How much should I push myself? Good sense from Baylissa (Bliss) Frederick

[Altostrata]

Bliss led the Recovery Road withdrawal support organization in the UK for many years. This was recently posted on Facebook, reposted with Bliss's permission.

 

This is the link to the resources on her current website:  https://baylissa.com/withdrawal-resources/

 

Check out the other areas of the website from the drop down arrow top right of the page Welcome.

 

______________________________________________________________

 

 

The question is "Should I push myself physically or not to support my recovery?"

 

 

This is a brilliant question and one I have asked myself many times over the
years. The conclusion I have come to is that both schools of thought are
relevant and applicable based on the individual's situation - i.e. intensity
of symptoms, history/pre-existing problems.

For example, I always encourage people to do as much as possible in terms of
normal daily routines like getting out of bed, wearing regular clothes, etc.
things that will help to make them feel as close to normal as possible.

I also agree with you and think that avoiding stress is very important. In
addition, there are certain things that I discourage people from doing
because I've had so many reports of them causing flare-ups and funnily
enough, this includes vacuuming! Add to that mowing the lawn, drilling and
anything else that causes vibrations. So if the symptoms are extreme, I will
suggest cutting these activities out along with caffeine, alcohol and the
other culprits.

If the person has a history of agoraphobia, it is good if s/he can get into
the habit of venturing out - baby steps. usually starting with maybe just a
short walk down the street or even just sitting outside, and then adding a
bit more.

One thing I use as a guide is when the person starts to complain of being
"bored". Usually in acute withdrawal it is difficult to do much because the
symptoms are so intense and trying to cope means there is no room for
boredom. But as the person begins to feel better, the natural inclination is
to do more. If nothing is done, boredom will creep in. So once I hear the
word "bored" I usually suggest doing some activity - finding a hobby, going
for walks, sitting in the park, etc.

Anything stressful, strenuous or uncomfortable should be avoided, especially
early on as mentioned before. I do think it is important to start doing more
as time passes and the healing becomes evident. But it should be an activity
that promotes wellness like yoga, tai chi, gentle walking, learning a new
hobby like water colour painting or anything that will soothe rather than
stress. Then, in time, more can be done.

Some people are able to do a lot and this keeps them motivated. Exercise is
great for depression and anxiety but I have seen rigorous exercise land
people in bed. Some people are able to walk long distances and some go to
the gym or swim. But for those with symptoms that won't allow this, it's
best to wait.

Usually, the body will let us know when we do too much. I think the
vacuuming is not something you should be doing yet. You didn't have anxiety
or social problems before and so I think as you begin to feel better you
will effortlessly become more active and involved. So don't be too hard on
yourself. Give yourself time. If you begin to feel stuck, then by all means
do more, but if you find you have flare ups in response to some activities,
if I were you, I would wait before trying them again.

I hope this all makes sense. Take good care. Love, Baylissa xxx
 

Edited November 2, 2021 by ChessieCat
added Baylissa website link and removed link to Recovery Road

[Petunia]

Thank you for posting this Alto, its very helpful.  I can see where I have made some mistakes in trying to do things before I was ready.  I tried to start a hobby long before any feelings of boredom, based on advice about hobbies being good.  But my new hobby very quickly became a source of frustration, disappointment, confusion and more stress, both times, first with the crocheting and then with painting.

 

The information about chores which cause vibrations also provided insight, I can manage to vacuum for a few minutes with my small handheld, but when I try and use my large upright, there is an immediate increase in symptoms and I'm forced to stop. I never understood this.  This also explains why I had so much trouble after I was using the electric grass trimmer last year.

[Nadia]

Great post... this for me has been one of the biggest questions in recovery!

As I was just telling someone today, I think what helped me most was thinking of it as a physical injury. If you sprained your ankle, you wouldn't run a marathon on it. But neither would you keep it immobilized for too long, or you would not recover!

 

We are often taught in exercise classes, pilates, yoga, martial arts, etc. to differentiate between "good pain" and "bad pain"... for example, the difference between the pain of a healthy stretch and the pain of pulling a muscle. If we learn to listen to the signals, we can progress gradually, pushing ourselves to handle more and more as we recover. Being patient with our minds and bodies as we have setbacks.

 

With withdrawal, we need to "recalibrate" our sense of what we can handle. Other people might find our limits ridiculous, but you need to learn to both not cower away from challenging yourself AND to defend and respect your real limits.

 

Sometimes with anxiety that was particularly hard for me. Was it fear making me think I should avoid something I would actually feel better if I did do? Or was I up against a real limit? I think I'm often still figuring out the right balance. Sometimes I think I'm ready for something and I realize I'm not (like watching violent TV series). Other times I thought I couldn't handle something and once I did it I was fine (like driving even if I felt extremely anxious about it).

 

It helps to keep in mind that even if you have a setback, it won't be the end of the world (even if it feels like it sometimes!).

[dekiru]

Thanks for posting this, Alto. It's really helpful.

[historygal]

Recovery and Renewal book- Your essential guide...  by Baylissa Frederick

 

In my research not just about the Gupta programme I found this very helpful book which I would like to share. This lady is amazing she survived protracted withdrawal from Benzo tranquilisers for years. After her horrific ordeal she then decided to take a degree and become a qualified counsellor. Baylissa also set up a charity called Recovery Road In Britain for those suffering Benzo withdrawal as well as Antidepressant withdrawal. The charity deals with calls of withdrawal all the time and through this she has documented peoples symptoms and experiences. Her book describes her journal entries throughout her period of Acute, post acute and protracted withdrawal. Intertwined in this is actual medical information certified by Doctors in Britain (all of which you can Google) which explains in simple terms the process of withdrawal. It is also a self help book explaining duration and recovery times which actually has helped me to come to terms with my own WD. Baylissa explains that the usual natural outcome is recovery but it could take months, years. If you are over exerting yourself drinking alcohol or taking supplements it can all help to blight your recovery.The book all explains about natural alternatives to self help such as Meditation, mindfulness, sunshine boxes, exercise and various other techniques which help to cope with the symptoms. This truly is an amazing book it has sections about employment, friends and family, how to cope with Doctors. its a very informative book and all her knowledge is from her own experience as well as her work with the Charity. In Britain she won a very high court case against a tabloid newspaper who claimed she was blighted by the Benzo drug, but this accusation was false. Baylissa has also helped to campaign and lobby our parliament about Doctors being dismissive about WD. Although, she suffered with benzo WD, the interesting thing to note is that both AD withdrawal and Benzo Withdrawal have the same symptoms, as I read her story a lot of her symptoms I had experienced, although our stories are inevitably different and that is an important point that she makes, is we have to stop looking for someone else who has the same set of symptoms (me included) WD is a very unique journey with varying timelines and recovery processes. I have had the pleasure of emailing her my story and she wrote back and was concerned about me. Every now and then she writes an email, which is great as she is a very busy lady, she genuinely is now devoting her life to educating people about WD. Give it a try, its not too expensive

Edited March 31, 2019 by Altostrata
added title of book

[Petunia]

Bumping a good thread.

 

 This also explains why I had so much trouble after I was using the electric grass trimmer last year.

 

Update:  I can now use my grass trimmer for about 15 minutes at a time without it adding to symptoms.

[mammaP]

That's great news Petu  

[Barbarannamated]

Very interesting about vacuuming. That's one thing I do almost daily as I live in a dusty rural area.

 

On another note.... I had one day about 2 weeks ago that I felt able to run a lot of errands that took several hours. I felt very accomplished and thought I'd sleep great because I tired myself out physically, but it had the extreme opposite effect. I've had some of the worst sleep since then...as if my body got revved up and won't calm down. (May have overdone Fish Oil during that time also).

 

So many Catch-22 paradoxes in all of this.

[picchy]

This is all so similar to ME/CFS it's incredible. I've spent years managing my ME symptoms in the same way, pacing myself, avoiding pushing myself.

[crazykatie]

That's for the post. Very insightful for me!!

[tntd]

I see this post if very old so I don't know if anyone will respond but I want to say that I experienced this. I vacuumed and my anxiety went through the roof. Now I don't know how long to wait until I can vacuum, mow the lawn, etc. How far into recover do we need to be before doing these things won't trigger us?

[ChessieCat]

Bumping this topic.  I had never seen it and I've been a member for 6 years.

[tsranga]

Wow.. thanks for bumping this one..  Now I can see why turning on my blender, hearing the leaf blower these days triggers my fight/flight sometimes.

[tsranga]

On 6/1/2014 at 10:14 AM, Altostrata said:

If the person has a history of agoraphobia, it is good if s/he can get into
the habit of venturing out - baby steps. usually starting with maybe just a
short walk down the street or even just sitting outside, and then adding a
bit more.

 

@Altostrata Have you heard from anyone experiencing the opposite.. like not wanting to be indoors, but comfortable outdoors (as long as it is not airports or shopping malls)? 

 

It appears that sensory triggers, mostly about lack/excess air,  lack/excess noise, lack/excess light, lack/excess smell can  cause a fight/flight reaction that makes one want to get out of the house..  Fortunately the episodes have reduced greatly, but they still catch me by surprise like today..    I woke up feeling highly sensitive to sound (could hear my set top box which I haven't heard in a while, and then was triggered with fear by my spouse walking around (she had returned from a week long business trip)..   Fortunately, I was able to prevent going into an emotional/thought spiral, and breathing helped me get back on track..  

 

Have no idea what could have triggered it  - weather is the usual culprit (the storm/rain today), which then affects the gut-brain axis and circulation to the extremities (really cold feet today)..  usually things get better in the evening... 

 

[Altostrata]

There are lots of people with withdrawal syndrome who like to be outdoors.

[Heath]

This topic is awesome! Everyone that commented has very good attributes to the subject. This is something every withdrawal suffer deals with. One comment that stood out for me was Nadia. We have to listen to our body which is hard to do in our current struggle. Different stages of recovery require different actions. And we are all different. 
 

There have been times in heavy withdrawal that I need calmness alone and other times the nuroemotions telling me not to go out with friends and you can’t do this or that - then when I finally did I felt so much better! Both helped me staying in with rest and staying busy. But at different times. It’s a gradual thing. 

[ChessieCat]

I've just added the following to Post #1;

 

This is the link to the resources on her current website:  https://baylissa.com/withdrawal-resources/

 

Check out the other areas of the website from the drop down arrow top right of the page Welcome.

[Fightinghard]

This is a great topic and one that is so appropriate for me today!  Recently I’ve had this feeling like I don’t want to be home. Just busy. Sitting In is not for me which considering last June I couldn’t leave my office is a big change.   Distracting from the bad feelings, etc. my driving has been so much better where I can now drive most places fairly easily at least within my local area. So yesterday I decided to drive to the airport and walk Around.  It’s probably 30 minutes each way. I did ok. I get symptoms driving but nothing out of the ordinary. In the Past few weeks I’ve been able to attend my kids volleyball games and several other larger venue events and I manage ok. Not symptom free.  Yesterday I really pushed probably too far.  I’m in a wave today (starting last night) where I woke up at 1 am and hardly slept. I’m very ‘sensitive’ right now.   Simple things are uncomfortable that Haven’t been. Fortunately I don’t have a bunch to do today so I can lay low. Just pick up groceries.  I’m still much better than my worst months ago but waves are hard.  I’ll probably go to a park later and sit in the shade and meditate. I do believe to some degree we need to do things to keep our nervous system healing. But not too much. Usually after A hard ‘good’ day I have a bad day the next.  Last Thursday I had my first almost clear window. That was after a really hard Wednesday (Tuesday was lunch out with my wife plus a volleyball game and school pick ups, etc.).  So I’m seeing this pattern. I do well one day, overdo it and then have a wave for a day or so. I’ve had several healed people tell me the same thing; do everything you can.   Don’t hold back too much.  I’m doing that but wisely.  No need to do things I don’t need to (like the airport).  But as long as I feel ok driving I’ll go to the store and spend a few minutes trying things. 

[Heath]

@rebeccaannxo I’m sorry you are going through this fatigue. There a lot of members that have struggled with this. Iam tapering slow and I feel it when standing up sometimes and sometimes I walk around feeling like a 100 year old man. The getting up feels like achy sore body. Sometimes I feel out of breath and no stamina. These come and go. 
aurorax comes to mind she is a member has struggled with what you describe. And there are many more. 
to find them use your search engine like google. Type in fatigue surviving antidepressants and hit enter. 

 

aurorax-severe-protracted-paxil-withdrawal-finally-free

 

Edited May 11, 2022 by ChessieCat
changed quote to link

[Heath]

@rebeccaannxoVision problems and unbalanced are definitely part of wd. Just search what you are looking for and surviving antidepressants in search engine.