introduction katieb

[katieb]

I am also a pp refugee. Really glad to find this site.Ihave been doing a protracted withdrawl from paroxatine/seroxat from 20mg I am currently down to 3.10mg. I have been on and off (due to being uninformed about wd and thinking I needed to stay on because of feeling so bad after stopping)for approx 15 years .I was put on this poison for a single panic attack in my 20s.Iam going very slow and it will take as long as it takes.

[Tilly]

Hi Katie,

 

Welcome 

 

I was put on paroxetine almost 15 years ago for panic attacks too.

 

I'm now withdrawing from escitalopram very slowly. I'm sure that you'll receive lots of support here.

 

Take good care.

 

Tilly x

[katieb]

Hi.Tilly.How was your wd from paroxatine and how long ago?Did you have a lot of Bizzare symptoms?

[Tilly]

Hi Katie. I cross tapered over to citalopram around 10 years ago. I have had pretty bizarre symptoms from all of the SSRI medications I've been on!

[katieb]

I never know what I am going to wake up to????Good luck with your current taper.

[Tilly]

Same here, Katie. We are on the final stretch of it all. Things will improve. Good luck with your taper too 

[katieb]

Hi all.Quick update.still suffering (3 months now ) with horrible joint and muscle pain and stiffness in shoulders, neck and back.Still on just over 3 ml paroxatine will drop again in 2 weeks .This is the first time I have had real pain in withdrawl and boy am I a wuss.It hurts. Hope it passes.

[ten0275]

katieb, hey.

 

just wanted to let you now i merged your update into your intro thread. we limit one thread per user to the introductions section of the site.

 

sorry you are still suffering as you are. you are not a wuss.

 

hang in there.

 

dave

[Altostrata]

Welcome, katieb.

 

Given you have these withdrawal symptoms, you may want to hold at your current level of paroxetine and not stress your nervous system with a decrease for a while.

 

There's no shame in holding off on a taper -- this may help you deal with the last leg down.

[katieb]

After holding and then last month did my next drop to 1.53 ml I am still in pain in shoulders,neck and back. Terrible muscle aches and feeling bruised.This makes it 4 months now. Has anyone suffered this for so long?

[katieb]

Forgot to say I am taking fish oil and having magnesium naths

[katieb]

* topic moved from symptoms

 

This is starting to get me down.It seems like the last 2 years of my withdrawl have been non stop misery.I am always having symptoms bad enough to interfere with my life.From horrible muscle pain to jaw pains , to nausea to blurred vision to numbness and anesthesia in limbs to tooth pain to head pain etc etc.I never seem to get a break.As soon as one thing goes away up comes another immediately to take its place. Things seem harder to deal with when there is no break in between.
Is this part of the course?
I'm not sur how much more of this I can take.

[a99]

 sorry to hear you're having such a tough time .  

have you been tapering from the drug in those 2 years ? 

[katieb]

Yes I have been slow tapering the past 2 years from 7mg currently at 1.53ml which is just over 3 mg. It's got harder as I get lower.

[Frustrated]

I have constant issues as well and my med was paroxetine. Atm the leg pain is unbearable. I am actually taking percocet and it is still hurting and the muscles are jumping everywhere. Can't even take care of my kids. But when my legs were in a window I had pain elsewhere or dizziness or nausea of headaches etc.... I have so many issues I am sure others think I am a hypochondriac.

[a99]

hang in there , you've come a long way .

I keep reading stories of people with careful tapering , they get sooooo much better after finishing the taper and quitting the drug . It just takes time and patience .

I've been struggling with quitting and I failed many times over the past 4 years , I do feel like I'm never having a break and I've been called hypochondriac countless times but I don't think it's true , I think this whole journey is so overwhelming and stressing , unpredictabale and well known of its never ending list of symptoms .

[katieb]

Thanks for the replies. It is hard with no breaks and relentless symptoms.

Glad that it's not just me and others can identify.Makes me feel a tiny bit better

[JanCarol]

Hey Katie - have you continued to taper?

 

How are you going?

[LexAnger]

Hi Katie,

 

I thought I'm the only one with constant and extreme pain related symptoms and thought lexapro is unique causing that.

I'm now at 3.2mg lex, have exact set of your symptoms plus needling all over, the worst killer, for years but all got so intolerable this round.

 

How are you doing lately?

 

Lex

[katieb]

Hi lex.Not been on the site for a while. Just been trying to push on through.I am currently at 1.4ml or 2.8mg paroxatine. The aches and pains are relentless.Neck , shoulders forearms.It is terribly painful and shows no signs of giving up.It has been over a year now it's quite depressing when it's so hard and fast .I just have to keep telling myself day by day that it will go .I STILL have weakness in my limbs mostly arms and anxiety is worse when I'm on my menstrual cycle when funnily all my sympton seem to ramp up but the pains are the worst.I feel like an old old woman in a 47 year old body.Sometimes I wonder if I have some horrible disease as it never seems to get any better.How are you doing?

[LexAnger]

Hi Katie,l

So sorry for your suffering! I know how torturing those pains are, especially for the long and constant nature of them!

 

I wonder your taper schedule? If you ever had long holds? I feel part of my problem is the lack of long holds. I have been on the same dose since last cut for 12 weeks now and the pain is somewhat lessened either in frequency or intensity in the past couple weeks. This may sounds good news but I'm on a whole new level of disability now as the new symptoms of complete brain nonfunctional/fuzzy/coma like plus extreme fatigue and lagathy made me bedridden all the time. I could push through the day for work and stuff at home with those terrible pains, but have nothing to push without a brain and zero energy. I can't go up dose as I had very bad experience in the past. I never thought I can be hit like this quick at this level with the extream slow taper and careful management. So another big lesson about the danger even with the super slow reduction. I hope you consider the long holds which can cancel the cumulative effects and prevent unseen dangers.

 

For pain, even nothing really helps much, power walk and swim helps a little for me.

 

Lex

[katieb]

Quick update.

Currently at 2.9 mg paroxatine

Have been at this amount for 5 weeks now and for the last 2 weeks my aches and pains seem to have taken a back seat to the brain ,fatigue and horrible dizzyness and unable to focus /concentrate. This is quite a shock as I was not ecpecting it.Has anyone else had this as they got to around this dose?I am doing holds of 8 weeks maybe longer if I feel a bit iffy.

Thanks

[SquirrellyGirl]

Hi Katieb, 

 

Ugh, I'm sorry to hear it has been such a slog!  Would you mind updating your signature to indicate what your starting dose was, if there were prior attempts to come off, and when you have made cuts if you have that info?  It would help everyone to get an idea at a glance.

 

Though the new symptoms are distressing, it is good to hear that the pain is not as bad (or is it that the pain is still bad but the new symptoms outweigh that!?).  It is important to remember that withdrawal symptoms are actually signs that your nervous system is trying to heal, unpleasant as they may be.  The fact that things have changed means another level of healing has taken place.

 

Dizziness is a bad one because it is quite obvious when you are trying to go about your day to day!  So is pain, but I seem to be good at shelving my awareness of pain, bit of a stoic!  I'll take the physical discomforts over the emotional any day, though LOL!

 

Are you doing 10% cuts of your previous dosage?  I find the article on occupancy rates of several SSRIs/SNRIs very helpful in understanding why it gets so much harder the lower the dose you go.  At 20 mg your occupancy rate was about 80%, whereas now you are at about 20%, so that's a lot of receptors you've freed up!  At 5 mg you were at about 40%.  Any cuts from here on out will cause big drops in occupancy, no matter how small.  If you haven't looked at the paper with the graphs, you can see it here:

 

http://ils.unc.edu/bmh/neoref/this.dir.unneeded/schizophrenia/review/tmp/352.pdf

 

I just love this paper because it so elegantly explains why that last part of the taper is so hard and must be done VERY SLOWLY!  Hopefully, it will help you be more patient in the home stretch.  So hard, I know!  But very exciting that you are so close!!

 

SG

[katieb]

Woah! !! This is like being back at the beginning when things were quite bad symptoms are quite debilitating with the wierd dizzyness and brain and feeling like my mouth is moving different to the words I'm speaking.feeling fatigued one minute then hyper the next.AReal strain on my brain and eyes.Im not enjoying this one bit.

I'm not sure how to update my sig but if you yell me I will as soon as I feel better. This is a task and a half trying to write this.I thought I was going as slowly as possible with drops and at 1.7 percent approx every 6 to 8 weeks.

Will look at the paper thanks.

[katieb]

Just read through my post

I meant to say drops are a 1.7 percentage every 6 to 8 weeks.Sorry ...its really hard to concentrate at the moment.I hope this passes soon.

[SquirrellyGirl]

1.7 percent is very small indeed!  You are very sensitized!  I'm sorry you are having such a tough time.  I've been doing fine with my taper but yesterday I was talking on my cell phone and during the call I had a weird perception change in that my phone felt really BIG and heavy!  It was such a strange sensation!  

 

A couple of years ago I had two different incidences of vertigo, where I was nauseous and actually vomited in the shower when I almost hit my head against the wall.  I'd never been one to have this happen before!  I'm now wondering if it had to do with Effexor.  I don't recall if I had done any dosage drops relative to that.  So, I get what you're dealing with.  It sucks!

 

I hope your system settles down; sounds like time for a magnesium bath or something!

 

SG

[brassmonkey]

Hi Katieb--  I'm sorry to hear that you got blindsided like that with your last drop.  The taper plan you've been following is a good one, it's just that you've entered into one of the trickier areas of the paroxetine taper.  I have just gone through that area and know several others who are just entering it and we have all had trouble.  According to the charts this is the area where a tiny change in dose has a huge affect on the nervous system, which is what causes the roughness.  Believe in yourself, your taper and don't panic and you'll be fine.

 

I had a real increase in the cognitive problems here, just like the ones you're describing. They do get better as you go lower but they take a lot to put up with.  They do tend to come and go so you should be getting breaks from them. I found fish oil to be really helpful, particularly with the brain fog.

 

(((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))

[katieb]

Thanks for your replies squirellygirl and brass monkey.

The dizzyness is the worst thing for me ????

Tom thanks for your input, I was beginning to doubt myself ....have I been doing this correctly , have I Essex up dose somehow

[katieb]

Oops .Meant to say have I messed up my dose somehow but no I have dne everything correctly

Just as you say brass I've reached a tricky time in my taper

 

Would you (iny position ) stay for longer at this dose (could just prolong the agony) or just carry on lowering as I have been doing ?

Also wondering why certain lights affect my dizzyness (only way of describing it) any ideas? Dimmer lighting seems take it worse.

Thanks

[katieb]

Oops .Meant to say have I messed up my dose somehow but no I have dne everything correctly

Just as you say brass I've reached a tricky time in my taper

 

Would you (iny position ) stay for longer at this dose (could just prolong the agony) or just carry on lowering as I have been doing ?

Also wondering why certain lights affect my dizzyness (only way of describing it) any ideas? Dimmer lighting seems take it worse.

Thanks

[katieb]

Sorry for the mesed up and double post not much concentration happening here at the moment.Looking forward to a clearer head

[brassmonkey]

I always try to judge it on how I feel the sixth week of my hold.  If I've been gotten back to baseline or WDnormal then I go ahead and drop.  If not I hold another week and reassess. 

 

I think (just my opinion) that some of the dizziness has to do with eyesight and not inner ear balance.  I noticed that when I have dizziness problems my eyes are very sensitive to light and movement and I am tending to have tunnel vision. This is dizziness as in not being able to balance, walking into doorways, "drunken" like behavior as opposed to seeing stars and wanting to fall down.