Emma7855: request for help with Lamictal withdrawal symptoms

[Gridley]

37 minutes ago, Emma7855 said:

luten or sugar, since doing so might bring about its own set of withdrawal symptoms. But at this point I'm open to anything.

 

Diet and diet philosophies are so varied.  With me, I don't have a problem with gluten and don't react badly to it.   Some diet people are very opposed to it.  I would go by how you feel after eating it.  I can't eat sugar or anything sweet at all; it gives me immediate anxiety.  You're right, I wouldn't do anything drastic.  Maybe cut down a bit on the sugar if you can, since it's a common anxiety causer.  Caffeine's pretty rough on people in WD.  It would be good if you could cut down some on the junk food.  Junk food has some pretty awful ingredients, and we in withdrawal are very sensitive to things that the "nondrugged" aren't.  Some people do fine with dairy, some (like me) don't.  So I'd cut down as much as you're comfortable with on the junk food and sugar and caffeine and see if that makes you feel any better.

[Emma7855]

Hi @Altostrata - Here are two weeks' worth of notes. I stopped keeping track of things during the Thanksgiving holiday, but I'll start again today.

 

Friday, November 8th:

- 4AM: Wake up

- 6:30AM: Fall back asleep

- 7:30AM: Wake up; jaw pain

- 11:30AM: Coffee, scone

- 3PM: Bread, rice, string cheese

- 8PM: Chicken sandwich, guac and chips

- 9PM: Lamictal 37.5mg, melatonin 3mg

- 12AM: Sleep

 

Saturday, November 9th:

- 7AM: Wake up; feel sad and disconnected 

-12:30PM: Coffee, pastry

- 2PM: Feel spaced out; hard to think

- 7PM: Egg rolls, chicken pad thai, ice cream

- 8PM: Lamictal 37.5mg

- 9PM: Melatonin 3mg

-12AM: Sleep

 

Sunday, November 10th:

- 7:30AM: Wake up; feel sad and disconnected

- 10AM-4PM: Feel anxious, scared

-12PM: Eggs

- 5PM: Feel slightly better after talking things over with friends/family

- 7PM: Lamictal 37.5 mg

- 7:30PM: Pizza, caesar salad, ice cream

- 9PM: Melatonin 3mg, fish oil

- 12AM: Sleep

 

Monday, November 11th:

- 4AM: Wake up

- 4AM-7AM: Drift in and out of sleep; wake up feeling sad

- 9AM: Feel a little better

- 9:30AM: Coffee

- 1PM: String cheese, apple, marshmallows 

- 6PM: Lamictal 37.5 mg

- 8PM: Bread with peanut butter, candy

- 9PM: Melatonin 3mg

- 11:30PM: Sleep

 

Tuesday, November 12th:

- 4AM: Wake up; feel anxious

- 4:45AM: Fall back asleep

- 7:15AM: Wake up; feel anxious

- 7:45AM: Coffee

- 9AM: Feel slightly better (distracted by work)

-12PM: Pizza

- 6:30PM: Lamictal 37.5mg

- 7:30PM: Beer, sandwich 

- 8PM: Doughnut 

- 9PM: Melatonin 3mg

- 11PM: Sleep

 

Wednesday, November 13th:

- 4AM: Wake up

- 4AM-7AM: Drift in and out of sleep

- 9AM: Doctor's appointment (got flu shot); feel disoriented and confused (I believe the doctor's office exacerbated my DP/DR)

- 10AM-rest of day: Feel sad, anxious, disconnected 

- 12PM: Pizza

- 6PM: Go to boyfriend's because too upset to be left alone

- 6:30PM: Lamictal 37.5mg

- 7PM: Toast with avocado and smoked salmon, ice cream

- 9PM: Melatonin 3mg

- 10:30PM: Sleep

 

Thursday, November 14th:

- 5AM: Wake up; incredibly anxious; jaw hurts

- 6AM-7:30AM: Drift in and out of sleep

- 7:30AM: Wake up; feel anxious, tired, sick (feel this way all day); decide to take the day off from work

- 12PM: Crackers, cherry tomatoes, popcorn 

- 6PM: Lamictal 37.5mg

- 7:30PM: Toast, cherry tomatoes, ice cream

- 9PM: Melatonin 3mg

- 11PM: Sleep

 

Friday, November 15th:
- 4:30AM: Wake up; feel anxious and sad; jaw hurts

- 5:30AM-7AM: Drift in and out of sleep

- 9:30AM: Coffee, pastry

- 10AM: Feel okay

- 8PM: Caesar salad with eggs and chicken, ice cream

- 8PM: Lamictal 37.5 mg

- 9PM: Melatonin 3mg

- 11:30PM: Sleep

 

Saturday, November 16th:

- 7:30AM: Wake up; feel okay

- 11AM: Coffee, pastry

- 5PM: Lamictal 37.5mg

- 8:30PM: Salad with chicken and eggs, popcorn

- 9:30PM: Melatonin 3mg

- 12:30AM: Sleep

 

Sunday, November 17th:

- 7:30AM: Wake up; feel foggy, disconnected

-11AM: Coffee (2 cups rather than normal 1)

- 2PM: Feel anxious, foggy

- 2:30PM: Grilled cheese sandwich

- 4PM: Knit; feel a little better

- 5PM: Lamictal 37.5mg

- 7:30PM: Anxious (dreading start of work week)

- 8PM: Brussel sprouts; omelette with chicken, mushrooms, and arugula; cake

- 9:30PM: Melatonin 3mg

- 10:45PM: Sleep

 

Monday, November 18th:

- 4AM: Wake up; feel anxious, sad, and suicidal 

- 5AM: Fall back asleep

- 7:45AM: Wake up; feel groggy; jaw hurts

- 12PM-rest of day: Feel incredibly sad

- 12:30PM: Coffee

- 2PM: Scone, tea

- 4:30PM: Hazelnuts, string cheese

- 5PM: Lamictal 37.5mg

- 8PM: Omelette with mushrooms, chicken, and arugula; popcorn

- 9PM: Melatonin 3mg

- 11PM: Sleep

 

Tuesday, November 19th: 

- 4:30AM: Wake up; feel anxious and sad

- 5:30AM: Fall back asleep

-7AM: Wake up; feel anxious and sad; jaw hurts

- 9AM: Black tea, banana

- 11AM: Start to feel better (distracted by work)

- 12PM: Burrito, candy

- 6:30PM: Lamictal 37.5mg

- 7:30PM: Cured meats and crackers; salad

- 9:30PM: Melatonin 3mg

- 11PM: Sleep

 

Wednesday, November 20th: 

- 3:30AM: Wake up; feel sad

- 4:30AM-7:00AM: Drift in and out of sleep

- 7AM: Wake up; feel foggy

- 8:30AM: Coffee

- 9AM: Attend support group; feel a little better

- 12PM: Mac and cheese, candy

- 6:30PM: Lamictal 37.5mg

- 7PM: Pizza, doughnut

- 9:30PM: Melatonin 3mg

- 12AM: Sleep

 

Thursday, November 21st:

- 4AM: Wake up

- 4AM-8AM: Drift in and out of sleep

- 8AM: Wake up; jaw hurts

- 8AM-end of day: Feel sad; tinnitus is strong

- 9AM: Coffee

- 12PM: Brisket, mac and cheese, crackers, chocolate

- 7PM: Chicken quesadilla 

- 8PM: Lamictal 37.5mg

- 10:30PM: Melatonin 3mg

- 11:30PM: Sleep

- Note: Period started

 

Friday, November 22nd:

- 2:30AM: Wake up; feel incredibly sad

- 2:30AM-8AM: Drift in and out of sleep

-8AM-end of day: feel sad, can't concentrate, strong tinnitus 

- 9:30AM: Decaf coffee

- 12PM: Oatmeal, nuts, chips

- 7:30PM: Lamictal 37.5mg

- 8PM: Chicken salad, ice cream

- 9:30PM: Melatonin 3mg 

- 11PM: Sleep

[Emma7855]

Thanks, @Gridley. I'll try cutting down on the junk food, sugar, and caffeine. Do you think it's okay to drink decaf coffee? My morning coffee ritual is a guilty pleasure of mine, and it would make me pretty sad if I had to cut it out entirely. 

[Emma7855]

Hi @Guilietta - How are you doing these days? Hope you had a happy and relaxing Thanksgiving. 

[Gridley]

2 minutes ago, Emma7855 said:

Do you think it's okay to drink decaf coffee?

 

Decaf is better.  I'd give it a qualified okay.  Take this thing by stages.  B kind to yourself. 

[Emma7855]

Thanks for the words of encouragement  

[Altostrata]

Emma, all I can see from those notes is that you need to use your bite guard at night for the bruxism.

 

How has your symptom pattern changed since November 22?

[Emma7855]

Thanks, @Altostrata -- that's what I thought too. Unfortunately I've been wearing my mouth guard for a few months now, and yet I still feel jaw pain when waking up. My symptoms have continued to remain the same. Should I still try to move the Lamictal up to noon? Is there any way to tell whether it's exacerbating my symptoms (since it's a reinstatement)? If it is, should attempt to (slowly) taper it again? 

 

I'm starting to worry that my symptoms are not withdrawal-related but rather some adverse reaction that I got from a) the Klonopin itself, b) smoking some weed in June, and c) drinking alcohol in August, and that I'll never recover. To add another level of complexity, in April I went skiing and was hit in the head by another skier; I saw the doctor who said I was fine, but maybe I suffered a TBI? I can't seem to find anyone with my exact set of symptoms (and I've spent an embarrassing amount of time on this website reading people's stories):

 

- Word recalling issues (I mix up similar words that start with the same letter, I mess up common expressions, and I forget the prepositions that are used after verbs and nouns)

- I can no longer express myself well -- it's hard for me to communicate what I'm thinking

- Problems with short-term memory

- Dissociation, where I can no longer identify with myself, my friends/family all feel like strangers, and my apartment feels foreign (I don't know if this is DP/DR or something else)

- I've lost all of my OCD tendencies (nail biting, hair twirling, needing to be a perfectionist); I'm essentially a blank slate now

- My sense of time is altered; things that happened recently feel like an eternity ago

- I get disoriented very easily 

- Executive functioning issues 

- General brain fog 

- Problems processing visual information; I can't read anymore because the information is too much for my brain to handle; video games are hard because there's too much visual information on the screen

- Ears: tinnitus, sensitive to loud noises 

- Eyes: convergence insufficiency, spasm of accommodation, photosensitivity, visuospatial deficit, visual snow, palinopsia

 

Thanks for your help; I really appreciate it. 

 

 

 

[Altostrata]

5 hours ago, Altostrata said:

How has your symptom pattern changed since November 22?

 

[Emma7855]

Hi @Altostrata -- Sorry. My symptoms haven't changed since November 22nd. Other than the sadness and crying spells, which come in waves (depending upon how well I can distract myself), everything is constant, day in and day out. Thanks.

[Altostrata]

How do you feel before and after taking lamotrigine every day? When did you start feeling poorly?

[Emma7855]

@Altostrata,

 

I haven't noticed any difference before and after taking the Lamictal.

 

As for when I started feeling poorly, unfortunately the answer is complicated:

- Late June: I smoked some weed (was near the end of my Lamictal taper); woke up the next day with brain fog that hasn't gone away (haven't smoked weed since)

- Mid-July: Finished my Lamictal taper; after 3 days developed even worse brain fog, so went back on (25 mg); brain fog returned to post-weed state (but not pre-weed state)

- Mid-August: Had an alcoholic beverage (haven't had any alcohol since); the next day developed tinnitus and photophobia/palinopsia. Increased Lamictal to 50mg; a few days later developed DP/DR, bruxism, visual processing issues, and executive functioning issues. Hard to say whether the latter problems were from the alcohol or increasing the dose of Lamictal. 

- Early September: Decreased Lamictal to 37.5mg. Don't think my issues improved at all but it's possible the bruxism did slightly? I also started wearing my mouthguard so maybe the lessened bruxism is from that.

 

My dose of Lamictal consists of a whole 25mg pill and then half of another one. I use a pill splitter but I'm sure that it's not a perfect 12.5mg split (probably more like 12.5mg +/- 2mg). I wonder if that's contributing to my issues at all.

 

Thanks.

[Emma7855]

Feeling really upset tonight. Concerned that my symptoms aren't "classic withdrawal" and so must be from a traumatic brain injury that's permanent. Under the assumption at this point that I've developed early-onset dementia, for which there is no cure. Too kindled to take any meds for it. Worried about my job, about how much longer I can fake it before someone finds out and tells my boss, team, or HR. Or for that matter, how much longer I can push myself. I'm letting everyone around me down. Feeling lost and hopeless. Could really use some positive words right now. Thanks.

[sunnysideup69]

7 minutes ago, Emma7855 said:

Feeling really upset tonight. Concerned that my symptoms aren't "classic withdrawal" and so must be from a traumatic brain injury that's permanent. Under the assumption at this point that I've developed early-onset dementia, for which there is no cure. Too kindled to take any meds for it. Worried about my job, about how much longer I can fake it before someone finds out and tells my boss, team, or HR. Or for that matter, how much longer I can push myself. I'm letting everyone around me down. Feeling lost and hopeless. Could really use some positive words right now. Thanks.

 

You're going to heal. You are healing already. These thoughts are WD fuelled, interesting, because I also tend to think I must be the exception to the WD rule when I'm feeling bad. And also, I don't think there is a 'WD rule' except that we're going to have times of feeling really awful, along with times of feeling ok.

Hang on in there  

[Emma7855]

Thanks for the kind words, @sunnysideup69. I really appreciate your stopping by. 

[sunnysideup69]

4 minutes ago, Emma7855 said:

Thanks for the kind words, @sunnysideup69. I really appreciate your stopping by. 

You're welcome. Our WD brains fire off thoughts randomly. I've been watching my dark thoughts this morning. It's really common, you're not alone. Horrible when those thoughts are accompanied by symptoms, too. Wishing you some relief today / tomorrow (not sure what time it is for you, In London it's early morning 6 36am) x

[Giulietta]

Hello dear Emma

 

I am terribly sorry that you are feeling as distraught as you are.  I feel the same way - and yesterday was a bad day for me - particularly emotionally - withthe feelings you desribe (including the dementia! ) As @sunnysideup69 says we have already healed (I hae improved overall - and try to recall the windows). Still our feelings arejustified. Your feelings are real. You are not losing your mind nor am I even thogh this seems to never end and it stinks.

 

Why do you think you are getting early onset dementia? I think if we look at the symptoms objectively - we would find we don't have it. It's like the potpourri of symptoms we have. People on here (including moi) whose weaks become so weak they can't buckle underneath them - have normal nerve conduction tests! From online researrch it looks ike it is related to serotonin! Same way with tinnitus. I thuoght I was losing my hearing so went to the audiologist and ENT. Test was fine. Hearing good - I saw t he results. The dementia is another (justified) fabricated worry of our mind playing tricks on us.

 

4 hours ago, Emma7855 said:

Worried about my job, about how much longer I can fake it before someone finds out and tells my boss, team, or HR. Or for that matter, how much longer I can push myself

 

I forget what your job is and wonder if you could do a lesser job, reduce hours, work from home part-time, ? If someone reports on you - well - nothing can stop  that and you deal with it then. I'm not justifying your feelings - feelings are real - even if they are jumping to conclusions and what if'ing.   Cross the rubicon when AND if you need to.

 

Anyway sweetie - keep your chin up.

 

Hugs,

Your friend,

G.

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Giulietta]

15 hours ago, sunnysideup69 said:

Our WD brains fire off thoughts randomly.

 

I have experienced these ups and downs and ruminations and feeling normal - in a short time frame- an afternoon, etc. I have no idea why this is.

 

10 hours ago, Guilietta said:

wonder if you could do a lesser job, reduce hours, work from home part-time

 

How are oyu doing now?

 

 

I know you have had these worries in the past - and i have said something similiar in the past. Could you do another type of work that would be less impacted by WD? And earn enough money to support yourself?

 

[Altostrata]

On 12/8/2019 at 11:56 AM, Emma7855 said:

- Mid-August: Had an alcoholic beverage (haven't had any alcohol since); the next day developed tinnitus and photophobia/palinopsia. Increased Lamictal to 50mg; a few days later developed DP/DR, bruxism, visual processing issues, and executive functioning issues. Hard to say whether the latter problems were from the alcohol or increasing the dose of Lamictal. 

- Early September: Decreased Lamictal to 37.5mg. Don't think my issues improved at all but it's possible the bruxism did slightly? I also started wearing my mouthguard so maybe the lessened bruxism is from that.

 

It looks to me like maybe the 50mg Lamictal was too much and maybe 37.5mg is too much, too.

 

I might reduce to 35mg, please keep daily notes about when you take your drugs, their dosages, and your symptoms. Very important to do this daily during drug changes.

[Emma7855]

Thanks so much, @Altostrata. I'll start tapering after the holidays are over. I recently saw a highly rated psychiatrist who specializes in addictions; he suggested trying a small dose of Trileptal, since it's a mood stabilizer that could potentially calm my nervous system. The only problem is that I'm not sure what constitutes a "small dose" -- is it the usual starting dose of 300 mg? 1/50 of that, or 6 mg? When you were taking 0.5 mg of Lamictal, how did you know whether that dose was right and how long to stay on it? Thanks for your help.

[Emma7855]

Hello dear @Guilietta -- I hope the holidays are treating you well. Thanks so much for your kind message, and I'm sorry it's taken me so long to get back to you -- I try not to spend too much time on here; otherwise, I start to get even more upset! I'm sure you understand. 

 

I'm concerned about early-onset dementia for a few reasons... 1. I do have some hearing loss in both ears, which accompanies the tinnitus. 2. I forget words, phrases, people's names, general information, etc. constantly. I can't speak or write a single sentence without struggling to finish it in some way. I find that I'm much less eloquent than I used to be. 3. Unless I'm actively thinking, my mind is blank. I don't have random thoughts or background noise. Just eery, disconcerting nothingness. I can't hold conversations or write anymore because I have nothing to say. 4. I've lost a lot of my memories, both old and recent. It's like I've developed amnesia. 5. I've forgotten a lot about myself, like what I used to enjoy, how I used to think, my fears, my aspirations, how I used to interact with family and friends, essentially what made me "me." 6. I don't have a single window. It's just a constant wave, one hour after the next.

 

Does that all make sense?

 

Concerning my job, I really don't know what to do. At this point I'm inclined to ask for a 3-month leave so that I can move back home with my parents and focus on my recovery, away from life's and work's stressors. I'm just concerned that 3 months won't be enough -- what would I do after that? I'm scared to think about it but at the same time I know I can't continue like this forever.

 

How are you doing these days?

 

❤️ Emma

[Emma7855]

How are you doing, @sunnysideup69? Happy holidays!

[Sassenach]

Hi Emma

 

1 hour ago, Emma7855 said:

I do have some hearing loss in both ears, which accompanies the tinnitus. 2. I forget words, phrases, people's names, general information, etc. constantly. I can't speak or write a single sentence without struggling to finish it in some way. I find that I'm much less eloquent than I used to be. 3. Unless I'm actively thinking, my mind is blank. I don't have random thoughts or background noise. Just eery, disconcerting nothingness. I can't hold conversations or write anymore because I have nothing to say. 4. I've lost a lot of my memories, both old and recent. It's like I've developed amnesia. 5. I've forgotten a lot about myself, like what I used to enjoy, how I used to think, my fears, my aspirations, how I used to interact with family and friends, essentially what made me "me

All the above are included in " WD normal "

 

It does not mean you have early onset dementia.

You have put your body through a roller coaster ride this year and it will take a long while to settle.

1 hour ago, Emma7855 said:

I recently saw a highly rated psychiatrist who specializes in addictions; he suggested trying a small dose of Trileptal

If he realy knew his job he would have suggested a suitable dose.

I would suggest you do not begin another med which could further upset you CNS.

Definitely wait for @Altostrata advice.

1 hour ago, Emma7855 said:

Concerning my job, I really don't know what to do. At this point I'm inclined to ask for a 3-month leave so that I can move back home with my parents and focus on my recovery, away from life's and work's stressors. I'm just concerned that 3 months won't be enough -- what would I do after that? I'm scared to think about it but at the same time I know I can't continue like this forever.

If this is a viable option, take it as long your parents understand what you are going through, I would take it.

Any form of stress can prolong recovery.

No one can predict 3 months time, W/D or not.

We have to take it day by day.

 

Sassenach

[sunnysideup69]

3 hours ago, Emma7855 said:

How are you doing, @sunnysideup69? Happy holidays!

Hey there! I'm doing OK, ups and downs, last week was great, this week a bit bumpy. Forcing myself to socialise a bit or else I'd just hide away. How are you? Happy holidays to you, too, and may 2020 bring us all even more healing than we thought possible 😊

[Altostrata]

What makes you think you don't have "classic withdrawal syndrome"? Your symptoms look drug-related to me.

 

Most likely, going off Klonopin cold-turkey is the source of your problems, compounded by premature decreases in Lamictal.

 

All of your symptoms are very typical for psychiatric drug withdrawal syndrome. It can take many months to recover from it.

 

3 hours ago, Emma7855 said:

Thanks so much, @Altostrata. I'll start tapering after the holidays are over. I recently saw a highly rated psychiatrist who specializes in addictions; he suggested trying a small dose of Trileptal, since it's a mood stabilizer that could potentially calm my nervous system. The only problem is that I'm not sure what constitutes a "small dose" -- is it the usual starting dose of 300 mg? 1/50 of that, or 6 mg? When you were taking 0.5 mg of Lamictal, how did you know whether that dose was right and how long to stay on it? Thanks for your help.

 

This psychiatrist wants you to take Trileptal with Lamictal? What if your symptoms are from the Lamictal?

 

Lamictal and Trileptal are both anti-seizure drugs that do the same thing, although they are chemically different and work a little differently: They make the nervous system less reactive.

 

Trileptal doesn't have any special magic. This doctor wants to swap drugs because you are not satisfied with Lamictal. He works by trial and error.

 

On 12/11/2019 at 4:53 PM, Altostrata said:

 

It looks to me like maybe the 50mg Lamictal was too much and maybe 37.5mg is too much, too.

 

I might reduce to 35mg, please keep daily notes about when you take your drugs, their dosages, and your symptoms. Very important to do this daily during drug changes.

 

Depending on your symptom pattern, you may wish to reduce or divide your dose of Lamictal, which may reduce adverse effects such as tinnitus, bruxism, and foggy brain. Lamictal is often taken twice a day.

 

You also need to take Lamictal consistently. I can see from the notes you posted that you didn't keep to a strict schedule. Also, you were to move Lamictal earlier in the day, theoretically this can reduce the bruxing.

 

We still need to see your daily notes of drug intake and symptom pattern.

[Emma7855]

Thanks for your help, @Sassenach and @Altostrata. Thanks for the reassurance that I'm experiencing 'normal' WD, but I still get paranoid that I caused permanent damage to my brain. The reason why I originally went on Lamictal and Prozac in 2015 was because I developed some photosensitivity, DP/DR, and brain fog after trying some recreational drugs; the meds were supposed to reduce the severity of my symptoms, but I don't think they ever did anything to that effect. I ended up just learning to live with them. Now with my current Klonopin/Lamictal withdrawal, these same symptoms have gotten dramatically worse, and I've developed quite a few more. If I never recovered after my 2015 bender, then what's to say that I'll recover now? 

 

@Altostrata, I'll go ahead and reduce my dose of Lamictal to 35 mg. I have 25 mg normal pills and 5 mg chewable pills. Should I take one 25 mg pill and two 5 mg pills at night? Or the two 5 mg pills in the morning and the 25 mg pill at night? How long should I stay at 35 mg? Thanks again.

[Emma7855]

On 12/24/2019 at 2:24 PM, sunnysideup69 said:

Hey there! I'm doing OK, ups and downs, last week was great, this week a bit bumpy. Forcing myself to socialise a bit or else I'd just hide away. How are you? Happy holidays to you, too, and may 2020 bring us all even more healing than we thought possible 😊

 

Cheers to that!

[Altostrata]

10 minutes ago, Emma7855 said:

I have 25 mg normal pills and 5 mg chewable pills. Should I take one 25 mg pill and two 5 mg pills at night? Or the two 5 mg pills in the morning and the 25 mg pill at night? How long should I stay at 35 mg?

 

I would take 10mg in the morning and 25mg 12 hours later, at night. You can start by taking 35mg in the evening for a week, see the effect of that. If it's okay, I'd move 5mg to the morning tomorrow with 30mg in the evening for a week, then move another 5mg to the morning.

 

We need to see how you do. Please keep daily drug and symptom notes throughout this process.

[Emma7855]

Okay, thanks @Altostrata. Just so I'm clear:

 

- Week 1: 35 mg at night

- Week 2: 30 mg at night, 5 mg in morning

- Week 3: 25 mg at night, 10 mg in morning

 

Is that right?

[Altostrata]

Yes, we need to see the effect of the reduction to 35mg first, before moving doses around.

[Emma7855]

@Altostrata Thanks so much. I'll keep daily notes and update you accordingly. 

[Emma7855]

Friday, December 27th
- 8 AM: Wake up; feel sad and anxious
- 8-9:30 AM: Fall back asleep
- 10 AM: Coffee
- 11 AM: Walk with parents; cry

- 4 PM: Family reunion; feel a little better
- 8 PM: Lamictal 25 mg regular + 10 mg chewable (first day of this)
- 11:30 PM: Melatonin 3 mg
- 1 AM: Sleep

 

Saturday, December 28th
- 8 AM: Wake up; feel sad, jaw hurts, strong visual snow and tinnitus, brain fog, pain in throat (feel like I'm about to become sick)
- 9 AM: Coffee
- 3 PM: Talk with parents about my future; feel upset and sad
- 7 PM: Dinner
- 8 PM: Lamictal 25 mg regular + 10 mg chewable
- 10:30 PM: Melatonin 3 mg
- 11 PM: Sleep

 

Sunday, December 29th: 
- 6 AM: Wake up; feel anxious and sad
- 8 AM: Fall back asleep
- 9:30 AM: Wake up; feel anxious and sad; jaw hurts
- 10 AM: Coffee

 

@Altostrata, I've been reflecting on my symptoms over the past few days (then again, when do I not?), and I'm starting to think that I developed the DP/DR the same day that I also developed the photophobia, palinopsia, and tinnitus (aka, day after I had some alcohol with a friend in mid-August, and day before I increased the Lamictal from 25 mg to 50 mg) -- that's the first day that I *didn't* wake up with anxiety, and I haven't since then. I think it just took me a few days to realize that I felt disconnected. As for increasing the Lamictal, I think the only thing that did was bring about the bruxism. Do you still think that decreasing my Lamictal is the way to go? Thanks again.

[Altostrata]

Do you feel any different, now that you're taking 35mg?

[Emma7855]

No, but then again this is only the 2nd full day on 35 mg. How long should it theoretically take for me to notice a change? Maybe I have to go completely off the Lamictal for things to improve? Or maybe I'll be in withdrawal no matter the dose. Sigh.

[Emma7855]

Hi @Altostrata -- Sorry, should have pinged you in my earlier comment: 

 

Quote

No, but then again this is only the 2nd full day on 35 mg. How long should it theoretically take for me to notice a change? Maybe I have to go completely off the Lamictal for things to improve? Or maybe I'll be in withdrawal no matter the dose. Sigh.

 

Also, this might be a silly question, but is there any chance that I caused something other than withdrawal by mixing the Lamictal with weed in June, and then Lamictal with alcohol in August? Is there a chance that I damaged my neurons, and that they won't repair themselves or grow back? I've heard of people getting permanent brain fog from weed -- could this be something similar? Sorry for the paranoia. 

 

Sunday, December 29th
- 6 AM: Wake up; feel anxious and sad
- 8 AM: Fall back asleep
- 9:30 AM: Wake up; feel anxious and sad; jaw hurts; heart racing
- 10 AM: Coffee
- 12:30 PM: Lunch; feel anxious 

- 8 PM: Lamictal 25 mg regular + 10 mg chewable
- 8:30 PM: Dinner; good mood
- 9:30 PM: Melatonin 3 mg
- 1:30 AM: Sleep

 

Monday, December 30th
- 8 AM: Wake up; feel okay
- 10 AM: Coffee
- 1 PM: Lunch
- 2:30 PM: Do work; feel okay
- 6:30 PM: Dinner
- 8 PM: Lamictal 25 mg regular + 10 mg chewable
- 9:30 PM: Melatonin 3 mg
- 12:30 AM: Sleep

 

Tuesday, December 31st
- 5:30 AM: Wake up, anxious about going back to work
- 5:30-9:30 AM: In and out of sleep
- 9:30 AM: Wake up; feel groggy and out of it

[Altostrata]

It takes about 4 days for a Lamictal dosage change to take full effect. Looks like you're doing better.

 

Too much melatonin can cause grogginess in the morning.

 

Alcohol doesn't go well with withdrawal. Marijuana is unpredictable. Best not to take any chances with psychoactive substances.

 

You haven't irreversibly damaged neurons. The nervous system is a complex web that can be thrown off-balance by psychotropics. It takes time to re-establish normal communication routes.