Barbarannamated Posted August 3, 2013 Share Posted August 3, 2013 Oh I'm sorry! {{{Group hug with Rhi and Rhiannon}}} Pristiq tapered over 8 months ending Spring 2011 after 18 years of polydrugging that began w/Zoloft for fatigue/general malaise (not mood). CURRENT: 1mg Klonopin qhs (SSRI bruxism), 75mg trazodone qhs, various hormonesLitigation for 11 years for Work-related injury, settled 2004. Involuntary medical retirement in 2001 (age 39). 2012 - brain MRI showing diffuse, chronic cerebrovascular damage/demyelination possibly vasculitis/cerebritis. Dx w/autoimmune polyendocrine failure.<p>2013 - Dx w/CNS Sjogren's Lupus (FANA antibodies first appeared in 1997 but missed by doc). Link to comment
Administrator Karma Posted August 4, 2013 Administrator Share Posted August 4, 2013 Hi Rhi I'm so sorry you are experiencing a wave ... I know how you feel ... it is so disappointing to fall back into it when we have experienced the otherside. I think yuck says it ... It will, pass you will feel well again. Karma hug Karma 2007 @ 375 mg Effexor - 11/29/2011 - 43.75 mg Effexor (regular) & .625 mg Xanax 200 mg Gabapentin 2/27/21 - 194.5 mg, 5/28/21 - 183 mg, 8/2/21 - 170 mg, 11/28/21 - 150 mg, 4/19/22 - 122 mg; 8//7/22 - 100 mg; 12/17 - 75mg; 8/17 - 45 mg; 10/16 40 mg Xanax taper: 3/11/12 - 0.9375 mg, 3/25/12 - 0.875 mg, 4/6/12 - 0.8125 mg, 4/18/12 - 0.75 ; 10/16 40mg; 1/16 0.6875 mg; at some point 0.625 mg Effexor taper: 1/29/12 - 40.625 mg, 4/29/12 - 39.875 mg, 5/11/12 - Switched to liquid Effexor, 5/25/12 - 38 mg, 7/6/12 - 35 mg, 8/17/12 - 32 mg, 9/14/12 - 30 mg, 10/19/12 - 28 mg, 11/9/12 - 26 mg, 11/30/12 - 24 mg, 01/14/13 - 22 mg. 02/25/13 - 20.8 mg, 03/18/13 - 19.2 mg, 4/15/13 - 17.6 mg, 8/10/13 - 16.4 mg, 9/7/13 - 15.2 mg, 10/19/13 - 14 mg, 1/15/14 - 13.2 mg, 3/1/2014 - 12.6 mg, 5/4/14 - 12 mg, 8/1/14 - 11.4 mg, 8/29/14 - 10.8 mg; 10/14/14 - 10.2 mg; 12/15/14 - 10 mg, 1/11/15 - 9.5 mg, 2/8/15 - 9 mg, 3/21/15 - 8.5 mg, 5/1/15 - 8 mg, 6/9/15 - 7.5 mg, 7/8/15 - 7 mg, 8/22/15 - 6.5 mg, 10/4/15 - 6 mg; 1/1/16 - 5.6 mg; 2/6/16 - 5.2 mg; 4/9 - 4.8 mg; 7/7 4.5 mg; 10/7 4.25 mg; 11/4 4.0 mg; 11/25 3.8 mg; 4/24 3.6 mg; 5/27 3.4 mg; 7/8 3.2 mg ... 10/18 2.8 mg; 1/18 2.6 mg; 4/7 2.4 mg; 5/26 2.15mg; 8/18 1.85 mg; 10/7 1.7 mg; 12/1 1.45 mg; 3/2 1.2 mg; 5/4 0.90 mg; 6/1 0.80 mg; 6/22 0.65 mg; 08/03 0.50 mg, 08/10 0.45 mg, 10/05 0.325 mg, 11/23 0.2 mg, 12/14 0.15 mg, 12/21 0.125 mg, 02/28 0.03125 mg, 2/15 0.015625 mg, 2/29/20 0.00 mg - OFF Effexor I am not a medical professional - this is not medical advice. My suggestions are based on personal experience, reading, observation and anecdotal information posted by other sufferers Link to comment
Eleriangirl Posted August 4, 2013 Share Posted August 4, 2013 Hoping this wave passes quickly for you Rhi! Jan - Zoloft 50mg (no titrating, cold turkey, severe allergic reaction) Feb - Vybriid 10mg (Only lasted 3 days on this stuff) Mar - Amitriptyline 10mg (Landed me in the ER with some serious Tachycardia, stopped at two weeks) Apr-June - Pristiq 50mg (9 weeks) June 10 - Started Prozac 10mg June 16 - Last dose of Pristiq 50mg with no taper June 26 - Prozac increased to 20mg to help with discontinuation with a plan to taper down once stabilized. July 1 - Pdoc concluded that while the discontinuation is unpleasant, it will not last forever and there was no need to change the dose of Prozac back down to 10mg. She confirmed that this reaction is not common, but is definitely a result of the Pristiq discontinuation and not a return of depression. (Guess that's good news!) July 4 - Back up to 1mg Xanax per day at .25mg every 6 hours July 8 - Drop to Prozac 5mg My Introduction Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus basildev Posted August 4, 2013 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted August 4, 2013 Rhi, I honestly don't think you COULD get any better at supporting the people here. Your advice and support is gold. I'm going to leave you with some advice that I've seen you give over and over again: Even though it might feel like this will be THE ONE time that the wave will last forever and you'll never get better, things always change. You'll get a window soon. I really hope it's soon for you. You deserve it xx July 2001 prescribed 20mg citalopram for depression;On and off meds from 2003-2006.February 2006 back on 20mg citalopram and stayed on it until my last attempt at tapering in September 2011.By far the worst withdrawal symptoms ever. Reinstated to 20mg citalopramOctober 2012 - found this forum!Nov 2012 to Feb 2013 did 10% taper, got doen to 11mg - was going great until stressful situation. Cortisol levels hit the roof, hideous insomnia forced me to updose to 20mg.March 2016 - close to 100% back to normal!****** I am not a medical practitioner, any advice I give comes from my own experience or reading and is only my perspective ****** Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Petunia Posted August 4, 2013 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted August 4, 2013 Hi Rhi, I'm sorry you are having a bad wave, they are so difficult to accept after having had windows. I hope you feel better soon. Petu I'm not a doctor. My comments are not medical advise. These are my opinions based on my own experience and what I've learned. Please discuss your situation with a medical practitioner who has knowledge of tapering and withdrawal...if you are lucky enough to find one. My Introduction Thread Full Drug and Withdrawal History Brief Summary Several SSRIs for 13 years starting 1997 (for mild to moderate partly situational anxiety) Xanax PRN ~ Various other drugs over the years for side effects 2 month 'taper' off Lexapro 2010 Short acute withdrawal, followed by 2 -3 months of improvement then delayed protracted withdrawal DX ADHD followed by several years of stimulants and other drugs trying to manage increasing symptoms Failed reinstatement of Lexapro and trial of Prozac (became suicidal) May 2013 Found SA, learned about withdrawal, stopped taking drugs...healing begins. Protracted withdrawal, with a very sensitized nervous system, slowly recovering as time passes Supplements which have helped: Vitamin C, Magnesium, Taurine Bad reactions: Many supplements but mostly fish oil and Vitamin D June 2016 - Started daily juicing, mostly vegetables and lots of greens. Aug 2016 - Oct 2016 Best window ever, felt almost completely recovered Oct 2016 -Symptoms returned - bad days and less bad days. April 2018 - No windows, but significant improvement, it feels like permanent full recovery is close. VIDEO: Where did the chemical imbalance theory come from? VIDEO: How are psychiatric diagnoses made? VIDEO: Why do psychiatric drugs have withdrawal syndromes? VIDEO: Can psychiatric drugs cause long-lasting negative effects? VIDEO: Dr. Claire Weekes Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Baxter Posted August 4, 2013 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted August 4, 2013 {{{HUGS}}} 1989 - 1992 Parnate* 1992-1998 Paxil - pooped out*, oxazapam, inderal 1998 - 2005 Celexa - pooped out* klonopin, oxazapam, inderal *don't remember doses 2005 -2007 Cymbalta 60 mg oxazapam, inderal, klonopin Started taper in 2007: CT klonopin, oxazapam, inderal (beta blocker) - 2007 Cymbalta 60mg to 30mg 2007 -2010 July 2010 - March 2018 on hiatus due to worsening w/d symptoms, which abated and finally disappeared. Then I stalled for about 5 years because I didn't want to deal with W/D. March 2018 - May 2018 switch from 30mg Cymbalta to 20mg Celexa 19 mg Celexa October 7, 2018 18 mg Celexa November 5, 2018 17 mg Celexa December 2, 2019 16 mg Celexa January 6, 2018 15 mg Celexa March 7, 2019 14 mg Celexa April 24, 2019 13 mg Celexa June 28, 2019 12.8 mg Celexa November 10, 2019 12.4 Celexa August 31, 2020 12.2 Celexa December 28, 2020 12 mg Celexa March 2021 11 mg Celexa February 2023 Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Rhiannon Posted August 5, 2013 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted August 5, 2013 thank you thank you thank you all for your support and kind words! You know how it is, probably: feeling worthless and unlovable and like nobody cares and it's too much trouble. You guys help me remember: maybe not so worthless and unlovable and maybe somebody does care and maybe I'm worth the trouble. Now I'm ready for the feeling better already SHEESH. part. Started on Prozac and Xanax in 1992 for PTSD after an assault. One drug led to more, the usual story. Got sicker and sicker, but believed I needed the drugs for my "underlying disease". Long story...lost everything. Life savings, home, physical and mental health, relationships, friendships, ability to work, everything. Amitryptiline, Prozac, bupropion, buspirone, flurazepam, diazepam, alprazolam, Paxil, citalopram, lamotrigine, gabapentin...probably more I've forgotten. Started multidrug taper in Feb 2010. Doing a very slow microtaper, down to low doses now and feeling SO much better, getting my old personality and my brain back! Able to work full time, have a full social life, and cope with stress better than ever. Not perfect, but much better. After 23 lost years. Big Pharma has a lot to answer for. And "medicine for profit" is just not a great idea. Feb 15 2010: 300 mg Neurontin 200 Lamictal 10 Celexa 0.65 Xanax and 5 mg Ambien Feb 10 2014: 62 Lamictal 1.1 Celexa 0.135 Xanax 1.8 Valium Feb 10 2015: 50 Lamictal 0.875 Celexa 0.11 Xanax 1.5 Valium Feb 15 2016: 47.5 Lamictal 0.75 Celexa 0.0875 Xanax 1.42 Valium 2/12/20 12 0.045 0.007 1 May 2021 7 0.01 0.0037 1 Feb 2022 6 0!!! 0.00167 0.98 2.5 mg Ambien Oct 2022 4.5 mg Lamictal (off Celexa, off Xanax) 0.95 Valium Ambien, 1/4 to 1/2 of a 5 mg tablet I'm not a doctor. Any advice I give is just my civilian opinion. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Skyler Posted August 5, 2013 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted August 5, 2013 As Basil said so well, I do not think you can get better... except I'll make that platinum. I admire the gentle way you have with a 'pen'. You text is alive and your presence is felt in loving words... I very much appreciated your following my AB 'saga' on my thread... I was on them for a month before coming off, thanks to a near case of pneumonia immediately following the cellulitis, and your messages were a comfort during my father's sickness and passing which coincided. Skyler As always, LISTEN TO YOUR BODY! A proud supporter of the 10% (or slower) rule. Requip - 3/16 ZERO Total time on 25 years. Lyrica: 8/15 ZERO Total time on 7 or 8 yrs.BENZO FREE 10/13 (started tapering 7/10) Total time on 25 years. Read my intro thread here, and check the about me section. "No matter how cynical you get, it's almost impossible to keep up." Lily Tomlin Link to comment
Administrator Altostrata Posted August 5, 2013 Administrator Share Posted August 5, 2013 Unbelievable! We love you to bits, Rhi. This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner. "It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein All postings © copyrighted. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Rhiannon Posted August 5, 2013 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted August 5, 2013 Wow, thank you. I'm trying to let it in. I get so down on myself. It's like my self-esteem or self-worth is 180 from how you guys feel about me. I can't remember right now if I feel this bad about myself all the time, but I suspect I don't. I remember EdTed has talked about this aspect of withdrawal some, the feeling so worthless. (It doesn't help that I've been trying to do Internet dating, I must admit! although putting that on hold for now.) Having cortisol "mornings" again after not having much trouble with that for so long. By the time I go to bed (early in the actual morning) I'm feeling pretty good and my mind's not going around in obsessive self-hating life-is-miserable-and-hopeless circles so much any more, but the next morning wham, it's back. But I did manage to sleep almost eight hours this past night, so that's good. I sent my boss an email saying I'd like to go to day shift when there's an opening. It's quite a bit less money, but there won't be an opening for at least a year I think, so I plan to save as much as I can. I definitely think the night shift is making the taper and withdrawal harder. Sheesh. Yuck. Haven't felt this bad since I came off the Neurontin last year. Well, like my friend Fred said when I told him what was going on, I'm doing all the "doing" things that can be done, now I just have to do the time. Started on Prozac and Xanax in 1992 for PTSD after an assault. One drug led to more, the usual story. Got sicker and sicker, but believed I needed the drugs for my "underlying disease". Long story...lost everything. Life savings, home, physical and mental health, relationships, friendships, ability to work, everything. Amitryptiline, Prozac, bupropion, buspirone, flurazepam, diazepam, alprazolam, Paxil, citalopram, lamotrigine, gabapentin...probably more I've forgotten. Started multidrug taper in Feb 2010. Doing a very slow microtaper, down to low doses now and feeling SO much better, getting my old personality and my brain back! Able to work full time, have a full social life, and cope with stress better than ever. Not perfect, but much better. After 23 lost years. Big Pharma has a lot to answer for. And "medicine for profit" is just not a great idea. Feb 15 2010: 300 mg Neurontin 200 Lamictal 10 Celexa 0.65 Xanax and 5 mg Ambien Feb 10 2014: 62 Lamictal 1.1 Celexa 0.135 Xanax 1.8 Valium Feb 10 2015: 50 Lamictal 0.875 Celexa 0.11 Xanax 1.5 Valium Feb 15 2016: 47.5 Lamictal 0.75 Celexa 0.0875 Xanax 1.42 Valium 2/12/20 12 0.045 0.007 1 May 2021 7 0.01 0.0037 1 Feb 2022 6 0!!! 0.00167 0.98 2.5 mg Ambien Oct 2022 4.5 mg Lamictal (off Celexa, off Xanax) 0.95 Valium Ambien, 1/4 to 1/2 of a 5 mg tablet I'm not a doctor. Any advice I give is just my civilian opinion. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Skyler Posted August 5, 2013 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted August 5, 2013 1) (It doesn't help that I've been trying to do Internet dating, I must admit! although putting that on hold for now.) 2) But I did manage to sleep almost eight hours this past night, so that's good. 3) I definitely think the night shift is making the taper and withdrawal harder. 1) Been there, done that, pit city. Very draining. 2) Yes!! 3) Nothin' like a 'lil sanity into the mix.. I would think the night shift is affecting more than your taper. I can't do nights... ended up with a scary episode of tachycardia in the wee hours some years back. Hard on the CNS for sure. As always, LISTEN TO YOUR BODY! A proud supporter of the 10% (or slower) rule. Requip - 3/16 ZERO Total time on 25 years. Lyrica: 8/15 ZERO Total time on 7 or 8 yrs.BENZO FREE 10/13 (started tapering 7/10) Total time on 25 years. Read my intro thread here, and check the about me section. "No matter how cynical you get, it's almost impossible to keep up." Lily Tomlin Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus basildev Posted August 5, 2013 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted August 5, 2013 It doesn't help that I've been trying to do Internet dating, I must admit! although putting that on hold for now.) Hey Rhi, I met my husband via internet dating 10 years ago! I agree with Skyler that is can be a bit draining and it's best left alone when you're feeling crappy - but well worth a go when you're feeling up to it again:) July 2001 prescribed 20mg citalopram for depression;On and off meds from 2003-2006.February 2006 back on 20mg citalopram and stayed on it until my last attempt at tapering in September 2011.By far the worst withdrawal symptoms ever. Reinstated to 20mg citalopramOctober 2012 - found this forum!Nov 2012 to Feb 2013 did 10% taper, got doen to 11mg - was going great until stressful situation. Cortisol levels hit the roof, hideous insomnia forced me to updose to 20mg.March 2016 - close to 100% back to normal!****** I am not a medical practitioner, any advice I give comes from my own experience or reading and is only my perspective ****** Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Rhiannon Posted August 6, 2013 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted August 6, 2013 Yes, the night shift is very challenging. Unfortunately I don't have as many options for survival and work at this point in my life as I would like, so of the options available it seems to be the one that makes the most sense, at least for the time being. It occurred to me just now that I'm probably about halfway through my taper (at three and a half years) and maybe it would be a good time for another three-month hold. The only other time I've done that was last summer when I went off Neurontin at the end of April and then held until after my daughter's wedding in July, and actually that was less than three months. If I'm recalling correctly I felt really good then and continued to feel good for several months. What with working nights it might be a nice thing to do for my CNS. Then again right now I'd settle for feeling just kind of normally not so great, like I usually do. Started on Prozac and Xanax in 1992 for PTSD after an assault. One drug led to more, the usual story. Got sicker and sicker, but believed I needed the drugs for my "underlying disease". Long story...lost everything. Life savings, home, physical and mental health, relationships, friendships, ability to work, everything. Amitryptiline, Prozac, bupropion, buspirone, flurazepam, diazepam, alprazolam, Paxil, citalopram, lamotrigine, gabapentin...probably more I've forgotten. Started multidrug taper in Feb 2010. Doing a very slow microtaper, down to low doses now and feeling SO much better, getting my old personality and my brain back! Able to work full time, have a full social life, and cope with stress better than ever. Not perfect, but much better. After 23 lost years. Big Pharma has a lot to answer for. And "medicine for profit" is just not a great idea. Feb 15 2010: 300 mg Neurontin 200 Lamictal 10 Celexa 0.65 Xanax and 5 mg Ambien Feb 10 2014: 62 Lamictal 1.1 Celexa 0.135 Xanax 1.8 Valium Feb 10 2015: 50 Lamictal 0.875 Celexa 0.11 Xanax 1.5 Valium Feb 15 2016: 47.5 Lamictal 0.75 Celexa 0.0875 Xanax 1.42 Valium 2/12/20 12 0.045 0.007 1 May 2021 7 0.01 0.0037 1 Feb 2022 6 0!!! 0.00167 0.98 2.5 mg Ambien Oct 2022 4.5 mg Lamictal (off Celexa, off Xanax) 0.95 Valium Ambien, 1/4 to 1/2 of a 5 mg tablet I'm not a doctor. Any advice I give is just my civilian opinion. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Jemima Posted August 6, 2013 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted August 6, 2013 thank you thank you thank you all for your support and kind words! You know how it is, probably: feeling worthless and unlovable and like nobody cares and it's too much trouble. You guys help me remember: maybe not so worthless and unlovable and maybe somebody does care and maybe I'm worth the trouble. Now I'm ready for the feeling better already SHEESH. part. You and I seem to be in the same place. That deep down feeling of worthlessness has been plaguing me for weeks. Just know that this is another wave and that it will end. Also please know that you've been a tremendous source of support to me, even while you're going through this miserable time. There is a great deal about you that is very, very good, far outweighing whatever real failings you may have (and we all have real failings). Sending hugs and blessings to you! P.S. I'm WAY ready for the next window, too. Psychotropic drug history: Pristiq 50 mg. (mid-September 2010 through February 2011), Remeron (mid-September 2010 through January 2011), Lexapro 10 mg. (mid-February 2011 through mid-December 2011), Lorazepam (Ativan) 1 mg. as needed mid-September 2010 through early March 2012"Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity." -Hanlon's RazorIntroduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1588-introducing-jemima/ Success Story: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/6263-success-jemima-survives-lexapro-and-dr-dickhead-too/Please note that I am not a medical professional and my advice is based on personal experience, reading, and anecdotal information posted by other sufferers. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Rhiannon Posted August 6, 2013 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted August 6, 2013 It doesn't help that I've been trying to do Internet dating, I must admit! although putting that on hold for now.) Hey Rhi, I met my husband via internet dating 10 years ago! I agree with Skyler that is can be a bit draining and it's best left alone when you're feeling crappy - but well worth a go when you're feeling up to it again:) Oh, I'll probably get back to it. I think it's very different at my age/demographic than younger, though. Plus I live in a rural, isolated area. So I don't have the highest of hopes. Still, it does get me out and about. Started on Prozac and Xanax in 1992 for PTSD after an assault. One drug led to more, the usual story. Got sicker and sicker, but believed I needed the drugs for my "underlying disease". Long story...lost everything. Life savings, home, physical and mental health, relationships, friendships, ability to work, everything. Amitryptiline, Prozac, bupropion, buspirone, flurazepam, diazepam, alprazolam, Paxil, citalopram, lamotrigine, gabapentin...probably more I've forgotten. Started multidrug taper in Feb 2010. Doing a very slow microtaper, down to low doses now and feeling SO much better, getting my old personality and my brain back! Able to work full time, have a full social life, and cope with stress better than ever. Not perfect, but much better. After 23 lost years. Big Pharma has a lot to answer for. And "medicine for profit" is just not a great idea. Feb 15 2010: 300 mg Neurontin 200 Lamictal 10 Celexa 0.65 Xanax and 5 mg Ambien Feb 10 2014: 62 Lamictal 1.1 Celexa 0.135 Xanax 1.8 Valium Feb 10 2015: 50 Lamictal 0.875 Celexa 0.11 Xanax 1.5 Valium Feb 15 2016: 47.5 Lamictal 0.75 Celexa 0.0875 Xanax 1.42 Valium 2/12/20 12 0.045 0.007 1 May 2021 7 0.01 0.0037 1 Feb 2022 6 0!!! 0.00167 0.98 2.5 mg Ambien Oct 2022 4.5 mg Lamictal (off Celexa, off Xanax) 0.95 Valium Ambien, 1/4 to 1/2 of a 5 mg tablet I'm not a doctor. Any advice I give is just my civilian opinion. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Rhiannon Posted August 6, 2013 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted August 6, 2013 thank you thank you thank you all for your support and kind words! You know how it is, probably: feeling worthless and unlovable and like nobody cares and it's too much trouble. You guys help me remember: maybe not so worthless and unlovable and maybe somebody does care and maybe I'm worth the trouble. Now I'm ready for the feeling better already SHEESH. part. You and I seem to be in the same place. That deep down feeling of worthlessness has been plaguing me for weeks. Just know that this is another wave and that it will end. Also please know that you've been a tremendous source of support to me, even while you're going through this miserable time. There is a great deal about you that is very, very good, far outweighing whatever real failings you may have (and we all have real failings). Sending hugs and blessings to you! P.S. I'm WAY ready for the next window, too. Jemima, the same to you, absolutely. Thank you. Started on Prozac and Xanax in 1992 for PTSD after an assault. One drug led to more, the usual story. Got sicker and sicker, but believed I needed the drugs for my "underlying disease". Long story...lost everything. Life savings, home, physical and mental health, relationships, friendships, ability to work, everything. Amitryptiline, Prozac, bupropion, buspirone, flurazepam, diazepam, alprazolam, Paxil, citalopram, lamotrigine, gabapentin...probably more I've forgotten. Started multidrug taper in Feb 2010. Doing a very slow microtaper, down to low doses now and feeling SO much better, getting my old personality and my brain back! Able to work full time, have a full social life, and cope with stress better than ever. Not perfect, but much better. After 23 lost years. Big Pharma has a lot to answer for. And "medicine for profit" is just not a great idea. Feb 15 2010: 300 mg Neurontin 200 Lamictal 10 Celexa 0.65 Xanax and 5 mg Ambien Feb 10 2014: 62 Lamictal 1.1 Celexa 0.135 Xanax 1.8 Valium Feb 10 2015: 50 Lamictal 0.875 Celexa 0.11 Xanax 1.5 Valium Feb 15 2016: 47.5 Lamictal 0.75 Celexa 0.0875 Xanax 1.42 Valium 2/12/20 12 0.045 0.007 1 May 2021 7 0.01 0.0037 1 Feb 2022 6 0!!! 0.00167 0.98 2.5 mg Ambien Oct 2022 4.5 mg Lamictal (off Celexa, off Xanax) 0.95 Valium Ambien, 1/4 to 1/2 of a 5 mg tablet I'm not a doctor. Any advice I give is just my civilian opinion. Link to comment
Barbarannamated Posted August 6, 2013 Share Posted August 6, 2013 Rhi, I understand that you're not feeling it now, but the strength and, well....*lifeforce* that you have ~ that you ARE ~ to have come through all that you have...is nothing short of AMAZING. I can't find words that adequately express my feelings of respect and admiration mixed with sadness and anger at what you've endured and overcome. I realize that was a terrible run-on, probably grammatically incorrect, sentence and paragraph, but I hope it conveys how I feel. Love, B Pristiq tapered over 8 months ending Spring 2011 after 18 years of polydrugging that began w/Zoloft for fatigue/general malaise (not mood). CURRENT: 1mg Klonopin qhs (SSRI bruxism), 75mg trazodone qhs, various hormonesLitigation for 11 years for Work-related injury, settled 2004. Involuntary medical retirement in 2001 (age 39). 2012 - brain MRI showing diffuse, chronic cerebrovascular damage/demyelination possibly vasculitis/cerebritis. Dx w/autoimmune polyendocrine failure.<p>2013 - Dx w/CNS Sjogren's Lupus (FANA antibodies first appeared in 1997 but missed by doc). Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus tezza Posted August 7, 2013 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted August 7, 2013 Add me to the worthless feeling list. Waves are hitting like scattered showers, it seems. I hope you feel better soon. I understand wishing for the " normal not so great" feeling. Hugs! http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1644-tezza-risperdal-withdrawal/ Seroquel and Mirtazipine Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Baxter Posted August 7, 2013 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted August 7, 2013 Rhi, about the internet dating...don't worry about the age factor. There are people YOUR age looking for a relationship. I met my now husband 4 years ago, at age 58. I definitely agree that finishing your taper before you start the man hunt may be a good move. I couldn't hack the symptoms while I was reactivating my love life - if he hadn't crossed my path, I probably would have soldiered on... for lack of anything else to do. DOes that even make sense? 1989 - 1992 Parnate* 1992-1998 Paxil - pooped out*, oxazapam, inderal 1998 - 2005 Celexa - pooped out* klonopin, oxazapam, inderal *don't remember doses 2005 -2007 Cymbalta 60 mg oxazapam, inderal, klonopin Started taper in 2007: CT klonopin, oxazapam, inderal (beta blocker) - 2007 Cymbalta 60mg to 30mg 2007 -2010 July 2010 - March 2018 on hiatus due to worsening w/d symptoms, which abated and finally disappeared. Then I stalled for about 5 years because I didn't want to deal with W/D. March 2018 - May 2018 switch from 30mg Cymbalta to 20mg Celexa 19 mg Celexa October 7, 2018 18 mg Celexa November 5, 2018 17 mg Celexa December 2, 2019 16 mg Celexa January 6, 2018 15 mg Celexa March 7, 2019 14 mg Celexa April 24, 2019 13 mg Celexa June 28, 2019 12.8 mg Celexa November 10, 2019 12.4 Celexa August 31, 2020 12.2 Celexa December 28, 2020 12 mg Celexa March 2021 11 mg Celexa February 2023 Link to comment
Administrator Karma Posted August 8, 2013 Administrator Share Posted August 8, 2013 Rhi - You are FANTASTIC ... I respect your knowledge and opinions so much!!! You will come through this wave and feel better... hang in there. Karma 2007 @ 375 mg Effexor - 11/29/2011 - 43.75 mg Effexor (regular) & .625 mg Xanax 200 mg Gabapentin 2/27/21 - 194.5 mg, 5/28/21 - 183 mg, 8/2/21 - 170 mg, 11/28/21 - 150 mg, 4/19/22 - 122 mg; 8//7/22 - 100 mg; 12/17 - 75mg; 8/17 - 45 mg; 10/16 40 mg Xanax taper: 3/11/12 - 0.9375 mg, 3/25/12 - 0.875 mg, 4/6/12 - 0.8125 mg, 4/18/12 - 0.75 ; 10/16 40mg; 1/16 0.6875 mg; at some point 0.625 mg Effexor taper: 1/29/12 - 40.625 mg, 4/29/12 - 39.875 mg, 5/11/12 - Switched to liquid Effexor, 5/25/12 - 38 mg, 7/6/12 - 35 mg, 8/17/12 - 32 mg, 9/14/12 - 30 mg, 10/19/12 - 28 mg, 11/9/12 - 26 mg, 11/30/12 - 24 mg, 01/14/13 - 22 mg. 02/25/13 - 20.8 mg, 03/18/13 - 19.2 mg, 4/15/13 - 17.6 mg, 8/10/13 - 16.4 mg, 9/7/13 - 15.2 mg, 10/19/13 - 14 mg, 1/15/14 - 13.2 mg, 3/1/2014 - 12.6 mg, 5/4/14 - 12 mg, 8/1/14 - 11.4 mg, 8/29/14 - 10.8 mg; 10/14/14 - 10.2 mg; 12/15/14 - 10 mg, 1/11/15 - 9.5 mg, 2/8/15 - 9 mg, 3/21/15 - 8.5 mg, 5/1/15 - 8 mg, 6/9/15 - 7.5 mg, 7/8/15 - 7 mg, 8/22/15 - 6.5 mg, 10/4/15 - 6 mg; 1/1/16 - 5.6 mg; 2/6/16 - 5.2 mg; 4/9 - 4.8 mg; 7/7 4.5 mg; 10/7 4.25 mg; 11/4 4.0 mg; 11/25 3.8 mg; 4/24 3.6 mg; 5/27 3.4 mg; 7/8 3.2 mg ... 10/18 2.8 mg; 1/18 2.6 mg; 4/7 2.4 mg; 5/26 2.15mg; 8/18 1.85 mg; 10/7 1.7 mg; 12/1 1.45 mg; 3/2 1.2 mg; 5/4 0.90 mg; 6/1 0.80 mg; 6/22 0.65 mg; 08/03 0.50 mg, 08/10 0.45 mg, 10/05 0.325 mg, 11/23 0.2 mg, 12/14 0.15 mg, 12/21 0.125 mg, 02/28 0.03125 mg, 2/15 0.015625 mg, 2/29/20 0.00 mg - OFF Effexor I am not a medical professional - this is not medical advice. My suggestions are based on personal experience, reading, observation and anecdotal information posted by other sufferers Link to comment
lexicon Posted August 8, 2013 Share Posted August 8, 2013 Rhi, thinking of you, and praying for relief, and a huge, wonderful window. I am in awe with all that you have endured, finding time along the way, to counsel encourage, and support.. Please think that "this too shall pass ".. Love, Lexi Hello, I am tapering Lorazepam, and my daily dose is 1.125 mgs. I followed a long hold for 5 months, ( Nov-March 2019) hoping to find some stability, but it did not work. So I resumed my taper and hold pattern. For the last 3 years, I have been using a daily microtaper, cutting .001mgs per day, with holds as needed. Symptoms are head pressure, labored breathing, palpitations, abrupt surges of dizziness, this being my worst symptom for now, internal tremors, my latest nemesis, unsteadiness, anxiety, plus many other symptoms that cycle in, and cycle out consistently. Not a day passes, without grief I take no other meds. January 2013 - 15 day quick taper off 10 mgs of Lexapro, and 25 mgs of Sertraline, at a detox clinic. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Rhiannon Posted August 8, 2013 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted August 8, 2013 Rhi,I understand that you're not feeling it now, but the strength and, well....*lifeforce* that you have ~ that you ARE ~ to have come through all that you have...is nothing short of AMAZING. I can't find words that adequately express my feelings of respect and admiration mixed with sadness and anger at what you've endured and overcome.I realize that was a terrible run-on, probably grammatically incorrect, sentence and paragraph, but I hope it conveys how I feel.Love, B Wow. Thanks Barb. I have so much admiration for you too. Started on Prozac and Xanax in 1992 for PTSD after an assault. One drug led to more, the usual story. Got sicker and sicker, but believed I needed the drugs for my "underlying disease". Long story...lost everything. Life savings, home, physical and mental health, relationships, friendships, ability to work, everything. Amitryptiline, Prozac, bupropion, buspirone, flurazepam, diazepam, alprazolam, Paxil, citalopram, lamotrigine, gabapentin...probably more I've forgotten. Started multidrug taper in Feb 2010. Doing a very slow microtaper, down to low doses now and feeling SO much better, getting my old personality and my brain back! Able to work full time, have a full social life, and cope with stress better than ever. Not perfect, but much better. After 23 lost years. Big Pharma has a lot to answer for. And "medicine for profit" is just not a great idea. Feb 15 2010: 300 mg Neurontin 200 Lamictal 10 Celexa 0.65 Xanax and 5 mg Ambien Feb 10 2014: 62 Lamictal 1.1 Celexa 0.135 Xanax 1.8 Valium Feb 10 2015: 50 Lamictal 0.875 Celexa 0.11 Xanax 1.5 Valium Feb 15 2016: 47.5 Lamictal 0.75 Celexa 0.0875 Xanax 1.42 Valium 2/12/20 12 0.045 0.007 1 May 2021 7 0.01 0.0037 1 Feb 2022 6 0!!! 0.00167 0.98 2.5 mg Ambien Oct 2022 4.5 mg Lamictal (off Celexa, off Xanax) 0.95 Valium Ambien, 1/4 to 1/2 of a 5 mg tablet I'm not a doctor. Any advice I give is just my civilian opinion. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Rhiannon Posted August 8, 2013 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted August 8, 2013 Add me to the worthless feeling list. Waves are hitting like scattered showers, it seems. I hope you feel better soon.I understand wishing for the " normal not so great" feeling.Hugs! Oh sorry Tezza. I had a great day yesterday, thought maybe it was over, but today it hit again. Oh well. Not surprised. But really, really tired of it all. Started on Prozac and Xanax in 1992 for PTSD after an assault. One drug led to more, the usual story. Got sicker and sicker, but believed I needed the drugs for my "underlying disease". Long story...lost everything. Life savings, home, physical and mental health, relationships, friendships, ability to work, everything. Amitryptiline, Prozac, bupropion, buspirone, flurazepam, diazepam, alprazolam, Paxil, citalopram, lamotrigine, gabapentin...probably more I've forgotten. Started multidrug taper in Feb 2010. Doing a very slow microtaper, down to low doses now and feeling SO much better, getting my old personality and my brain back! Able to work full time, have a full social life, and cope with stress better than ever. Not perfect, but much better. After 23 lost years. Big Pharma has a lot to answer for. And "medicine for profit" is just not a great idea. Feb 15 2010: 300 mg Neurontin 200 Lamictal 10 Celexa 0.65 Xanax and 5 mg Ambien Feb 10 2014: 62 Lamictal 1.1 Celexa 0.135 Xanax 1.8 Valium Feb 10 2015: 50 Lamictal 0.875 Celexa 0.11 Xanax 1.5 Valium Feb 15 2016: 47.5 Lamictal 0.75 Celexa 0.0875 Xanax 1.42 Valium 2/12/20 12 0.045 0.007 1 May 2021 7 0.01 0.0037 1 Feb 2022 6 0!!! 0.00167 0.98 2.5 mg Ambien Oct 2022 4.5 mg Lamictal (off Celexa, off Xanax) 0.95 Valium Ambien, 1/4 to 1/2 of a 5 mg tablet I'm not a doctor. Any advice I give is just my civilian opinion. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Rhiannon Posted August 8, 2013 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted August 8, 2013 Rhi - You are FANTASTIC ... I respect your knowledge and opinions so much!!! You will come through this wave and feel better... hang in there. Karma Rhi, thinking of you, and praying for relief, and a huge, wonderful window. I am in awe with all that you have endured, finding time along the way, to counsel encourage, and support.. Please think that "this too shall pass ".. Love, Lexi Thanks to you both! The support in this forum is so great. I'm reminding myself constantly...this will pass, I have felt better (actually, had a window yesterday)...I will feel better again...hang in there...etc. Started on Prozac and Xanax in 1992 for PTSD after an assault. One drug led to more, the usual story. Got sicker and sicker, but believed I needed the drugs for my "underlying disease". Long story...lost everything. Life savings, home, physical and mental health, relationships, friendships, ability to work, everything. Amitryptiline, Prozac, bupropion, buspirone, flurazepam, diazepam, alprazolam, Paxil, citalopram, lamotrigine, gabapentin...probably more I've forgotten. Started multidrug taper in Feb 2010. Doing a very slow microtaper, down to low doses now and feeling SO much better, getting my old personality and my brain back! Able to work full time, have a full social life, and cope with stress better than ever. Not perfect, but much better. After 23 lost years. Big Pharma has a lot to answer for. And "medicine for profit" is just not a great idea. Feb 15 2010: 300 mg Neurontin 200 Lamictal 10 Celexa 0.65 Xanax and 5 mg Ambien Feb 10 2014: 62 Lamictal 1.1 Celexa 0.135 Xanax 1.8 Valium Feb 10 2015: 50 Lamictal 0.875 Celexa 0.11 Xanax 1.5 Valium Feb 15 2016: 47.5 Lamictal 0.75 Celexa 0.0875 Xanax 1.42 Valium 2/12/20 12 0.045 0.007 1 May 2021 7 0.01 0.0037 1 Feb 2022 6 0!!! 0.00167 0.98 2.5 mg Ambien Oct 2022 4.5 mg Lamictal (off Celexa, off Xanax) 0.95 Valium Ambien, 1/4 to 1/2 of a 5 mg tablet I'm not a doctor. Any advice I give is just my civilian opinion. Link to comment
flower Posted August 8, 2013 Share Posted August 8, 2013 Rhi you are an inspiration..as I struggle with this gabapentin I often look at your story for strength..I just cant seem to get anything right..I hate to see you suffer...We both know it will get better but time seems to stand still sometimes..I will send prayers your way.. Also I will light a healing candle for us both this morning. C/T Celexa and Trazadone on Jan.29th 2014 Prescribed 1mg of Klonopin every 6 hours on Jan.29th Began tapering Klonopin April 18th..stretching time between doses...at first one hour for 2 weeks then a half hour for app.10 days then another half hour 10days later. Presently at .25 three times a day..6 2 and 10pm. Trying to stabilize. Also still taking gabapentin 300mgs 2xs a day.. Link to comment
Barbarannamated Posted August 8, 2013 Share Posted August 8, 2013 Rhi, Glad to hear you're feeling a bit better. Your statement above keeps playing in my mind: "Oh, and all those fun thoughts about wanting my life to be over NOW and how everything is terrible and hopeless for real." I can wrap my head around all of the physical symptoms: insomnia, palpitations, sensitivity, even anxiety. But these soul-wrenching feelings of worthlessness and hopelessness that will never end are so CONVINCING and compelling. Any thoughts on what produces that?? It sounds like several of us are in that dark place. I dont mean to take your thread on a tangent. Perhaps I should start a separate thread. I'd love to hear your thoughts. B Pristiq tapered over 8 months ending Spring 2011 after 18 years of polydrugging that began w/Zoloft for fatigue/general malaise (not mood). CURRENT: 1mg Klonopin qhs (SSRI bruxism), 75mg trazodone qhs, various hormonesLitigation for 11 years for Work-related injury, settled 2004. Involuntary medical retirement in 2001 (age 39). 2012 - brain MRI showing diffuse, chronic cerebrovascular damage/demyelination possibly vasculitis/cerebritis. Dx w/autoimmune polyendocrine failure.<p>2013 - Dx w/CNS Sjogren's Lupus (FANA antibodies first appeared in 1997 but missed by doc). Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Rhiannon Posted August 11, 2013 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted August 11, 2013 Barb, I really don't know. I've had those kinds of thoughts ever since I started taking psych meds, at least since the first time I quit Prozac and went into withdrawal. I do find that exercise and social contact seem to help a little, but it's so easy to slide back down. Having a bad wave today and that just makes it harder to get out and do the things that help me feel better (like exercise and social contact). I do remember having that feeling that life is good and I'm happy to be alive--I know I used to feel that way most of the time before psych meds, and I feel that way during the better times now. But today it feels like it's just all a struggle, a slow uphill slog that never ends. Started on Prozac and Xanax in 1992 for PTSD after an assault. One drug led to more, the usual story. Got sicker and sicker, but believed I needed the drugs for my "underlying disease". Long story...lost everything. Life savings, home, physical and mental health, relationships, friendships, ability to work, everything. Amitryptiline, Prozac, bupropion, buspirone, flurazepam, diazepam, alprazolam, Paxil, citalopram, lamotrigine, gabapentin...probably more I've forgotten. Started multidrug taper in Feb 2010. Doing a very slow microtaper, down to low doses now and feeling SO much better, getting my old personality and my brain back! Able to work full time, have a full social life, and cope with stress better than ever. Not perfect, but much better. After 23 lost years. Big Pharma has a lot to answer for. And "medicine for profit" is just not a great idea. Feb 15 2010: 300 mg Neurontin 200 Lamictal 10 Celexa 0.65 Xanax and 5 mg Ambien Feb 10 2014: 62 Lamictal 1.1 Celexa 0.135 Xanax 1.8 Valium Feb 10 2015: 50 Lamictal 0.875 Celexa 0.11 Xanax 1.5 Valium Feb 15 2016: 47.5 Lamictal 0.75 Celexa 0.0875 Xanax 1.42 Valium 2/12/20 12 0.045 0.007 1 May 2021 7 0.01 0.0037 1 Feb 2022 6 0!!! 0.00167 0.98 2.5 mg Ambien Oct 2022 4.5 mg Lamictal (off Celexa, off Xanax) 0.95 Valium Ambien, 1/4 to 1/2 of a 5 mg tablet I'm not a doctor. Any advice I give is just my civilian opinion. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Rhiannon Posted August 11, 2013 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted August 11, 2013 Rhi you are an inspiration..as I struggle with this gabapentin I often look at your story for strength..I just cant seem to get anything right..I hate to see you suffer...We both know it will get better but time seems to stand still sometimes..I will send prayers your way..Also I will light a healing candle for us both this morning. Thank you, Flower. All healing thoughts and prayers are appreciated. Started on Prozac and Xanax in 1992 for PTSD after an assault. One drug led to more, the usual story. Got sicker and sicker, but believed I needed the drugs for my "underlying disease". Long story...lost everything. Life savings, home, physical and mental health, relationships, friendships, ability to work, everything. Amitryptiline, Prozac, bupropion, buspirone, flurazepam, diazepam, alprazolam, Paxil, citalopram, lamotrigine, gabapentin...probably more I've forgotten. Started multidrug taper in Feb 2010. Doing a very slow microtaper, down to low doses now and feeling SO much better, getting my old personality and my brain back! Able to work full time, have a full social life, and cope with stress better than ever. Not perfect, but much better. After 23 lost years. Big Pharma has a lot to answer for. And "medicine for profit" is just not a great idea. Feb 15 2010: 300 mg Neurontin 200 Lamictal 10 Celexa 0.65 Xanax and 5 mg Ambien Feb 10 2014: 62 Lamictal 1.1 Celexa 0.135 Xanax 1.8 Valium Feb 10 2015: 50 Lamictal 0.875 Celexa 0.11 Xanax 1.5 Valium Feb 15 2016: 47.5 Lamictal 0.75 Celexa 0.0875 Xanax 1.42 Valium 2/12/20 12 0.045 0.007 1 May 2021 7 0.01 0.0037 1 Feb 2022 6 0!!! 0.00167 0.98 2.5 mg Ambien Oct 2022 4.5 mg Lamictal (off Celexa, off Xanax) 0.95 Valium Ambien, 1/4 to 1/2 of a 5 mg tablet I'm not a doctor. Any advice I give is just my civilian opinion. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus areyouthere Posted August 11, 2013 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted August 11, 2013 Oh Rhi. I am thinking of you and sending positive vibes your way. I know how frustrating this can all be... how can a little thing cause such chaos in our brans/ life I just don't know. It is so hard to understand and so frustrating. You know it will get better but it is frightening and unsettling non he less. I hope that there is some consolation in knowing that all of us here understand 100% what you are going through right now. Please know that we all care and are sitting on the edge of our seats ready to jump up ad cheer you on when "this too shall pass"! RU + BIG HUG!!!!!! Fall 1995 xanax, zoloft. switched to Serzone 1996- spring 2003serzone/ xanax/ lightbox. b]Fall 2003- Fall 2004? Lexapro 10 mg. Light box /4 mg. xanax.[/b] 2004 - Fall of 2009 10 mg Lex, 150 mg Wellbutrin XL % 4 mg xanax November 2009- Sept. 2011 10 mg lex., 300 Well. XL, 4 mg Xanax [/b Sept.2012- July 2012 20 mg Lex 300 Well. XL, 4 mg Xanax My mantra " go slow & with the flow " 3/2/13.. Began equal dosing 5 Xs /day xanax, while simultaneously incorporating a 2.5 % drop ( from 3.5 mg/day to 3.4 mg/day) 4/6/13 dropped from 300 mg. Wellbutrin XL to 150 mg. Difficult but DONE! Down to 3.3 mg xanax/ day / 6/10/13 3 mg xanax/day; 7/15/2013 2.88mg xanax/day. 10/ 1/2013...... 2.5 mg xanax… ( switched to tablets again) WOO HOO!!!!!! Holding here… cont. with Lexapro. 1/ 2/2014.. tapered to 18mg ( by weight) of a 26 mg ( by weight) pill of 20 mg tab. lexapro. goal is 13mg (by weight OR 10 mg by ingredient content) and STOPPED. Feeling very down with unbalanced, unpredictable WD symptoms. 1/2/2014- ??? Taking a brain-healing break from tapering anything after actively tapering something for 1.5 years. So… daily doses as of 2/2/2014: 18 mg by weight Lex, 150 mg Well. XL, 2.5 mg xanax, down from 26 mg by weight Lex., 300 mg well. XL, 4 mg xanax in August, 2012. I'll take it. 5/8/14 started equivalent dose liquid./ tabs. 5/13/14 1.5 % cut. Link to comment
alexjuice Posted August 11, 2013 Share Posted August 11, 2013 Thoughts and good energy sending to you, Rhi. Hang in there and the better times will return again. The best of times are still yet to arrive for you. I 100% believe that... "Well my ship's been split to splinters and it's sinking fast I'm drowning in the poison, got no future, got no past But my heart is not weary, it's light and it's free I've got nothing but affection for all those who sailed with me. Everybody's moving, if they ain't already there Everybody's got to move somewhere Stick with me baby, stick with me anyhow Things should start to get interesting right about now." - Zimmerman Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Rhiannon Posted August 17, 2013 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted August 17, 2013 Well the hold is starting to pay off...I'm almost back to just normally cruddy I think. I've decided to go off night shift. I hate to lose the extra $400 a month that I badly need, but I'm just so tired of feeling sick so much of the time. I guess I should say I've decided to ask if I can go off night shift, it's a small lab and there's not a lot of room to juggle people, but I think there's someone on swing shift who wants to try nights and hopefully she'll trade shifts with me. We'll see. There are disadvantages to the swing shift too but you know how it is, you pick from the options life presents you with. Well, I do anyway. I'm also thinking about trying to find a job in the city. Feels really stressful and scary, the whole idea of applying for jobs and either not getting one, or getting one and then having to deal with all the changes. But I think in the long run if I can move there I would be glad I did, it's so lonely out here in the boonies. Anyway, wanted to let y'all know that sure enough, the hold seems to be paying off, gradually. Next time I'm going through a bad wave you can remind me that I do recover from them. :-) I think I'm going to hold until the end of August. Started on Prozac and Xanax in 1992 for PTSD after an assault. One drug led to more, the usual story. Got sicker and sicker, but believed I needed the drugs for my "underlying disease". Long story...lost everything. Life savings, home, physical and mental health, relationships, friendships, ability to work, everything. Amitryptiline, Prozac, bupropion, buspirone, flurazepam, diazepam, alprazolam, Paxil, citalopram, lamotrigine, gabapentin...probably more I've forgotten. Started multidrug taper in Feb 2010. Doing a very slow microtaper, down to low doses now and feeling SO much better, getting my old personality and my brain back! Able to work full time, have a full social life, and cope with stress better than ever. Not perfect, but much better. After 23 lost years. Big Pharma has a lot to answer for. And "medicine for profit" is just not a great idea. Feb 15 2010: 300 mg Neurontin 200 Lamictal 10 Celexa 0.65 Xanax and 5 mg Ambien Feb 10 2014: 62 Lamictal 1.1 Celexa 0.135 Xanax 1.8 Valium Feb 10 2015: 50 Lamictal 0.875 Celexa 0.11 Xanax 1.5 Valium Feb 15 2016: 47.5 Lamictal 0.75 Celexa 0.0875 Xanax 1.42 Valium 2/12/20 12 0.045 0.007 1 May 2021 7 0.01 0.0037 1 Feb 2022 6 0!!! 0.00167 0.98 2.5 mg Ambien Oct 2022 4.5 mg Lamictal (off Celexa, off Xanax) 0.95 Valium Ambien, 1/4 to 1/2 of a 5 mg tablet I'm not a doctor. Any advice I give is just my civilian opinion. Link to comment
wantrelief Posted August 17, 2013 Share Posted August 17, 2013 I am so glad to read you are feeling better, Rhi. It is good to know that waves do pass. I hope you get to change your shift - good for you for trying to make changes that will help you. Michele -1/06 - 3/07 Cymbalta. Fast taper (essentially CT); withdrawal symptoms after 4 mos (didn't realize was WD) -10/07: 100 mg Zoloft; 1 mg Klonopin - tapered off Klonopin after 4 mos. Several unsuccessful slow tapers of Zoloft; went up and down in dose a lot -Spring 2013 back on 1 mg Klonopin to counter WD symptoms; switched over 5-6 mos from Zoloft to 35 mg citalopram -Two attempts at slow tapering citalopram, always increased dose due to WD; also increased Klonopin to 1.25 mg in 2014, then to 1.5 mg in 2015 -8/17-9/17: After holding one year at 20 mg, feeling withdrawal symptoms due to stress - slowly increased to 25 mg. No change in symptoms after 6 months (? tolerance ?) - decided to start citalopram taper February 2018 (still on Klonopin 1.5 mg). Supplements: fish oil; magnesium; vitamin D3; curcumin Citalopram taper: 2/2018 - 12/2019: 25 mg - 11.03 mg I 2020: 10.89 mg - 7.9 mg I 2021: 7.8 mg - 5.26 mg I 2022: 5.2 mg - 3.36 mg I 2023: 3.3 mg - 1.47 mg 2024: 1/5/24: 1.44 mg; 1/19/24: 1.40 mg; 1/26/24: 1.37 mg; 2/2/24: 1.34 mg; 2/9/24: 1.31 mg; 2/23/24: 1.28 mg; 3/1/24: 1.25 mg; 3/8/24: 1.22 mg; 3/15/24: 1.19 mg; 3/29/24: 1.17 mg; 4/5/24: 1.14 mg; 4/13/24: 1.11 mg; 4/20/24: 1.09 mg Link to comment
Nikki Posted August 18, 2013 Share Posted August 18, 2013 HI Rhi....did not know that you went thru a bad spell. The feelings of worthlessness, and all that other lousy stuff is for me, what Healing refers to as Neuro Emotions. My daughter is helpful in reminding me when that happens is "that it is a chemical reaction - the drugs Mom, not you." You are a lovely lady with so much to offer us. So with that being said, "it was a chemcal reaction Rhi, the drugs, not you." Rhi I handed in a letter to TJMaxx to tell them that I will no longer be able to work night commencing the 26th. I can't do it anymore. It loused me up - Big Time. It changes everything for me. Sleep, (or lack thereof, eating when I come home so my digestive tract is not good either. I asked to work on Mondays only - Day Shift. If it can't be done, I will leave. So I totally understand the letting go of the night shift. It's rough on anyone. Thanks for being so helpful and an insipration. You really are a very positive person and that is a joy:) Intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1902-nikki-hi-my-rundown-with-ads/ Paxil 1997-2004 Crossed over to Lexapro Paxil not available at Pharmacies GSK halted deliveries Lexapro 40mgs Lexapro taper (2years) Imipramine Imipramine and Celexa Now Nefazadone/Imipramine 50mgs. each 45mgs. Serzone 50mgs. Imipramine Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus tezza Posted August 18, 2013 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted August 18, 2013 Rhi - You are FANTASTIC ... I respect your knowledge and opinions so much!!! You will come through this wave and feel better... hang in there. Karma There should be a "like" button!!! http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1644-tezza-risperdal-withdrawal/ Seroquel and Mirtazipine Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Rhiannon Posted August 18, 2013 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted August 18, 2013 Aww...thanks you guys! I might have spoken too soon, today was a little rougher, but I still think overall things are moving in the right direction. Just more slowly than I would like, OF COURSE. like as if it's ever NOT slower than I would like. Nikki I think I might have read a post by you where you said you were changing your work--did you mention that somewhere else? It actually inspired me--I mean, I had been thinking of getting off nights for a while, but it helped me get over the hump. Today I sent an email to my supervisor about it and we'll talk about it when I'm back at work later this week. Started on Prozac and Xanax in 1992 for PTSD after an assault. One drug led to more, the usual story. Got sicker and sicker, but believed I needed the drugs for my "underlying disease". Long story...lost everything. Life savings, home, physical and mental health, relationships, friendships, ability to work, everything. Amitryptiline, Prozac, bupropion, buspirone, flurazepam, diazepam, alprazolam, Paxil, citalopram, lamotrigine, gabapentin...probably more I've forgotten. Started multidrug taper in Feb 2010. Doing a very slow microtaper, down to low doses now and feeling SO much better, getting my old personality and my brain back! Able to work full time, have a full social life, and cope with stress better than ever. Not perfect, but much better. After 23 lost years. Big Pharma has a lot to answer for. And "medicine for profit" is just not a great idea. Feb 15 2010: 300 mg Neurontin 200 Lamictal 10 Celexa 0.65 Xanax and 5 mg Ambien Feb 10 2014: 62 Lamictal 1.1 Celexa 0.135 Xanax 1.8 Valium Feb 10 2015: 50 Lamictal 0.875 Celexa 0.11 Xanax 1.5 Valium Feb 15 2016: 47.5 Lamictal 0.75 Celexa 0.0875 Xanax 1.42 Valium 2/12/20 12 0.045 0.007 1 May 2021 7 0.01 0.0037 1 Feb 2022 6 0!!! 0.00167 0.98 2.5 mg Ambien Oct 2022 4.5 mg Lamictal (off Celexa, off Xanax) 0.95 Valium Ambien, 1/4 to 1/2 of a 5 mg tablet I'm not a doctor. Any advice I give is just my civilian opinion. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Rhiannon Posted August 23, 2013 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted August 23, 2013 Wow, woke up feeling sort of good! I love windows. Having, like, positive thoughts about the future. What is WRONG with me? (Jk.) As usual during this rough time I had forgotten that it is possible for me to actually feel good about being alive. Oh well, don't worry, it won't last. Still, it's a good sign. Started on Prozac and Xanax in 1992 for PTSD after an assault. One drug led to more, the usual story. Got sicker and sicker, but believed I needed the drugs for my "underlying disease". Long story...lost everything. Life savings, home, physical and mental health, relationships, friendships, ability to work, everything. Amitryptiline, Prozac, bupropion, buspirone, flurazepam, diazepam, alprazolam, Paxil, citalopram, lamotrigine, gabapentin...probably more I've forgotten. Started multidrug taper in Feb 2010. Doing a very slow microtaper, down to low doses now and feeling SO much better, getting my old personality and my brain back! Able to work full time, have a full social life, and cope with stress better than ever. Not perfect, but much better. After 23 lost years. Big Pharma has a lot to answer for. And "medicine for profit" is just not a great idea. Feb 15 2010: 300 mg Neurontin 200 Lamictal 10 Celexa 0.65 Xanax and 5 mg Ambien Feb 10 2014: 62 Lamictal 1.1 Celexa 0.135 Xanax 1.8 Valium Feb 10 2015: 50 Lamictal 0.875 Celexa 0.11 Xanax 1.5 Valium Feb 15 2016: 47.5 Lamictal 0.75 Celexa 0.0875 Xanax 1.42 Valium 2/12/20 12 0.045 0.007 1 May 2021 7 0.01 0.0037 1 Feb 2022 6 0!!! 0.00167 0.98 2.5 mg Ambien Oct 2022 4.5 mg Lamictal (off Celexa, off Xanax) 0.95 Valium Ambien, 1/4 to 1/2 of a 5 mg tablet I'm not a doctor. Any advice I give is just my civilian opinion. Link to comment
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