-had-before insomnia, totally lost appetite, little loss of vision in one eye, sweating, chest pain, short breath, restlessness, accelerated heartbeat, mild akathisia legs-feet 30/05/2015 reinstated 8mg (I was suggested 5 mg here) middle 07/2015 general improving 10/2015 start disastrous too long taper 7mg 11/2015 6mg 12/2015 5mg 1/2016 4mg 2/2016 4mg 3/2016 3mg ->FAIL back to 4mg .... 8/2016 3mg 8/2017 2mg (short wave in summer '17) 8/2018 2mg stable 8/2019 1mg 1/2020 0.6 mg 1/APRIL/2020 0mg FREE! 7/2020 - 10/2020 MILD WAVE(mostly anxiety, poor sleep) 6/2021 - 9/2021 WAVE (anxiety, severe insomnia, total loss of appetite, deep depression, internal restlessness, anhedonia) 0.125g triazolam 2 times 18/03/2022 WAVE (anxiety, severe insomnia, total loss of appetite, PAIN in muscles and nerves, arms and right leg,cannot exercise,hard to walk) 0.125g triazolam 3 times 7/5 rein 0.1mg Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus ChessieCat Posted March 18, 2022 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted March 18, 2022 Any additional stress can cause symptoms to increase. See: It Doesn’t end at “0” Generally a fever indicates that your body is fighting a bacterial infection or virus. This is a stressful on the body. If the high temperature continues and/or you get other worsening of any symptoms my suggestion would be to contact your doctor. * NO LONGER ACTIVE on SA * MISSION ACCOMPLISHED: (6 year taper) 0mg Pristiq on 13th November 2021 ADs since ~1992: 25+ years - 1 unknown, Prozac (muscle weakness), Zoloft; citalopram (pooped out) CTed (very sick for 2.5 wks a few months after); Pristiq: 50mg 2012, 100mg beg 2013 (Serotonin Toxicity) Tapering from Oct 2015 - 13 Nov 2021 LAST DOSE 0.0025mg Post 0 updates start here My tapering program My Intro (goes to tapering graph) VIDEO: Antidepressant Withdrawal Syndrome and its Management Link to comment
Mentor Greatful Posted March 19, 2022 Mentor Share Posted March 19, 2022 @Marta Hang in there Mara, this is always a guessing game....We go right away to worry and panic......I get it we know what WD feels like and once we start to feel better we certainly never want to go back.........You may just have a bug that the body is trying to fight.......... We are here for you♥️ https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/24894-greatful-is-this-withdrawal-or-to-many-med-changes-at-once/ 1995? Prozac, tried several Paxil, Serzone, St John's Wart back to Prozac and Trazodone ct:d Traz Lexapro. Tried to stop Crash in 2015 Kindled Hospitalized, Vybrid, Seroquel, Effexor, Abilify Pristiq, Wellbutrin-- 2016 ended back on Prozac and Lamictal 200mg 5/2020 thru 12/2020 taper from 20mg Prozac down to 3mg. Crashed 12/13/2020 Zoloft 50mg 1/29ct 1/29/2021 Seroquel 50mg ct 2/12/2021 Wellbutrin 75mg. Became hypo manic 2/1 6ct Trazodone 50mg 4/25 25mg 2/5/ 2021 Lamictal 150mg. 2/24 100mg 4/9 75mg 4/21 37.5 2/16/2021 Seroquel 50xr 3/3 100mg 3/17 150mg side effects ct 4/3 2021 Lexapro 5mg 4/14 7.5mg 4/30 10mg 5/10 7.5mg 2021/ 5/16 5mg Lexapro 37.5 Lamictal 25mg trazadone, xanax .0625mg 3x a day Lexapro Taper> Sept/01/2021 4.90mg> Sept/25 4.75mg> Oct/19 4.69mg > Nov/14 4.2mg Jan/30/2022-- Split dosing 2x a day All liquid 4.2mg (2.20mg at 8am & 2mg at 4pm) 2/17 4mg> 2/24 3.8mg slow taper to Aug/12/2022 2.04mg 2023> 2mg, 1.90mg, 1.80mg, 1.70mg, 1.5mg, 1.4mg, 1.3mg 1.2mg, 1.1mg, 1mg, 0.9mg, 0.8mg, 0.7mg 0.65mg, 0.6mg, 0.55mg, 0.5mg, 0.45mg, 0.4mg, 0.35mg, 0.3mg, 0.25,mg, back to once a day dosing 0 .1mg, 0.07mg , 0.05mg 4/1/2024 0 Lamictal taper 4/17/ 2022 25mg, 9/9/ 22 -20mg, 9/25/22- 15mg , 10/20/22- 0 Trazodone..2023.>down to 14mg, 7mg, 6mg July 2023 0 Xanax 0.0625 3 x a day, 2023> 0.042 3x a day Supplements Magnesium glycinate, Omega 3, D3, vitamin c , zinc, NAC Link to comment
Marta Posted March 21, 2022 Author Share Posted March 21, 2022 Update: very bad. I have almost no fever now but the pain and burning in my muscles is a torture. Then insomnia appeared again, loss of appetite keeps going... mentally I am beyond anxiety and dread. @ChessieCat thanks, i read your link it so many times ...but what i get from it is that waves after zero are a minor inconvenience and vanish very fast. While I am 2 years off and is it possible that i am hit so hard now again? 😭 I had last summer and this autumn several weeks long waves.....again???? 06/2012 - 02/2015 CIPRALEX 10 mg (for somatic abdominal pain + reflux) - prior to this NOT any significant episode of anxiety/depression on medication: emotional-sexual numbness, total inability to cry, +8 kg, fatigue -> abdominal pain gone 02/2015 - 1/04/2015 tapering from 10 mg to 0 mg doctor advised 05/05/2015 huge anxiety, burning skin sensation, panic, fear, not able to cry again, never-had-before insomnia, totally lost appetite, little loss of vision in one eye, sweating, chest pain, short breath, restlessness, accelerated heartbeat, mild akathisia legs-feet 30/05/2015 reinstated 8mg (I was suggested 5 mg here) middle 07/2015 general improving 10/2015 start disastrous too long taper 7mg 11/2015 6mg 12/2015 5mg 1/2016 4mg 2/2016 4mg 3/2016 3mg ->FAIL back to 4mg .... 8/2016 3mg 8/2017 2mg (short wave in summer '17) 8/2018 2mg stable 8/2019 1mg 1/2020 0.6 mg 1/APRIL/2020 0mg FREE! 7/2020 - 10/2020 MILD WAVE(mostly anxiety, poor sleep) 6/2021 - 9/2021 WAVE (anxiety, severe insomnia, total loss of appetite, deep depression, internal restlessness, anhedonia) 0.125g triazolam 2 times 18/03/2022 WAVE (anxiety, severe insomnia, total loss of appetite, PAIN in muscles and nerves, arms and right leg,cannot exercise,hard to walk) 0.125g triazolam 3 times 7/5 rein 0.1mg Link to comment
Marta Posted March 22, 2022 Author Share Posted March 22, 2022 2 nights zero sleep even with a triazolam 0.125 because of anxiety and much pain in an arm that came out of nowhere since days,this pain i think it's anxiety related but it's killing me. I am shaking constantly from anxiety and I thought for the first time to kill myself. After all my effort to build a house and keep a job and a boyfriend. ...i am afraid... I don't know what to do anymore help please. Should i try again tonight with the triazolam? If yes 0.125 or 0.25? How this is possible after 2 yrs off???? @brassmonkey @Altostrata 06/2012 - 02/2015 CIPRALEX 10 mg (for somatic abdominal pain + reflux) - prior to this NOT any significant episode of anxiety/depression on medication: emotional-sexual numbness, total inability to cry, +8 kg, fatigue -> abdominal pain gone 02/2015 - 1/04/2015 tapering from 10 mg to 0 mg doctor advised 05/05/2015 huge anxiety, burning skin sensation, panic, fear, not able to cry again, never-had-before insomnia, totally lost appetite, little loss of vision in one eye, sweating, chest pain, short breath, restlessness, accelerated heartbeat, mild akathisia legs-feet 30/05/2015 reinstated 8mg (I was suggested 5 mg here) middle 07/2015 general improving 10/2015 start disastrous too long taper 7mg 11/2015 6mg 12/2015 5mg 1/2016 4mg 2/2016 4mg 3/2016 3mg ->FAIL back to 4mg .... 8/2016 3mg 8/2017 2mg (short wave in summer '17) 8/2018 2mg stable 8/2019 1mg 1/2020 0.6 mg 1/APRIL/2020 0mg FREE! 7/2020 - 10/2020 MILD WAVE(mostly anxiety, poor sleep) 6/2021 - 9/2021 WAVE (anxiety, severe insomnia, total loss of appetite, deep depression, internal restlessness, anhedonia) 0.125g triazolam 2 times 18/03/2022 WAVE (anxiety, severe insomnia, total loss of appetite, PAIN in muscles and nerves, arms and right leg,cannot exercise,hard to walk) 0.125g triazolam 3 times 7/5 rein 0.1mg Link to comment
Marta Posted March 22, 2022 Author Share Posted March 22, 2022 Please help!! I am sorry if I sound arrogant in asking twice. I am really desperate, believe me! Should i try again tonight with the triazolam? If yes 0.125 or 0.25? I have so much pan in an arm came from nothing. Could it be all this crazy state I am in? Thanks 06/2012 - 02/2015 CIPRALEX 10 mg (for somatic abdominal pain + reflux) - prior to this NOT any significant episode of anxiety/depression on medication: emotional-sexual numbness, total inability to cry, +8 kg, fatigue -> abdominal pain gone 02/2015 - 1/04/2015 tapering from 10 mg to 0 mg doctor advised 05/05/2015 huge anxiety, burning skin sensation, panic, fear, not able to cry again, never-had-before insomnia, totally lost appetite, little loss of vision in one eye, sweating, chest pain, short breath, restlessness, accelerated heartbeat, mild akathisia legs-feet 30/05/2015 reinstated 8mg (I was suggested 5 mg here) middle 07/2015 general improving 10/2015 start disastrous too long taper 7mg 11/2015 6mg 12/2015 5mg 1/2016 4mg 2/2016 4mg 3/2016 3mg ->FAIL back to 4mg .... 8/2016 3mg 8/2017 2mg (short wave in summer '17) 8/2018 2mg stable 8/2019 1mg 1/2020 0.6 mg 1/APRIL/2020 0mg FREE! 7/2020 - 10/2020 MILD WAVE(mostly anxiety, poor sleep) 6/2021 - 9/2021 WAVE (anxiety, severe insomnia, total loss of appetite, deep depression, internal restlessness, anhedonia) 0.125g triazolam 2 times 18/03/2022 WAVE (anxiety, severe insomnia, total loss of appetite, PAIN in muscles and nerves, arms and right leg,cannot exercise,hard to walk) 0.125g triazolam 3 times 7/5 rein 0.1mg Link to comment
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