abricots: Withdrawing from 30 years of "low dose" SSRI -looking for local help

[abricots]

zoloft 1974-1997. Wellbutrin 1997-2008 ?150mg XL?. lexapro 5mg 2008- 2023. Vyvanse 30mg qd 2008-2023. Went off lexapro with 1/4 tablet taper over one month. Then D/Ced vyvanse over 4 days. Rough 2.5 months; emotionally labile and feeling bad; hit the wall fatigue. Some improvement most weeks. Started to realize the siege was too painful to sit through. 10 weeks after D/C re-instated ¼ tab [1.25mg] lexapro. Return to OK, but major memory and learning deficits.

 

My prescribing MD could only offer returning to 5mg lexapro and given the breadth of new symptoms, he named new diagnoses, foresaw additional new medication, also planned to refer me to local MDs doing Ketamine therapy. Only at this point did I start to educate myself and find out about anti-depressant withdrawal syndrome. From Inner Compass to an armlong list of scholarly articles. I for some reason I could not figure out how to get started on this site, and my initial posting of this history sat on the side.

 

I stabilized, and though fragile, after about a month, began a successful slow taper 5% every two weeks. Felt better as time passed. Around 1.05mg, had two weeks of low-grade anxiety and then sudden full blown withdrawal symptoms recurred. Holiday stress and darkness? though light therapy did not help at all. Doing meditation, daily exercise without improvement.

 

Using all psychic energy I could muster to get through the days. Increasing dose by 5% approx. every 3 days did not help. Tried using AM and then multiple daily doses to treat symptoms, given the pharmacology of lexapro. Up to 3+mg without reliable or full relief. Trial of 2.5mg was suggested; blew my head off, could not think, overstimulated, until about 2-3PM. Reached out everywhere online and local MD. A kind person on the Inner Compass site gave some support, and I landed on a dose of 2mg. where I have again stabilized.

 

Multiple psychiatrists did not have knowledge, and one labelled my insistence on the withdrawal symptoms as psychotic. Still fragile and looking for a local guide in SF Bay Area going forward. Forcing myself to post since I cannot find a way to otherwise contact Altostrata directly. I am happy to share my experience going forward, but my priority at the moment is finding local in-person support for this withdrawal process. I am a woman in her mid-seventies.

 

drug signature:

zoloft 1974-1997 Wellbutrin 1997-2008 ?150mgXL?

Lexapro 5mg 2008- 2023. Vyvanse 30mg qd 2008-June 2023.

lexapro 1.25mg to 1.05mg using q 2 week 5% taper Aug-December 2023

lexapro 1.2mg-3.8mg [divided] Dec 2023-Jan 2024

Lexapro 2mg Jan 2024-

 

Edited February 10 by Altostrata
added paragraph breaks

[Altostrata]

Hello, @abricots Please explain more about what happened in 2023. To help us out, follow these instructions Please summarize your drug and withdrawal history in your signature You may need to use a computer to do this.

 

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