Administrator Altostrata Posted June 17, 2013 Administrator Share Posted June 17, 2013 Correct, if you have a bad reaction to kefir, stay away from it for a while. Personally, kefir has been one of my dietary mainstays on and off for a long while. Currently, I'm drinking it for the protein, etc. With any food, other's mileage may vary. This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner. "It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein All postings © copyrighted. Link to comment
Christiana Posted June 27, 2013 Author Share Posted June 27, 2013 It's so odd how I have drank it before during withdrawal and not had any problems, but now it's really got me in a big mess. I'm feeling a bit better, but my symptoms are still really ramped up. <sigh> Thanks Rhi and Alto for your support! I agree, it's off of my list of things to consume, for now. I'll take a look at GiaK's info. Thanks for letting me know! Jun-Jul '09 (approx 7 wks) - 5mg/day Lexapro (drug rep samples) given by family dr for long, unended, very stressful divorce Each dose taken makes sicker, think it's just body adjusting, have no clue it's severe adverse reaction at time Aug '09 - pharmacy gets dr rx for, insurance won't pay, I can't afford, dr changes to Celexa, decline to take, cold turkey, necessary blessing in disguise, in hindsight at least Gradually feel some better over 1-2 wks, 3rd wk horrific withdrawal symptoms start & build, see doctor & start researching internet about what's happening, figure it out, 60-70+ severe, frightening, & debilitating symptoms emerge, realize nothing can do to feel better easily or quickly, feel like & think I'm dying, reach point where doctor gets home healthcare & have to call friend to stay with & take care of, friend abandons about 1 yr & lose home healthcare 1st yr symptoms extremely severe, 2nd yr just somewhat better, now into 3rd yr symptoms don't seem much better, still causing horrible suffering, wax & wane in severity, sometimes almost as severe as when started, practically homebound, mostly bedbound, very hard completing simple tasks, symptoms definitely much worse 7-10 days/mo around menstrual cycle Have lost vehicle & home, plus loved cat & dog had for long time, was homeless several months last winter, lived out of car, living in undesirable gov't subsidized housing now causing many troubles, have no medical & very little rx insurance, disability check & food stamps aren't enough to provide basic needs, lack any reliable personal support anymore, very isolated & all alone, have many pressing stressful things must be done, can barely or unable to complete without help don't have, even ones to help situation some, don't even have finances to get urgent necessary needed help required to help situation & self, social services is frequently visiting now, fear being polydrugged, losing everything, put into nursing home, hope & pray someone will help to keep from happening, don't know what else to do, still way to sick to return to work & college, believe I will recover, in the meantime tho have no answers except to plead for help, hope & pray someone, anyone, who truly cares does soon In 32nd mo now still very bad SSRI protracted withdrawal, have only seen few signs of healing since 2nd yr passed, somehow manage to keep fighting, afraid time is running out for best tho & situation only going to get worse trying to survive on own if don't get help from someone This pretty much summarizes what 49 little round white pills (if I recall correctly) have done to my life & future for now, my before & after life are drastically opposite now, both my situation & self, if only I'd known their potential, a little bit too late now tho huh?.?.?...hindsight really is 20/20 isn't it?.?.?... I pray God blesses and helps each and every one of us, here and elsewhere, going through this nightmare. Amen, amen, amen. Link to comment
Christiana Posted June 30, 2013 Author Share Posted June 30, 2013 The beginning of July, I'll be entering my 5th year of a cold turkey withdrawal, from taking 5mg/day of Lexapro for just 7 weeks. It's obvious now it was a very neurotoxic drug to me, thus why each pill I took only served to make me sicker and sicker, forcing me to have to cold turkey it, yet not knowing, at the time, I would end up in very bad protracted withdrawal for years now. For those of you that have been in protracted withdrawal a long time, especially if you've had an adverse reaction and have been in it just as long or longer than I have, do you have any helpful advice you can please give me? Obviously, I'm still here fighting, but it's still so hard. I really need to hear from others who are in the same situation as I am. I desperately need to strengthen my hope and resolve that someday I will feel much better and it will all just be a bad memory. How far out are you now and what are your symptoms like? What have you done or are you doing now that helps/hasn't helped? For the ladies - do you still experience a horrible relapse with your period? What helps or doesn't help, if anything? I still struggle very bad for 7-10 days a month with my period. Most of my original symptoms come back bad. Once it's over, I return to my baseline of still feeling quite awful. I had thought that after 4 years I would be able to say I'm feeling better than this, but unfortunately, I'm not. It's still so bad that I spend a lot of time at home in bed. Here lately, although I don't know why, all I seem to want to do is sleep and when awake, just lay in bed and watch tv. It's like I'm still just so disconnected from so many things. Still, any kind of stress will cause me a huge relapse, which causes an increase in my symptoms. I also have food intolerances, as well as supplement and medication. As well, I still have racing thoughts, fear, doom, gloom, anxiety, depersonalization, derealization, tenseness, agitation, restlessness, pounding heartbeat, nausea, fatigue, lack of appetite, insomnia, muscle weakness, tightness in my chest, lump in my throat, itching, brain zaps, headaches, ringing in my ears, depression, crying spells, sensitivities to sound, light, noise, movement, etc., which all wax and wane in severity. The symptoms I have that bother me the most are apathy/anhedonia/lack of motivation, lack of appetite, very little desire to care for myself or anything like I used to, which seems like a major burden and undertaking to do something, if and when I manage to get anything done, and horrid PMS or whatever you prefer to call it. I think I read somewhere these symptoms, especially the first, are the last to go. Is this true? Do you know of anything I can do to help myself with any of them? Sometimes my symptoms are light. Other times they're so heavy. I don't really have any big windows per say. My symptoms just wax and wane from better to worse. Whereas some have left, only to come back later, at times, others have stayed with me, but just lightened up a little bit. I have so many symptoms I just can't remember all of them, but to the best of my knowledge, I've mentioned the most bothersome ones I have at this time. I have lost all of my friends. My mom is the only one I can depend on to, at least, go get me the things I need. Essentially, I have no emotional support. My mom has gotten tired of me telling her how bad I feel and I believe my doctor has too. I'm so isolated and have no one to talk to it's painful. I'm considering going to see a psychologist, not a psychiatrist, just to have someone to lean on and help see me through the rest of this. I hate to think it may take me many more years to recover. I just don't have the ability to see the end of all of this. I tend to ruminate a lot over how I'm going to make it down the long road that it looks like lies ahead of me. The neuro-emotions, especially the fear, worry, doom, gloom, etc. do get the best of me, at times, but I, somehow, always manage to pull myself out. I keep telling myself I've made it this far, so I can make it the rest of the way. Like most, if not all, here I just wish I knew when it was all going to end. I also wish I knew how to make things a little more comfortable for myself, during this time. Please share your thoughts with me. I really need to know how you're progressing, especially with whatever symptoms you have, and what you're doing to bide your time to try to make things easier on yourself, especially your symptoms. Please, if you don't mind, tell me about your medication history, how far into withdrawal you are, what your symptoms are now, how the symptoms you have now are in comparison to when they first began, how any improvements in any of your symptoms have happened, what you've found to help with your certain symptoms, if anything, etc. I hope this finds each and every one of you on an as easy and short-lived journey, as possible, toward a state of complete wellness. Thank you very much. Jun-Jul '09 (approx 7 wks) - 5mg/day Lexapro (drug rep samples) given by family dr for long, unended, very stressful divorce Each dose taken makes sicker, think it's just body adjusting, have no clue it's severe adverse reaction at time Aug '09 - pharmacy gets dr rx for, insurance won't pay, I can't afford, dr changes to Celexa, decline to take, cold turkey, necessary blessing in disguise, in hindsight at least Gradually feel some better over 1-2 wks, 3rd wk horrific withdrawal symptoms start & build, see doctor & start researching internet about what's happening, figure it out, 60-70+ severe, frightening, & debilitating symptoms emerge, realize nothing can do to feel better easily or quickly, feel like & think I'm dying, reach point where doctor gets home healthcare & have to call friend to stay with & take care of, friend abandons about 1 yr & lose home healthcare 1st yr symptoms extremely severe, 2nd yr just somewhat better, now into 3rd yr symptoms don't seem much better, still causing horrible suffering, wax & wane in severity, sometimes almost as severe as when started, practically homebound, mostly bedbound, very hard completing simple tasks, symptoms definitely much worse 7-10 days/mo around menstrual cycle Have lost vehicle & home, plus loved cat & dog had for long time, was homeless several months last winter, lived out of car, living in undesirable gov't subsidized housing now causing many troubles, have no medical & very little rx insurance, disability check & food stamps aren't enough to provide basic needs, lack any reliable personal support anymore, very isolated & all alone, have many pressing stressful things must be done, can barely or unable to complete without help don't have, even ones to help situation some, don't even have finances to get urgent necessary needed help required to help situation & self, social services is frequently visiting now, fear being polydrugged, losing everything, put into nursing home, hope & pray someone will help to keep from happening, don't know what else to do, still way to sick to return to work & college, believe I will recover, in the meantime tho have no answers except to plead for help, hope & pray someone, anyone, who truly cares does soon In 32nd mo now still very bad SSRI protracted withdrawal, have only seen few signs of healing since 2nd yr passed, somehow manage to keep fighting, afraid time is running out for best tho & situation only going to get worse trying to survive on own if don't get help from someone This pretty much summarizes what 49 little round white pills (if I recall correctly) have done to my life & future for now, my before & after life are drastically opposite now, both my situation & self, if only I'd known their potential, a little bit too late now tho huh?.?.?...hindsight really is 20/20 isn't it?.?.?... I pray God blesses and helps each and every one of us, here and elsewhere, going through this nightmare. Amen, amen, amen. Link to comment
Edted Posted June 30, 2013 Share Posted June 30, 2013 Christiana: I am so sorry to hear of your suffering. I do not know much about Lexapro, but I anticipate that those who do will respond soon. I imagine they will want to know if you are taking any other medications (not just psychotropics) or supplements. Sincerely, Ed Link to comment
miriza Posted June 30, 2013 Share Posted June 30, 2013 My advice would be to taper off benzos if you're still on them...they may be delaying your healing.... *Poly-drugged since May 2011 (14 meds in 4 months-paradox. reactions to all). From mild anxiety to almost psychosis on meds. IT IS THE MEDS, NOT ME! *Elavil: 75 mg -> 56 (3d) 56 -> 37.5 (3d) 37.5 -> 18 (3d) 37.5 (3d) Imipramine: 37.5 mg (1 wk) 37.5 mg -> 0 (1 mo,10/08/11): akathisia! 5 mg -> 0 (1 mo,11/29/11) Now in w/d hell and missing my old self. Please go to http://www.askapatient.com and leave a review of your med(s) and w/d experience. This site opened my eyes and saved me. Link to comment
Iggy131313 Posted June 30, 2013 Share Posted June 30, 2013 I know we havespoken about this before, but I feel that your lyme, and verious other health issues especially as they relate to the nervous system are making things more difficult for you, the healing may be slower but Im sure as you HAVE seen iimprovement over the years that this should continue. I wish there was some good advice I could give you, or a magic wand. Im so sorry you are suffering so much, its not fair Miriza makes a good point about the benzos, not that they may be delaying your healing, there is no reason why you shouldnt heal with them in your system, but how long have you been at your current dose? is it 40mg valium? You could have tolerance withdrawal ontop of things? damaged by citalopram - severe suffering for 3 years now...no improvement akathsiia, pgad, dp/dr, terror, and so SO many more daily severly disabled and lost everything Link to comment
Lilu Posted June 30, 2013 Share Posted June 30, 2013 Hi Christiana, What were you feeling like BEFORE you started Lexapro? Also it is not clear to me, are you taking any medications now? I see in the thread that you were on Benzos? When and for how long? It's just mind boggling to me that you could have all those symptoms after 5 years of quitting Lexapro. I hope that doesn't happen to me. I recently tried quitting it cold turkey after taking it 2 months, and I had the symptoms you are describing. Still, if I felt as bad as you do, for as long, I would probably try another medication, just so I could function. And maybe it would be a good idea to take birth control pills to relieve your pain around your period. Have you had exams and/or blood tests to rule out other deficiencies? If you have medicaid, they will cover all this. Also, in terms of support, you should look into your local University/Hospital behavioral services. I don't know about where you are, but these services are usually eligible to people on social services and medicaid. I use my local University Behavioral Health Care division and get free therapy, group therapy, and psychiatry services. It took me a long time to find them and get in, but I persevered, even though it was really tough to keep calling and being persistent. 2005-2008: Effexor; 1/2008 Tapered 3 months, then quit. 7/2008-2009 Reinstated Effexor (crying spells at start of new job.) 2009-3/2013: Switched to Pristiq 50 mg then 100 mg 3/2013: Switched to Lexapro 10mg. Cut down to 5 mg. CT for 2 weeks then reinstated for 6 weeks 8/2013-8/2014: Tapering Lexapro (Lots of withdrawal symptoms) 11/2014 -8/2015: Developed severe insomnia and uncontrollable daily crying spells 12/2014-6/2015: Tried Ambien, Klonopin, Ativan, Lunesta, Sonata, Trazadone, Seroquel, Rameron, Gabapentin - Developed Anxiety disorder, PTSD, and Psychogenic Myoclonus 7/2015-1/2016: Reinstated Lexapro 2 mg (mild improvement, but crying spells still present) 1/2016-5/2017: Lexapro 5 mg ( helped a lot, but poor stress tolerance & depressive episodes) 5/20/2017 - Raised dose to Lexapro 10 mg due to lingering depression(Total of 2 failed tapers & severe PAWS) 9/11/2018 - Present: Still on 10 mg Lexapro and mostly recovered.(Anxiety still triggers Myoclonus.) 10/7/2022 - 20 mg Lexapro (brand only) Plus occasional Klonopin for anxiety and Ambien for insomnia. Link to comment
Lilu Posted June 30, 2013 Share Posted June 30, 2013 I just read an article that talks about antidepressants being fat-soluble, which means that they may be stored in your tissues for many years and continue to release on their own. If that is the case with you, then maybe a long juice cleanse can help your body heal itself. Clean out your liver and other organs, etc. Kind of like what Joe Cross did in his documentary, "Sick, Fat, and nearly dead". 2005-2008: Effexor; 1/2008 Tapered 3 months, then quit. 7/2008-2009 Reinstated Effexor (crying spells at start of new job.) 2009-3/2013: Switched to Pristiq 50 mg then 100 mg 3/2013: Switched to Lexapro 10mg. Cut down to 5 mg. CT for 2 weeks then reinstated for 6 weeks 8/2013-8/2014: Tapering Lexapro (Lots of withdrawal symptoms) 11/2014 -8/2015: Developed severe insomnia and uncontrollable daily crying spells 12/2014-6/2015: Tried Ambien, Klonopin, Ativan, Lunesta, Sonata, Trazadone, Seroquel, Rameron, Gabapentin - Developed Anxiety disorder, PTSD, and Psychogenic Myoclonus 7/2015-1/2016: Reinstated Lexapro 2 mg (mild improvement, but crying spells still present) 1/2016-5/2017: Lexapro 5 mg ( helped a lot, but poor stress tolerance & depressive episodes) 5/20/2017 - Raised dose to Lexapro 10 mg due to lingering depression(Total of 2 failed tapers & severe PAWS) 9/11/2018 - Present: Still on 10 mg Lexapro and mostly recovered.(Anxiety still triggers Myoclonus.) 10/7/2022 - 20 mg Lexapro (brand only) Plus occasional Klonopin for anxiety and Ambien for insomnia. Link to comment
Christiana Posted July 1, 2013 Author Share Posted July 1, 2013 Christiana:I am so sorry to hear of your suffering. I do not know much about Lexapro, but I anticipate that those who do will respond soon. I imagine they will want to know if you are taking any other medications (not just psychotropics) or supplements.Sincerely,Ed Thank you very much, Ed. I'm not taking any supplements, except I do drink 1-2 ensure a day, to try to make up for what I'm lacking in nutrients, from not having much of an appetite and eating much. The only medications I take, which I was taking before withdrawal and not having any problems with are: 20mg/day hydrocortisone for hypoadrenalism 60mg/day armour thyroid for hypothyroidism 40mg/day diazepam for seizures 10/325 mg hydrocodone/day - I can take 2 every 5 hrs., as needed (a max of 10/day), so my dose isn't consistent - on average, some days I only take 6, whereas other days I take 10 Sometimes, I'll take either 4mg or 8mg of ondansetron for nausea, but not on a daily/consistent basis I've taken numerous supplements and medications, besides the aforementioned ones, but they all just make my symptoms worse. I realize withdrawal can cause sensitivities to such substances for quite some time, thus I've quit trying to take anything else, for now. Jun-Jul '09 (approx 7 wks) - 5mg/day Lexapro (drug rep samples) given by family dr for long, unended, very stressful divorce Each dose taken makes sicker, think it's just body adjusting, have no clue it's severe adverse reaction at time Aug '09 - pharmacy gets dr rx for, insurance won't pay, I can't afford, dr changes to Celexa, decline to take, cold turkey, necessary blessing in disguise, in hindsight at least Gradually feel some better over 1-2 wks, 3rd wk horrific withdrawal symptoms start & build, see doctor & start researching internet about what's happening, figure it out, 60-70+ severe, frightening, & debilitating symptoms emerge, realize nothing can do to feel better easily or quickly, feel like & think I'm dying, reach point where doctor gets home healthcare & have to call friend to stay with & take care of, friend abandons about 1 yr & lose home healthcare 1st yr symptoms extremely severe, 2nd yr just somewhat better, now into 3rd yr symptoms don't seem much better, still causing horrible suffering, wax & wane in severity, sometimes almost as severe as when started, practically homebound, mostly bedbound, very hard completing simple tasks, symptoms definitely much worse 7-10 days/mo around menstrual cycle Have lost vehicle & home, plus loved cat & dog had for long time, was homeless several months last winter, lived out of car, living in undesirable gov't subsidized housing now causing many troubles, have no medical & very little rx insurance, disability check & food stamps aren't enough to provide basic needs, lack any reliable personal support anymore, very isolated & all alone, have many pressing stressful things must be done, can barely or unable to complete without help don't have, even ones to help situation some, don't even have finances to get urgent necessary needed help required to help situation & self, social services is frequently visiting now, fear being polydrugged, losing everything, put into nursing home, hope & pray someone will help to keep from happening, don't know what else to do, still way to sick to return to work & college, believe I will recover, in the meantime tho have no answers except to plead for help, hope & pray someone, anyone, who truly cares does soon In 32nd mo now still very bad SSRI protracted withdrawal, have only seen few signs of healing since 2nd yr passed, somehow manage to keep fighting, afraid time is running out for best tho & situation only going to get worse trying to survive on own if don't get help from someone This pretty much summarizes what 49 little round white pills (if I recall correctly) have done to my life & future for now, my before & after life are drastically opposite now, both my situation & self, if only I'd known their potential, a little bit too late now tho huh?.?.?...hindsight really is 20/20 isn't it?.?.?... I pray God blesses and helps each and every one of us, here and elsewhere, going through this nightmare. Amen, amen, amen. Link to comment
Christiana Posted July 1, 2013 Author Share Posted July 1, 2013 My advice would be to taper off benzos if you're still on them...they may be delaying your healing.... I take 40mg/day of diazepam for seizures. I've been doing so, since before I started withdrawal. Given the way I feel, at this time, I don't know how I could possibly handle a withdrawal from another medication. Besides that, since I take it for seizures, I'm not so sure if it's possible or even a good idea. My doctor and I have spoke about me doing so, several times, but not knowing what the outcome would be has kept us from doing so. Please explain to me why you think taking it could be delaying my healing? Jun-Jul '09 (approx 7 wks) - 5mg/day Lexapro (drug rep samples) given by family dr for long, unended, very stressful divorce Each dose taken makes sicker, think it's just body adjusting, have no clue it's severe adverse reaction at time Aug '09 - pharmacy gets dr rx for, insurance won't pay, I can't afford, dr changes to Celexa, decline to take, cold turkey, necessary blessing in disguise, in hindsight at least Gradually feel some better over 1-2 wks, 3rd wk horrific withdrawal symptoms start & build, see doctor & start researching internet about what's happening, figure it out, 60-70+ severe, frightening, & debilitating symptoms emerge, realize nothing can do to feel better easily or quickly, feel like & think I'm dying, reach point where doctor gets home healthcare & have to call friend to stay with & take care of, friend abandons about 1 yr & lose home healthcare 1st yr symptoms extremely severe, 2nd yr just somewhat better, now into 3rd yr symptoms don't seem much better, still causing horrible suffering, wax & wane in severity, sometimes almost as severe as when started, practically homebound, mostly bedbound, very hard completing simple tasks, symptoms definitely much worse 7-10 days/mo around menstrual cycle Have lost vehicle & home, plus loved cat & dog had for long time, was homeless several months last winter, lived out of car, living in undesirable gov't subsidized housing now causing many troubles, have no medical & very little rx insurance, disability check & food stamps aren't enough to provide basic needs, lack any reliable personal support anymore, very isolated & all alone, have many pressing stressful things must be done, can barely or unable to complete without help don't have, even ones to help situation some, don't even have finances to get urgent necessary needed help required to help situation & self, social services is frequently visiting now, fear being polydrugged, losing everything, put into nursing home, hope & pray someone will help to keep from happening, don't know what else to do, still way to sick to return to work & college, believe I will recover, in the meantime tho have no answers except to plead for help, hope & pray someone, anyone, who truly cares does soon In 32nd mo now still very bad SSRI protracted withdrawal, have only seen few signs of healing since 2nd yr passed, somehow manage to keep fighting, afraid time is running out for best tho & situation only going to get worse trying to survive on own if don't get help from someone This pretty much summarizes what 49 little round white pills (if I recall correctly) have done to my life & future for now, my before & after life are drastically opposite now, both my situation & self, if only I'd known their potential, a little bit too late now tho huh?.?.?...hindsight really is 20/20 isn't it?.?.?... I pray God blesses and helps each and every one of us, here and elsewhere, going through this nightmare. Amen, amen, amen. Link to comment
Christiana Posted July 1, 2013 Author Share Posted July 1, 2013 I know we havespoken about this before, but I feel that your lyme, and verious other health issues especially as they relate to the nervous system are making things more difficult for you, the healing may be slower but Im sure as you HAVE seen iimprovement over the years that this should continue. I wish there was some good advice I could give you, or a magic wand. Im so sorry you are suffering so much, its not fair Miriza makes a good point about the benzos, not that they may be delaying your healing, there is no reason why you shouldnt heal with them in your system, but how long have you been at your current dose? is it 40mg valium? You could have tolerance withdrawal ontop of things? I agree, having lyme is certainly not in my favor, as far as healing is concerned. Yes, I have seen improvement, but at a very slow pace and have no reason to believe I won't heal. It's just, after 4 years of withdrawal, I thought I'd be less symptomatic than I am now. Thank you for the well wishes, Iggy. I wish you the same. Please read my reply to Miriza. I've been at my current dose, without any noticeable problems, since August 2006. What exactly does tolerance withdrawal make you feel like - what are the symptoms? How does it happen in the first place? Please explain, because I really don't know much about it, but am willing to consider it. Since diazepam is a long-acting benzo, I don't see how I could have it, but like I said, I really don't understand the manifestations of it. Jun-Jul '09 (approx 7 wks) - 5mg/day Lexapro (drug rep samples) given by family dr for long, unended, very stressful divorce Each dose taken makes sicker, think it's just body adjusting, have no clue it's severe adverse reaction at time Aug '09 - pharmacy gets dr rx for, insurance won't pay, I can't afford, dr changes to Celexa, decline to take, cold turkey, necessary blessing in disguise, in hindsight at least Gradually feel some better over 1-2 wks, 3rd wk horrific withdrawal symptoms start & build, see doctor & start researching internet about what's happening, figure it out, 60-70+ severe, frightening, & debilitating symptoms emerge, realize nothing can do to feel better easily or quickly, feel like & think I'm dying, reach point where doctor gets home healthcare & have to call friend to stay with & take care of, friend abandons about 1 yr & lose home healthcare 1st yr symptoms extremely severe, 2nd yr just somewhat better, now into 3rd yr symptoms don't seem much better, still causing horrible suffering, wax & wane in severity, sometimes almost as severe as when started, practically homebound, mostly bedbound, very hard completing simple tasks, symptoms definitely much worse 7-10 days/mo around menstrual cycle Have lost vehicle & home, plus loved cat & dog had for long time, was homeless several months last winter, lived out of car, living in undesirable gov't subsidized housing now causing many troubles, have no medical & very little rx insurance, disability check & food stamps aren't enough to provide basic needs, lack any reliable personal support anymore, very isolated & all alone, have many pressing stressful things must be done, can barely or unable to complete without help don't have, even ones to help situation some, don't even have finances to get urgent necessary needed help required to help situation & self, social services is frequently visiting now, fear being polydrugged, losing everything, put into nursing home, hope & pray someone will help to keep from happening, don't know what else to do, still way to sick to return to work & college, believe I will recover, in the meantime tho have no answers except to plead for help, hope & pray someone, anyone, who truly cares does soon In 32nd mo now still very bad SSRI protracted withdrawal, have only seen few signs of healing since 2nd yr passed, somehow manage to keep fighting, afraid time is running out for best tho & situation only going to get worse trying to survive on own if don't get help from someone This pretty much summarizes what 49 little round white pills (if I recall correctly) have done to my life & future for now, my before & after life are drastically opposite now, both my situation & self, if only I'd known their potential, a little bit too late now tho huh?.?.?...hindsight really is 20/20 isn't it?.?.?... I pray God blesses and helps each and every one of us, here and elsewhere, going through this nightmare. Amen, amen, amen. Link to comment
Christiana Posted July 1, 2013 Author Share Posted July 1, 2013 Hi Christiana, What were you feeling like BEFORE you started Lexapro? Also it is not clear to me, are you taking any medications now? I see in the thread that you were on Benzos? When and for how long? It's just mind boggling to me that you could have all those symptoms after 5 years of quitting Lexapro. I hope that doesn't happen to me. I recently tried quitting it cold turkey after taking it 2 months, and I had the symptoms you are describing. Still, if I felt as bad as you do, for as long, I would probably try another medication, just so I could function. And maybe it would be a good idea to take birth control pills to relieve your pain around your period. Have you had exams and/or blood tests to rule out other deficiencies? If you have medicaid, they will cover all this. Also, in terms of support, you should look into your local University/Hospital behavioral services. I don't know about where you are, but these services are usually eligible to people on social services and medicaid. I use my local University Behavioral Health Care division and get free therapy, group therapy, and psychiatry services. It took me a long time to find them and get in, but I persevered, even though it was really tough to keep calling and being persistent. Before I started taking the lexapro, I was having the usual aches and pains, as well as fatigue, from having lyme, but it wasn't to any degree that it just stopped me from being able to do and enjoy a lot of things in life, unlike what withdrawal has done to me. The only reason I was put on it, in the first place, is because I was going through a very lengthy, stressful divorce. I wasn't suffering from major depression or anxiety from it, it's just that everything that was going on was really starting to bother me. The medicine was simply meant to act as a buffer and let everything just sort of roll off of my back, per say. I was simply just going through the normal grieving process, having a few crying spells here and there, but nothing really major. As for the medications I'm taking now, please see my reply to Ed. It's only been 4 years, since I began withdrawal. I'm just now starting into my 5th year. Please don't compare my case to your own, as everyone is different. Please don't cold turkey either. If you have any doubts about that, just read some of the posts here from those that have. It's an awful way to withdrawal. I didn't make this post to scare anyone. I just know there are others here that are suffering longterm and am hoping they will reply to update me on how their symptoms are now, given how far out they are, and how they're still coping. Just some friendly, helpful advice, from those in the same boat as me, is really what I'm searching for. I had an adverse reaction to taking an SSRI. I would only be asking for more trouble, if I tried taking another one. I just so happened to find out the hard way that I'm one who should never take any SSRI medication. Period. I know there are other medications I could take that aren't SSRI's, but at the point I'm at now with withdrawal, from just trying to take one, I wouldn't dare take the chance of taking any psychoactive drug. Ever and never again. I've never been able to tolerate taking any birth control pills. They turn me into an emotional mess. Both my mother and half sister have problems taking them too. I've had plenty of tests to rule out if there is anything else going on with me. Up until recently, nothing substantial has come up. I recently found out though that my oxygen levels are low, when I'm awake and they drop even further, when I'm sleeping. I'll be having a sleep study done soon, to find out if I have sleep apnea or not. I live in a small town, so I don't have any big universities or hospitals around where I can go do that. There are a couple of places I can go though, to see a psychologist, which charge based upon a sliding fee scale. I'm entertaining the idea of, at least, seeing someone once a week or every other week, if anything, just to have someone to talk to about how I'm feeling, as I really don't have much emotional support, at all. Jun-Jul '09 (approx 7 wks) - 5mg/day Lexapro (drug rep samples) given by family dr for long, unended, very stressful divorce Each dose taken makes sicker, think it's just body adjusting, have no clue it's severe adverse reaction at time Aug '09 - pharmacy gets dr rx for, insurance won't pay, I can't afford, dr changes to Celexa, decline to take, cold turkey, necessary blessing in disguise, in hindsight at least Gradually feel some better over 1-2 wks, 3rd wk horrific withdrawal symptoms start & build, see doctor & start researching internet about what's happening, figure it out, 60-70+ severe, frightening, & debilitating symptoms emerge, realize nothing can do to feel better easily or quickly, feel like & think I'm dying, reach point where doctor gets home healthcare & have to call friend to stay with & take care of, friend abandons about 1 yr & lose home healthcare 1st yr symptoms extremely severe, 2nd yr just somewhat better, now into 3rd yr symptoms don't seem much better, still causing horrible suffering, wax & wane in severity, sometimes almost as severe as when started, practically homebound, mostly bedbound, very hard completing simple tasks, symptoms definitely much worse 7-10 days/mo around menstrual cycle Have lost vehicle & home, plus loved cat & dog had for long time, was homeless several months last winter, lived out of car, living in undesirable gov't subsidized housing now causing many troubles, have no medical & very little rx insurance, disability check & food stamps aren't enough to provide basic needs, lack any reliable personal support anymore, very isolated & all alone, have many pressing stressful things must be done, can barely or unable to complete without help don't have, even ones to help situation some, don't even have finances to get urgent necessary needed help required to help situation & self, social services is frequently visiting now, fear being polydrugged, losing everything, put into nursing home, hope & pray someone will help to keep from happening, don't know what else to do, still way to sick to return to work & college, believe I will recover, in the meantime tho have no answers except to plead for help, hope & pray someone, anyone, who truly cares does soon In 32nd mo now still very bad SSRI protracted withdrawal, have only seen few signs of healing since 2nd yr passed, somehow manage to keep fighting, afraid time is running out for best tho & situation only going to get worse trying to survive on own if don't get help from someone This pretty much summarizes what 49 little round white pills (if I recall correctly) have done to my life & future for now, my before & after life are drastically opposite now, both my situation & self, if only I'd known their potential, a little bit too late now tho huh?.?.?...hindsight really is 20/20 isn't it?.?.?... I pray God blesses and helps each and every one of us, here and elsewhere, going through this nightmare. Amen, amen, amen. Link to comment
Christiana Posted July 1, 2013 Author Share Posted July 1, 2013 I just read an article that talks about antidepressants being fat-soluble, which means that they may be stored in your tissues for many years and continue to release on their own. If that is the case with you, then maybe a long juice cleanse can help your body heal itself. Clean out your liver and other organs, etc. Kind of like what Joe Cross did in his documentary, "Sick, Fat, and nearly dead". Would you mind providing me with the url to that article? I believe that thought has been passed around a lot, but I'm not sure if there is really anything scientific to back it up. I do know I have poor phase I and II liver detox issues, so how all of that plays into my withdrawal I really don't know, but I can't imagine it's a good thing. Many with lyme disease are known to be toxic and poor detoxifiers, but I can't seem to tolerate the supplement my doctor had me taking for a long time for it, at this time. I'm sure this isn't in my favor. It's a good product, but it has so many ingredients in it, I have no idea what I'm reacting to. Cholestyramine is good at pulling toxins out, but I haven't been able to tolerate taking it either, like I had, before I started my withdrawal. Honestly, with as toxic as our world is today, it's really not a bad idea to do some kind of detox, at least once or twice a year, to rid your body of all of the toxins you can. You also must take binders and drink a lot of water too. That's just my opinion anyway. I'm not sure juicing would be able to fully accomplish that, especially to get rid of the fat soluble toxins, but I have thought about trying it, just to get some more nutrition into my body, although I have a huge learning curve in doing so. I have an infrared sauna that I'm thinking about trying to use again, to see if it will make me feel any better. The only thing is it gets hot and I've become quite sensitive to heat, since I started withdrawal. I've never seen Joe's documentary. I'll look for it though. Sherry Rogers, M.D. has written a book, called Detoxify or Die, that's a good read, if you're interested. Jun-Jul '09 (approx 7 wks) - 5mg/day Lexapro (drug rep samples) given by family dr for long, unended, very stressful divorce Each dose taken makes sicker, think it's just body adjusting, have no clue it's severe adverse reaction at time Aug '09 - pharmacy gets dr rx for, insurance won't pay, I can't afford, dr changes to Celexa, decline to take, cold turkey, necessary blessing in disguise, in hindsight at least Gradually feel some better over 1-2 wks, 3rd wk horrific withdrawal symptoms start & build, see doctor & start researching internet about what's happening, figure it out, 60-70+ severe, frightening, & debilitating symptoms emerge, realize nothing can do to feel better easily or quickly, feel like & think I'm dying, reach point where doctor gets home healthcare & have to call friend to stay with & take care of, friend abandons about 1 yr & lose home healthcare 1st yr symptoms extremely severe, 2nd yr just somewhat better, now into 3rd yr symptoms don't seem much better, still causing horrible suffering, wax & wane in severity, sometimes almost as severe as when started, practically homebound, mostly bedbound, very hard completing simple tasks, symptoms definitely much worse 7-10 days/mo around menstrual cycle Have lost vehicle & home, plus loved cat & dog had for long time, was homeless several months last winter, lived out of car, living in undesirable gov't subsidized housing now causing many troubles, have no medical & very little rx insurance, disability check & food stamps aren't enough to provide basic needs, lack any reliable personal support anymore, very isolated & all alone, have many pressing stressful things must be done, can barely or unable to complete without help don't have, even ones to help situation some, don't even have finances to get urgent necessary needed help required to help situation & self, social services is frequently visiting now, fear being polydrugged, losing everything, put into nursing home, hope & pray someone will help to keep from happening, don't know what else to do, still way to sick to return to work & college, believe I will recover, in the meantime tho have no answers except to plead for help, hope & pray someone, anyone, who truly cares does soon In 32nd mo now still very bad SSRI protracted withdrawal, have only seen few signs of healing since 2nd yr passed, somehow manage to keep fighting, afraid time is running out for best tho & situation only going to get worse trying to survive on own if don't get help from someone This pretty much summarizes what 49 little round white pills (if I recall correctly) have done to my life & future for now, my before & after life are drastically opposite now, both my situation & self, if only I'd known their potential, a little bit too late now tho huh?.?.?...hindsight really is 20/20 isn't it?.?.?... I pray God blesses and helps each and every one of us, here and elsewhere, going through this nightmare. Amen, amen, amen. Link to comment
Christiana Posted July 1, 2013 Author Share Posted July 1, 2013 I just want to clarify a few things. If I have come across that I'm feeling as bad as I did when I first started my withdrawal, I apologize. That is simply not the case. After 4 years now, I do still suffer a lot, but on a scale of 1-10, with 10 being the worst, the numbers always fluctuate on a daily basis, sometimes hourly. I also want to mention that I have some chronic health problems, as well as the fact that the past 4 years has been and sometimes still is very stressful for me. As you can see in my signature, I've been through a lot and have encountered even more stressful events, since I wrote it, plus I've suffered from taking supplements and medications that just don't agree with me like they used to. I recently found out my oxygen is low when I'm awake and drops even lower when I'm sleeping. So, I may have sleep apnea, which could be a contributing factor to my symptoms. I'm going to get tested and find out soon. I haven't exactly been able to pamper my hypersensitive nervous system for very long either. Life has just kept throwing one stressor after another at me. I realize the world isn't going to stop, just because I'm in withdrawal. If only I could find some sort of reprieve from it and all the things I still have on my plate, but am unable to do, I think I would be better off than I am now. The thing is I live alone, have lost all of my friends, lack emotional support, etc., which makes the whole withdrawal process even more difficult for me. If you have any helpful insights, I'd sure love to hear them... Jun-Jul '09 (approx 7 wks) - 5mg/day Lexapro (drug rep samples) given by family dr for long, unended, very stressful divorce Each dose taken makes sicker, think it's just body adjusting, have no clue it's severe adverse reaction at time Aug '09 - pharmacy gets dr rx for, insurance won't pay, I can't afford, dr changes to Celexa, decline to take, cold turkey, necessary blessing in disguise, in hindsight at least Gradually feel some better over 1-2 wks, 3rd wk horrific withdrawal symptoms start & build, see doctor & start researching internet about what's happening, figure it out, 60-70+ severe, frightening, & debilitating symptoms emerge, realize nothing can do to feel better easily or quickly, feel like & think I'm dying, reach point where doctor gets home healthcare & have to call friend to stay with & take care of, friend abandons about 1 yr & lose home healthcare 1st yr symptoms extremely severe, 2nd yr just somewhat better, now into 3rd yr symptoms don't seem much better, still causing horrible suffering, wax & wane in severity, sometimes almost as severe as when started, practically homebound, mostly bedbound, very hard completing simple tasks, symptoms definitely much worse 7-10 days/mo around menstrual cycle Have lost vehicle & home, plus loved cat & dog had for long time, was homeless several months last winter, lived out of car, living in undesirable gov't subsidized housing now causing many troubles, have no medical & very little rx insurance, disability check & food stamps aren't enough to provide basic needs, lack any reliable personal support anymore, very isolated & all alone, have many pressing stressful things must be done, can barely or unable to complete without help don't have, even ones to help situation some, don't even have finances to get urgent necessary needed help required to help situation & self, social services is frequently visiting now, fear being polydrugged, losing everything, put into nursing home, hope & pray someone will help to keep from happening, don't know what else to do, still way to sick to return to work & college, believe I will recover, in the meantime tho have no answers except to plead for help, hope & pray someone, anyone, who truly cares does soon In 32nd mo now still very bad SSRI protracted withdrawal, have only seen few signs of healing since 2nd yr passed, somehow manage to keep fighting, afraid time is running out for best tho & situation only going to get worse trying to survive on own if don't get help from someone This pretty much summarizes what 49 little round white pills (if I recall correctly) have done to my life & future for now, my before & after life are drastically opposite now, both my situation & self, if only I'd known their potential, a little bit too late now tho huh?.?.?...hindsight really is 20/20 isn't it?.?.?... I pray God blesses and helps each and every one of us, here and elsewhere, going through this nightmare. Amen, amen, amen. Link to comment
UnfoldingSky Posted July 1, 2013 Share Posted July 1, 2013 HI Christiana, I feel for you, and can relate to a lot of what you write, though I am doing a lot better than I was at the outset of my own experience. I suffered a reaction to a related drug, Celexa, and am now seven years out from the reaction, and about two and a half years drug free. I have had some resolution to a good number of symptoms, often via very alternative means and sometimes just because they healed with time. I have never written my story here because it is quite involved, and very traumatizing to revisit, but I could try to sum it up a bit if it would help you. I still struggle with memory loss (at one point on a number of drugs which cause memory loss and amnesia I had lost almost all of my memory, so even though I still have issues things have greatly improved), exhaustion, dizziness, stress intolerance (though this has improved a lot), lack of foresight/insight/motivation, poor concentration, and some other cognitive complaints, plus a lingering sadness over what happened, as well as what I think is called akinesia (which I have to put down to drugs, as I have no other health issues to explain it--basically it is a difficultly sometimes initiating movement, but it's very mild), and some very mild and now thankfully rarely occuring twitching/uncontrollable movements. As bad as all of that sounds, it's a dream compared to the early days. Many of my early symptoms are gone, from zaps to akathisia. So, I have improved. One thing I found that made a big difference was healing the DP/DR. That was a key step and something I accomplished by going well outside of mainstream medicine. After that, I found I was able to tolerate a number of different treatments which I would not have in the past (not drugs, I mean herbs and other things), and from there started to work on treating different issues. It has been a very involved process. You mentioned that you have Lyme, I would expect that would contribute a fair amount to what is happening now. Were you on the infamous other site? If so, or even if you weren't, there was a member there whose posts I used to read, Johnny Off Paxil I believe was his name, whom also had Lyme and had had a reaction. My memory is not great but I believe he posted that he had recovered. Perhaps his posts would be of help to you. If they still exist that is. Are you being treated for the Lyme in any way now? Also, you mention hypoadrenalism, is that from Lyme, or something else? I don't know a lot about Lyme, so wondered. And have you checked to see exactly what that would do vis a vis withdrawal? Also it sounds like we have some similar relationship circumstances. For a number of reasons most of my friends are gone as well. I do have a little support but could always use more. Family are still around and help, but they are tired of this as am I and have their own issues too. Anyway if you want to talk feel free to PM me. I am not always able to respond right away as I get so spaced out and i do forget things, but do check in here pretty regularly. Take care. I am not a medical professional and nothing I say is a medical opinion or meant to be medical advice, please seek a competent and trusted medical professional to consult for all medical decisions. Link to comment
UnfoldingSky Posted July 1, 2013 Share Posted July 1, 2013 I'm not sure juicing would be able to fully accomplish that, especially to get rid of the fat soluble toxins, but I have thought about trying it, just to get some more nutrition into my body, although I have a huge learning curve in doing so. Hi again Christiana, just wanted to interject-- Early on in withdrawal I tried a detox, involving various large doses of vitamins. It nearly put me in hospital (though I felt a bit better after the fact.) It caused my body temp to rollercoaster, it was quite startling how dramatic the reaction to it was. Over the years from reading around I have gathered that at least in acute phases of withdrawal it's not a good idea to try a detox. I would also be wary if you still feel really badly this far along. Also, if you take drugs for seizures or other conditions, some detoxes can affect how quickly you process the drugs. Not to be an alarmist, but, I know someone whom took a seizure drug in combination with milk thistle, which acts on the liver, and it wasn't helpful. Apparently it is thought the plant caused him to digest the drug too quickly--and he wound up having a seizure as a result. I don't know what juicing would do, but if you have other health issues and are on drugs, please, get a competent medical professional to advise you before doing anything. And be aware (as you probably are, this far out) that they won't likely know much of anything about how detoxes affect withdrawal or lingering reaction issues. They may not even recognize them for what they are. I am not a medical professional and nothing I say is a medical opinion or meant to be medical advice, please seek a competent and trusted medical professional to consult for all medical decisions. Link to comment
Iggy131313 Posted July 1, 2013 Share Posted July 1, 2013 christiana, do you have epliepsy also then or was something else causing your seizures? hydrocortisone I have read has really ramped up peoples symptoms, is that a large dose you are taking? damaged by citalopram - severe suffering for 3 years now...no improvement akathsiia, pgad, dp/dr, terror, and so SO many more daily severly disabled and lost everything Link to comment
Iggy131313 Posted July 1, 2013 Share Posted July 1, 2013 (edited) oh and why do you take the anti nausea drug? That drug effects transmitters and may also aggrivate things? I dont know that, maybe Alto will know more about the drugs you are taking more, but this is what it says on wiki about it Ondansetron (INN) (/ɒnˈdænsɛtrɒn/; developed and first marketed by GlaxoSmithKline as Zofran) is a serotonin 5-HT3 receptor antagonist used mainly as an antiemetic (to treat nausea and vomiting), often following chemotherapy. It affects both peripheral and central nerves.%5B1%5D Ondansetron reduces the activity of the vagus nerve, which deactivates the vomiting center in the medulla oblongata, and also blocks serotonin receptors in the chemoreceptor trigger zone. It has little effect on vomiting caused by motion sickness, and does not have any effect on dopamine receptors or muscarinic receptors. have you noticed feeling worse/better when you take more/less of the anti nausea drug? Edited August 13, 2015 by Petunia fixed text damaged by citalopram - severe suffering for 3 years now...no improvement akathsiia, pgad, dp/dr, terror, and so SO many more daily severly disabled and lost everything Link to comment
Lilu Posted July 1, 2013 Share Posted July 1, 2013 Christiana:I am so sorry to hear of your suffering. I do not know much about Lexapro, but I anticipate that those who do will respond soon. I imagine they will want to know if you are taking any other medications (not just psychotropics) or supplements.Sincerely,Ed Thank you very much, Ed. I'm not taking any supplements, except I do drink 1-2 ensure a day, to try to make up for what I'm lacking in nutrients, from not having much of an appetite and eating much. The only medications I take, which I was taking before withdrawal and not having any problems with are: 20mg/day hydrocortisone for hypoadrenalism 60mg/day armour thyroid for hypothyroidism 40mg/day diazepam for seizures 10/325 mg hydrocodone/day - I can take 2 every 5 hrs., as needed (a max of 10/day), so my dose isn't consistent - on average, some days I only take 6, whereas other days I take 10 Sometimes, I'll take either 4mg or 8mg of ondansetron for nausea, but not on a daily/consistent basis I've taken numerous supplements and medications, besides the aforementioned ones, but they all just make my symptoms worse. I realize withdrawal can cause sensitivities to such substances for quite some time, thus I've quit trying to take anything else, for now. Hi Christiana, It would be helpful if you put your drug history in your signature, and all that you wrote in your signature into an Intro topic post. I would never suggest a detox, even a juicing one to a person who is taking that many medications. You would have to consult a physician on that. Also, I believe that it is foolish to think that all those drugs you are taking are not having any side effects on you. My God, that is quite a coctail of drugs you are on. ALL DRUGS HAVE SIDE EFFECTS. Whether you know it or not. I found this out the hard way. Even seemingly "innocent" drugs that you think have nothing to do with the brain, do indeed affect the brain! I recently found out that antihistamines are actually mild antidepressants, and that Prozac was developed from Benadryl. Also many stomach meds, such as Reglan and Zantac, can actually cause depression and psychosis. I'm mentioning these as an example. Your dose of hydrocodone is staggering. That is a highly addictive substance and will cause major withdrawal if you try to get off. If I take even ONE of those, I'm sleeping for the next 24 hours. Same goes with any kind of Benzo. Even a dose as tiny as .25 mg can cause sedating effects for 24 to 36 hours. But the fact that you are taking a benzo and an opiate at the same time, and at the insane doses that you are, well, no wonder you cant function! Granted, I don't know your whole story, but I can't see how you can possibly recover as long as you are taking all these drugs. 2005-2008: Effexor; 1/2008 Tapered 3 months, then quit. 7/2008-2009 Reinstated Effexor (crying spells at start of new job.) 2009-3/2013: Switched to Pristiq 50 mg then 100 mg 3/2013: Switched to Lexapro 10mg. Cut down to 5 mg. CT for 2 weeks then reinstated for 6 weeks 8/2013-8/2014: Tapering Lexapro (Lots of withdrawal symptoms) 11/2014 -8/2015: Developed severe insomnia and uncontrollable daily crying spells 12/2014-6/2015: Tried Ambien, Klonopin, Ativan, Lunesta, Sonata, Trazadone, Seroquel, Rameron, Gabapentin - Developed Anxiety disorder, PTSD, and Psychogenic Myoclonus 7/2015-1/2016: Reinstated Lexapro 2 mg (mild improvement, but crying spells still present) 1/2016-5/2017: Lexapro 5 mg ( helped a lot, but poor stress tolerance & depressive episodes) 5/20/2017 - Raised dose to Lexapro 10 mg due to lingering depression(Total of 2 failed tapers & severe PAWS) 9/11/2018 - Present: Still on 10 mg Lexapro and mostly recovered.(Anxiety still triggers Myoclonus.) 10/7/2022 - 20 mg Lexapro (brand only) Plus occasional Klonopin for anxiety and Ambien for insomnia. Link to comment
Iggy131313 Posted July 1, 2013 Share Posted July 1, 2013 (edited) I agree that the drugs you are taking could have an impact on your recovery, but also it would be unwise to suddenly stop taking any of these substances...especially if you need them for medical reasons. what are they all for honey? are the pain killers for withdrawal pain or for something else? have you tried cutting back on them before? Its a real tricky one, maybe alto or rhi might know a little more and have some suggestions, regarding your painkiller, it seems its a cns depressant (like benzos) now, it could be that its helping your symptoms by keeping the cns sedated, or you could possibly be getting rebound OR as alto has said many times about certain drugs, it could be that they have turned paradoxical on you, here is some info on the painkillers you are on Hydrocodone, like other analgesics, should be administered with caution to patients with head injuries, acute undiagnosed abdominal pain, acute alcoholism, delirium tremens, hypothyroidism, severe renal disease, severe liver disease, pulmonary disease, myxedema (or hypothyroidism), CNS depression, coma, toxic psychosis, Addison's disease, gall bladder[/size] disease, prostatic hypertrophy, urethral stricture, kyphoscoliosis, and general debilitation. Hydrocodone should also be administered with caution to patients following gastrointestinal surgery.Hydrocodone, like other narcotic analgesics, may be habit forming.Hydrocodone may impair the mental abilities necessary for potentially hazardous tasks such as driving or operating machinery.The CNS depressant effects of hydrocodone may be increased by other CNS depressants such as alcohol, sedatives, hypnotics, tranquilizers, phenothiazines, and general anesthetics.Read more at http://www.drugs.com/dosage/acetaminophen-hydrocodone.html#VGcXfuy0Qb14Sbov.99 Edited August 13, 2015 by Petunia fixed text damaged by citalopram - severe suffering for 3 years now...no improvement akathsiia, pgad, dp/dr, terror, and so SO many more daily severly disabled and lost everything Link to comment
Iggy131313 Posted July 1, 2013 Share Posted July 1, 2013 (edited) did you say you have issues with your liver? also here you say this 10/325 mg hydrocodone/day - I can take 2 every 5 hrs., as needed (a max of 10/day), so my dose isn't consistent - on average, some days I only take 6, whereas other days I take 10 what dose are the pills? I cant see how you could take 325mg perday if your pills are 10mg and you can take a max of 10 per day? surely that would be a max of 100? or do you sometimes take more? Not judging or blaming your meds for this, no way, just want to get as clear a picture as possible, as it could be possible you are having withdrawal from all these substances also....I cut down my cigerettes by half and immediatly felt withdrawal from it, new kinds of headaches and other stuff, when I went back up on my cigerettes, these new symptoms went away, we are so very sensitive to even the smallest changes, you might be better keeping your dose of everything as steady as possible until you are ready to taper? But again I will say I am just speculating, Im no expert but hope that the experts will be along soon to offer more advice Edited August 13, 2015 by Petunia fixed text damaged by citalopram - severe suffering for 3 years now...no improvement akathsiia, pgad, dp/dr, terror, and so SO many more daily severly disabled and lost everything Link to comment
Christiana Posted July 2, 2013 Author Share Posted July 2, 2013 HI Christiana, I feel for you, and can relate to a lot of what you write, though I am doing a lot better than I was at the outset of my own experience. I suffered a reaction to a related drug, Celexa, and am now seven years out from the reaction, and about two and a half years drug free. I have had some resolution to a good number of symptoms, often via very alternative means and sometimes just because they healed with time. I have never written my story here because it is quite involved, and very traumatizing to revisit, but I could try to sum it up a bit if it would help you. I still struggle with memory loss (at one point on a number of drugs which cause memory loss and amnesia I had lost almost all of my memory, so even though I still have issues things have greatly improved), exhaustion, dizziness, stress intolerance (though this has improved a lot), lack of foresight/insight/motivation, poor concentration, and some other cognitive complaints, plus a lingering sadness over what happened, as well as what I think is called akinesia (which I have to put down to drugs, as I have no other health issues to explain it--basically it is a difficultly sometimes initiating movement, but it's very mild), and some very mild and now thankfully rarely occuring twitching/uncontrollable movements. As bad as all of that sounds, it's a dream compared to the early days. Many of my early symptoms are gone, from zaps to akathisia. So, I have improved. One thing I found that made a big difference was healing the DP/DR. That was a key step and something I accomplished by going well outside of mainstream medicine. After that, I found I was able to tolerate a number of different treatments which I would not have in the past (not drugs, I mean herbs and other things), and from there started to work on treating different issues. It has been a very involved process. You mentioned that you have Lyme, I would expect that would contribute a fair amount to what is happening now. Were you on the infamous other site? If so, or even if you weren't, there was a member there whose posts I used to read, Johnny Off Paxil I believe was his name, whom also had Lyme and had had a reaction. My memory is not great but I believe he posted that he had recovered. Perhaps his posts would be of help to you. If they still exist that is. Are you being treated for the Lyme in any way now? Also, you mention hypoadrenalism, is that from Lyme, or something else? I don't know a lot about Lyme, so wondered. And have you checked to see exactly what that would do vis a vis withdrawal? Also it sounds like we have some similar relationship circumstances. For a number of reasons most of my friends are gone as well. I do have a little support but could always use more. Family are still around and help, but they are tired of this as am I and have their own issues too. Anyway if you want to talk feel free to PM me. I am not always able to respond right away as I get so spaced out and i do forget things, but do check in here pretty regularly. Take care. Hi US, Thank you so much for sharing your story with me! I don't have all of the symptoms that you had or still have, but I do have quite a few of them. I'm happy to hear that you've recovered so much and continue to! I wish you many more improvements in the future! ***I'm happy to hear you've healed your DP/DR! That's a big step, in my opinion! I'm interested in hearing more about how you healed yourself from it, if you don't mind sharing that information with me. I think if I could heal myself from that, I'd feel a lot better also. I just don't know what to do, so any help in that area you could give me, I'd be very grateful for.*** Thank you for letting me know about the guy from the other site, which I used to visit a lot, until I found a much better one, meaning this one! I'll go back there, just to read some of his posts and even try to see if I can contact him to chat about how he's doing now. Since I'm still very hypersensitive to a lot of supplements and medications, I'm unable to treat my lyme. Before I started withdrawal I was doing pretty well with it. I know my body well, as I've had it for many years, so even though withdrawal and lyme share some of the same symptoms, I can honestly say it's not my main problem, at this time. There's a fine line, when defining the symptoms between the two, but I do know what's coming from what. There's no clear cut answer as to whether or not I developed hypoadrenalism from having lyme, but it's highly likely. The medication that I take for it though keeps it under control. I'm sure having lyme isn't making my withdrawal any easier, but as to what degree it affects withdrawal, I don't really know and there aren't any studies, that I know of, which I can refer to. I'm sorry to hear our relationship circumstances are alike! I think it goes hand in hand with a lot of people, when they get sick. Thank you for the offer to PM you! I hope your spaciness and forgetfulness improve! You take care too! I wish you nothing but the very best with the rest of your recovery! Thanks again for taking the time to share where you are in your journey with withdrawal with me! Jun-Jul '09 (approx 7 wks) - 5mg/day Lexapro (drug rep samples) given by family dr for long, unended, very stressful divorce Each dose taken makes sicker, think it's just body adjusting, have no clue it's severe adverse reaction at time Aug '09 - pharmacy gets dr rx for, insurance won't pay, I can't afford, dr changes to Celexa, decline to take, cold turkey, necessary blessing in disguise, in hindsight at least Gradually feel some better over 1-2 wks, 3rd wk horrific withdrawal symptoms start & build, see doctor & start researching internet about what's happening, figure it out, 60-70+ severe, frightening, & debilitating symptoms emerge, realize nothing can do to feel better easily or quickly, feel like & think I'm dying, reach point where doctor gets home healthcare & have to call friend to stay with & take care of, friend abandons about 1 yr & lose home healthcare 1st yr symptoms extremely severe, 2nd yr just somewhat better, now into 3rd yr symptoms don't seem much better, still causing horrible suffering, wax & wane in severity, sometimes almost as severe as when started, practically homebound, mostly bedbound, very hard completing simple tasks, symptoms definitely much worse 7-10 days/mo around menstrual cycle Have lost vehicle & home, plus loved cat & dog had for long time, was homeless several months last winter, lived out of car, living in undesirable gov't subsidized housing now causing many troubles, have no medical & very little rx insurance, disability check & food stamps aren't enough to provide basic needs, lack any reliable personal support anymore, very isolated & all alone, have many pressing stressful things must be done, can barely or unable to complete without help don't have, even ones to help situation some, don't even have finances to get urgent necessary needed help required to help situation & self, social services is frequently visiting now, fear being polydrugged, losing everything, put into nursing home, hope & pray someone will help to keep from happening, don't know what else to do, still way to sick to return to work & college, believe I will recover, in the meantime tho have no answers except to plead for help, hope & pray someone, anyone, who truly cares does soon In 32nd mo now still very bad SSRI protracted withdrawal, have only seen few signs of healing since 2nd yr passed, somehow manage to keep fighting, afraid time is running out for best tho & situation only going to get worse trying to survive on own if don't get help from someone This pretty much summarizes what 49 little round white pills (if I recall correctly) have done to my life & future for now, my before & after life are drastically opposite now, both my situation & self, if only I'd known their potential, a little bit too late now tho huh?.?.?...hindsight really is 20/20 isn't it?.?.?... I pray God blesses and helps each and every one of us, here and elsewhere, going through this nightmare. Amen, amen, amen. Link to comment
Christiana Posted July 2, 2013 Author Share Posted July 2, 2013 I'm not sure juicing would be able to fully accomplish that, especially to get rid of the fat soluble toxins, but I have thought about trying it, just to get some more nutrition into my body, although I have a huge learning curve in doing so. Hi again Christiana, just wanted to interject-- Early on in withdrawal I tried a detox, involving various large doses of vitamins. It nearly put me in hospital (though I felt a bit better after the fact.) It caused my body temp to rollercoaster, it was quite startling how dramatic the reaction to it was. Over the years from reading around I have gathered that at least in acute phases of withdrawal it's not a good idea to try a detox. I would also be wary if you still feel really badly this far along. Also, if you take drugs for seizures or other conditions, some detoxes can affect how quickly you process the drugs. Not to be an alarmist, but, I know someone whom took a seizure drug in combination with milk thistle, which acts on the liver, and it wasn't helpful. Apparently it is thought the plant caused him to digest the drug too quickly--and he wound up having a seizure as a result. I don't know what juicing would do, but if you have other health issues and are on drugs, please, get a competent medical professional to advise you before doing anything. And be aware (as you probably are, this far out) that they won't likely know much of anything about how detoxes affect withdrawal or lingering reaction issues. They may not even recognize them for what they are. Hi again US! Oh my gosh! I'm so sorry to hear you reacted to a detox so bad! Bless you! I wary of trying to detox also. I've tried a few things, while in withdrawal, some of which have made me very ill and others of which have actually made me feel a bit better, but I'd definitely not try anything drastic, at this point. Yes, I'm very aware of how detoxes can affect drugs you take. I'm so sorry to hear what the person you mentioned went through! I'd never, ever, attempt to detox without the advice of my physician, especially now that my nervous system is so hypersensitive. I agree, there is know way to know, for sure, how a detox is going to affect you in withdrawal. I believe the same hold true, even if you aren't in withdrawal. Fortunately, I've been with the same physician for over 15 years, I think it is now, so they know my health history quite well. Jun-Jul '09 (approx 7 wks) - 5mg/day Lexapro (drug rep samples) given by family dr for long, unended, very stressful divorce Each dose taken makes sicker, think it's just body adjusting, have no clue it's severe adverse reaction at time Aug '09 - pharmacy gets dr rx for, insurance won't pay, I can't afford, dr changes to Celexa, decline to take, cold turkey, necessary blessing in disguise, in hindsight at least Gradually feel some better over 1-2 wks, 3rd wk horrific withdrawal symptoms start & build, see doctor & start researching internet about what's happening, figure it out, 60-70+ severe, frightening, & debilitating symptoms emerge, realize nothing can do to feel better easily or quickly, feel like & think I'm dying, reach point where doctor gets home healthcare & have to call friend to stay with & take care of, friend abandons about 1 yr & lose home healthcare 1st yr symptoms extremely severe, 2nd yr just somewhat better, now into 3rd yr symptoms don't seem much better, still causing horrible suffering, wax & wane in severity, sometimes almost as severe as when started, practically homebound, mostly bedbound, very hard completing simple tasks, symptoms definitely much worse 7-10 days/mo around menstrual cycle Have lost vehicle & home, plus loved cat & dog had for long time, was homeless several months last winter, lived out of car, living in undesirable gov't subsidized housing now causing many troubles, have no medical & very little rx insurance, disability check & food stamps aren't enough to provide basic needs, lack any reliable personal support anymore, very isolated & all alone, have many pressing stressful things must be done, can barely or unable to complete without help don't have, even ones to help situation some, don't even have finances to get urgent necessary needed help required to help situation & self, social services is frequently visiting now, fear being polydrugged, losing everything, put into nursing home, hope & pray someone will help to keep from happening, don't know what else to do, still way to sick to return to work & college, believe I will recover, in the meantime tho have no answers except to plead for help, hope & pray someone, anyone, who truly cares does soon In 32nd mo now still very bad SSRI protracted withdrawal, have only seen few signs of healing since 2nd yr passed, somehow manage to keep fighting, afraid time is running out for best tho & situation only going to get worse trying to survive on own if don't get help from someone This pretty much summarizes what 49 little round white pills (if I recall correctly) have done to my life & future for now, my before & after life are drastically opposite now, both my situation & self, if only I'd known their potential, a little bit too late now tho huh?.?.?...hindsight really is 20/20 isn't it?.?.?... I pray God blesses and helps each and every one of us, here and elsewhere, going through this nightmare. Amen, amen, amen. Link to comment
Christiana Posted July 2, 2013 Author Share Posted July 2, 2013 christiana, do you have epliepsy also then or was something else causing your seizures? hydrocortisone I have read has really ramped up peoples symptoms, is that a large dose you are taking? Hi Iggy, I've had seizures, before I even started withdrawal. The dose isn't large, in comparison to what my body needs, no. It made my anxiety worse, when I was in my really acute early phase of withdrawal, but it no longer does that. I have to have it though, because my adrenals don't make all of the hormone my body needs. Jun-Jul '09 (approx 7 wks) - 5mg/day Lexapro (drug rep samples) given by family dr for long, unended, very stressful divorce Each dose taken makes sicker, think it's just body adjusting, have no clue it's severe adverse reaction at time Aug '09 - pharmacy gets dr rx for, insurance won't pay, I can't afford, dr changes to Celexa, decline to take, cold turkey, necessary blessing in disguise, in hindsight at least Gradually feel some better over 1-2 wks, 3rd wk horrific withdrawal symptoms start & build, see doctor & start researching internet about what's happening, figure it out, 60-70+ severe, frightening, & debilitating symptoms emerge, realize nothing can do to feel better easily or quickly, feel like & think I'm dying, reach point where doctor gets home healthcare & have to call friend to stay with & take care of, friend abandons about 1 yr & lose home healthcare 1st yr symptoms extremely severe, 2nd yr just somewhat better, now into 3rd yr symptoms don't seem much better, still causing horrible suffering, wax & wane in severity, sometimes almost as severe as when started, practically homebound, mostly bedbound, very hard completing simple tasks, symptoms definitely much worse 7-10 days/mo around menstrual cycle Have lost vehicle & home, plus loved cat & dog had for long time, was homeless several months last winter, lived out of car, living in undesirable gov't subsidized housing now causing many troubles, have no medical & very little rx insurance, disability check & food stamps aren't enough to provide basic needs, lack any reliable personal support anymore, very isolated & all alone, have many pressing stressful things must be done, can barely or unable to complete without help don't have, even ones to help situation some, don't even have finances to get urgent necessary needed help required to help situation & self, social services is frequently visiting now, fear being polydrugged, losing everything, put into nursing home, hope & pray someone will help to keep from happening, don't know what else to do, still way to sick to return to work & college, believe I will recover, in the meantime tho have no answers except to plead for help, hope & pray someone, anyone, who truly cares does soon In 32nd mo now still very bad SSRI protracted withdrawal, have only seen few signs of healing since 2nd yr passed, somehow manage to keep fighting, afraid time is running out for best tho & situation only going to get worse trying to survive on own if don't get help from someone This pretty much summarizes what 49 little round white pills (if I recall correctly) have done to my life & future for now, my before & after life are drastically opposite now, both my situation & self, if only I'd known their potential, a little bit too late now tho huh?.?.?...hindsight really is 20/20 isn't it?.?.?... I pray God blesses and helps each and every one of us, here and elsewhere, going through this nightmare. Amen, amen, amen. Link to comment
Christiana Posted July 2, 2013 Author Share Posted July 2, 2013 oh and why do you take the anti nausea drug? That drug effects transmitters and may also aggrivate things? I dont know that, maybe Alto will know more about the drugs you are taking more, but this is what it says on wiki about it Ondansetron (INN) (/ɒnˈdænsɛtrɒn/; developed and first marketed by GlaxoSmithKline as Zofran) is a serotonin 5-HT3 receptor antagonist used mainly as an antiemetic (to treat nausea and vomiting), often following chemotherapy. It affects both peripheral and central nerves.[1] Ondansetron reduces the activity of the vagus nerve, which deactivates the vomiting center in the medulla oblongata, and also blocks serotonin receptors in the chemoreceptor trigger zone. It has little effect on vomiting caused by motion sickness, and does not have any effect on dopamine receptors or muscarinic receptors. have you noticed feeling worse/better when you take more/less of the anti nausea drug? Hi Iggy, Thank you very much for the info! Since Alto and GiaK provided me with some info about it, which I was unaware of, I only take it now, when my nausea is really bad. Usually, it's only around my period and I take the least amount, as possible. Sometimes it helps. Sometimes it doesn't. I have noticed, when I do take it, it does seem to help me with my apathy/anhedonia/lack of motivation. At times, I used to take it just to help me with that. Knowing what I know about it now though, I no longer do that. I'm very grateful they provided me with the info they did, because even though it was doing that, I refuse to mess with my already hypersensitive nervous system, but instead choose to just let it rest, as best as I can. Jun-Jul '09 (approx 7 wks) - 5mg/day Lexapro (drug rep samples) given by family dr for long, unended, very stressful divorce Each dose taken makes sicker, think it's just body adjusting, have no clue it's severe adverse reaction at time Aug '09 - pharmacy gets dr rx for, insurance won't pay, I can't afford, dr changes to Celexa, decline to take, cold turkey, necessary blessing in disguise, in hindsight at least Gradually feel some better over 1-2 wks, 3rd wk horrific withdrawal symptoms start & build, see doctor & start researching internet about what's happening, figure it out, 60-70+ severe, frightening, & debilitating symptoms emerge, realize nothing can do to feel better easily or quickly, feel like & think I'm dying, reach point where doctor gets home healthcare & have to call friend to stay with & take care of, friend abandons about 1 yr & lose home healthcare 1st yr symptoms extremely severe, 2nd yr just somewhat better, now into 3rd yr symptoms don't seem much better, still causing horrible suffering, wax & wane in severity, sometimes almost as severe as when started, practically homebound, mostly bedbound, very hard completing simple tasks, symptoms definitely much worse 7-10 days/mo around menstrual cycle Have lost vehicle & home, plus loved cat & dog had for long time, was homeless several months last winter, lived out of car, living in undesirable gov't subsidized housing now causing many troubles, have no medical & very little rx insurance, disability check & food stamps aren't enough to provide basic needs, lack any reliable personal support anymore, very isolated & all alone, have many pressing stressful things must be done, can barely or unable to complete without help don't have, even ones to help situation some, don't even have finances to get urgent necessary needed help required to help situation & self, social services is frequently visiting now, fear being polydrugged, losing everything, put into nursing home, hope & pray someone will help to keep from happening, don't know what else to do, still way to sick to return to work & college, believe I will recover, in the meantime tho have no answers except to plead for help, hope & pray someone, anyone, who truly cares does soon In 32nd mo now still very bad SSRI protracted withdrawal, have only seen few signs of healing since 2nd yr passed, somehow manage to keep fighting, afraid time is running out for best tho & situation only going to get worse trying to survive on own if don't get help from someone This pretty much summarizes what 49 little round white pills (if I recall correctly) have done to my life & future for now, my before & after life are drastically opposite now, both my situation & self, if only I'd known their potential, a little bit too late now tho huh?.?.?...hindsight really is 20/20 isn't it?.?.?... I pray God blesses and helps each and every one of us, here and elsewhere, going through this nightmare. Amen, amen, amen. Link to comment
Christiana Posted July 2, 2013 Author Share Posted July 2, 2013 Christiana:I am so sorry to hear of your suffering. I do not know much about Lexapro, but I anticipate that those who do will respond soon. I imagine they will want to know if you are taking any other medications (not just psychotropics) or supplements.Sincerely,Ed Thank you very much, Ed. I'm not taking any supplements, except I do drink 1-2 ensure a day, to try to make up for what I'm lacking in nutrients, from not having much of an appetite and eating much. The only medications I take, which I was taking before withdrawal and not having any problems with are: 20mg/day hydrocortisone for hypoadrenalism 60mg/day armour thyroid for hypothyroidism 40mg/day diazepam for seizures 10/325 mg hydrocodone/day - I can take 2 every 5 hrs., as needed (a max of 10/day), so my dose isn't consistent - on average, some days I only take 6, whereas other days I take 10 Sometimes, I'll take either 4mg or 8mg of ondansetron for nausea, but not on a daily/consistent basis I've taken numerous supplements and medications, besides the aforementioned ones, but they all just make my symptoms worse. I realize withdrawal can cause sensitivities to such substances for quite some time, thus I've quit trying to take anything else, for now. Hi Christiana, It would be helpful if you put your drug history in your signature, and all that you wrote in your signature into an Intro topic post. I would never suggest a detox, even a juicing one to a person who is taking that many medications. You would have to consult a physician on that. Also, I believe that it is foolish to think that all those drugs you are taking are not having any side effects on you. My God, that is quite a coctail of drugs you are on. ALL DRUGS HAVE SIDE EFFECTS. Whether you know it or not. I found this out the hard way. Even seemingly "innocent" drugs that you think have nothing to do with the brain, do indeed affect the brain! I recently found out that antihistamines are actually mild antidepressants, and that Prozac was developed from Benadryl. Also many stomach meds, such as Reglan and Zantac, can actually cause depression and psychosis. I'm mentioning these as an example. Your dose of hydrocodone is staggering. That is a highly addictive substance and will cause major withdrawal if you try to get off. If I take even ONE of those, I'm sleeping for the next 24 hours. Same goes with any kind of Benzo. Even a dose as tiny as .25 mg can cause sedating effects for 24 to 36 hours. But the fact that you are taking a benzo and an opiate at the same time, and at the insane doses that you are, well, no wonder you cant function! Granted, I don't know your whole story, but I can't see how you can possibly recover as long as you are taking all these drugs. Hi Lilu, I'll put editing my signature on my list of things to do. I do think it would be helpful for me to include my medication history. I'd never, ever, attempt any detox, without the advice of my physician of many years. I am far from foolish. I realize all drugs have side effects and some that you think wouldn't even affect the brain actually do. I'm even aware of the examples of the ones you mentioned. If you're against taking any drugs, just because they have side effects, then that's your choice. There are some people though, such as myself, who have to rely upon certain ones to live. I don't consider myself to be on "quite a cocktail of drugs" nor am I taking a "staggering" dose of hydrocodone or diazepam either. Although they may affect you very poorly, that simply isn't the case, with me. I'm not taking "insane doses", which are affecting my ability to function either. There is also no reason to believe I can't recover, as long as I'm taking the drugs that I am, as well. I've been taking all four of them, since before I began withdrawal, without having any problems, and the same remains. My health dictates that I must have them, thus it would deteriorate further, should I not. You really should have taken the time to get to know more about my situation, by reading some of my posts, before you posted what you have to me. You've assumed way too much and interjected too many of your own beliefs, without taking it into consideration. The tone of your post, given the words you use, is quite degrading to me. It's certainly not the support I need, while I'm going through the most difficult time in my life. First of all, I've had lyme disease for nearly 25 years. That alone causes me a lot of pain. If I didn't take something for pain, I honestly wouldn't be able to function, at all. I keep my hydrocodone doses to a minimum, only taking them, when necessary, and have never abused them. It simply dampens my pain. Notice I said dampens. If I so desired, I could be taking a lot stronger pain med(s) than it. Instead, I opt to take the least amount, as possible, to where my pain is, at least, tolerable, and deal with the rest of it on my own. As for me taking the diazepam, I take it for seizures and have never abused it either. It's been a life-saving drug for me and still is. I have gone from having 4-5 seizures a day to just a few a year, but those are almost always provoked by something. My physician and I have discussed me coming off of it and trying to replace it with a different med, but why try to fix something, when it's not broken? And who knows, at this point, especially with me still being in withdrawal, what the implications would be, should I discontinue taking it? In my case, it's just a decision that my physician and I have not come to any definitive conclusions, as of yet. It may be an option, later down the road, for me to try taking something different, but with me still being so symptomatic from withdrawal, at this time, it's certainly a sticky issue. As for the hydrocortisone that I take, it's definitely not a large dose for someone, like me, who has hypoadrenalism. The same can be said for the armour thyroid that I take too. Like a diabetic that needs insulin, I need these hormones, to make up for what my body can no longer create. If I were to discontinue taking them, I would become very ill and at the very worst, could die. If a body, like mine, needs them and can't make them on it's own, you have to get them from somewhere. I really think you should do your homework and think before you speak about these such things to someone, such as myself. The negativity of your reply is quite upsetting and the advice you've given me, should I follow it, could end up causing me more harm than good. If I could change things, I would. The fact is, I can't. I have these issues I must deal with, by taking drugs, that yes, do have side effects, but the alternative of me not taking them is much worse. I'm mature and responsible about anything I do and take, regarding my health. I'm also highly educated, on a collegiate level, regarding healthcare, as well as have learned so much more about numerous healthcare issues, through extensive research on my own, as well as through forums like this. It's so unfortunate that I couldn't predict that I was going to have an adverse reaction to taking an SSRI and end up in protracted withdrawal. I'm sure there are others here that share the same sentiment. It is what it is though and like the rest here, I'm fighting everyday to regain what I've lost. Thankfully, I don't have any mental illnesses, although I do have a few other health issues thrown into the mix, which I have no way of knowing just how much they are affecting my recovery. Just as others have gone before me, I have every reason to believe I, too, shall make a complete recovery, although I may struggle sometimes more than others, if I just keep fighting and give it more time. Patience isn't my strongest characteristic. I'm learning as I go though. Jun-Jul '09 (approx 7 wks) - 5mg/day Lexapro (drug rep samples) given by family dr for long, unended, very stressful divorce Each dose taken makes sicker, think it's just body adjusting, have no clue it's severe adverse reaction at time Aug '09 - pharmacy gets dr rx for, insurance won't pay, I can't afford, dr changes to Celexa, decline to take, cold turkey, necessary blessing in disguise, in hindsight at least Gradually feel some better over 1-2 wks, 3rd wk horrific withdrawal symptoms start & build, see doctor & start researching internet about what's happening, figure it out, 60-70+ severe, frightening, & debilitating symptoms emerge, realize nothing can do to feel better easily or quickly, feel like & think I'm dying, reach point where doctor gets home healthcare & have to call friend to stay with & take care of, friend abandons about 1 yr & lose home healthcare 1st yr symptoms extremely severe, 2nd yr just somewhat better, now into 3rd yr symptoms don't seem much better, still causing horrible suffering, wax & wane in severity, sometimes almost as severe as when started, practically homebound, mostly bedbound, very hard completing simple tasks, symptoms definitely much worse 7-10 days/mo around menstrual cycle Have lost vehicle & home, plus loved cat & dog had for long time, was homeless several months last winter, lived out of car, living in undesirable gov't subsidized housing now causing many troubles, have no medical & very little rx insurance, disability check & food stamps aren't enough to provide basic needs, lack any reliable personal support anymore, very isolated & all alone, have many pressing stressful things must be done, can barely or unable to complete without help don't have, even ones to help situation some, don't even have finances to get urgent necessary needed help required to help situation & self, social services is frequently visiting now, fear being polydrugged, losing everything, put into nursing home, hope & pray someone will help to keep from happening, don't know what else to do, still way to sick to return to work & college, believe I will recover, in the meantime tho have no answers except to plead for help, hope & pray someone, anyone, who truly cares does soon In 32nd mo now still very bad SSRI protracted withdrawal, have only seen few signs of healing since 2nd yr passed, somehow manage to keep fighting, afraid time is running out for best tho & situation only going to get worse trying to survive on own if don't get help from someone This pretty much summarizes what 49 little round white pills (if I recall correctly) have done to my life & future for now, my before & after life are drastically opposite now, both my situation & self, if only I'd known their potential, a little bit too late now tho huh?.?.?...hindsight really is 20/20 isn't it?.?.?... I pray God blesses and helps each and every one of us, here and elsewhere, going through this nightmare. Amen, amen, amen. Link to comment
Christiana Posted July 2, 2013 Author Share Posted July 2, 2013 I agree that the drugs you are taking could have an impact on your recovery, but also it would be unwise to suddenly stop taking any of these substances...especially if you need them for medical reasons. what are they all for honey? are the pain killers for withdrawal pain or for something else? have you tried cutting back on them before? Its a real tricky one, maybe alto or rhi might know a little more and have some suggestions, regarding your painkiller, it seems its a cns depressant (like benzos) now, it could be that its helping your symptoms by keeping the cns sedated, or you could possibly be getting rebound OR as alto has said many times about certain drugs, it could be that they have turned paradoxical on you, here is some info on the painkillers you are on Hydrocodone, like other analgesics, should be administered with caution to patients with head injuries, acute undiagnosed abdominal pain, acute alcoholism, delirium tremens, hypothyroidism, severe renal disease, severe liver disease, pulmonary disease, myxedema (or hypothyroidism), CNS depression, coma, toxic psychosis, Addison's disease, gall bladder disease, prostatic hypertrophy, urethral stricture, kyphoscoliosis, and general debilitation. Hydrocodone should also be administered with caution to patients following gastrointestinal surgery. Hydrocodone, like other narcotic analgesics, may be habit forming. Hydrocodone may impair the mental abilities necessary for potentially hazardous tasks such as driving or operating machinery. The CNS depressant effects of hydrocodone may be increased by other CNS depressants such as alcohol, sedatives, hypnotics, tranquilizers, phenothiazines, and general anesthetics. Read more at http://www.drugs.com/dosage/acetaminophen-hydrocodone.html#VGcXfuy0Qb14Sbov.99 Hi Iggy, I need them for medical reasons, so I can't just stop taking them. The hydrocodone is for my lyme pain. There's really no cutting back on it for me, as I always just take the least amount, as possible, to reduce my pain. I've been taking it, since before I began withdrawal, without any issues and the same remains. Thank you very much for the info about it, which I'm very familiar with! Jun-Jul '09 (approx 7 wks) - 5mg/day Lexapro (drug rep samples) given by family dr for long, unended, very stressful divorce Each dose taken makes sicker, think it's just body adjusting, have no clue it's severe adverse reaction at time Aug '09 - pharmacy gets dr rx for, insurance won't pay, I can't afford, dr changes to Celexa, decline to take, cold turkey, necessary blessing in disguise, in hindsight at least Gradually feel some better over 1-2 wks, 3rd wk horrific withdrawal symptoms start & build, see doctor & start researching internet about what's happening, figure it out, 60-70+ severe, frightening, & debilitating symptoms emerge, realize nothing can do to feel better easily or quickly, feel like & think I'm dying, reach point where doctor gets home healthcare & have to call friend to stay with & take care of, friend abandons about 1 yr & lose home healthcare 1st yr symptoms extremely severe, 2nd yr just somewhat better, now into 3rd yr symptoms don't seem much better, still causing horrible suffering, wax & wane in severity, sometimes almost as severe as when started, practically homebound, mostly bedbound, very hard completing simple tasks, symptoms definitely much worse 7-10 days/mo around menstrual cycle Have lost vehicle & home, plus loved cat & dog had for long time, was homeless several months last winter, lived out of car, living in undesirable gov't subsidized housing now causing many troubles, have no medical & very little rx insurance, disability check & food stamps aren't enough to provide basic needs, lack any reliable personal support anymore, very isolated & all alone, have many pressing stressful things must be done, can barely or unable to complete without help don't have, even ones to help situation some, don't even have finances to get urgent necessary needed help required to help situation & self, social services is frequently visiting now, fear being polydrugged, losing everything, put into nursing home, hope & pray someone will help to keep from happening, don't know what else to do, still way to sick to return to work & college, believe I will recover, in the meantime tho have no answers except to plead for help, hope & pray someone, anyone, who truly cares does soon In 32nd mo now still very bad SSRI protracted withdrawal, have only seen few signs of healing since 2nd yr passed, somehow manage to keep fighting, afraid time is running out for best tho & situation only going to get worse trying to survive on own if don't get help from someone This pretty much summarizes what 49 little round white pills (if I recall correctly) have done to my life & future for now, my before & after life are drastically opposite now, both my situation & self, if only I'd known their potential, a little bit too late now tho huh?.?.?...hindsight really is 20/20 isn't it?.?.?... I pray God blesses and helps each and every one of us, here and elsewhere, going through this nightmare. Amen, amen, amen. Link to comment
Christiana Posted July 2, 2013 Author Share Posted July 2, 2013 did you say you have issues with your liver? also here you say this 10/325 mg hydrocodone/day - I can take 2 every 5 hrs., as needed (a max of 10/day), so my dose isn't consistent - on average, some days I only take 6, whereas other days I take 10 what dose are the pills? I cant see how you could take 325mg perday if your pills are 10mg and you can take a max of 10 per day? surely that would be a max of 100? or do you sometimes take more? Not judging or blaming your meds for this, no way, just want to get as clear a picture as possible, as it could be possible you are having withdrawal from all these substances also....I cut down my cigerettes by half and immediatly felt withdrawal from it, new kinds of headaches and other stuff, when I went back up on my cigerettes, these new symptoms went away, we are so very sensitive to even the smallest changes, you might be better keeping your dose of everything as steady as possible until you are ready to taper? But again I will say I am just speculating, Im no expert but hope that the experts will be along soon to offer more advice Hi Iggy, I took a test once, quite a while ago, which showed I have slowed phase I and II liver detox. I was aggressively treating my lyme back then too though with several antibiotics. When antibiotics kill lyme, it creates toxins, which your body has to rid itself of, so I'm sure my liver was really struggling to keep up with everything, at the time. It might be worth me repeating the test, but it involves ingesting a rather large amount of caffeine, plus I have to pay for it out-of-pocket, as insurance doesn't offer coverage for it. I'm not too sure how well the caffeine would sit with me, as I'm sensitive to stimulants. I must say though, I'm not nearly as sensitive to them, as I was. I'm going to make a note to ask my doctor about what he thinks about repeating the test though, although I'm not sure if the cost would be worth the info I'd get from it. Each pill has 10mg of hydrocodone and 325mg of tylenol. I hope that clarifies things. I think my dose is pretty consistent. Normally, I only take around 6 per day. It's usually, just around the time of my period, when I take a max of 10 per day. I only do it for about 2-3 days max though. I started having a lot of horrible problems with my period increasing my withdrawal symptoms, since I began withdrawal is why. Jun-Jul '09 (approx 7 wks) - 5mg/day Lexapro (drug rep samples) given by family dr for long, unended, very stressful divorce Each dose taken makes sicker, think it's just body adjusting, have no clue it's severe adverse reaction at time Aug '09 - pharmacy gets dr rx for, insurance won't pay, I can't afford, dr changes to Celexa, decline to take, cold turkey, necessary blessing in disguise, in hindsight at least Gradually feel some better over 1-2 wks, 3rd wk horrific withdrawal symptoms start & build, see doctor & start researching internet about what's happening, figure it out, 60-70+ severe, frightening, & debilitating symptoms emerge, realize nothing can do to feel better easily or quickly, feel like & think I'm dying, reach point where doctor gets home healthcare & have to call friend to stay with & take care of, friend abandons about 1 yr & lose home healthcare 1st yr symptoms extremely severe, 2nd yr just somewhat better, now into 3rd yr symptoms don't seem much better, still causing horrible suffering, wax & wane in severity, sometimes almost as severe as when started, practically homebound, mostly bedbound, very hard completing simple tasks, symptoms definitely much worse 7-10 days/mo around menstrual cycle Have lost vehicle & home, plus loved cat & dog had for long time, was homeless several months last winter, lived out of car, living in undesirable gov't subsidized housing now causing many troubles, have no medical & very little rx insurance, disability check & food stamps aren't enough to provide basic needs, lack any reliable personal support anymore, very isolated & all alone, have many pressing stressful things must be done, can barely or unable to complete without help don't have, even ones to help situation some, don't even have finances to get urgent necessary needed help required to help situation & self, social services is frequently visiting now, fear being polydrugged, losing everything, put into nursing home, hope & pray someone will help to keep from happening, don't know what else to do, still way to sick to return to work & college, believe I will recover, in the meantime tho have no answers except to plead for help, hope & pray someone, anyone, who truly cares does soon In 32nd mo now still very bad SSRI protracted withdrawal, have only seen few signs of healing since 2nd yr passed, somehow manage to keep fighting, afraid time is running out for best tho & situation only going to get worse trying to survive on own if don't get help from someone This pretty much summarizes what 49 little round white pills (if I recall correctly) have done to my life & future for now, my before & after life are drastically opposite now, both my situation & self, if only I'd known their potential, a little bit too late now tho huh?.?.?...hindsight really is 20/20 isn't it?.?.?... I pray God blesses and helps each and every one of us, here and elsewhere, going through this nightmare. Amen, amen, amen. Link to comment
Christiana Posted July 3, 2013 Author Share Posted July 3, 2013 I found this article about kefir, which informed me of several things I didn't know about it, thus I found it quite interesting and worthy of posting a link to it here. http://www.orhaolam.com/uploads/KefirInShort.pdf I now know that it has tryptophan in it, as well as B vitamins, among other helpful nutrients. When I reacted poorly to drinking it, for the first time again recently, I think, it was, most likely, the tryptophan, although I can't say for sure. It could have been the B vitamins too. I don't think there's anything in it, besides the tryptophan, which I'm not already ingesting, when I drink Ensure, except maybe I'm just ingesting some additional B vitamins from it. It's worth noting though that I had started my period around the same time I had my reaction to it, which always makes me feel worse for 7-10 days. That's now over with and I'm feeling better for it. How much that played into my reaction to it and me feeling so bad from it though, around that time, I really don't know. I did notice my pain was much better though, as well as my apathy/anhedonia/lack of motivation, once my initial really bad reaction to it wore off a little bit. My reaction to it is now over and my pain is worse, plus I can feel myself starting to slide down back into my apathy/anhedonia/lack of motivation state again. I think it's worth me experimenting with drinking it again a second time though, since I did experience some benefits from drinking it, once my initial really bad reaction to it wore off, except at a much lower dose. About two hours ago, I only took 2 teaspoons of it. Perhaps, when I first drank it, I just drank way too much of it??? So far, my heart isn't pounding, like it did, when I first drank it. I have started to develop a mild feeling of having a lump in my throat now though, which I didn't have, prior to drinking it, but did experience, to a fairly bothersome degree, the first time I drank it. I think, that may just be happening, from the stimulation of me ingesting some additional B vitamins in it though, although I really don't know. Oddly, I have drank it, in the past (about 6 months or so ago, I think), since I've been in withdrawal, and in much larger doses, without having any negative reactions to it, so why it's bothering me to drink it now I have no clue. I have no way of knowing how this will turn out, but time will tell. I'm certainly hoping for the best! Jun-Jul '09 (approx 7 wks) - 5mg/day Lexapro (drug rep samples) given by family dr for long, unended, very stressful divorce Each dose taken makes sicker, think it's just body adjusting, have no clue it's severe adverse reaction at time Aug '09 - pharmacy gets dr rx for, insurance won't pay, I can't afford, dr changes to Celexa, decline to take, cold turkey, necessary blessing in disguise, in hindsight at least Gradually feel some better over 1-2 wks, 3rd wk horrific withdrawal symptoms start & build, see doctor & start researching internet about what's happening, figure it out, 60-70+ severe, frightening, & debilitating symptoms emerge, realize nothing can do to feel better easily or quickly, feel like & think I'm dying, reach point where doctor gets home healthcare & have to call friend to stay with & take care of, friend abandons about 1 yr & lose home healthcare 1st yr symptoms extremely severe, 2nd yr just somewhat better, now into 3rd yr symptoms don't seem much better, still causing horrible suffering, wax & wane in severity, sometimes almost as severe as when started, practically homebound, mostly bedbound, very hard completing simple tasks, symptoms definitely much worse 7-10 days/mo around menstrual cycle Have lost vehicle & home, plus loved cat & dog had for long time, was homeless several months last winter, lived out of car, living in undesirable gov't subsidized housing now causing many troubles, have no medical & very little rx insurance, disability check & food stamps aren't enough to provide basic needs, lack any reliable personal support anymore, very isolated & all alone, have many pressing stressful things must be done, can barely or unable to complete without help don't have, even ones to help situation some, don't even have finances to get urgent necessary needed help required to help situation & self, social services is frequently visiting now, fear being polydrugged, losing everything, put into nursing home, hope & pray someone will help to keep from happening, don't know what else to do, still way to sick to return to work & college, believe I will recover, in the meantime tho have no answers except to plead for help, hope & pray someone, anyone, who truly cares does soon In 32nd mo now still very bad SSRI protracted withdrawal, have only seen few signs of healing since 2nd yr passed, somehow manage to keep fighting, afraid time is running out for best tho & situation only going to get worse trying to survive on own if don't get help from someone This pretty much summarizes what 49 little round white pills (if I recall correctly) have done to my life & future for now, my before & after life are drastically opposite now, both my situation & self, if only I'd known their potential, a little bit too late now tho huh?.?.?...hindsight really is 20/20 isn't it?.?.?... I pray God blesses and helps each and every one of us, here and elsewhere, going through this nightmare. Amen, amen, amen. Link to comment
Administrator Altostrata Posted July 3, 2013 Administrator Share Posted July 3, 2013 Hard to tell. In withdrawal, we sometimes get sensitive to foods. You might want to try re-introducing kefir after a while. This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner. "It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein All postings © copyrighted. Link to comment
Barbarannamated Posted July 3, 2013 Share Posted July 3, 2013 Christiana, I've also dealt with chronic disabling pain from an injury for many years. I agree with and wholeheartedly support your statements about your treatments. Hydrocodone is NOT one of the stronger pain meds and the dosage you're on is relatively low in the context of chronic pain. I have seen many chronic pain patient charts and it is not uncommon to be on multiple opiates plus an SNRI plus Neurontin plus muscle relaxants plus.... Cocktails of 10+ drugs in this patient group is common. If you are stable and pain manageable at your dosage, it sounds like you and your doctor have a good treatment in place. Here are a few real world examples of drug cocktails. Case #215121 is one of the extremes (links are PDF downloads). http://www.prium.net/home/SearchForm/?Search=case+studies&start=0 I wanted to offer my support of your position and explanation. Acute pain conditions and treatnents should never be compared to lifelong chronic conditions. Much love and many hugs, Christiana. B Pristiq tapered over 8 months ending Spring 2011 after 18 years of polydrugging that began w/Zoloft for fatigue/general malaise (not mood). CURRENT: 1mg Klonopin qhs (SSRI bruxism), 75mg trazodone qhs, various hormonesLitigation for 11 years for Work-related injury, settled 2004. Involuntary medical retirement in 2001 (age 39). 2012 - brain MRI showing diffuse, chronic cerebrovascular damage/demyelination possibly vasculitis/cerebritis. Dx w/autoimmune polyendocrine failure.<p>2013 - Dx w/CNS Sjogren's Lupus (FANA antibodies first appeared in 1997 but missed by doc). Link to comment
Christiana Posted July 3, 2013 Author Share Posted July 3, 2013 Hard to tell. In withdrawal, we sometimes get sensitive to foods. You might want to try re-introducing kefir after a while. So far, so good, Alto. I'm counting my blessings! Since my reaction is still fresh in my mind, I'm not getting in any hurry with it. I just keep feeding my mind positive, instead of negative, thoughts and am trying hard to put the questions in the garbage, instead of allowing them to reside inside my head. Jun-Jul '09 (approx 7 wks) - 5mg/day Lexapro (drug rep samples) given by family dr for long, unended, very stressful divorce Each dose taken makes sicker, think it's just body adjusting, have no clue it's severe adverse reaction at time Aug '09 - pharmacy gets dr rx for, insurance won't pay, I can't afford, dr changes to Celexa, decline to take, cold turkey, necessary blessing in disguise, in hindsight at least Gradually feel some better over 1-2 wks, 3rd wk horrific withdrawal symptoms start & build, see doctor & start researching internet about what's happening, figure it out, 60-70+ severe, frightening, & debilitating symptoms emerge, realize nothing can do to feel better easily or quickly, feel like & think I'm dying, reach point where doctor gets home healthcare & have to call friend to stay with & take care of, friend abandons about 1 yr & lose home healthcare 1st yr symptoms extremely severe, 2nd yr just somewhat better, now into 3rd yr symptoms don't seem much better, still causing horrible suffering, wax & wane in severity, sometimes almost as severe as when started, practically homebound, mostly bedbound, very hard completing simple tasks, symptoms definitely much worse 7-10 days/mo around menstrual cycle Have lost vehicle & home, plus loved cat & dog had for long time, was homeless several months last winter, lived out of car, living in undesirable gov't subsidized housing now causing many troubles, have no medical & very little rx insurance, disability check & food stamps aren't enough to provide basic needs, lack any reliable personal support anymore, very isolated & all alone, have many pressing stressful things must be done, can barely or unable to complete without help don't have, even ones to help situation some, don't even have finances to get urgent necessary needed help required to help situation & self, social services is frequently visiting now, fear being polydrugged, losing everything, put into nursing home, hope & pray someone will help to keep from happening, don't know what else to do, still way to sick to return to work & college, believe I will recover, in the meantime tho have no answers except to plead for help, hope & pray someone, anyone, who truly cares does soon In 32nd mo now still very bad SSRI protracted withdrawal, have only seen few signs of healing since 2nd yr passed, somehow manage to keep fighting, afraid time is running out for best tho & situation only going to get worse trying to survive on own if don't get help from someone This pretty much summarizes what 49 little round white pills (if I recall correctly) have done to my life & future for now, my before & after life are drastically opposite now, both my situation & self, if only I'd known their potential, a little bit too late now tho huh?.?.?...hindsight really is 20/20 isn't it?.?.?... I pray God blesses and helps each and every one of us, here and elsewhere, going through this nightmare. Amen, amen, amen. Link to comment
Christiana Posted July 3, 2013 Author Share Posted July 3, 2013 Christiana,I've also dealt with chronic disabling pain from an injury for many years. I agree with and wholeheartedly support your statements about your treatments. Hydrocodone is NOT one of the stronger pain meds and the dosage you're on is relatively low in the context of chronic pain. I have seen many chronic pain patient charts and it is not uncommon to be on multiple opiates plus an SNRI plus Neurontin plus muscle relaxants plus....Cocktails of 10+ drugs in this patient group is common. If you are stable and pain manageable at your dosage, it sounds like you and your doctor have a good treatment in place.Here are a few real world examples of drug cocktails. Case #215121 is one of the extremes (links are PDF downloads).http://www.prium.net/home/SearchForm/?Search=case+studies&start=0I wanted to offer my support of your position and explanation. Acute pain conditions and treatnents should never be compared to lifelong chronic conditions.Much love and many hugs, Christiana.B Hi Barb, I'm so sorry to hear of your struggles with pain also! Chronic pain can certainly wear a person down fast! How is your pain now? What are you doing or taking for it, if anything? Thank you very much for the examples! It's absolutely absurd what even pain doctors will do to harm their patients! Most of all, I thank you so much for your support, about my situation! Just like SSRI withdrawal, if someone has never experienced severe, chronic pain, they have no idea just how bad it can be! Lots of love and hugs to you too!!! I noticed, in your signature, you have polyendocrine failure. If you don't mind, would you care to elaborate on that? I've been dealing with endocrine problems for so long and have learned a lot. Perhaps I can be of some help to you, in that regard? Jun-Jul '09 (approx 7 wks) - 5mg/day Lexapro (drug rep samples) given by family dr for long, unended, very stressful divorce Each dose taken makes sicker, think it's just body adjusting, have no clue it's severe adverse reaction at time Aug '09 - pharmacy gets dr rx for, insurance won't pay, I can't afford, dr changes to Celexa, decline to take, cold turkey, necessary blessing in disguise, in hindsight at least Gradually feel some better over 1-2 wks, 3rd wk horrific withdrawal symptoms start & build, see doctor & start researching internet about what's happening, figure it out, 60-70+ severe, frightening, & debilitating symptoms emerge, realize nothing can do to feel better easily or quickly, feel like & think I'm dying, reach point where doctor gets home healthcare & have to call friend to stay with & take care of, friend abandons about 1 yr & lose home healthcare 1st yr symptoms extremely severe, 2nd yr just somewhat better, now into 3rd yr symptoms don't seem much better, still causing horrible suffering, wax & wane in severity, sometimes almost as severe as when started, practically homebound, mostly bedbound, very hard completing simple tasks, symptoms definitely much worse 7-10 days/mo around menstrual cycle Have lost vehicle & home, plus loved cat & dog had for long time, was homeless several months last winter, lived out of car, living in undesirable gov't subsidized housing now causing many troubles, have no medical & very little rx insurance, disability check & food stamps aren't enough to provide basic needs, lack any reliable personal support anymore, very isolated & all alone, have many pressing stressful things must be done, can barely or unable to complete without help don't have, even ones to help situation some, don't even have finances to get urgent necessary needed help required to help situation & self, social services is frequently visiting now, fear being polydrugged, losing everything, put into nursing home, hope & pray someone will help to keep from happening, don't know what else to do, still way to sick to return to work & college, believe I will recover, in the meantime tho have no answers except to plead for help, hope & pray someone, anyone, who truly cares does soon In 32nd mo now still very bad SSRI protracted withdrawal, have only seen few signs of healing since 2nd yr passed, somehow manage to keep fighting, afraid time is running out for best tho & situation only going to get worse trying to survive on own if don't get help from someone This pretty much summarizes what 49 little round white pills (if I recall correctly) have done to my life & future for now, my before & after life are drastically opposite now, both my situation & self, if only I'd known their potential, a little bit too late now tho huh?.?.?...hindsight really is 20/20 isn't it?.?.?... I pray God blesses and helps each and every one of us, here and elsewhere, going through this nightmare. Amen, amen, amen. Link to comment
Christiana Posted July 4, 2013 Author Share Posted July 4, 2013 I'm so happy to be able to write this... Suddenly, I've had quite a bit of a lessening in my withdrawal symptoms and am feeling better, than I can remember, in over 4 years now!!! I'm still having symptoms, yes, but they have lightened up to a more comfortable level right now!!! Over the past month, the only things that have been different are... I didn't have my period in May, but it came back in June really bad, like it always does, since I've been in withdrawal. I suffered a lot for about 10 days, which isn't out of the ordinary, then I felt a tiny bit better, like I always do. A few weeks ago, for several days, I consumed quite a bit of kefir and suffered bad from it for about a week. It happened around the same time I started my period, so I'm estimating it was about a week, as it's really hard for me to separate the two. When it went away, I felt a little bit better though. I've consumed it, in the past, since I've been in withdrawal, without it making me so sick, so why it made me so sick then, I don't really know. Yesterday, I consumed some more kefir, but in a much lower quantity than I did a few weeks ago. I only took 2 teaspoons. I also took the same amount today. So far, it's not making me sick right now, although I don't know why, except maybe I just ingested way too much of it a few weeks ago. If you read a little further up my thread, you'll see that I've wrote more about my experience with ingesting kefir recently, including how I've felt after not consuming any of it for awhile. It's been a long, very difficult 4 years for me, without a doubt. I really don't know what else to say, except, hopefully, I'm finally turning the corner and going to start having some true windows now!!! I really don't know what to do either, except I'm definitely going to soak up as much of this lessening of the intensity of my symptoms for as long as I can and enjoy it!!! Right now, there's no denying, something is different with me and I've actually changed, for the better, for once!!! Thank you, Jesus!!!!!!!!!! Jun-Jul '09 (approx 7 wks) - 5mg/day Lexapro (drug rep samples) given by family dr for long, unended, very stressful divorce Each dose taken makes sicker, think it's just body adjusting, have no clue it's severe adverse reaction at time Aug '09 - pharmacy gets dr rx for, insurance won't pay, I can't afford, dr changes to Celexa, decline to take, cold turkey, necessary blessing in disguise, in hindsight at least Gradually feel some better over 1-2 wks, 3rd wk horrific withdrawal symptoms start & build, see doctor & start researching internet about what's happening, figure it out, 60-70+ severe, frightening, & debilitating symptoms emerge, realize nothing can do to feel better easily or quickly, feel like & think I'm dying, reach point where doctor gets home healthcare & have to call friend to stay with & take care of, friend abandons about 1 yr & lose home healthcare 1st yr symptoms extremely severe, 2nd yr just somewhat better, now into 3rd yr symptoms don't seem much better, still causing horrible suffering, wax & wane in severity, sometimes almost as severe as when started, practically homebound, mostly bedbound, very hard completing simple tasks, symptoms definitely much worse 7-10 days/mo around menstrual cycle Have lost vehicle & home, plus loved cat & dog had for long time, was homeless several months last winter, lived out of car, living in undesirable gov't subsidized housing now causing many troubles, have no medical & very little rx insurance, disability check & food stamps aren't enough to provide basic needs, lack any reliable personal support anymore, very isolated & all alone, have many pressing stressful things must be done, can barely or unable to complete without help don't have, even ones to help situation some, don't even have finances to get urgent necessary needed help required to help situation & self, social services is frequently visiting now, fear being polydrugged, losing everything, put into nursing home, hope & pray someone will help to keep from happening, don't know what else to do, still way to sick to return to work & college, believe I will recover, in the meantime tho have no answers except to plead for help, hope & pray someone, anyone, who truly cares does soon In 32nd mo now still very bad SSRI protracted withdrawal, have only seen few signs of healing since 2nd yr passed, somehow manage to keep fighting, afraid time is running out for best tho & situation only going to get worse trying to survive on own if don't get help from someone This pretty much summarizes what 49 little round white pills (if I recall correctly) have done to my life & future for now, my before & after life are drastically opposite now, both my situation & self, if only I'd known their potential, a little bit too late now tho huh?.?.?...hindsight really is 20/20 isn't it?.?.?... I pray God blesses and helps each and every one of us, here and elsewhere, going through this nightmare. Amen, amen, amen. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Narcissus Posted July 4, 2013 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted July 4, 2013 That's great to hear Christiana. I hope that you're enjoying this new window. It's a glimpse of things to come I'm sure. 3 Years 150 mgs Effexor 2 month taper down to zero 3 terrible weeks at zero Back up to 75 mgs 2 months at 75 6 or so months back to regular dose of 150 - was able to restabilize fine. 3 month taper back to zero 1 HORRENDOUS week at zero 2 days back up to 37.5 3 days back up to 75 One week at 150 - unable to stabilize. Back down to 75 mgs At 75 mgs (half original dose) and suffering withdrawal symptoms since October 2012. "It is a radical cure for all pessimism to become ill, to remain ill for a good while, and then grow well for a still longer period." - Nietzsche Link to comment
UnfoldingSky Posted July 4, 2013 Share Posted July 4, 2013 Hi Christiana, so glad to hear you have had an improvement. Here's hoping things continue like this for you! US I am not a medical professional and nothing I say is a medical opinion or meant to be medical advice, please seek a competent and trusted medical professional to consult for all medical decisions. Link to comment
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now