Rocky: Paxil withdrawal?

[Rocky]

Hi  everyone!

I am new here and I am hoping to find here some advices in how to recover from withdrawal symptoms. When I started to read on this forum it became more obvious for me that my symptoms are withdrawal symptoms but I am also doubting it cuz I don't really have a large medical history as some of you. Of 1 thing I am sure and that is that these symptoms started from the moment I stopped taking Paxil. In 2011 I took Citalopram 10 mg for almost 15 months and then went off it without any problems. Then in december 2014 my life got hard and I started to get panic attacks and anxiety so my doctor gave me the advice to take Paxil on low dose (10mg). As recommended I took this dose for at least 3,5 months to see if it was gonna work for me. Very soon I noticed Paxil was some other AD then the citalopram I had before. I had headache, problems with my stomach and was very irritated and angry without any reason. So on advice of my doctor I had to taper off Paxil in 1 month.I thought this was to fast so I took steps by 2,5 mg over 2 months. Reducing dose didn't gave much problems but when I stopped taking Paxil (2,5 mg - 0) I felt terrible. It made sence of course so I waited for 3/4 weeks but these symptoms didn't go away.At that time i didn't know anything about this withdrawal syndrome and I sure didn't want to take Paxil again so I was motivated to stay clean and wait for these symptoms to disappear. Now 9 months later I am still dealing with these symtomps that are ruining my life. I will try to describe some of them;

Physical:  stabbing pain in the back of my head (nerve system), tensed up head and jaw muscles, pressure in forhead and nose, tingling feeling in head and face, incredibly tired, slow breathing (that scares me) and some blured vision in my eyes.

Then I have a lot mental problems aswell like complete numbness, my anxiety and every other emotion is gone, i can't get a panic attack even if I wanted to cuz I feel really down, slow and tired, I feel like I am in dream all day every day (what could be Depersonalisation/Derealisation), I got thinking problems (thoughs go real slow, get stuck, thoughtless for long moments) and its hard to follow conversations or concentrate etc.

I have seen some doctors for these symptoms but everything seems to be fine by them. The bloodtest was ok, the neurologic test was ok and even the MRI scan of my head was ok. So they don't know what I am dealing with but do advice to start antidepressants again. I am not sure if it's smart to take AD again. I really want to get rid of these symptoms that I am dealing with for almost a year now but what if AD makes it worse. And what kind of AD should it take then? For now I am still trying to recover with 1500 mg Fishoil a day, Vitamin E, Methyl B12 and magnesium from to to time. Besides that I walk 4/5 miles twice a week to activate my body and not stay in bed all day. I am a bit scared to do a real workout cuz of these symptoms but i wonder if that would help recovering faster.

 

Sometimes I doubt myself if I ain't dealing with a psychosis or a starting psychosis cuz of all these negative symptoms as thinking problems, knowing your awake but feeling like your not really awake and total loss of emtions. But on the other hand I know this all started after the last pill of Paxil, I can't find anything about these physical symptoms in a psychosis and I don't hallucinate or anything. Maybe it's just a stupid worry if have in this current situation

 

I know you guys aint doctors but does anyone know if this is a withdrawal syndrome I am dealing with? I't's crazy that only 5/6 months on Paxil gives so much problems for already 9 months. And will this get any better cuz I am losing a bit of hope. Hope to hear from you.

Greetz, Justin

[AliG]

Hi Justin. Welcome. It sounds like you are in  withdrawal . Could you please add your drug history signature ?

 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/893-please-put-your-withdrawal-history-in-your-signature/

 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/603-what-is-withdrawal-syndrome/

 

This will help to understand your history and to give advice. This is your thread to ask questions and keep track of your progress. Please come back with any questions and concerns.

[clearday]

 When I started to read on this forum it became more obvious for me that my symptoms are withdrawal symptoms but I am also doubting it cuz I don't really have a large medical history as some of you. 

 

Hi,

 

Sorry to hear that you are suffering these symptoms.

 

It sure sounds like withdrawal from Paxil.

 

Your package of symptoms are all very typical of SSRI withdrawal. And the fact that they hit you right after stopping Paxil indicates very strongly that Paxil is the cause. It is very common to read stories of people who think they have some strange neurological disorder, conduct all these tests, and finally realize, yes, it is the SSRI that caused these symptoms. It becomes pretty obvious. That's also what happened to me.

 

Like you, I don't have a large medical history, in fact I have always been very healthy and live an active lifestyle. I run three miles a few times per week, I ski and snowboard, hiking, sports etc. 

 

But these SSRIs took me down; first Prozac, then Lexapro.

 

Many other healthy people have been seriously harmed solely by the use of SSRIs such as Paxil, these are all very powerful drugs.

 

Like you, sometimes a person can be on one of these drugs before and come off ok. But when they try another, all of sudden it all goes bad. Very common. Even psychiatrists admit that Paxil is a particulary nasty drug. It's been around a long time, it is long established to cause severe withdrawal. Lexapro is relatively new, but it is now obvious that Lexapro is also just as nasty as Paxil when it comes to withdrawal. At the end of the day, we now know that ALL these SSRIs can may cause severe withdrawal.

 

All things considered, exercise will not speed up your recovery; we have found that only TIME helps recovery.

 

I exercise regularly, and live a healthy lifestyle, but for me, the symptoms of protracted SSRI withdrawal have a life of their own.

 

For some people, exercise may trigger withdrawal symptoms. The whole nervous system is now also sensitive to certain triggers like substances such as caffeine and alcohol. Stress, such as traveling, often triggers a wave of withdrawal symptoms.

 

It is good that you haven't been on Paxil for many years, the less time on these SSRIs, the better. 

 

Magnesium and fish oil may help some of your symptoms. They help some people; for others, they do not.

 

Taking care of yourself by eating healthy foods, avoiding unnecessary stress, will promote healing.

[Rocky]

Hi Justin. Welcome. It sounds like you are in  withdrawal . Could you please add your drug history signature ?

 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/893-please-put-your-withdrawal-history-in-your-signature/

 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/603-what-is-withdrawal-syndrome/

 

This will help to understand your history and to give advice. This is your thread to ask questions and keep track of your progress. Please come back with any questions and concerns.

@ AliG I think I fixed the signature. Thnx for your comment

 

@ Clearday thnx for your reply. It's a bit of a relief to read that my symptoms belong to the SSRI withdrawal. I was sure of it for 80/90% cuz of the fact that these symptoms came up as I stopped taking Paxil. Only when I started searching for explanations of these symptoms, sites of psychosis came up. Many of these symptoms are the same symptoms of a starting psychosis so that scared me a bit. And when it is a psychosis you have to handle fast to prevent more damage they say. Anyway when I red about this withdrawal syndrom things made more sence for me.

 

Sad to hear about your own struggle with SSRI withdrawal. I still can't believe there is no help for situations like this and doctors refuse to listen to these experiences. In my last visit to a psychiatrist (some months ago) I asked her if she knew about nerve damage cuz of SSRI but she refused to admit it. Only new SSRI could help me out she said. So I was finished talking to her and made my own plan to recover.

 

The reason I asked for exercise is that I have red an article (in dutch) that exercise stimulates the production of new nerve cells. So therefore I thought it may be helpful to recover faster. In my experience, just walking some miles, trigger my withdrawal symptoms just as you say it. After this walk I have to lay down for some hours. Very frustrating cuz it's hard for me to listen to my body and take some rest when needed.

 

I hope this will recover with the supplements I am taking. My life really is on hold at the moment and I am only 27. I can't work and I don't have a diagnose or doctor behind me that can confirm  my sickness at the moment so more trouble is upcomming financially and for my career of course. When did anyone of you get a bit of health back?

[clearday]

 When did anyone of you get a bit of health back?

 

Recovery and symptoms varies greatly between individuals. 

 

Some people get better within a few months and don't wind up in protracted withdrawal.

 

But most people on here have been hit with protracted withdrawal, lasting for months and years.

 

Some symptoms clear up within the first year or two of protracted withdrawal.

 

But other symptoms may persist for a few years. It varies greatly between people, but I will try to give an overview:

 

People in protracted WD often struggle for the first year or two, and perhaps during the third and fourth years, see some real improvements in those symptoms that are very persistent for them. Again, it is hard to generalize, and everyone is different.

 

The pattern of recovery usually happens in "waves" (periods of worsening of symptoms, or morphing/appearance of new symptoms) and "windows" (periods of much reduced symptoms, feelings of near-normalcy). So the healing pattern is not "linear", and is very confusing and disheartening when waves return after a nice window. For some people, they have no real windows for a long time, then all of sudden feel much better out of the blue, and make good progress toward eventual recovery.

 

I have been through this twice, and each time was very different. After the acute Prozac withdrawal which consisted of two months of dysautonomia, I had protracted withdrawal consisting of chronic fatigue and brain fog for years, with no real waves or windows. I got mostly better from that within four/five years. Never even knew it was Prozac WD, thought I had some stress related illness. Totally mismanaged my recovery, since I didn't even know what was wrong with me. Probably would have healed quicker if my doctor recognized that I was severely damaged by the Prozac he had put me on. He was totally clueless.

 

So unfortunately, after being all healed from protracted Prozac WD, years later I went on Lexapro for mild dysthymia. Coming off that, two years ago, has been much more difficult and unpredictable than the Prozac WD. But I have healed a lot over the last two years of Lexapro WD. I just have a couple symptoms that persist, but they are showing signs of healing also. Now that I know how incredibly damaging these drugs are, I don't plan on ever going back on them again. I am mostly my same old self intellectually and emotionally, and I have no clinical depression or anxiety. I should never have been anywhere near these drugs in the first place. 

[Rocky]

@ clearday  thnx again for your description on this withdrawal syndrom and sharing your own experience. I can imagine you never want to get back on these meds ever again.

 

I still have some questions left if anyone is willing to help me. I am now in my 10th month being of Paxil and I am really struggeling at this point in my withdrawal. Days are getting really hard to go through. It feels like the struggle is getting harder and harder.

 

I have been numb since I came of Paxil (wich I took for panicattacks) and had physical symptoms right from the beginning aswell. Last week I felt some kind of anxiety signals going through my body. It was only just for a second and I thought this is a sign of improvement. Maybe it is.. but these signals and moments of axienty are getting back more and more. Now almost 2 weeks later I have them coming back almost daily and more frequently. It makes life a bit harder at this point. The numbness (that’s partly still there) is terrible but having all symptoms along with axienty is even harder. In this numbness condition I had worries but I was just like I don’t care. These thoughts didn’t bring on any axienty and now the they do from time to time. Its hard to deal with this feeling after being a zombie for 9,5 months. And I wonder if it’s because my feelings are coming back or it’s those neuro-emotions. It’s a a bad feeling in my stomach and it’s like my chest is burning. I want to keep calm and accept the feeling but boy oh boy. I think I am really gonna need some mindfullness or other tricks to get through this. I even thought of taking a benzo or just a bit of it to get myself calm but I don’t dare to take it in this condition and I am a bit scared of an adverse reaction.

 

On the other hand it does make me feel a bit more alive then a while ago. I can react with axienty to a worrisome thought (with moments). I can remember the thoughts I had before I fall asleep and falling asleep is getting harder where I before just fell asleep and forgot about everything. I even noticed that my deperzonalisation reduced for just a bit and some allong with my physical symptoms like the stabbing pain in the back of my head. It’s less frequently there and for shorter moments. I got a bit more energy. There are some other slight improvements to but it goes really really slow. But you could say that after 10 months there some improvements/changes.

It’s just that there are some really terrible symptoms (except from the axienty) that I find hard to deal with. These cognitive problems where my thoughts go very slow every minute of the day together with my speech problems are horrible. My tongue feels different, don’t know how to describe it. And this apathy, lack of motivation and interessed which normaly is not a part of me. I know I would have had at least one panicattack about these symptoms but I can’t get myself in that “fight or flight” state. My body and head just react to slow..  

And the tensed up muscles in my body are scarring me sometimes. Like I want to walk but I am nailed to the ground. I get it done but it feels like I am stuck.  Anyway these symptoms made me think of MS. When I go through the symptoms of MS I got almost all of them but I know this all started after stopping Paxil so it must be the withdrawal. Or withdrawal can cause MS but then again my MRI was fine in October. And I guess I won’t be the first here thinking of MS in this condition..

 

These are just the symptoms that make me hopeless and make me wonder how I am gonna make through another day. That is why I still consider RI but I am off drugs now for 10 months so I don’t know if it’s a good idea. I red that Fluoxetine can help in withdrawal but I want to get rid of that drug to someday and then I have to start all over again? I have seen some doctors now and not one of them has a clue. It’s a depression they say and a depression can cause inexplicable symptoms so end of story.

 

Maybe someone has an advice in how to cope with these symptoms I described. Maybe some supplements that can help me out instead of ri or taking a benzo?

I apologize for my English. It’s not my first language and in this condition it’s kinda hard to write in English. I am glad that I found this site so I know I am not alone in this. Thnx  

 

Greetz, Justin

 

[Ali4]

I have all of your head symptoms, brain zaps, numbness,tingling, pain all of it. I had been on celexa 10 years and my doc tapered me down from 30mg too nothing over a month, telling me I would be fine, 2 weeks after stopping all hell broke out, I reinstated a small dose at 3 weeks being off, immediately felt relief, the only symptom left is the head symptoms. You have been off meds for 10 months, reinstating is most likely not going to help you at this point, some have had sucess this far out, but most don't, you would be taking a huge risk, if you read the link of reinstating you will get a better understanding. Welcome to SA I'm sure a mod will be by shortly to give you some help, just wanted to share my story so you know your not alone. Take care all the best Ali.

[Rocky]

@ Ali. Thnx for sharing your story. I guess you are right about ri in the 10th month. It's just these terrible symptoms are getting harder to deal with and only the thought of having to deal with it for another year is killing me. Have you found any ways to cope with this cognitive problems and being so tired all the time?

 

Is there anyone who has some advice for me in this situation? I see a psychiatrist again tomorrow but already know that's not gonna help me out. Just one last try to see what she thinks.  

[Ali4]

I just go day by day and tell myself that it will get better, I know it's not easy, but there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Some people have had success reinstating after a long period of time, it is a risk, but you may be someone it works for, just don't know for sure, it would be a crap shoot for sure. My psychiatrist would always just try and push more drugs on me, not sure what yours is like, but I dropped mine and don't see him anymore. Are you taking any supplements? People report that magnesium and fish oil help, read around the site on people who have had success at reinstatement far out, that will help you, also read self care, lots of good info in there. Take care Ali

[Rocky]

I think ri is a big risk at this point to so I probably I won't do it. I am just gonna ask my psychiatrist some question. Tell her most of my symptoms and see what she thinks it could be. Possibly I'll be diagnosed with a depression. They just don't want to know anything about withdrawal. But we'll see..

 

These are the supplements and medication I am taking currently:

- 08.30 am  1x 10mg propranolol, 1x 1100 mg fish oil (764mg EPA/ 236 mg DHA), 1x vitamin E 500iu

- 10.30 am  1x  Methyl B12

- 06.00 pm  1x 10mg propranolol, 1x 1100 mg fish oil (764mg EPA/ 236 mg DHA)

- 09.00 om  1x  450mg (half tablet) magnesium Metarelax

 

I am taking the propranolol for some years already cuz of a side effect of my IBS, strong heartbeats after a meal. These other supplements am I taking for 2 months now and I don't find any problems taking them. I only wonder if maybe some more magnesium could help me out with my muscle stiffness and the IBS symptoms that got worse after Paxil. But I am not sure about the combination of supplements/medication and adding more magnesium is a wise thing to do.

 

Greetz!

[Rocky]

Hi all,

 

I want to share an update. The last time I asked some questions about reinstatement to find some relief in my withdrawal symptoms. After some reading on this site and the high risk of messing my nerve system even more up then it already is, I decided not to try a reinstatement. I am 10,5 months off Paxil now so I probably should hang in there till symptoms become less. Eventhough I went to see my psychiatrist for one last time. Just to see what her diagnosis would be based on my symptoms. She listened to my story and was immediately sure that I was dealing with a depression. I told her about my cognitive problems and extremely slow thinking, fatigue, the nerve pain in my face and head and some other symptoms. She told me that when your depressed everything in your body and head runs slow. It made sence but all these other symptoms that came up after stopping Paxil where just somatic complaints belonging to a depression she said. I guess thats her excuse instead of blaiming Paxil for all this. I had some physical examinations and nothing is found so it must be a depression, she said. To strengthen her diagnosis she made me fill out a Beck Depression Inventory test to see how high my depression score would be. Of course I had a high score in this test so she advised me to treat this depression. Cymbalta 30mg would help me out, especially since it also works against nerve pain. That moment is when I was done talking to her and said her friendly goodbye. She clearly didn't know anything about SSRI withdrawal and thats sad but okay. But not wanting to know about the bad effects of antidepressant gave me a lot of anger and the feeling of being alone in this. I can better start talking to a wall instead of a psychiatrist or doctor again lol. Really sad..

 

My days at the moment are still very hard to go through. As I told earlier I was starting to get panic fealings etc. back day by day. This was till the beginning of March. Then the anhedonia and emotional numbness came back again. Not being able to feel anything again, not being able to panic, cry, laugh, get touched by anthing etc. is so frustrating. It's like living in a dream when awake and feeling no connection to myself at all. I started to notice that this anhedonia state comes along with muscle stiffness and muscle twitching in my body. Maybe this is my wave, I don't know.. I am dealing with different terrible symptoms everyday. We'll see howlong this takes till it goes back that anxious state. I am going to register it daily to see what happends.

 

All the best! Justin

 

PS. Is there maybe anyone who wants to have a look on my supplement/medication use? Any thoughts, suggestions are welcome.

[Rocky]

Hi all,

 

 

Since yesterday I am one year free of Paxil and one year in my withdrawal recovery, so a little party over here “yaaay”.

 

 

The last 2 months I have made some chances in my life to help my recovery. I quit smoking since March! I slowely reduced the amounts of cigarette over a couple of weeks and then stopped. Not sure if smoking had any effect on my nerve system or recovery process but it’s always healthier not to smoke. Unfortunately I can’not experience a sense of pride being numb all the time. But I know it’s the best thing to do

 

 

 

Then I had to quit therapy because it was to stressful. I just had no energy to take part in therapy. When people were talking around me I couldn’t even hear myself think. To bad but I guess, for now, it was the best thing to do. Besides that I gave up seeking medical help. Doctors simply do not know what I am dealing with and what to do about it. I did start physiotherapy for some low intensity workout. Just to do something for my fitness and muscles in this period where I have to rest a lot. I go there twice a week but maybe that’s a bit to much and in a to early stage of recovery. I am not sure. After a workout I am really tired but I am also that tired before I start on the workout so I have no idea if it’s good or bad for my recovery. And only while doing the 10 minute cardio part I notice my breathing doesn’t go up with my activity, it stays a bit slow. I'm considering going to the physio one once a week, I really don’t want to slow down my recovery by forcing my nerve system.

 

 

My symptoms are still the same as some time ago. I got eye problems (feeling I have crossed eyes, which I haven’t) and blurred vision. Sometimes I got some visual problems like color spots and seeing some sort of shadows around objects, I still got no emotions at all. So not being able to cry, laugh, feeling nervous, get motivated etc. Really frustrating this emotional numbness or anhedonia. And this frustration and aggression is something I can feel strange enough. The scary part about this is that it gives me another character. I can be really unkind to people around me and I can’t chance it in that moment so I try to control these emotions. Why this happens, I don’t know. I always used to have a lot of patience and empathy to others. Hopefully this will be back someday.

 

 

The cognitiv problems still exist as well (concentration, slow thinking, short term memory). But the worst psychic part is the really terrible depersonalization/derealization. It’s like I lost all contact with myself but I still have a bit control. My voice sounds like a stranger most of the time and my reflection in the mirror doesn’t feel like me but it is me, it can be really frightening if you put your focus to much on it. Derealization makes me feel like I am in a dream. I don’t feel the days pass by, they just go by and then I can’t remember much of it the next day. Even when I go for a walk I feel like I am not really there in that situation, but I do know I am walking there and what direction I am going to.  

 

 

Happily some physical symptoms such as nerve pain, muscle twitching, head pressure etc. reduced a lot over the months. I also noticed that these pains are/where on the right sight of my brain and the left side seem to be ok, very strange. The hardest physical symptoms I am dealing are fatigue and inertia. Being tired all the time, every day. Even when my nights are good and I get enough sleep I am still tired. And if I don’t get enough sleep or I fall asleep to late my symptoms are worse the next day.

 

 

So one year off Paxil and still struggling. Stupid medication!! Not even your nerve system gets damaged, your life does as well. Living outside of society, having my life on hold and being home alone most of the time, all awesome! But however I’ll keep going for recovery and won’t give up.

 

 

Greetz,

 

Justin

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Toulouse]

Hey Rocky, how's your recovery going at this point?  I am 14 months off of Paxil (after being on 14 years). I've had lots of ups and downs, sharing many of your symptoms. I've been getting muscle twitches all over (for the last two weeks).  Glad to see your twitching subsided.  Hope your other symptoms lifted.