Baconneggs: No More Venlafaxine XR

[baconneggs]

I am a male in my late twenties. During my senior year of college, Fall 2005, I started feeling pulsations in my neck, having occasional panic attacks (usually when seated and unable to get up, especially in the car), and ultimately felt unable to swallow. I was 190 pounds and dropped to 150 within a couple of months. I saw several doctors including ENT, a speech pathologist, even a homeopath. Ultimately I went to a psychiatrist and went on zoloft/sertraline. I don't even recall the doses, it worked pretty well and my symptoms were mostly gone (although for whatever reason I still couldn't eat food in a moving vehicle). After a year or so my psychiatrist switched me to Effexor XR (I don't remember the precise history of switching from non-generic to generic venlafaxine, and I didn't feel any difference between the two). I don't recall my starting dosage, but within a year I was up to 300mg. My symptoms were all but gone (still had the issue in moving cars). For a few years I stayed with the same dose. At one point, around 2010, I upped the dosage to 375mg. I felt very confident during this time. I had always wanted to get off the meds, though, so eventually I started an aggressive taper. I made it down to 225mg but my swallowing symptoms returned, so I upped back to 300mg (never went back to 375) and stayed the course for another couple years. During this time, though I didn't realize it in the moment, I was extremely numb, emotionally insensitive, and selfish. As you can imagine, this caused significant issues in my marriage, which I had difficulty wanting to attend to. We are Christians, and eventually my wife told me she felt God was telling her I should be off all medication. I don't think she even recognized at the time the detrimental effect the medicine was having on our marriage, she simply felt God telling us it was time for me to get off.

 

I "tapered" for 3 or 4 days then just dropped cold turkey. The first 5-7 days of discontinuation were intense. I barely remember some of it. I vomited, couldn't drive, was terrified, had violent nightmares, of course brain zaps, utter confusion and dizziness, and pretty much all of the symptoms I've seen reported. After a week it improved some, and after two weeks I started feeling daily improvement. Ultimately, I felt a lot better. My emotional sensitivity had returned, I cried more, life felt more vivid. I felt like I had woken up from a 6 year dream and, looking back, my memory of those years on SSRI's and SNRI's is fuzzy. I regretted being on effexor during my marriage and the births of my children. I found myself emotionally closer to my wife, my children, even to God.

 

I then started finding myself feeling frequently overwhelmed and anxious. I had trouble managing multiple tasks. I started crying frequently. For brief periods, I thought my original conversion symptoms were coming back, but as of yet they have only returned occasionally and much less severe. Beginning about a month or two after getting off effexor, I have experienced intense anxiety, fear, and depression. It is difficult to function at work or at home. Everything overwhelms me. I constantly feel like crying. As I went off the medication in August, it's been about 5 months now. During most of the time I was on effexor, I took 1-2 mg lorazopam occasionally. I continued taking it some during withdrawal, but I stopped because it seemed to cause a "rebound" effect for my anxiety the next morning. I recognize it was likely a mistake to go from such a high dosage, for such a long period of time, and go cold turkey. I have no desire to go back on any medications. I find that fish oil has been helpful both during the acute phase and since then. Over the last two months there has been a lot of situational stress, and I have also found the anxiety and depression are worsening. It is nothing like my former symptoms. Those generally included mood swings, some depression, occasional panic attacks (usually in the car), and worst of all, the swallowing difficulty. This time around, it's intense terror/anxiety, worrying about every minor detail of my life, crying or wanting to cry (constantly holding it in at work). It is impacting me at work and at home. I imagine the effects are worse due to the extreme drop from 300mg to 0 in the span of a few days. Again, I really do not want to go back on any medication. It would feel like "starting over" and I don't want to repeat what I went through (even though this feels as bad or worse in some ways than the acute withdrawal).

 

So to summarize: About 5 years on effexor, mostly 300mg or higher, stopped essentially cold turkey 5 months ago, intense acute withdrawal followed by intense anxiety and depression.

[Jemima]

Welcome, Baconneggs. I'm sorry you're having such a rough time. What you're going through is antidepressant withdrawal syndrome. Those exaggerated emotions are so typical.

 

At five months out, reinstating Effexor would be an iffy proposition. Take your time and read through the "Symptoms and what helps" section for tips on how to get through this without taking any more drugs.

 

You'll find lots of good information and friendly, gentle support here.

[peggy]

welcome, Baconneggs!

 

Well, I guess you realise that your symptoms are from a too fast taper from a long time on a high dose of effexor. But, what to do now?.. you may find some help in the symptoms and self care forum. Fish oil is good and will likely help. It is unlikely that going back on effexor (which i note you don't want to do) will help you. Have you noticed some improvement over the five months? Trying to minimise stress, eating a good diet and getting some moderate exercise should help you.

[Altostrata]

Welcome, Baconneggs.

 

Jemima and peggy gave excellent advice. In particular, I suggest you look for the topics on magnesium in the Symptoms and Self Care forum, a lot of people find it helps anxiety, and fish oil, of course, that will help your nervous system heal.

[LostaDecade]

Wow, thank you so much for posting, Baconneggs. I know how difficult it is to try and explain stories in a single post. I'm still reading through yours, as it helps so much to know others have either gone through or are currently going through some of these terrible symptoms. As I've said before, I do not wish brain zaps on anyone, they scared the out of c*** out of me. I'm off Effexor for 6 months after 10+ years on and grateful many of the worst symptoms are fading, but still have plenty to deal with. Well, just wanted to thank you for posting and wish you well. I want to finish reading yours! :-)

[baconneggs]

Thank you for the responses. In respond to a question above, it feels like the symptoms have worsened over the 5 months. I find the symptoms come and go quickly, sometimes throughout the day. Over the last several weeks it's been more bad than good. I'm not sure I've had any "windows" lasting more than a couple of days, although situational stress may play a role.

 

I will continue to look into the symptoms and self-care sections as well as the rest of the site for information and suggestions.

[Jemima]

If you're having windows that last a couple of days already, you're doing well. When I first started to get them they were a matter of fifteen minutes to an hour.

 

A number of people on this forum who've cold turkeyed or tapered too fast from Effexor have experienced a setback at five months. I've got no idea why, but I've observed this too often for it to be a random occurence. Just take good care of yourself, be patient, and it will pass.

 

Now that you're getting windows, the end is in sight. It may not come as soon as you'd like, but the windows are a good sign that you'll recover in time.

[pmoreshead]

I am also five months off Effexor XR after taking it for four years and stopping cold turkey. I am seeking and finding encouragement from others who have recovered from all that I am experiencing in the way of mood swings, fatigue, anxiety, sadness, etc.... Sometimes the windows seem very small compared to the waves, but it definitely helps to read that the windows will get larger. I am doing all that I know to build up my health including supplements, exercise, meditation, rest, but it seems to be a very long process that I am impatient with. I really appreciate what I am reading on this forum and website.