Suicidal thoughts are treated like a crime: that’s why people don’t seek help.

[GiaK]

latest post responding to the media going crazy with misinformation due to the two recent highly visible celebrity suicides.  

 

Suicidal thoughts are treated like a crime: that’s why people don’t seek help. – Everything Matters: Beyond Meds 

[Barbarannamated]

That exact thing happened to me.  

 

It was early 2000s while in the depths of a 10 year work comp lawsuit for a neck injury that I later learned was caused, at least in part, by a neuromuscular reaction to Zoloft (rhabdomyolysis and also dystonias).  

 

I had a good, years long relationship with my pain doctor.  At an appointment, I was honest in checking off a box that I did not feel ok psychologically, knowing that it would spark a needed conversation. I never mentioned suicide or anything to that effect. 

 

Rather than ANY DISCUSSION, he dialed a code and within minutes, I was being handcuffed and taken away, through the waiting room, by the police.  They kept explaining that I was not being arrested, but the handcuffs were a safety precaution. It took them several hours to get me to a psych facility where I was held.  Fortunately, the psychiatrist on duty was one of my clients and a very good man.  He did not drug me, but encouraged me to stay strong through the work comp nightmare because they do everything to break people down. 

 

I have terrible flashbacks of this.  I have to go to a new pain doc this week and the PTSD is horrible.  

 

Thank you for this post, Gia.  

[powerback]

“Exactly. My sister told her GP she felt suicidal. The police took her away in hand cuffs.”

This is awful .

In my opinion the ignorance around mental health and suffering is the ultimate taboo .I could cry with the thoughts of this happening to a person .imagine the difference if a this person was comforted and hugged and said everything will be ok .we need to get a database in correlation with MIA that shows compassionate therapists and trust and understanding .we need to look out for the next generation .

I think back to what my GP wrote on a letter to a doctor in a psychiatric hospital he was sending me too when I was at the height of loosing my mind with withdrawl ,thanks to him saying halving my dose would be fine  ,it was so simple and easy for him to pass me on to the next person and then he can sit back and take some validation for me getting the " help " I needed. but to he's credit he left the letter with me and didn't demand I go . this letter will be forever with me to keep me on my path for healing .

We need to focus on the next generation of doctors and therapist that are showing signs and signal's of change of behaviour and compassion to fellow human beings .but it will be very hard in todays world because everything is money and its getting worse. the arrogance of the western world and capitalism  is disgusting and causing the mental illness . 

 

[GiaK]

horrifying Barbara...it's mind-blowing how grossly counter-intuitive it is to treat people like that when they're needy and vulnerable and yet it still happens all the time. 

 

and yes,  powerback...the younger generations allow for hope for change, but I sometimes think at this point that we have to build outside the system...new infrastructures of care and support....leave the system and create something else altogether....

[GiaK]

This is a new companion piece:  When suicide ceases to be taboo there will be less suicide – Everything Matters: Beyond Meds

 

Everyone should have a safe place for this deep work and thus not make the choice prematurely in despair.

We have a lot of work to do as a society before that will be possible. Until then I hold those who suicide in my heart with deep love and compassion.

https://beyondmeds.com/2018/06/19/when-suicide/  

[Barbarannamated]

Thank you, Gia. 

 

Another excellent piece.  

[ChessieCat]

When I was seeing a psychologist several years ago I mentioned to her that I was having suicidal thoughts but told her that I didn't want it recorded in her notes.  I had a fear that being written down it could be used against me in the future. 

[manymoretodays]

On 6/19/2018 at 12:35 PM, GiaK said:

but I sometimes think at this point that we have to build outside the system...new infrastructures of care and support....leave the system and create something else altogether....

 

I agree.  Yet sometimes it feels kind of "pie in the sky" to me.   I wish I had the money AND man/women power.  I kibbitz in "the system" a bit.........just to have a voice when I can, and for that just in case.........something alternative starts up around here.  Nobody has been successful so far in getting a grant AND approval from the division of Mental Health and Substance Use and starting something more alternative.  Fully peer run.  They burn out.  Not enough man/women power or funding probably to pay many for their time.  I was involved in one.  A volunteer of course.    Another was going to get going and the main organizer quit.  It's pretty hard to do with system approval and then do the preliminaries........which aren't too bad.......mission statements and who will be served and yada yada.  But you don't want to step on any agencies toes.  You have to do something that no one in "the system" thinks that they are doing.    And..........I don't know how else anyone could get a grant or funding........at least around here..........and trained peers........enough of them.......  I mean I guess if I don't/can't have the solution....... that sometimes for me anyway........it's best to stop complaining and just give input when I can to system people and other peers who might mobilize some day.  We all kind of tip toe around a lot!!!

 

My own experience with ideation and a call to a hotline resulted in 2 police cars coming to my home..........they said on the phone that they would take me to the horsespittal.  I was fine with that.......I needed respite badly.    I had to walk on out finally and say........"hey, are you here for me?" as they were  "casing" the neighborhood.......pretty embarrassing.  I mean I HAVE to laugh now........my state of mind was pretty darn scrambled........and of course.......no where to go for relief/respite around here except the hospital.

 

 I saw one of the police officers about a year later and thanked him.  The woman officer even allowed me to go to the bathroom while they hovered in my home with the door shut.  Small favors I guess.

 

Well.......guess what.  They did not take me to the hospital.

 

My hubs at the time and young son/SUN were out.  I had called my psychiatric NP who said I did not need hospitalization.  I must have been on a medication switch after rapid W/D of another........or having a paradoxical reaction or something...........of course none of the professionals ever consider that.

 

I called a neighbor and promised to go to the horsespittal and they left.  I did go too.  Voluntary.  One of 5 times in my psychiatric career that spanned 30 years and that many medications.  The first time was shortly after starting taking A/D's and was like a country club.......seriously.  Seriously.......late 1980's or early 90's.   We did wall climbing, crafts, and got to go outside a lot.  Then 3 more after I got more medication and diagnonsense........all voluntary.  The final one was almost 4 years ago now........when I came down too quickly off Lexapro/escitalopram and had also switched right to the liquid from with no cross over.  I didn't know better.  They/the horspittalizations got less like a country club in the later years........as of course the rates of mental health aberrations are sky rocketing now with the overdiagnosing/ overmedication of the masses.  Oh and the children involved.  Lord save the children!  It's horrible.  Ugh.

 

I was a professional though......in graduate school with that first hospitalization.  And still have the R.N., M.S.N. after my name.  Middle class.  Sadly.......it makes a difference in how one is treated in "the system" and what hospital you can go to........and all that.  In the U.S. anyway.  I want to help those who don't have the "priviledge" or education too.  How do we do that?

 

So.......nice to put those yucky memories in print.  I don't think any background searches in the U.S. come up with my hospitalizations.  Or that I am targeted in any way due to them.  I haven't been able to get a diagnosis of "iatrogenic" disability or better stated challenges or limitations.........but that's okay with me.  I'm happy to be medication free and most who know me know I am not a threat or harm or dangerous or even "crazy mad" or something.  I can't do my career anymore either.........and that's okay as well.

 

Happy and proud to be part of the slow change in the mental health/illness paradigm.  There's improvement happening all the time.

 

Love, peace, healing, and growth,

Thanks for the space.

mmt

Edited June 23, 2018 by manymoretodays

[FarmGirlWorks]

Thanks for writing about that, @manymoretodays... it is hopeful to see that your situation  and suicidality changed. It is hard to believe that it does change when one is in the thick of it but the evidence is all around that it does.

 

Got this in my email today  and it was good timing. I think she is right on about holding the space for a person and letting them know that they are capable of transformation and change will happen.

 

http://kellybroganmd.com/how-to-help-someone-who-is-suicidal/?utm_source=Kelly+Brogan+MD+Newsletter&utm_campaign=7d008adfa3-How+to+Help+Someone+Who+is+Suicidal&utm_medium=email&utm_term=0_d0f977a8c5-7d008adfa3-124047533

[wantrelief]

Thank you for sharing this @FarmGirlWorks.