Jump to content
JanCarol

Making Activist Art

Recommended Posts

JanCarol

On BlueBalu's thread, BTDT wrote:

 

 

There was a show on tv the other day about a scandal at the Red Cross in Canada where a lot of people got tainted blood and died some suffered and suffered but did not die they suffer still ... a lady wrote a play hoped to be a movie about it.. so far it is a play and it is doing amazingly people love it ... maybe we need a play or a movie about this ... then the world could see it.  She said she based the play on a family... I wonder how one would ever show wd in a play... but I am not actress or producer so I don't have to know but it sounds like a great vehicle for getting this known... oddly people who were damaged in the blood scandal have never had their story told till now they say it is healing to them to have a voice in the world. 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8302-bluebalu86-i-am-very-scared-and-need-help-please-help-me/page-8

 

OMG B!  I just started a play tonight!  I was inspired by attending a theatre festival this weekend, and so many of the plays addressed real issues, like relationships, inner demons, and feminism and taking control of your life. In one play, Florence Nightingale told her cohorts to "stop taking the pills, they are only meant to control you!"  (and she, Maggie Thatcher, and Jane Austen escaped the asylum!)

 

I thought I would start a play about withdrawal.  I've never written a play before, so I will need to get help from some experts, but I can visualize how it will be.  It would be best to condense it into a very potent 1-act play, and might be a way to get our voices heard in a broader audience.  I'm basing the characters on composites of people here - one depressed, one anxious (and abused), one "psychotic" (I call it Emergency), one chronic pain, and an Alto-like character (again, composite, of course).  It will show 5 years in these peoples' lives, and at the end, they will meet on the internet and start recovery.  It shows the drug rep and the doctor, and I've just written the part where everyone gets their first prescription.

 

The next scene, a year later, people will be manifesting side effects, and get additional prescriptions.  The scene after that will be 5 years, and the characters will be on multiple scripts with debilitating effects, but the pseudo-Alto character will have figured out withdrawal, and will be helping the others to take charge of their conditions. They will be talking on the internet - with some of them talking over coffee like we do here in Brisbane.

 

It would be nice if I could bring the emotion that a play like "Love Letters" brings, where the actors read their internet posts aloud, and their stories come alive for all the others listening.

 

The challenge is to make the characters real and engaging, to invoke the caring of the audience, and to present the material without being "preachy."  To raise awareness.  I have 2 playwright/directors in mind - one did a searing expose of self injury (one of her early works - confronting, not very successful - but it sure had us talking) - and the other has done plays about  "encounter groups" and "body dysmorphia / anorexia disorder issues at a lingerie sales party."  Both are activist-aware, and while they cannot write the play for me - I must write what I know - they can guide me to getting it published and up and running.  And hopefully, making it a good script.  And if I'm good enough, perhaps one will consent to cast and direct it for me!

 

Additionally, if it is a one-act, it will tour the "festival circuit," which means that potentially thousands of people could see the performances, where if it's a full-length play, it might never be seen, except maybe at one local theatre.  I know nothing about writing plays.  But I hope to have a rough draft ready in 2 weeks to show these ladies at the next festival.

 

Btdt - you are a prophet!
  


"Easy, easy - just go easy and you'll finish." - Hawaiian Kapuna

 

Holding is hard work, holding is a blessing. Give your brain time to heal before you try again.

 

My suggestions are not medical advice, you are in charge of your own medical choices.

 

A lifetime of being prescribed antidepressants that caused problems (30 years in total). At age 35 flipped to "bipolar," but was not diagnosed for 5 years. Started my journey in Midwest United States. Crossed the Pacific for love and hope; currently living in Australia.   CT Seroquel 25 mg some time in 2013.   Tapered Reboxetine 4 mg Oct 2013 to Sept 2014 = GONE (3 years on Reboxetine).     Tapered Lithium 900 to 475 MG (alternating with the SNRI) Jan 2014 - Nov 2014, tapered Lithium 475 mg Jan 2015 -  Feb 2016 = GONE (10 years  on Lithium).  Many mistakes in dry cutting dosages were made.


The tedious thread (my intro):  JanCarol ☼ Reboxetine first, then Lithium

The happy thread (my success story):  JanCarol - Undiagnosed  Off all bipolar drugs

My own blog:  https://shamanexplorations.com/shamans-blog/

 

 

I have been psych drug FREE since 1 Feb 2016!

Share this post


Link to post
peggy

Jan, that sounds like a fantastic idea! I LOVE it - i can see your lights up on broadway, you will do the speaking tours!


Started in 2000 - On 150mg most of the time, (but up to 225mg at highest dose for 6 months in the beginning)
Reduced off easily first time - but got depressed (not too much anxiety) 6 months later
Back on effexor for another 9 months.
Reduced off again with no immediate w/d - suddenly got depressed and anxious ++ again 3 or 4 months later.
Back on effexor - this time for 3 years
Reduced off over a month - 6 weeks later terrible anxiety - back on.
Rinse and repeat 4 more times - each time the period before the anxiety comes back got shorter and shorter
Jan - July 2012 75mg down to 37.5mg;, 8/3/12 - 35mg. 8/25/12 - 32mg. 9/11- 28mg, 10/2 - 25mg, 10/29 - 22mg, 11/19 - 19.8mg; 12/11 - 17m,
1/1- 15.5mg; 1/22 -14mg, 2/7 14.9mg, 2/18 - 17.8mg - crashed big time: back to 75mg where i sat for 2 years....

4th  March 2015 - 67.5mg;   31st March - 60mg;  24th April - 53mg; 13th May - 48mg; 26th May - 45mg;  9th June - 41mg; 1 July- 37.5mg; 20 July - 34mg; 11 August - 31mg; 1st Sept - 28mg;  1st Dec - 25.8mg;  28th Dec - 23.2mg; 23rd Jan-21.9mg; Feb 7th- 21mg; March 1st - 20.1mg, March 30th - 18mg

Share this post


Link to post
brassmonkey

Hi JanCarol-- this sounds like an interesting idea.  The main thing to remember when writing a play, as opposed to a movie or book, is that it is all about the dialogue and the verbal interplay of the characters.  The setting and movements of the people are of little consequence.  Settings should be described in basic terms on the scene notes just to tell where the scene is taking place and to specify any important props such as a chess board the actors need to be using.  The movement of the actors is almost entirely up to the director and actors to develop as they rehearse the play, so you don't need to think too much about them.  Unless there is some big important thing that really has to take place like a sword fight or something crashing through the window that the actors  react to with their dialogue, then it should be mentioned as a note where it happens.  Also each character is an individual and will use their words differently, as in you would say something in a little different manner than your brother would.  It is best to get the thought written down first then refine how it is being said.

 

Years and years of theatre experience distilled into one paragraph. Hope it helps.


20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013.

Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks.  The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better.

Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017

 

"It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general."  Stephen Hawking

Share this post


Link to post
LoveandLight

Very very inspiring :)


2000 - sertraline for job anxiety low confidence (17 years old) ..which turned the next 16 years into nightmare!

 

On/off sertraline severe withdrawals every time. 2014 - felt better as reduced dose of sertraline no more inner restlessness. Doctor rushed off again. Hit severe withdrawal. Lost the little I had in life. Couldn't get stable again on 12.5mg. Was switched to prozac. Had severe reaction to prozac..came off in November 2015 at 6mg as felt more confused and damaged on it..Even more withdrawal ..rage, depression, dyphoria, near constant suicidal ideation, self harm impulses, doom, concrete block in head, unable to do much of anything with this feeling in head..went back on 6mg of sertraline to see if would alleviate anything. It didn't..reduced from December to June 2016 came off at 2.5mg sertraline as was hospitalised for the severe rage, suicidal impulses, and put on 50mg lofepramine which in 2nd week reduced all symptoms but gave insomnia which still have..psych stopped lofepramine cold turkey..no increased withdrawal symptoms new symptoms from lofepramine except persistant insomnia which has as side effect.

 

Taking Ativan for 8 months for the severe rage self harm impulses 1-3 times a week (mostly 2 times a week) at .5mg. Two months (I'm unsure exactly when the interdose started to happen) ago interdose withdrawal seemed to happen..2 days I think after the Ativan.

 

 

Nightmare that could have been avoided!

Share this post


Link to post
JanCarol

Thanks Brass - I take that on board. Doubt there will be any sword fights - but not for lack of desire - it'd be great to have all 5 "consumers" attack the doc, for example!

 

It's a fantasy, an activist one - anything could happen, I suppose.

 

"workshopping" is a luxury I won't get with this, because even though I know a lot of theatre people, I am not one of them.  I'm "just the audience" most of the time.

 

Here's a question:  If a withdrawal doc is published and/or on the net - like Breggin, Gotschke,  and Healy - or even Whitaker - and are well known figures, can I use their names?  I don't exactly want to quote them directly, because that would be "preachy," and I have around 30 min to get my point across.  But I'm looking for the "breakthrough moment" where the lights come on for the characters about what is happening to them.  Can I talk about Whitaker, Breggin, Healy, Gotschke, Hall, Icarus - without permission?  (I'm sure most of them would be fine about permissions for a tiny play in the anitpodean end of the earth) but still......

 

It seems that plays talk about "famous people" all the time, sometimes twisting their words, in the name of art and "fair use."  This would be a little more direct than satire, without quoting, like, "Whitaker says the drugs make us worse!"  "Healy calls them EFFECTS, not side effects"  or "Breggin says, it's just life problems!"  They would have to be quick sound bytes because I don't want to preach.  I can, however, put my library of books on the stage to give weight to the discussion - that this is not just an internet phenomenon, that these are published authors, doctors, and the beginnings of a movement.

 

The Alto-like character will NOT be Alto, won't use her handle or name (heck, I don't know her name!), and will be a composite of Alto, GIaK, and the mods in SA.  So I feel safe about that.  The other characters will be absolutely unrecognizable, just "patterns" that I've seen with fictional details about their lives.  Goodness knows, I see the same patterns over and over in SA!

 

Thanks again Brass Monkey - dialogue.  In my first vision of it, the characters were pretty wooden on the stage, and they were just reciting their troubles.  That didn't sound like an interesting play.  It got better when I brought in the Doctor, a caring soul who just "wants what is best for them."  It's ambitious for a one-act, because it will have at least 6 players.  I thought about some having partners and that just gets out of hand.  I think I will reference partners and carers in the "internet posts."

 

Anyhow, thanks for the sparks and I will watch this space for any community input!


"Easy, easy - just go easy and you'll finish." - Hawaiian Kapuna

 

Holding is hard work, holding is a blessing. Give your brain time to heal before you try again.

 

My suggestions are not medical advice, you are in charge of your own medical choices.

 

A lifetime of being prescribed antidepressants that caused problems (30 years in total). At age 35 flipped to "bipolar," but was not diagnosed for 5 years. Started my journey in Midwest United States. Crossed the Pacific for love and hope; currently living in Australia.   CT Seroquel 25 mg some time in 2013.   Tapered Reboxetine 4 mg Oct 2013 to Sept 2014 = GONE (3 years on Reboxetine).     Tapered Lithium 900 to 475 MG (alternating with the SNRI) Jan 2014 - Nov 2014, tapered Lithium 475 mg Jan 2015 -  Feb 2016 = GONE (10 years  on Lithium).  Many mistakes in dry cutting dosages were made.


The tedious thread (my intro):  JanCarol ☼ Reboxetine first, then Lithium

The happy thread (my success story):  JanCarol - Undiagnosed  Off all bipolar drugs

My own blog:  https://shamanexplorations.com/shamans-blog/

 

 

I have been psych drug FREE since 1 Feb 2016!

Share this post


Link to post
JanCarol

Oooh spark!

 

I can also have different nationalities represented!  That will make it fun for the actors, who LOVE to do accents!

 

American - Brit - Aussie - and "European somewhere"  (less specific).  Maybe even throw in a Canadian to honor B's instigation of this idea!  That's subtle.  Aussies cannot tell the difference between Canadian and American - but - blessed be - we have at least 2 Canadian actors that I maybe could get access to!


"Easy, easy - just go easy and you'll finish." - Hawaiian Kapuna

 

Holding is hard work, holding is a blessing. Give your brain time to heal before you try again.

 

My suggestions are not medical advice, you are in charge of your own medical choices.

 

A lifetime of being prescribed antidepressants that caused problems (30 years in total). At age 35 flipped to "bipolar," but was not diagnosed for 5 years. Started my journey in Midwest United States. Crossed the Pacific for love and hope; currently living in Australia.   CT Seroquel 25 mg some time in 2013.   Tapered Reboxetine 4 mg Oct 2013 to Sept 2014 = GONE (3 years on Reboxetine).     Tapered Lithium 900 to 475 MG (alternating with the SNRI) Jan 2014 - Nov 2014, tapered Lithium 475 mg Jan 2015 -  Feb 2016 = GONE (10 years  on Lithium).  Many mistakes in dry cutting dosages were made.


The tedious thread (my intro):  JanCarol ☼ Reboxetine first, then Lithium

The happy thread (my success story):  JanCarol - Undiagnosed  Off all bipolar drugs

My own blog:  https://shamanexplorations.com/shamans-blog/

 

 

I have been psych drug FREE since 1 Feb 2016!

Share this post


Link to post
peggy

here's another idea;

 

i am not a theatre goer really - but we saw The Jersey Boys twice - I liked the way it was narrated by different characters - sort of setting the scene and then it is implemented.  

 

perhaps the alter alto could narrate the characters background - what led them to the doctor to get the drugs?

 

and it could be good if some of the characters could show a variety of responses to the drugs - maybe in the beginning it's great - they feel better, get back into life etc - but then slowly break down - insidiously and because the medical system is so fractured the doctors are not either recognising or even wondering about the link the between their symptoms and the drugs. I like to refer to it as 'paying the piper'  

 

the multi nationality of it can demonstrate that it is  a world wide phenomena.


Started in 2000 - On 150mg most of the time, (but up to 225mg at highest dose for 6 months in the beginning)
Reduced off easily first time - but got depressed (not too much anxiety) 6 months later
Back on effexor for another 9 months.
Reduced off again with no immediate w/d - suddenly got depressed and anxious ++ again 3 or 4 months later.
Back on effexor - this time for 3 years
Reduced off over a month - 6 weeks later terrible anxiety - back on.
Rinse and repeat 4 more times - each time the period before the anxiety comes back got shorter and shorter
Jan - July 2012 75mg down to 37.5mg;, 8/3/12 - 35mg. 8/25/12 - 32mg. 9/11- 28mg, 10/2 - 25mg, 10/29 - 22mg, 11/19 - 19.8mg; 12/11 - 17m,
1/1- 15.5mg; 1/22 -14mg, 2/7 14.9mg, 2/18 - 17.8mg - crashed big time: back to 75mg where i sat for 2 years....

4th  March 2015 - 67.5mg;   31st March - 60mg;  24th April - 53mg; 13th May - 48mg; 26th May - 45mg;  9th June - 41mg; 1 July- 37.5mg; 20 July - 34mg; 11 August - 31mg; 1st Sept - 28mg;  1st Dec - 25.8mg;  28th Dec - 23.2mg; 23rd Jan-21.9mg; Feb 7th- 21mg; March 1st - 20.1mg, March 30th - 18mg

Share this post


Link to post
JanCarol

Okay Peggy - I don't do musicals, but now I have to see Jersey Boys.  Is the film anything like the Real Thing (you cosmopolitan world traveller, you!)?

 

I like it that AlterAlto - I've called her "Tigergrrrl" - can be the "wise mind" that unveils the story.  The all-seeing narrator.  That may just be brilliant!  (except I also want to show that she suffered, too!)


"Easy, easy - just go easy and you'll finish." - Hawaiian Kapuna

 

Holding is hard work, holding is a blessing. Give your brain time to heal before you try again.

 

My suggestions are not medical advice, you are in charge of your own medical choices.

 

A lifetime of being prescribed antidepressants that caused problems (30 years in total). At age 35 flipped to "bipolar," but was not diagnosed for 5 years. Started my journey in Midwest United States. Crossed the Pacific for love and hope; currently living in Australia.   CT Seroquel 25 mg some time in 2013.   Tapered Reboxetine 4 mg Oct 2013 to Sept 2014 = GONE (3 years on Reboxetine).     Tapered Lithium 900 to 475 MG (alternating with the SNRI) Jan 2014 - Nov 2014, tapered Lithium 475 mg Jan 2015 -  Feb 2016 = GONE (10 years  on Lithium).  Many mistakes in dry cutting dosages were made.


The tedious thread (my intro):  JanCarol ☼ Reboxetine first, then Lithium

The happy thread (my success story):  JanCarol - Undiagnosed  Off all bipolar drugs

My own blog:  https://shamanexplorations.com/shamans-blog/

 

 

I have been psych drug FREE since 1 Feb 2016!

Share this post


Link to post
dalsaan

you could flip it and start with them all meeting on the internet, finding their way, taking steps to recovery etc and then the play is the story of how they got there,  the actors could tell their own story of that journey but the narrator puts that into context explaining the epidemic, the vested interests, the silences, the complicity, the ignorance, the arrogance and the exercises of power that kept us subject to drugs that enslaved us and shredded our wellbeing. 


Please note - I am not a medical practitioner and I do not give medical advice. I offer an opinion based on my own experiences, reading and discussion with others.On Effexor for 2 months at the start of 2005. Had extreme insomnia as an adverse reaction. Changed to mirtazapine. Have been trying to get off since mid 2008 with numerous failures including CTs and slow (but not slow enough tapers)Have slow tapered at 10 per cent or less for years. I have liquid mirtazapine made at a compounding chemist.

Was on 1.6 ml as at 19 March 2014.

Dropped to 1.5 ml 7 June 2014. Dropped to 1.4 in about September.

Dropped to 1.3 on 20 December 2014. Dropped to 1.2 in mid Jan 2015.

Dropped to 1 ml in late Feb 2015. I think my old medication had run out of puff so I tried 1ml when I got the new stuff and it seems to be going ok. Sleep has been good over the last week (as of 13/3/15).

Dropped to 1/2 ml 14/11/15 Fatigue still there as are memory and cognition problems. Sleep is patchy but liveable compared to what it has been in the past.

 

DRUG FREE - as at 1st May 2017

 

>My intro post is here - http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/2250-dalsaan

Share this post


Link to post
Carmen

I love your idea. Bring your play to Kansas City! 


April 2014:  Klonopin  1mg for panic attacks (That was too much so I cut them in half)

August 2014: 10mg Paxil, .5mg Klonopin ( I have always been very conservative with this. I only take it once or twice a week. Sometimes I don't take it for several weeks.)

September 2014: 20mg Paxil, .5mg Klonopin as needed

October 2014: 25mg Paxil, Klonopin .5mg as needed

November 2014: Fast taper from Paxil. Full-blown withdrawals.

December 2014: 10mg Lexapro, 600mg Gabapentin, 15mg Remeron, Klonopin .5mg as needed.

January 2015: 10mg Lexapro, 900mg Gabapentin, 15mg Remeron, Klonopin .5mg as needed

February 2015: Switched from Lexapro back to Paxil 10mg, 1200mg Gabapentin, 15mg Buspar, 7.5mg Remeron, .5 Klonopin as needed

March and April 2015: Paxil 10mg, 1200mg Gabapentin, 30mg Buspar, 7.5mg Remeron

 May 2015: Started Paxil taper in quarter increments. Increased Buspar to 30mg. Everything else is the same.

June 2015: Tapering Paxil. Right now I'm at 5mg. Increased Buspar to 45 mg. Everything else is the same. 

Share this post


Link to post
GardeniaBlossom

This is a fantastic idea. I love it.


After being on (over 25) psychiatric meds continuously during a 16 year period, I began in July 2014 to taper off 1mg Klonopin. In September 2014, I came off Brintellix, Trazadone, Zoloft, Proprityline & Hydroxyzine in 2 weeks on my own without knowledge on how to taper properly. I've been off all psych "meds" since 10/2014 and am currently experiencing protracted withdrawal.

 

Medication history: Vibryd, Wellbutrin, Lithium, Prozac, Xanax, Celexa, Cymbalta, Trileptal, Lamictal, Abilify, Zoloft, Trazadone, Citalopram, Effexor, Seroquel, Klonopin, Paxil, Brintellix, Protriptyline, Lexapro, Pristiq, Buspar, Clonidine, Lorazepam, Notriptyline, Hydroxyzine, Serzone.

 

Introduction: http://bit.ly/1SIxWwl.

Share this post


Link to post
brassmonkey

When referencing public figures in a "documentary" context it is very important to have your facts right and documented. (You don't have to state the documentation in the usage, just have it in your files)  If you paraphrase what they have said it is very important not to alter the meaning of their original statement by the way you change the wording.  To reference them in passing should not require permission or cause any trouble, but when in doubt get a release.

 

It's also not too good an idea to publically talk about who you are basing characters on.  It is great to keep the information in your personal notes for the project so you can draw on it as needed.   Many people end up being quite upset when they find that a character has been based on them because the character is usually end up being nothing like they see themselves.  There may be some trait or quirk that you throw in to make the character to fit your play that the person you base it on doesn't possess, yet because the character is based on them, others will think that the trait or quirk is really theirs.  It can lead to a lot of hurt feelings, missunderstandings, and possible legal actions that aren't worth the trouble.

 

There are several writers "workshops" on facebook that may be of help with feedback.  Be careful as they can be either nurturing or very brutal to beginners.


20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013.

Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks.  The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better.

Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017

 

"It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general."  Stephen Hawking

Share this post


Link to post
JanCarol

Thanks Brass.  When I say "based on" I'm not talking about anything personal.  Like Alto - is a central shining light of research that has helped all of us, who never had a "mental illness."  And symptoms - that SO MANY of us have had.  I'm probably in each of the characters, myself, to be realistic.  Because most of these characters are on the web, I don't know identifying features.  It's strange to watch the characters take on a life of their own - starting from a template - but now they are telling me what to do.  (I think this is a good sign!).  They're starting to get all dramatic on me!  Oh my! (I am so undramatic I am boring)

 

As for "famous published people," let's see if I understand:  If I say, "Peter Breggin says" blah blah, I need to quote exactly/directly or get permission.  (finding short enough quotes is the problem).  The advantage of getting permission is, if I use David Healy, or Robert Whitaker, and the play gets published - it could (as Peggy so eagerly suggested) get a wider audience than this country town.

 

I will not go to any online workshop that my directors/playwrights don't recommend.  And I'm not connected or competent enough to open up my own workshop (like my brother does for his writing).


"Easy, easy - just go easy and you'll finish." - Hawaiian Kapuna

 

Holding is hard work, holding is a blessing. Give your brain time to heal before you try again.

 

My suggestions are not medical advice, you are in charge of your own medical choices.

 

A lifetime of being prescribed antidepressants that caused problems (30 years in total). At age 35 flipped to "bipolar," but was not diagnosed for 5 years. Started my journey in Midwest United States. Crossed the Pacific for love and hope; currently living in Australia.   CT Seroquel 25 mg some time in 2013.   Tapered Reboxetine 4 mg Oct 2013 to Sept 2014 = GONE (3 years on Reboxetine).     Tapered Lithium 900 to 475 MG (alternating with the SNRI) Jan 2014 - Nov 2014, tapered Lithium 475 mg Jan 2015 -  Feb 2016 = GONE (10 years  on Lithium).  Many mistakes in dry cutting dosages were made.


The tedious thread (my intro):  JanCarol ☼ Reboxetine first, then Lithium

The happy thread (my success story):  JanCarol - Undiagnosed  Off all bipolar drugs

My own blog:  https://shamanexplorations.com/shamans-blog/

 

 

I have been psych drug FREE since 1 Feb 2016!

Share this post


Link to post
btdt

On BlueBalu's thread, BTDT wrote:

 

 

There was a show on tv the other day about a scandal at the Red Cross in Canada where a lot of people got tainted blood and died some suffered and suffered but did not die they suffer still ... a lady wrote a play hoped to be a movie about it.. so far it is a play and it is doing amazingly people love it ... maybe we need a play or a movie about this ... then the world could see it.  She said she based the play on a family... I wonder how one would ever show wd in a play... but I am not actress or producer so I don't have to know but it sounds like a great vehicle for getting this known... oddly people who were damaged in the blood scandal have never had their story told till now they say it is healing to them to have a voice in the world. 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8302-bluebalu86-i-am-very-scared-and-need-help-please-help-me/page-8

 

OMG B!  I just started a play tonight!  I was inspired by attending a theatre festival this weekend, and so many of the plays addressed real issues, like relationships, inner demons, and feminism and taking control of your life. In one play, Florence Nightingale told her cohorts to "stop taking the pills, they are only meant to control you!"  (and she, Maggie Thatcher, and Jane Austen escaped the asylum!)

 

I thought I would start a play about withdrawal.  I've never written a play before, so I will need to get help from some experts, but I can visualize how it will be.  It would be best to condense it into a very potent 1-act play, and might be a way to get our voices heard in a broader audience.  I'm basing the characters on composites of people here - one depressed, one anxious (and abused), one "psychotic" (I call it Emergency), one chronic pain, and an Alto-like character (again, composite, of course).  It will show 5 years in these peoples' lives, and at the end, they will meet on the internet and start recovery.  It shows the drug rep and the doctor, and I've just written the part where everyone gets their first prescription.

 

The next scene, a year later, people will be manifesting side effects, and get additional prescriptions.  The scene after that will be 5 years, and the characters will be on multiple scripts with debilitating effects, but the pseudo-Alto character will have figured out withdrawal, and will be helping the others to take charge of their conditions. They will be talking on the internet - with some of them talking over coffee like we do here in Brisbane.

 

It would be nice if I could bring the emotion that a play like "Love Letters" brings, where the actors read their internet posts aloud, and their stories come alive for all the others listening.

 

The challenge is to make the characters real and engaging, to invoke the caring of the audience, and to present the material without being "preachy."  To raise awareness.  I have 2 playwright/directors in mind - one did a searing expose of self injury (one of her early works - confronting, not very successful - but it sure had us talking) - and the other has done plays about  "encounter groups" and "body dysmorphia / anorexia disorder issues at a lingerie sales party."  Both are activist-aware, and while they cannot write the play for me - I must write what I know - they can guide me to getting it published and up and running.  And hopefully, making it a good script.  And if I'm good enough, perhaps one will consent to cast and direct it for me!

 

Additionally, if it is a one-act, it will tour the "festival circuit," which means that potentially thousands of people could see the performances, where if it's a full-length play, it might never be seen, except maybe at one local theatre.  I know nothing about writing plays.  But I hope to have a rough draft ready in 2 weeks to show these ladies at the next festival.

 

Btdt - you are a prophet!

  

How did I miss seeing this?  WHAT FUN! 

 

I had a play going on in my head while reading your post :) the people I have talked to over the years all how I see them in my mind.. jumping up saying me... me no me over hear we want drama we want empathy we want impact... 

Withdrawal has all of that in spade that is for sure. 

 

Glenmullen I think may have been the first book writer I should check that to be sure and his name as been suggested to do more.. I can't recall what more. ya brain still the brain...he is not the most well known

 

When the people are all getting the first scripts are there any SAR.... something to think about.. for me a SAR was no caught so other things were looked for.. more drugs given. 

 

Collaboration or not.. do you want ideas... do you want tragedy... some of what we have had can't always be handled well by people in wd... but some don't have any choice either.

 

As for dialogue that is what we do here every day ... day in day out .. talk talk talk...

 

If you have read something that moved you over the years did you put it up for the best of SA... if you did maybe some things will be found there... I did not know "best of SA" existed for the longest time so can't say I have used it.  We can also vote on a thread by clicking on the stars at the top of the page to vote the page up I never think of it ... but just voted this one up... maybe some things from that... 

 

I hope if this flies that you video tape it so we can all see it.. and thanks for putting in a Canadian.. :) I like that. 

peace and happy writing :)


WARNING THIS WILL BE LONG
Had a car accident in 85
Codeine was the pain med when I was release from hosp continuous use till 89
Given PROZAC by a specialist to help with nerve pain in my leg 89-90 not sure which year
Was not told a thing about it being a psych med thought it was a pain killer no info about psych side effects I went nuts had hallucinations. As I had a head injury and was diagnosed with a concussion in 85 I was sent to a head injury clinic in 1990 five years after the accident. I don't think they knew I had been on prozac I did not think it a big deal and never did finish the bottle of pills. I had tests of course lots of them. Was put into a pain clinic and given amitriptyline which stopped the withdrawal but had many side effects. But I could sleep something I had not done in a very long time the pain lessened. My mother got cancer in 94 they switched my meds to Zoloft to help deal with this pressure as I was her main care giver she died in 96. I stopped zoloft in 96 had withdrawal was put on paxil went nutty quit it ct put on resperidol quit it ct had withdrawal was put on Effexor... 2years later celexa was added 20mg then increased to 40mg huge personality change went wild. Did too fast taper off Celexa 05 as I felt unwell for a long time prior... quit Effexor 150mg ct 07 found ****** 8 months into withdrawal learned some things was banned from there in 08 have kept learning since. there is really not enough room here to put my history but I have a lot of opinions about a lot of things especially any of the drugs mentioned above.
One thing I would like to add here is this tidbit ALL OPIATES INCREASE SEROTONIN it is not a huge jump to being in chronic pain to being put on an ssri/snri and opiates will affect your antidepressants and your thinking.

As I do not update much I will put my quit date Nov. 17 2007 I quit Effexor cold turkey. 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1096-introducing-myself-btdt/

There is a crack in everything ..That's how the light gets in :)

Share this post


Link to post
btdt

Okay Peggy - I don't do musicals, but now I have to see Jersey Boys.  Is the film anything like the Real Thing (you cosmopolitan world traveller, you!)?

 

I like it that AlterAlto - I've called her "Tigergrrrl" - can be the "wise mind" that unveils the story.  The all-seeing narrator.  That may just be brilliant!  (except I also want to show that she suffered, too!)

I think we talked about Alto in the Katy Perry song Roar in the music thread :) grrrrarrrrr


WARNING THIS WILL BE LONG
Had a car accident in 85
Codeine was the pain med when I was release from hosp continuous use till 89
Given PROZAC by a specialist to help with nerve pain in my leg 89-90 not sure which year
Was not told a thing about it being a psych med thought it was a pain killer no info about psych side effects I went nuts had hallucinations. As I had a head injury and was diagnosed with a concussion in 85 I was sent to a head injury clinic in 1990 five years after the accident. I don't think they knew I had been on prozac I did not think it a big deal and never did finish the bottle of pills. I had tests of course lots of them. Was put into a pain clinic and given amitriptyline which stopped the withdrawal but had many side effects. But I could sleep something I had not done in a very long time the pain lessened. My mother got cancer in 94 they switched my meds to Zoloft to help deal with this pressure as I was her main care giver she died in 96. I stopped zoloft in 96 had withdrawal was put on paxil went nutty quit it ct put on resperidol quit it ct had withdrawal was put on Effexor... 2years later celexa was added 20mg then increased to 40mg huge personality change went wild. Did too fast taper off Celexa 05 as I felt unwell for a long time prior... quit Effexor 150mg ct 07 found ****** 8 months into withdrawal learned some things was banned from there in 08 have kept learning since. there is really not enough room here to put my history but I have a lot of opinions about a lot of things especially any of the drugs mentioned above.
One thing I would like to add here is this tidbit ALL OPIATES INCREASE SEROTONIN it is not a huge jump to being in chronic pain to being put on an ssri/snri and opiates will affect your antidepressants and your thinking.

As I do not update much I will put my quit date Nov. 17 2007 I quit Effexor cold turkey. 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1096-introducing-myself-btdt/

There is a crack in everything ..That's how the light gets in :)

Share this post


Link to post
JanCarol

You got it B!

I've got 5 patients, a drug rep, and a Doc. 

The 5 patients are:

Tigergrrl - menopause  ROARR!!!!  (I have no idea at this point if this character is anything like Alto - other than she helps others, and she started with a script for menopause)

Bliss - fibromyalgia / chronic fatigue

Downtime - depression

Emergencee - recurring psychosis

Anxietee - self explanatory, only she has an intrusive, abusive spouse as well.

 

What is SAR?

 

SO - here is the exciting part - I pitched it!  I pitched it to the BEST director and playwright!  Clever, gifted - good at humour, witty, wry, good at addressing issues in a way that people can relate to.

 

SHE WAS EXCITED!

 

She said "I'm a lazy playwright - I don't like to do too much research"  I said, "I'm not very creative, but I have a thousand case studies in my head, I know how this works."  

 

THEN she said, she just started a script of mirtazapine due to a recent divorce.  Her plan is to stay on it a month (hopefully she will get this information in time to come off of it smoothly)

 

She saw the dramatic potential.  She liked that it was edgy, almost unheard of.  I told her my goal was not to preach or teach, but to engage people in the drama and hopefully at the end, they will say, "I had no idea it could be like that."  or even if they say, "No, it's not like that!" they might think about it.

 

She was very positive.  I'm going to give her a disc and hard copy tomorrow!  She was my FIRST CHOICE for playwright/director because she's so talented

 

I just had another fantasy:  we perform the play, we FILM it, and because I'M the playwright (or one of them) - we could spread it around!  OMG the potential.  I'm excited!  It's nearly 3 am and I'm too excited to sleep!

 

They are all going to be different - in order to keep tension - some of them have to LIKE the drugs for awhile, or be SO AFRAID of withdrawing from them that they stay on them.  

I'm thinking I'm going to indulge some of our revenge fantasies at the end!  :-)


"Easy, easy - just go easy and you'll finish." - Hawaiian Kapuna

 

Holding is hard work, holding is a blessing. Give your brain time to heal before you try again.

 

My suggestions are not medical advice, you are in charge of your own medical choices.

 

A lifetime of being prescribed antidepressants that caused problems (30 years in total). At age 35 flipped to "bipolar," but was not diagnosed for 5 years. Started my journey in Midwest United States. Crossed the Pacific for love and hope; currently living in Australia.   CT Seroquel 25 mg some time in 2013.   Tapered Reboxetine 4 mg Oct 2013 to Sept 2014 = GONE (3 years on Reboxetine).     Tapered Lithium 900 to 475 MG (alternating with the SNRI) Jan 2014 - Nov 2014, tapered Lithium 475 mg Jan 2015 -  Feb 2016 = GONE (10 years  on Lithium).  Many mistakes in dry cutting dosages were made.


The tedious thread (my intro):  JanCarol ☼ Reboxetine first, then Lithium

The happy thread (my success story):  JanCarol - Undiagnosed  Off all bipolar drugs

My own blog:  https://shamanexplorations.com/shamans-blog/

 

 

I have been psych drug FREE since 1 Feb 2016!

Share this post


Link to post
peggy

that is so cool!

 

well done! You will be doing the talk show circuit - the potential reach is enormous!


Started in 2000 - On 150mg most of the time, (but up to 225mg at highest dose for 6 months in the beginning)
Reduced off easily first time - but got depressed (not too much anxiety) 6 months later
Back on effexor for another 9 months.
Reduced off again with no immediate w/d - suddenly got depressed and anxious ++ again 3 or 4 months later.
Back on effexor - this time for 3 years
Reduced off over a month - 6 weeks later terrible anxiety - back on.
Rinse and repeat 4 more times - each time the period before the anxiety comes back got shorter and shorter
Jan - July 2012 75mg down to 37.5mg;, 8/3/12 - 35mg. 8/25/12 - 32mg. 9/11- 28mg, 10/2 - 25mg, 10/29 - 22mg, 11/19 - 19.8mg; 12/11 - 17m,
1/1- 15.5mg; 1/22 -14mg, 2/7 14.9mg, 2/18 - 17.8mg - crashed big time: back to 75mg where i sat for 2 years....

4th  March 2015 - 67.5mg;   31st March - 60mg;  24th April - 53mg; 13th May - 48mg; 26th May - 45mg;  9th June - 41mg; 1 July- 37.5mg; 20 July - 34mg; 11 August - 31mg; 1st Sept - 28mg;  1st Dec - 25.8mg;  28th Dec - 23.2mg; 23rd Jan-21.9mg; Feb 7th- 21mg; March 1st - 20.1mg, March 30th - 18mg

Share this post


Link to post
InvisibleUnless

i just wanted to voice my support for this.  it sounds potentially invaluable, and you arent some bs-artist looking to cash in on the experience of others that you could never understand or actually live.

 

 

to avoid being preachy, i hope maybe you let the situations and characters experiences speak for themselves...awful pseudo-monologues like in south park destroy the fun and meaning for me...theres usually no reason to take the exchanges beyond the concrete, human interactions we normally have.

 

i feel this is simultaneously more contained but, in ways, more ambitious as a single-act project.  there will have to be a lot of allusion and tacit understandings, and its hard to have the right measure of explicitness when bringing together the whole picture.  im interested in how it comes together, and hope to read it once youve started putting out drafts.

 

im not wanting it to sound like im making creative suggestions with all of these comments, as i feel its not at all my place.  just felt like voicing a few opinions that shouldnt impact your direction/perspective, like that id be a bit disappointed if everyone had healed up (or was on their way) by the end of the program; it would almost seem self-defeating to me if there wasnt at least one character still in limbo.  and that the 'revenge fantasy' sequences you mention sound like amazing fun, so i hope something like that gets into the final work...those, and i suppose other aspects as well, remind me some of the film 'happiness'.  maybe a bit more transgressive a touch than what youre going for, but i have no real idea your genre boundaries so perhaps im way off.

 

 

so, above all, this sounds exciting, and i really wish you the best with it, personally and expressively.


from 2005-2012, i spent 7 years taking 17 different psychotropic medications covering several classes.  i would be taking 3-7 medications at a time, and 6 out of the 17 medications listed below were maxed or overmaxed in clinical dosage before i moved on to trying the next unhelpful cocktail.
 
antidepressants (SSRIs, SNRIs, NDRIs, tetracyclics): zoloft, wellbutrin, effexor, lexapro, prozac, cymbalta, remeron
antipsychotics (atypical): abilify, zyprexa, risperdal, geodon
sleep aids (benzos, off-label antidepressants & antipsychotics, hypnotics): seroquel, temazepam, trazodone, ambien
anxiolytics: buspar
anticonvulsants: topamax
 
i tapered off all psychotropics from late 2011 through early 2013, one by one.  since quitting, ive been cycling through severe, disabling withdrawal symptoms spanning the gamut of the serious, less serious, and rather worrisome side effects of these assorted medications.  previous cross-tapering and medication or dosage changes had also caused undiagnosed withdrawal symptoms.
 
brainpan addlepation

Share this post


Link to post
JanCarol

BS artist and cash?  On a one-act?  LOL!  I'm not even sure I want to be credited with anything more than "consultant!"  I'm happy to let the truly creative mind take this material and run with it!

 

If she is considerate enough to ask me:  "does this or that happen?" with side effects, or "how often does this happen?" or "What is it like when this happens?"  "what does this symptom look like, physically?" - I will be chuffed!

 

The advantage to her is that she's a stellar director, my first choice to direct - and the as playwright / director - she can draw the line to how much goes in the published script and how much gets to HER production of it.  The advantage to her is, if it is done in my "home theatre," they have a beautiful filming facility - WE CAN PUT IT UP ON YOUTUBE with the PLAYWRIGHT'S permission (that would be me, and she!)  THERE's a widespread audience.  But it will be long, probably the full 45 minutes for a one-act.

 

I give her my "script" (more of a recitation, really - the Southpark thing I'm trying to avoid) and notes today.


"Easy, easy - just go easy and you'll finish." - Hawaiian Kapuna

 

Holding is hard work, holding is a blessing. Give your brain time to heal before you try again.

 

My suggestions are not medical advice, you are in charge of your own medical choices.

 

A lifetime of being prescribed antidepressants that caused problems (30 years in total). At age 35 flipped to "bipolar," but was not diagnosed for 5 years. Started my journey in Midwest United States. Crossed the Pacific for love and hope; currently living in Australia.   CT Seroquel 25 mg some time in 2013.   Tapered Reboxetine 4 mg Oct 2013 to Sept 2014 = GONE (3 years on Reboxetine).     Tapered Lithium 900 to 475 MG (alternating with the SNRI) Jan 2014 - Nov 2014, tapered Lithium 475 mg Jan 2015 -  Feb 2016 = GONE (10 years  on Lithium).  Many mistakes in dry cutting dosages were made.


The tedious thread (my intro):  JanCarol ☼ Reboxetine first, then Lithium

The happy thread (my success story):  JanCarol - Undiagnosed  Off all bipolar drugs

My own blog:  https://shamanexplorations.com/shamans-blog/

 

 

I have been psych drug FREE since 1 Feb 2016!

Share this post


Link to post
westcoast

Any news?


2009: Cancer hospital said I had adjustment disorder because I thought they were doing it wrong. Their headshrinker prescribed Effexor, and my life set on a new course. I didn't know what was ahead, like a passenger on Disneyland's Matterhorn, smiling and waving as it climbs...clink, clink, clink.

2010: Post surgical accidental Effexor discontinuation by nurses, masked by intravenous Dilaudid. (The car is balanced at the top of the track.) I get home, pop a Vicodin, and ...

Whooosh...down, down, down, down, down...goes the trajectory of my life, up goes my mood and tendency to think everything is a good idea.
2012: After the bipolar jig was up, now a walking bag of unrelated symptoms, I went crazy on Daytrana (the Ritalin skin patch by Noven), because ADHD was a perfect fit for a bag of unrelated symptoms. I was prescribed Effexor for the nervousness of it, and things got neurological. An EEG showed enough activity to warrant an epilepsy diagnosis rather than non-epileptic ("psychogenic") seizures.

:o 2013-2014: Quit everything and got worse. I probably went through DAWS: dopamine agonist withdrawal syndrome. I drank to not feel, but I felt a lot: dread, fear, regret, grief: an utter sense of total loss of everything worth breathing about, for almost two years.

I was not suicidal but I wanted to be dead, at least dead to the experience of my own brain and body.

2015: I  began to recover after adding virgin coconut oil and organic grass-fed fed butter to a cup of instant coffee in the morning.

I did it hoping for mental acuity and better memory. After ten days of that, I was much better, mood-wise. Approximately neutral.

And, I experienced drowsiness. I could sleep. Not exactly happy, I did 30 days on Wellbutrin, because it had done me no harm in the past. 

I don't have the DAWS mood or state of mind. It never feel like doing anything if it means standing up.

In fact, I don't especially like moving. I'm a brain with a beanbag body.   :unsure:

Share this post


Link to post
JanCarol

I've sent her 3 bunches of notes, I'm getting ready to mail her a movie (SIde Effects, with Jude Law - different topic, but still relevant:  all the "dialogues" are there.)

 

If I want a one-act, I have to trim the patients down to 3.

 

Tigergrrl:  Menopause/Chronic Fatigue

Bliss:  Depression / Anxiety / Trauma

Emergencee:  Trauma / Psychotic events.

 

This changes the statistics.  I was hoping to have the statistics be more real to reflect the view that:  some people do get help.  It's not all hel.  OR - because there is a time element too, there will be 2 who get helped AT FIRST, but start to feel the drug price over time.

 

She has a job (I think she may be a teacher - I hope so, I'd like to think of her as my teacher!), she is on the festival circuit competing her very charming, witty play.  It looks like she is doing it commercially, too:  it's called "Hot Date," and this link might go bad, sorry it's the best I could find from this tiny market:  http://www.eventfinda.com.au/2015/dinner-theatre/brisbane  Witty, Aussie, well written, incredibly clever.  Apparently, the lead actress in Hot Date is also interested in the project (she'd make a great Tigergrrl - or Bliss - or even Drug Rep, except that's too small a role for her).

 

This is a months long thing, I think.  I'm going to send her this movie, then ask to meet with her so I can help her visualize staging for people on the internet.  She thinks it will be static and boring with people sitting in chairs (which we do) - but if you show the IMAGINATION of the internet, people can be hugging and surrounding someone in distress, holding them, helping them settle, breathing together - and still be on the internet.  She's probably never been in "chat rooms" or "forums" and doesn't know HOW REAL this place is for us.

 

By taking this focus, our main audience will be the under 30's.  But if we're clever, we can draw above that, too.

 

Thanks for the ask, it's good for me to write ideas down now and then, light a fire under my nose.  (because if it were under my bum I still wouldn't be able to think!)

 

Question for others:  I would like to show her 5 pages on SA.  I don't want to overwhelm her.  I'd like to show her people are supporting and praying for one another.  I'd like to show her withdrawal symptoms of various types.  When I think about pages (and I keep reading them all the time, part of my deal here), I haven't seen any that stand out - maybe another option would be to save excellent posts or exchanges, and show her how it works?

 

Anyhow, suggestions always gladly accepted.  After all, this thing is OURS, not mine.


"Easy, easy - just go easy and you'll finish." - Hawaiian Kapuna

 

Holding is hard work, holding is a blessing. Give your brain time to heal before you try again.

 

My suggestions are not medical advice, you are in charge of your own medical choices.

 

A lifetime of being prescribed antidepressants that caused problems (30 years in total). At age 35 flipped to "bipolar," but was not diagnosed for 5 years. Started my journey in Midwest United States. Crossed the Pacific for love and hope; currently living in Australia.   CT Seroquel 25 mg some time in 2013.   Tapered Reboxetine 4 mg Oct 2013 to Sept 2014 = GONE (3 years on Reboxetine).     Tapered Lithium 900 to 475 MG (alternating with the SNRI) Jan 2014 - Nov 2014, tapered Lithium 475 mg Jan 2015 -  Feb 2016 = GONE (10 years  on Lithium).  Many mistakes in dry cutting dosages were made.


The tedious thread (my intro):  JanCarol ☼ Reboxetine first, then Lithium

The happy thread (my success story):  JanCarol - Undiagnosed  Off all bipolar drugs

My own blog:  https://shamanexplorations.com/shamans-blog/

 

 

I have been psych drug FREE since 1 Feb 2016!

Share this post


Link to post
JanCarol

Here is my playwright acting in an ad (I guess just to show she is real).  She's the one who is actually ACTING.  The other person is supposed to be a celebrity but I'm not up on my Aussie celebrities to know if this is true.  It's a lot of screentime for my friend, though!   If you think her acting is good (I do!) then please like it!

 


"Easy, easy - just go easy and you'll finish." - Hawaiian Kapuna

 

Holding is hard work, holding is a blessing. Give your brain time to heal before you try again.

 

My suggestions are not medical advice, you are in charge of your own medical choices.

 

A lifetime of being prescribed antidepressants that caused problems (30 years in total). At age 35 flipped to "bipolar," but was not diagnosed for 5 years. Started my journey in Midwest United States. Crossed the Pacific for love and hope; currently living in Australia.   CT Seroquel 25 mg some time in 2013.   Tapered Reboxetine 4 mg Oct 2013 to Sept 2014 = GONE (3 years on Reboxetine).     Tapered Lithium 900 to 475 MG (alternating with the SNRI) Jan 2014 - Nov 2014, tapered Lithium 475 mg Jan 2015 -  Feb 2016 = GONE (10 years  on Lithium).  Many mistakes in dry cutting dosages were made.


The tedious thread (my intro):  JanCarol ☼ Reboxetine first, then Lithium

The happy thread (my success story):  JanCarol - Undiagnosed  Off all bipolar drugs

My own blog:  https://shamanexplorations.com/shamans-blog/

 

 

I have been psych drug FREE since 1 Feb 2016!

Share this post


Link to post
manymoretodays

Update's on this project? Love it!


Started with psycho meds circa 1988 I think 27 or 28 total.

AD's, antpsychotics, antiseizure mood stabilizers. Lithium, lamictal ,benzos, and stimulants. Some med. for narcolepsy once(Provigil,) Gabapentin........probably more.  Ask me?......I probably was on it.  Haphazard W/D's by Dr. recommend or uneducated self.

10/2014- off Lexapro--had been on highest dose 10 mg. then 5 mg. for a couple of years, went from 5 mg. to 3 mg. liquid and then CT in hospital(voluntary).  I got out of the hospital on a combination of low dose adderal salts x1/day and trileptal 150mg. x2/day.

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!

 

3/21/2016---I did some unwise updosing of trileptal/oxcarbazepine with some stressful stuff......doubled the above dose x2 during this last wave but began liquifying again and on approximately 68mg. starting today.  11/12//2016 24 mg. oxcarbazepine  12/9/2016 off oxcarbazepine/trileptal!!!! :) optimistic  2016 December 9- completely off all medications!!!!!

Omega3's,EPA +DHA= 1800 mg/day. Magnesium complex, orally, diluted in a liter of H2O(that I can shake up.....it usually dissolves more completely as the water gets down to room temperature) and/or Epsom salt baths prn.   Vit. C, D3, and E.  B12, melatonin tapered to 1mg., and bioidentical hormones sublingually.  Trace mineral drops.  L-lysine.  L-methylfolate=400 mcg plus daily spinach. Totally ready for a good long window to hit soon and getting better strings of full days and partial days along the way.  Definite improvement overall since I first arrived on the SA survivor ship.  Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider. manymoretodays

 

Share this post


Link to post
JanCarol

Well, I was overseas for a month, I left her with a bunch of material.  We had gotten as far as revamping the opening scene, with a rough draft of it, and a rough outline of the play.  We were supposed to meet yesterday, but she got "made redundant" (that's Aussie for "laid off") and cancelled our meeting.  I'm concerned that she's not as interested as she says she is.

 

THERE IS ANOTHER playwright in town who would be good for this project:  http://www.excaliburtheatre.com/  He knows me by face, and we have exchanged DVD's in the past (he sometimes asks me about "authenticity in American")  He is FAMOUS (locally) for his edgy plays, tight productions, and driving edge confronting material.  In competition, he usually sweeps in all categories (best script, best direction, best acting, best play, etc.)

 

His last play (ssh! don't tell him I said this) was lacking content.  It was created in response to people saying, "Not so much swearing, blood, goth and gore, please." and while it was a tight production, well acted and directed, it kept putting me to sleep with its philosophical meanderings.

 

My first playwright even mentioned getting him involved, as he is more of a dramatic playwright, while she is more of a comedy playwright.  Though he can write comedy too - and in order to succeed, this play will need moments of light laughter to balance the other parts.

 

NORMALLY, he likes to create his own content - but - IF I could get him interested, he would be an excellent choice.

 

My playwright left it at:  "I'll be in touch."  But I reckon if I haven't heard from her by the new year, I will proclaim she doesn't seem all that interested, and try and move on.
 
If I could get Mark Lucas (Excaliber Theatre Productions) - he will have capacity to film, as well as a strong pool of actors to draw upon.  (anyone here would give their eye-teeth to be in an Excaliber production).  Again, it's a specialized market - he only does one-act plays for competition - but ALL of his winning plays are published.  So he is a "published playwright."
 
Now to think about how to pitch it to him.  And he lives across town (may as well be across the world) so "jam sessions" would not be as convenient.  Now, if only my notes weren't all over the place!
 
I'm even willing to let the psychiatrist "win" in the end (as in the movie "Side Effects") if it gets my point across (so much for the "dead psychiatrist fantasy").  More and more, the dangers of these drugs are hitting mainstream Aussie media - the dangers of antidepressants were mentioned on last night's science show, earlier this month, there was a big write up in the Sydney Morning Herald which included the views of Peter Gotzsche, and there is an active lawsuit filed in Queensland that I posted an article one.  So it's not an invisible issue - not nearly as invisible as it is in the USA - but - it's still resisted, mostly by people who say, "but it saves lives," "it helped me", "they work," and "chemical imbalance" crap.  Even though GPs are now resisting prescribing, and will only do so with intense patient pressure - and sometimes not even then.
 
So there's the update, thanks for asking!
 

"Easy, easy - just go easy and you'll finish." - Hawaiian Kapuna

 

Holding is hard work, holding is a blessing. Give your brain time to heal before you try again.

 

My suggestions are not medical advice, you are in charge of your own medical choices.

 

A lifetime of being prescribed antidepressants that caused problems (30 years in total). At age 35 flipped to "bipolar," but was not diagnosed for 5 years. Started my journey in Midwest United States. Crossed the Pacific for love and hope; currently living in Australia.   CT Seroquel 25 mg some time in 2013.   Tapered Reboxetine 4 mg Oct 2013 to Sept 2014 = GONE (3 years on Reboxetine).     Tapered Lithium 900 to 475 MG (alternating with the SNRI) Jan 2014 - Nov 2014, tapered Lithium 475 mg Jan 2015 -  Feb 2016 = GONE (10 years  on Lithium).  Many mistakes in dry cutting dosages were made.


The tedious thread (my intro):  JanCarol ☼ Reboxetine first, then Lithium

The happy thread (my success story):  JanCarol - Undiagnosed  Off all bipolar drugs

My own blog:  https://shamanexplorations.com/shamans-blog/

 

 

I have been psych drug FREE since 1 Feb 2016!

Share this post


Link to post
JanCarol

To see the edginess of Excaliber / Mark Lucas' work, see this:

 

He never gives his script away, because he is published.  But I would want to film it, get it out there - and maybe raise him to international status by "publishing" the film on CEPUK, Mad In America, etc.


"Easy, easy - just go easy and you'll finish." - Hawaiian Kapuna

 

Holding is hard work, holding is a blessing. Give your brain time to heal before you try again.

 

My suggestions are not medical advice, you are in charge of your own medical choices.

 

A lifetime of being prescribed antidepressants that caused problems (30 years in total). At age 35 flipped to "bipolar," but was not diagnosed for 5 years. Started my journey in Midwest United States. Crossed the Pacific for love and hope; currently living in Australia.   CT Seroquel 25 mg some time in 2013.   Tapered Reboxetine 4 mg Oct 2013 to Sept 2014 = GONE (3 years on Reboxetine).     Tapered Lithium 900 to 475 MG (alternating with the SNRI) Jan 2014 - Nov 2014, tapered Lithium 475 mg Jan 2015 -  Feb 2016 = GONE (10 years  on Lithium).  Many mistakes in dry cutting dosages were made.


The tedious thread (my intro):  JanCarol ☼ Reboxetine first, then Lithium

The happy thread (my success story):  JanCarol - Undiagnosed  Off all bipolar drugs

My own blog:  https://shamanexplorations.com/shamans-blog/

 

 

I have been psych drug FREE since 1 Feb 2016!

Share this post


Link to post
dalsaan

Hi JC,

 

it would be great if you could get your chosen people involved.

 

I'm curious about your statement that GPs are now resisting prescribing - what's the evidence for that?   I dont see any down turn in prescription rates here or an anti-prescribing discourse

 

Dalsaan


Please note - I am not a medical practitioner and I do not give medical advice. I offer an opinion based on my own experiences, reading and discussion with others.On Effexor for 2 months at the start of 2005. Had extreme insomnia as an adverse reaction. Changed to mirtazapine. Have been trying to get off since mid 2008 with numerous failures including CTs and slow (but not slow enough tapers)Have slow tapered at 10 per cent or less for years. I have liquid mirtazapine made at a compounding chemist.

Was on 1.6 ml as at 19 March 2014.

Dropped to 1.5 ml 7 June 2014. Dropped to 1.4 in about September.

Dropped to 1.3 on 20 December 2014. Dropped to 1.2 in mid Jan 2015.

Dropped to 1 ml in late Feb 2015. I think my old medication had run out of puff so I tried 1ml when I got the new stuff and it seems to be going ok. Sleep has been good over the last week (as of 13/3/15).

Dropped to 1/2 ml 14/11/15 Fatigue still there as are memory and cognition problems. Sleep is patchy but liveable compared to what it has been in the past.

 

DRUG FREE - as at 1st May 2017

 

>My intro post is here - http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/2250-dalsaan

Share this post


Link to post
JanCarol

Evidence?  Anecdotal.

 

I've had friends - post abandonment / divorce / job change / stress - go to their GPs.

 

First response from GP:  we don't give those out anymore.

Second response - careful, cautious prescribing.  (like 15 mg mirtazapine for insomnia)

 

I've had 2-3 different friends get this response - they were surprised when I said, "GOOD!" to response #1, because they said "oh, what a hassle, I have to complain for 8 weeks / 2 visits or more in order to get a script." and, "I'm not going back to that GP again."  (i.e., the patient pressure is still there)

 

NOW - I don't know if they went to a "regular GP" or a bulk billing superclinic "doc in a box" thing.  I can imagine the latter provider would have more reticence than a regular GP.

 

I'm not saying it's a trend, I'm just seeing it in a few cases.  And I think its an indicator that GPs might be listening.  Some of them anway!

 

Also consider - I'm a Yank in Aussie land.  I find that Aussie docs prescribe less in general than what I am accustomed to.


"Easy, easy - just go easy and you'll finish." - Hawaiian Kapuna

 

Holding is hard work, holding is a blessing. Give your brain time to heal before you try again.

 

My suggestions are not medical advice, you are in charge of your own medical choices.

 

A lifetime of being prescribed antidepressants that caused problems (30 years in total). At age 35 flipped to "bipolar," but was not diagnosed for 5 years. Started my journey in Midwest United States. Crossed the Pacific for love and hope; currently living in Australia.   CT Seroquel 25 mg some time in 2013.   Tapered Reboxetine 4 mg Oct 2013 to Sept 2014 = GONE (3 years on Reboxetine).     Tapered Lithium 900 to 475 MG (alternating with the SNRI) Jan 2014 - Nov 2014, tapered Lithium 475 mg Jan 2015 -  Feb 2016 = GONE (10 years  on Lithium).  Many mistakes in dry cutting dosages were made.


The tedious thread (my intro):  JanCarol ☼ Reboxetine first, then Lithium

The happy thread (my success story):  JanCarol - Undiagnosed  Off all bipolar drugs

My own blog:  https://shamanexplorations.com/shamans-blog/

 

 

I have been psych drug FREE since 1 Feb 2016!

Share this post


Link to post
dalsaan

I'm wondering if there might be a movement in brissie. Would be good to know if there had been some action on prescribing


Please note - I am not a medical practitioner and I do not give medical advice. I offer an opinion based on my own experiences, reading and discussion with others.On Effexor for 2 months at the start of 2005. Had extreme insomnia as an adverse reaction. Changed to mirtazapine. Have been trying to get off since mid 2008 with numerous failures including CTs and slow (but not slow enough tapers)Have slow tapered at 10 per cent or less for years. I have liquid mirtazapine made at a compounding chemist.

Was on 1.6 ml as at 19 March 2014.

Dropped to 1.5 ml 7 June 2014. Dropped to 1.4 in about September.

Dropped to 1.3 on 20 December 2014. Dropped to 1.2 in mid Jan 2015.

Dropped to 1 ml in late Feb 2015. I think my old medication had run out of puff so I tried 1ml when I got the new stuff and it seems to be going ok. Sleep has been good over the last week (as of 13/3/15).

Dropped to 1/2 ml 14/11/15 Fatigue still there as are memory and cognition problems. Sleep is patchy but liveable compared to what it has been in the past.

 

DRUG FREE - as at 1st May 2017

 

>My intro post is here - http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/2250-dalsaan

Share this post


Link to post
manymoretodays

Very good.  The short film.

 

As well as the belief for the cause.  It's happening........the growing awareness.........the change for the better! 


Started with psycho meds circa 1988 I think 27 or 28 total.

AD's, antpsychotics, antiseizure mood stabilizers. Lithium, lamictal ,benzos, and stimulants. Some med. for narcolepsy once(Provigil,) Gabapentin........probably more.  Ask me?......I probably was on it.  Haphazard W/D's by Dr. recommend or uneducated self.

10/2014- off Lexapro--had been on highest dose 10 mg. then 5 mg. for a couple of years, went from 5 mg. to 3 mg. liquid and then CT in hospital(voluntary).  I got out of the hospital on a combination of low dose adderal salts x1/day and trileptal 150mg. x2/day.

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!

 

3/21/2016---I did some unwise updosing of trileptal/oxcarbazepine with some stressful stuff......doubled the above dose x2 during this last wave but began liquifying again and on approximately 68mg. starting today.  11/12//2016 24 mg. oxcarbazepine  12/9/2016 off oxcarbazepine/trileptal!!!! :) optimistic  2016 December 9- completely off all medications!!!!!

Omega3's,EPA +DHA= 1800 mg/day. Magnesium complex, orally, diluted in a liter of H2O(that I can shake up.....it usually dissolves more completely as the water gets down to room temperature) and/or Epsom salt baths prn.   Vit. C, D3, and E.  B12, melatonin tapered to 1mg., and bioidentical hormones sublingually.  Trace mineral drops.  L-lysine.  L-methylfolate=400 mcg plus daily spinach. Totally ready for a good long window to hit soon and getting better strings of full days and partial days along the way.  Definite improvement overall since I first arrived on the SA survivor ship.  Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider. manymoretodays

 

Share this post


Link to post
JanCarol

Yay!  SHE CALLED ME!  The playwright called me!  I've been on the backburner, and I thought she was losing interest, but she's actively pursuing me for this.

 

We have a tentative date next month (it was gonna be next week, but I had a conflict)...


"Easy, easy - just go easy and you'll finish." - Hawaiian Kapuna

 

Holding is hard work, holding is a blessing. Give your brain time to heal before you try again.

 

My suggestions are not medical advice, you are in charge of your own medical choices.

 

A lifetime of being prescribed antidepressants that caused problems (30 years in total). At age 35 flipped to "bipolar," but was not diagnosed for 5 years. Started my journey in Midwest United States. Crossed the Pacific for love and hope; currently living in Australia.   CT Seroquel 25 mg some time in 2013.   Tapered Reboxetine 4 mg Oct 2013 to Sept 2014 = GONE (3 years on Reboxetine).     Tapered Lithium 900 to 475 MG (alternating with the SNRI) Jan 2014 - Nov 2014, tapered Lithium 475 mg Jan 2015 -  Feb 2016 = GONE (10 years  on Lithium).  Many mistakes in dry cutting dosages were made.


The tedious thread (my intro):  JanCarol ☼ Reboxetine first, then Lithium

The happy thread (my success story):  JanCarol - Undiagnosed  Off all bipolar drugs

My own blog:  https://shamanexplorations.com/shamans-blog/

 

 

I have been psych drug FREE since 1 Feb 2016!

Share this post


Link to post
LinLina

I just stumbled across this topic. JanCarol, what happened to that play you wrote?


Lorazepam: took a daily dose of 1,5 mg for 2-3 months in Summer 2014 because of PTSD, adverse reaction to antibiotics, heavy muscle pain and a surgery. Tapered 4 months, which was a bit fast and very difficult, but I made it and recovered within a few weeks after the final dose. Benzo-free since February 2015.

Mirtazapine: Was put on 30 mg for "easing the Benzo-withdrawal" from November 2014 - March 2015. Bad mistake, getting off Mirtazapine seems to be even more difficult for me. Started a slow taper in April 2015.
[...] 25.10.2015 - 11.3 mg, 3.12.2015 - 8.4 mg, 5.12.2015 - 9.4 mg, 25.12.2015 - 9 mg, 27.12.2015 - 8.4 mg, 22.1.2016 - 7.5 mg
, 1.3.2016 - 6.9 mg, 15.3.2016 - 6.3 mg, 28.3.2016 - 5.9
mg [..moving on in small steps about 10 % per month....]  22.6.: 1.01 mg, 27.7.2017: 0.9 mg, 16.8.2017: 0.75 mg, 9.9.2017: 0.65 mg, 3.10.2017: 0.55 mg, 31.10.2017: 0.45 mg, 29.11.2017: 0.35 mg, 27.12.2017: 0.25 mg

 

My intro

Share this post


Link to post
bubbles
Quote

Also consider - I'm a Yank in Aussie land.  I find that Aussie docs prescribe less in general than what I am accustomed to.

This is an old thread, but this line caught my eye. Do you still find it to be the case?

 


My thread here at SA: https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/1775-bubbles/page/14/

2005 St John's Wort / 2006-2012 Lexapro 20mg, 2 failed attempts to stop, tapered over 4.5 months in early 2012

January 2013 started Sertraline, over time worked up to 100mg / July 2014 dropped from 100mg to 75mg, held for six months

2015 tapered to 50mg over several months, held for several months, some more drops

2016 Feb 35mg, 6 Mar 33mg, more drops (note big drop (calc error) & up to 25mg), more drops (about 2mg at a time)

2017 - more small drops, more long holds

2018 March at 11mg;  April 20 9mg; June 11 8.1mg; (July 10 7.7mg / July 18 7.3mg); ( Sept 2 7.2mg, Sept 5 7.1mg, Sept 9 7mg); 30 Sept 6.5mg, ? 6mg, 23 Nov 5.5mg) 19 Dec 5mg

2019 (micro drops over two weeks 24 Mar 4.9mg, 28 Mar 4.8mg, 31 Mar 4.7mg, 4 Apr 4.6mg, 7 Apr 4.5mg / 22 April 4.4mg, 26 April 4.3mg, 2 May 4.2mg, 5 May 4.1mg, 9 May 4mg), 3 Oct 3.9mg, (20 Oct 3.8mg, 27 Oct 3.7mg, 3 Nov 3.6mg), 24 Nov 3.5mg, 8 Dec 3.4mg, 15 Dec 3.3mg, 22 Dec 3.2mg

2020 19 Jan 3.1mg, 26 Jan 3.0mg; 1 Mar 2.9, 7 Mar 2.8, May (some drops here) 24 May 2.5, May 29 2.4, June 21 2.3, June 28 2.2mg,  July 4 2.1mg, July 24 (or maybe a bit before) 2mg

Current Sertraline: July 24: 2 mg / Armour Thyroid / endless allergy meds, erg

Share this post


Link to post
JanCarol

Hey Bubbles - yes, I do find that to be true - however - there are still plenty of people on antidepressants here!  So - for the USA - imagine what Aussie docs prescribe X 3 or X 5.  

 

The play fell by the wayside - it was - too radical, too controversial for this cow-town and I had difficulty finding someone who understands well enough to help me with it.

 

The dominant paradigm of "oh you're sick, take your meds" is still, well, dominant!

 

I still have my notes.  I've submitted artwork to Mad In America.  I bang my drum in Shaman Circle - so I'm still in the Spirit of the Thing (my Drum is like my personal revolution - bringing Revelations one drumbeat at a time!)

 

ShamanExplorations_TripleGoddessDrums.jp

 

 


"Easy, easy - just go easy and you'll finish." - Hawaiian Kapuna

 

Holding is hard work, holding is a blessing. Give your brain time to heal before you try again.

 

My suggestions are not medical advice, you are in charge of your own medical choices.

 

A lifetime of being prescribed antidepressants that caused problems (30 years in total). At age 35 flipped to "bipolar," but was not diagnosed for 5 years. Started my journey in Midwest United States. Crossed the Pacific for love and hope; currently living in Australia.   CT Seroquel 25 mg some time in 2013.   Tapered Reboxetine 4 mg Oct 2013 to Sept 2014 = GONE (3 years on Reboxetine).     Tapered Lithium 900 to 475 MG (alternating with the SNRI) Jan 2014 - Nov 2014, tapered Lithium 475 mg Jan 2015 -  Feb 2016 = GONE (10 years  on Lithium).  Many mistakes in dry cutting dosages were made.


The tedious thread (my intro):  JanCarol ☼ Reboxetine first, then Lithium

The happy thread (my success story):  JanCarol - Undiagnosed  Off all bipolar drugs

My own blog:  https://shamanexplorations.com/shamans-blog/

 

 

I have been psych drug FREE since 1 Feb 2016!

Share this post


Link to post
bubbles

I'm sorry to hear the play went by the wayside. :(

 

Interesting re the 3-5 times!! I do notice that few people here are on benzos and they seem very common in the US. Lots of antidepressants, though.


My thread here at SA: https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/1775-bubbles/page/14/

2005 St John's Wort / 2006-2012 Lexapro 20mg, 2 failed attempts to stop, tapered over 4.5 months in early 2012

January 2013 started Sertraline, over time worked up to 100mg / July 2014 dropped from 100mg to 75mg, held for six months

2015 tapered to 50mg over several months, held for several months, some more drops

2016 Feb 35mg, 6 Mar 33mg, more drops (note big drop (calc error) & up to 25mg), more drops (about 2mg at a time)

2017 - more small drops, more long holds

2018 March at 11mg;  April 20 9mg; June 11 8.1mg; (July 10 7.7mg / July 18 7.3mg); ( Sept 2 7.2mg, Sept 5 7.1mg, Sept 9 7mg); 30 Sept 6.5mg, ? 6mg, 23 Nov 5.5mg) 19 Dec 5mg

2019 (micro drops over two weeks 24 Mar 4.9mg, 28 Mar 4.8mg, 31 Mar 4.7mg, 4 Apr 4.6mg, 7 Apr 4.5mg / 22 April 4.4mg, 26 April 4.3mg, 2 May 4.2mg, 5 May 4.1mg, 9 May 4mg), 3 Oct 3.9mg, (20 Oct 3.8mg, 27 Oct 3.7mg, 3 Nov 3.6mg), 24 Nov 3.5mg, 8 Dec 3.4mg, 15 Dec 3.3mg, 22 Dec 3.2mg

2020 19 Jan 3.1mg, 26 Jan 3.0mg; 1 Mar 2.9, 7 Mar 2.8, May (some drops here) 24 May 2.5, May 29 2.4, June 21 2.3, June 28 2.2mg,  July 4 2.1mg, July 24 (or maybe a bit before) 2mg

Current Sertraline: July 24: 2 mg / Armour Thyroid / endless allergy meds, erg

Share this post


Link to post

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

Terms of Use Privacy Policy