Sean: Lexapro Withdrawal - Reinstated...

[Sean]

I just recently started tapering the topomax 25 mg. A pharmacy nearby does compounding, and my insurance covers a couple of dollars of it, so figured it would be worth it to go that route.

 

I noticed the link in your sig, Scally, for the spreadsheet for dose tapering...thanks for putting that there, it's really helpful! I did have a question about the tabs though...do I go by the "standard" taper or "microdoses?" My first reduction is at 22.5...but after that the numbers start getting funky after the decimal. I just want to make sure I'm doing this right and getting the "full" 10% reduction and not going over. I forgot to mention I suck at math :/ haha

[ChessieCat]

It is better to round the number up.  If you round it down you will be reducing by more than 10%.

 

If you can't create the next dose of 20.3 you go to 20.5.  To calculate your next dose enter 20.5 in the green starting dose cell.  The next reduction would be to 18.5.

 

It also depends on what doses you can create.  You may be able to create your doses with x.25 x.50 and x.75.  So if the dose calculation ends up being x.60 you could round up to x.75.

[Sean]

Thanks for the info, Chessie

 

After my first week of tapering, I haven't had any issues. *fingers crossed* I was expecting maybe some dizziness and headaches, but so far I've only had one minor headache. 

 

I also scheduled an acupuncture appointment. The earliest time that fit my schedule was a month from now, but I figured I'd give it a shot while I do this taper. I've read that it can help with headaches and migraines, so figured it couldnt hurt. Has anyone tried this before?

[ChessieCat]

Here is SA's discussion:  Acupuncture - Posts #6 & #8 (not detox or stimulation)

 

To search the site I use google.  In this instance I would type in survivingantidepressants.org acupuncture

[Sean]

Thank you Chessie!

[Cipramillion]

I've tried accupuncture. At first it helped with my akathisia and headpressure. I went to a very experienced guy who was a doctor who had specialized in neurological disorders and knew a lot about fight or flight mechanisms and autonomic dysfunction. He used very few needles and only for about 10-15 minutes. I was so sensitive.

 

Then another guy took over while he was on holiday. The treatment he gave me made me much worse, and Im not sure Im fully healed from that even after 14 months. He used ear accupuncure ++ If you want to try this, make sure you see someone with a lot of experience and who respect your nervous system. Start with only a few needles and short intervention and take it from there. Good luck!

[Sean]

Thanks, Cipramillion With the ear acupuncture, did he give you any stimulation or detox treatments?

 

I've read mostly good things about acupuncture during WD's, but I get a little nervous when I see someone like yourself, and a few others, have a bad experience. I know during WD's, there's a lot of factors that could determine good/bad experiences. I'm currently about 3 years in to my WD's, and I re-instated with another anti-depressant and have been stabilized for a little while, so I know my experience could be different than from someone who is 1 year into WD's and has not re-instated. I just dont want to "undo" the progress I've made so far. I'll be sure to update with how it goes...got my fingers crossed!

[Sean]

So I havent updated this thread in a really long time, so I figured I'd stop by to share my progress and hopefully give someone hope out there that's reading this that things will get better!

 

Since my last update, I stopped immediately with acupuncture. After the second session, I started to have hiccups...a lot! They lasted 3 weeks, non-stop...even when I tried to sleep. Apparently, my phrenic nerve got aggravated from one of the needles. A trip to the ER and doctor later, I was done with trying that. It was just added torture on to everything else I was having to deal with form the WD's. After a few months passed, I finally got to the point where I felt comfortable with the idea of working out again. The dizziness/light headedness had eased up enough where I could lay down flat to do bench presses, ab exercises, etc...so figured it was worth a shot to help me feel better. My ultimate goal was to feel better...not necessarily look better or anything like that, I knew all of that would come along with working out. So my wife and I decided to join the ymca here in town. Its very family oriented for us and for our 3 year old...and they have free babysitting for 1 night a month, so that was awesome! Fast forwarding ahead a few months, I start to notice improvements pretty quickly. I was still having physical symptoms (headaches, dizziness/light headedness) but they weren't as severe or frequent. The depression and anxiety started to ease up as well. I decided to pair up with a gym coach for a 6 month plan to help me achieve some goals. It really was the best decision I could have made looking back on it. We started discussing how to lose weight with dieting and my exercise plans. I started dieting and watching what I ate and drank on a daily basis. I started drinking water a lot more to the point where that was all I drank, except on Saturday when we had a "cheat" day to eat whatever we wanted  After a few months of dieting plus exercising, the changes have been night and day. I feel so much better and my wife and I have lost a combined weight of 100 lbs. It's brought us closer together and our family closer together...and it's been something that we all enjoy and it's healthy. 

 

In this time, I've also been tapering my topamax and I'm now at 4.2mg. Once I'm done tapering off that, I plan on starting tapering from celexa. That will be about a year and a half down the road though, so I believe this gives my body plenty of time to adjust and get as stabilized as possible. 

 

Thanks again to everyone for your help through all of this...I cant thank you all enough  

[Bonzee]

Hey Sean,

 

How did you feel when you stopped Lexapro CT? Did you feel anything different at all? You were on the drug for quite some time. Also, could you explain a bit what you felt when you reinstated the Lexapro at full dose? I'm glad you've stabilized on Celexa, as Alto stated back then they are basically the same drug, Lexapro is the (S)-enantiomer, which is the left "mirror" of the drug, whereas Celexa has both the left and right opposite "mirrors". Lexapro is indeed the more powerful drug. 

 

Thanks

[Sean]

55 minutes ago, Bonzee said:

Hey Sean,

 

How did you feel when you stopped Lexapro CT? Did you feel anything different at all? You were on the drug for quite some time. Also, could you explain a bit what you felt when you reinstated the Lexapro at full dose? I'm glad you've stabilized on Celexa, as Alto stated back then they are basically the same drug, Lexapro is the (S)-enantiomer, which is the left "mirror" of the drug, whereas Celexa has both the left and right opposite "mirrors". Lexapro is indeed the more powerful drug. 

 

Thanks

 

Hey Bonzee

 

When I first stopped Lexapro, I initially had some light headedness/dizziness that lasted about a month...that was after I quit cold turkey. It went away for a while, but a few months later I woke up with severe vertigo. That was back in about January of 2014. After that, that's when all of my symptoms got really severe (dizziness/vertigo, headaches, balance issues, depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts, etc.) It took me a few months to figure out what I was experiencing was WD's from Lexapro. So when I went to the doctor and decided to re-instate Lexapro, it made my symptoms worse. So we tried to decrease the dosage and I stayed there for a little while, but I still wasnt reponding well to it. That's when we tried switching to celexa. I'm really not familiar with the mirror references, so I cant really speak on that. But we did try at one point to increase the celexa dosage, but I didnt respond well to it, so we decreased it back to the original dosage. From that point on, I just kept riding the waves and enjoying the windows. The waves slowly got less severe and less frequent, and the windows became bigger and lasted longer. It really wasnt until I started excercising and then dieting until I could really notice changes. Everything up to that point was slow progress and small changes. I had to use milestones, such as my birthday, to really notice any changes. I would see how I felt on my birthday and then think back on my birthday the previous year and reflect how I felt then so I could really see if I was making any progress. I would do the same think for days like Christmas, Halloween, etc.

[Bonzee]

Thanks for the update Sean. Sad that the healing takes so long with so much suffering, and no conventional recognized way to reduce symptoms 100%...what kind of diet and exercise plan did you start? I may start one for myself. I'm eating healthier, but exercise can be hard with all the anxiety. Have to take it slow I bet.

[Sean]

I know, it's very sad. My niece is actually going through ADHD withdrawals and it's very similar to AD withdrawals. She's only 13, so going through my own personal WD's and to start feeling better only to now watch her go through them is very sad and frustrating. She's living with us right now so my mom and myself can help her through this. She talks about suicide a lot...so I try to comfort her and let her talk and tell me what's going on. Then I try to explain what's going on with her brain and help guide her back into a positive mindset. I'm fortunate enough that I have experienced this and can try to help, otherwise she would be locked away in an institution. 

 

But for my diet, it's nothing too strict or any of these fad type of diets. I really just watch my calorie intake and cut out as much sugar as possible. My calorie intake level per day is 1500 calories and I drink strictly water, except on Saturday when we have a cheat day. I also do intermittent fasting where I eat in an 8 hour window. Basically I'll eat lunch at around 12-1pm, have a light snack after work and then have dinner all before 8pm. After that time, I dont eat at all until the next day at 12-1pm. I'm really just skipping breakfast...so it isn't too difficult. I drink lots of water in the morning to keep me feeling full. I also had really bad anxiety, so it took me a while to get over that before I even thought about going to a gym. I started out just going 3 days a week doing full body excercises and about 10 minutes worth of cardio. At first, it would make my symptoms a little worse and some symptoms re-appear...but that went away after a month or two. I started feeling better aside from that, so I stuck with it. After a while, all those WD symptoms just kinda went away. I just recently started going 5 days a week and have noticed some symptoms kinda popping up, but I know those will go away also with a little time. 

 

I definitely took it slow at first...it was really rough on my body for a little while. I just had to really listen to what my body was telling me and get past some of my anxieties about being around a bunch of people. I just put in my earphones to listen to my music and just tune everything out.

[Carmie]

Hi Sean, 

 

How are you doing? Sending hugs🤗

[Sean]

Hey Carmie! Sorry, I just realized you posted...I should probably turn on the notifications

 

I'm doing much better though since my last post. I'm still following my diet and working out 4 days a week. My symptoms have almost nearly resolved themselves except for some popping up from time to time...but when they do, it's for such a short period of time that they're more like a quick surge. The worst of my symptoms (headaches/migraines) has gotten a lot better. I may have a mild headache about once every couple of weeks. Which is a huge improvement compared to the migraines I got about 3 days a week and headaches the rest of the days. The dizziness/light headedness is pretty much gone. Every so often I get a quick surge or dizziness/light headedness for a couple of seconds at the most and then I'm fine. And every so often my balance feels funny like I'm slipping in a wet spot on hard surface floors when in reality I didnt even slip. It's a wierd feeling. I use to have those all the time and it made me feel uneasy walking anywhere with a hard surface like grocery stores and places like that.

 

Compared to where I was when all of this first started, it's night and day. I've stopped taking topomax completely now. I did a slow 10% taper over the past year and a half and got down to 1mg. I was going to take it to .5mg but the pharmacist said that I should be fine so I felt comfortable enough at that point to stop. My last dose was a few days ago, so I have my fingers crossed that I dont have any issues pop up. 

 

Thanks for checking on me!  Hope you are doing well!

[puthappinessfirst]

Very happy to have seen your thread, Sean. I am currently going through what you went through. With the same meds, but my OG med was Celexa. So happy to see you've stabilized and are doing so well! It gives me a lot of hope. Your Celexa taper will be awesome. 

[Sean]

Thank you! I'm just going to continue to let my body and nervous system heal for another year or so before I try tapering celexa. I'm a little nervous about how my body will react now that I'm not taking topomax. For the past few years, anything as simple as an acupuncture session has made my body have crazy reactions. My phrenic nerve got agitated from an acupuncture needle (to try and help with the migraines/headaches) and I ended up having hiccups 24/7 for 3 weeks...it was torture. Then I developed allergic reactions to ibuprofen. I finally listened to my body and just let it try to heal itself without any outside "help." 

 

It's been a wild ride, but I truly believe if we all can endure and survive this...we can battle anything and come out on top

[Carmie]

Hi Sean, 

 

Thanks for popping in and updating. Glad to hear you’re doing much better. 💚

Edited March 15, 2019 by Carmie

[Sean]

Long time no update!  

 

So I recently got a new job in a new city in October. We decided we wanted a change and we thought we'd better do it now while our son is still young (4 y.o), otherwise we'd never do it and be stuck where we were living. We weren't unhappy there, just ready for a change. So I started my job search, went through a few different job interviews and landed the job I wanted in the city that we were looking at. I felt great up until that point, then all of the stress of selling our house and re-locating started triggering some of my symptoms. My previous boss made it hell for me leaving my job and I had 2 severe panic attacks. I've never experienced one of those before. At first, I thought I was having a heart attack. It was one of the worst feelings ever. I was so pissed that I allowed someone to have that control over me so I went into work the next day, told him what a ****** bag he was and walked out before working my 2 weeks notice. I spent the next 2 weeks upgrading/repairing our house to put on the market and that was extra added on stress. We had planned a trip to Disney World that year so that 3rd week was the Disney trip, which was fun but exhausting! We got back and 2 days after returning, my wife said she was pregnant! 😯I was happy, but this only added on extra stress. One day later, I was on my way to my new job in a new city by myself to get things set up while my wife stayed behind with our son to wait for our house to sell. So. much. stress. 

 

So new job, new city, new people, new environment...new everything! You'd think I'd be happy that I was able to achieve all this for our family, but I was stressed and overwhelmed to almost my breaking point. This made it extra difficult at my new job trying to focus and gel with my new co-workers. I had a lot of symptoms resurface (dizziness/light headedness, anxiety, depression & brain fog) so dealing with all this change while trying to appear "normal" made things really difficult. What sucked was that everybody at my new job is really cool and laid back and share my same kind of twisted and sarcastic sense of humor, yet I couldnt really join in conversations like I wanted to b/c I was just too damn stressed or light headed or having brain fog, etc. On top of that, I'm already socially awkward as hell and it takes me a while to open up to people. I size people up and watch and observe before I allow others close to me. So I can only imagine how I came across to all of my co-workers. 

 

After a while, I made it a point to strike up little side conversations 1 on 1 with people just so they can see "me." I've always enjoyed joking with people and just cutting up, but for the past 2-3 months it's hard to be myself. I've just recently been able to let my guard down a bit and kinda relax while I'm at my new job. My diet is **** here lately and I havent been able to work out, so I know all of these things are factoring in to how I feel. 

 

My family is finally all here under the same roof, my wife starts her new job next week and we're starting the new gym after the holidays...so I cant wait to feel like I was feeling.