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JustineMiller's SSRI Hell


JustineMiller

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I joined this forum this morning because I have been having some severe withdrawal symptoms after dropping my Mirtazipine from 7.5 to 3.75 2 weeks ago. The doctor told me to do 3.75 for 1 week, then nothing for 3 days, then start Wellbutrin. I did the 3.75 for 6 days, then went to nothing. I felt GREAT Sunday, Monday, and Tuesday. On Wednesday I started freaking out. Crying spells, panic attacks, confusion, headaches, jitters, brain "squeezes" (feels like someone is grabbing hold of the back of my brain and squeezing it.) Looked up Mirtazipine withdrawal on Internet. Decided to go back to 3.75 and NOT fill Wellbutrin script. (Previous trials with Paxil, Prozac, Celexa, Lexipro, Prozac, & Wellbutrin NOT successful.) Now on day #3. On this forum this morning, I read something about long term withdrawal symptoms lasting for months or years. Since I have had a really rough ride since I first withdrew from Prozac in 2010-11; I am going to sit down and make a thorough inventory of my drugs of choice, including psychopharms, and when and how I withdrew, and what happened. I have now made a commitment to myself to become free of all drugs in this lifetime, however long it takes, (assuming I don't come down with bone cancer like my mother did). I have been free of alcohol since 8/7/11; benzos since 9/15/11; and weed since 12/5/11. I am currently using prescribed doses of Lamictal, Seroquel, and Mirtazipine. THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH FOR CREATING THIS FORUM, & Talk to you soon. Justine.

6/96. 20mg. Paxil. 1 day.

2/02 to 6/09 Prozac 20-30 m & birth control

Spr07 to 6/09 Ativan or Xanax during menstruation.

June 2009: stopped bc pill. Last menstrual period.

2010-11: tapered off Prozac 30m- 5mg at a time to 5 to none.

April-May- 2011: Prozac 6 weeks. Celexa 3 days. Lexipro 3 days.

6/11 to 9/11: Ativan or Xanax daily.

9/15/11: wd Ativan quick taper.

10/11. +Lamictal

12/11. +Seroquel

12/21/11: start Mirtazapine. 15-30-45-30.

2/29/12.. stop Mirt. start Wellbutrin. stop WB, + Mirt.

June 2012; Mirt at 7.5 m.

4/02/13. Mirt down to 3.75. withdrawal symptoms. still on Lamictal & Seroquel.

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  • Administrator

Welcome, Justine.

 

How are you feeling now you've reinstated 3.5mg mirtazapine?

 

Why are you taking Seroquel and Lamictal? For withdrawal symptoms from your prior drugs? Are they helping at all?

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Welcome to the forum, Justine. I'm glad you found us.

 

There are several members of this forum who are tapering off Mirtazapine, among them one of our mods. As with many other antidepressants, the going seems to get roughest at the lower doses. I'm glad that you reinstated and are willing to take your time getting off the drugs. Being patient is often the hardest part of withdrawal!

Psychotropic drug history: Pristiq 50 mg. (mid-September 2010 through February 2011), Remeron (mid-September 2010 through January 2011), Lexapro 10 mg. (mid-February 2011 through mid-December 2011), Lorazepam (Ativan) 1 mg. as needed mid-September 2010 through early March 2012

"Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity." -Hanlon's Razor


Introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1588-introducing-jemima/

 

Success Story: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/6263-success-jemima-survives-lexapro-and-dr-dickhead-too/

Please note that I am not a medical professional and my advice is based on personal experience, reading, and anecdotal information posted by other sufferers.

 

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Justine,

 

I noticed on another thread your remark about not being able to taper more gradually because of your low-income health plan. Here are directions for making your own liquid medications from tablets or capsules:

 

Making Your Own Liquid from Tablets or Capsules

Psychotropic drug history: Pristiq 50 mg. (mid-September 2010 through February 2011), Remeron (mid-September 2010 through January 2011), Lexapro 10 mg. (mid-February 2011 through mid-December 2011), Lorazepam (Ativan) 1 mg. as needed mid-September 2010 through early March 2012

"Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity." -Hanlon's Razor


Introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1588-introducing-jemima/

 

Success Story: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/6263-success-jemima-survives-lexapro-and-dr-dickhead-too/

Please note that I am not a medical professional and my advice is based on personal experience, reading, and anecdotal information posted by other sufferers.

 

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Hi Justine,

 

welcome to the form - I'm glad you've found us.

 

I hope you stabilize soon.

July 2001 prescribed 20mg citalopram for depression;
On and off meds from 2003-2006.
February 2006 back on 20mg citalopram and stayed on it until my last attempt at tapering in September 2011.
By far the worst withdrawal symptoms ever. Reinstated to 20mg citalopram
October 2012 - found this forum!
Nov 2012 to Feb 2013 did 10% taper, got doen to 11mg - was going great until stressful situation. Cortisol levels hit the roof, hideous insomnia forced me to updose to 20mg.
March 2016 - close to 100% back to normal!



****** I am not a medical practitioner, any advice I give comes from my own experience or reading and is only my perspective ******

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Hi, I'm Justine, here is my story for starters. Thank you all for creating this forum. I really appreciate it.

 

 

June 1996. 20mg. Paxil. EXTREME AGITATION, insomnia, hives. Stopped immediately.

February 2002 to June 2009 Prozac & birth control pill. Some hypomania.

Spring 2007: started off script Ativan for severe PMMD/cramps.

June 2009: stopped birth control pill. Escalated marijuana for PMMD/cramps. Last menstrual period.

Summer/Fall 2010 to Winter 10-11: tapered off Prozac 30m- 5mg at a time to 5 to none.no supervision. Quit sugar/alcohol/gluten re: arthritis.

March 2011: joined N.A. for marijuana addiction. Use had become daily & heavy.

April-May- 2011: Prozac for about 6 weeks. EXTREME AGITATION

Celexa 3 days. EXTREME AGITATION. Lexipro 3 days. EXTREME AGITATION

June 2011 to Sept 11: Ativan & Xanax; both off script and on. Small dose.

8/6/11: last alcohol. (never to excess.)

9/15/11: withdrew Ativan quick taper. Joined A.A. LOST MY MIND. SEVERE PANIC ATTACKS FOR MONTHS.

October 2011. Started Lamictal. Helped me calm down. slowly up to 200m & back down to 25 due to eye problems. over about 6 months?

December 2011. Started Seroquel nightly 25 mg. for sleep.

12/5/11: Last intake of marijuana. Bad trip.

12/21/11: started Mirtazapine. 15 to 30 to 45 in couple weeks. SEVERE DEPPRESSION continued in waves.

2/29/12.. stopped Mirtazapine overnight as per doc's instruct.

started Wellbutrin 2 days later. 2 more days later: EXTREME AGITATION.

stopped WB, returned to Mirtazapine. Maybe on 30 or 15 m.

June 2012; Mirtazapine down to 7.5 m. on my own. informed doc later.

October 31, 2012. SEVERE DEPPRESSION Mirt up to 15 for 2 days on my own.

SEVERE DEPPRESSION. back to 7.5 m.

Thanksgiving 2012. started outpatient treatment program for trauma & child sex abuse survivors. (root cause of 40 years of severe PMMD/cramps). Treatment includes acupuncture 2 to 5 times per week.

April 1, 2013. still weekly episodes SEVERE DEPPRESSION doc consult.

Instruct: 7.5 Mirt to 3.75 for 1 week, then stop Mirt, start Wellbutrin.

Result: Mirtazapine to 3.75 for 6 days, took none for 4 days. FELT GREAT, then agitation, headaches, fatigue, confusion, crying spells, anxiety, dizziness, mild nausea, brain squeeze, jitters/shakes. Got on Internet to research ssri withdrawal.

April 11, 2013 re-started Mirtazapine at 3.75m; NO Wellbutrin.

still agitation, levelling out. Taking 6.75 to 12.5 m Seroquel in morning in addition to 25m Seroquel at night and 50 m Lamictal in morning.

6/96. 20mg. Paxil. 1 day.

2/02 to 6/09 Prozac 20-30 m & birth control

Spr07 to 6/09 Ativan or Xanax during menstruation.

June 2009: stopped bc pill. Last menstrual period.

2010-11: tapered off Prozac 30m- 5mg at a time to 5 to none.

April-May- 2011: Prozac 6 weeks. Celexa 3 days. Lexipro 3 days.

6/11 to 9/11: Ativan or Xanax daily.

9/15/11: wd Ativan quick taper.

10/11. +Lamictal

12/11. +Seroquel

12/21/11: start Mirtazapine. 15-30-45-30.

2/29/12.. stop Mirt. start Wellbutrin. stop WB, + Mirt.

June 2012; Mirt at 7.5 m.

4/02/13. Mirt down to 3.75. withdrawal symptoms. still on Lamictal & Seroquel.

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Oh my Goddess, what a journey! Whew! Oh, we have all been there, or many of us anyway. Sigh...

 

Well, hang on now, if you can. You need some time to stabilize before you cut or change anything else. Someone will hopefully advise on whether reinstating to an even higher dose of the mirt would be good, that's not my strength. But please don't change anything else, if you can manage not to. What you need now is time for your CNS to regain homeostasis. Just my opinion, of course, but it's a well-informed opinion.

 

Meanwhile, support your body and mind by basic simple lifestyle tweaks, the kind of thing you'll find a lot of in this forum, stuff like: gentle exercise like gentle walking. Regular routine and schedule. Healthy food, cut the sugar and carbs, best to stay away from caffeine.

 

Exercise is the most powerful depression-buster known. It beats the pants off antidepressants. Light is good, too, both natural and, if you need it, therapy lamp light.

 

There are all kinds of other self-care suggestions here. Please read around as you feel well enough to. Welcome to the forum. I hope you find the community, information and support here that you need.

Started on Prozac and Xanax in 1992 for PTSD after an assault. One drug led to more, the usual story. Got sicker and sicker, but believed I needed the drugs for my "underlying disease". Long story...lost everything. Life savings, home, physical and mental health, relationships, friendships, ability to work, everything. Amitryptiline, Prozac, bupropion, buspirone, flurazepam, diazepam, alprazolam, Paxil, citalopram, lamotrigine, gabapentin...probably more I've forgotten. 

Started multidrug taper in Feb 2010.  Doing a very slow microtaper, down to low doses now and feeling SO much better, getting my old personality and my brain back! Able to work full time, have a full social life, and cope with stress better than ever. Not perfect, but much better. After 23 lost years. Big Pharma has a lot to answer for. And "medicine for profit" is just not a great idea.

 

Feb 15 2010:  300 mg Neurontin  200 Lamictal   10 Celexa      0.65 Xanax   and 5 mg Ambien 

Feb 10 2014:   62 Lamictal    1.1 Celexa         0.135 Xanax    1.8 Valium

Feb 10 2015:   50 Lamictal      0.875 Celexa    0.11 Xanax      1.5 Valium

Feb 15 2016:   47.5 Lamictal   0.75 Celexa      0.0875 Xanax    1.42 Valium    

2/12/20             12                       0.045               0.007                   1 

May 2021            7                       0.01                  0.0037                   1

 

I'm not a doctor. Any advice I give is just my civilian opinion.

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  • Administrator

Justine, I merged your Intro topics. Only one Intro topic to a customer.

 

It looks to me like you and serotonergics, including mirtazapine, Wellbutrin, and SNRIs, do not get along. They are too activating for you. Some people are built this way. If I were you, I would not ever, ever go anywhere near an antidepressant or serotonergic drug (LSD, MDMA, etc.) again.

 

Still, it looks like you have physical dependency on the mirtazapine which caused you to have withdrawal symptoms, and you need to taper off.

 

When you say you are leveling out from the reinstatement of the mirtazapine, what do you mean? What are your symptoms now?

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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