fairweather: at my wits end

[fairweather]

Female 56 years old, was on citalopram for about 10 years, (20 mg), over 8 month period weaned my self off medication.  First month no symptoms, followed by crying spells, then becoming angry for the slightest reason.  Then improves.... Mentally have never felt better, more alert, more energy, no more brain fog, forgetting words in mid speech.  Felt great.  But 2 month ago started with the most terrible stomach pains, intense pain after eating, bloating and my guts seem to be working overtime...extreme gurgling, and burping.  I have lost 15 pounds in 2 months because of fear of eating.   Never had any problems in my life, and then found this forum that suggests that withdrawal could be a reason.   Have had  colonoscopy and camera to look at stomach.....all clear.  Doctor suggested IBS, and suggested notriptyline at the lowest dose.  Took it for a few days, but just sedated me, so have stopped.  Trying foodmap diet...no effect at the moment.   Having a CT scan, I am terrified as to what this, and am contemplating resuming the citalopram tablets.  I'm desperate, mental health fine, but obviously losing this much weight would worry anyone.  I'm also worried about my partner how he is dealing with this..he is strong person, but its upsetting for him to see me in such pain.  Anyone able to give me advice please, I need to get out of this nightmare.

 

Edited March 22, 2019 by fairweather
more info added

[ChessieCat]

Hi fairweather and welcome to SA,

 

It definitely sounds like you are experiencing withdrawal symptoms from tapering too quickly and/or jumping off from too high a dose.  An SA taper off 10mg would take about 30 months.

 

SA recommends tapering by no more than 10% of the current dose followed by a hold of about 4 weeks to allow the brain to adapt to not getting as much of the drug.  Why taper by 10% of my dosage?

 

When we taper using this protocol we may experience mild withdrawal symptoms.  However when the drug is taken away too quickly we can get withdrawal symptoms which are more than mild:  Dr Joseph Glenmullen's Withdrawal Symptoms

 

The only known way to reduce withdrawal symptoms is to take the drug that our brain has adapted to.  If you would like to try reinstatement please let us know and we can suggest a dose.  Please note that SA recommends starting with a small amount of the drug and increasing by a small amount if needed.  If you take too much drug after experiencing withdrawal symptoms it can make things worse.  Please read Post #1 of this topic and let us know if you would like to reinstate:  About reinstating and stabilizing to reduce withdrawal symptoms

 

Please do not go back on the last dose you were taking.  It will be too much.

 

This topic explains how to get the dose you need.  Tips for tapering off Celexa (citalopram)

 

Tapering Calculator - Online

 

 

Please create your drug signature using the following format.   Keep it simple.  NO diagnoses or symptoms please - thank you.

• details for last 2 years - dates, ALL drugs, doses
• summary for older than 2 years - just years and drug/s

Account Settings – Create or Edit a signature

 

 

This is your own introductions topic where your can ask questions about your own situation and journal your progress.

[ChessieCat]

Here's some additional information which might help you to understand what is happening:

 

Recovery isn't linear it happens in a Windows and Waves Pattern

 

Withdrawal Normal Description

When we take a psychiatric drug, we are adding chemical/s to the brain.  The brain then has to change to adapt to getting the chemical/s.  It might have to change something to do with A and then once that change has been made it affects B so another change has to be made and so on down the line.  It is a chain reaction, a domino effect.

 

The same thing happens when we take the drug away.  That's why it's possible to experience such a vast array of withdrawal symptoms, and they can change, and be of different intensity.

 

are-we-there-yet-how-long-is-withdrawal-going-to-take

 

These explain it really well:

 

Video:  Healing From Antidepressants - Patterns of Recovery

 

On 8/31/2011 at 5:28 AM, Rhiannon said:

When we stop taking the drug, we have a brain that has designed itself so that it works in the presence of the drug; now it can't work properly without the drug because it's designed itself so that the drug is part of its chemistry and structure. It's like a plant that has grown on a trellis; you can't just yank out the trellis and expect the plant to be okay. When the drug is removed, the remodeling process has to take place in reverse. SO--it's not a matter of just getting the drug out of your system and moving on. If it were that simple, none of us would be here. It's a matter of, as I describe it, having to grow a new brain. I believe this growing-a-new-brain happens throughout the taper process if the taper is slow enough. (If it's too fast, then there's not a lot of time for actually rebalancing things, and basically the brain is just pedaling fast trying to keep us alive.) It also continues to happen, probably for longer than the symptoms actually last, throughout the time of recovery after we are completely off the drug, which is why recovery takes so long.

 

AND

 

On 12/4/2015 at 2:41 AM, apace41 said:

Basically- you have a building where the MAJOR steel structures are trying to be rebuilt at different times - ALL while people are coming and going in the building and attempting to work.

It would be like if the World Trade Center Towers hadn't completely fallen - but had crumbled inside in different places.. Imagine if you were trying to rebuild the tower - WHILE people were coming and going and trying to work in the building!  You'd have to set up a temporary elevator - but when you needed to fix part of that area, you'd have to tear down that elevator and set up a temporary elevator somewhere else. And so on. You'd have to build, work around, then tear down, then build again, then work around, then build... ALL while people are coming and going, ALL while the furniture is being replaced, ALL while the walls are getting repainted... ALL while life is going on INSIDE the building. No doubt it would be chaotic. That is EXACTLY what is happening with windows and waves.  The windows are where the body has "got it right" for a day or so - but then the building shifts and the brain works on something else - and it's chaos again while another temporary pathway is set up to reroute function until repairs are made.  

 

[fairweather]

Thanks for the information, chessiecat.  So realistically it should take  years, not months to come off this drug.   I've been really stupid coming off this fast, I merely thought the drug was effecting my brain, not the whole of my body.....then to learn that most of the serotonin is produced in your gut.     I have read that reinstatement may not work, but can you advise which dose would be best to start off at? 

.

[ChessieCat]

Before we can suggest a dose to reinstate we need to know when you last took citalopram and the dose.

 

We also need to know the dates and doses of your reductions.

 

Q:  Did you every skip days to taper?  If yes, please provide the details.

 

 

Also, please create your drug signature using the following format.   Keep it simple.  NO diagnoses or symptoms please - thank you.

• details for last 2 years - dates, ALL drugs, doses
• summary for older than 2 years - just years and drug/s

Account Settings – Create or Edit a signature

 

[fairweather]

Started weaning myself of citalopram in February 2018, started at the dose 10mg, then in July 2018 dropped to 5g.  In September 2018 came off citalopram completely.   Sorry I can't remember the exact dates, never missed any doses.

 

[ChessieCat]

Unfortunately have have reduced you drug too quickly and jumped off at 5mg, which is classed as a cold turkey.

 

What you are experiencing are withdrawal symptoms.  I suggest your read this:  CT and Fast Tapers

 

At 6 or 7 months since your last dose we don't know if reinstating would help.  If you would like to try reinstatement then it would be best to start with a very small test dose to see how you it affects you.  You could try 0.25mg to start and if things didn't get worse you could increase by a tiny bit more (total dose 0.5mg).  You might find that it is enough to take the edge off your withdrawal symptoms.

 

It takes about 4 days for a dose to get to full level in the blood and a bit longer for it to register in the brain.  It is best to keep daily notes on paper of what symptoms worsen or improve so you can see how the reinstatement is affecting your symptoms.

 

Please make sure that you carefully read Post #1 of this topic:  About reinstating and stabilizing to reduce withdrawal symptoms

 

Please let us know what you decide to do and how you are going.

[fairweather]

Thanks, I have decided to reinstate beginning at 0.25g. I will keep you informed of my progress.

 

[fairweather]

1 hour ago, fairweather said:

Thanks, I have decided to reinstate beginning at 0.25mg. I will keep you informed of my progress.

 

 

[fairweather]

Hi, trying to measure 0.25mg was a nightmare, bought the wrong scales that didn't even register that weight.  So took a gamble and reinstated at 1.25mg.   Felt better, happier in my self, able to cope with the numerous tests to find out the problems I was having with my stomach.  Lost 30 pounds, but weight stabilised although still in pain, but manageable.  I had a masectomy a year and a half ago  with very little pain, but after stopping citalopram, I developed pain around the masectomy site, rib cage, shoulder blades, which disappeared when I reinstated.   Still waiting for the results of a small camera I had to swallow which basically takes lots of photos of your small intestine.   A week and a half ago I decided to updose at 2.5mg  …..no problems, but 2 days ago I became agitated, unable to settle, crying, sweating...never experience this before   Now I am getting waves where I feel better for a very short time, followed by  longer spells of agitation. Should I start taking the 1.25mg again, or stop taking the drug temporarily so it has time to leave my system,(maybe for 36 hours when apparently 50 percent of the drug is cleared from your body... or does it just not work that way😏), and then start back on the 1.25mg.  Or just hope it gets better.....