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SquirrellyGirl: Effexor withdrawal etc


SquirrellyGirl

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  • Moderator Emeritus
47 minutes ago, Altostrata said:

This bead thing is crazy!

No kidding. Solidarity going out to you, my bead-counting friends. 

 

2020: After 18+ years (entire adult life) on Paxil, a dangerous doctor-led "taper" in 2015, and four years tapering off the last 1 mg thanks to SA and the Brassmonkey slide, 

I AM COMPLETELY FREE OF PAXIL! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! Forever.

 

2021: Began conservative, proper, CNS-respecting taper of Zoloft, led by the only expert on me -- me. Making own liquid. 5-10% plus holds.

2022: Holding on Zoloft for now. Current dose 47 mg. Hanging in, hanging on. Severe protracted PAWS, windows and waves. While I may not be doing "a lot" by outside standards, things are graaaaadually getting better

 

Yoga (gentle to medium); walks; daily breath practice; nutrition, fruits/veg; nature; water; EastEnders (lol); practicing self-compassion, self-care; boundaries; connection; allowing feelings; t r u s t ing that I, too, will heal. (--> may need to be reminded of this.)

"You are not alone, and this is not the end of your story." - Baylissa

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Gotta feel like an accountant counting out beads every day lol

Paroxatine - 2004-2006

Effexor XR 75mg 2006 - 2016 (Discontinued Feb 2016) - Withdrawal for 6 months.

Effexor XR 75mg Re-instated June 2017 (Discontinued Dec 2017)

Effexor XR 2-3 mg Re-instated March 10 2018 - 1 day (Didn't work)

Effexor XR 2mg Reinstated (Again) May 11 2018. 6 Beads

July 2018 - 0.0mg of Effexor. Zilch

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Can't say this will apply to everyone's beads, but for what it is worth here is part of my beads/mg table.

 

beads count 18/1/18 mg beads
75mg Venlafaxine  0.3 1.0
samples of 232, 234 0.6 2.0
and 253 (approx) 0.9 3.0
  1.2 4.0
assume 240/75mg 1.6 5.0
  1.9 6.0
  2.2 7.0
  2.5 8.0
  2.8 9.0
  3.1 10.0
  3.4 11.0
  3.7 12.0
  4.1 13.0
  4.4 14.0
  4.7 15.0
  5.0 16.0
  5.3 17.0
  5.6 18.0
  5.9 19.0
  6.2 20.0
  6.6 21.0
  6.9 22.0
  7.2 23.0
  7.5 24.0
  7.8 25.0
  8.1 26.0
  8.4 27.0
  8.8 28.0
  9.1 29.0
  9.4 30.0
  9.7 31.0
  10.0 32.0

Born 1945. 

1999 - First Effexor/Venlafaxine

2016 Withdrawal research. Effexor.  13Jul - 212.5mg;  6Aug - 200.0mg;  24Aug - 187.5mg;  13Sep - 175.0mg;  3Oct - 162.5mg;  26Oct - 150mg 

2017  9Jan - 150.00mg;  23Mar - 137.50mg;  24Apr - 125.00mg;  31May - 112.50mg holding;  3Sep - 100.00mg;  20Sep - 93.75mg;  20Oct - 87.5mg;  12Nov - 81.25mg;  13 Dec - 75.00mg

2018  18Jan - 69.1mg; 16Feb - 62.5mg; 16March - 57.5mg (-8%); 22Apr - 56.3mg(-2%); CRASHED - Updose 29May - 62.5mg; Updose - 1Jul - 75.0mg. Updose - 2Aug - 87.5mg. Updose - 27Aug - 100.0mg. Updose - 11Oct 112.5mg. Updose - 6Nov 125.00mg

2019 Updoses 19 Jan - 150.0mg. 1April - 162.5mg. 24 April - Feeling better - doing tasks, getting outside.  7 May - usual depression questionnaire gives "probably no depression" result.

Supps/Vits  Omega 3;  Chelated Magnesium;  Prebiotics/Probiotics, Vit D3. 

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On 6/11/2018 at 8:20 PM, Lloyd said:

Hi SquirellyGirl,

 

I'm also taking taking 6 beads of Effexor each day for almost 5 weeks. I had been off it for about 6 months and then bad anxiety kicked in and scared the hell out of me so i decided to restart it. 

I find that even the 6 beads has a profound effect - some good impacts and some unpleasant side effects like hot flushes and a clammy feeling. I get the calming effect so i dont feel like im going off a cliff. I find it a struggle to bring the dose up or down - have tried 8 beads but it feels really strong. I have bought a set of 0.001g scales just waiting on delivery. I noticed the beads are of varying sizes and just by looking at them could be anywhere between 1-3x the size of each other. I think i have been playing ping pong with my head due to not taking the exact same amount every day.

Are you using the Effexor XR brand or generic?

 

Hi Lloyd, I am taking the Teva generic XR.  My beads vary in size as well, which is why I also weigh them with the mg scale.  Have you seen this paper that explains that at 5 or so mg our serotonin receptors are still blocked by 50%? That's still a very large amount which is why it is so important to crawl off this drug!

 

https://ils.unc.edu/bmh/neoref/this.dir.unneeded/schizophrenia/review/tmp/352.pdf

Started ADs back around 1995 after bad break-up, starting with Prozac.  Switched to Wellbutrin, and then to Effexor in 2002
Effexor XR 2002-2014 up to 225 mg at one point, down to 37.5 mg towards end but back up to 75 mg in 2014; now realize I had W/D as I dropped down, memory very poor about history.  Extreme emotions, poor concentration as I stepped back down, didn't connect the dots!
Summer 2014 reduced to 0 very quickly, was sick of anhedonia/sexual dysfunction due to meds, depression never controlled if not worse. Didn't recognize WD since symptoms built slowly (thought I had ADD! and menopausal on top of it), starting with severe sweats, very bad cog-fog and memory issues, culminating in weight loss, severe anxiety and depression, panic, severe apathy and insomnia by eight months off.  Saw p-doc who put me on Remeron, increased from 7.5 mg/day to 37.5 mg by May 22, 2015; still doing very badly though able to sleep.

June 1. 2015 Reinstated Effexor XR 37.5 mg, Remeron dropped to 30 mg PM. Immediate relief of symptoms, like nothing had ever happened!  Joined SA and began on advice of friend who recognized it was WD all along! Began tapering in July 2015.

Been tapering both meds ever since, focusing on one more than the other or doing no more than 5% of each per month.

12 mg Effexor and 5.8 mg Remeron (mirtazapine SolTabs to make a solution with OraPlus) as of 5/4/2017 

Update 3/14/18: 2.9 mg Remeron and 6 mg Effexor; 6/10/18:  2.6 mg Remeron and 4.9 mg Effexor

 

My intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9313-squirrellygirl-effexor-withdrawal-etc/page-2#entry196679

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

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  • 3 weeks later...
  • Moderator Emeritus
On 6/11/2018 at 8:20 PM, Lloyd said:

Hi SquirellyGirl,

 

I'm also taking taking 6 beads of Effexor each day for almost 5 weeks. I had been off it for about 6 months and then bad anxiety kicked in and scared the hell out of me so i decided to restart it. 

I find that even the 6 beads has a profound effect - some good impacts and some unpleasant side effects like hot flushes and a clammy feeling. I get the calming effect so i dont feel like im going off a cliff. I find it a struggle to bring the dose up or down - have tried 8 beads but it feels really strong. I have bought a set of 0.001g scales just waiting on delivery. I noticed the beads are of varying sizes and just by looking at them could be anywhere between 1-3x the size of each other. I think i have been playing ping pong with my head due to not taking the exact same amount every day.

Are you using the Effexor XR brand or generic?

Hi Lloyd, I'm sorry I didn't respond in a timely manner.

 

My brand of beads was Teva generic XR, and yes, they could vary in size considerably which is why I weighed in addition to counting.  I found my scale quite frustrating because it would bounce around by 2 or 3 mgs after taring and recalibrating.  I actually bought a more expensive scale midway in my taper, but it was worse! Then I bought another Gemini20 with the flat pan instead of the dish, and I bought little plastic weigh boats to use on the pan.  Still, the fluctuation issue came back and after three years of that, I'd had enough!

 

So, now I have successfully transitioned to immediate release liquid, dosed twice a day!  I had a couple of days of ick mood, irritable, but I'm sleeping well for the most part and nothing too extreme has come up, just occasional head aches.

 

I hear you on the horrific anxiety in WD, Lloyd.  I have always probably had a sort of anxious way of going, overthinking and worrying about stuff, or situational, but not a "body feel" like I've had in withdrawal, and never to the degree I had anxiety and doom in protracted withdrawal!  Now I have the occasional body pangs of anxiety and I know it isn't "me."

 

As Brassmonkey says (I think), we are in our withdrawal "normal."  I may not be having withdrawal symptoms that are intolerable, but I can't say I'm having joyous windows either.  Just in a chronic anhedonia state which isn't horrible, but sure would be nice to enjoy life more.  Hoping that will come. 

 

Problem is, I've got the low energy-low motivation thing going on all the time, making it hard to "fake it 'til you make it."  Also, I guess I'm just too aware of the horrors going on in the world and am affected by that knowledge.  Climate change is a big one for me, and I can't get away from it because where I live we are having a 10+  day stretch of triple digits, when triple digit heat was very occasional here in the past.  It is oppressive and scary, that it will only get worse.  My home town Santa Barbara is suffering yet another devastating fire, and had 110 degree F, an historical record.   When I was a kid it was rare to get over 90 in the summer.  This stuff is upsetting to me and all I can do is try to distract myself; I am not yet able to "accept" that this is how it is going to be, now.  Just having trouble finding positivity.

 

SG

 

 

Started ADs back around 1995 after bad break-up, starting with Prozac.  Switched to Wellbutrin, and then to Effexor in 2002
Effexor XR 2002-2014 up to 225 mg at one point, down to 37.5 mg towards end but back up to 75 mg in 2014; now realize I had W/D as I dropped down, memory very poor about history.  Extreme emotions, poor concentration as I stepped back down, didn't connect the dots!
Summer 2014 reduced to 0 very quickly, was sick of anhedonia/sexual dysfunction due to meds, depression never controlled if not worse. Didn't recognize WD since symptoms built slowly (thought I had ADD! and menopausal on top of it), starting with severe sweats, very bad cog-fog and memory issues, culminating in weight loss, severe anxiety and depression, panic, severe apathy and insomnia by eight months off.  Saw p-doc who put me on Remeron, increased from 7.5 mg/day to 37.5 mg by May 22, 2015; still doing very badly though able to sleep.

June 1. 2015 Reinstated Effexor XR 37.5 mg, Remeron dropped to 30 mg PM. Immediate relief of symptoms, like nothing had ever happened!  Joined SA and began on advice of friend who recognized it was WD all along! Began tapering in July 2015.

Been tapering both meds ever since, focusing on one more than the other or doing no more than 5% of each per month.

12 mg Effexor and 5.8 mg Remeron (mirtazapine SolTabs to make a solution with OraPlus) as of 5/4/2017 

Update 3/14/18: 2.9 mg Remeron and 6 mg Effexor; 6/10/18:  2.6 mg Remeron and 4.9 mg Effexor

 

My intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9313-squirrellygirl-effexor-withdrawal-etc/page-2#entry196679

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

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I bought some 0.001g scales but gave up on trying to weigh the tiny ammount of beads i was taking. Have stopped taking any beads for the time being (2.5 weeks ago) as i wasnt able to settle on how many beads i should take and i kept fiddling with the doseage. Couldnt tell what symptons were side effects, anxiety or withdrawl so i though best just to leave it alone for the time being and stop playing yo yo with my brain. I got up to 8 beads at one point. I found it hard to increase the dose beyond that.

I think the hardest part of this is being able to determine whats withdrawl (if any?), anxiety or side effects from medications. Its just such a jumble of physical symptons that are constantly changing. 

I have a specialist appointment with a mental health doctor next month who is supposed to be familiar with discontinuation syndrome. 2 months waiting for an appointment. sigh. Hopefully she will be able to provide some help.

 

The worst symptons for me is the feeling 'out of it / spaced out' all the time and the concentration issues. If i didnt have those problems i feel i could handle this allot easier. How is this for you - do you have the awful brain fog or derealization?

 

I also carry allot of stuff on my shoulders and i read the news way too much - its depressing. I'm also pretty worried about global warming although hot days are normal for us in australia. Im living rural (farming) so we are used to the bushfire threat - dosent make it any less scary though and ive been through 2 bad fires in the last 18 years. I have an 18 month old daughter and i often wonder what kind of world she will grow up in.

 

Low motivation sucks and yes the 'fake it till you make it' is exhausting. Fortunatley i have a manager (and his manager) who understands what's happening and have been very supportive. Most other work places i would have been shuffled out by now. Are you working? How do you keep yourself going at work?

Paroxatine - 2004-2006

Effexor XR 75mg 2006 - 2016 (Discontinued Feb 2016) - Withdrawal for 6 months.

Effexor XR 75mg Re-instated June 2017 (Discontinued Dec 2017)

Effexor XR 2-3 mg Re-instated March 10 2018 - 1 day (Didn't work)

Effexor XR 2mg Reinstated (Again) May 11 2018. 6 Beads

July 2018 - 0.0mg of Effexor. Zilch

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3 hours ago, Lloyd said:

I bought some 0.001g scales but gave up on trying to weigh the tiny ammount of beads i was taking. Have stopped taking any beads for the time being (2.5 weeks ago) as i wasnt able to settle on how many beads i should take and i kept fiddling with the doseage. Couldnt tell what symptons were side effects, anxiety or withdrawl so i though best just to leave it alone for the time being and stop playing yo yo with my brain. I got up to 8 beads at one point. I found it hard to increase the dose beyond that.

I think the hardest part of this is being able to determine whats withdrawl (if any?), anxiety or side effects from medications. Its just such a jumble of physical symptons that are constantly changing. 

I have a specialist appointment with a mental health doctor next month who is supposed to be familiar with discontinuation syndrome. 2 months waiting for an appointment. sigh. Hopefully she will be able to provide some help.

 

The worst symptons for me is the feeling 'out of it / spaced out' all the time and the concentration issues. If i didnt have those problems i feel i could handle this allot easier. How is this for you - do you have the awful brain fog or derealization?

 

I also carry allot of stuff on my shoulders and i read the news way too much - its depressing. I'm also pretty worried about global warming although hot days are normal for us in australia. Im living rural (farming) so we are used to the bushfire threat - dosent make it any less scary though and ive been through 2 bad fires in the last 18 years. I have an 18 month old daughter and i often wonder what kind of world she will grow up in.

 

Low motivation sucks and yes the 'fake it till you make it' is exhausting. Fortunatley i have a manager (and his manager) who understands what's happening and have been very supportive. Most other work places i would have been shuffled out by now. Are you working? How do you keep yourself going at work?

Sorry for the interruption,hi Lloyd ,you need to practice stop watching the news ,I hate it beyond belief ,we can never get a break from the misery and then our nervous systems are being disrupted by these messages,in withdrawl its even worse .

maybe just listen to local area news to keep up with local issues when needed.

A lot of people would love the area you live ,being away from busy society is amazing but needed obviously for work .

We don't have the monopoly these days on misery ,its just the fact we have 24 hour news and media .going back through history ,there  was always serious issues with human beings .

Don't worry yourself sick ,keep learning what serves your purpose ,take up a new hobby other than watching the news ,sometimes I wont to throw away my smart phone but for now when im walking in nature I turn it off .its a start .

Take care . 

Alcohol free since February 2015 

1MG diazepam

4.5MG PROZAC.

 

 

 

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  • 3 weeks later...
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Last week was horrible.  I'd been doing ok but on Tuesday I had a stressor hit me and I went down the tubes into depression.  I'd been reflecting on the fact that I've had anhedonia for most of my AD use to varying degrees, but in the three years during tapering it has gotten worse.  I kept calling it low motivation but even when I didn't feel depressed,  I still had no interest or couldn't sustain interest beyond three minutes.  No desire to travel anywhere, see people, talk on the phone with loved ones, etc.  No excitement.  This existed to a lesser degree when on higher dosages of meds, but even then I had the emotional numbing, which amounted to being rather disconnected with loved ones to the point I didn't care and seemed like a self-absorbed narcissist, I'm sure.  I remember it being my mom's birthday but I forgot about it all the way to the end of the day and when I finally called I could tell my family were really annoyed with me.  I lost interest in holidays because it felt too taxing to buy Christmas presents or birthday presents, too taxing to buy cards to send.  Birthdays and holidays cause me stress because I am "supposed" to care and get gifts and cards.

 

Anyway, now I don't get joy from things I used to care about, my dogs, my horses, my herding hobby. The heat wave has been atrocious here and every summer I go into anxiety about climate change because the weather is so absolutely horrible here with the heat, so that was a double whammy last week.  On Tuesday I felt very much "what is the point" and could say "I hate my life."  I realized my dream when we moved to our little rancho, always wanted a place of our own where I could have the animals...and now it all feels like a huge burden.

 

I also had some amalgam fillings replaced earlier in the month, and this left me with intense pain in my teeth that got so bad I thought I had a tooth abscess.  It has gotten slightly better, but right now my teeth are throbbing again. I've been pounding the NSAIDs.  I wonder if I am having a reaction to the anesthetic and/or bonding/composite materials. They did a blood compatibility test and chose materials I didn't have a response to, but maybe exposure has made me  sensitive!  Headaches, too.  They did the removal correctly, with a dental dam and filters, activated charcoal, a special vitamin C, but maybe this is part of my going down the tubes.  When I had my urine tested for heavy metals my mercury level was right at the cusp of going into "high," and on the dental material testing I was found to be highly reactive to mercury.  I feel it is the right thing to do in the long run, but feeling discouraged that doing something "good" for me has led me to more suffering.  I still have a couple more teeth to go but am postponing until my mouth feels better and I am solid.

 

I am now taking the venlafaxine liquid three times a day on the theory that maybe I have inter-dose withdrawal, but I know these external stresses have tossed me on top of the switch to liquid.

 

I was doing better as of Saturday but now I am sick with another upper respiratory bug and feel like crap.  I long to feel better and alive!

 

SG

Started ADs back around 1995 after bad break-up, starting with Prozac.  Switched to Wellbutrin, and then to Effexor in 2002
Effexor XR 2002-2014 up to 225 mg at one point, down to 37.5 mg towards end but back up to 75 mg in 2014; now realize I had W/D as I dropped down, memory very poor about history.  Extreme emotions, poor concentration as I stepped back down, didn't connect the dots!
Summer 2014 reduced to 0 very quickly, was sick of anhedonia/sexual dysfunction due to meds, depression never controlled if not worse. Didn't recognize WD since symptoms built slowly (thought I had ADD! and menopausal on top of it), starting with severe sweats, very bad cog-fog and memory issues, culminating in weight loss, severe anxiety and depression, panic, severe apathy and insomnia by eight months off.  Saw p-doc who put me on Remeron, increased from 7.5 mg/day to 37.5 mg by May 22, 2015; still doing very badly though able to sleep.

June 1. 2015 Reinstated Effexor XR 37.5 mg, Remeron dropped to 30 mg PM. Immediate relief of symptoms, like nothing had ever happened!  Joined SA and began on advice of friend who recognized it was WD all along! Began tapering in July 2015.

Been tapering both meds ever since, focusing on one more than the other or doing no more than 5% of each per month.

12 mg Effexor and 5.8 mg Remeron (mirtazapine SolTabs to make a solution with OraPlus) as of 5/4/2017 

Update 3/14/18: 2.9 mg Remeron and 6 mg Effexor; 6/10/18:  2.6 mg Remeron and 4.9 mg Effexor

 

My intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9313-squirrellygirl-effexor-withdrawal-etc/page-2#entry196679

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

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Sympathies, S.Girl. OX.

I can relate to a lot of what you say.

Last 3 days in a row I had an MRI scan, dental visit and cataract examination with stinging eye drops and having to travel back home (as passenger) in glaring sunshine everyone should be enjoying.

Today I have one of most painful cold sores on top lip of last few years.

Yes, we are too fragile for this world and ADs!

Hang in there, though, lady!

Love and best wishes

peng.

Born 1945. 

1999 - First Effexor/Venlafaxine

2016 Withdrawal research. Effexor.  13Jul - 212.5mg;  6Aug - 200.0mg;  24Aug - 187.5mg;  13Sep - 175.0mg;  3Oct - 162.5mg;  26Oct - 150mg 

2017  9Jan - 150.00mg;  23Mar - 137.50mg;  24Apr - 125.00mg;  31May - 112.50mg holding;  3Sep - 100.00mg;  20Sep - 93.75mg;  20Oct - 87.5mg;  12Nov - 81.25mg;  13 Dec - 75.00mg

2018  18Jan - 69.1mg; 16Feb - 62.5mg; 16March - 57.5mg (-8%); 22Apr - 56.3mg(-2%); CRASHED - Updose 29May - 62.5mg; Updose - 1Jul - 75.0mg. Updose - 2Aug - 87.5mg. Updose - 27Aug - 100.0mg. Updose - 11Oct 112.5mg. Updose - 6Nov 125.00mg

2019 Updoses 19 Jan - 150.0mg. 1April - 162.5mg. 24 April - Feeling better - doing tasks, getting outside.  7 May - usual depression questionnaire gives "probably no depression" result.

Supps/Vits  Omega 3;  Chelated Magnesium;  Prebiotics/Probiotics, Vit D3. 

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I can relate too.

 

The "inner child" enjoyment of life I used to experience (pre-med) just isn't there; even when doing "fun" stuff.

 

Agree also re: the news not helping with mood.

 

 

Dose History: 19 Feb 2014 - Escitalopram 10mg daily June 2015 - Started taper, 5mg every other day July 2015 - 5mg every 2 days August 2015 - 5mg every 3 days September 2015 - 5mg every 4 days Sept 14th - Completed tapering, but at 7 weeks "drug free" I suffered serious WD symptoms as a consequence of "incorrect" tapering. Nov 25 2015 - Re-instated Cipralex @ 2.5mg daily. WD symptoms faded. Held at this dose and experienced "windows and waves". 12 Oct 2017 Reduced dose to 1.25mg. 13 Mar 2018 Reduced dose to 0.625mg (approx.). 16 April 2018 0mg. Windows and waves triggered by stress (IBS/reflux, headaches, sinus issues) Aug 2019 Mirena coil fitted 6 Jan 2020 MAJOR Wave hit 19 months following last dose (protracted WD).  Symptoms listed below Mar 2020 Mirena coil removal.

Therapy: Nov 15th 2016 Re-started therapy Jan 19th 2017 Started CBT Dec 2017 Started listening to Hypnotherapy CD (self-esteem). Nov 2019 Started couples therapy.

Supplements: "Bioglan" Biotic Balance Ultimate Flora 10 billion CFU, live Bacteria, Probiotic, suitable for Vegetarians, with Lactobacillus Acidophilus, Lactobacillus Rhamnosus, Bifidobacterium Longum"Pukka" Vitalise a unique blend of 30 energising botanicals.

Diet: 16 April 2018 Detox cleanse / anti-candida for 90 days. Jan 2020 Started "small plate" diet (i.e child size portions).

Exercise: Stretching, Yoga, Pilates, Spinning, Elliptical/upper body workout, walking.

Medical Test Results: 4 Jan 2017 Homeopathic Treatment starts 24 Feb 2017 Started weight loss program 24 Mar 2017 Naturopathic Treatment + anti-Candida diet started due to suspected Candida Related Complex (CRC). DETOXED for 7 weeks to "re-set" gut. April 2017 "Genova Diagnostics" Comprehensive Stool Analysis NEGATIVE; Full Blood Count (Normal) / Blood Cholesterol: 5.6 (Borderline) / Blood Sugar (Normal) / 28 Jun 2017 FSH 8.2 / 14 Nov 2017 FSH 17.7 Dec 2017 Blood Cholesterol: 3.9 (Normal) / Kidney Function (Normal) / Blood Sugar (Normal). December 2017 "Genova Diagnostics" Food panel allergy (bloodwork) analysis - a few "VERY LOW/VL" allergens; Mar 2018 "Genova Diagnostics" SIBO urine analysis: High Level of Yeast/fungal markers found in small intestine but NO SIBO.  April 2018 Thyroid (Normal) / Full Blood Count (Normal) / FSH (Normal). 16 April 2018 Started anti-Candida diet - 3 month protocol.   25 March 2020 All test results "Normal". CRP" 5 mg/L (normal range to 0-5 mg/L).

Symptoms:  Flu-like symptoms, anxiety, anhedonia, sinus headaches right-side (severe), IBS issues/reflux (severe)**, tinnitus, fatigue, inner tremor, nausea, chills/hot flushes, pounding heart, muscular issues including stiff left hip flexor, intense anger, PSSD (ongoing).  **Histhamine intolerance (suspected).

Major Life Events: 

Re-located to UK from Canada: Jan 2016

My father died: 5:05pm, Monday 5 Feb 2018 Last Lexapro dose: 16 April 2018 (its now been over a year since I quit ADs)  Moved house: Friday 23rd February 2018  "Divorced" toxic Mother: Monday 26 March 2018 Starting working again: 19 November 2018  Diagnosed with: 5th August 2021 PTSD/C-PTSD Diagnosed with: March 2022 Interstitial Cystitis (IC)/Painful bladder syndrome

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Hi SquirrellyGirl, 

I'm so sorry you are feeling so bad.  Dental work is so traumatic.  I'm sure that set off something tough to endure.  I hope you can do something calming for yourself.  I'll be thinking about you.

Rosetta

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/16629-rosetta-ct-may-2011-too-fast-taper-feb-2017/?page=25

2001-2011 Celexa 10 mg raised to 40 mg then 60 mg over this time period

May 2011 OB Doctor's Cold switch Celexa 60 mg to 10 mg Zoloft sertraline (baby born)

2012-2016 - Doctors raised dose of Zoloft up to 150 mg

2016 - Xanax prescribed - as needed - 0.5 mg about every 3 days (bad reaction)

2016 - Stopped Xanax

Late 2016- Began (too fast) taper of Zoloft

Early 2017 - Trazodone prescribed for bedtime (doseage unknown)

Feb 2017 - Completed taper/stopped Trazodone

Drug free since Feb 2017

2017 - Unisom otc very rarely for sleep

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  • 2 weeks later...

Got an MRI (Head) booked for next week along with some blood tests for autoimmune, cortisol response and a few others, will know the results end of the month. Sort of hoping something comes up (and not). I'll let you know how it goes.

Paroxatine - 2004-2006

Effexor XR 75mg 2006 - 2016 (Discontinued Feb 2016) - Withdrawal for 6 months.

Effexor XR 75mg Re-instated June 2017 (Discontinued Dec 2017)

Effexor XR 2-3 mg Re-instated March 10 2018 - 1 day (Didn't work)

Effexor XR 2mg Reinstated (Again) May 11 2018. 6 Beads

July 2018 - 0.0mg of Effexor. Zilch

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  • 1 month later...
  • Moderator Emeritus

Hmm, haven't been here since July and things have changed.  I was doing so poorly on the liquid that I finally caved and went back to beads, albeit 10 mg pill weight, 3.75 mg.  I'd been on 4.4 mg liquid, maybe less, don't remember.  But when I took the beads, albeit less, I felt MUCH BETTER! That change was a month ago.  It's almost as if the liquid wasn't working at all.

 

I've been wavy the last five days.  Still bouncing, I guess. It helps to look these posts over and step back from feeling bad about feeling bad.  I'd been trying to build my business but things slowed down again and I was feeling bad about that, but I think I'm putting too much expectation on myself.  I keep forgetting that my primary job is to heal and get off this stuff.  Hard after three years with more to go.  Just a big chunk of life on hold.  Trying to live it meanwhile but still have no motivation.

 

I appreciate the folks who stopped by.  Peng, Lloyd, Rosetta, how you all doing?

 

SG

Started ADs back around 1995 after bad break-up, starting with Prozac.  Switched to Wellbutrin, and then to Effexor in 2002
Effexor XR 2002-2014 up to 225 mg at one point, down to 37.5 mg towards end but back up to 75 mg in 2014; now realize I had W/D as I dropped down, memory very poor about history.  Extreme emotions, poor concentration as I stepped back down, didn't connect the dots!
Summer 2014 reduced to 0 very quickly, was sick of anhedonia/sexual dysfunction due to meds, depression never controlled if not worse. Didn't recognize WD since symptoms built slowly (thought I had ADD! and menopausal on top of it), starting with severe sweats, very bad cog-fog and memory issues, culminating in weight loss, severe anxiety and depression, panic, severe apathy and insomnia by eight months off.  Saw p-doc who put me on Remeron, increased from 7.5 mg/day to 37.5 mg by May 22, 2015; still doing very badly though able to sleep.

June 1. 2015 Reinstated Effexor XR 37.5 mg, Remeron dropped to 30 mg PM. Immediate relief of symptoms, like nothing had ever happened!  Joined SA and began on advice of friend who recognized it was WD all along! Began tapering in July 2015.

Been tapering both meds ever since, focusing on one more than the other or doing no more than 5% of each per month.

12 mg Effexor and 5.8 mg Remeron (mirtazapine SolTabs to make a solution with OraPlus) as of 5/4/2017 

Update 3/14/18: 2.9 mg Remeron and 6 mg Effexor; 6/10/18:  2.6 mg Remeron and 4.9 mg Effexor

 

My intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9313-squirrellygirl-effexor-withdrawal-etc/page-2#entry196679

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

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1 hour ago, SquirrellyGirl said:

I'd been trying to build my business but things slowed down again and I was feeling bad about that, but I think I'm putting too much expectation on myself.  I keep forgetting that my primary job is to heal and get off this stuff.  Hard after three years with more to go.  Just a big chunk of life on hold.  Trying to live it meanwhile but still have no motivation.

Wow, thanks for sharing that, @SquirrellyGirl. I've been doing nothing on my business and just sitting dogs to make ends meet. I feel so ashamed when with successful peers. Ugh. Anyways, thanks and so glad that the beads are helping you. That is awesome.

  • Prozac | late 2004-mid-2005 | CT WD in a couple months, mostly emotional
  • Sertraline 50-100mg | 11/2011-3/2014, 10/2014-3/2017
  • Sertraline fast taper March 2017, 4 weeks, OFF sertraline April 1, 2017
  • Quit alcohol May 20, 2017
  • Lifestyle changes: AA, kundalini yoga

 

"If you've seen a monster, even if it's horrible, that's evidence of divinity." – Damien Echols

 

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Hi SG-- I'm so glad that the medication is sorting itself out.  Bummer about the liquid, but it's great that you've sorted things out and the tablets are working well. There's something about the liquid that just doesn't work for some people.

 

((((((((((HUGS)))))))))

 

Brass

20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013.

Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks.  The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better.

Final Dose 0.016mg.     Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017

 

"It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general."  Stephen Hawking

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Hi SG, glad to hear the beads are working for you a bit better than the liquid. I asked my Psychiatrist if we could get liquid but hasn't come back to me about it. Bead counting was hard =(

Tired reinstating again last week but got nausea and gave up after a few days.  Feeling positive at the moment which is great!

Paroxatine - 2004-2006

Effexor XR 75mg 2006 - 2016 (Discontinued Feb 2016) - Withdrawal for 6 months.

Effexor XR 75mg Re-instated June 2017 (Discontinued Dec 2017)

Effexor XR 2-3 mg Re-instated March 10 2018 - 1 day (Didn't work)

Effexor XR 2mg Reinstated (Again) May 11 2018. 6 Beads

July 2018 - 0.0mg of Effexor. Zilch

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Oh and all the tests i got came back perfect! In fact the doc said she'd never seen a better set of extensive test results in all her career! Was almost kind of hoping it would show something, but am glad its all clear.

Paroxatine - 2004-2006

Effexor XR 75mg 2006 - 2016 (Discontinued Feb 2016) - Withdrawal for 6 months.

Effexor XR 75mg Re-instated June 2017 (Discontinued Dec 2017)

Effexor XR 2-3 mg Re-instated March 10 2018 - 1 day (Didn't work)

Effexor XR 2mg Reinstated (Again) May 11 2018. 6 Beads

July 2018 - 0.0mg of Effexor. Zilch

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On 9/12/2018 at 4:00 PM, FarmGirlWorks said:

Wow, thanks for sharing that, @SquirrellyGirl. I've been doing nothing on my business and just sitting dogs to make ends meet. I feel so ashamed when with successful peers. Ugh. Anyways, thanks and so glad that the beads are helping you. That is awesome.

FarmGirlWorks, I'm sorry I didn't reply promptly, but I wanted to say I could REALLY relate to this!  Lately, I haven't felt so insecure with others, as the comparing isn't as bad as it once was.  I try not to go on Facebook since I get triggered there by comparing to others.  I have new friends who are supportive and accepting of me as I am, which helps.

 

I started seeing a new therapist who does EMDR and had one session of that with her.  I was hoping it would kick me out of anhedonia.  We discussed my procrastination and self judgement, and anxiety around having a dirty cluttered home yet not having the energy or inclination to do anything about it.  She told me she herself uses a professional organizer to help her go through her piles periodically, and the Organizer has a daughter who cleans house and so she hires her as well.  The daughter lives near me!  So, I hired the organizer who came out once so far and it was so helpful!  I met her daughter, who can also help with pet sitting.  I was having such insomnia recently and with early waking my mind would fret over not being able to get away because we don't have a reliable sitter.  Well, after meeting Kim, I felt such relief that I was able to sleep better!

 

It was so liberating to acknowledge that I have the ability to earn money doing what I can do, my herding instruction, so that I can pay someone else to help me do what I can't or won't do due to low mo.   It was so nice to have permission to do that!

 

And so that brings me to why I checked in today.  I haven't been on here lately because I'm doing OK!  A friend who knows my situation asked me yesterday how I really was feeling, and I realized a) the anhedonia hasn't been so bad and b) I haven't been obsessing about withdrawal and tapering at all!  I've actually been living!  I'm still tapering and things could go wonky at any time, but for now, I am not NEEDING to be here and that is a good thing!  I think that is why so many disappear off of SA. They begin to live their lives again and don't NEED to be here.  And that. Is. A. Good. Thing! 

 

Keep the hope, my friends!

 

SG

Started ADs back around 1995 after bad break-up, starting with Prozac.  Switched to Wellbutrin, and then to Effexor in 2002
Effexor XR 2002-2014 up to 225 mg at one point, down to 37.5 mg towards end but back up to 75 mg in 2014; now realize I had W/D as I dropped down, memory very poor about history.  Extreme emotions, poor concentration as I stepped back down, didn't connect the dots!
Summer 2014 reduced to 0 very quickly, was sick of anhedonia/sexual dysfunction due to meds, depression never controlled if not worse. Didn't recognize WD since symptoms built slowly (thought I had ADD! and menopausal on top of it), starting with severe sweats, very bad cog-fog and memory issues, culminating in weight loss, severe anxiety and depression, panic, severe apathy and insomnia by eight months off.  Saw p-doc who put me on Remeron, increased from 7.5 mg/day to 37.5 mg by May 22, 2015; still doing very badly though able to sleep.

June 1. 2015 Reinstated Effexor XR 37.5 mg, Remeron dropped to 30 mg PM. Immediate relief of symptoms, like nothing had ever happened!  Joined SA and began on advice of friend who recognized it was WD all along! Began tapering in July 2015.

Been tapering both meds ever since, focusing on one more than the other or doing no more than 5% of each per month.

12 mg Effexor and 5.8 mg Remeron (mirtazapine SolTabs to make a solution with OraPlus) as of 5/4/2017 

Update 3/14/18: 2.9 mg Remeron and 6 mg Effexor; 6/10/18:  2.6 mg Remeron and 4.9 mg Effexor

 

My intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9313-squirrellygirl-effexor-withdrawal-etc/page-2#entry196679

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

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It was beautiful to read this update :) so happy to hear about all the positive developments. I started reading your posts from before summer and this one now is a reminder to all of us that we can turn the corner (and that worrying about tapering and how much longer it is going to take is a WD symptom!

 

I love how you gave yourself a gift of help and saw is as a trade off instead of blaming yourself and feeling bad bailout things which are just not your thing. You turned your focus on what you are good at and that created that I'm ok the way I am and feel good about myself vibe.

 

Thank you for sharing :)

Current: 9/2022 Xanax 0.08, Lexapro 2

2020 Xanax 0.26 (down from 2 mg in 2013), Lexapro 2.85 mg (down from 5 mg 2013)

Amitriptyline (tricyclic AD) and clonazepam for 3 months to treat headache in 1996 
1999. - present Xanax prn up to 3 mg.
2000-2005 Prozac CT twice, 2005-2010 Zoloft CT 3 times, 2010-2013 Escitalopram 10 mg
went from 2.5 to zero on 7 Aug 2013, bad crash 40 days after
reinstated to 5 mg Escitalopram 4Oct 2013 and holding liquid Xanax every 5 hours
28 Jan 2014 Xanax 1.9, 18 Apr  2015 1 mg,  25 June 2015 Lex 4.8, 6 Aug Lexapro 4.6, 1 Jan 2016 0.64  Xanax     9 month hold

24 Sept 2016 4.5 Lex, 17 Oct 4.4 Lex (Nov 0.63 Xanax, Dec 0.625 Xanax), 1 Jan 2017 4.3 Lex, 24 Jan 4.2, 5 Feb 4.1, 24 Mar 4 mg, 10 Apr 3.9 mg, May 3.85, June 3.8, July 3.75, 22 July 3.7, 15 Aug 3.65, 17 Sept 3.6, 1 Jan 2018 3.55, 19 Jan 3.5, 16 Mar 3.4, 14 Apr 3.3, 23 May 3.2, 16 June 3.15, 15 Jul 3.1, 31 Jul 3, 21 Aug 2.9 26 Sept 2.85, 14 Nov Xan 0.61, 1 Dec 0.59, 19 Dec 0.58, 4 Jan 0.565, 6 Feb 0.55, 20 Feb 0.535, 1 Mar 0.505, 10 Mar 0.475, 14 Mar 0.45, 4 Apr 0.415, 13 Apr 0.37, 21 Apr 0.33, 29 Apr 0.29, 10 May 0.27, 17 May 0.25, 28 May 0.22, 19 June 0.22, 21 Jun updose to 0.24, 24 Jun updose to 0.26

Supplements: Omega 3 + Vit E, Vit C, D, magnesium, Taurine, probiotic 

I'm not a medical professional. Any advice I give is based on my own experience and reading. 

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Really wonderful update SG. I think it can be so important to ask for and be willing to receive help. There have been quite a few times where I felt overwhelmed by large maintenance tasks in the house or garden. Getting help on these really made a difference, including a boost to continue on with other jobs.

 

I've been using these self-hypnosis programs for many years. When I start getting back into procrastination, I pull them out and listen a few times. Within a day or 2, I start noticing changes.https://www.hppcds.com/product_p/1-929043-09-0d.htm 

I've also had very good success with the self-esteem ones https://www.hppcds.com/product_p/1-929043-13-9d.htm

The only thing I'd say about their use is that they don't seem to work well when I'm feeling very agitated. But other than that, I've often listened right before bed and fall asleep listening. Still seem to get the same benefits from them.

 

Best of luck with your work and continued tapering. Sounds like you're doing really well with things.

 

 

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium, Methyl B. What has helped me most: spending time in nature, qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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On 10/25/2018 at 9:39 AM, freespirit said:

 

I've been using these self-hypnosis programs for many years. When I start getting back into procrastination, I pull them out and listen a few times. Within a day or 2, I start noticing changes.https://www.hppcds.com/product_p/1-929043-09-0d.htm 

I've also had very good success with the self-esteem ones https://www.hppcds.com/product_p/1-929043-13-9d.htm

The only thing I'd say about their use is that they don't seem to work well when I'm feeling very agitated. But other than that, I've often listened right before bed and fall asleep listening. Still seem to get the same benefits from them.

 

Hi freespirit! Sorry it has been so long to acknowledge your post but I appreciate the tip!  I'm going to check it out!  

 

Nice to hear from you, Bubble!

 

I'm doing ok at the moment, though frustrated with the bead-weighing process since I just measured out a week's worth of 2.6 mg doses (three beads) and then three weeks of the next dose, also 2 to 3 beads depending on their size.  And yes, there's enough variation in the size of the venlafaxine beads that I have to hunt for the perfect combination to get a 1 mg gross weight difference!  That's the best I can do, even though at this point 1 mg amounts to a 15% cut!  My neck was killing me by the end of the weighing session!  Add to this the fact that my Gemini scale is all over the place, so let's just say that prepping my doses is a nightmare and something I dread doing!

 

At least the mirtazapine taper (now at 1.7 mg) is easy with the liquid made from SolTabs.

 

I tried doing therapy, EMDR, for a few sessions, hoping it would kick start me out of anhedonia, but my memory is so bad, I'd forget to do what the therapist told me to do.  One simple task:  write down three good things a day.  I can't even remember to do that.   It is hard for me to even identify three good things.  My life isn't bad, but I seem to be incapable or registering/noticing the good or pleasurable.  I chalk this down to the anhedonia, though it hasn't been as bad of late as it can be.  I have abandoned the therapy sessions for the moment as I don't think I'm capable of benefiting from them at the moment.  Plus, I'm not sure that therapist was the best fit.  I liked her as an individual but didn't feel like much was happening in the work with her.  My expectations were probably unrealistic.  I know that I have issues that come from childhood and pre-drug lack of coping mechanisms, but I will revisit when I am finally done with my tapers, I guess.

 

Meditation is something that I also haven't had the discipline to follow through with.   The one thing I have done that can help, which is mindfulness of a sort, is tapping.  I feel it really does have an impact on my nervous system in the way of calming.  I have tennis elbow at the moment that wakes me up at night, and tapping for pain seems to settle it and allow me to fall back asleep.

 

My waves are of the emotional variety, feeling down, some anxiety, low energy and zero motivation.  Tapping helps, when I remember to do it.  My work days are better because having students come for herding lessons forces me to get up and out, and then there is the social contact with them, which is good for me since the rest of the time I am isolated.  I'm not religious so don't have church as a source of social contact and support.  Not that I haven't tried in the past, but religion just doesn't stick with me.  The days I don't have students have been hardest as the low mo stalls me out and then I feel bad.  The to-do list hovers and yet I can't get going on it.  I've really got to check out those audios!

 

My main physical symptoms are hot flashes/mild burning skin, especially at night.  Not sure if that is WD or remnants of menopause.  When I was in protracted WD from Effexor four years ago, I also stopped the BCP because I figured I was probably menopausal at that age, as my mother and sister were early, and my god, the hot flashes and sweats and burning skin, especially at night, were abominable!  I know that can come with Effexor WD as well as menopause so perhaps a double whammy.  Today's version is much more tolerable but still happens.  I use wild-yam sourced progesterone which I think helps a bit, so maybe primarily caused by menopause. 

 

I have had moments that give me hope, such as being able to laugh to the point of tears watching Something About Mary recently.

 

The temptation is huge to hurry up with this last part of my taper.  It's been 3 years and five months!  I know it would be a bad thing, though, since I have enough low days with my current tapering to know that it could only be worse.  And then there's the question of what will happen when I am finally off: Will WD hit with a vengeance anyway as has happened to some?  And so, one day at a time and try not to obsess on it!

 

SG

 

 

 

 

Started ADs back around 1995 after bad break-up, starting with Prozac.  Switched to Wellbutrin, and then to Effexor in 2002
Effexor XR 2002-2014 up to 225 mg at one point, down to 37.5 mg towards end but back up to 75 mg in 2014; now realize I had W/D as I dropped down, memory very poor about history.  Extreme emotions, poor concentration as I stepped back down, didn't connect the dots!
Summer 2014 reduced to 0 very quickly, was sick of anhedonia/sexual dysfunction due to meds, depression never controlled if not worse. Didn't recognize WD since symptoms built slowly (thought I had ADD! and menopausal on top of it), starting with severe sweats, very bad cog-fog and memory issues, culminating in weight loss, severe anxiety and depression, panic, severe apathy and insomnia by eight months off.  Saw p-doc who put me on Remeron, increased from 7.5 mg/day to 37.5 mg by May 22, 2015; still doing very badly though able to sleep.

June 1. 2015 Reinstated Effexor XR 37.5 mg, Remeron dropped to 30 mg PM. Immediate relief of symptoms, like nothing had ever happened!  Joined SA and began on advice of friend who recognized it was WD all along! Began tapering in July 2015.

Been tapering both meds ever since, focusing on one more than the other or doing no more than 5% of each per month.

12 mg Effexor and 5.8 mg Remeron (mirtazapine SolTabs to make a solution with OraPlus) as of 5/4/2017 

Update 3/14/18: 2.9 mg Remeron and 6 mg Effexor; 6/10/18:  2.6 mg Remeron and 4.9 mg Effexor

 

My intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9313-squirrellygirl-effexor-withdrawal-etc/page-2#entry196679

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

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8 hours ago, SquirrellyGirl said:

my memory is so bad, I'd forget to do what the therapist told me to do.  One simple task:  write down three good things a day.  I can't even remember to do that.

 

I suggest you set a reminder on your phone.

 

8 hours ago, SquirrellyGirl said:

The temptation is huge to hurry up with this last part of my taper.  It's been 3 years and five months!

 

I know exactly how you feel.  I've been a mod for nearly 3 years, tapering for 3 y 2 m and seen members jump off too soon and end up with issues.  Recently I was thinking about jumping off from 5mg, and that was just after I had just paid for $75 dollars worth of compounded capsules.  It's like on our good days we think we don't need the drug, but have to remember that it's not us that needs it it our brain.

* NO LONGER ACTIVE on SA *

MISSION ACCOMPLISHED:  (6 year taper)      0mg Pristiq  on 13th November 2021

ADs since ~1992:  25+ years - 1 unknown, Prozac (muscle weakness), Zoloft; citalopram (pooped out) CTed (very sick for 2.5 wks a few months after); Pristiq:  50mg 2012, 100mg beg 2013 (Serotonin Toxicity)  Tapering from Oct 2015 - 13 Nov 2021   LAST DOSE 0.0025mg

Post 0 updates start here    My tapering program     My Intro (goes to tapering graph)

 VIDEO:   Antidepressant Withdrawal Syndrome and its Management

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Hi SquirrellyGirl, 

 

How have you been doing?💚

Been on APs, benzos, ADs and opiates, for chronic pain. Had Akathisia in the past that made me suicidal. Still on Seroquel. 2019:➡️ March10=7.25mg ✔️ April17=7.0✔️ June5=6.75✔️ July14=6.50✔️ Aug28=6.25✔️ Oct10=6.20  ✔️ Oct21=6.0✔️ Dec16=5.80 ✔️ 2020➡️ Jan 21=5.60 ✔️ April2=5.40 ✔️ May29=5.20 ✔️ Aug14= 5.0 ✔️Sep29=4.80✔️2021➡️ Jan31=4.60 mg✔️ April24=4.40mg✔️Jul17=4.30mg ✔️ Aug 28=4.20 ✔️ Oct 11=4.15✔️Nov1=4.10 ✔️ Nov21= 4.05✔️ Dec13= 4mg ✔️2022 ➡️ Jan8=3.95✔️ Jan31=3.90✔️ March2=3.85 ✔️ April4=3.80 ✔️ June16=3.75✔️ July26=3.70✔️ Sep2=3.65✔️ Oct21=3.60 ✔️ Dec8=3.55✔️2023➡️ Jan 26=3.50✔️ March 17=3.45✔️ June12=3.40✔️ July30=3.35✔️ Sep14=3.30✔️ Oct31=3.25✔️This is NOT medical advice.Consult your doctor.

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Hello, 

I'm embarrassed that I haven't been here in a long time, so didn't even see Carnie's post asking how I was doing!

 

Well, there's been a lot going on in my life.  My husband was laid off in March and remains unemployed.  Being 58 makes it much harder to get hired.  Five years ago, when I was in protracted withdrawal, he was at risk of a lay-off and the wheels came off my bus completely.  I was terrified.  I have to say that, although I have had moments of fear and distress about what will become of us if he doesn't find a job soon, I am handling it all a lot better than I would have five years ago!  

 

I am now on a minuscule bead of Effexor, can't even weigh it. It's probably 1/3 to 1/4 the size of the average size bead, so I figure I'm on something like 0.3 mg.  After the next two weeks of these tiny beads, I'm jumping off.  I am also down to 0.85 mg mirtazapine (Remeron).  Recently, I've been waking at 4 am again.  I've had bouts where I'd wake early like that and roll around for awhile and then manage to fall back asleep.  Last night was a little harder to get back to sleep, though.  Had to get up and drink some milk, and even then it took awhile to get back down. It could be worse.  I still remember the days of waking and ruminating about scary stuff.  Grateful it isn't that way.

 

I spent this spring pursuing some medical testing to see where I'm at.  Urine amino acid testing showed that my serotonin is slightly low but still "normal," whereas epinephrine/norepinephrine were higher.   Perhaps the job situation.  I have suffered from lack of motivation and energy for so long, I wanted to see where I was at with neurotransmitters and their metabolites, especially since I am homozygous for snps in the Mao-A and COMT genes, which code for enzymes that process neurotransmitters.  I have the slow version of those enzymes which theoretically mean I have HIGHER THAN AVERAGE neurotransmitter levels!  Gee, and there I was taking SSRI/SNRIs that elevate those NTs even further!  I figure this is why I went into low-grade serotonin syndrome back when I was in withdrawal and taking both SamE and 5-htp!   I know that urine levels do not necessarily reflect what's happening in the brain.  However, I read an article that discussed social anxiety being associated with high serotonin, and this makes sense for me from childhood.  I always thought my "diagnosis" was depression, but I now realize that social anxiety was my primary issue with depression being secondary as I judged myself and felt "less than" and inferior to others, and isolated because I was so shy.

 

I also found out that my hormones are totally messed up.  My estrogen and progesterone were through the roof, even though I am menopausal, and my testosterone is through the floor, even for a menopausal woman!  I've had sexual side effects from the drugs for the entire time I've taken them, over 20 years but even worse these days.  My muscle mass has really fallen off in the last year and my skin is sagging, and I think this is due to the low T problem.  I am supplementing DHEA hoping to up the T.  DHEA levels were also low.  Something is causing my testosterone to convert to estrogen excessively, so my RN has me taking DIM which is supposed to block the conversion of T to E.

 

I also found out I have elevated H1C and a very high level of an antibody associated with type 1 diabetes!  There has been no diabetes in my family! I do have some SNPs that are associated with higher incidence of diabetes, but no family members diagnosed with it, so I am thinking the mirtazapine has pushed my genetic tendency to become nearly my destiny!  I thought by this low a dose of mirtazapine that the negative effects would diminish, but maybe not?  I know mirtazapine has been associated with diabetes.  I forgot to mention, I'm at the lowest weight I've been at since high school, about 122 lb, so nowhere near the body size for type 2 diabetes.  My cholesterol is also freakishly high, about 280, though my HDL is still high enough to make my ratio ok.  Still, I was hoping the numbers would get better the lower I got on the meds, but so far not the case, only getting worse!

 

I hadn't been working much throughout the withdrawal process, though I have been building my dog herding business.  It was getting better but then the summer heat killed business back a bit.  I am enjoying it more when doing it.  Herding was my main hobby for many years, but for the last few years I hadn't been enjoying it and felt working my dogs was one more chore.  Now I am feeling a bit more interested in it, and I have fun with my students because I enjoy them and it is the only social contact I really get!  But now, with our financial situation, I am feeling that I may need to go out and get a real job with benefits, and it scares me.  The social phobia is part of the problem, still there after all these years.  Also, I do'n't want to give up the small business I have because the money is good for the few hours worked.  Business is picking up a bit.  But still, there's no benefits!  Not having worked for many years, I feel my employability is reduced with so little work history.  And what am I really qualified to do?  I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up LOL! I am a bit afraid of the stress of a "real" job accountable to an employer, worried that the stress will trigger withdrawal.  Am I strong enough to take this on?  It's one thing to take training students on here at my home, but commuting 45 minutes each way for a full-time job is a scary proposition!  For some reason I am interested in trying to work at a Costco, because I feel I could do that kind of work, and they are a good company to work for.  No guarantee they'd want me!

 

So, again, given the scary situation we find ourselves in financially, I could be a lot worse off emotionally.   I will add that there were times in recent months that I was so low and self-hating, I doubted whether being off the meds was the right thing to do.  Clearly I wasn't coping well.  But knowing what I now know about the drugs, they aren't the answer, and they aren't FIXING anything.  

 

I guess that's it for now.  I'm soldiering on.

 

SG

 

 

Started ADs back around 1995 after bad break-up, starting with Prozac.  Switched to Wellbutrin, and then to Effexor in 2002
Effexor XR 2002-2014 up to 225 mg at one point, down to 37.5 mg towards end but back up to 75 mg in 2014; now realize I had W/D as I dropped down, memory very poor about history.  Extreme emotions, poor concentration as I stepped back down, didn't connect the dots!
Summer 2014 reduced to 0 very quickly, was sick of anhedonia/sexual dysfunction due to meds, depression never controlled if not worse. Didn't recognize WD since symptoms built slowly (thought I had ADD! and menopausal on top of it), starting with severe sweats, very bad cog-fog and memory issues, culminating in weight loss, severe anxiety and depression, panic, severe apathy and insomnia by eight months off.  Saw p-doc who put me on Remeron, increased from 7.5 mg/day to 37.5 mg by May 22, 2015; still doing very badly though able to sleep.

June 1. 2015 Reinstated Effexor XR 37.5 mg, Remeron dropped to 30 mg PM. Immediate relief of symptoms, like nothing had ever happened!  Joined SA and began on advice of friend who recognized it was WD all along! Began tapering in July 2015.

Been tapering both meds ever since, focusing on one more than the other or doing no more than 5% of each per month.

12 mg Effexor and 5.8 mg Remeron (mirtazapine SolTabs to make a solution with OraPlus) as of 5/4/2017 

Update 3/14/18: 2.9 mg Remeron and 6 mg Effexor; 6/10/18:  2.6 mg Remeron and 4.9 mg Effexor

 

My intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9313-squirrellygirl-effexor-withdrawal-etc/page-2#entry196679

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

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  • 4 weeks later...
  • Moderator Emeritus

Ok, I'm back.  I have jumped off my tiny bead of Effexor!  That was about 10 days ago and so far so good.  I am still anxious and depressed about our financial situation with my husband remaining unemployed and the prospect of a new job requiring us to make big changes in our lives with a likely relocation and all that entails, but given all of that I feel my emotions are justified and not dictated by withdrawal.  In fact, I KNOW I would have been emotionally in a much worse state had this happened two years ago while tapering.  When I was in protracted WD five years ago my husband survived a round of layoffs and I was in a tailspin at the prospect.  So, things could be worse.

 

I am on 0.8 mg Remeron.   While in the last stage of my Effexor taper I ground the Remeron taper down to a crawl,   So, I will now resume that taper.

 

I co-tapered more aggressively than advised, at times, but backed off as needed and never came off the rails.  I let how I was feeling be my guide.  Has it all been smooth sailing?  No, I had some times where the anhedonia got really bad and motivation was really low.  Motivation is still an issue but I have been feeling more emotions.  I have some shows I love to stream that have brought me to tears with joy as well as sadness.  I have felt gratitude and excitement to see my herding students do well.  I am appreciating the place we live, with the space for my animals and the opportunity to do my herding business here, and I get very sad at the idea of losing it all.  LIfe has kind of sucked for us the past six months, yet there have still been those moments.

 

I don't know what comes next.  I am just hoping that as one of the ones to do a mostly proper taper I will reap the benefits by not experiencing protracted withdrawal again.

 

Cheers!

SG

Started ADs back around 1995 after bad break-up, starting with Prozac.  Switched to Wellbutrin, and then to Effexor in 2002
Effexor XR 2002-2014 up to 225 mg at one point, down to 37.5 mg towards end but back up to 75 mg in 2014; now realize I had W/D as I dropped down, memory very poor about history.  Extreme emotions, poor concentration as I stepped back down, didn't connect the dots!
Summer 2014 reduced to 0 very quickly, was sick of anhedonia/sexual dysfunction due to meds, depression never controlled if not worse. Didn't recognize WD since symptoms built slowly (thought I had ADD! and menopausal on top of it), starting with severe sweats, very bad cog-fog and memory issues, culminating in weight loss, severe anxiety and depression, panic, severe apathy and insomnia by eight months off.  Saw p-doc who put me on Remeron, increased from 7.5 mg/day to 37.5 mg by May 22, 2015; still doing very badly though able to sleep.

June 1. 2015 Reinstated Effexor XR 37.5 mg, Remeron dropped to 30 mg PM. Immediate relief of symptoms, like nothing had ever happened!  Joined SA and began on advice of friend who recognized it was WD all along! Began tapering in July 2015.

Been tapering both meds ever since, focusing on one more than the other or doing no more than 5% of each per month.

12 mg Effexor and 5.8 mg Remeron (mirtazapine SolTabs to make a solution with OraPlus) as of 5/4/2017 

Update 3/14/18: 2.9 mg Remeron and 6 mg Effexor; 6/10/18:  2.6 mg Remeron and 4.9 mg Effexor

 

My intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9313-squirrellygirl-effexor-withdrawal-etc/page-2#entry196679

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

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  • Moderator Emeritus
25 minutes ago, SquirrellyGirl said:

I am on 0.8 mg Remeron.   While in the last stage of my Effexor taper I ground the Remeron taper down to a crawl,   So, I will now resume that taper.

 

Congratulations on completing your Effexor taper. You might want to wait 2-3 months to let things settle before resuming your Remeron taper.

Gridley Introduction

 

Lexapro 20 mg since 2004.  Begin Brassmonkey Slide Taper Jan. 2017.   

End 2017 year 1 of taper at 9.25mg 

End 2018 year 2 of taper at 4.1mg

End 2019 year 3 of taper at 1.0mg  

Oct. 30, 2020  Jump to zero from 0.025mg.  Current dose: 0.000mg

3 year, 10 month taper is 100% complete.

 

Ativan 1 mg to 1.875mg 1986-2020, two CT's and reinstatements

Nov. 2020, 7-week Ativan-Valium crossover to 18.75mg Valium

Feb. 2021, begin 10%/4 week taper of 18.75mg Valium 

End 2021  year 1 of Valium taper at 6mg

End 2022 year 2 of Valium taper at 2.75mg 

End 2023 year 3 of Valium taper at 1mg

Jan. 24, 2024: Hold at 1mg and shift to Imipramine taper.

Taper is 95% complete.

 

Imipramine 75 mg daily since 1986.  Jan.-Sept. 2016 tapered to 14.4mg  

March 22, 2022: Begin 10%/4 week taper

Aug. 5, 2022: hold at 9.5mg and shift to Valium taper

Jan. 24, 2024: Resume Imipramine taper.  Current dose as of Feb. 22: 7.6mg

Taper is 90% complete.  

  

Supplements: multiple, quercetin, omega-3, vitamins C, E and D3, magnesium glycinate, probiotics, zinc, melatonin .3mg, anti-candida, iron, serrapeptase, nattokinase


I am not a medical professional and this is not medical advice but simply information based on my own experience, as well as other members who have survived these drugs.

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Hi SG-- congratulations on making the jump to "0"  it's been a long time in coming.  I'm sorry to hear that your life is in such upheaval right now having  been in similar situations I know it can really play havoc on the nerves.  All the inner strength  you developed during your taper will be really helpful for getting through it.  Give yourself a chance to adjust and let things simmer down before pushing on with the remeron  taper.  I know it's just a little bit, but don't push things too hard.

 

Brass

20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013.

Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks.  The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better.

Final Dose 0.016mg.     Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017

 

"It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general."  Stephen Hawking

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  • 1 month later...

This is so inspiring, SG. It's hard to find anyone who's successfully come off of Effexor! I'm at about 3mg now, have been tapering for nearly 4.5 years and am pushing back against the urge to just stop taking it. I need to take it all the way until the end like you did. Keep updating us on how you're doing!

 

Side note, my new general doc asked me 'why are you still on this, what is 3mg of Effexor even doing for you now'. Lol, it's NOT doing anything for me.. I just need to do it this slowly to not feel insane withdrawal symptoms. She just stopped there :) I feel like docs will never know the impact this drug has!

History: Began suffering from panic attacks when my father passed away in 2005. Been on and off SSRIs (Celexa, Lexapro, Effexor XR), and therapy since then.

2009 - Started Effexor XR 75mg. Consistent therapy starting Oct 2013

Feb 2014 - Therapist and I felt I was ready to come off Effexor - went to half dose (37.5mg) for a week and then off completely by advice of psychiatrist - bad w/d for a week then gone

May 2014 - bad protracted w/d came out of nowhere.. constant dizziness, agoraphobia(never had before), intense headaches, fatigue for 3 months, all tests (brain MRI, inner ear tests, blood tests, etc.) normal. could not drive, grocery shop, or live life.

Aug 2014 - back on Effexor XR 75mg as neurologist thought these symptoms were my anxiety coming back, all w/d symptoms disappear within 2 weeks. I should have went back on at a lower dose, but I hadn't discovered this site yet. I finally did discover this site, and gave myself a year to stabilize.

July 2015 - Started tapering from 75mg. 5% cuts every 3 weeks. From July 2015 - March 2016, reduced to 37.5mg (half dose). In March 2017, down to 18.3mg (quarter dose). April 2020 - down to 0.38mg.

 

Now: Finally med free as of Oct 31, 2020 after 5.5 years of tapering. Still med and withdrawal free, January 2023. ☀️

Supplements during tapering and now: Meditation, daily exercise, fish oil, clean diet, working from home (more sleep!)

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  • 2 months later...

@SquirrellyGirl how have you been?  Also @primekittycat how are you? Any side effects from the medication?

Example:

2018 - Started Effexor 37.5 in Janurary of 2018
2019 January, 2nd  - Cold Turkeyed from Effexor for 3 days. Reinstated on the third day, then stabilized(It took 3 months to stabilize)

2019 June - I switched from Effexor instant release to Extended Release 37.5 for better tapering. I tapered to 50% in 4 weeks before reinstating my dosage back to 37.5(due to withdrawls). I waited 2 months to stabilize but never did at 37.5

2019 September - continued to taper in to 25% on extended release

2019 October - continued to taper to half of the beads(18.75mg)... WIthdrawls were so bad I tried switching back to the instant release at the same dosage(18.75mg)

2019 November 28th - Discontinued effexor at 18.75 without anymore tapering.

 

2020 January - Just can't sleep, have constipation, low libido and still lack of full emotion

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On 2/4/2020 at 10:51 AM, Rozon1 said:

@SquirrellyGirl how have you been?  Also @primekittycat how are you? Any side effects from the medication?

Doing well, thanks for asking. No withdrawal effects in a while thanks to the slow taper. I'm down to 2mg now. What about you?

History: Began suffering from panic attacks when my father passed away in 2005. Been on and off SSRIs (Celexa, Lexapro, Effexor XR), and therapy since then.

2009 - Started Effexor XR 75mg. Consistent therapy starting Oct 2013

Feb 2014 - Therapist and I felt I was ready to come off Effexor - went to half dose (37.5mg) for a week and then off completely by advice of psychiatrist - bad w/d for a week then gone

May 2014 - bad protracted w/d came out of nowhere.. constant dizziness, agoraphobia(never had before), intense headaches, fatigue for 3 months, all tests (brain MRI, inner ear tests, blood tests, etc.) normal. could not drive, grocery shop, or live life.

Aug 2014 - back on Effexor XR 75mg as neurologist thought these symptoms were my anxiety coming back, all w/d symptoms disappear within 2 weeks. I should have went back on at a lower dose, but I hadn't discovered this site yet. I finally did discover this site, and gave myself a year to stabilize.

July 2015 - Started tapering from 75mg. 5% cuts every 3 weeks. From July 2015 - March 2016, reduced to 37.5mg (half dose). In March 2017, down to 18.3mg (quarter dose). April 2020 - down to 0.38mg.

 

Now: Finally med free as of Oct 31, 2020 after 5.5 years of tapering. Still med and withdrawal free, January 2023. ☀️

Supplements during tapering and now: Meditation, daily exercise, fish oil, clean diet, working from home (more sleep!)

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@primekittycat I’m doing not that great but better for sure. I don’t think I can reinstate as I was having terrible side effects from effexor when I was last on it and I’m already 2 1/2 months out. I’m glad your on a low dosage. You’re almost done! 

Example:

2018 - Started Effexor 37.5 in Janurary of 2018
2019 January, 2nd  - Cold Turkeyed from Effexor for 3 days. Reinstated on the third day, then stabilized(It took 3 months to stabilize)

2019 June - I switched from Effexor instant release to Extended Release 37.5 for better tapering. I tapered to 50% in 4 weeks before reinstating my dosage back to 37.5(due to withdrawls). I waited 2 months to stabilize but never did at 37.5

2019 September - continued to taper in to 25% on extended release

2019 October - continued to taper to half of the beads(18.75mg)... WIthdrawls were so bad I tried switching back to the instant release at the same dosage(18.75mg)

2019 November 28th - Discontinued effexor at 18.75 without anymore tapering.

 

2020 January - Just can't sleep, have constipation, low libido and still lack of full emotion

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  • 1 month later...
  • Moderator Emeritus

We are living in crazy times!

 

Ok, I am now off mirtazapine.  It just sort of happened a couple of months ago.  I was down to 0.3 mg liquid and kept forgetting to take it at night.  My sleep had deteriorated and it was the same whether I took it or not, so I just decided to end it.  I sleep until 4:30-5 and then wake up, roll around, do some tapping, and then manage to fall back asleep. It could be worse.

 

We are in the midst of relocating to Oregon from CA.  My husband got hired up there and has been away working while I remain behind, trying to get our place packed up.  We're in escrow on a house up there, and fortunately a friend is buying our place as is, a huge relief since I was pretty freaked out about trying to get this place ready to be listed, with showings etc. when I've got four dogs here!  I'm not happy about moving.  Everyone says this could be big opportunity, see it as an adventure, but I'm not able to see it that way.  Maybe it's some version of withdrawal.  But, this is my home state and I am very ambivalent about leaving my friends and my little business that has been trying to grow despite me, because people are finally learning about what I offer with my herding dog training.  Of course, this coronavirus is starting to blow that all up.

 

I wake in the night ruminating about all of this, all that I have to do to pack up, how to navigate getting my animals moved up there, how is the virus going to impact doing all of this, and what's going to happen once I'm up there in the way of finding work, staying afloat in the aftermath of the virus - recession, etc.  It's not ideal to be coming off these meds during all of this, but it is what it is, and I am happy to say I am not experiencing any serious waves that I can identify, other than the emotional fallout of my life at the moment.

 

I am grateful to not have to put these chemicals in my body anymore, that is to be sure!!!

 

SG

Started ADs back around 1995 after bad break-up, starting with Prozac.  Switched to Wellbutrin, and then to Effexor in 2002
Effexor XR 2002-2014 up to 225 mg at one point, down to 37.5 mg towards end but back up to 75 mg in 2014; now realize I had W/D as I dropped down, memory very poor about history.  Extreme emotions, poor concentration as I stepped back down, didn't connect the dots!
Summer 2014 reduced to 0 very quickly, was sick of anhedonia/sexual dysfunction due to meds, depression never controlled if not worse. Didn't recognize WD since symptoms built slowly (thought I had ADD! and menopausal on top of it), starting with severe sweats, very bad cog-fog and memory issues, culminating in weight loss, severe anxiety and depression, panic, severe apathy and insomnia by eight months off.  Saw p-doc who put me on Remeron, increased from 7.5 mg/day to 37.5 mg by May 22, 2015; still doing very badly though able to sleep.

June 1. 2015 Reinstated Effexor XR 37.5 mg, Remeron dropped to 30 mg PM. Immediate relief of symptoms, like nothing had ever happened!  Joined SA and began on advice of friend who recognized it was WD all along! Began tapering in July 2015.

Been tapering both meds ever since, focusing on one more than the other or doing no more than 5% of each per month.

12 mg Effexor and 5.8 mg Remeron (mirtazapine SolTabs to make a solution with OraPlus) as of 5/4/2017 

Update 3/14/18: 2.9 mg Remeron and 6 mg Effexor; 6/10/18:  2.6 mg Remeron and 4.9 mg Effexor

 

My intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9313-squirrellygirl-effexor-withdrawal-etc/page-2#entry196679

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

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  • 2 months later...

Hello. I am in severe withdrawals from venlaxifin. I was on for over 10 years (bounced around 37.5, 75, 50, 25) and off 9 months now. I did a terrible haphazard taper from the Awful advice of my doc. WD didn’t hit me until 6 months later and now I am in HORRIFIC agony. The physical pain is absolutely off the charts. The phycological isn’t much better.  I didn’t realize it was WD until about 3 weeks ago. Can you tell me what your WD symptoms were and how you reinstated??

Please and thank you.

2020, April 17 to date: 100mg Gabapentine 3xdaily

2019, January to August Venlaxifine uneducated/hapharzard tapering, stopped middle of August

*Rough Dates below:

2018 Venlaxifine 25mg x2 a day

2014 - 2018 Venlaxfine back to 37.5mg

2010 - 2014 Venlaxfine upped 75mg

2008 - 2010, Venlaxifine 37.5mg

2002 to 2008 Zoloft, Welbutrin, Amitriptyline: no extact dates, started at one and moved to the next over time

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  • 2 months later...
  • Moderator Emeritus

I am sorry that I don't check in regularly anymore, and Dawnd, I hope you sought answers elsewhere than here!

Had I known when I reinstated 10 months after going off of Effexor that I could have probably gotten relief with a much smaller reinstatement dose, I would have done it.  I then wouldn't have had to spend the next five years tapering, though it took that long because I was tapering two meds and really didn't want to throw myself into horrid withdrawal again. 

 

To that end, I succeeded.  One year off Effexor and eight months off Remeron (mirtazapine). I can say that I have not had any major waves during and after  the very slow taper.  Has life been good?  Well, not so much, but not because of coming off the meds. I wrote about my husband's lay-off, and it was 11 months before he had a job out of state, requiring us to relocate 8 hours from where we were living.  He went ahead of me and I was on my own for three months trying to get our place sale-able.  Thankfully, a friend bought our place, but it was a traumatic period and move, and then depressing on the other end for having left all my friends and business behind, knowing no one here. With covid-19, I am unemployed here, lonely without friends, and facing a scary health situation.  Long story short, I am facing the reality that I will probably become dependent on insulin as a type I diabetic of late onset (LADA), an autoimmune disease.  I also have been in denial about a digestive tract problem, intermittent diarrhea and constipation with cramping, that I just kept ignoring for the last few years, but which may itself be another autoimmune disorder.  I am devastated that my health is deteriorating as I finally freed myself of the psych meds.  I am having a very difficult time facing the rest of my life injecting insulin.  I am not there yet, but if I truly do have this thing, that is the eventuality.  I am seeing a new doctor here and will be doing more testing to see where things are at, but I do know that I am pre-diabetic at this time, since I began testing with a glucose meter.  I am able to maintain normal levels, though, avoiding sugar/starch and eating plenty of good fats and protein.  Used to be the tapering and getting off the meds was the obsession of my life, and now it is this.   What I do know is that I am depressed and frightened, and I know that at some point health care providers will push for me to be medicated to deal with the depression.

 

I was really hoping that coming off the meds would be the beginning of a new, positive era in my life.

 

SG

 

 

Started ADs back around 1995 after bad break-up, starting with Prozac.  Switched to Wellbutrin, and then to Effexor in 2002
Effexor XR 2002-2014 up to 225 mg at one point, down to 37.5 mg towards end but back up to 75 mg in 2014; now realize I had W/D as I dropped down, memory very poor about history.  Extreme emotions, poor concentration as I stepped back down, didn't connect the dots!
Summer 2014 reduced to 0 very quickly, was sick of anhedonia/sexual dysfunction due to meds, depression never controlled if not worse. Didn't recognize WD since symptoms built slowly (thought I had ADD! and menopausal on top of it), starting with severe sweats, very bad cog-fog and memory issues, culminating in weight loss, severe anxiety and depression, panic, severe apathy and insomnia by eight months off.  Saw p-doc who put me on Remeron, increased from 7.5 mg/day to 37.5 mg by May 22, 2015; still doing very badly though able to sleep.

June 1. 2015 Reinstated Effexor XR 37.5 mg, Remeron dropped to 30 mg PM. Immediate relief of symptoms, like nothing had ever happened!  Joined SA and began on advice of friend who recognized it was WD all along! Began tapering in July 2015.

Been tapering both meds ever since, focusing on one more than the other or doing no more than 5% of each per month.

12 mg Effexor and 5.8 mg Remeron (mirtazapine SolTabs to make a solution with OraPlus) as of 5/4/2017 

Update 3/14/18: 2.9 mg Remeron and 6 mg Effexor; 6/10/18:  2.6 mg Remeron and 4.9 mg Effexor

 

My intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9313-squirrellygirl-effexor-withdrawal-etc/page-2#entry196679

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

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  • Moderator Emeritus
2 hours ago, SquirrellyGirl said:

I know that at some point health care providers will push for me to be medicated to deal with the depression.

 

I suggest that you find yourself a good, supportive counsellor to help you learn ways to cope with your health issues.  When we have big changes happen in our lives go through a period of grief.

* NO LONGER ACTIVE on SA *

MISSION ACCOMPLISHED:  (6 year taper)      0mg Pristiq  on 13th November 2021

ADs since ~1992:  25+ years - 1 unknown, Prozac (muscle weakness), Zoloft; citalopram (pooped out) CTed (very sick for 2.5 wks a few months after); Pristiq:  50mg 2012, 100mg beg 2013 (Serotonin Toxicity)  Tapering from Oct 2015 - 13 Nov 2021   LAST DOSE 0.0025mg

Post 0 updates start here    My tapering program     My Intro (goes to tapering graph)

 VIDEO:   Antidepressant Withdrawal Syndrome and its Management

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Dear SuirrellyGirl,  I'm so sorry you're having to face these health issues, especially in the isolation of the epidemic as well as a new, unfamiliar location.  My best you.

Arbor

 

Edited by ChessieCat
unbolded

Zoloft: 1995 - 2015

Prozac: 2015 - 2018 (tapered from 40mg x day on July 31 to 30mg on August 31 to 20mg on September 31 to 10mg October 31 to 0mg on  December 15, 2018

Gabapentin: 2016 to 2019  (tapered from 300mg x day to 150mg on August 31, 2019 to 75mg on September 15 to 50mg on September 31 to 25ishmg on October 15 to 0mg on December 1, 2019

Enalapril: 2010 - 2019

Lipitor: 2017 -2017

Metformin: 2000 - 2020

Liothyronine: 2007 - 2019

Levothyroxine: 2000 - 2022

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