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Deep emotional pain and crying spells, spontaneous weeping


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ADMIN NOTE Also see

 

Non-drug techniques to cope with emotional symptoms

 

Neuro-emotions

 

Dealing With Emotional Spirals

 


I would like to know if any of you have found and used any good techniques for coping with crying spells? What is the best way to stop them in their tracks?

 

This symptom is the worst for me: Unctrollable crying spells that can last for hours and hours. I cry at the drop of a hat. Almost any sad or negative thought can trigger it. And with withdrawal there are so many negative and sad thoughts. Once the water-works starts, I just don't know how to stop it. It's like a waterfall that has it's own momentum.  After crying for hours, I can barely function.  It's awful.

 

Of course the doctors and therapists all want me to raise my medication dose or try another one.  But I've been tapering for over a year from 5 mg of Lexapro down to .35 mg. I'm tapering 5% per week. But the dose is so low, it's probably like nothing.  It doesn't make sense to raise it. Below 5 mg, it really doesn't do much.  And of course than the side effects start.  

 

 I've been learning about Cognitive Behavioral Therapy lately. After 2 years in therapy and getting angry with my therapist, at my insistence she's finally teaching me about CBT.  She of course absolutely has no  understanding of the severity of symptoms triggered by withdrawal. I think I will giver my therapist and my psychiatrist a copy of this

http://npanth.wordpress.com/2012/03/14/phases-of-ssri-withdrawal/

to help them understand better.

Edited by Altostrata
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2005-2008: Effexor; 1/2008 Tapered 3 months, then quit. 7/2008-2009 Reinstated Effexor (crying spells at start of new job.)
2009-3/2013: Switched to Pristiq 50 mg then 100 mg
3/2013: Switched to Lexapro 10mg. Cut down to 5 mg. CT for 2 weeks then reinstated for 6 weeks
8/2013-8/2014: Tapering Lexapro (Lots of withdrawal symptoms)
11/2014 -8/2015: Developed severe insomnia and uncontrollable daily crying spells
12/2014-6/2015: Tried Ambien, Klonopin,Ativan, Lunesta, Sonata, Trazadone, Seroquel, Rameron, Gabapentin - Developed Anxiety disorder, PTSD, and Psychogenic Myoclonus
7/2015-1/2016: Reinstated Lexapro 2 mg (mild improvement, but crying spells still present)

1/2016-5/2017: Lexapro 5 mg ( helped a lot, but poor stress tolerance & depressive episodes)

5/20/2017 - Raised dose to Lexapro 10 mg due to lingering depression(Total of 2 failed tapers & severe PAWS)

9/11/2018 - Present: Still on 10 mg Lexapro and mostly recovered.(Extremely sensitive to stress which triggers Myoclonus.)

Intro page: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4149-lilu-depression-worsened-by-meds/

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areyouthere

 

 

Of course the doctors and therapists all want me to raise my medication dose or try another one.  But I've been tapering for over a year from 5 mg of Lexapro down to .35 mg. I'm tapering 5% per week. But the dose is so low, it's probably like nothing.  

Congrats on the taper! My understanding is that at the lower doses it becomes harder. Do you think slowing down your taper with longer holds would help?

 

I am flat in emotions and at a much higher dose than you ( 13.8 mg) and so when I tear up it is like a celebration… WOW!! I can feel!!

 

Sorry you are going through ths.

 

RU

Fall 1995 xanax, zoloft. switched to Serzone

1996- spring 2003serzone/ xanax/ lightbox.

b]Fall 2003- Fall 2004? Lexapro 10 mg. Light box /4 mg. xanax.[/b]

2004 - Fall of 2009 10 mg Lex, 150 mg Wellbutrin XL % 4 mg xanax

November 2009- Sept. 2011 10 mg lex., 300 Well. XL, 4 mg Xanax [/b

Sept.2012- July 2012 20 mg Lex 300 Well. XL, 4 mg Xanax

My mantra " go slow & with the flow "

3/2/13.. Began equal dosing 5 Xs /day xanax, while simultaneously incorporating a 2.5 % drop ( from 3.5 mg/day to 3.4 mg/day)

4/6/13 dropped from 300 mg. Wellbutrin XL to 150 mg. Difficult but DONE! Down to 3.3 mg xanax/ day / 6/10/13 3 mg xanax/day; 7/15/2013 2.88mg xanax/day.

10/ 1/2013...... 2.5 mg xanax… ( switched to tablets again) WOO HOO!!!!!! Holding here… cont. with Lexapro.

1/ 2/2014.. tapered to 18mg ( by weight) of a 26 mg ( by weight) pill of 20 mg tab. lexapro. goal is 13mg (by weight OR 10 mg by ingredient content) and STOPPED. Feeling very down with unbalanced, unpredictable WD symptoms.

1/2/2014- ??? Taking a brain-healing break from tapering anything after actively tapering something for 1.5 years. So… daily doses as of 2/2/2014: 18 mg by weight Lex, 150 mg Well. XL, 2.5 mg xanax, down from 26 mg by weight Lex., 300 mg well. XL, 4 mg xanax in August, 2012. I'll take it. :) 5/8/14 started equivalent dose liquid./ tabs. 5/13/14 1.5 % cut.

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Congrats on the taper! My understanding is that at the lower doses it becomes harder. Do you think slowing down your taper with longer holds would help?

 

To use a very clinical term...my brain must be going bonkers.  After a month of crying spells and feeling suicidal, it all just stopped. Poof just like that. I've had 3 days now of feeling perfectly happy and content.  No negative thoughts, no crying, no insomnia.  So so weird.  So bizarre. I'm so glad I hung in there and didn't succumb to trying yet another antidepressant!   This really gives me hope that there will be a time when my brain and my emotions will be totally fine.  And it gives me more resolve to hang in there.  

Reading this article helped to remind me that what I'm going through is all part of withdrawal and is perfectly normal. That it happens to everyone and is just a phase, and not ME.  http://npanth.wordpress.com/2012/03/14/phases-of-ssri-withdrawal/

2005-2008: Effexor; 1/2008 Tapered 3 months, then quit. 7/2008-2009 Reinstated Effexor (crying spells at start of new job.)
2009-3/2013: Switched to Pristiq 50 mg then 100 mg
3/2013: Switched to Lexapro 10mg. Cut down to 5 mg. CT for 2 weeks then reinstated for 6 weeks
8/2013-8/2014: Tapering Lexapro (Lots of withdrawal symptoms)
11/2014 -8/2015: Developed severe insomnia and uncontrollable daily crying spells
12/2014-6/2015: Tried Ambien, Klonopin,Ativan, Lunesta, Sonata, Trazadone, Seroquel, Rameron, Gabapentin - Developed Anxiety disorder, PTSD, and Psychogenic Myoclonus
7/2015-1/2016: Reinstated Lexapro 2 mg (mild improvement, but crying spells still present)

1/2016-5/2017: Lexapro 5 mg ( helped a lot, but poor stress tolerance & depressive episodes)

5/20/2017 - Raised dose to Lexapro 10 mg due to lingering depression(Total of 2 failed tapers & severe PAWS)

9/11/2018 - Present: Still on 10 mg Lexapro and mostly recovered.(Extremely sensitive to stress which triggers Myoclonus.)

Intro page: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4149-lilu-depression-worsened-by-meds/

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I am flat in emotions and at a much higher dose than you ( 13.8 mg) and so when I tear up it is like a celebration… WOW!! I can feel!!

I remember not crying for a year when I was on Pristiq.  I don't remember feeling flat. Maybe I was. But considering that I am prone to crying spells, I did not miss them at all.  Being moved to tears is one thing, but having crying spells that can last 5 hours is a totally different monster.  It feels utterly hopeless. Completely engulfed in total despair and darkness.  Unable to stop it, I feel desperate to do just about anything to make it stop.  It is when I am most vulnerable and susceptible.  Even my therapist and psych doc don't know what to do with me.  

 

I've been going to a Dialectical  Behavioral Therapy group for over a year, and their Distress Tolerance handout is totally useless for times like these.  I really don't get how DBT therapy is helpful for those who are suicidal. I'm guessing that most people don't commit suicide when they are having crying spells.  It seems that most people who commit suicide are very sure and calm and deliberate about it, and plan it ahead of time.  I've never been in that state. If I'm calm, I'm rational. But if I'm crying, all bets are off.

2005-2008: Effexor; 1/2008 Tapered 3 months, then quit. 7/2008-2009 Reinstated Effexor (crying spells at start of new job.)
2009-3/2013: Switched to Pristiq 50 mg then 100 mg
3/2013: Switched to Lexapro 10mg. Cut down to 5 mg. CT for 2 weeks then reinstated for 6 weeks
8/2013-8/2014: Tapering Lexapro (Lots of withdrawal symptoms)
11/2014 -8/2015: Developed severe insomnia and uncontrollable daily crying spells
12/2014-6/2015: Tried Ambien, Klonopin,Ativan, Lunesta, Sonata, Trazadone, Seroquel, Rameron, Gabapentin - Developed Anxiety disorder, PTSD, and Psychogenic Myoclonus
7/2015-1/2016: Reinstated Lexapro 2 mg (mild improvement, but crying spells still present)

1/2016-5/2017: Lexapro 5 mg ( helped a lot, but poor stress tolerance & depressive episodes)

5/20/2017 - Raised dose to Lexapro 10 mg due to lingering depression(Total of 2 failed tapers & severe PAWS)

9/11/2018 - Present: Still on 10 mg Lexapro and mostly recovered.(Extremely sensitive to stress which triggers Myoclonus.)

Intro page: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4149-lilu-depression-worsened-by-meds/

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  • 3 months later...

Does anybody else have severe crying spells as part of their withdrawal?  Sometimes my crying spells can last an entire day.  And nothing that I try to do seems to stop them. Not even taking a walk in nature.

I think Ambien has been contributing to the crying spells lately. But I have nothing else that works for insomnia.  Hypnotherapy used to work, but for some reason has stopped working. I don't know if my mind has just gotten used to the script.

Recently I tried a new drug for sleep called Rozerem. My God, it was awful. I felt so tired and sluggish the next day, it was like a muscle relaxant. The drowsiness lasted two days.  It seems that I'm becoming more and more hypersensitive to meds, as many of you report.

Yet when I wake up at 2am and can't fall back asleep, by 6 or 7 am I'm angry, anxious and panicky. Then the crying starts.  It's a vicious circle.

2005-2008: Effexor; 1/2008 Tapered 3 months, then quit. 7/2008-2009 Reinstated Effexor (crying spells at start of new job.)
2009-3/2013: Switched to Pristiq 50 mg then 100 mg
3/2013: Switched to Lexapro 10mg. Cut down to 5 mg. CT for 2 weeks then reinstated for 6 weeks
8/2013-8/2014: Tapering Lexapro (Lots of withdrawal symptoms)
11/2014 -8/2015: Developed severe insomnia and uncontrollable daily crying spells
12/2014-6/2015: Tried Ambien, Klonopin,Ativan, Lunesta, Sonata, Trazadone, Seroquel, Rameron, Gabapentin - Developed Anxiety disorder, PTSD, and Psychogenic Myoclonus
7/2015-1/2016: Reinstated Lexapro 2 mg (mild improvement, but crying spells still present)

1/2016-5/2017: Lexapro 5 mg ( helped a lot, but poor stress tolerance & depressive episodes)

5/20/2017 - Raised dose to Lexapro 10 mg due to lingering depression(Total of 2 failed tapers & severe PAWS)

9/11/2018 - Present: Still on 10 mg Lexapro and mostly recovered.(Extremely sensitive to stress which triggers Myoclonus.)

Intro page: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4149-lilu-depression-worsened-by-meds/

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  • Administrator

Many people have reported intermittent weeping as a withdrawal symptom. I had this myself.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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Many people have reported intermittent weeping as a withdrawal symptom. I had this myself.

Thanks for the reply, Alto. "Intermittent weeping" is something I could handle. But crying 12 hours straight, with a few breaks in between, is just insane.

2005-2008: Effexor; 1/2008 Tapered 3 months, then quit. 7/2008-2009 Reinstated Effexor (crying spells at start of new job.)
2009-3/2013: Switched to Pristiq 50 mg then 100 mg
3/2013: Switched to Lexapro 10mg. Cut down to 5 mg. CT for 2 weeks then reinstated for 6 weeks
8/2013-8/2014: Tapering Lexapro (Lots of withdrawal symptoms)
11/2014 -8/2015: Developed severe insomnia and uncontrollable daily crying spells
12/2014-6/2015: Tried Ambien, Klonopin,Ativan, Lunesta, Sonata, Trazadone, Seroquel, Rameron, Gabapentin - Developed Anxiety disorder, PTSD, and Psychogenic Myoclonus
7/2015-1/2016: Reinstated Lexapro 2 mg (mild improvement, but crying spells still present)

1/2016-5/2017: Lexapro 5 mg ( helped a lot, but poor stress tolerance & depressive episodes)

5/20/2017 - Raised dose to Lexapro 10 mg due to lingering depression(Total of 2 failed tapers & severe PAWS)

9/11/2018 - Present: Still on 10 mg Lexapro and mostly recovered.(Extremely sensitive to stress which triggers Myoclonus.)

Intro page: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4149-lilu-depression-worsened-by-meds/

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WinningThrough

Lilu, I get these too. When I first came off the drugs, I was crying hysterically for hours on end. I couldn't believe that a human being was capable of that many tears! Recently, the crying spells went away but I got hit with a massive wave 3 weeks ago and I'm getting them again. Perhaps not so often, though, or as long lasting.

 

A lot of benzo people get massive crying spells.

The only way out is through.

 

Aug 2013 - Augmentin leading to akathisia

Sept-Nov 2013 - Citalopram 20mg, severe reaction, off at 5mg. Valium 4mg, prn

Oct 2013 - 5 zopiclone tablets, 7.5mg

End Nov 2013-end Feb 2014, Seroquel, top dose 150mg, off at 25mg

End Nov 2013-early march 2014, Zoloft 100mg top dose, off at 25mg

End Dec-2013-early April 2014, lorazepam 1mg prn

April 3rd 2014 zoloft 5mg for a few days. 18/4/14 - zoloft, 1mg. Came off at 0.35 mg,14th June 2014

29 June 2014 - 1mg lorazepam, last ever

29 June 2014 - med free

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Lilu, I get these too. When I first came off the drugs, I was crying hysterically for hours on end. I couldn't believe that a human being was capable of that many tears! Recently, the crying spells went away but I got hit with a massive wave 3 weeks ago and I'm getting them again. Perhaps not so often, though, or as long lasting.

 

A lot of benzo people get massive crying spells.

Well that's good to know. Right now, I think my crying spells are related to insomnia, sleep deprivation, and using Ambien.  It's been a vicious circle pretty much ever since I finished my taper in August.  Oh how I want to sleep. And oh how I want to stop using Ambien. I really do see a direct correlation, but nothing else seems to work. I don't know why Ambien started giving me crying spells and worsening my depression, but that's what it seems to do the last couple of years. I wonder if Ambien and benzos are related in some way.  

Recently I've been wondering if using Xanax back in 2002 had something to do with the onset of my clinical depression. I've always blamed Reglan for that. But recently I remembered that I had been using Xanax for 5 months around that time. I quit after it started giving me hyperacusis and I couldn't tolerate even going to the store because the buzzing of the fluorescent lights sounded so loud.  I didn't know anything about these drugs or withdrawal back then.  I had quite a few crying spells back then, deep depression, paranoia type feelings of future doom, fear, thoughts of suicide.  Reglan is can cause these, but now I wonder if my 5 month use of Xanax was a major contributor to that as well.  Ugghh...if only I knew then, what I know now. These days I use Klonopin, a benzo, on & off instead of using Ambien. But it's so long-acting, and I'm not sure how it's really affecting me.  God, I just want to sleep.....

2005-2008: Effexor; 1/2008 Tapered 3 months, then quit. 7/2008-2009 Reinstated Effexor (crying spells at start of new job.)
2009-3/2013: Switched to Pristiq 50 mg then 100 mg
3/2013: Switched to Lexapro 10mg. Cut down to 5 mg. CT for 2 weeks then reinstated for 6 weeks
8/2013-8/2014: Tapering Lexapro (Lots of withdrawal symptoms)
11/2014 -8/2015: Developed severe insomnia and uncontrollable daily crying spells
12/2014-6/2015: Tried Ambien, Klonopin,Ativan, Lunesta, Sonata, Trazadone, Seroquel, Rameron, Gabapentin - Developed Anxiety disorder, PTSD, and Psychogenic Myoclonus
7/2015-1/2016: Reinstated Lexapro 2 mg (mild improvement, but crying spells still present)

1/2016-5/2017: Lexapro 5 mg ( helped a lot, but poor stress tolerance & depressive episodes)

5/20/2017 - Raised dose to Lexapro 10 mg due to lingering depression(Total of 2 failed tapers & severe PAWS)

9/11/2018 - Present: Still on 10 mg Lexapro and mostly recovered.(Extremely sensitive to stress which triggers Myoclonus.)

Intro page: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4149-lilu-depression-worsened-by-meds/

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The last two nights I fell asleep without any medication what-so-ever. No benadryl, or 5htp, or klonopin, or ambien.  I slept thru the night without waking. Woke up fully rested.

What did I do differently?  I did Qi Gong (pronounced chi gong).  I did 20 min of an exercise video that I taped from a special on Public Television.  Lee Holden "Qi Gong: The Flow Continues" 

https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=Lee+Holden+Qi+Gong

 

I never did Chi Gong before, and I must say it's really quite amazing in the way that it both calms and energizes. I like that I'm able to do it even though I'm not in shape. I like that you can do it standing up and it's all continuous gentle movement. I enjoyed it much more than Yoga, which I find way too difficult to do, even though I'm pretty flexible.

 

Yesterday, I didn't do it in the morning. But when I felt wired, anxious, and unable to relax to go to sleep, I got up and just moved my body so as to get all the negative and toxic energy and thoughts out. I did some of the Qi Gong movements from memory and also just shaking it all out. It worked. Yay!  And even though I didn't get the 8 hours that I need last night, I still feel fully rested.

 

Omg, this makes me feel so hopeful. Now I just need to commit to doing it everyday.

2005-2008: Effexor; 1/2008 Tapered 3 months, then quit. 7/2008-2009 Reinstated Effexor (crying spells at start of new job.)
2009-3/2013: Switched to Pristiq 50 mg then 100 mg
3/2013: Switched to Lexapro 10mg. Cut down to 5 mg. CT for 2 weeks then reinstated for 6 weeks
8/2013-8/2014: Tapering Lexapro (Lots of withdrawal symptoms)
11/2014 -8/2015: Developed severe insomnia and uncontrollable daily crying spells
12/2014-6/2015: Tried Ambien, Klonopin,Ativan, Lunesta, Sonata, Trazadone, Seroquel, Rameron, Gabapentin - Developed Anxiety disorder, PTSD, and Psychogenic Myoclonus
7/2015-1/2016: Reinstated Lexapro 2 mg (mild improvement, but crying spells still present)

1/2016-5/2017: Lexapro 5 mg ( helped a lot, but poor stress tolerance & depressive episodes)

5/20/2017 - Raised dose to Lexapro 10 mg due to lingering depression(Total of 2 failed tapers & severe PAWS)

9/11/2018 - Present: Still on 10 mg Lexapro and mostly recovered.(Extremely sensitive to stress which triggers Myoclonus.)

Intro page: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4149-lilu-depression-worsened-by-meds/

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Great suggestion, Lilu. Please start a topic about Qi Gong.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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  • 4 months later...

Can someone, anyone, please tell me how long crying spells last. I have been off Paxil for 4 months (took it for 9 years) now and everything makes me cry. Ive been feeling really sad too (off and on). Im contemplating starting back up on it just to have some relief and get back to feeling normal. I dont want to that. I just dont know if this is just how it is going to be or if it will get better. If it will get better how long does it take? Four months is a long time and I just need to know there will be a light at the end of the tunnel and how long the tunnel is. I just dont know how long I can hold off.

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ADropInTheOcean

@Lulia, no one knows, it is different for everyone. I am 18 months off, took them the same amount of time as you and still and got them along with many other symptoms(see my signature), some got ride of them after a few months some have them a much longer period of time. And 4 months off seems an eternity because you suffer but it really isn't a long time since you took Paxil for 9 YEARS ! 9 years of modified brain chemistry isn't going to fix so quit.

Paxil is especially known to cause long withdrawals, even wiki says up to 18 months in some cases. Just try to hold on an go on with your life as much as you can.

 

" Most cases of discontinuation syndrome last between one and four weeks, are relatively mild, and resolve on their own; in rare cases symptoms can be severe or extended.[1] Paroxetine (Paxil) and venlafaxine (Effexor) seem to be particularly difficult to discontinue and prolonged withdrawal syndrome lasting over 18 months have been reported with paroxetine.[5][6][7] "

On various meds since 2004(Luvox, Paxil-5 years, Zoloft, Trazodone, etc) for anxiety.
CT Luvox 20th September 2013, started Klonopin 1mg (now on 0.25mg). Hellish depression, burning head, crying spells,extreme emotional rollercoaster, severe fibro-neuropathy like pains-never had any of this prior to meds. 31 months off and its worse and worse no life AT ALL.

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WinningThrough

Lucia, crying spells were a biggy for me. They hit as soon as I came off zoloft in March 2014. They were very severe and I couldn't control them. I wouldn't often wake up with them and they woul go on for hours. Sometimes they got so bad that I was sick or couldn't breathe.

 

They would sometimes stop, only to start up again.

 

Crying spells went on for about a year for me, with breaks. Currently I haven't had one for over three weeks.

 

Yours will go away in time.

The only way out is through.

 

Aug 2013 - Augmentin leading to akathisia

Sept-Nov 2013 - Citalopram 20mg, severe reaction, off at 5mg. Valium 4mg, prn

Oct 2013 - 5 zopiclone tablets, 7.5mg

End Nov 2013-end Feb 2014, Seroquel, top dose 150mg, off at 25mg

End Nov 2013-early march 2014, Zoloft 100mg top dose, off at 25mg

End Dec-2013-early April 2014, lorazepam 1mg prn

April 3rd 2014 zoloft 5mg for a few days. 18/4/14 - zoloft, 1mg. Came off at 0.35 mg,14th June 2014

29 June 2014 - 1mg lorazepam, last ever

29 June 2014 - med free

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WinningThrough

I should have read the above before I posted! I meant to say I would often wake up with them. I was straight into crying as soon as I opened my eyes.

The only way out is through.

 

Aug 2013 - Augmentin leading to akathisia

Sept-Nov 2013 - Citalopram 20mg, severe reaction, off at 5mg. Valium 4mg, prn

Oct 2013 - 5 zopiclone tablets, 7.5mg

End Nov 2013-end Feb 2014, Seroquel, top dose 150mg, off at 25mg

End Nov 2013-early march 2014, Zoloft 100mg top dose, off at 25mg

End Dec-2013-early April 2014, lorazepam 1mg prn

April 3rd 2014 zoloft 5mg for a few days. 18/4/14 - zoloft, 1mg. Came off at 0.35 mg,14th June 2014

29 June 2014 - 1mg lorazepam, last ever

29 June 2014 - med free

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I had crying spells while tapering Lexapro. But I also found that my crying spells were magnified and often caused by Ambien and Klonopin, which I have been using for insomnia for the last 15 years.  It took me a long time to accept the fact that all the hypnotics or sleep drugs, like Ambien, Lunesta, Sonata, or benzos like Ativan and Klonopin - all caused me to have uncontrollable crying spells after I had finished my taper. I guess that is part of the protracted withdrawal that I am still going through. Now, I find that any central nervous system depressant, even Mirtazapine (Rameron), which is an antidepressant, gives me crying spells. I've even become sensitive to antihistamines and decongestants. Benadryl recently made me restless and agitated and I was up all night. Not sure about Zyrtec at this point. (I need to take it to help with terrible allergies that I have year round.) 

It's been a very long journey. It's been a very long protracted withdrawal. But it is slowly getting better and better. You just have to hang in there and use every stress-management and distress-tolerance skill that might help.

2005-2008: Effexor; 1/2008 Tapered 3 months, then quit. 7/2008-2009 Reinstated Effexor (crying spells at start of new job.)
2009-3/2013: Switched to Pristiq 50 mg then 100 mg
3/2013: Switched to Lexapro 10mg. Cut down to 5 mg. CT for 2 weeks then reinstated for 6 weeks
8/2013-8/2014: Tapering Lexapro (Lots of withdrawal symptoms)
11/2014 -8/2015: Developed severe insomnia and uncontrollable daily crying spells
12/2014-6/2015: Tried Ambien, Klonopin,Ativan, Lunesta, Sonata, Trazadone, Seroquel, Rameron, Gabapentin - Developed Anxiety disorder, PTSD, and Psychogenic Myoclonus
7/2015-1/2016: Reinstated Lexapro 2 mg (mild improvement, but crying spells still present)

1/2016-5/2017: Lexapro 5 mg ( helped a lot, but poor stress tolerance & depressive episodes)

5/20/2017 - Raised dose to Lexapro 10 mg due to lingering depression(Total of 2 failed tapers & severe PAWS)

9/11/2018 - Present: Still on 10 mg Lexapro and mostly recovered.(Extremely sensitive to stress which triggers Myoclonus.)

Intro page: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4149-lilu-depression-worsened-by-meds/

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  • 3 months later...

Lucia, crying spells were a biggy for me. They hit as soon as I came off zoloft in March 2014. They were very severe and I couldn't control them. I wouldn't often wake up with them and they woul go on for hours. Sometimes they got so bad that I was sick or couldn't breathe.

 

They would sometimes stop, only to start up again.

 

Crying spells went on for about a year for me, with breaks. Currently I haven't had one for over three weeks.

 

Yours will go away in time.

Hmm...I am having the same sypmtoms right now with Remeron. Crying spells and Insomnia. Do you know anything that makes it better when I quit cold turkey from the medication?

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WinningThrough

I'm very sorry to hear this provize. I pretty much did a cold turkey too. My tapers were rapid and all over the place. The crying spells feel like they will never end but they will. I thought I'd have mine forever! And you know what? I haven't had any since February this year. That's over 4 months with no crying. And I really don't think they will come back.

 

I'm doing insomnia at the moment. It will pass as will your insomnia. It all means that healing is going on and when the healing is done, this will all go away.

The only way out is through.

 

Aug 2013 - Augmentin leading to akathisia

Sept-Nov 2013 - Citalopram 20mg, severe reaction, off at 5mg. Valium 4mg, prn

Oct 2013 - 5 zopiclone tablets, 7.5mg

End Nov 2013-end Feb 2014, Seroquel, top dose 150mg, off at 25mg

End Nov 2013-early march 2014, Zoloft 100mg top dose, off at 25mg

End Dec-2013-early April 2014, lorazepam 1mg prn

April 3rd 2014 zoloft 5mg for a few days. 18/4/14 - zoloft, 1mg. Came off at 0.35 mg,14th June 2014

29 June 2014 - 1mg lorazepam, last ever

29 June 2014 - med free

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manymoretodays

it's got to be a Lexapro withdrawal thing in reference to the first post.......mine is back........crying and I mean it is not just over the grieving type and why me stuff it is sometimes a reaction to simple kindnesses or someone telling me good stuff that they like about me or thinking about my grandniece I so want to travel and meet.....

 

it doesn't exhaust me anymore just is kind of annoying and don't want to share it with kind people because then they uber want to fix it or go all feeling sorry for me or else get into all the stuff that makes them WANT to cry and honestly........too much baggage for me really right now......i over absorb pretty easily too.

 

this round is easier if it is any consolation.  Don't fight it.........welcome it on in and it makes it so much less exhausting I have found.

 

heck i want to cry because i am being hit with wanting other people to have to suffer this way too......like it's their fault.......it isn't and that is so not how i want to end up.......all bitter and critical and unable to find joy in others happiness........i mean that is what is going to eventually enlarge my circle of positives and hope, feeling good just because others are.......keeping that going........in a healthy the cup really is halfway with water kind of ideation.

 

it IS hard stuff to acknowledge and try and welcome, then let go off.

 

maybe that relates.......hope so.  And here's a paper towel........sorry no tissues, just being economical.......lol........that is my cynical joke.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016. 

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider. manymoretodays

 

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I'm very sorry to hear this provize. I pretty much did a cold turkey too. My tapers were rapid and all over the place. The crying spells feel like they will never end but they will. I thought I'd have mine forever! And you know what? I haven't had any since February this year. That's over 4 months with no crying. And I really don't think they will come back.

 

I'm doing insomnia at the moment. It will pass as will your insomnia. It all means that healing is going on and when the healing is done, this will all go away.

My doctor also said that my blood tests, were all Ok. But I was found with an infection, with my ears and eardrums, all of the Emotional stress makes things worse. Even when we got difficult times in the family. The only thing remeron did good for me was a weight gain, but now I know that the weight loss is due to stress, I don't feel like myself at all right now.  How long were you on Remeron? INSOMNIA DISSAPEAR! I was also wrote onto melatonin, which helps to sleep, but I feel like it does not help. Bad english

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WinningThrough

I wasn't on remeron. The doctor wanted to put me on it but then said he couldn't because of my neutropenia. I meant that I pretty much cold turkeyed my other drugs. I hope you get some relief soon.

The only way out is through.

 

Aug 2013 - Augmentin leading to akathisia

Sept-Nov 2013 - Citalopram 20mg, severe reaction, off at 5mg. Valium 4mg, prn

Oct 2013 - 5 zopiclone tablets, 7.5mg

End Nov 2013-end Feb 2014, Seroquel, top dose 150mg, off at 25mg

End Nov 2013-early march 2014, Zoloft 100mg top dose, off at 25mg

End Dec-2013-early April 2014, lorazepam 1mg prn

April 3rd 2014 zoloft 5mg for a few days. 18/4/14 - zoloft, 1mg. Came off at 0.35 mg,14th June 2014

29 June 2014 - 1mg lorazepam, last ever

29 June 2014 - med free

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  • 10 months later...

I've read this link many times this week. What is not standing out to me are any indications of how long the intensity of crying and panic lasts for, for other as well as some strategies that help.

May 12th 2016 took last bead of effexor. 8 month taper.  Bridge = prozac 5mg, 300mg Lithium

May 31st took last of prozac. Lithium 300 mg, estrogen patch 150, magnesium.

June 14th reinstated 1mg Prozac due to intolerable emotional distress. Cont with lithium 300mg, 150 magnesium, re added omega 3, cont estrogen patch. June 15-july 5th had marked improvement of emotional wd symptoms, likely due to the reinstatement. July 5th intense emotional symptoms returned.

July 15 decreased 50 mg of lithium to see if it improved low heart rate.

July 19th - increased prozac to 1.5mg.

July 22 marked improvement of emotional symptoms...again, likely due to increase of prozac. However sudden agitation developed so decreased back down to 1.25mg prozac. Realizing increasing dose is dangerous because of these adverse effects and also seeing that wave is inevitable regardless of reinstatement.

Continuing 250 lithium, 1.25mg prozac, estrogen.

Oct 31st - continued 250 lithium, 1 mg prozac, estrogen patch.

Jan 2018  - off of prozac (bridge) as of Dec 2017.  Starting to taper Lithium 250 mg.  Will do 10% per month. 

May 2018 - lithium 115mg.  Still having waves but they aren’t as bad.  However, I really struggle with emotional symptoms about 1 week after a cut.  Even this past micro taper of 1.5% was tough.  That was after holding for a month.

dec 2018- 80mg lithium.  Tapering 1 mg per week since last June.  Symptoms improving overall but still very sensitive to light, sound, social stimulation and I cry a lot.

March 2019 - 65 mg lithium.  Still tapering 1mg per week.  

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Junglechicken

Yes I definitely have crying spells which are most pronounced before my monthly cycle and when a new physical symptom shows up (fear).

 

They just pop up and can last on and off throughout the day.

Dose History: 19 Feb 2014 - Escitalopram 10mg daily June 2015 - Started taper, 5mg every other day July 2015 - 5mg every 2 days August 2015 - 5mg every 3 days September 2015 - 5mg every 4 days Sept 14th - Completed tapering, but at 7 weeks "drug free" I suffered serious WD symptoms as a consequence of "incorrect" tapering. Nov 25 2015 - Re-instated Cipralex @ 2.5mg daily. WD symptoms faded. Held at this dose and experienced "windows and waves". 12 Oct 2017 Reduced dose to 1.25mg. 13 Mar 2018 Reduced dose to 0.625mg (approx.). 16 April 2018 0mg. Windows and waves triggered by stress (IBS/reflux, headaches, sinus issues) Aug 2019 Mirena coil fitted 6 Jan 2020 MAJOR Wave hit 19 months following last dose (protracted WD).  Symptoms listed below Mar 2020 Mirena coil removal.

Therapy: Nov 15th 2016 Re-started therapy Jan 19th 2017 Started CBT Dec 2017 Started listening to Hypnotherapy CD (self-esteem). Nov 2019 Started couples therapy.

Supplements: "Bioglan" Biotic Balance Ultimate Flora 10 billion CFU, live Bacteria, Probiotic, suitable for Vegetarians, with Lactobacillus Acidophilus, Lactobacillus Rhamnosus, Bifidobacterium Longum"Pukka" Vitalise a unique blend of 30 energising botanicals.

Diet: 16 April 2018 Detox cleanse / anti-candida for 90 days. Jan 2020 Started "small plate" diet (i.e child size portions).

Exercise: Stretching, Yoga, Pilates, Spinning, Elliptical/upper body workout, walking.

Medical Test Results: 4 Jan 2017 Homeopathic Treatment starts 24 Feb 2017 Started weight loss program 24 Mar 2017 Naturopathic Treatment + anti-Candida diet started due to suspected Candida Related Complex (CRC). DETOXED for 7 weeks to "re-set" gut. April 2017 "Genova Diagnostics" Comprehensive Stool Analysis NEGATIVE; Full Blood Count (Normal) / Blood Cholesterol: 5.6 (Borderline) / Blood Sugar (Normal) / 28 Jun 2017 FSH 8.2 / 14 Nov 2017 FSH 17.7 Dec 2017 Blood Cholesterol: 3.9 (Normal) / Kidney Function (Normal) / Blood Sugar (Normal). December 2017 "Genova Diagnostics" Food panel allergy (bloodwork) analysis - a few "VERY LOW/VL" allergens; Mar 2018 "Genova Diagnostics" SIBO urine analysis: High Level of Yeast/fungal markers found in small intestine but NO SIBO.  April 2018 Thyroid (Normal) / Full Blood Count (Normal) / FSH (Normal). 16 April 2018 Started anti-Candida diet - 3 month protocol.   25 March 2020 All test results "Normal". CRP" 5 mg/L (normal range to 0-5 mg/L).

Symptoms:  Flu-like symptoms, anxiety, anhedonia, sinus headaches right-side (severe), IBS issues/reflux (severe)**, tinnitus, fatigue, inner tremor, nausea, chills/hot flushes, pounding heart, muscular issues including stiff left hip flexor, intense anger, PSSD (ongoing).  **Histhamine intolerance (suspected).

 

Major Life Events: 

Re-located to UK from Canada: Jan 2016

My father died: 5:05pm, Monday 5 Feb 2018 Last Lexapro dose: 16 April 2018 (its now been over a year since I quit ADs)

Moved house: Friday 23rd February 2018  "Divorced" toxic Mother: Monday 26 March 2018 Starting working again: 19 November 2018

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Lilu and everyone who has experienced crying spells.  Im putting my hand up too.  My crying spells started 2 years before i was diagnosed with clinical depression.  Mine were mostly related to relationships going bad, the moment i think of how my then partner looked or talked to other women or was late in calling me or picking me up; insecurity and fear would build up in me, and once i had experienced enough of these episodes the spells would start and i would cry for days and days literally.  People didn't know how to help me, because i was inconsolable which then led to the diagnosis.  

 

I've been experiencing the same crying episodes now, worse before and a few days into my period.  I really thought i was over the crying episodes as i believe i have moved on and in a much much better place than i ever was, so when i began to have crying spells from 3 months after stopping AD's  I was really suprised to be experiencing these same old feelings.  I think i cried more because i was crying over the old feelings.  Im looking foward to therapy to help with these trigger thoughts which bring about the crying spells.  At times they come from no real trigger other than feeling hopeless.

 

We will get better though!

In 2001 - started on Carbamezapine (can't remember dose), Fluoexitine 20mg, Clanozepam (low dose) after a nervous breakdown.

In 2004 - abruptly stopped carbamezapine after falling pregnant.  

In 2009 - changed from Fluoexitine to Citalopram 20mg.

In 2014 - tappered off clanozepam.

In Aug 2015 - cold turkey off Citalopram :o

From Aug - Dec 2015 I had mostly flu-like symptoms and trouble sleeping. From Jan - April 2016 Emotional nightmare ensued, paranoia, excessive anxiety and tormenting thoughts, basically trying to manage these emotions and thoughts which are exhausting.  Lots of intense emotions followed by tears, at times howling when Im alone.In March 2016 I tried Choline & Inisitol, Vit B Complex, Using Aromatherapy, like Lavendar, Clary Sage and others.

In April STOPPED Choline & Inositol as I beleive it was giving me shakes and making me more anxious.  It also made me feel like i'd taken a benzo tablet making me feel sedated.  Reading - The Body Keeps Score by Bessel Van Der Kolk (recommended by a member on this group).

Symptoms - extreme low self esteem and insecurity, intense emotions and tearfulness. This is so so hard.  But im going to keep pushing.  Feel bad for my 2 girls and husband.  I don't want to be seen in this way, especially by the girls. Self-help : praying, meditating, breathing exercises and physical exercises.

Ceterizine (antihistamine) - I've been taking this for many years now for itchiness in my palms and feet.  I take them as and when I need them. JULY 2016 Dr Bach homeopathic remedies and 'rescue remedy'

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See the thread titled 

how to lower cortisol 

all the ideas and things tried already are in there.... 

 

epson salt bath...for sleep when you can't sleep lay down anyway and rest deep relaxation search it on utube it will be the first video... eft utube too the guy in the red shirt 

 

if you feel like you have had too much coffee jittery inside small amount of magnesium but for me the bath is better the coffee feeling is stopped in its tracks by taurine I learned this by trying tauring for migraines... 

WARNING THIS WILL BE LONG
Had a car accident in 85
Codeine was the pain med when I was release from hosp continuous use till 89
Given PROZAC by a specialist to help with nerve pain in my leg 89-90 not sure which year
Was not told a thing about it being a psych med thought it was a pain killer no info about psych side effects I went nuts had hallucinations. As I had a head injury and was diagnosed with a concussion in 85 I was sent to a head injury clinic in 1990 five years after the accident. I don't think they knew I had been on prozac I did not think it a big deal and never did finish the bottle of pills. I had tests of course lots of them. Was put into a pain clinic and given amitriptyline which stopped the withdrawal but had many side effects. But I could sleep something I had not done in a very long time the pain lessened. My mother got cancer in 94 they switched my meds to Zoloft to help deal with this pressure as I was her main care giver she died in 96. I stopped zoloft in 96 had withdrawal was put on paxil went nutty quit it ct put on resperidol quit it ct had withdrawal was put on Effexor... 2years later celexa was added 20mg then increased to 40mg huge personality change went wild. Did too fast taper off Celexa 05 as I felt unwell for a long time prior... quit Effexor 150mg ct 07 found ****** 8 months into withdrawal learned some things was banned from there in 08 have kept learning since. there is really not enough room here to put my history but I have a lot of opinions about a lot of things especially any of the drugs mentioned above.
One thing I would like to add here is this tidbit ALL OPIATES INCREASE SEROTONIN it is not a huge jump to being in chronic pain to being put on an ssri/snri and opiates will affect your antidepressants and your thinking.

As I do not update much I will put my quit date Nov. 17 2007 I quit Effexor cold turkey. 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1096-introducing-myself-btdt/

There is a crack in everything ..That's how the light gets in :)

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I've read this link many times this week. What is not standing out to me are any indications of how long the intensity of crying and panic lasts for, for other as well as some strategies that help.

 

I think the intensity and duration of crying spells will be different for everybody. We're all on different medications, dosages, and duration. We all have highly individual body and brain chemistry, which affects every aspect of withdrawal.

 

For me, the crying spells became progressively worse with the tapering of medication. If I went below 2 mg Lexapro I go worse, if I went back up, I got better. After I finished the taper, and developed severe insomnia, I was crying pretty much all day. This wasn't just  the kind of crying where you just tear-up a little on and off. No, this was full-blown uncontrollable inconsolable out-loud sobbing that felt like my soul was being ripped out of my chest. Tragic. Intense. Awful.  My eyes hurt every day and my vision was blurry because I was crying so much.  Then came night time which did not offer any respite from the suffering of the day. The unrelenting insomnia kept me tossing and turning, wide-eyed and panicked. 

 

I tried everything. Nothing helped. I tried every supplement suggested here and many prescription meds. I tried hypnosis, deep breathing, meditation, qigong, guided imagery, cognitive behavioral therapy, group therapy, talk therapy, and more.

 

Attempting to withdraw from psychiatric drugs after being on them for 10 years was a HUGE MISTAKE.  It robbed me of years off my life, my livelihood, money, friends, and worst of all my health. Because of the inordinate amount of crying that I engaged in everyday and the breakdown of my nervous system, I wound up with PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) and a Movement Disorder.  

 

I have since mostly recovered from all of the above. The only way to achieve this recovery was to go back on Lexapro. Aside from not going on antidepressants in the first place, this is the antidepressant I should have been on, not Effexor or Pristiq, which raised my anxiety and were barely effective.

 

As I went back on Lexapro, I used liquid generic Lexapro * to taper UP.  Within 3 weeks there was a marked improvement in my sleep. (I also stopped Klonopin and Ambien cold turkey). My crying spells significantly decreased at 2 mg. And my depression slowly began to lift. At 2.5 mg there was still occasional crying spells, but my sleep was steadily improving.  However it wasn't until I reached 4 mg where I really started to see a difference.  There have been no crying spells at 5 mg. Still I continued to be plagued by trauma memories of all my torturous experiences due to withdrawal.  I wish I had never attempted getting off antidepressants. 

 

Being on Lexapro 5 mg for 5 months now, I do not have crying spells anymore and I'm sleeping 8 to 10 hours per night. My nervous system has recovered and I don't have panic attacks or anxiety for no reason.  I can drink strong coffee again! My movement disorder, Functional Spinal Myoclonus, has almost disappeared. It has taken me almost a year to get to this point. I still have lingering depression, but I think at this point it is mostly due to my isolation, (no friends, no job). But at least now, I am mentally well enough to think about trying to volunteer somewhere and eventually get a job again.

 

The fact is that I was in denial about the severity of my depression for a long time. I've had crying spells and melancholia since I was a teenager. I have been plagued by thoughts of death all my life - fearing the death of my loved ones, and being chronically suicidal.  I have always suffered from "love addiction" and completely fall apart when lovers or close girlfriends leave me. This was my reality BEFORE I ever took an antidepressant.

 

Some people on this website claim that depression is a symptom of abusive childhoods or a side-effect of medication.  My mental problems can definitely be contributed to an emotionally abusive parent. However, no amount of therapy has helped. I have tried so many things over the years. And I started so young. I picked up my first psychology book at age 13 and started learning about mental health!  So sad. All those hours of journaling, self-inquiry, meditation, reading self-help books, talk therapy, trying to alter my beliefs and become more positive thru various spiritual modalities, group therapy, CBT workshops, art therapy, hypnosis, and on and on.... Sure, there were short term benefits, but nothing ever worked in the long run.

 

This doesn't mean that those things aren't worth doing. I still suffer from a flat down mood on some days as well as negative thoughts and low energy.  But I'm not willing to raise my medication dose, and so I must try to use these non-medication therapies to improve my mental state. This is now possible, since I am finally mentally and physically stable due to antidepressant therapy. That is my foundation. You cannot build a house without first laying down a foundation that can support the structures above.  I am ready to start building the rest of my house.

 

I have accepted the fact that I might have to take an antidepressant for the rest of my life. As long as it keeps working without causing me any major side-effects, then I'm ok with that.  

2005-2008: Effexor; 1/2008 Tapered 3 months, then quit. 7/2008-2009 Reinstated Effexor (crying spells at start of new job.)
2009-3/2013: Switched to Pristiq 50 mg then 100 mg
3/2013: Switched to Lexapro 10mg. Cut down to 5 mg. CT for 2 weeks then reinstated for 6 weeks
8/2013-8/2014: Tapering Lexapro (Lots of withdrawal symptoms)
11/2014 -8/2015: Developed severe insomnia and uncontrollable daily crying spells
12/2014-6/2015: Tried Ambien, Klonopin,Ativan, Lunesta, Sonata, Trazadone, Seroquel, Rameron, Gabapentin - Developed Anxiety disorder, PTSD, and Psychogenic Myoclonus
7/2015-1/2016: Reinstated Lexapro 2 mg (mild improvement, but crying spells still present)

1/2016-5/2017: Lexapro 5 mg ( helped a lot, but poor stress tolerance & depressive episodes)

5/20/2017 - Raised dose to Lexapro 10 mg due to lingering depression(Total of 2 failed tapers & severe PAWS)

9/11/2018 - Present: Still on 10 mg Lexapro and mostly recovered.(Extremely sensitive to stress which triggers Myoclonus.)

Intro page: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4149-lilu-depression-worsened-by-meds/

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manymoretodays

As far as the crying spells as related to Lexapro withdrawal.  My own experience is..........at 19 mos. off........and I had gone to 3mg. from 5mg. and then was CTed while in the psych. hospital(not recommending my method by any means) it does get better, somewhat........or is better at this time.  As with all the neuroemotions that get amplified I think the best you can do is limit exposures.......at least those exposures that could be emotional.  Anger, resentments, sorrow, grief, annoyances, etc.

 

And honestly......you can't control all that might cause emotions during this period.  I mean stuff happens that just can't always be avoided or limited.

 

Of course exercise does, without a doubt help........in any form you can handle.  Oh, and not resisting when the crying comes helps me alot now to minimize it......recognize it........even say to whoever I may be with that sheesh, I'll be glad when I don't cry so much anymore.

 

And if I can find a movie once in awhile.......to shed the tears during.........let it all out..........well I think that has helped me too.

 

Sorry.......some of this may have been said above.......I didn't read all the responses due to my neuro focus still being a bit.......not the best..........yet improving.

 

p.s. and for me, just since we are all a little different with this stuff......the Lexapro decreased my propensity to tears.  I have always been a crier........but alas, I now do know the experience of being a down on my knees or the floor wailer, that was never the case in my adulthood, although I peg myself as emotionally about 10-13 years old now.......tis what it tis and it WILL get better!

 

And this to CW5600, I don't recall your age but if it's 50 something like me now........we can turn it around too........our lives........you know, referring to what you said above.  Just have to believe and it will be so..........starting to feel optimistic again.......... :huh:

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016. 

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider. manymoretodays

 

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I've read this link many times this week. What is not standing out to me are any indications of how long the intensity of crying and panic lasts for, for other as well as some strategies that help.

 

I think the intensity and duration of crying spells will be different for everybody. We're all on different medications, dosages, and duration. We all have highly individual body and brain chemistry, which affects every aspect of withdrawal.

 

For me, the crying spells became progressively worse with the tapering of medication. If I went below 2 mg Lexapro I go worse, if I went back up, I got better. After I finished the taper, and developed severe insomnia, I was crying pretty much all day. This wasn't just  the kind of crying where you just tear-up a little on and off. No, this was full-blown uncontrollable inconsolable out-loud sobbing that felt like my soul was being ripped out of my chest. Tragic. Intense. Awful.  My eyes hurt every day and my vision was blurry because I was crying so much.  Then came night time which did not offer any respite from the suffering of the day. The unrelenting insomnia kept me tossing and turning, wide-eyed and panicked. 

 

I tried everything. Nothing helped. I tried every supplement suggested here and many prescription meds. I tried hypnosis, deep breathing, meditation, qigong, guided imagery, cognitive behavioral therapy, group therapy, talk therapy, and more.

 

Attempting to withdraw from psychiatric drugs after being on them for 10 years was a HUGE MISTAKE.  It robbed me of years off my life, my livelihood, money, friends, and worst of all my health. Because of the inordinate amount of crying that I engaged in everyday and the breakdown of my nervous system, I wound up with PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) and a Movement Disorder.  

 

I have since mostly recovered from all of the above. The only way to achieve this recovery was to go back on Lexapro. Aside from not going on antidepressants in the first place, this is the antidepressant I should have been on, not Effexor or Pristiq, which raised my anxiety and were barely effective.

 

As I went back on Lexapro, I used liquid generic Lexapro * to taper UP.  Within 3 weeks there was a marked improvement in my sleep. (I also stopped Klonopin and Ambien cold turkey). My crying spells significantly decreased at 2 mg. And my depression slowly began to lift. At 2.5 mg there was still occasional crying spells, but my sleep was steadily improving.  However it wasn't until I reached 4 mg where I really started to see a difference.  There have been no crying spells at 5 mg. Still I continued to be plagued by trauma memories of all my torturous experiences due to withdrawal.  I wish I had never attempted getting off antidepressants. 

 

Being on Lexapro 5 mg for 5 months now, I do not have crying spells anymore and I'm sleeping 8 to 10 hours per night. My nervous system has recovered and I don't have panic attacks or anxiety for no reason.  I can drink strong coffee again! My movement disorder, Functional Spinal Myoclonus, has almost disappeared. It has taken me almost a year to get to this point. I still have lingering depression, but I think at this point it is mostly due to my isolation, (no friends, no job). But at least now, I am mentally well enough to think about trying to volunteer somewhere and eventually get a job again.

 

The fact is that I was in denial about the severity of my depression for a long time. I've had crying spells and melancholia since I was a teenager. I have been plagued by thoughts of death all my life - fearing the death of my loved ones, and being chronically suicidal.  I have always suffered from "love addiction" and completely fall apart when lovers or close girlfriends leave me. This was my reality BEFORE I ever took an antidepressant.

 

Some people on this website claim that depression is a symptom of abusive childhoods or a side-effect of medication.  My mental problems can definitely be contributed to an emotionally abusive parent. However, no amount of therapy has helped. I have tried so many things over the years. And I started so young. I picked up my first psychology book at age 13 and started learning about mental health!  So sad. All those hours of journaling, self-inquiry, meditation, reading self-help books, talk therapy, trying to alter my beliefs and become more positive thru various spiritual modalities, group therapy, CBT workshops, art therapy, hypnosis, and on and on.... Sure, there were short term benefits, but nothing ever worked in the long run.

 

This doesn't mean that those things aren't worth doing. I still suffer from a flat down mood on some days as well as negative thoughts and low energy.  But I'm not willing to raise my medication dose, and so I must try to use these non-medication therapies to improve my mental state. This is now possible, since I am finally mentally and physically stable due to antidepressant therapy. That is my foundation. You cannot build a house without first laying down a foundation that can support the structures above.  I am ready to start building the rest of my house.

 

I have accepted the fact that I might have to take an antidepressant for the rest of my life. As long as it keeps working without causing me any major side-effects, then I'm ok with that.  

 

Lilu, im noticing we have similar tendencies; 1. having mellancolla from a young age  2. falling apart at the thought of or when someone leaves me.  3.  the crying spells, i can relate; I used to howl so much, that all the neighbours in the block of flats i lived in could hear me.

All unpleasant and I really wish i was not like this because it is really really difficult to live being this way.  However, there is hope always. 

I noticed you were taking a number of medications, that sure does complicate things but hats off for trying everything.  

In 2001 - started on Carbamezapine (can't remember dose), Fluoexitine 20mg, Clanozepam (low dose) after a nervous breakdown.

In 2004 - abruptly stopped carbamezapine after falling pregnant.  

In 2009 - changed from Fluoexitine to Citalopram 20mg.

In 2014 - tappered off clanozepam.

In Aug 2015 - cold turkey off Citalopram :o

From Aug - Dec 2015 I had mostly flu-like symptoms and trouble sleeping. From Jan - April 2016 Emotional nightmare ensued, paranoia, excessive anxiety and tormenting thoughts, basically trying to manage these emotions and thoughts which are exhausting.  Lots of intense emotions followed by tears, at times howling when Im alone.In March 2016 I tried Choline & Inisitol, Vit B Complex, Using Aromatherapy, like Lavendar, Clary Sage and others.

In April STOPPED Choline & Inositol as I beleive it was giving me shakes and making me more anxious.  It also made me feel like i'd taken a benzo tablet making me feel sedated.  Reading - The Body Keeps Score by Bessel Van Der Kolk (recommended by a member on this group).

Symptoms - extreme low self esteem and insecurity, intense emotions and tearfulness. This is so so hard.  But im going to keep pushing.  Feel bad for my 2 girls and husband.  I don't want to be seen in this way, especially by the girls. Self-help : praying, meditating, breathing exercises and physical exercises.

Ceterizine (antihistamine) - I've been taking this for many years now for itchiness in my palms and feet.  I take them as and when I need them. JULY 2016 Dr Bach homeopathic remedies and 'rescue remedy'

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Perhaps the above would be a fitting interim ending post in your thread, Lilu? Notice I said 'interim'. Puts it out there that your situation might change some time in the future.

 

Not everyone is ok with getting off antidepressants, this we all know. But as this is a site for peer support getting off them, your post would be eminently more useful in your thread. It is an excellent summation of your experience and should be kept with your story. I for one think it is valuable for people to see, not lost here in a thread about uncontrollable crying spells, because it is far deeper than that. You relate it to the quality of your life in a compelling way.

 

I sense you have always disliked my posts, that's ok. I've always been your quiet champion. I suffered from crying spells too, they were the reason I always went on the drugs, 4 times worth. I lost 4 jobs because I could not stop crying. But now, off the meds, my life is much different. Not good but I don't need the meds anymore because I don't have the luxury of working, now that my life has been ruined. The social security checks are coming, small as they are and not enough to live on, but they at least provide food and a roof. You are younger, you'll be able to turn your life around. I wish you all the luck in the world getting it done.

Oh that is alot of medication to come off and sorry to hear about you losing your jobs. We need a no side effects cure for crying spells. 

In 2001 - started on Carbamezapine (can't remember dose), Fluoexitine 20mg, Clanozepam (low dose) after a nervous breakdown.

In 2004 - abruptly stopped carbamezapine after falling pregnant.  

In 2009 - changed from Fluoexitine to Citalopram 20mg.

In 2014 - tappered off clanozepam.

In Aug 2015 - cold turkey off Citalopram :o

From Aug - Dec 2015 I had mostly flu-like symptoms and trouble sleeping. From Jan - April 2016 Emotional nightmare ensued, paranoia, excessive anxiety and tormenting thoughts, basically trying to manage these emotions and thoughts which are exhausting.  Lots of intense emotions followed by tears, at times howling when Im alone.In March 2016 I tried Choline & Inisitol, Vit B Complex, Using Aromatherapy, like Lavendar, Clary Sage and others.

In April STOPPED Choline & Inositol as I beleive it was giving me shakes and making me more anxious.  It also made me feel like i'd taken a benzo tablet making me feel sedated.  Reading - The Body Keeps Score by Bessel Van Der Kolk (recommended by a member on this group).

Symptoms - extreme low self esteem and insecurity, intense emotions and tearfulness. This is so so hard.  But im going to keep pushing.  Feel bad for my 2 girls and husband.  I don't want to be seen in this way, especially by the girls. Self-help : praying, meditating, breathing exercises and physical exercises.

Ceterizine (antihistamine) - I've been taking this for many years now for itchiness in my palms and feet.  I take them as and when I need them. JULY 2016 Dr Bach homeopathic remedies and 'rescue remedy'

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manymoretodays

"Oh that is alot of medication to come off and sorry to hear about you losing your jobs. We need a no side effects cure for crying spells."

 

Laughter, music(+/- as it CAN lead to tears as well as peaceful feelings), and exercise(anything goes).  The cure.  :unsure:   Love and understanding as well.  Self hugs.  Naps and baths.  Maybe aromatherapy too.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016. 

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider. manymoretodays

 

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Lilu, im noticing we have similar tendencies; 1. having mellancolla from a young age  2. falling apart at the thought of or when someone leaves me.  3.  the crying spells, i can relate; I used to howl so much, that all the neighbours in the block of flats i lived in could hear me.

 

All unpleasant and I really wish i was not like this because it is really really difficult to live being this way.  However, there is hope always. 

I noticed you were taking a number of medications, that sure does complicate things but hats off for trying everything.  

 

 Yes... but I never cried so much and for so long as when I went off of antidepressants.  Not crying at all now is a welcome relief. 

2005-2008: Effexor; 1/2008 Tapered 3 months, then quit. 7/2008-2009 Reinstated Effexor (crying spells at start of new job.)
2009-3/2013: Switched to Pristiq 50 mg then 100 mg
3/2013: Switched to Lexapro 10mg. Cut down to 5 mg. CT for 2 weeks then reinstated for 6 weeks
8/2013-8/2014: Tapering Lexapro (Lots of withdrawal symptoms)
11/2014 -8/2015: Developed severe insomnia and uncontrollable daily crying spells
12/2014-6/2015: Tried Ambien, Klonopin,Ativan, Lunesta, Sonata, Trazadone, Seroquel, Rameron, Gabapentin - Developed Anxiety disorder, PTSD, and Psychogenic Myoclonus
7/2015-1/2016: Reinstated Lexapro 2 mg (mild improvement, but crying spells still present)

1/2016-5/2017: Lexapro 5 mg ( helped a lot, but poor stress tolerance & depressive episodes)

5/20/2017 - Raised dose to Lexapro 10 mg due to lingering depression(Total of 2 failed tapers & severe PAWS)

9/11/2018 - Present: Still on 10 mg Lexapro and mostly recovered.(Extremely sensitive to stress which triggers Myoclonus.)

Intro page: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4149-lilu-depression-worsened-by-meds/

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cymbaltawithdrawal5600

Quote:

 

"Thanks, Cym, I'll copy and paste what I wrote into my own thread."

 

Good job, I saw it. You know there are researchers and docs who visit the site, right? It is for them too.

 

I went through some pretty bad crying in wd but there was a subtle difference in it I cannot explain. I remember one day it was so bad, couldn't stop, that I just leaned forward and blinked my eyes and the tears just kept squirting out. That was so weird. But it gradually went away and I haven't felt that bad since. Have cried a few times but it was over soon.

 

Good luck sweetie and take care of yourself, ok? Keep in touch, don't think you can't. We still want to know how you are getting on.

What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878

 

July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site.

 

Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey.

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There are so many types of crying in wd crying could have subtitles... 

 

crying in rage 

crying like my eyes are leaking and I feel nothing

crying is sadness

crying in regret

crying is despair..

crying in anger

crying in relief 

crying cause I finally can.... 

 

Crying is for sure a big part of wd in many different ways... I read about tears at one point long ago and learned there is a chemical reason for it... 

 

http://www.sciencealert.com/watch-why-do-we-cry-the-chemistry-of-three-types-of-tears

 

pain killers in tears calm us down... that is a good thing...

 

Emotional tears kick in during times where you feel a loss of control, and scientists think that, along with other physical reactions such as an increased heart rate and slower breathing, our stress hormone- and endorphin-laden tears are there to quickly stabilise your mood, and perhaps act as a very obvious signal to those around us that we may be in need of some cuddles.

WARNING THIS WILL BE LONG
Had a car accident in 85
Codeine was the pain med when I was release from hosp continuous use till 89
Given PROZAC by a specialist to help with nerve pain in my leg 89-90 not sure which year
Was not told a thing about it being a psych med thought it was a pain killer no info about psych side effects I went nuts had hallucinations. As I had a head injury and was diagnosed with a concussion in 85 I was sent to a head injury clinic in 1990 five years after the accident. I don't think they knew I had been on prozac I did not think it a big deal and never did finish the bottle of pills. I had tests of course lots of them. Was put into a pain clinic and given amitriptyline which stopped the withdrawal but had many side effects. But I could sleep something I had not done in a very long time the pain lessened. My mother got cancer in 94 they switched my meds to Zoloft to help deal with this pressure as I was her main care giver she died in 96. I stopped zoloft in 96 had withdrawal was put on paxil went nutty quit it ct put on resperidol quit it ct had withdrawal was put on Effexor... 2years later celexa was added 20mg then increased to 40mg huge personality change went wild. Did too fast taper off Celexa 05 as I felt unwell for a long time prior... quit Effexor 150mg ct 07 found ****** 8 months into withdrawal learned some things was banned from there in 08 have kept learning since. there is really not enough room here to put my history but I have a lot of opinions about a lot of things especially any of the drugs mentioned above.
One thing I would like to add here is this tidbit ALL OPIATES INCREASE SEROTONIN it is not a huge jump to being in chronic pain to being put on an ssri/snri and opiates will affect your antidepressants and your thinking.

As I do not update much I will put my quit date Nov. 17 2007 I quit Effexor cold turkey. 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1096-introducing-myself-btdt/

There is a crack in everything ..That's how the light gets in :)

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http://www.lifebuzz.com/tears/

 The tears that come about from hard laughter aren’t even close to the tears of sorrow. Like a drop of ocean water each tiny tear drop carries a microcosm of human experience. Her project is called The Topography of Tears.

 

Emotional tears have protein-based hormones including the neurotransmitter leucine enkephalin, which is a natural painkiller that is released when we are stressed. Plus, the tears seen under the microscope are crystallized salt and can lead to different shapes and forms. So even psychic tears with the same chemical composition can look very different. Fisher said, “There are so many variables—there’s the chemistry, the viscosity, the setting, the evaporation rate and the settings of the microscope.”

 

Like snow flakes and fingerprints, no tears are alike. I can't believe the difference between all of these. If you found this post interesting, share it with others.

Source: Rose-Lynn Fisher

 

Some times we have to trust that our bodies know what they are doing often better then we do and it is healing the best way it knows how with whatever tools it has.  

 

I wish you peace

WARNING THIS WILL BE LONG
Had a car accident in 85
Codeine was the pain med when I was release from hosp continuous use till 89
Given PROZAC by a specialist to help with nerve pain in my leg 89-90 not sure which year
Was not told a thing about it being a psych med thought it was a pain killer no info about psych side effects I went nuts had hallucinations. As I had a head injury and was diagnosed with a concussion in 85 I was sent to a head injury clinic in 1990 five years after the accident. I don't think they knew I had been on prozac I did not think it a big deal and never did finish the bottle of pills. I had tests of course lots of them. Was put into a pain clinic and given amitriptyline which stopped the withdrawal but had many side effects. But I could sleep something I had not done in a very long time the pain lessened. My mother got cancer in 94 they switched my meds to Zoloft to help deal with this pressure as I was her main care giver she died in 96. I stopped zoloft in 96 had withdrawal was put on paxil went nutty quit it ct put on resperidol quit it ct had withdrawal was put on Effexor... 2years later celexa was added 20mg then increased to 40mg huge personality change went wild. Did too fast taper off Celexa 05 as I felt unwell for a long time prior... quit Effexor 150mg ct 07 found ****** 8 months into withdrawal learned some things was banned from there in 08 have kept learning since. there is really not enough room here to put my history but I have a lot of opinions about a lot of things especially any of the drugs mentioned above.
One thing I would like to add here is this tidbit ALL OPIATES INCREASE SEROTONIN it is not a huge jump to being in chronic pain to being put on an ssri/snri and opiates will affect your antidepressants and your thinking.

As I do not update much I will put my quit date Nov. 17 2007 I quit Effexor cold turkey. 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1096-introducing-myself-btdt/

There is a crack in everything ..That's how the light gets in :)

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wiki


The third category, in general, referred to as crying or weeping, is increased tearing due to strongemotional stress, pleasure, angersufferingmourning, or physical pain. This practice is not restricted to negative emotions; many people cry when extremely happy such as during times of intense humour and laughter. In humans, emotional tears can be accompanied by reddening of the face and sobbing — cough-like, convulsive breathing, sometimes involving spasms of the whole upper body. Tears brought about by emotions have a different chemical make-up than those for lubrication; emotional tears contain more of the protein-based hormones prolactinadrenocorticotropic hormone, and Leu-enkephalin (a natural painkiller) than basal or reflex tears. The limbic system is involved in production of basic emotional drives, such as anger, fear, etc. The limbic system, to be specific, the hypothalamus, also has a degree of control over the autonomic system. The parasympatheticbranch of the autonomic nervous system controls the lacrimal glands via the neurotransmitteracetylcholine through both the nicotinic and muscarinic receptors. When these receptors are activated, the lacrimal gland is stimulated to produce tears.[6]


 


Familial dysautonomia is a genetic condition that can be associated with a lack of overflow tears (alacrima) during emotional crying.[10]


 


gee we gotta love science :)


peace


 


Also, emotional tears are made up of a different chemical component than those evoked by eye irritants and can relay chemical messages to others.[16] The change in sex drive could be attributed to a drop in testosterone provoked by the tear chemicals, reducing aggression. In the animal world, it has been found that some blind mole rats rub tears all over their bodies as a strategy to keep aggressive mole rats away.[17]


Tear composition varies from tear types. Mainly, tears are composed of water, salts, antibodies and lysozymes (antibacterial enzymes). According to a discovery by Dr. William H. Frey II, a bio-chemist from St. Paul Ramsey medical center in Minnesota, the composition of tears caused by emotion differs from that of tears as a reaction to irritations, such as onion fumes, dust or allergy. Emotional tears are composed of more protein-based hormones, such as prolactinadrenocorticotropic, and leucine enkephalin (a natural pain killer), which is suggested to be the mechanism behind the experience of crying from emotion making an individual feel better.[18]


WARNING THIS WILL BE LONG
Had a car accident in 85
Codeine was the pain med when I was release from hosp continuous use till 89
Given PROZAC by a specialist to help with nerve pain in my leg 89-90 not sure which year
Was not told a thing about it being a psych med thought it was a pain killer no info about psych side effects I went nuts had hallucinations. As I had a head injury and was diagnosed with a concussion in 85 I was sent to a head injury clinic in 1990 five years after the accident. I don't think they knew I had been on prozac I did not think it a big deal and never did finish the bottle of pills. I had tests of course lots of them. Was put into a pain clinic and given amitriptyline which stopped the withdrawal but had many side effects. But I could sleep something I had not done in a very long time the pain lessened. My mother got cancer in 94 they switched my meds to Zoloft to help deal with this pressure as I was her main care giver she died in 96. I stopped zoloft in 96 had withdrawal was put on paxil went nutty quit it ct put on resperidol quit it ct had withdrawal was put on Effexor... 2years later celexa was added 20mg then increased to 40mg huge personality change went wild. Did too fast taper off Celexa 05 as I felt unwell for a long time prior... quit Effexor 150mg ct 07 found ****** 8 months into withdrawal learned some things was banned from there in 08 have kept learning since. there is really not enough room here to put my history but I have a lot of opinions about a lot of things especially any of the drugs mentioned above.
One thing I would like to add here is this tidbit ALL OPIATES INCREASE SEROTONIN it is not a huge jump to being in chronic pain to being put on an ssri/snri and opiates will affect your antidepressants and your thinking.

As I do not update much I will put my quit date Nov. 17 2007 I quit Effexor cold turkey. 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1096-introducing-myself-btdt/

There is a crack in everything ..That's how the light gets in :)

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Quote: By btdt

 

 

wiki

Tears brought about by emotions have a different chemical make-up than those for lubrication; emotional tears contain more of the protein-based hormones prolactinadrenocorticotropic hormone, and Leu-enkephalin (a natural painkiller) than basal or reflex tears. The limbic system is involved in production of basic emotional drives, such as anger, fear, etc. The limbic system, to be specific, the hypothalamus, also has a degree of control over the autonomic system. The parasympatheticbranch of the autonomic nervous system controls the lacrimal glands via the neurotransmitteracetylcholine through both the nicotinic and muscarinic receptors. When these receptors are activated, the lacrimal gland is stimulated to produce tears.[6]

 

Hi btdt, a really interesting article.  I wonder why in the case of crying spells, if you have the same thought now - it doesn't appear to bother you.  If you then have the same thought an hour later, it triggers the crying spell.  It puzzles me because you believe you have gotten over a trigger, only for it to rear an hour later. Is it about perception, hormones, brain chemicals or..

In 2001 - started on Carbamezapine (can't remember dose), Fluoexitine 20mg, Clanozepam (low dose) after a nervous breakdown.

In 2004 - abruptly stopped carbamezapine after falling pregnant.  

In 2009 - changed from Fluoexitine to Citalopram 20mg.

In 2014 - tappered off clanozepam.

In Aug 2015 - cold turkey off Citalopram :o

From Aug - Dec 2015 I had mostly flu-like symptoms and trouble sleeping. From Jan - April 2016 Emotional nightmare ensued, paranoia, excessive anxiety and tormenting thoughts, basically trying to manage these emotions and thoughts which are exhausting.  Lots of intense emotions followed by tears, at times howling when Im alone.In March 2016 I tried Choline & Inisitol, Vit B Complex, Using Aromatherapy, like Lavendar, Clary Sage and others.

In April STOPPED Choline & Inositol as I beleive it was giving me shakes and making me more anxious.  It also made me feel like i'd taken a benzo tablet making me feel sedated.  Reading - The Body Keeps Score by Bessel Van Der Kolk (recommended by a member on this group).

Symptoms - extreme low self esteem and insecurity, intense emotions and tearfulness. This is so so hard.  But im going to keep pushing.  Feel bad for my 2 girls and husband.  I don't want to be seen in this way, especially by the girls. Self-help : praying, meditating, breathing exercises and physical exercises.

Ceterizine (antihistamine) - I've been taking this for many years now for itchiness in my palms and feet.  I take them as and when I need them. JULY 2016 Dr Bach homeopathic remedies and 'rescue remedy'

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  • Altostrata changed the title to Deep emotional pain and crying spells, spontaneous weeping

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