lexhex

[lexhex]

Mornings are a nightmare here too. My guess is once we start sleeping better, this will lessen over time. I wish everyone out there suffering with this a speedy recovery. I'm in withdrawal infancy right now and could really use some positive thought.

 

 

PLEASE NOTE: This post was moved from "I.Hate.Cortisol.Mornings", hence the discontinuity of content. -Jemima

[Barbarannamated]

Mornings are a nightmare here too. My guess is once we start sleeping better, this will lessen over time. I wish everyone out there suffering with this a speedy recovery. I'm in withdrawal infancy right now and could really use some positive thought.

 

Lexhex (love the name!),

 

Welcome to the group. When you feel up to it, start a topic in Introductions http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/forum/3-introductions-and-updates/ with your info. You'll receive alot of individual guidance and support by the very knowledgeable Admin and moderators.

 

Go slow and it does get easier!

 

B

[Jemima]

Lexhex, I've moved your post here since it's your first one. Please use this section to introduce yourself, and if you feel up to it, put the details of your drug use and withdrawal in your signature, like so:

 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/893-please-put-your-withdrawal-history-in-your-signature/

 

Welcome to the forum. You'll find lots of support and information here to help.

[lexhex]

Hi all,

 

New to the forum, found so much information here that at least I know I'm not alone. I am 46 yeras old. My first experience with any type of psychiatric drug was Klonopin for panic attacks. I took the drug as directed for 4 months and developed such paradoxical reactions to it that I had to go into a treatment center to get off it safely. The addiction specialist I was assigned to recommended Lexapro once I was about 6 months out from the Klonopin incident. I remained on Lex consistently varying the doses between 5 and 15 mg for about 6 years. Primarily, I was on 10mg unless I was having a rough patch, or wanted a break from the sexual side effects. In July of this year, I decided I wanted to be clear of the drug and I did a fairly rapid taper. Initially, I was irritable, short tempered and high strung, but nothing crazy until the last week of July when I had a MASSIVE panic attack in my car on my way home from a restaurant. My heart was racing so fast I thought I was going to die in the car. At that point, I realized I came off the Lex too fast and I tried to reinstate at the full 10 mg dose. The second dose I took sent me into full blown withdrawal. I immediately lost my appetite, had constant heart palpitations, insomnia, diarrhea, EXTREME anxiety and all over body buzzing, and had a resurgence of agoraphobia that I still can't shake. I went to a psychiatrist a week later who tried to reinstate me at a lower dose, but the same thing happened. I was taking beta blockers just to get the heart rate under control. So I said, no more. I decided that the up and down was too much for my already shattered nervous system and have remained without the drug since August 21. I still cannot sleep, digestiion is a challenge, I am sensitive to noise, light, stress of any kind and feel like I am a stranger in a body that is completely out of control. I take .25 mg of Melatonin to help with the sleep, but the REM nightmares wake me up every two hours. Overall, this has been as much fun as the benzo withdrawal was. I only hope time is the answer. I'm exhausted, fatigued and often terrified. But here I am.

[Altostrata]

I am sorry you're going through this, lexhex.

 

Yes, time is the healer. We can suggest some things to cope with the symptoms, but there is no silver bullet, as you might have suspected.

 

You might find blocking out light from your bedroom and turning down lights after nightfall lessens your nervous system overstimulation, see Important topics about symptoms, including sleep problems

 

The psychiatrist who tried to reinstate a low dose -- did he or she recognize you had withdrawal syndrome? Was it this psychiatrist who prescribed beta blockers? Are you still taking them?

[lexhex]

No, the psychiatrist really didn't address the withdrawal. He seemed to me to be a glorified prescription writer. My GP gave me the beta blockers at my request. I take between 5 and 10 mg only when needed, which is maybe once a week or so if the racing is too much for me to deal with. Or if I know I have to be in the car for extended time periods. The agoraphobia is an issue. The car is a trigger. I blacked out the windows in the bedroom which helps with the sleep, and because its fall, I have the benefit of extended darkness and shorter days. I just wish I could feel like myself again. This has forced me to check out of my own life and I hate how it's taken over everything. Thank you for the support. It helps.

[Pandora]

I feel for you, Lexhex. I was also hexed by Lexapro, tapered too fast off adjustments of 20-30 mg per day for about 2 yrs. Among other so-called mood stabilizers, and a previous 10 year "therapy" on Celexa. I am a new member and at this point can only offer you compassion and empathy for your plight. I believe in what the others are saying, that it will pass with time, that every new day is movement forward out of this maw of awful symptoms.

 

It's good to see that although you're feeling like hell, you haven't lost your creativity with the name you chose:)

 

Pandora

[lexhex]

Hey Alto, quick question - if I wanted to reinstate the Lexapro at microdoses, what is the best way to approach this? Trying to do 2.5 milligrams back in August sent me into a hypersensitive adrenaline state that I'm still battling now. How do I get to teeny-tiny doesing that my body will barely notice until I can bring it back up and stabilize?

 

Any thoughts would be appreciated...

[Altostrata]

Hi, lex. I just saw your post and moved it here.

 

If you want to take a dose smaller than 2.5mg, use the liquid and the tiny .5mL or 1.0mL oral syringe. They can measure .01mL-.02mL.

 

I suspect, though, you are going to be hypersensitive to any amount.

[Petunia]

Hi lexhex,

I noticed a recent post you made in the symptoms section, part of it here:

 

...Now I can't take ANYTHING. I kindle with any introduction of an SSRI or related med. Essentially, I am screwed and I've had to deal not only with acute and protracted withdrawal, but also the resurgence of all the symptoms with only intermittent relief. I self talk 24-7 and I never feel in control.

 

 

I'm sorry you have had a return of symptoms, your signature suggests you recovered about a year ago.  When did the symptoms return?  Was it just a temporary wave or are you still having them?

[WiggleIt]

lexhex,

 

Did anything happen to cause your problems to reactivate?  I'm very curious about your story because it sounded like you had recovered.  I'm scared that your problems came back.