Hunger for knowledge much subdued. Is it the withdrawal or aging?

[LostInMarshes]

I recall getting these fuzzy feelings in my brain. A delicious, energizing spurt of neural activity letting me know that my brain was in prime state to learn something new. I'd get this sensation once in a while, a few times a year, I believe - and would start reading nearly every book in sight, hungry for knowledge and feeling joy at being able to satiate this lust.

 

Problem is, I can't remember the last time I had this feeling, and this is VERY alarming to me.

 

It's a bit over 3 years that I started tapering from Zoloft. I'm also about to turn 40. Is it my age that is the culprit, or is it the withdrawal?

 

Can anyone relate?

[Onmyway]

I have been so wrapped up in WD I've lost interest in many things including much curiosity about the world. And I'm a very curious person. It's just that WD is so all-consuming, that other things just seem unimportant. I didn't even realize until after that we had elections last week. I had forgotten the date. 

[oops44]

for me I noticed my hunger for and curiosity in life waning before I started the ADs, probably partly due to depression or whatever, partly just from getting older and knowing everything already, and partly due to being beaten down and disappointed and disillusioned with life.  

 

then I started taking the pills and they didn't make it any better.  after a while they started making it worse.  at one point I was sitting at home during a really intense thunderstorm and realized I had no desire to go out into it or even watch it from my porch.  that was uncharacteristic of me to say the least.  normally I would be running around on some sort of adventure through the rain.  after that I started noticing more and more things I just didn't care about anymore, including learning and improving myself.  everything was just bland.

 

I have since been making conscious attempts at trying to recapture the zest for life and the interest in living life with varying degrees of success.  throwing myself at life as it were.  some days are still bland and I still feel dull but I do have days when I truly feel alive, for better and for worse, but I had to make a conscious effort to let myself feel that way.  its gotten easier the more I do.  it does come back but hunger and curiosity are like muscles that atrophy without use so its important to exercise them to make them strong once again.

 

but of course you're talking about reading, which has nothing to do with whatever it is that im babbling about......

 

.....no, scratch that, what im babbling on about has everything to do with it!  the hunger to read and learn and the desire to feel and live are both fueled by the same fire, and that fire burns inside us all regardless of how many pills they give us.  we just need to learn to nurture the flame once again.