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Withdrawal causing intrusive or repetitive thoughts, rumination, and increased panic?

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Coopergirl1

Can I just please vent for a second. I am tapering after a CT of Lexapro and reinstatement taper now..and at a party with my boyfriend I shook the hand of his friend to say " good game " after we all had played a game and my mind was telling me when you shake his hand squeeze it a certain way because you obviously like him etc and while I do think he's attractive I am happy with my relationship. Instead of running I did shake his hand and I feel I squeeze it in the way my brain told me to. Did I just give into an intrusive thought? I feel so guilty please help. I'm sorry if I sound silly I just cant stop replaying it.

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genlady

While tapering off Seroquel I had intrusive thoughts which came as someone calling me names; swear words I would never use; negative statements about everything I said or did, using terminology that was very offensive.  They have stopped now.   I felt like there were more than one of me talking to me. 

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Dez

I've recently had intrusive...feelings? It's like I don't get the thoughts very much but I get the feeling of wanting to die a lot. It's terrifying because it's so untrue! Not planning it out, not thinking of how to do it or when, nothing like that. Just feeling the want to die or like it's going to happen. I'm so scared! Days like those just cause bawling my eyes out until there's nothing left, but they can be overwhelming.

 

I've promised loved ones that self harm and suicide are things I'd never do, I'd always search for help first. It's really hard when you don't have a counselor to trust and you're untrusting of the psychiatrist.

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Waiting12

I'm just wondering when others' intrusive thoughts went away. Was it a gradual change or windows and waves type thing? I never ever had thoughts like this before my kindling reaction. They are terrifying and make me feel like a crazy person. If this symptom alone went away I would be SO much better off. I'm really needing some hope, reassurance that this is normal or any kind words.

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mFrustrated

Waiting12, I'm wondering the same thing but I don't think anyone really knows. I'm trying to learn to accept them and move on. The neuro emotions often get in the way and that's what make them so scary for me. Right now it's driving in the car, especially on bridges or near water when I have those thoughts of "what if I just drive my car straight off..." it causes major anxiety when driving over and I find myself gripping the steering wheel and focusing hard to get over. Any advice someone would give would be greatly appreciated.

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minu

I have read some threads here about rumination and the "Emotional Spirals" thread. I was wondering if anyone else has these issues though? It would be nice to talk to someone else who is going through this. In the beginning of my Phase II I was having really bad rumination. It's like thoughts would get stuck in my head on repeat for hours and HOURS. It seems to happen less now, but sometimes I can get the smallest trigger and then it's like my brain goes into puzzle solving mode. Running through a million thoughts, trying to organize them or make sense of them...like I'm trying to figure out a puzzle. That's when a wave hits and I'll be out of commission for days...4-6 days maybe at a time. The whole time the puzzle is running through my head and I get no break. It's so hard to focus on anything else let alone figure out how to break the cycle. I feel like it would be helpful for me to find a trigger to get me out of it...like a positive trigger? I'm not really sure what to do though. 

 

Has anyone else had this problem? How do you cope?

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papaloapan

Hi. I also have this problem of intrusive and repetitive thoughts. It is logical for all of us to have this horrible adverse effect and withdrawal effect because one psychiatrist told me that psychiatric drugs affect our thinking, and if these psychiatric drugs are crap, of course they damage our brain and therefore we end up having these horrible intrusive and repetitive thoughts. It has been terrible for me because they don't let me do my mindfulness meditation in which I try to be aware and to observe the thoughts that emerge in my mind rather than getting lost in them unawerely. I was able to do it but just yesterday that I did a reduction of tramadol, I was not able to observe my thoughts, they were just impossible to control. It was so frustrating. They also won't let me focus.

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thecowisback

i really need some success stories about this withdrawal symptom. my mind is just filled constantly with never-ending thoughts, worries, problem solving, questioning. it's never, ever quiet and it's driving me crazy. i took prozac for ocd but it was never ever this bad before i took the meds. since coming off the past year has been a nightmare of constant rumination and panic and it doesn't seem to be getting any better. 

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thecowisback

just replying to this post myself as i forgot to turn on the notifications button. 

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Noloft

I suffer from lots of intrusive thoughts, both while on meds and while off them. Much worse now that I am off and the content is darker and more morbid, and it is tough for me to use my conscious "voice" that is me to separate myself from them, as that voice seems slowed down and lagged almost like I were drunk. I also have this wonderful new type of intrusive thought that I get when I am closing my eyes attempting to fall asleep.  It feels like a dream while I am awake and it usually involved someone else I have never met--my mind created this vivid recreation of some scenario that has nothing to do with me or my situation. It is distressing. But I try to remind myself I didn't always have these thoughts and the liklihood I will always have them now is low. I wish I could come up for an example for you all but they are very tough to remember and feels like some sort of glitch in the sleep/wake cycle. I am hoping this passes with time so that I can look forward to sleeping again instead of dreading it. I do not have much at all to look forward to these days, being emotionally numb and feeling brain damaged and not myself. 

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jonnypeters1234567
On 9/7/2018 at 11:44 PM, Noloft said:

I suffer from lots of intrusive thoughts, both while on meds and while off them. Much worse now that I am off and the content is darker and more morbid, and it is tough for me to use my conscious "voice" that is me to separate myself from them, as that voice seems slowed down and lagged almost like I were drunk. I also have this wonderful new type of intrusive thought that I get when I am closing my eyes attempting to fall asleep.  It feels like a dream while I am awake and it usually involved someone else I have never met--my mind created this vivid recreation of some scenario that has nothing to do with me or my situation. It is distressing. But I try to remind myself I didn't always have these thoughts and the liklihood I will always have them now is low. I wish I could come up for an example for you all but they are very tough to remember and feels like some sort of glitch in the sleep/wake cycle. I am hoping this passes with time so that I can look forward to sleeping again instead of dreading it. I do not have much at all to look forward to these days, being emotionally numb and feeling brain damaged and not myself. 

 

I had this last night. Half my brain was asleep and half was awake

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Catlinv

I suffer terribly from this.  I find myself sometimes not knowing awake or asleep?  Mine are always catastrophic events that end with a sort of cliffhanger so recovering is difficult in that I obsess on the thoughts/dreams and try to find resolutions, which is impossible because it’s not real.  This all leads the a mess in my head, swirling thoughts, inability to concentrate, headaches and a deep desire for it all to end.  Hopelessness has taken deep root in my mind.  There is no end.   Down to 42 beads of Cymbalta and the closer I get the worse I feel...

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Junglechicken

Have recognised that I'm very much in this "zone" of thinking.

 

Won't be starting CBT for another 2 weeks (when my weight loss course finishes).

 

Unable to tackle too many things at once so one big thing at a time.

 

Repetitive intrusive thoughts about abusive family members - obsession, hatred etc.,

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noearthlyfamily

i have uncrontrollable intrusive/repetitive intrusive thoughts also. worse when i'm going through a wave, when my brain is trying to figure out how to rewire/where to put the new synapses lol. it's electrical. the butons which say "cry now" get pissed now" "pity party now" etc are all confused with buttons that say"be joyful now" "laugh hysterically now" and "don't care about anything now" and it's like somebody switched the wires so i act and feel inappropraitealy to the current situation a lot. silence is my friend but also my enemy, because if i say what i feel it can backfire but holding it in can also backfire. what to do? ride the waves i guess...

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