Alanmane: try hard

[Alanmane]

On 3/7/2020 at 1:22, Altostrata said:

Debes dejar de castigarte, Alanmane. ¿Puedes hablar con tu terapeuta sobre esto?

I tried psychoanalysis but I did not feel a taste or felt that speaking as a monologue about my life would help so I gave it up, maybe another type of therapy would be useful but I feel very confused, I am not sure what I feel is very difficult Because of the reduction or because I am falling into a depressive state, I do not have that security in my overwhelm and I am a psychologist without information about this does not give me confidence.

[Altostrata]

Alan, we help people go off drugs. If you find your old fears and worries emerge without drugs, you will need to figure out how to manage them. Psychotherapy is one way to do this. You need to figure out how to make it or something else work for you. Nobody else can solve this for you.

[Alanmane]

6 hours ago, Cocopuffz17 said:

 

Nunca digas eso otra vez. Dejar estas drogas es lo más difícil que una persona hará en su vida.  

 

Tus emociones volverán. Todas esas cosas que dijiste que tenía y que revertí con el tiempo desde que dejé mi medicamento. 

 

 Tu cuerpo necesita tiempo para sanar. Los cambios nutricionales de la OMI son absolutamente necesarios. Traté 3 veces antes de dejar mi medicamento y no pude hacerlo por completo. Tuve que cambiar todo mi estilo de vida para poder soportar esta tormenta.

 

Cada día que pasa está un día más cerca de ser curado 

I'm sorry to treat myself the way I do, lately I don't feel love for anything, especially because I don't like the way I am since I reached a dose of less than 40 pearls, it's ridiculous. I know what I am doing is very difficult but I also know that for years I have not worked on my personal development and now with hardly any antidepressant my life is in chaos, I still work, I have friends, family, money, food ... but I feel terrible and inferior. I am going to stay on this dose for several months and I hope to gain energy since now I hardly concentrate or think, my system is very low on energy and my work demands a lot.

 

Thanks for the support, talking to you is essential for me. A hug.

[Alanmane]

4 hours ago, wantrelief said:

Hola amanemane

 

Te he estado alentando desde lejos y quería hacerte saber que a menudo me siento similar a lo que has escrito (¡siempre estoy impresionado con lo bien que te expresas cuando el inglés no es tu lengua materna!), Así que creo lo que piensas están pasando está relacionado con el retiro. 

 

También me preocupa cómo quedará una vez fuera de la droga (o las drogas en mi caso) pero tengo que creer que eventualmente seremos como otros aquí que no se sintieron bien y sanaron. Todo lleva mucho más tiempo del que hubiéramos imaginado y, mientras tanto, es muy difícil.

 

Estoy contigo mientras navegamos en este viaje tan difícil.

 

Thank you very much for the support, from the heart. I also believe that everything is related to withdrawal, not necessarily with the withdrawal effects, but with the adaptation to a life without drugs, the change is radical and painful. Deep down I have faith that all this will change and that the damage is not permanent, although it will leave a mark on all life.

 

We can with this, I am also with you on this path.

[ChessieCat]

9 minutes ago, Alanmane said:

tried psychoanalysis but I did not feel a taste or felt that speaking as a monologue about my life would help so I gave it up, maybe another type of therapy would be useful

 

Google translation:

 

Existen diferentes tipos de terapia. Hablar sobre sus problemas con alguien puede ayudar un poco, sin embargo, es mejor si una persona aprende formas de ayudarlo a lidiar con las cosas de su vida.

La terapia cognitiva conductual puede ayudarlo a cambiar los patrones de pensamiento incorrectos. También puedes aprender habilidades para la vida; cómo hacer frente y responder cuando algo sucede en tu vida (en lugar de reaccionar).

 

From English:

 

There are different types of therapy. Talking about your problems with someone can help a bit, however it is best if a person learns ways to help him deal with the things in his life.

Cognitive behavioral therapy can help you change wrong thinking patterns. You can also learn life skills; how to cope and respond when something happens in your life (instead of reacting).

[Alanmane]

El 4/7/2020 a las 1:54, ChessieCat dijo:

 

Traducción de Google:

 

Existen diferentes tipos de terapia. Hablar sobre sus problemas con alguien puede ayudar un poco, sin embargo, es mejor si una persona aprende formas de ayudar a lidiar con las cosas de su vida.

La terapia cognitiva conductual puede ayudarlo a cambiar los patrones de pensamiento incorrectos. También puedes aprender habilidades para la vida; cómo hacer frente y responder cuando algo sucede en tu vida (en lugar de reaccionar).

 

De inglés:

 

Existen diferentes tipos de terapia. Hablar sobre sus problemas con alguien puede ayudar un poco, sin embargo, es mejor si una persona aprende formas de ayudar a lidiar con las cosas de su vida.

La terapia cognitiva conductual puede ayudarlo a cambiar los patrones de pensamiento incorrectos. También puedes aprender habilidades para la vida; cómo hacer frente y responder cuando algo sucede en tu vida (en lugar de reaccionar).

At this point, telling how I feel my mind is too unpleasant to tell even friends, it is no longer that I feel bad emotionally, it is that my mind does not work productively, I even have trouble articulating words when speaking or saying phrases, finding words, I feel that I do not think while I act, there is no voice in my conscience and everything is an emptiness, I feel that I do not use logic or reason, I really feel sick and the only thing that has changed in the last months is the least dose of effect, I cannot understand all this and I doubt that a psychologist will help me with my executive and mental functions improved, I think that deep down I am sure that my state is pathological and that the years of antidepressants have left me like this.

[Cocopuffz17]

2 minutes ago, Alanmane said:

At this point, telling how I feel my mind is too unpleasant to tell even friends, it is no longer that I feel bad emotionally, it is that my mind does not work productively, I even have trouble articulating words when speaking or saying phrases, finding words, I feel that I do not think while I act, there is no voice in my conscience and everything is an emptiness, I feel that I do not use logic or reason, I really feel sick and the only thing that has changed in the last months is the least dose of effect, I cannot understand all this and I doubt that a psychologist will help me with my executive and mental functions improved, I think that deep down I am sure that my state is pathological and that the years of antidepressants have left me like this.

What you just described is exactly what I went through. I no longer have these challenges. Time healed them for me. I was unable to put my sentences together or my thoughts. It will get better. Push through you got this! Everyday that passes is one day closer to being healed. 

[ChessieCat]

I think that what you are experiencing now is because you have tapered too fast.

[Alanmane]

I want to count how things are after keeping for a few weeks in 26 pearls. It seems that my current state in this dose is what you would commonly call moderate depression, I have felt similar to now on other occasions and it is something that I can hardly handle since the brain fog is simply severe (it did not react quickly, I have no thoughts , it feels like having no conscience or an inner voice, I forget things that just happened ...

 

I feel like I have dementia with 28 years of life). My mood is pessimistic and dull, I am sad all the time and I feel disconnected from people, I am not interested in anyone nor do I feel passion for anything. It is already absurd think about if this is me without the alteration of the pills, or if I am like this because of the withdrawal and I will improve with time, neither I nor anyone else can know the answer and I only know that I do not like the way I have been for a few months, only the dose has changed, nothing else in my life has gotten worse so I fear that it has to do with being on venlafaxine.

 

I think that when I reach 0mg and after a certain time, if I don't improve and I see that I am damaged by taking this drug, I will not be able to bear it. A while ago I had imagination, intelligence, grace, personality ... now I feel that there is nothing. Yes, I am hard on myself, the fact is that I cannot bear to see myself like this and I do not know how to increase my vitality and my energy, lately I even find it difficult to speak for losing the thread of what I want to express, sometimes I stutter and feel ashamed because I transmit vulnerability and pain.

 

I'm very tired.

Quiero contar cómo están las cosas después de guardar durante unas semanas en 26 perlas. Parece que mi estado actual en esta dosis es lo que comúnmente llamarías depresión moderada, me he sentido similar a ahora en otras ocasiones y es algo que apenas puedo manejar ya que la niebla cerebral es simplemente severa (no reaccionó rápidamente, No tengo pensamientos, se siente como si no tuviera conciencia o una voz interior, olvido cosas que acaban de suceder ...

 

Siento que tengo demencia con 28 años de vida). Mi estado de ánimo es pesimista y aburrido, estoy triste todo el tiempo y me siento desconectado de la gente, no estoy interesado en nadie ni siento pasión por nada. Ya es absurdo pensar si este soy yo sin la alteración de las píldoras, o si soy así debido a la abstinencia y mejoraré con el tiempo, ni yo ni nadie más podemos saber la respuesta y solo sé que sí. No me gusta la forma en que he estado durante unos meses, solo la dosis ha cambiado, nada más en mi vida ha empeorado, así que me temo que tiene que ver con tomar venlafaxina.

 

Creo que cuando llegue a 0 mg y después de un cierto tiempo, si no mejoro y veo que estoy dañado por tomar este medicamento, no podré soportarlo. Hace un tiempo tenía imaginación, inteligencia, gracia, personalidad ... ahora siento que no hay nada. Sí, soy duro conmigo mismo, el hecho es que no puedo soportar verme así y no sé cómo aumentar mi vitalidad y mi energía, últimamente incluso me cuesta hablar por perder el hilo de lo que quiero. para expresar, a veces tartamudeo y me siento avergonzado porque transmito vulnerabilidad y dolor. Estoy muy cansado.

[Alanmane]

On 6/7/2020 at 0:43, ChessieCat said:

Creo que lo que estás experimentando ahora es porque has disminuido demasiado rápido.

Probably, i don t reduce more for long time.

[ChessieCat]

2 hours ago, Alanmane said:

Probably, i don t reduce more for long time.

 

Good idea.

 

Give your brain time to make the adjustments it needs to make.

 

Even though I've done a slow taper I've had times during my taper when I had a lot of trouble finding words and it sometimes happens now, but not very often.  I found it helpful to do simple puzzles which helps to exercise the brain.  For a while I could not play Angry Birds on Facebook because it was too stimulating and made me anxious and stressed.  I would play Candy Crush, but in the beginning it might take a little bit of time to find a match because my brain was slow.  There were times when I could not play word games or number puzzles which I love doing and have always been good at but I am able to do that more now.  I haven't been able to read a book for quite a while now, other than a couple of short simple books but it was only because I wanted to learn about the subject and couldn't get an audio version.  I listen to podcasts and audiobooks.  And I used to listen to them and easily forget what I had heard but I'm starting to remember more now.

 

I have noticed a big improvement, but it did take time, and I had to accept that it was part of getting off the drug and learn to be patient.

 

Worrying about it adds stress and when we are stressed it makes things worse.

 

 

Edited July 17, 2020 by ChessieCat

[Alanmane]

On 17/7/2020 at 2:34, ChessieCat said:

 

Buena idea.

 

Déle tiempo a su cerebro para hacer los ajustes que necesita hacer.

 

A pesar de que he hecho una reducción lenta, he tenido momentos durante mi disminución cuando tuve muchos problemas para encontrar palabras y a veces sucede ahora, pero no muy a menudo. Me resultó útil hacer rompecabezas simples que ayuden a ejercitar el cerebro. Durante un tiempo no pude jugar a Angry Birds en Facebook porque era demasiado estimulante y me ponía ansioso y estresado. Jugaría a Candy Crush, pero al principio podría llevar un poco de tiempo encontrar una pareja porque mi cerebro estaba lento. Hubo momentos en que no podía jugar juegos de palabras o acertijos numéricos, lo que me encanta hacer y siempre he sido bueno, pero ahora puedo hacerlo más. No he podido leer un libro desde hace bastante tiempo, aparte de un par de libros sencillos, pero fue solo porque quería aprender sobre el tema y no pude obtener una versión de audio. Escucho podcasts y audiolibros. Y solía escucharlos y olvidar fácilmente lo que había escuchado, pero ahora empiezo a recordar más.

 

He notado una gran mejora, pero tomó tiempo, y tuve que aceptar que era parte de dejar el medicamento y aprender a ser paciente.

 

Preocuparse por eso agrega estrés y cuando estamos estresados empeora las cosas.

 

 

Hi Chessie, thanks for responding and telling your experience, I appreciate reading things similar to what happens to me, although somehow I tend to think that what happens to me is not common and very serious, I think so because for months my ability to analysis, concentration, speech, memory and other cognitive abilities are affected, the other day I played board games with friends and I couldn't have fun being aware that my mind works slower, with a big fog, it really costs me a lot to accept that I've been dumb, I don't think clearly and I'm obviously scared and depressed about it.

 

I am afraid that throughout my final tapper this will get worse and it could be months or years like this and thinking about the possibility of not improving takes away the desire of everything. I literally feel as if my soul and my intellect are dead and my whole being is full of fear and self-contempt. I already knew that it would not be so easy, that it is not simply withdrawing the medication and already being well, although I did not imagine that it would be so difficult, because when it is deprived of clear reasoning it is difficult to see which way to go or what to do, the body asks to be in bed and sleep all the time.

 

I must try to stop worrying about this, the anguish and stress increases the fog.

[ChessieCat]

2 hours ago, Alanmane said:

I must try to stop worrying about this, the anguish and stress increases the fog.

 

Yes it does.  That is because you add stress to your body.  And when you are stressing about it, the brain has to deal with the stress instead of adapting to not getting as much of the drug.  And you do have control over the worry.  It's a good idea to do some relaxation a few times a day.  That way the stress and anxiety doesn't build up so high.

So instead of      oooooooooooooooooooooooo

it's more              ooooooooooooooooooooooooo

 

Have a look at the self help resources on this excellent website.  Scroll down the page a bit to see the links to them.

 

https://www.getselfhelp.co.uk/selfhelp.htm

 

2 hours ago, Alanmane said:

I tend to think that what happens to me is not common and very serious,

 

A lot of members think like this.  But what they, and you, are experiencing is just common, everyday antidepressant withdrawal symptoms.  Have you seen this list?

 

Dr Joseph Glenmullen's WD Symptoms Checklist

 

3 hours ago, Alanmane said:

I am afraid that throughout my final tapper this will get worse and it could be months or years like this and thinking about the possibility of not improving takes away the desire of everything.

 

Check out this post.

 

And this link is to the search results for anhedonia in the success stories.

[Alanmane]

On 21/7/2020 at 3:18, ChessieCat said:

 

Si lo hace Eso es porque agrega estrés a su cuerpo. Y cuando estás estresado por eso, el cerebro tiene que lidiar con el estrés en lugar de adaptarse a no obtener tanta droga. Y tienes control sobre la preocupación. Es una buena idea relajarse un poco varias veces al día. De esa forma, el estrés y la ansiedad no se acumulan tanto.

Entonces, en lugar de o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o

es más              o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o

 

Eche un vistazo a los recursos de autoayuda en este excelente sitio web. Desplácese un poco hacia abajo para ver los enlaces a ellos.

 

https://www.getselfhelp.co.uk/selfhelp.htm

 

 

Muchos miembros piensan así. Pero lo que ellos y usted están experimentando es común, los síntomas de abstinencia de antidepresivos cotidianos. ¿Has visto esta lista?

 

Lista de verificación de síntomas de WD del Dr. Joseph Glenmullen

 

 

Mira esta publicación .

 

Y este enlace es a los resultados de búsqueda de anhedonia en las historias de éxito.

Thanks for all the Chessie links, reading these things helps me and encourages me to continue.

 

I am trying to do things that help me feel better like dining out, seeing some people ... it is difficult to fight the confusion that I am living, it is a difficult state since cognition is bad surely due to the state of depression that I live , I am almost sure that my mind works slowed down by the strong anhedonia and the negative vision of the future.

 

I do not want to be pessimistic or believe that I can recover, I only see reality and I suffer, because I need my mental abilities back.

[ChessieCat]

5 hours ago, Alanmane said:

it is a difficult state since cognition is bad surely due to the state of depression that I live

 

Instead of thinking of it as depression, think of it as withdrawal.  Withdrawal symptoms will reduce as the brain adapts as time goes by.

 

All we can do is take it one day at a time.  And when it is worse we sometimes have to take it one hour at a time.

[Alanmane]

23 hours ago, ChessieCat said:

 

En lugar de pensar en ella como depresión, piense en ella como abstinencia. Los síntomas de abstinencia se reducirán a medida que el cerebro se adapte con el paso del tiempo.

 

Todo lo que podemos hacer es tomarlo un día a la vez. Y cuando es peor, a veces tenemos que tomarlo una hora a la vez.

I am trying to see it this way, it is not easy since I have believed for years that I am sick with depression and what I feel I relate to it rather than abstinence, rather I see myself as the product of having used effexor for four years and of not having solved psychological problems in a long time, a chaos difficult to manage.

 

Still it is not terrible or extreme, I have a hard time but it is tolerable and I have lived many times in states that were not, so this is the good part of all this.

[Altostrata]

You may be experiencing some withdrawal symptoms, but doing things that are "normal" can help you cope with them while they diminish over time.

 

You have been tapering too fast. That was a mistake. You need to take responsibility for this and put effort into coping. This can be hard but you're the only one who can do it for you.

[Alanmane]

Since I joined this forum 22 months have passed and at that time it was almost 75mg, now I will be around 5mg or so. Maybe it has not been as slow as recommended here but so many months it is not going fast I think ... anyway I can only be responsible for my actions and my psychological state.

[ChessieCat]

27 minutes ago, Alanmane said:

Since I joined this forum 22 months have passed and at that time it was almost 75mg, now I will be around 5mg or so. Maybe it has not been as slow as recommended here but so many months it is not going fast I think

 

You may think that you haven't been going fast but it's not what you think which determines how fast you can go.

 

It's your brain which determines / decides whether you have gone too fast.  Some people can taper faster than 10% every four weeks and some people have to go slower than 10% every four weeks.  The 10% every four weeks taper rate is just a guideline.  We have to listen to our body and notice our withdrawal symptoms and slow down when necessary.  And not to make another reduction until we have stabilised and are at WDnormal.

[Alanmane]

You are right, a part of me does not want to believe that two years reducing is a short time and that it needs much more, I read to so many people who have done it quickly and without problems that I feel bad for me not being equally lucky.

 

What worries me the most is that I have symptoms that go into withdrawal symptoms but they are also classic symptoms of "depression" (lack of motivation, anhedonia, confused thinking, lack of concentration, impaired memory ...), I know that I must believe and have faith in what I am doing and still believe more that what I feel now is my '' not drugged '' state, I doubt that it has any important effect to take 23 pearls from a capsule of 140 of them (37 , 5mg).

 

My self-esteem is getting worse and the fear is increasing because the possibility of experiencing another state of severe depression is something I cannot imagine. I'm sorry if I repeat myself, I don't feel well at all.

[Alanmane]

Note to me about my current state:

 

I am aware that I have been running away from myself for months and not doing things as I should, I do not mind admitting and taking charge of my bad decisions, I have taken socially more times than I have. I should, I've spent more money than I should have, even the other day I drank more of the account and used cocaine with unpleasant results the next day. I try to make a life as if I were not going through an Effexor retreat, giving much importance to my feelings of emptiness, indifference, apathy, despair ... but little importance to hedonistic pleasures, I have a tendency to impulsively seek pleasure .

 

Following this last '' party '' and how bad I have felt for wanting a few hours of enjoyment, I am totally determined to stop with this. I only complicate my life, all my problems are born from my emotional state flooding with fear, I am afraid of too many things. I don't like the person I am after all my experiences and the consumption of antidepressants, that's why I've been choosing the coward's path for months, because I don't know how to feel good about myself and I'm obsessed with abstinence, depression, symptoms I have, how long they will last ... living like this doesn't make sense. Of course, it will be months before I reduce my dose of 25 pearls and once I feel stable I will continue slowly.

 

At the moment my mind is not tolerating well living in a state that any psychiatrist would describe as depressive, I still struggle with the belief that I am not sick, that I live every day empty and afraid, knowing that my mind is collapsed and I am not It allows you to think clearly (brain fog), to be distracted all the time, not to remember things, not to have creativity ... I learned that this was pathological and unacceptable, I just endure because I know that someday I will feel good.

 

I don't want to victimize myself or dramatize myself, I don't think I'm doing it, writing this and seeing how silly I am helps me and makes me realize that much of the problem is me, WD only makes it more difficult.

[ChessieCat]

It's really good that you are learning that some things are not good for you.

 

Try to find non harmful ways to help you get through this time.

 

I found this the other day:  https://www.getselfhelp.co.uk/distract.htm

 

Check out the links on this page.  You might find something that helps you:  https://www.getselfhelp.co.uk/selfhelp.htm

[Alanmane]

12 hours ago, ChessieCat said:

Es realmente bueno que estés aprendiendo que algunas cosas no son buenas para ti.

 

Trate de encontrar formas no perjudiciales para ayudarlo a superar este momento.

 

Encontré esto el otro día:  https://www.getselfhelp.co.uk/distract.htm

 

Mira los enlaces en esta página. Puede encontrar algo que lo ayude:  https://www.getselfhelp.co.uk/selfhelp.htm

Thank a lot for this links, i apreciate that 🙂

[Alanmane]

Today I feel especially bad, I am totally aware of my bad emotional, mental and physical state, today I feel more than ever that everything is united.

 

I have returned to work after twenty days of rest, yesterday it was hard but today it was worse. I am totally anhedonic, apathetic, I do not feel connected to anyone and when I have to do it I do it out of fear and insecurity, I am aware that I transmit it both non-verbally and verbally (I even have difficulties speaking clearly and it is difficult for me to explain things beyond a sentence or two)

 

I realize that I forget things, that I reason ineffectively in situations that were previously easy to see. I feel ashamed, I think that is what most defines how I feel in front of people at work, ashamed for being like this and believing that I am not as good as other people with a fresh and agile mind.

 

I have even come to think that it is better to live with antidepressants than to live in such a sorry way. But I will not, I can take much more and maybe in a while this will improve. I never learned to handle this overwhelming feeling that it even nullifies my psyche, so I opted for drugs, because I never knew how to deal with something that I thought was beyond me.

[Altostrata]

You are imagining people view you as poorly as you view yourself. In reality, they probably think you're a quiet co-worker. You also need to forgive yourself for not being as energetic and alert as you'd like to be. You need to nurture yourself while you recover.

 

How much venlafaxine are you taking now? Please update your signature.

[Alanmane]

He already updated my signature. It is true that in my state I am distorting reality, I am aware and still I live it this way. In January of this year I was taking 50 pearls, now 25, in half a year he reduced by half and that seems to be very fast for me, I suppose he sent me with the strength to lower the dose further and now I suffer the consequences.

 

At least now I am clear about everything I have to avoid, I did not think that I would have my mind in this way, so extremely off and slow at the same time as my emotions, my character ... there is no magic wand, only time, Acting the right way while I feel so bad If all this is a cause of leaving Effexor, I cannot believe the evil of the professionals and pharmaceutical companies that spread this poison.

 

I think being like this is because of the withdrawal and because of how I am without any modifying drugs, I tend to think that much of what I am seeing that I am is real and I don't blame getting off the drug directly.

 

I feel very confused and my cloudy mind is wearing me out.

[kokoro1974]

Google translation:

 

Hello Alanmane, I am from Mexico but I have been to Barcelona many times! I dared to write to you because my story is also similar to yours, marijuana and a toxic family environment triggered panic, anxiety and depression in me. The worst thing of all was that that was what led me to take these psychiatric drugs that are one of the worst things that have happened to me in my life. I'm glad you're leaving them. What has been helping me reduce it is a particular yoga called kundalini yoga. There are many meditations in this discipline that help you a lot to love yourself, to regain confidence in yourself and there are others that help you to remove anxiety and depression. In Barcelona there are many places where you can take kundalini classes. My teacher is the best in the world, but he's in Lleida and it's far away, but you can find a kundalini academy in the area. I promise you will feel much better. If I had found this technique at your age, my life would have been very different from how it has been because I have been taking these pills for 19 years, they are the worst thing in the world with thousands of horrible side effects. Thanks to kundalini I have managed to stop taking the antidepressant, it is the only thing that has helped me on this path. It is a powerful tool. I wish you the best on your way to free yourself from the antidepressant and as everyone on this site says, the slower you leave the antidepressant the less cute you will have. Never use any illegal drug again, they are not good, even if your friends push, do not do it again because they unbalance the nervous system and the mind. A hug from Mexico and the best for you.

 

Original post:

 

hola Alanmane, yo soy de México pero he estado muchas veces en Barcelona!, me atreví a escribirte porque mi historia es también parecida a la tuya, la marihuana y un entorno familiar tóxico detonó en mí pánico, ansiedad y depresión. Lo peor de todo fue que eso fue lo que me llevó a tomar estas drogas psiquiátricas que son una de las peores cosa que me han pasado en la vida. Me da gusto que estés dejándolas.  A mí lo que me ha ido ayudando a reducirla es un yoga en particular que se llama kundalini yoga. Hay muchas meditaciones en esta disciplina que te ayudan mucho a quererte, a retomar la seguridad en ti mismo y hay otras que te ayudan a quitarte la angustia y la depresión. En Barcelona hay muchos lugares donde puedes tomar clases de kundalini. Mi maestro es el mejor del mundo, pero está en Lleida y te queda lejos, pero puedes encontrar una academia de kundalini en la zona. Te prometo que te vas a sentir mucho mejor. Si yo hubiera encontrado esa técnica a tu edad, mi vida hubiera sido muy distinta a como ha sido pues  ya llevo 19 años tomando estas pastillas que son la peor cosa del mundo con miles de efectos secundarios horrorosos. Gracias a kundalini he logrado ir dejando el antidepresivo, es lo único que me ha ayudado en este camino. Es una herramienta poderosa. Te deseo lo mejor en tu camino para liberarte del antidepresivo y como dicen todos en este sitio, entre más lentamente dejes el antidepresivo menos mono vas a tener. Nunca vuelvas a consumir ninguna droga ilegal, no hacen bien, aunque tus amigos presionen, no lo vuelvas a hacer porque desequilibran mucho el sistema nervioso y la mente.  Un abrazo desde México y lo mejor para ti.

 

Edited August 6, 2020 by ChessieCat
added Google translation

[Alanmane]

 

Update: I am somewhat better than a few weeks ago, still it is difficult to live this way. I am still fatigued all the time, my mind is clouded many times or almost always, I don't think about anything, I don't feel that I have creativity, ideas, I forget things, I don't know what to respond to in conversations, my mind feels off and without energy.

 

This is the worst and at times I doubt that it is a WD thing and that I really am. It is day after day for many months and I am very tired. When he took a higher dose of effexor he remembered everything, he was sharp, insightful, witty, funny ... everything is gone. I feel lost, with the only certainty that I will reach 0mg and then I do not know what will happen in the next few years, if it largely depends on my character, I have it difficult since I am realizing how fearful and cowardly I can be

 

. I am not comfortable with who I am now and I have asked for it. It only remains to be attentive to improve, although being attentive is difficult right now.

[ChessieCat]

I'm not sure if I mentioned this before but I found it helpful to play games which would use my brain.  I couldn't play stimulating games, and some games I could play on one day but not on the next day.  Sometimes I could do a word puzzle (eg find a word, crossword) but could not do a sudoku puzzle (numbers).  Sometimes I could do sudoku but not a word puzzle.  Sometimes I even had trouble playing a matching game like Candy Crush or Bejewelled because my brain just didn't seem to make the connection about what I was seeing.  I had trouble doing jigsaw puzzles because my brain couldn't mentally turn the pieces around.  I've been doing number, word and jigsaw puzzles all my life but during WD it was very difficult.

 

So I would play the games that I could, or just play them as best I could.  It wasn't a competition.  I used my brain.  And gradually I found that it became easier.

 

The other thing I did was to play songs that I liked and learn the words to the songs.

 

Gradually my mental ability and my memory improved.

 

Of course, it might have been coincidence that the WD fog cleared.  But I don't know.  And playing games helped to keep my occupied and distracted and it might have helped.  From what I've heard about how the brain works I do believe that it did help.

 

I suggest that you watch these videos.  I was amazed when I saw the bicycle video.

 

Video:  The Backwards Brain Bicycle

 

Video:  The Brain That Changes Itself - Norman Doidge

 

[Alanmane]

thank you for your message Chessie, on some occasion you told me about games and exercising the brain to improve cognitive skills, it is something really useful and it is well known that you need to train in everything to be better, the video about the bicycle has shocked, it is incredible how stubborn the human brain is, I am sure that much of my problems are because of patterns and habits ingrained years ago, there is no other option but to work to change all this.

 

I think I am scared by how I feel lately, it is very different from a few months or a year ago, I did not feel good at higher doses of effexor although that gave me a higher energy level that I do not have now. I have 23 pearls left to finish the tapper, 23 out of 140 pearls that are in a 37.5mg capsule, I am practically not taking anything anymore, I hope that so much effort has served something.

[ChessieCat]

Have you just made another reduction in August?

 

Alto and I have both told you that you have been tapering too fast.  The symptoms you are getting are probably withdrawal symptoms.  If you keep tapering you might end up feeling worse.  It is better to do a long hold now instead of pushing ahead to try and get off the drug.

  

On 7/6/2020 at 8:43 AM, ChessieCat said:

I think that what you are experiencing now is because you have tapered too fast.

 

 

On 7/25/2020 at 9:40 AM, Altostrata said:

You have been tapering too fast. That was a mistake.

 

 

[Alanmane]

It is more than two years reducing, I know that according to who can be fast, for other people slow, there are people who can leave it in a matter of a few months and other people who take much longer, I think I am in the group that has to go slowly and so I keep reducing. Yes, I eliminated two pearls (from 25 to 23), I did it out of frustration and maybe because of my desire to keep moving forward until I reach the end. Nobody can assure you that I feel this bad for WD, I may be this disaster without drugs, at the end of the day I started with this at 18 and I am 28, during these ten years I will have been two or three drug free, I have also played with my brain chemistry by using marijuana and some drugs occasionally, it may now be paying for how bad I have treated myself. I'm tired of living day after day with this emptiness, without illusion, motivation, feeling that no one likes me because I don't like myself.

I'm fed up.

[ChessieCat]

As SA mods, if we see that members are tapering too fast, we suggest that they slow down.

 

I understand what it's like wanting to keep tapering.  I've been a mod here since early 2016, and recently another mod noticed that I was planning to make another reduction despite the fact that I was posting that I was experiencing withdrawal symptoms.  The other mod didn't think it was a good idea and suggested that would be better to hold for longer.  My first reaction was no, I'll keep going, but then I thought about my recent back injury and the pain I had been in, the pain drugs I had taken, as well as a tooth extraction, and a flare up of my back injury.  I had also made a reduction at the same time I originally hurt my back.  Once I assessed my situation I realised that the advice was sensible and that holding was a good idea.  That was 3 weeks ago, and I'm really pleased that I did follow the mod's suggestion because I have noticed an improvement in my symptoms.  And I've decided that I will hold for another 2 weeks, so a total of 5 weeks more than I had planned.

 

1 hour ago, Alanmane said:

It is more than two years reducing

   

Yes, you have been reducing for 2 years and that is good.  However, your starting dose was 150mg.  And you have kept tapering during that time ignoring that you had withdrawal symptoms.  Eventually it catches up with you and that is why Alto and I have suggested a long hold to allow your brain a chance to catch up.

 

Of course it is your decision if you want to keep tapering, but Alto and I, and the other mods, have followed the situations of many other members on SA and in most instances it is better to hold for longer instead of continuing to push ahead when you have withdrawal symptoms so you can get off the drug.

[Alanmane]

22 hours ago, ChessieCat said:

Como mods de SA, si vemos que los miembros disminuyen demasiado rápido, sugerimos que disminuyan la velocidad.

 

Entiendo lo que es querer seguir disminuyendo. He sido un mod aquí desde principios de 2016, y recientemente otro mod notó que estaba planeando hacer otra reducción a pesar de que estaba publicando que estaba experimentando síntomas de abstinencia. El otro mod no pensó que fuera una buena idea y sugirió que sería mejor mantenerlo por más tiempo. Mi primera reacción fue no, seguiré, pero luego pensé en mi reciente lesión en la espalda y el dolor que había tenido, los analgésicos que había tomado, así como la extracción de un diente y un brote de espalda lesión. También hice una reducción al mismo tiempo que originalmente me lastimé la espalda. Una vez que evalué mi situación, me di cuenta de que el consejo era sensato y que retener era una buena idea. Eso fue hace 3 semanas, y estoy muy contento de haber seguido el mod ' s sugerencia porque he notado una mejoría en mis síntomas. Y he decidido que aguantaré otras 2 semanas, por lo que un total de 5 semanas más de lo que había planeado.

 

   

Sí, llevas 2 años reduciendo y eso es bueno. Sin embargo, su dosis inicial fue de 150 mg. Y ha seguido disminuyendo durante ese tiempo ignorando que tenía síntomas de abstinencia. Eventualmente te alcanza y es por eso que Alto y yo hemos sugerido una retención prolongada para que tu cerebro tenga la oportunidad de ponerse al día.

 

Por supuesto, es su decisión si desea seguir disminuyendo, pero Alto y yo, y los otros mods, hemos seguido las situaciones de muchos otros miembros en SA y, en la mayoría de los casos, es mejor esperar más tiempo en lugar de seguir avanzando. cuando tiene síntomas de abstinencia para que pueda dejar el medicamento.

thanks for your message Chessie. I know very well that the best thing for me is a long retention, and that although I have 23 ridiculous pearls left I should not be in a hurry because it could spoil it more than it already is.

This is a matter of desperation and extreme anguish, feeling like rubbish day after day and losing hope, because yes, lately even though it is not something rational I feel that my mind is damaged thanks to the executive problems I have, memory, learning , retention of information, creativity ... it is VERY difficult for me to accept that I am like this (I am almost sure that these symptoms are the effect of the "depressive" state that I am living). I just don't want to suffer, the problem is that I don't feel motivated to do things that help me, I feel trapped.

The only thing I learned to cover my emotions were drugs and now that I don't have their effects I don't know how to manage my life, this is reality. Even so I will continue to go to work, to meet my friends, to do everything I can even if I feel ashamed when even my words are stuck when speaking because of anxiety and because my mind does not connect thoughts, even when I remain silent why not Nothing comes to mind to say, even when I'm sure people see me unhappy and I hate being noticed because I don't know how to pretend. I have no real problem other than WD, even maybe all this is not WD and is my way of feeling and living life, this operated and distorted by the years taking chemical garbage.

[ChessieCat]

I think that you think that you need to get off the drug to get your brain thinking again.  But because you have tapered too quickly it is probably because your brain still needs a little bit more drug OR you need to stay at the same dose for about 2 or 3 months, or even a bit longer.

 

I have already told you about my experience of reducing my drug too quickly but you may have forgotten.

 

My brain fog was caused by reducing my dose too quickly.  Once I added more drug my brain fog cleared.

 

On 11/1/2018 at 8:00 AM, ChessieCat said:

 

I will tell you about my own experience.  I had a benchmark so I knew it was because of the drug and not my imagination.

 

I was taking 100mg Pristiq and started taking 50mg.  For 3 2 weeks (checked details later) I had very bad cog/brain fog.  Even walking took all of my concentration.  At the end of the 3 2 weeks I was unable to type.  I have been a professional typist for 40+years so I knew that something was wrong.  I had joined SA a few days before this happened and they had suggested that I take extra Pristiq.  When I couldn't type I took extra Pristiq and about 4 hours later (yes only 4 hours) I was able to type again and my brain fog was clearing.

 

 

Edited August 29, 2020 by ChessieCat

[Alanmane]

On 29/8/2020 at 3:22, ChessieCat said:

Creo que piensas que necesitas dejar la droga para que tu cerebro vuelva a pensar. Pero debido a que ha disminuido demasiado rápido, probablemente se deba a que su cerebro todavía necesita un poco más de medicamento O necesita permanecer en la misma dosis durante aproximadamente 2 o 3 meses, o incluso un poco más.

 

Ya le he hablado de mi experiencia de reducir mi medicamento demasiado rápido, pero es posible que lo haya olvidado.

 

Mi confusión mental fue causada por reducir mi dosis demasiado rápido. Una vez que agregué más droga, mi niebla mental se despejó.

 

 

surely my bad condition is the cause of diminishing faster than it should, apart from my negative view of the matter. I've seen a way out, I've always relapsed and that's why I'm very likely to be so pessimistic. I don't believe in recovery because I've never experienced it. I'm really not that bad, it's not unbearable since I can continue working, tattooing, eating out, I can enjoy sex again ... still I always feel emptiness, a lack of pleasure for everything, a slow mind and little acute, a state of acute tension all the time.

Today for example I was having a coffee on a terrace and I saw someone behind me, a few meters away. My reaction was startled, the same sensation that one has when falling to the ground, all for simply perceiving a person two meters behind me.

I should definitely wait a few months before downsizing, I hope to stick with it.