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Deano32: Medication merry go round/mirtazipine poop out/withdrawal


Deano32

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Thanks again mstimc I will start reading more of the success stories,and I do know what you mean about the gains and setbacks I've noticed I have less tolerance to stressful situations now then I used too and find it hard to contain my emotions especially anger and anxiety,do you think I would be ok to continue with my taper as I haven't decreased in over a year?

2006-2007 20mg fluoxetine - 7mg zopliclone - 2mg diazepam

2007-2008 nothing for 4 months

2008-2009 20mg fluoxetine -citalapram 20mg for a few days - 7mg zopliclone - 2mg diazepam

2009-2010 30mg mirtazipine - 2mg stelazine took only twice - 25mg amatriptiline added for two months then stopped

2010-2015 30mg mirtazipine

2015-2016 went up to 45mg mirtazipine in May until September then decreased to 37.5mg for roughly six weeks then down to 30 mg for roughly six weeks then down to 22.5mg of mirtazipine which I am currently on.

2016-2018 slowly got down to 3.75mg mirtazipine

2018-2019 slowly got down to 2mg of mirtazipine

2019- october-crashed

2020-january updose to 3mg settled again

2020-june crashed again severe withdrawals

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  • Mentor
23 minutes ago, Deano32 said:

do you think I would be ok to continue with my taper as I haven't decreased in over a year?

Hi

 

Tapering isnt my area of expertise so I'll let others more knowledgeable chime in on that.  I will say, for me, once I committed to a taper (after two unsuccessful attempts), I stuck with it, but I did vary the interval somewhat depending on how I felt.  I had to accept it wasn't a race so I allowed myself time to adapt and heal between decreases.  I really think each of us has to make the decision on when to decrease based on how we feel, and not be too rigid with a schedule.  

Tim C

Started Paxil for GAD in 1999

Unsuccessful taper attempt in 2006

Paxilprogress helped with a successful taper completed in 2009

Using therapy and CBT to manage my anxiety

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  • 2 years later...

Hi im back with an update been on about 4.5mg of mirtazipine for a while been up and down but coped ok.,just had a bout of the flu was ok at first but now am not doing good i have been having

 

.cold flashes leading to panic attacks which i havent had on this scale for years

 

.dry mouth not helped by water

 

.intrusive thoughts

 

.genral anxiety allday cant relax

 

I was wondering if anyone had anything like this happen after having the flu?as everything that i had before now feels 10 times worse making me nearly unfunctionanble.

2006-2007 20mg fluoxetine - 7mg zopliclone - 2mg diazepam

2007-2008 nothing for 4 months

2008-2009 20mg fluoxetine -citalapram 20mg for a few days - 7mg zopliclone - 2mg diazepam

2009-2010 30mg mirtazipine - 2mg stelazine took only twice - 25mg amatriptiline added for two months then stopped

2010-2015 30mg mirtazipine

2015-2016 went up to 45mg mirtazipine in May until September then decreased to 37.5mg for roughly six weeks then down to 30 mg for roughly six weeks then down to 22.5mg of mirtazipine which I am currently on.

2016-2018 slowly got down to 3.75mg mirtazipine

2018-2019 slowly got down to 2mg of mirtazipine

2019- october-crashed

2020-january updose to 3mg settled again

2020-june crashed again severe withdrawals

Link to comment

Update- day 2 since symptoms began

 

Still feeling awful today managed to get zero sleep last night.

Today symptoms are the same plus have lost my emotions so feeling very flat

 

Do i just wait this out? or taper/updose i know its only been a couple of days of symptoms but i seem to be going downhill fast

 

2006-2007 20mg fluoxetine - 7mg zopliclone - 2mg diazepam

2007-2008 nothing for 4 months

2008-2009 20mg fluoxetine -citalapram 20mg for a few days - 7mg zopliclone - 2mg diazepam

2009-2010 30mg mirtazipine - 2mg stelazine took only twice - 25mg amatriptiline added for two months then stopped

2010-2015 30mg mirtazipine

2015-2016 went up to 45mg mirtazipine in May until September then decreased to 37.5mg for roughly six weeks then down to 30 mg for roughly six weeks then down to 22.5mg of mirtazipine which I am currently on.

2016-2018 slowly got down to 3.75mg mirtazipine

2018-2019 slowly got down to 2mg of mirtazipine

2019- october-crashed

2020-january updose to 3mg settled again

2020-june crashed again severe withdrawals

Link to comment
  • Mentor

Hi Deano

Be patient with yourself.  Two days is way too soon to make a reinstatement decision. Tapering isn't a smooth decline--its a rollercoaster of ups and downs, but you can handle it, especially if you stay focused on recovery.  Try to use distraction and reality grounding to crowd out the intrusive thinking.  Its the anxious thoughts that are trying to convince you that you can't make it.  Don't give them that power. 

Tim C

Started Paxil for GAD in 1999

Unsuccessful taper attempt in 2006

Paxilprogress helped with a successful taper completed in 2009

Using therapy and CBT to manage my anxiety

Link to comment

Thanks for the reply mstimc

 

Been a really hard couple of days for me. seems since having the flu ive kind of lost my resilience to cope as well and with the uptick in symptoms its been very hard i even cried today for the first time in years as feeling so overwhelmed 

2006-2007 20mg fluoxetine - 7mg zopliclone - 2mg diazepam

2007-2008 nothing for 4 months

2008-2009 20mg fluoxetine -citalapram 20mg for a few days - 7mg zopliclone - 2mg diazepam

2009-2010 30mg mirtazipine - 2mg stelazine took only twice - 25mg amatriptiline added for two months then stopped

2010-2015 30mg mirtazipine

2015-2016 went up to 45mg mirtazipine in May until September then decreased to 37.5mg for roughly six weeks then down to 30 mg for roughly six weeks then down to 22.5mg of mirtazipine which I am currently on.

2016-2018 slowly got down to 3.75mg mirtazipine

2018-2019 slowly got down to 2mg of mirtazipine

2019- october-crashed

2020-january updose to 3mg settled again

2020-june crashed again severe withdrawals

Link to comment
  • Mentor
3 minutes ago, Deano32 said:

i even cried today for the first time in years as feeling so overwhelmed 

 

I know this might feel unpleasant, but being able to release emotions through tears sounds pretty darn healthy. Especially if it's the first time in years! Gotta let that water flow. 

Pronouns: they/them/theirs 

Started on Prozac in early 2000s to treat cPTSD, been on various cocktails ever since.

2002-2004, 2017-2022: Buspar, tapered down to 0

2016-present: 100mg Seroquel for sleep -> May 2023: 90mg -> June 2023: 81mg -> September 2023: 72mg -> switched to brand name, much too strong, down to 60mg -> October 2023: 54mg -> November 2023: 50mg -> January 2024: 45mg -> April 2024: 40.5mg

2016-Present: 100mg Wellbutrin SR -> January 2023: 75mg IR (37.5mg 2x a day) -> February 2023 (33.75mg 2x a day) -> July 2023 (30.37mg 2x a day) -> August 2023: 27.33mg 2x a day 

2018-present: 25mg Pristiq

2015-present: 600mg Gabapentin (200mg 3x a day) -> December 2022: 300mg Gabapentin (100mg 3x a day) per GP's recommendation after side effects -> March 2023: 90mg 3x a day (switched to liquid suspension) -> April 2023: 81mg 3x a day -> September 2023: bad generic, switched back to homemade liquid; too strong after bad generic, down to 70mg 3x a day, still bad. Adjusted slowly till at 60mg 3x a day, much better. Long hold till -> December 2023: 54mg, still feels too high after November Seroquel switch from brand name to generic, doc recommended 50mg which feels better -> January 2024: When Wellbutrin went down, Gabapentin started putting me to sleep, went down to 45mg, then 41mg to stay awake, so far so good -> February 2024: 36mg, still too high, 34mg -> March 2024: 31mg, STILL too high, 30mg

Supplements: Multivitamin w/magnesium, probiotics, digestive enzymes, anti-viral nitric oxide nose spray as needed

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  • Mentor

@littlebirdbeat me to it, but crying can be good.  Its a sign your emotions are coming back. They aren't being stifled by the meds. And its a great emotional release.  This is a sign of healing!

Tim C

Started Paxil for GAD in 1999

Unsuccessful taper attempt in 2006

Paxilprogress helped with a successful taper completed in 2009

Using therapy and CBT to manage my anxiety

Link to comment

Thank you both  i really hope so.so unusual for me to cry and made me feel like im losing control just not used to it 

2006-2007 20mg fluoxetine - 7mg zopliclone - 2mg diazepam

2007-2008 nothing for 4 months

2008-2009 20mg fluoxetine -citalapram 20mg for a few days - 7mg zopliclone - 2mg diazepam

2009-2010 30mg mirtazipine - 2mg stelazine took only twice - 25mg amatriptiline added for two months then stopped

2010-2015 30mg mirtazipine

2015-2016 went up to 45mg mirtazipine in May until September then decreased to 37.5mg for roughly six weeks then down to 30 mg for roughly six weeks then down to 22.5mg of mirtazipine which I am currently on.

2016-2018 slowly got down to 3.75mg mirtazipine

2018-2019 slowly got down to 2mg of mirtazipine

2019- october-crashed

2020-january updose to 3mg settled again

2020-june crashed again severe withdrawals

Link to comment
  • Mentor
3 minutes ago, Deano32 said:

so unusual for me to cry and made me feel like im losing control just not used to it 

 

Oh, it feels weird and sometimes awful when the tears flow. I found I had a flood of 'em after not crying for a long time, but then that eased as my body adjusted to tapering. I used to fight the tears, they make me feel out of control too, but I found when I just gave in to them it was often less crying than I thought was going to come and I felt better afterwards. Can help to journal a bit too while crying to really get those feelings out!

Pronouns: they/them/theirs 

Started on Prozac in early 2000s to treat cPTSD, been on various cocktails ever since.

2002-2004, 2017-2022: Buspar, tapered down to 0

2016-present: 100mg Seroquel for sleep -> May 2023: 90mg -> June 2023: 81mg -> September 2023: 72mg -> switched to brand name, much too strong, down to 60mg -> October 2023: 54mg -> November 2023: 50mg -> January 2024: 45mg -> April 2024: 40.5mg

2016-Present: 100mg Wellbutrin SR -> January 2023: 75mg IR (37.5mg 2x a day) -> February 2023 (33.75mg 2x a day) -> July 2023 (30.37mg 2x a day) -> August 2023: 27.33mg 2x a day 

2018-present: 25mg Pristiq

2015-present: 600mg Gabapentin (200mg 3x a day) -> December 2022: 300mg Gabapentin (100mg 3x a day) per GP's recommendation after side effects -> March 2023: 90mg 3x a day (switched to liquid suspension) -> April 2023: 81mg 3x a day -> September 2023: bad generic, switched back to homemade liquid; too strong after bad generic, down to 70mg 3x a day, still bad. Adjusted slowly till at 60mg 3x a day, much better. Long hold till -> December 2023: 54mg, still feels too high after November Seroquel switch from brand name to generic, doc recommended 50mg which feels better -> January 2024: When Wellbutrin went down, Gabapentin started putting me to sleep, went down to 45mg, then 41mg to stay awake, so far so good -> February 2024: 36mg, still too high, 34mg -> March 2024: 31mg, STILL too high, 30mg

Supplements: Multivitamin w/magnesium, probiotics, digestive enzymes, anti-viral nitric oxide nose spray as needed

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i did feel a little calmer after and il give the journaling a try thanks littlebird

2006-2007 20mg fluoxetine - 7mg zopliclone - 2mg diazepam

2007-2008 nothing for 4 months

2008-2009 20mg fluoxetine -citalapram 20mg for a few days - 7mg zopliclone - 2mg diazepam

2009-2010 30mg mirtazipine - 2mg stelazine took only twice - 25mg amatriptiline added for two months then stopped

2010-2015 30mg mirtazipine

2015-2016 went up to 45mg mirtazipine in May until September then decreased to 37.5mg for roughly six weeks then down to 30 mg for roughly six weeks then down to 22.5mg of mirtazipine which I am currently on.

2016-2018 slowly got down to 3.75mg mirtazipine

2018-2019 slowly got down to 2mg of mirtazipine

2019- october-crashed

2020-january updose to 3mg settled again

2020-june crashed again severe withdrawals

Link to comment

Update- day 3 

 

I slept last night but woke up early had to get out of bed as burning skin and anxiety.

Feel slightly dazed and depressed today not really knowing what to do with myself just stuck in my own head trying to figure out how to get myself out of this situation,i was doing okish until i got the flu will this all settle down if i do nothing?as feel so depressed today 

2006-2007 20mg fluoxetine - 7mg zopliclone - 2mg diazepam

2007-2008 nothing for 4 months

2008-2009 20mg fluoxetine -citalapram 20mg for a few days - 7mg zopliclone - 2mg diazepam

2009-2010 30mg mirtazipine - 2mg stelazine took only twice - 25mg amatriptiline added for two months then stopped

2010-2015 30mg mirtazipine

2015-2016 went up to 45mg mirtazipine in May until September then decreased to 37.5mg for roughly six weeks then down to 30 mg for roughly six weeks then down to 22.5mg of mirtazipine which I am currently on.

2016-2018 slowly got down to 3.75mg mirtazipine

2018-2019 slowly got down to 2mg of mirtazipine

2019- october-crashed

2020-january updose to 3mg settled again

2020-june crashed again severe withdrawals

Link to comment

Hi Deano. I have had these setbacks when I get sick from the flu, bad colds and covid during my Mirt taper. Symptoms get worse and it can be hard. I have to tell you, every time this has happened I have stabilized. It's happened to me quite a few times. The flu caused the wave of symptoms. I would just stay at your dose until you stabilize since it seems you have been at this dose for a while. Marie.

10/13--10/14 Ambien. Started tapering 1/14  Jumped 10/14.  Done.                                                                              

3/14        7.5 Remeron  still taking this.                              

2/14         75 Trazodone   -    Tapered by dry cutting all the way down.

1/16        4 mg Trazodone  -  Jumped. Bad mistake. Got hit with late withdrawal 6 weeks later. Reinstated.

4/16        Reinstated 1 mg, updose to 2 mg Trazodone

2/19        .04 Trazodone. Walked off.  Done.

10/3/19  Started 7.5 Mirtazapine taper cut to .073 gram weight, pill weighs .076

4/5/20    New Mirtazapine Taper - Compound Liquid 7.35 mg April '20, 7.25 mg May, 7.05 mg June, 6.99 mg June, 6.78 mg July, 6.57 mg Aug, Sept 6.35 mg, Sept 6.24 mg, Sept 6.21 mg, Oct 5.99 mg, Oct 5.90 mg, Oct 5.70 mg.

1/11/21 6.05 mg Messed up taper due to syringe change. Must remember the 1 ml syringe contains 1.5mg! 1/16/21 5.99 mg

2/21 5.75 mg, 3/21 5.6 mg, 4/7 5.45, 4/14 5.30, 5/12 5.15, 5/25/21 4.99 mg, 6/29 4.87 mg, 7/14/21 4.74 mg, 8/5 4.62 mg 8/17 4.5 mg, 8/30 4.38 mg,9/16 4.26 mg,10/9 4.14 mg, 10/23 4.05 mg, 11/6 3.96 mg,11/17 3.87mg.***Jan 22 Liquid was changed/couldn't tolerate***Changed back to pills. Feb 22/3.9 mg, 2/17/22 3.8 mg, 3/23 3.7 mg, 4/7 3.6 mg, 5/10 3.5mg,6/10/22 3.4 mg, 7/4 3.3 mg, 7/25 3.2 mg, 8/20/22 3.1 mg, 9/15 3 mg, 10/8/22 2.9 mg., 12/15 2.8 mg, 1/6/23 2.7 mg, 2/16/23 2.6 mg, 3/9 2.5 mg, 4/4 2.4 mg, 4/29/23 2.3 mg, 5/26 2.2 mg, 6/22/23 2.1 mg, 10/14 2 mg, 11/12 1.9 mg, 11/28 1.8 mg ,12/14/23 1.7, 12/31/23 1.6 mg, 1/20 1.5 mg, 2/6/24 1.4 mg, 2/12 updose 1.5 mg, 3/27/24 1.4 mg,5/31/24 l.2 mg. Taking multi-vitamin, vit. D, cholestoff, psyllium husk, and fish oil.

 

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Thanks marie123 needed to hear that

 

2006-2007 20mg fluoxetine - 7mg zopliclone - 2mg diazepam

2007-2008 nothing for 4 months

2008-2009 20mg fluoxetine -citalapram 20mg for a few days - 7mg zopliclone - 2mg diazepam

2009-2010 30mg mirtazipine - 2mg stelazine took only twice - 25mg amatriptiline added for two months then stopped

2010-2015 30mg mirtazipine

2015-2016 went up to 45mg mirtazipine in May until September then decreased to 37.5mg for roughly six weeks then down to 30 mg for roughly six weeks then down to 22.5mg of mirtazipine which I am currently on.

2016-2018 slowly got down to 3.75mg mirtazipine

2018-2019 slowly got down to 2mg of mirtazipine

2019- october-crashed

2020-january updose to 3mg settled again

2020-june crashed again severe withdrawals

Link to comment

Update- day 5 

 

Still lots of symptoms persist

.racing thoughts

.numb head

.panic and depression

.not hungry stomach seems shut off

 

Am noticing a patern forming too seem to be at my worse in the morning and through day and improve alot at night been this way for the last 3 days

2006-2007 20mg fluoxetine - 7mg zopliclone - 2mg diazepam

2007-2008 nothing for 4 months

2008-2009 20mg fluoxetine -citalapram 20mg for a few days - 7mg zopliclone - 2mg diazepam

2009-2010 30mg mirtazipine - 2mg stelazine took only twice - 25mg amatriptiline added for two months then stopped

2010-2015 30mg mirtazipine

2015-2016 went up to 45mg mirtazipine in May until September then decreased to 37.5mg for roughly six weeks then down to 30 mg for roughly six weeks then down to 22.5mg of mirtazipine which I am currently on.

2016-2018 slowly got down to 3.75mg mirtazipine

2018-2019 slowly got down to 2mg of mirtazipine

2019- october-crashed

2020-january updose to 3mg settled again

2020-june crashed again severe withdrawals

Link to comment
  • Mentor

Hi Deano

 

I know WD is hell, but you should practice denying your symptoms so much of your emotional and intellectual energy.  When I was deep in WD, I'd wake up and catalog everything wrong with me, and if I couldn't find anything, my anxious mind would start searching until it created something or blew minor things into major issues.  There is such a strong urge to pull the covers over your head and hibernate until it passes, but that's the worse thing you can do.  It just creates mind space for more more symptoms and intrusive thoughts. I'm in no way trying to minimize your symptoms, but the mind can have a powerful effect on the body.  Racing and anxious thoughts tighten your entire body, which would explain feeling numb and your stomach problems.

 

Practicing acceptance is one of the most difficult coping tools, but it is very powerful.  Thoughts have no substance and no power other than what we give them.  Accept the racing thoughts will come, but you don't have to react to them. They're like hiccups--they're annoying but they don't last forever and they don't mean something is wrong with you.  There are lots of acceptance practice sources, but I and and many other SA members found Claire Weeks' "floating through" approach to be effective.  You should check that out when you have a chance. And remember, we've been there--you're not alone!

Tim C

Started Paxil for GAD in 1999

Unsuccessful taper attempt in 2006

Paxilprogress helped with a successful taper completed in 2009

Using therapy and CBT to manage my anxiety

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Thanks mstimc

 

ive been walking alot today trying to keep busy and making myself eat even though my stomach doesnt want too ive even self reffered myself to do some possible cbt or talk therapy,

I never thought id get to this stage again.

I will look in to that book and will really try and be more accepting its really hard though

2006-2007 20mg fluoxetine - 7mg zopliclone - 2mg diazepam

2007-2008 nothing for 4 months

2008-2009 20mg fluoxetine -citalapram 20mg for a few days - 7mg zopliclone - 2mg diazepam

2009-2010 30mg mirtazipine - 2mg stelazine took only twice - 25mg amatriptiline added for two months then stopped

2010-2015 30mg mirtazipine

2015-2016 went up to 45mg mirtazipine in May until September then decreased to 37.5mg for roughly six weeks then down to 30 mg for roughly six weeks then down to 22.5mg of mirtazipine which I am currently on.

2016-2018 slowly got down to 3.75mg mirtazipine

2018-2019 slowly got down to 2mg of mirtazipine

2019- october-crashed

2020-january updose to 3mg settled again

2020-june crashed again severe withdrawals

Link to comment
  • Mentor

Be kind to yourself.  This isn't a race or a pass/fail test.  Each day can have its own small victories. 

Tim C

Started Paxil for GAD in 1999

Unsuccessful taper attempt in 2006

Paxilprogress helped with a successful taper completed in 2009

Using therapy and CBT to manage my anxiety

Link to comment

Thanks again mstimc i will try

2006-2007 20mg fluoxetine - 7mg zopliclone - 2mg diazepam

2007-2008 nothing for 4 months

2008-2009 20mg fluoxetine -citalapram 20mg for a few days - 7mg zopliclone - 2mg diazepam

2009-2010 30mg mirtazipine - 2mg stelazine took only twice - 25mg amatriptiline added for two months then stopped

2010-2015 30mg mirtazipine

2015-2016 went up to 45mg mirtazipine in May until September then decreased to 37.5mg for roughly six weeks then down to 30 mg for roughly six weeks then down to 22.5mg of mirtazipine which I am currently on.

2016-2018 slowly got down to 3.75mg mirtazipine

2018-2019 slowly got down to 2mg of mirtazipine

2019- october-crashed

2020-january updose to 3mg settled again

2020-june crashed again severe withdrawals

Link to comment
  • 1 year later...

@Deano32 Hi, just wanted to say I can relate to how hard this is. Also do not understand how it’s possible these drugs can cause all these inhumane symptoms. Hope we heal and get some relief 🌿

2008 Zoloft 50mg 

2022 May - 62,5mg (doctor wanted to increase). Felt sick, went back to 50mg efter 2 weeks

2022 Oct - Reducing dose to 37,5mg (from 50mg). WD in few days, advised to go back to 50 - I then got adverse worse paradoxical effect

2022 Oct - Zoloft 50mg adverse reaction

2023 May 5th - Reducing dose to 25mg (directly from 50mg by Dr, WD).

2023 Aug 1st - Reducing dose to 12,5mg 

2023 Oct 10th - Removed dose from 12mg to zero by Dr. Reinstated 2,5mg citalopram after 3 months, bad reaction. Reinstated 0,5mg zoloft for 6 days after 7 months, didn’t work. In terrible WD.

 

 

 


 

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