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dluv: Been toughing it out for over two years, now what?


dluv

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Posted

I'm thinking of reinstating, here's the story:

 

A couple of years ago I took my last dose of Effexor. Weaned as per the doctor's instructions: went down from 150mg to 0mg in around 3 months. (Boy did she know what she was doing)

Around the time I took my last quarter pill I got my very first withdrawal symptom: an overactive bladder! Then came the Insomnia, muscle tension, indigestion, nausea, diarrhoea, flu like symptoms and headaches, itching, tinnitus, mood swings, hyperarousal, constant anxiety, difficulty concentrating, hypomania (now imagine a hyped up voice announcing festively, AND MORE!) 

 

Now I'll just throw in a bit of history so you guys can see the mess my doctors and I have made with some very dangerous drugs. 

Age 20 - given Sertraline, switched after a couple of weeks to cipralex (I think) after about a year switched to Effexor (150 XR) and stuck with it until age 24, quit Effexor cold turkey for a few months then resumed imipramine, quit after a week and went on to take Cymbalta for a few months then switched to Effexor again until age 27, tapered for 2-3 months and been off any sort of psychiatric drug since. (am 29 now) As you can see Effexor is the main culprit here.

 

So I've been trying to tough out the waves and squeeze every bit of energy I have in my hypomanic windows for the last two years which hasn't worked all that well, but still well enough for me to want to believe it'll be good eventually. 

Then about a month ago I started developing this extremely unnerving sleep pattern where I basically sleep every other night for around four hours (in chunks of two). Needless to say the anxiety that ensues is insufferable and I am currently pretty much disabled. Also, this worsening of symptoms may or may not have happened due to me experimenting with St Johns Wart (another bad call on my end) for about a month with this bad wave starting around three weeks in.

 

 

I've tried Bendryl and Melatonin to aid with sleeping but they only seem to work every other night ;) Now I'm pretty sure that a neurologist would want to put me on either a sleep medication or a benzo, and I figure, that another thing to withdraw from is just what I need, y'know? So I'm thinking that reinstating and doing a real slow wean may be the smartest option, but by now I'm pretty much scared shitless given the bad choices I've done in the past (If only I could manage to work for as long and hard as I do cry about the stupidity of ever touching an antidepressant to begin with)

 

Anyway, I'd appreciate anything from an advice to just a hello. I've been lurking here for some time and I've learned a lot. Hoping that in due time I'll be able to share positive experiences and advice, for now I can certainly tell you what not to do :)

 

Daniel

 

2008 Cipralex

2009-2012 150mg Effexor

2013 60mg Cymbalta

MID 2013-2015 75mg Effexor

LATE 2017 1 MONTH SJW

  • ChessieCat changed the title to dluv: Been toughing it out for over two years, now what?
  • Moderator Emeritus
Posted

Hi dluv and welcome, finally, to SA.

 

It's a shame you didn't introduce yourself when you first joined back in April 2016.

 

29 minutes ago, dluv said:

Weaned as per the doctor's instructions: went down from 150mg to 0mg in around 3 months. (Boy did she know what she was doing)

 

I am assuming that you comment is sarcastic.  If it isn't, then it should be!

 

Please create your drug signature so we can see your history at a glance whenever you post.  Please include SJW.  These are the instructions:

 

 A request: Would you summarize your history in a signature - ALL drugs, doses, dates, and discontinuations & reinstatements, in the last 12-24 months particularly?

  • Please leave out symptoms and diagnoses.
  • A list is easier to understand than one or multiple paragraphs. 
  • Any drugs prior to 24 months ago can just be listed with start and stop years.
  • Please use actual dates or approximate dates (mid-June, Late October) rather than relative time frames (last week, 3 months ago)
  • Spell out months, e.g. "October" or "Oct."; 9/1/2016 can be interpreted as Jan. 9, 2016 or Sept. 1, 2016.
  • Link to Account Settings – Create or Edit a signature.

 

These really helped me to understand what SA recommends and how things can be up and down and sideways during withdrawal:

 

Brain Remodelling


Video:  Healing From Antidepressants - Patterns of Recovery

 

and from:  What is Happening in Your Brain

 

"Basically- you have a building where the MAJOR steel structures are [...] to be rebuilt at different times - ALL while people are coming and going in the building and attempting to work.

It would be like if the World Trade Center Towers hadn't completely fallen - but had crumbled inside in different places.. Imagine if you were [...] to rebuild the tower - WHILE people were coming and going and [...] to work in the building!  You'd have to set up a temporary elevator - but when you needed to fix part of that area, you'd have to tear down that elevator and set up a temporary elevator somewhere else. And so on. You'd have to build, work around, then tear down, then build again, then work around, then build... ALL while people are coming and going, ALL while the furniture is being replaced, ALL while the walls are getting repainted... ALL while [...] is going on INSIDE the building. No doubt it would be chaotic. That is EXACTLY what is happening with windows and waves.  The windows are where the body has "got it right" for a day or so - but then the building shifts and the brain works on something else - and it's chaos again while another temporary pathway is set up to reroute function until repairs are made. 


And just like the Twin Towers- it's possible - but the building is a major effort -and it takes a good year or more sometimes. smiley.gif"

 

st-johns-wort-hypericum-perforatum

 

If you haven't realised by now, it is better to try non drug techniques:

 

Non-drug techniques


Sleep Hypnosis, Guided Meditations, Calming Videos


Sleep problems - that awful withdrawal insomnia

 

The only two supplements that SA recommends are Magnesium and Omega-3 Fish Oil

 

This is your own Introduction topic where you can ask questions and journal your progress.

* NO LONGER ACTIVE on SA *

MISSION ACCOMPLISHED:  (6 year taper)      0mg Pristiq  on 13th November 2021

ADs since ~1992:  25+ years - 1 unknown, Prozac (muscle weakness), Zoloft; citalopram (pooped out) CTed (very sick for 2.5 wks a few months after); Pristiq:  50mg 2012, 100mg beg 2013 (Serotonin Toxicity)  Tapering from Oct 2015 - 13 Nov 2021   LAST DOSE 0.0025mg

Post 0 updates start here    My tapering program     My Intro (goes to tapering graph)

 VIDEO:   Antidepressant Withdrawal Syndrome and its Management

Posted

Daniel welcome to sa, i am so glad you found this informative site.

Congratulations also on being two years drug free...for many, a most enviable place to be in.

17 hours ago, dluv said:

I'm thinking of reinstating,

 

Please think very carefully before you decide this one. Have you read some of the success stories. see the thread.

Two years is still very early days. You have accomplished a huge thing to be 2 yrs free. If it were me i would stay the course drug free also refusing  to take/experiment with any herbal or natural psychoactive remedies. Resolve to take nothing but photos however some are taking omega 3 supplements and magnesium and finding them helpful. Tere is a link about this.

I experienced improvements in year 3. Healing from this pharma assault is very slow...think in years.

If you do ri and feel better ....then what!! or you ri then feel worse, much much worse.... there is no guarantee and in my opinion it is not worth the risk.

Interestingly my sleep pattern seemed to deteriorate at about 2 years off too. and at 7 yrs off is still an issue for me. Sleep issues are very common in wdl.

 Hang in there

nz11

 

 

 

Thought for the day: Lets stand up, and let’s speak out , together. G Olsen

We have until the 14th. Feb 2018. 

URGENT REQUEST Please consider submitting  for the petition on Prescribed Drug Dependence and Withdrawal currently awaiting its third consideration at the Scottish Parliament. You don't even have to be from Scotland. By clicking on the link below you can read some of the previous submissions but be warned many of them are quite harrowing.

http://www.parliament.scot/GettingInvolved/Petitions/PE01651   

Please tell them about your problems taking and withdrawing from antidepressants and/or benzos.

Send by email to petitions@parliament.scot and quote PE01651 in the subject heading. Keep to a maximum of 3 sides of A4 and you can't name for legal reasons any doctor you have consulted. Tell them if you wish to remain anonymous. We need the numbers to help convince the committee members we are not isolated cases. You have until mid February. Thank you

Recovering paxil addict

None of the published articles shed light on what ssri's ... actually do or what their hazards might be. Healy 2013. 

This is so true, with anything you get on these drugs, dependance, tapering, withdrawal symptoms, side effects, just silent. And if there is something mentioned then their is a serious disconnect between what is said and reality! 

  "Every time I read of a multi-person shooting, I always presume that person had just started a SSRI or had just stopped."  Dr Mosher. Me too! 

Over two decades later, the number of antidepressant prescriptions a year is slightly more than the number of people in the Western world. Most (nine out of 10) prescriptions are for patients who faced difficulties on stopping, equating to about a tenth of the population. These patients are often advised to continue treatment because their difficulties indicate they need ongoing treatment, just as a person with diabetes needs insulin. Healy 2015

I believe the ssri era will soon stand as one of the most shameful in the history of medicine. Healy 2015

Let people help people ... in a natural, kind, non-addictive (and non-big pharma) way. J Broadley 2017

 

 

Posted
17 hours ago, ChessieCat said:

I am assuming that you comment is sarcastic.  If it isn't, then it should be!

Absolutely sarcastic. Thanks for the welcome and all the info! I updated my signature as per your instructions (hopefully I got it right)

11 minutes ago, nz11 said:

Daniel welcome to sa, i am so glad you found this informative site.

Congratulations also on being two years drug free...for many, a most enviable place to be in.

 

Please think very carefully before you decide this one. Have you read some of the success stories. see the thread.

Two years is still very early days. You have accomplished a huge thing to be 2 yrs free. If it were me i would stay the course drug free also refusing  to take/experiment with any herbal or natural psychoactive remedies. Resolve to take nothing but photos however some are taking omega 3 supplements and magnesium and finding them helpful. Tere is a link about this.

I experienced improvements in year 3. Healing from this pharma assault is very slow...think in years.

If you do ri and feel better ....then what!! or you ri then feel worse, much much worse.... there is no guarantee and in my opinion it is not worth the risk.

Interestingly my sleep pattern seemed to deteriorate at about 2 years off too. and at 7 yrs off is still an issue for me. Sleep issues are very common in wdl.

 Hang in there

nz11

 

 

 

You know what? That's the best thing anybody could have said to me at this point. Funny enough, a couple of days ago I've instructed my dad (who supports me greatly on this) to beg me not to touch the meds if ever I show signs of wanting to go back on them. Whenever I hit a rough patch I tend to get desperate and forget that things do change and patience is key. That's why I tried SJW which, I pray is not the cause of this setback. I'm not used to thinking in terms of anything taking years and I guess this is a great life lesson. 

Thanks a lot, your input just made my night a lot better.

2008 Cipralex

2009-2012 150mg Effexor

2013 60mg Cymbalta

MID 2013-2015 75mg Effexor

LATE 2017 1 MONTH SJW

  • Moderator Emeritus
Posted
2 hours ago, dluv said:

Absolutely sarcastic.

 

I'm really pleased to hear that! :D

 

2 hours ago, dluv said:

I updated my signature as per your instructions

 

Your signature isn't showing below you posts.  After typing it in you need to click Save.

 

2 hours ago, dluv said:

I'm not used to thinking in terms of anything taking years

 

Many people aren't.  Instant coffee, fast foods, credit cards, high speed internet, mobile phones, entertainment on demand, freeways/motorways, etc etc.  It's not surprising.

* NO LONGER ACTIVE on SA *

MISSION ACCOMPLISHED:  (6 year taper)      0mg Pristiq  on 13th November 2021

ADs since ~1992:  25+ years - 1 unknown, Prozac (muscle weakness), Zoloft; citalopram (pooped out) CTed (very sick for 2.5 wks a few months after); Pristiq:  50mg 2012, 100mg beg 2013 (Serotonin Toxicity)  Tapering from Oct 2015 - 13 Nov 2021   LAST DOSE 0.0025mg

Post 0 updates start here    My tapering program     My Intro (goes to tapering graph)

 VIDEO:   Antidepressant Withdrawal Syndrome and its Management

Posted
On 9/23/2017 at 3:05 AM, ChessieCat said:

 

I'm really pleased to hear that! :D

 

 

Your signature isn't showing below you posts.  After typing it in you need to click Save.

 

 

Many people aren't.  Instant coffee, fast foods, credit cards, high speed internet, mobile phones, entertainment on demand, freeways/motorways, etc etc.  It's not surprising.

So I'm thinking this recent sleep problem getting worse may be me withdrawing from the hypericum??? I'm panicking 24/7 Idk it's getting unbearable maybe I should start taking a really small dose again, anybody? I'm going nuts here and theres no doctor I can trust

2008 Cipralex

2009-2012 150mg Effexor

2013 60mg Cymbalta

MID 2013-2015 75mg Effexor

LATE 2017 1 MONTH SJW

Posted

Three weeks after stopping the SJW I took for a month I'm experiencing what I am now pretty much convinced is akathisia. Had it along the way to varying degrees but never so persistent. Sleep is impossible and too tired to walk around, feel stuck in an impossible state. Is it possible to have withdrawal at its worst after 2 years? 

2008 Cipralex

2009-2012 150mg Effexor

2013 60mg Cymbalta

MID 2013-2015 75mg Effexor

LATE 2017 1 MONTH SJW

Posted

damn that sucks. 2 years is a great achievement. I'm at 7 months. feeling terrible, but kinda good, yet still bad. I can't even tell anymore. I'm thinking of going back to the hospital. good idea or bad idea ?? 😕

Risperidone - started at 10mg

Decreased to 1mg within the month

Abilify - started at 10mg

Decreased to 1mg

[Oct - Nov 2016]

Continued for approx. 2 - 3 weeks upon psych ward release

Invega injection one time

[Feb 2017]

Posted
1 minute ago, AntiAntiPsychotic said:

damn that sucks. 2 years is a great achievement. I'm at 7 months. feeling terrible, but kinda good, yet still bad. I can't even tell anymore. I'm thinking of going back to the hospital. good idea or bad idea ?? 😕

What are you feeling exactly? Idk I'd refrain from going to a hospital as long as I can, I mean what can they do except load you with benzos?

2008 Cipralex

2009-2012 150mg Effexor

2013 60mg Cymbalta

MID 2013-2015 75mg Effexor

LATE 2017 1 MONTH SJW

Posted

I can't sleep as we speak. Everynight. I'm up til the sun comes out. I yawn over and over again but never feel the tired feeling. I eventually fall into somewhat of a sleep state & wake up again in like 4 or 5 hrs. Usually from a horrible dream.

 

sometimes headaches, sore eyes & my mind won't rest. constant random thoughts. I can't think clearly as I used to. low energy. no motivation. I can't stress enough about the thinking. it's like mind is impaired, can't problem solve how I use to, loss of words sometimes. ahhhhhhhhhhh it's not even easy to put into words. 

 

 

Risperidone - started at 10mg

Decreased to 1mg within the month

Abilify - started at 10mg

Decreased to 1mg

[Oct - Nov 2016]

Continued for approx. 2 - 3 weeks upon psych ward release

Invega injection one time

[Feb 2017]

Posted
3 minutes ago, AntiAntiPsychotic said:

I can't sleep as we speak. Everynight. I'm up til the sun comes out. I yawn over and over again but never feel the tired feeling. I eventually fall into somewhat of a sleep state & wake up again in like 4 or 5 hrs. Usually from a horrible dream.

 

sometimes headaches, sore eyes & my mind won't rest. constant random thoughts. I can't think clearly as I used to. low energy. no motivation. I can't stress enough about the thinking. it's like mind is impaired, can't problem solve how I use to, loss of words sometimes. ahhhhhhhhhhh it's not even easy to put into words. 

 

 

Damn I know this all too well same here :( I feel for you. Let's try to survive another day, another week, every single day is an achievement, we have to be positive about this somehow, people here have things get better for them it must be true for us too

2008 Cipralex

2009-2012 150mg Effexor

2013 60mg Cymbalta

MID 2013-2015 75mg Effexor

LATE 2017 1 MONTH SJW

Posted

it's getting worse. I live with my mom who's unstable herself in a small 2 bedroom apartment. neighboors won't shut up & I keep hearing voices that somehow know my problems and won't stfu. I have court every month due to a legal matter & may end up in jail. I don't give a fk about anything or anyone anymore. I haven't showered in like a week. I have no energy to wash my clothes. it's messed up because I was always the opposite. always organized & clean. I can't even explain it. these meds have flipped my life & nobody understands & fk them anyway

Risperidone - started at 10mg

Decreased to 1mg within the month

Abilify - started at 10mg

Decreased to 1mg

[Oct - Nov 2016]

Continued for approx. 2 - 3 weeks upon psych ward release

Invega injection one time

[Feb 2017]

  • 6 months later...
Posted

Update: crazy akathisia has stopped thank god. I started supping with 450mg magnesium every evening, seems to be helping with mood regulation (I've logged a pretty stable mood for almost a month!) 

 

Insomnia persists -- If I manage to fall asleep I wake up after approx 3 hours. Other days can't sleep at all.

Other symptoms all seem to be related to stress: constant muscle tention all over (jaw, shoulders, stomach, I even clench my fists without realizing) tinnitus, bowel problems

 

And hair loss. please god stop the terrible hair loss.

 

If anybody reads this, what do you think about private blood tests for vitamins and minerals/hormones?

 

 

2008 Cipralex

2009-2012 150mg Effexor

2013 60mg Cymbalta

MID 2013-2015 75mg Effexor

LATE 2017 1 MONTH SJW

  • Administrator
Posted

Good to hear, dluv.

 

Magnesium in smaller doses throughout the day is better absorbed than a large dose.

 

Not sure what "private blood tests" are. In the US, one can get a routine panel for vitamins and minerals. This may be helpful to spot outright deficiencies.

 

Testing hormones tends to be very complicated and only top specialist know how to interpret the results. See Important topics about tests, supplements, treatments, diet and other topics in the Symptoms and Self-Care forum.

 

You may be able to improve your sleep. Please look carefully at the sleep topics here Important topics about symptoms, including sleep problems

 

 

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

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