btdt Posted June 3, 2015 Share Posted June 3, 2015 Ok I know this is not my thing really but drug reactions are my thing as I have them a lot... if you were having a drug reaction to the antibiotic post paxil... I did not have reactions like this before i quit effexor now I react to a lot of drugs... so many I try to be very careful. If the anxiety was caused by the antibiotic it can take some time for a reaction like this to go away on its own one of the longest most noticeable reactions I had was to lidocaine which lasted for 3 months with symptoms affecting my eyesight and walking.... I kind of leaned to one side and walked to one side these months. So it can take some time for the reaction to go away it is not like it stops once you stop taking the drug sometimes they have to wear off. With any luck by the time you get the ativan sorted and tapered any of that reaction will have passed too... Nothing is simple anymore that is what I am learning... I hope the 4 doses a day every 6 hours sorts this out for you. I wish you peace. WARNING THIS WILL BE LONG Had a car accident in 85 Codeine was the pain med when I was release from hosp continuous use till 89 Given PROZAC by a specialist to help with nerve pain in my leg 89-90 not sure which year Was not told a thing about it being a psych med thought it was a pain killer no info about psych side effects I went nuts had hallucinations. As I had a head injury and was diagnosed with a concussion in 85 I was sent to a head injury clinic in 1990 five years after the accident. I don't think they knew I had been on prozac I did not think it a big deal and never did finish the bottle of pills. I had tests of course lots of them. Was put into a pain clinic and given amitriptyline which stopped the withdrawal but had many side effects. But I could sleep something I had not done in a very long time the pain lessened. My mother got cancer in 94 they switched my meds to Zoloft to help deal with this pressure as I was her main care giver she died in 96. I stopped zoloft in 96 had withdrawal was put on paxil went nutty quit it ct put on resperidol quit it ct had withdrawal was put on Effexor... 2years later celexa was added 20mg then increased to 40mg huge personality change went wild. Did too fast taper off Celexa 05 as I felt unwell for a long time prior... quit Effexor 150mg ct 07 found ****** 8 months into withdrawal learned some things was banned from there in 08 have kept learning since. there is really not enough room here to put my history but I have a lot of opinions about a lot of things especially any of the drugs mentioned above. One thing I would like to add here is this tidbit ALL OPIATES INCREASE SEROTONIN it is not a huge jump to being in chronic pain to being put on an ssri/snri and opiates will affect your antidepressants and your thinking. As I do not update much I will put my quit date Nov. 17 2007 I quit Effexor cold turkey. http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1096-introducing-myself-btdt/ There is a crack in everything ..That's how the light gets in Link to comment
pillprob Posted June 3, 2015 Author Share Posted June 3, 2015 Hello btdt. Were you on paxil 60mg for 22 years? Tapered a year or so..to 10mg..... slowed at 10mg tapered to 0 in 7-8 wks. This is pretty much correct Then six months after end of paxil taper you had the antibiotic. yes How did you feel for those 6 months after the paxil taper before the antibiotic? At two and three months out I had a several small windows. Then at six months I got hit hard and I think the antibiotic very well triggered it. It is also my belief that the reason for this is that antibiotics destroy the probiotics in your stomach very quickly and your stomach is where the majority of serotonin is manufactured, hence an already starved brain of neurotransmitters get's starved much more. Equals big set back and panic attacks How long after the antibiotic did you start the ativan? Probably about a week Did you take the ativan while you were still on the antibiotic? No. Afterwards You took only 1mg of ativan... per day to start with and the dose was split or it was just one pill? Just one pill. After 3wks on ativan you tried to do an every other day taper felt bad and now trying to get stable on 75mg. Yes. Started Paxil for major depression at around 25. Up to 60 mg fast. Started weening at around 22nd year on it. Was cutting tiny bits on a very accurate pharmacy scale weekly and sometimes by weekly. Took around a year and a half. When I got to 10 mg, I tapered off of that in about 7 or 8 weeks. Too fast Stopped Paxil Oct 17 2014 At approximately six months off Paxil after a short course of antibiotics, developed major panic anxiety attacks. Started taking 1 mg of Ativan for about 3 weeks for this. Then on forth week tried to take Ativan ever other day or every two days. Stated experiencing withdrawal. Now I am trying to stabilize on .75, by taking .25 every 8 hours (.25 at 7am, .25 at 3pm .25 11pm) Link to comment
btdt Posted June 3, 2015 Share Posted June 3, 2015 Thank you I wanted to know if you were still in paxil wd when you took the antibiotic as I thought you would be and your were but it was not too bad... till the antibiotic I get slammed by drugs too had a ton of antibiotics so much so I destroyed all the bacteria in my gut... to the point tmi...maybe bowel movements look exactly like lime jello... This is how I got it fixed well as good as it is... doc said.. if this did not work and transplant of stool was next glad it worked. Lactobacillus acidophilus 3 capsules mixed in an individual apple sauce... 3x a day... for 30 days... it worked I have used pro biotics off and on since more on than off. I find they help with my mood too. I was an extreme case so I am not sure you need that much and not sure how to tweek it but I know the apple sauce is there for a few reasons as a growth medium to enhance the adherence of the acidophilus the hope it is it grows in the gut.. and to pectin to help with the runs... that is all I know but there are a lot stories about pro biotics on here if you search you will find them.. if not now when you feel better. hope it is of some use to you . peace WARNING THIS WILL BE LONG Had a car accident in 85 Codeine was the pain med when I was release from hosp continuous use till 89 Given PROZAC by a specialist to help with nerve pain in my leg 89-90 not sure which year Was not told a thing about it being a psych med thought it was a pain killer no info about psych side effects I went nuts had hallucinations. As I had a head injury and was diagnosed with a concussion in 85 I was sent to a head injury clinic in 1990 five years after the accident. I don't think they knew I had been on prozac I did not think it a big deal and never did finish the bottle of pills. I had tests of course lots of them. Was put into a pain clinic and given amitriptyline which stopped the withdrawal but had many side effects. But I could sleep something I had not done in a very long time the pain lessened. My mother got cancer in 94 they switched my meds to Zoloft to help deal with this pressure as I was her main care giver she died in 96. I stopped zoloft in 96 had withdrawal was put on paxil went nutty quit it ct put on resperidol quit it ct had withdrawal was put on Effexor... 2years later celexa was added 20mg then increased to 40mg huge personality change went wild. Did too fast taper off Celexa 05 as I felt unwell for a long time prior... quit Effexor 150mg ct 07 found ****** 8 months into withdrawal learned some things was banned from there in 08 have kept learning since. there is really not enough room here to put my history but I have a lot of opinions about a lot of things especially any of the drugs mentioned above. One thing I would like to add here is this tidbit ALL OPIATES INCREASE SEROTONIN it is not a huge jump to being in chronic pain to being put on an ssri/snri and opiates will affect your antidepressants and your thinking. As I do not update much I will put my quit date Nov. 17 2007 I quit Effexor cold turkey. http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1096-introducing-myself-btdt/ There is a crack in everything ..That's how the light gets in Link to comment
pillprob Posted June 3, 2015 Author Share Posted June 3, 2015 Yeah, I have been taking probiotics for several years but the AD still destroyed my gut and I've had major constipation for years. I resorted to many enema's and many colon hydrotherapists. Just had my second endoscopy/colonoscopy last week. Everything fine. I still have to take powdered magnesium every two or three days. Started Paxil for major depression at around 25. Up to 60 mg fast. Started weening at around 22nd year on it. Was cutting tiny bits on a very accurate pharmacy scale weekly and sometimes by weekly. Took around a year and a half. When I got to 10 mg, I tapered off of that in about 7 or 8 weeks. Too fast Stopped Paxil Oct 17 2014 At approximately six months off Paxil after a short course of antibiotics, developed major panic anxiety attacks. Started taking 1 mg of Ativan for about 3 weeks for this. Then on forth week tried to take Ativan ever other day or every two days. Stated experiencing withdrawal. Now I am trying to stabilize on .75, by taking .25 every 8 hours (.25 at 7am, .25 at 3pm .25 11pm) Link to comment
btdt Posted June 3, 2015 Share Posted June 3, 2015 I don't know if your into trying something new or not... or if it is good for you just now as it did affect my mood and maybe thinking.. I am struggling with thought processes just now.. could be from steroids still not sure...prednisone kicked my butt last month. There is a product call Bio Gaia it is L.Reuteri a different probiotic.. you can read a lot about it in my thread if you want to ... as I did a lot of research on it... it is given to babies in their bottles for colic in Europe as it is for kids under 12 it is regulated so what it says is in the bottle is actually in there unlike some other supplements. It is supposedly good for either constipation or the runs... can only be bought at health food stores and much be kept in the fridge. I used it and found it helped when I felt like my liver was about to explode. May be worth a look... I had continual constipation and motility issues ended up with a surgery in 2013 I had a found a few things that helped prior and one thing post surgery.. well a couple I just posted about on here the other day. Before surgery and after some of the same issue bowels not moving and bad constipation. Non drug help... I cup of warm water with half a lemon after my surgery when I went back to emerg enemas ect were suggested but they did not work.. I later learned from the specialist those could have harmed me post surgery... enemas did not work I started my bag of tricks ... warm lemon water was what started things working. I then started looking online for others who had this surgery... warm prune juice ... got that from a nurse who use to work with folks post surgery... it works too... if all else fails gi doc says mirapex but I don't feel well after it.. would rather do the lemon or prune juice as it does not upset the system... lemon is best for feeling well after use. Mirapex works it is the same sort of thing they give you to clean the colon pre colonoscopy ... sometimes I have to take the 9 probiotics a day to get things headed in the right direction... but then stop or go down to one a day ect... whatever works. Walking after eating and lots of water has helped me in the early days post ct. I can't take mag as I react badly to it as it turned on me after a couple days use post ct and make me worse not better tried one time later I just could not get up all wkend had to lay down.. either way it does not fit me. So I can't speak to the benefits... pros or cons.. Hope some of this is of use to you peace WARNING THIS WILL BE LONG Had a car accident in 85 Codeine was the pain med when I was release from hosp continuous use till 89 Given PROZAC by a specialist to help with nerve pain in my leg 89-90 not sure which year Was not told a thing about it being a psych med thought it was a pain killer no info about psych side effects I went nuts had hallucinations. As I had a head injury and was diagnosed with a concussion in 85 I was sent to a head injury clinic in 1990 five years after the accident. I don't think they knew I had been on prozac I did not think it a big deal and never did finish the bottle of pills. I had tests of course lots of them. Was put into a pain clinic and given amitriptyline which stopped the withdrawal but had many side effects. But I could sleep something I had not done in a very long time the pain lessened. My mother got cancer in 94 they switched my meds to Zoloft to help deal with this pressure as I was her main care giver she died in 96. I stopped zoloft in 96 had withdrawal was put on paxil went nutty quit it ct put on resperidol quit it ct had withdrawal was put on Effexor... 2years later celexa was added 20mg then increased to 40mg huge personality change went wild. Did too fast taper off Celexa 05 as I felt unwell for a long time prior... quit Effexor 150mg ct 07 found ****** 8 months into withdrawal learned some things was banned from there in 08 have kept learning since. there is really not enough room here to put my history but I have a lot of opinions about a lot of things especially any of the drugs mentioned above. One thing I would like to add here is this tidbit ALL OPIATES INCREASE SEROTONIN it is not a huge jump to being in chronic pain to being put on an ssri/snri and opiates will affect your antidepressants and your thinking. As I do not update much I will put my quit date Nov. 17 2007 I quit Effexor cold turkey. http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1096-introducing-myself-btdt/ There is a crack in everything ..That's how the light gets in Link to comment
pillprob Posted June 4, 2015 Author Share Posted June 4, 2015 Thanks allot for the info.. I am going to look into that probiotic Started Paxil for major depression at around 25. Up to 60 mg fast. Started weening at around 22nd year on it. Was cutting tiny bits on a very accurate pharmacy scale weekly and sometimes by weekly. Took around a year and a half. When I got to 10 mg, I tapered off of that in about 7 or 8 weeks. Too fast Stopped Paxil Oct 17 2014 At approximately six months off Paxil after a short course of antibiotics, developed major panic anxiety attacks. Started taking 1 mg of Ativan for about 3 weeks for this. Then on forth week tried to take Ativan ever other day or every two days. Stated experiencing withdrawal. Now I am trying to stabilize on .75, by taking .25 every 8 hours (.25 at 7am, .25 at 3pm .25 11pm) Link to comment
pillprob Posted June 4, 2015 Author Share Posted June 4, 2015 Hi. Skyler I have been able to hold at the original dose and times which were .25 7am, .25 3 pm, and .25 at 11pm. This is a bit strange but I think it's better if I try and stay here. I think you'll agree Started Paxil for major depression at around 25. Up to 60 mg fast. Started weening at around 22nd year on it. Was cutting tiny bits on a very accurate pharmacy scale weekly and sometimes by weekly. Took around a year and a half. When I got to 10 mg, I tapered off of that in about 7 or 8 weeks. Too fast Stopped Paxil Oct 17 2014 At approximately six months off Paxil after a short course of antibiotics, developed major panic anxiety attacks. Started taking 1 mg of Ativan for about 3 weeks for this. Then on forth week tried to take Ativan ever other day or every two days. Stated experiencing withdrawal. Now I am trying to stabilize on .75, by taking .25 every 8 hours (.25 at 7am, .25 at 3pm .25 11pm) Link to comment
pillprob Posted June 6, 2015 Author Share Posted June 6, 2015 Ok, I really, really am in desperate need of help. I am having what I believe is just a return of my condition pre anti-depressants. I remember well what I felt like before medicine. I had no will to live. I just laid in bed and was very anxious. I truly felt I'd be better off dead. This is how I feel now. It really feels the same after almost eight months off this drug. I remember first getting depressed when I was around eleven. By the time I was thirteen I was smoking weed everyday and as time went on I was drinking and smoking weed. Then to the AD. Now off eight months and seems everything is returning. This is not mild. This is VERY STRESSING, GOING OUT OF MY MIND CRAZY STUFF. VERY, VERY DEPRESSED. Many days over the past month have a almost resigned myself to check into a mental hospital but that has terrified me as well. But here I am again feeling very hopeless that this is a life long condition to which there is no way out. I am feeling hopeless. I eat very well, exercise, sleep eight hours, I have a psychotherapist. I am seriously thinking I need medicine to live some kind of normal life. I surely don't have one now. Life is very bad. It seems to be getting worse. Maybe an hour or two of less depression once and a while but nothing more. Started Paxil for major depression at around 25. Up to 60 mg fast. Started weening at around 22nd year on it. Was cutting tiny bits on a very accurate pharmacy scale weekly and sometimes by weekly. Took around a year and a half. When I got to 10 mg, I tapered off of that in about 7 or 8 weeks. Too fast Stopped Paxil Oct 17 2014 At approximately six months off Paxil after a short course of antibiotics, developed major panic anxiety attacks. Started taking 1 mg of Ativan for about 3 weeks for this. Then on forth week tried to take Ativan ever other day or every two days. Stated experiencing withdrawal. Now I am trying to stabilize on .75, by taking .25 every 8 hours (.25 at 7am, .25 at 3pm .25 11pm) Link to comment
btdt Posted June 6, 2015 Share Posted June 6, 2015 There are hormone fluctuations in kids as young as 11 pillprob. It may well have been that which caused your early symptoms as a lot of adolescents have a rough time during this transition. I actually read about it once and thought maybe this was the reason AD reactions were so bad for this age group. You smoked pot which is very different depending on the type I am learning about it from watching the legal post show on tv there are very many different types of pot. I actually meant a guy once who sold pot and has many different kinds I was already on ADs and was not smoking pot but heard the talk. At such a young age you don't know what kind of pot to ask for or if your like me did not even know there are different types. If you think about it a bit you managed to make it to 25 without any drugs. I am not sure what started you on paxil but I do know this.. when we are suffering sometimes thoughts that come to our minds are the doom ones .. drug induced I am sure ... our entire life has been crap and always will be in this mental state. So this very well may be the drugs talking you into a worse state... if you can change the channel using a meditation video or maybe some music... things may appear a bit better. Sometimes when I was struggling with this sort of thing I would sleep if I could just to get away from it in the hopes it would be gone when i woke up... it was a break for a time even it I woke to the same state. Everything is a bit easier if you can sleep so do sleep if you can. I don't know much about benzos I have used them a lot in my life but mostly hit and miss I was told they are very addictive and not to use them too many nights in a row for sleep... however I did have a time where I took 5 or so .5 lorazapam a day to get me thru what I now know was a drug side effect... and a day program at hosp... and I quit cold turkey... not knowing any better that is always how i did everything.. not knowing ... as you can see I did stay alive as I am here... but it was a rough go for a time.. I was taking a AP with it and quit them both.. same time. Actually did not have a doc post program to give me any more drugs... and did not know they were addictive. Lot of flapping gums about me I digress This is what else I have read about benzos since I am all educated now with the help of the web.. they cause depression.. now if I am wrong I am sure somebody will come hit me over the head but the idea to me that your feeling depressed taking a drug that can cause depression.. makes some sense.. we will have to ask...The Sky girl when she comes cause that is the extent of my benzo wisdom... Maybe it is that interdose thing she was speaking of that is causing you to feel so low... or something else. That is all I know so that is all I can say... how I got out of the mess I was in after quitting the benzo and the AP was effexor.. took it for 7 years.. 7 weird wasted life destroying years... oh I digress.. again. I can't recommend that one sorry... tho it got me out of bed it was other drugs that put me in the bed. I am hoping your alseep now as it is late and tomorrow things will be better wishing you peace WARNING THIS WILL BE LONG Had a car accident in 85 Codeine was the pain med when I was release from hosp continuous use till 89 Given PROZAC by a specialist to help with nerve pain in my leg 89-90 not sure which year Was not told a thing about it being a psych med thought it was a pain killer no info about psych side effects I went nuts had hallucinations. As I had a head injury and was diagnosed with a concussion in 85 I was sent to a head injury clinic in 1990 five years after the accident. I don't think they knew I had been on prozac I did not think it a big deal and never did finish the bottle of pills. I had tests of course lots of them. Was put into a pain clinic and given amitriptyline which stopped the withdrawal but had many side effects. But I could sleep something I had not done in a very long time the pain lessened. My mother got cancer in 94 they switched my meds to Zoloft to help deal with this pressure as I was her main care giver she died in 96. I stopped zoloft in 96 had withdrawal was put on paxil went nutty quit it ct put on resperidol quit it ct had withdrawal was put on Effexor... 2years later celexa was added 20mg then increased to 40mg huge personality change went wild. Did too fast taper off Celexa 05 as I felt unwell for a long time prior... quit Effexor 150mg ct 07 found ****** 8 months into withdrawal learned some things was banned from there in 08 have kept learning since. there is really not enough room here to put my history but I have a lot of opinions about a lot of things especially any of the drugs mentioned above. One thing I would like to add here is this tidbit ALL OPIATES INCREASE SEROTONIN it is not a huge jump to being in chronic pain to being put on an ssri/snri and opiates will affect your antidepressants and your thinking. As I do not update much I will put my quit date Nov. 17 2007 I quit Effexor cold turkey. http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1096-introducing-myself-btdt/ There is a crack in everything ..That's how the light gets in Link to comment
btdt Posted June 6, 2015 Share Posted June 6, 2015 There is always the chance and I have to say it.. not trying to complicate things but I have to say this ... There is a chance you have hit delayed withdrawal from prozac... be it started by the antibiotic or just bad timing.. there is a chance that is what is going on now. It is not unheard of for wd to hit real hard even 6 months out. I does happen... how one tells what it is .. I don't know that. Maybe somebody else knows and will come here and tell us. If that is the case I have no idea what to do about the benzo... If you need to see a doctor you need to... I doubt they can tell which it is either but maybe I don't know. At times like this I wish I knew more .. I just don't hoping you sleep and wake feeling better peace WARNING THIS WILL BE LONG Had a car accident in 85 Codeine was the pain med when I was release from hosp continuous use till 89 Given PROZAC by a specialist to help with nerve pain in my leg 89-90 not sure which year Was not told a thing about it being a psych med thought it was a pain killer no info about psych side effects I went nuts had hallucinations. As I had a head injury and was diagnosed with a concussion in 85 I was sent to a head injury clinic in 1990 five years after the accident. I don't think they knew I had been on prozac I did not think it a big deal and never did finish the bottle of pills. I had tests of course lots of them. Was put into a pain clinic and given amitriptyline which stopped the withdrawal but had many side effects. But I could sleep something I had not done in a very long time the pain lessened. My mother got cancer in 94 they switched my meds to Zoloft to help deal with this pressure as I was her main care giver she died in 96. I stopped zoloft in 96 had withdrawal was put on paxil went nutty quit it ct put on resperidol quit it ct had withdrawal was put on Effexor... 2years later celexa was added 20mg then increased to 40mg huge personality change went wild. Did too fast taper off Celexa 05 as I felt unwell for a long time prior... quit Effexor 150mg ct 07 found ****** 8 months into withdrawal learned some things was banned from there in 08 have kept learning since. there is really not enough room here to put my history but I have a lot of opinions about a lot of things especially any of the drugs mentioned above. One thing I would like to add here is this tidbit ALL OPIATES INCREASE SEROTONIN it is not a huge jump to being in chronic pain to being put on an ssri/snri and opiates will affect your antidepressants and your thinking. As I do not update much I will put my quit date Nov. 17 2007 I quit Effexor cold turkey. http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1096-introducing-myself-btdt/ There is a crack in everything ..That's how the light gets in Link to comment
pillprob Posted June 6, 2015 Author Share Posted June 6, 2015 Thanks for your kind words. I am really feeling terrible now. I am afraid of what the ativan is doing to me and I want off of it but i can't get off. I did not make it to 25 without drugs. I drank and smoked pot until then, then i went straight on to the AD. I am scared Started Paxil for major depression at around 25. Up to 60 mg fast. Started weening at around 22nd year on it. Was cutting tiny bits on a very accurate pharmacy scale weekly and sometimes by weekly. Took around a year and a half. When I got to 10 mg, I tapered off of that in about 7 or 8 weeks. Too fast Stopped Paxil Oct 17 2014 At approximately six months off Paxil after a short course of antibiotics, developed major panic anxiety attacks. Started taking 1 mg of Ativan for about 3 weeks for this. Then on forth week tried to take Ativan ever other day or every two days. Stated experiencing withdrawal. Now I am trying to stabilize on .75, by taking .25 every 8 hours (.25 at 7am, .25 at 3pm .25 11pm) Link to comment
btdt Posted June 6, 2015 Share Posted June 6, 2015 You may have smoked and drank but I don't think you did it every day... as most kids have no money and parents are watching too close... WARNING THIS WILL BE LONG Had a car accident in 85 Codeine was the pain med when I was release from hosp continuous use till 89 Given PROZAC by a specialist to help with nerve pain in my leg 89-90 not sure which year Was not told a thing about it being a psych med thought it was a pain killer no info about psych side effects I went nuts had hallucinations. As I had a head injury and was diagnosed with a concussion in 85 I was sent to a head injury clinic in 1990 five years after the accident. I don't think they knew I had been on prozac I did not think it a big deal and never did finish the bottle of pills. I had tests of course lots of them. Was put into a pain clinic and given amitriptyline which stopped the withdrawal but had many side effects. But I could sleep something I had not done in a very long time the pain lessened. My mother got cancer in 94 they switched my meds to Zoloft to help deal with this pressure as I was her main care giver she died in 96. I stopped zoloft in 96 had withdrawal was put on paxil went nutty quit it ct put on resperidol quit it ct had withdrawal was put on Effexor... 2years later celexa was added 20mg then increased to 40mg huge personality change went wild. Did too fast taper off Celexa 05 as I felt unwell for a long time prior... quit Effexor 150mg ct 07 found ****** 8 months into withdrawal learned some things was banned from there in 08 have kept learning since. there is really not enough room here to put my history but I have a lot of opinions about a lot of things especially any of the drugs mentioned above. One thing I would like to add here is this tidbit ALL OPIATES INCREASE SEROTONIN it is not a huge jump to being in chronic pain to being put on an ssri/snri and opiates will affect your antidepressants and your thinking. As I do not update much I will put my quit date Nov. 17 2007 I quit Effexor cold turkey. http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1096-introducing-myself-btdt/ There is a crack in everything ..That's how the light gets in Link to comment
pillprob Posted June 6, 2015 Author Share Posted June 6, 2015 I did it very regularly just like taking drugs. I am thinking to go to the hospital and rapid detox off ativan. They said they could do i in five days. I don't know what to do. I think it is causing more depression for me. Started Paxil for major depression at around 25. Up to 60 mg fast. Started weening at around 22nd year on it. Was cutting tiny bits on a very accurate pharmacy scale weekly and sometimes by weekly. Took around a year and a half. When I got to 10 mg, I tapered off of that in about 7 or 8 weeks. Too fast Stopped Paxil Oct 17 2014 At approximately six months off Paxil after a short course of antibiotics, developed major panic anxiety attacks. Started taking 1 mg of Ativan for about 3 weeks for this. Then on forth week tried to take Ativan ever other day or every two days. Stated experiencing withdrawal. Now I am trying to stabilize on .75, by taking .25 every 8 hours (.25 at 7am, .25 at 3pm .25 11pm) Link to comment
pillprob Posted June 6, 2015 Author Share Posted June 6, 2015 I am very very scared because I believe that this ativan is causing my depression to become much worse and I feel I need to get off this. I need help. Please. Started Paxil for major depression at around 25. Up to 60 mg fast. Started weening at around 22nd year on it. Was cutting tiny bits on a very accurate pharmacy scale weekly and sometimes by weekly. Took around a year and a half. When I got to 10 mg, I tapered off of that in about 7 or 8 weeks. Too fast Stopped Paxil Oct 17 2014 At approximately six months off Paxil after a short course of antibiotics, developed major panic anxiety attacks. Started taking 1 mg of Ativan for about 3 weeks for this. Then on forth week tried to take Ativan ever other day or every two days. Stated experiencing withdrawal. Now I am trying to stabilize on .75, by taking .25 every 8 hours (.25 at 7am, .25 at 3pm .25 11pm) Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Petunia Posted June 6, 2015 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted June 6, 2015 There doesn't seem to be any evidence to suggest that this wave of depression is being caused by the ativan. I'm thinking its more likely to be part of the waves and windows pattern of your recovery from paxil. The Windows aHnd Waves Pattern of Recovery When you get these kinds of thoughts, its important that you practice your calming techniques to reduce the anxiety. If you stop taking ativan now, especially with a rapid taper, you risk making your symptoms much, much worse. Here is a link with some calming videos, see if you can find one which helps you relax a little: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/6122-guided-meditations-calming-videos-sleep-hypnosis/ Pillprob, please would you add the date you stopped taking paxil to your signature. I'm not a doctor. My comments are not medical advise. These are my opinions based on my own experience and what I've learned. Please discuss your situation with a medical practitioner who has knowledge of tapering and withdrawal...if you are lucky enough to find one. My Introduction Thread Full Drug and Withdrawal History Brief Summary Several SSRIs for 13 years starting 1997 (for mild to moderate partly situational anxiety) Xanax PRN ~ Various other drugs over the years for side effects 2 month 'taper' off Lexapro 2010 Short acute withdrawal, followed by 2 -3 months of improvement then delayed protracted withdrawal DX ADHD followed by several years of stimulants and other drugs trying to manage increasing symptoms Failed reinstatement of Lexapro and trial of Prozac (became suicidal) May 2013 Found SA, learned about withdrawal, stopped taking drugs...healing begins. Protracted withdrawal, with a very sensitized nervous system, slowly recovering as time passes Supplements which have helped: Vitamin C, Magnesium, Taurine Bad reactions: Many supplements but mostly fish oil and Vitamin D June 2016 - Started daily juicing, mostly vegetables and lots of greens. Aug 2016 - Oct 2016 Best window ever, felt almost completely recovered Oct 2016 -Symptoms returned - bad days and less bad days. April 2018 - No windows, but significant improvement, it feels like permanent full recovery is close. VIDEO: Where did the chemical imbalance theory come from? VIDEO: How are psychiatric diagnoses made? VIDEO: Why do psychiatric drugs have withdrawal syndromes? VIDEO: Can psychiatric drugs cause long-lasting negative effects? VIDEO: Dr. Claire Weekes Link to comment
pillprob Posted June 6, 2015 Author Share Posted June 6, 2015 This is real bad. I'm having bad anxiety which it feels like I'm going crazy and I'm not even thinking. I am just in this awful tense state where I feel I need relief and this is what is causing and contributing to my depression. It feels hopeless that I go up on Ativan (building tolerance)or go back on AD or both. This is terrible. I need relief. I have been holding at .75 as told and it was working and now the last two days it has sprung out of control. More anxiety equals more depression because it is extremely uncomfortable. Yet I feel that more ativan will just prolong the inevitable of having to taper off this ativan at a higher dose. I really feel the ativan is causing more depression. This anxiety is not from thinking or not being able to relax. It is a physical state of tense, akathesia torment. No amount of meditation seems to relax it. This feels physical Started Paxil for major depression at around 25. Up to 60 mg fast. Started weening at around 22nd year on it. Was cutting tiny bits on a very accurate pharmacy scale weekly and sometimes by weekly. Took around a year and a half. When I got to 10 mg, I tapered off of that in about 7 or 8 weeks. Too fast Stopped Paxil Oct 17 2014 At approximately six months off Paxil after a short course of antibiotics, developed major panic anxiety attacks. Started taking 1 mg of Ativan for about 3 weeks for this. Then on forth week tried to take Ativan ever other day or every two days. Stated experiencing withdrawal. Now I am trying to stabilize on .75, by taking .25 every 8 hours (.25 at 7am, .25 at 3pm .25 11pm) Link to comment
pillprob Posted June 6, 2015 Author Share Posted June 6, 2015 I think I am going to have to do the 1mg split in four every six hours. I can't go on like this. but do you think that I will still be healing from the paxil? I just cannot get myself to believe this because different people have said that my brain cannot really start to heal until I am completely drug free. This scares me and makes me wan to be off it. Did you ever improve while you were on any drug? Started Paxil for major depression at around 25. Up to 60 mg fast. Started weening at around 22nd year on it. Was cutting tiny bits on a very accurate pharmacy scale weekly and sometimes by weekly. Took around a year and a half. When I got to 10 mg, I tapered off of that in about 7 or 8 weeks. Too fast Stopped Paxil Oct 17 2014 At approximately six months off Paxil after a short course of antibiotics, developed major panic anxiety attacks. Started taking 1 mg of Ativan for about 3 weeks for this. Then on forth week tried to take Ativan ever other day or every two days. Stated experiencing withdrawal. Now I am trying to stabilize on .75, by taking .25 every 8 hours (.25 at 7am, .25 at 3pm .25 11pm) Link to comment
btdt Posted June 6, 2015 Share Posted June 6, 2015 I think I am going to have to do the 1mg split in four every six hours. I can't go on like this. but do you think that I will still be healing from the paxil? I just cannot get myself to believe this because different people have said that my brain cannot really start to heal until I am completely drug free. This scares me and makes me wan to be off it. Did you ever improve while you were on any drug? Yes you will still be healing from the paxil a lot of people have used a benzo to help them in paxil wd...it is suppose to help take the edge off some of the wd symptoms. If your brain could not heal until you were completely drug free then there would be no reason to taper... it would make taper useless... As you can see here people do heal while tapering off AD drugs they do it every day.... and as they get lower in dose they are healing. It is not just removing the drug that causes wd symptoms it is the changes made to the brain by the drug that causes wd .. we see in cold turkey like I did... that ct hurts the brain even more.. I was debilitated completely as my brain had no chance to heal slowly... slow healing is what the body can do fast healing not so much. When you ad a drug into your body this changes things fast the body changes in response to the drug but it does it very slowly... gradual is what the body can do not fast. Did I ever improve while on any drug... no but I did not improve off the drugs either I got worse.. way worse cause I did it too fast threw my entire system into more trouble I was also in tolerance when I quit so one hell to another hell nothing helped I knew nothing. You have gone down in dose from 1mg of ativan to .75 maybe you need the 1 to get stable if that does not work there is always the hosp rapid detox as a last resort.. what do you have to lose really a bit more time and for the time you will have gained a bit more understanding on what is going on with you depending on how you react to the 1mg. This is how it always is trial and error it is the best we got... it may not seem like much but compared to where I was quitting alone 7 years ago it truly is a step up. I wish you peace WARNING THIS WILL BE LONG Had a car accident in 85 Codeine was the pain med when I was release from hosp continuous use till 89 Given PROZAC by a specialist to help with nerve pain in my leg 89-90 not sure which year Was not told a thing about it being a psych med thought it was a pain killer no info about psych side effects I went nuts had hallucinations. As I had a head injury and was diagnosed with a concussion in 85 I was sent to a head injury clinic in 1990 five years after the accident. I don't think they knew I had been on prozac I did not think it a big deal and never did finish the bottle of pills. I had tests of course lots of them. Was put into a pain clinic and given amitriptyline which stopped the withdrawal but had many side effects. But I could sleep something I had not done in a very long time the pain lessened. My mother got cancer in 94 they switched my meds to Zoloft to help deal with this pressure as I was her main care giver she died in 96. I stopped zoloft in 96 had withdrawal was put on paxil went nutty quit it ct put on resperidol quit it ct had withdrawal was put on Effexor... 2years later celexa was added 20mg then increased to 40mg huge personality change went wild. Did too fast taper off Celexa 05 as I felt unwell for a long time prior... quit Effexor 150mg ct 07 found ****** 8 months into withdrawal learned some things was banned from there in 08 have kept learning since. there is really not enough room here to put my history but I have a lot of opinions about a lot of things especially any of the drugs mentioned above. One thing I would like to add here is this tidbit ALL OPIATES INCREASE SEROTONIN it is not a huge jump to being in chronic pain to being put on an ssri/snri and opiates will affect your antidepressants and your thinking. As I do not update much I will put my quit date Nov. 17 2007 I quit Effexor cold turkey. http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1096-introducing-myself-btdt/ There is a crack in everything ..That's how the light gets in Link to comment
pillprob Posted June 6, 2015 Author Share Posted June 6, 2015 I took my .25 and I dosed off but I feel this ativan is screwing me up I just woke up about two hours later an I feel awful. When I first took the .25 I had these weird type thoughts in my head. This is what usually happens. Like little pieces of thoughts that have nothing to do with anything. Like I see a walnut or a tire rolling or a piece of a bug or just weird crazy stuff floating around that means nothing. It's like my brain is just going haywire. And I also have the awful depression. I don't know what to do because this is not something that i can continue. I don't want to eat. I don't want to do anything but to lay in bed and try and sleep but i can't so I'm very restless Started Paxil for major depression at around 25. Up to 60 mg fast. Started weening at around 22nd year on it. Was cutting tiny bits on a very accurate pharmacy scale weekly and sometimes by weekly. Took around a year and a half. When I got to 10 mg, I tapered off of that in about 7 or 8 weeks. Too fast Stopped Paxil Oct 17 2014 At approximately six months off Paxil after a short course of antibiotics, developed major panic anxiety attacks. Started taking 1 mg of Ativan for about 3 weeks for this. Then on forth week tried to take Ativan ever other day or every two days. Stated experiencing withdrawal. Now I am trying to stabilize on .75, by taking .25 every 8 hours (.25 at 7am, .25 at 3pm .25 11pm) Link to comment
Meimeiquest Posted June 7, 2015 Share Posted June 7, 2015 Some parts of this are just hard. What if you just laid in bed, not sleeping, not eating (but drinking) for a few days? I think you really need to establish a dose and just be there for a while...bad times and all. The bad times will pass. If you can think of something distracting to do, great, if not, just be there. What you have proven to yourself is that no dose feels okay, but that's okay. It will get better. 1st round Prozac 1989/90, clear depression symptoms. 2nd round Prozac started 1999 when admitted to dr. I was tired. Prozac pooped out, switch to Cymbalta 3/2006. Diagnosed with bipolar disorder due to mania 6/2006--then I was taken abruptly off Cymbalta and didn't know I had SSRI withdrawal. Lots of meds for my intractable "bipolar" symptoms. Zyprexa started about 9/06, mostly 5mg. Tapered 4/12 through12/29/12 Wellbutrin. XL 300 mg started 1/07, tapered 1/18/13 through 7/8/13 Oxazepam mostly continuously since 6/06, 30mg since 12/12, tapered 1.17.14 through 8.26.15 11/06 Lithium 600mg twice daily, 2.2.14 400mg TID DIY liquid, 2.12.14 1150mg, 3.2.14 1100mg, 3.18.14 1075mg, 4/14 updose to 1100mg, 6.1.14 900 mg capsules 7.8.14 810mg, 8.17.14 725mg, 8.24.24 700mg...10.22.14 487.5mg, 3.9.15 475mg, 4.1.15 462.5mg 4.21.15 450mg 8.11.15 375mg, 11.28.15 362.5mg, back to 375mg four days later, 3.4.16 updose to 475 (too much going on to risk trouble) 9/4/13 Toprol-XL 25mg daily for sudden hypertension, tapered 11.12.13 through 5.3.14, last 10 days or so switched to atenolol 7.4.14 Started Walsh Protocol 56 years old Link to comment
btdt Posted June 7, 2015 Share Posted June 7, 2015 I took my .25 and I dosed off but I feel this ativan is screwing me up I just woke up about two hours later an I feel awful. When I first took the .25 I had these weird type thoughts in my head. This is what usually happens. Like little pieces of thoughts that have nothing to do with anything. Like I see a walnut or a tire rolling or a piece of a bug or just weird crazy stuff floating around that means nothing. It's like my brain is just going haywire. And I also have the awful depression. I don't know what to do because this is not something that i can continue. I don't want to eat. I don't want to do anything but to lay in bed and try and sleep but i can't so I'm very restless when I was restless I walked... I walked a lot it helped me not be restless gave me something to do... eating if your not puking is something to pay attention to... I always think to eat something as I think it helps the body and brain connect I do think that.... something small a salad maybe ...boiled veggies... raw veggies and dip for a long time I would make soup.. chopping up the veggies soothed me watching the soup cook all of it gave me a purpose could you cook something even if you did not feel much like eating a lot maybe make it for you wife and have a small amount some of this is going to suck but distraction helps it such less distraction means you engage your mind fully on something anything you like cooking has worked for me and mostly I am not cooking for myself but for my son but once it is cooked then I like to eat it too what do you like to do? If you can't think of anything there are ideas in the self care page It may take some time for your body to realize it is getting the full 1mg and to settle down getting thru the waiting part with the least aggravation is the point here If you like to do things with your hands maybe that is a good idea .. if you musical then music... even listening or watching videos.. there is a thread here called music I know cause I put it here... there is one of quotes and one of prayers.. these are distraction type things... Have a bath ...soak your feet do the laundry... sweep the floor... there are lots of things to distract if you choose but first you have to choose. I hate the things that come in the head and if you want to try this it may or may not help... sometimes it does.. I got it from that book called the power of now... he said his brain was doing whatever it wanted.. running on and on.. well mind did that too a lot this is what I learned in that book focus on your next thought watch intently for it... as long as your watching for it it will not come it is like magic... I so love it was like winning the lottery when I found this I wanted to go outside and tell the world...lol bring the white coats... really it is that good. when you first start doing it .. there is a bit of hit and miss your mind will run still sometimes but like training anything you just start over back to clearing your mind then watching intently for the next thought... I got so good at this when i really needed it I could do it at walmart standing in line... then like anything if you don't use it you lose it ... I did not need it for a long time then when I did again I had to start over.. but soon enough it all came back online. give it ago it may really help I hope it does peace WARNING THIS WILL BE LONG Had a car accident in 85 Codeine was the pain med when I was release from hosp continuous use till 89 Given PROZAC by a specialist to help with nerve pain in my leg 89-90 not sure which year Was not told a thing about it being a psych med thought it was a pain killer no info about psych side effects I went nuts had hallucinations. As I had a head injury and was diagnosed with a concussion in 85 I was sent to a head injury clinic in 1990 five years after the accident. I don't think they knew I had been on prozac I did not think it a big deal and never did finish the bottle of pills. I had tests of course lots of them. Was put into a pain clinic and given amitriptyline which stopped the withdrawal but had many side effects. But I could sleep something I had not done in a very long time the pain lessened. My mother got cancer in 94 they switched my meds to Zoloft to help deal with this pressure as I was her main care giver she died in 96. I stopped zoloft in 96 had withdrawal was put on paxil went nutty quit it ct put on resperidol quit it ct had withdrawal was put on Effexor... 2years later celexa was added 20mg then increased to 40mg huge personality change went wild. Did too fast taper off Celexa 05 as I felt unwell for a long time prior... quit Effexor 150mg ct 07 found ****** 8 months into withdrawal learned some things was banned from there in 08 have kept learning since. there is really not enough room here to put my history but I have a lot of opinions about a lot of things especially any of the drugs mentioned above. One thing I would like to add here is this tidbit ALL OPIATES INCREASE SEROTONIN it is not a huge jump to being in chronic pain to being put on an ssri/snri and opiates will affect your antidepressants and your thinking. As I do not update much I will put my quit date Nov. 17 2007 I quit Effexor cold turkey. http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1096-introducing-myself-btdt/ There is a crack in everything ..That's how the light gets in Link to comment
westcoast Posted June 7, 2015 Share Posted June 7, 2015 Pillprob, do you know what method that hospital uses for benzo detox? Maybe it would help you decide. (Also check online reviews.) 2009: Cancer hospital said I had adjustment disorder because I thought they were doing it wrong. Their headshrinker prescribed Effexor, and my life set on a new course. I didn't know what was ahead, like a passenger on Disneyland's Matterhorn, smiling and waving as it climbs...clink, clink, clink. 2010: Post surgical accidental Effexor discontinuation by nurses, masked by intravenous Dilaudid. (The car is balanced at the top of the track.) I get home, pop a Vicodin, and ... Whooosh...down, down, down, down, down...goes the trajectory of my life, up goes my mood and tendency to think everything is a good idea.2012: After the bipolar jig was up, now a walking bag of unrelated symptoms, I went crazy on Daytrana (the Ritalin skin patch by Noven), because ADHD was a perfect fit for a bag of unrelated symptoms. I was prescribed Effexor for the nervousness of it, and things got neurological. An EEG showed enough activity to warrant an epilepsy diagnosis rather than non-epileptic ("psychogenic") seizures. 2013-2014: Quit everything and got worse. I probably went through DAWS: dopamine agonist withdrawal syndrome. I drank to not feel, but I felt a lot: dread, fear, regret, grief: an utter sense of total loss of everything worth breathing about, for almost two years. I was not suicidal but I wanted to be dead, at least dead to the experience of my own brain and body. 2015: I began to recover after adding virgin coconut oil and organic grass-fed fed butter to a cup of instant coffee in the morning. I did it hoping for mental acuity and better memory. After ten days of that, I was much better, mood-wise. Approximately neutral. And, I experienced drowsiness. I could sleep. Not exactly happy, I did 30 days on Wellbutrin, because it had done me no harm in the past. I don't have the DAWS mood or state of mind. It never feel like doing anything if it means standing up. In fact, I don't especially like moving. I'm a brain with a beanbag body. Link to comment
pillprob Posted June 7, 2015 Author Share Posted June 7, 2015 Thank you meimiquest, west coast. BTDT, I know you are right. I have the power of now. I know I have to learn to be uncomfortable. It's super hard for me. I've been uncomfortable for a long time. I know you all have too. I'm trying to muster up the will. Not to make excuses for myself but my wife is a huge extra burden with her Multiple Sclerosis and all. She really sucks me dry of my energy I need to do this. I am seriously considering a separation until I get well but I don't know if i can feel ok with this. She has a family close by. I don't. She will be taken care of but guilt may keep me from doing this. She even told me she is ok with it and I still can't seem to leave for a while. 26 years together. I am attached and dependent Started Paxil for major depression at around 25. Up to 60 mg fast. Started weening at around 22nd year on it. Was cutting tiny bits on a very accurate pharmacy scale weekly and sometimes by weekly. Took around a year and a half. When I got to 10 mg, I tapered off of that in about 7 or 8 weeks. Too fast Stopped Paxil Oct 17 2014 At approximately six months off Paxil after a short course of antibiotics, developed major panic anxiety attacks. Started taking 1 mg of Ativan for about 3 weeks for this. Then on forth week tried to take Ativan ever other day or every two days. Stated experiencing withdrawal. Now I am trying to stabilize on .75, by taking .25 every 8 hours (.25 at 7am, .25 at 3pm .25 11pm) Link to comment
btdt Posted June 9, 2015 Share Posted June 9, 2015 Thank you meimiquest, west coast. BTDT, I know you are right. I have the power of now. I know I have to learn to be uncomfortable. It's super hard for me. I've been uncomfortable for a long time. I know you all have too. I'm trying to muster up the will. Not to make excuses for myself but my wife is a huge extra burden with her Multiple Sclerosis and all. She really sucks me dry of my energy I need to do this. I am seriously considering a separation until I get well but I don't know if i can feel ok with this. She has a family close by. I don't. She will be taken care of but guilt may keep me from doing this. She even told me she is ok with it and I still can't seem to leave for a while. 26 years together. I am attached and dependent The power of now especially that exercise helped me feel more comfortable not less... there is no way I would ever try to learn to be uncomfortable... no thanks... I am not sure if I am missing something here or not... The entire point of everything is to feel better now worse. The sections on self care is good for ideas that may help with feeling better. Deep relaxations has helped me. For times I want to be guided I use this one He is quiet just talking no music or waves... sometimes I like him best other times I like this one ..these are my two favs. WARNING THIS WILL BE LONG Had a car accident in 85 Codeine was the pain med when I was release from hosp continuous use till 89 Given PROZAC by a specialist to help with nerve pain in my leg 89-90 not sure which year Was not told a thing about it being a psych med thought it was a pain killer no info about psych side effects I went nuts had hallucinations. As I had a head injury and was diagnosed with a concussion in 85 I was sent to a head injury clinic in 1990 five years after the accident. I don't think they knew I had been on prozac I did not think it a big deal and never did finish the bottle of pills. I had tests of course lots of them. Was put into a pain clinic and given amitriptyline which stopped the withdrawal but had many side effects. But I could sleep something I had not done in a very long time the pain lessened. My mother got cancer in 94 they switched my meds to Zoloft to help deal with this pressure as I was her main care giver she died in 96. I stopped zoloft in 96 had withdrawal was put on paxil went nutty quit it ct put on resperidol quit it ct had withdrawal was put on Effexor... 2years later celexa was added 20mg then increased to 40mg huge personality change went wild. Did too fast taper off Celexa 05 as I felt unwell for a long time prior... quit Effexor 150mg ct 07 found ****** 8 months into withdrawal learned some things was banned from there in 08 have kept learning since. there is really not enough room here to put my history but I have a lot of opinions about a lot of things especially any of the drugs mentioned above. One thing I would like to add here is this tidbit ALL OPIATES INCREASE SEROTONIN it is not a huge jump to being in chronic pain to being put on an ssri/snri and opiates will affect your antidepressants and your thinking. As I do not update much I will put my quit date Nov. 17 2007 I quit Effexor cold turkey. http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1096-introducing-myself-btdt/ There is a crack in everything ..That's how the light gets in Link to comment
Mentor ang Posted June 9, 2015 Mentor Share Posted June 9, 2015 I have been reading all your posts for at least five years. I will try and make my story as short as I can. First off I would like to clarify that I am a 51 year old man. My name is Michael and I was staying in Florida with my mother and grandfather but I am back in California, where I was born and raised. The pills made me afraid to reveal my true identity. These pills have done many bad things to me. I will just try to cut to the chase. Tragedy in family from the age of 14 to 17. By 18 years old had ECT. Temporary relief. Started Paxil at around twenty five. Been on for over twenty years. Did very slow taper and have been off for almost 7 months. Horrible adadonia, apathy, anxiety depression, panic attacks etc. What scared me more is that the first 3 to 4 months were not super bad and I had a few windows. Now all of a sudden at six months severe anxiety and depression getting worse. Terrified. Going backward? Always move forwards, never backwards. 1992 Dothiepin 375mg 8 weeks, exhaustion/depression. Serotonin syndrome, oh yes! seizures . Fell pregnant, 3rd baby, Nitrous Oxide, 3 weeks mental hospital pp psychosis. zoloft tegretol. Feb 1996 ct tegretol, tapered Zoloft 8 weeks. as (unexpectedly) pregnant. Steven died after 3 days.(Zolft HLHS baby). 98 had run in with Paxil, 2 tablets, 3 weeks taper, survived.2005..menopause? exhausted again. Zyprexa, mad in three days, fallout.... Seroquel, Effexor, tegretol, and 8 years of self destruction. Failed taper.Damn 1/4 valium... nuts again! .fallout, zoloft 100mg seroquol 400mg mirtazapine 45 mg tegretol 400mg. Mid 14 3 month taper. Nov 14 CRASH.Mid 15 .... 75mg seroquel, 3 x 1800mg SJW 2 week window end of December followed by 6 week wave5/2 68mg seroquel, 2.5 x 1800mg SJW::::20/2 61mg seroquel, 2.5 x SJW::: 26/2 54mg seroquel, 2 x SJW::::21/3 43mg seroquel, 1 x 2700SJW :::: 23/4 36mg seroquel 1 x 1800 SJW15/5 33mg seroquel, 1 x SJW:::: 28/5 30mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::; 18/6 25mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::::, 11/7 21mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::, 26/7 18mg seroquel 1/2 SJW:::, 9/8 12mg seroquel :::, 16/8 6mg seroquel ;;;;, 12/9 0 jump. 23/9 3mg....., 27/9 0mg. Reinstated, 6mg, then 12mg............. LIGHTBULB MOMENT, I have MTHFR 2x mutations. CFS and issues with MOULD in my home. So I left home, and working 150km away during week, loving it. Oh was hard, panic attacks first week, gone now, along with the mould issues. Link to comment
Mentor ang Posted June 9, 2015 Mentor Share Posted June 9, 2015 To Petunia and Whoopie I was on 60 mgs Paxil. I was also taking Ativan as needed and five or more years ago i was on Lithium off and on. I am not bipolar at all. The last five years of my drug use was only Paxil and I withdrew over a two year period weighing out very small little chips with an 800 dollar pharmacy scale I bought for the accuracy and sensitivity for the tiny dose range. The mistake i may have made was to speed up the taper on the last 10 mgs. and I should have slowed it down to several more weeks which I did not do and I kind of "jumped off" with some quick larger doses. At least I didn't CT like some of the people on here. I never realised scales cost that much! Good luck with your taper 1992 Dothiepin 375mg 8 weeks, exhaustion/depression. Serotonin syndrome, oh yes! seizures . Fell pregnant, 3rd baby, Nitrous Oxide, 3 weeks mental hospital pp psychosis. zoloft tegretol. Feb 1996 ct tegretol, tapered Zoloft 8 weeks. as (unexpectedly) pregnant. Steven died after 3 days.(Zolft HLHS baby). 98 had run in with Paxil, 2 tablets, 3 weeks taper, survived.2005..menopause? exhausted again. Zyprexa, mad in three days, fallout.... Seroquel, Effexor, tegretol, and 8 years of self destruction. Failed taper.Damn 1/4 valium... nuts again! .fallout, zoloft 100mg seroquol 400mg mirtazapine 45 mg tegretol 400mg. Mid 14 3 month taper. Nov 14 CRASH.Mid 15 .... 75mg seroquel, 3 x 1800mg SJW 2 week window end of December followed by 6 week wave5/2 68mg seroquel, 2.5 x 1800mg SJW::::20/2 61mg seroquel, 2.5 x SJW::: 26/2 54mg seroquel, 2 x SJW::::21/3 43mg seroquel, 1 x 2700SJW :::: 23/4 36mg seroquel 1 x 1800 SJW15/5 33mg seroquel, 1 x SJW:::: 28/5 30mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::; 18/6 25mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::::, 11/7 21mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::, 26/7 18mg seroquel 1/2 SJW:::, 9/8 12mg seroquel :::, 16/8 6mg seroquel ;;;;, 12/9 0 jump. 23/9 3mg....., 27/9 0mg. Reinstated, 6mg, then 12mg............. LIGHTBULB MOMENT, I have MTHFR 2x mutations. CFS and issues with MOULD in my home. So I left home, and working 150km away during week, loving it. Oh was hard, panic attacks first week, gone now, along with the mould issues. Link to comment
btdt Posted June 9, 2015 Share Posted June 9, 2015 I have been reading all your posts for at least five years. I will try and make my story as short as I can. First off I would like to clarify that I am a 51 year old man. My name is Michael and I was staying in Florida with my mother and grandfather but I am back in California, where I was born and raised. The pills made me afraid to reveal my true identity. These pills have done many bad things to me. I will just try to cut to the chase. Tragedy in family from the age of 14 to 17. By 18 years old had ECT. Temporary relief. Started Paxil at around twenty five. Been on for over twenty years. Did very slow taper and have been off for almost 7 months. Horrible adadonia, apathy, anxiety depression, panic attacks etc. What scared me more is that the first 3 to 4 months were not super bad and I had a few windows. Now all of a sudden at six months severe anxiety and depression getting worse. Terrified. Going backward? Born and raised in California, why such poor English written skills? Ang at 7 months clean I could not open my email account due to cognitive issues it takes time to get well... just saying this I think is common WARNING THIS WILL BE LONG Had a car accident in 85 Codeine was the pain med when I was release from hosp continuous use till 89 Given PROZAC by a specialist to help with nerve pain in my leg 89-90 not sure which year Was not told a thing about it being a psych med thought it was a pain killer no info about psych side effects I went nuts had hallucinations. As I had a head injury and was diagnosed with a concussion in 85 I was sent to a head injury clinic in 1990 five years after the accident. I don't think they knew I had been on prozac I did not think it a big deal and never did finish the bottle of pills. I had tests of course lots of them. Was put into a pain clinic and given amitriptyline which stopped the withdrawal but had many side effects. But I could sleep something I had not done in a very long time the pain lessened. My mother got cancer in 94 they switched my meds to Zoloft to help deal with this pressure as I was her main care giver she died in 96. I stopped zoloft in 96 had withdrawal was put on paxil went nutty quit it ct put on resperidol quit it ct had withdrawal was put on Effexor... 2years later celexa was added 20mg then increased to 40mg huge personality change went wild. Did too fast taper off Celexa 05 as I felt unwell for a long time prior... quit Effexor 150mg ct 07 found ****** 8 months into withdrawal learned some things was banned from there in 08 have kept learning since. there is really not enough room here to put my history but I have a lot of opinions about a lot of things especially any of the drugs mentioned above. One thing I would like to add here is this tidbit ALL OPIATES INCREASE SEROTONIN it is not a huge jump to being in chronic pain to being put on an ssri/snri and opiates will affect your antidepressants and your thinking. As I do not update much I will put my quit date Nov. 17 2007 I quit Effexor cold turkey. http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1096-introducing-myself-btdt/ There is a crack in everything ..That's how the light gets in Link to comment
btdt Posted June 9, 2015 Share Posted June 9, 2015 So PP are you doing .25 every 6 hours now? If you are how for how long..? have you noticed any difference in how you feel? WARNING THIS WILL BE LONG Had a car accident in 85 Codeine was the pain med when I was release from hosp continuous use till 89 Given PROZAC by a specialist to help with nerve pain in my leg 89-90 not sure which year Was not told a thing about it being a psych med thought it was a pain killer no info about psych side effects I went nuts had hallucinations. As I had a head injury and was diagnosed with a concussion in 85 I was sent to a head injury clinic in 1990 five years after the accident. I don't think they knew I had been on prozac I did not think it a big deal and never did finish the bottle of pills. I had tests of course lots of them. Was put into a pain clinic and given amitriptyline which stopped the withdrawal but had many side effects. But I could sleep something I had not done in a very long time the pain lessened. My mother got cancer in 94 they switched my meds to Zoloft to help deal with this pressure as I was her main care giver she died in 96. I stopped zoloft in 96 had withdrawal was put on paxil went nutty quit it ct put on resperidol quit it ct had withdrawal was put on Effexor... 2years later celexa was added 20mg then increased to 40mg huge personality change went wild. Did too fast taper off Celexa 05 as I felt unwell for a long time prior... quit Effexor 150mg ct 07 found ****** 8 months into withdrawal learned some things was banned from there in 08 have kept learning since. there is really not enough room here to put my history but I have a lot of opinions about a lot of things especially any of the drugs mentioned above. One thing I would like to add here is this tidbit ALL OPIATES INCREASE SEROTONIN it is not a huge jump to being in chronic pain to being put on an ssri/snri and opiates will affect your antidepressants and your thinking. As I do not update much I will put my quit date Nov. 17 2007 I quit Effexor cold turkey. http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1096-introducing-myself-btdt/ There is a crack in everything ..That's how the light gets in Link to comment
Mentor ang Posted June 9, 2015 Mentor Share Posted June 9, 2015 Very nice answer. Thank you Fresh. Now I will post the question again here as Petunia has requested. I'm very concerned that because I am on a very low dose of Ativan (1 mg for only 1 month) and tapering, that it is slowing my Paxil progress. Any thoughts please? Wish you well 1992 Dothiepin 375mg 8 weeks, exhaustion/depression. Serotonin syndrome, oh yes! seizures . Fell pregnant, 3rd baby, Nitrous Oxide, 3 weeks mental hospital pp psychosis. zoloft tegretol. Feb 1996 ct tegretol, tapered Zoloft 8 weeks. as (unexpectedly) pregnant. Steven died after 3 days.(Zolft HLHS baby). 98 had run in with Paxil, 2 tablets, 3 weeks taper, survived.2005..menopause? exhausted again. Zyprexa, mad in three days, fallout.... Seroquel, Effexor, tegretol, and 8 years of self destruction. Failed taper.Damn 1/4 valium... nuts again! .fallout, zoloft 100mg seroquol 400mg mirtazapine 45 mg tegretol 400mg. Mid 14 3 month taper. Nov 14 CRASH.Mid 15 .... 75mg seroquel, 3 x 1800mg SJW 2 week window end of December followed by 6 week wave5/2 68mg seroquel, 2.5 x 1800mg SJW::::20/2 61mg seroquel, 2.5 x SJW::: 26/2 54mg seroquel, 2 x SJW::::21/3 43mg seroquel, 1 x 2700SJW :::: 23/4 36mg seroquel 1 x 1800 SJW15/5 33mg seroquel, 1 x SJW:::: 28/5 30mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::; 18/6 25mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::::, 11/7 21mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::, 26/7 18mg seroquel 1/2 SJW:::, 9/8 12mg seroquel :::, 16/8 6mg seroquel ;;;;, 12/9 0 jump. 23/9 3mg....., 27/9 0mg. Reinstated, 6mg, then 12mg............. LIGHTBULB MOMENT, I have MTHFR 2x mutations. CFS and issues with MOULD in my home. So I left home, and working 150km away during week, loving it. Oh was hard, panic attacks first week, gone now, along with the mould issues. Link to comment
btdt Posted June 9, 2015 Share Posted June 9, 2015 Good that you have the scale once stable you can measure each dose and reduce it by 10% hope it is a good enough scale to do this. WARNING THIS WILL BE LONG Had a car accident in 85 Codeine was the pain med when I was release from hosp continuous use till 89 Given PROZAC by a specialist to help with nerve pain in my leg 89-90 not sure which year Was not told a thing about it being a psych med thought it was a pain killer no info about psych side effects I went nuts had hallucinations. As I had a head injury and was diagnosed with a concussion in 85 I was sent to a head injury clinic in 1990 five years after the accident. I don't think they knew I had been on prozac I did not think it a big deal and never did finish the bottle of pills. I had tests of course lots of them. Was put into a pain clinic and given amitriptyline which stopped the withdrawal but had many side effects. But I could sleep something I had not done in a very long time the pain lessened. My mother got cancer in 94 they switched my meds to Zoloft to help deal with this pressure as I was her main care giver she died in 96. I stopped zoloft in 96 had withdrawal was put on paxil went nutty quit it ct put on resperidol quit it ct had withdrawal was put on Effexor... 2years later celexa was added 20mg then increased to 40mg huge personality change went wild. Did too fast taper off Celexa 05 as I felt unwell for a long time prior... quit Effexor 150mg ct 07 found ****** 8 months into withdrawal learned some things was banned from there in 08 have kept learning since. there is really not enough room here to put my history but I have a lot of opinions about a lot of things especially any of the drugs mentioned above. One thing I would like to add here is this tidbit ALL OPIATES INCREASE SEROTONIN it is not a huge jump to being in chronic pain to being put on an ssri/snri and opiates will affect your antidepressants and your thinking. As I do not update much I will put my quit date Nov. 17 2007 I quit Effexor cold turkey. http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1096-introducing-myself-btdt/ There is a crack in everything ..That's how the light gets in Link to comment
Mentor ang Posted June 9, 2015 Mentor Share Posted June 9, 2015 I did it very regularly just like taking drugs. I am thinking to go to the hospital and rapid detox off ativan. They said they could do i in five days. I don't know what to do. I think it is causing more depression for me. Good luck.. 1992 Dothiepin 375mg 8 weeks, exhaustion/depression. Serotonin syndrome, oh yes! seizures . Fell pregnant, 3rd baby, Nitrous Oxide, 3 weeks mental hospital pp psychosis. zoloft tegretol. Feb 1996 ct tegretol, tapered Zoloft 8 weeks. as (unexpectedly) pregnant. Steven died after 3 days.(Zolft HLHS baby). 98 had run in with Paxil, 2 tablets, 3 weeks taper, survived.2005..menopause? exhausted again. Zyprexa, mad in three days, fallout.... Seroquel, Effexor, tegretol, and 8 years of self destruction. Failed taper.Damn 1/4 valium... nuts again! .fallout, zoloft 100mg seroquol 400mg mirtazapine 45 mg tegretol 400mg. Mid 14 3 month taper. Nov 14 CRASH.Mid 15 .... 75mg seroquel, 3 x 1800mg SJW 2 week window end of December followed by 6 week wave5/2 68mg seroquel, 2.5 x 1800mg SJW::::20/2 61mg seroquel, 2.5 x SJW::: 26/2 54mg seroquel, 2 x SJW::::21/3 43mg seroquel, 1 x 2700SJW :::: 23/4 36mg seroquel 1 x 1800 SJW15/5 33mg seroquel, 1 x SJW:::: 28/5 30mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::; 18/6 25mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::::, 11/7 21mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::, 26/7 18mg seroquel 1/2 SJW:::, 9/8 12mg seroquel :::, 16/8 6mg seroquel ;;;;, 12/9 0 jump. 23/9 3mg....., 27/9 0mg. Reinstated, 6mg, then 12mg............. LIGHTBULB MOMENT, I have MTHFR 2x mutations. CFS and issues with MOULD in my home. So I left home, and working 150km away during week, loving it. Oh was hard, panic attacks first week, gone now, along with the mould issues. Link to comment
btdt Posted June 9, 2015 Share Posted June 9, 2015 Very nice answer. Thank you Fresh. Now I will post the question again here as Petunia has requested. I'm very concerned that because I am on a very low dose of Ativan (1 mg for only 1 month) and tapering, that it is slowing my Paxil progress. Any thoughts please? taking 1mg for only one month is slowing my paxil progress? for someone raised in California? sorry your English skills are sadly lacking? Ang some people become hypersensitive to drugs after quitting antidepressants... I am hypersensitive that is how I know it is very real. WARNING THIS WILL BE LONG Had a car accident in 85 Codeine was the pain med when I was release from hosp continuous use till 89 Given PROZAC by a specialist to help with nerve pain in my leg 89-90 not sure which year Was not told a thing about it being a psych med thought it was a pain killer no info about psych side effects I went nuts had hallucinations. As I had a head injury and was diagnosed with a concussion in 85 I was sent to a head injury clinic in 1990 five years after the accident. I don't think they knew I had been on prozac I did not think it a big deal and never did finish the bottle of pills. I had tests of course lots of them. Was put into a pain clinic and given amitriptyline which stopped the withdrawal but had many side effects. But I could sleep something I had not done in a very long time the pain lessened. My mother got cancer in 94 they switched my meds to Zoloft to help deal with this pressure as I was her main care giver she died in 96. I stopped zoloft in 96 had withdrawal was put on paxil went nutty quit it ct put on resperidol quit it ct had withdrawal was put on Effexor... 2years later celexa was added 20mg then increased to 40mg huge personality change went wild. Did too fast taper off Celexa 05 as I felt unwell for a long time prior... quit Effexor 150mg ct 07 found ****** 8 months into withdrawal learned some things was banned from there in 08 have kept learning since. there is really not enough room here to put my history but I have a lot of opinions about a lot of things especially any of the drugs mentioned above. One thing I would like to add here is this tidbit ALL OPIATES INCREASE SEROTONIN it is not a huge jump to being in chronic pain to being put on an ssri/snri and opiates will affect your antidepressants and your thinking. As I do not update much I will put my quit date Nov. 17 2007 I quit Effexor cold turkey. http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1096-introducing-myself-btdt/ There is a crack in everything ..That's how the light gets in Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Skyler Posted June 9, 2015 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted June 9, 2015 This seems to have gotten somewhat confused. PillP has been advised by the mods to hold ativan for 6 months (5 months now), and let the Paxil withdrawal symptoms settle down before he starts to taper. For a reason none of us understands, he mistakenly believes taking Ativan is slowing his recovery from the PAWs he has from Paxil, when the opposite is true. This being that tapering Ativan too soon will result in more withdrawal symptoms and prolong PAWs from Paxil. As always, LISTEN TO YOUR BODY! A proud supporter of the 10% (or slower) rule. Requip - 3/16 ZERO Total time on 25 years. Lyrica: 8/15 ZERO Total time on 7 or 8 yrs.BENZO FREE 10/13 (started tapering 7/10) Total time on 25 years. Read my intro thread here, and check the about me section. "No matter how cynical you get, it's almost impossible to keep up." Lily Tomlin Link to comment
Mentor ang Posted June 9, 2015 Mentor Share Posted June 9, 2015 Ok, I really, really am in desperate need of help. I am having what I believe is just a return of my condition pre anti-depressants. I remember well what I felt like before medicine. I had no will to live. I just laid in bed and was very anxious. I truly felt I'd be better off dead. This is how I feel now. It really feels the same after almost eight months off this drug. I remember first getting depressed when I was around eleven. By the time I was thirteen I was smoking weed everyday and as time went on I was drinking and smoking weed. Then to the AD. Now off eight months and seems everything is returning. This is not mild. This is VERY STRESSING, GOING OUT OF MY MIND CRAZY STUFF. VERY, VERY DEPRESSED. Many days over the past month have a almost resigned myself to check into a mental hospital but that has terrified me as well. But here I am again feeling very hopeless that this is a life long condition to which there is no way out. I am feeling hopeless. I eat very well, exercise, sleep eight hours, I have a psychotherapist. I am seriously thinking I need medicine to live some kind of normal life. I surely don't have one now. Life is very bad. It seems to be getting worse. Maybe an hour or two of less depression once and a while but nothing more. Look you were drinking and doing weed at age thirteen, after being depressed at age eleven, you have had a difficult life...did you go on AD then? Look that is a long time on Antidepressants.......... You are now 51? with prostate infection? Everyone here will support you. Everything now will be better, better than those days......you felt you wanted to be dead? that was the weed and the alcohol... Now you eat well, sleep well, exercise, you are DOING WELL! you go to a psychotherapist, well done. Many people battling this depression, on this site, can not leave the house.. Well done! I you achieve all these things, do you really think you need medication... I think you are doing wonderfully well. Give yourself a pat on the back!! Well done! But opnly YOU can judge. It is not a lifelong condition, you are doing well, good luck! But if you feel so depressed you get seriously suicidal, yes check into a mental hospital, what is your closest one? If you are not sure, ask members here, I am sure they can recommend, if it gets that bad for you. We all have our limitations, sometimes if you feel so desperate, that is the only choice. But remember every day will improve.... 1992 Dothiepin 375mg 8 weeks, exhaustion/depression. Serotonin syndrome, oh yes! seizures . Fell pregnant, 3rd baby, Nitrous Oxide, 3 weeks mental hospital pp psychosis. zoloft tegretol. Feb 1996 ct tegretol, tapered Zoloft 8 weeks. as (unexpectedly) pregnant. Steven died after 3 days.(Zolft HLHS baby). 98 had run in with Paxil, 2 tablets, 3 weeks taper, survived.2005..menopause? exhausted again. Zyprexa, mad in three days, fallout.... Seroquel, Effexor, tegretol, and 8 years of self destruction. Failed taper.Damn 1/4 valium... nuts again! .fallout, zoloft 100mg seroquol 400mg mirtazapine 45 mg tegretol 400mg. Mid 14 3 month taper. Nov 14 CRASH.Mid 15 .... 75mg seroquel, 3 x 1800mg SJW 2 week window end of December followed by 6 week wave5/2 68mg seroquel, 2.5 x 1800mg SJW::::20/2 61mg seroquel, 2.5 x SJW::: 26/2 54mg seroquel, 2 x SJW::::21/3 43mg seroquel, 1 x 2700SJW :::: 23/4 36mg seroquel 1 x 1800 SJW15/5 33mg seroquel, 1 x SJW:::: 28/5 30mg seroquel, 1 x SJW::::; 18/6 25mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::::, 11/7 21mg seroquel 1/2 SJW::, 26/7 18mg seroquel 1/2 SJW:::, 9/8 12mg seroquel :::, 16/8 6mg seroquel ;;;;, 12/9 0 jump. 23/9 3mg....., 27/9 0mg. Reinstated, 6mg, then 12mg............. LIGHTBULB MOMENT, I have MTHFR 2x mutations. CFS and issues with MOULD in my home. So I left home, and working 150km away during week, loving it. Oh was hard, panic attacks first week, gone now, along with the mould issues. Link to comment
btdt Posted June 9, 2015 Share Posted June 9, 2015 I see what you mean 5-6 months of stability before taper is a good thing... maybe even longer if he feels he needs it. There is no amount of stable that is too much, in my opinion if it works it works. Avoiding more drugs and hosp is best if you can again my opinion... get stable have some peace... wait.. distract... redirect you energies and deep relaxation... we are all on here gabbing ... Your quiet but will have lots to read when you come back... peace WARNING THIS WILL BE LONG Had a car accident in 85 Codeine was the pain med when I was release from hosp continuous use till 89 Given PROZAC by a specialist to help with nerve pain in my leg 89-90 not sure which year Was not told a thing about it being a psych med thought it was a pain killer no info about psych side effects I went nuts had hallucinations. As I had a head injury and was diagnosed with a concussion in 85 I was sent to a head injury clinic in 1990 five years after the accident. I don't think they knew I had been on prozac I did not think it a big deal and never did finish the bottle of pills. I had tests of course lots of them. Was put into a pain clinic and given amitriptyline which stopped the withdrawal but had many side effects. But I could sleep something I had not done in a very long time the pain lessened. My mother got cancer in 94 they switched my meds to Zoloft to help deal with this pressure as I was her main care giver she died in 96. I stopped zoloft in 96 had withdrawal was put on paxil went nutty quit it ct put on resperidol quit it ct had withdrawal was put on Effexor... 2years later celexa was added 20mg then increased to 40mg huge personality change went wild. Did too fast taper off Celexa 05 as I felt unwell for a long time prior... quit Effexor 150mg ct 07 found ****** 8 months into withdrawal learned some things was banned from there in 08 have kept learning since. there is really not enough room here to put my history but I have a lot of opinions about a lot of things especially any of the drugs mentioned above. One thing I would like to add here is this tidbit ALL OPIATES INCREASE SEROTONIN it is not a huge jump to being in chronic pain to being put on an ssri/snri and opiates will affect your antidepressants and your thinking. As I do not update much I will put my quit date Nov. 17 2007 I quit Effexor cold turkey. http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1096-introducing-myself-btdt/ There is a crack in everything ..That's how the light gets in Link to comment
pillprob Posted June 13, 2015 Author Share Posted June 13, 2015 Here is the latest one I'm dealing with that has spurred my anxiety and panic for the last few months. It's the adhedonia and apathy. These are the real killers that discourage me to the point that I just say to myself, What is the point? Please tell me truthfully, does this ever go away.? Will I ever have the zest that I seemed to have lost by these drugs? Started Paxil for major depression at around 25. Up to 60 mg fast. Started weening at around 22nd year on it. Was cutting tiny bits on a very accurate pharmacy scale weekly and sometimes by weekly. Took around a year and a half. When I got to 10 mg, I tapered off of that in about 7 or 8 weeks. Too fast Stopped Paxil Oct 17 2014 At approximately six months off Paxil after a short course of antibiotics, developed major panic anxiety attacks. Started taking 1 mg of Ativan for about 3 weeks for this. Then on forth week tried to take Ativan ever other day or every two days. Stated experiencing withdrawal. Now I am trying to stabilize on .75, by taking .25 every 8 hours (.25 at 7am, .25 at 3pm .25 11pm) Link to comment
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