MichaelP1991 Posted September 24, 2018 Share Posted September 24, 2018 (edited) I was misdiagnosed by stupid non human doctor with psychosis (i was depressed after quiting amphetamin) and forced to take olanzapine 5 mg in the morning and evening for 5 days I felt terribly bad taking her so I decided to go cold turkey and went into the big depression and then I attempted a suicide attempt, I went to the hospital where for 2.5 weeks I was given ketrel and seroquel after i went off the hospital and cold turkey again beacuse and fell terrible on this med and they were not for me because im 100% sure i was misdiagnosad, now I have a severe withdrawal effect for a month, I have no thoughts, I am not happy , I have zero emotions, I can only cry over my condition and what they have than to me, I am very afraid that permanent changes have occurred in my brain, I would like to know whether it will pass and whether my brain has not been damaged forever? Edited October 1, 2018 by MichaelP1991 formatted text All drugs in 2018 22 June - 27 June Ranofren (Olanzapine) 5mg at night and 5 mg at the morning stopped suddenly get in major depression 9 August - 28 August Ketrel 25 mg per day Rispolept 5 mg per day and Depakine all stopped suddenly at 29 August 1 September - to this day Hydroxyzine for a sleep 50 mg Link to comment
MichaelP1991 Posted September 24, 2018 Author Share Posted September 24, 2018 (edited) Oh i dont say hello , so hello to everyone and this beatufiul site . Please help me with my withdrawal symtomps , they are terrible , the worst are that i dont have any thoughts , my mind was blank and im afraid that is permanent ... Edited September 24, 2018 by MichaelP1991 formatted All drugs in 2018 22 June - 27 June Ranofren (Olanzapine) 5mg at night and 5 mg at the morning stopped suddenly get in major depression 9 August - 28 August Ketrel 25 mg per day Rispolept 5 mg per day and Depakine all stopped suddenly at 29 August 1 September - to this day Hydroxyzine for a sleep 50 mg Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus SkyBlue Posted September 27, 2018 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted September 27, 2018 Hello and welcome to SA. While we are waiting for your screen name to be changed, I can share a bit of info, etc. First of all, your brain is not permanently damaged. It sounds like you have been through a lot, but you will heal. That is what this forum is all about. Please read about the waves and windows pattern of healing here: https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/82-the-windows-and-waves-pattern-of-stabilization/ To help us out, please create a signature using these instructions: https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/18343-please-put-your-withdrawal-history-in-your-signature/ When we know a bit more about your particular situation (length of time on the drugs and how recently changes were made), we can help more. Again, welcome. 2020: After 18+ years (entire adult life) on Paxil, a dangerous doctor-led "taper" in 2015, and four years tapering off the last 1 mg thanks to SA and the Brassmonkey slide, I AM COMPLETELY FREE OF PAXIL! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! Forever. 2021: Began conservative, proper, CNS-respecting taper of Zoloft, led by the only expert on me -- me. Making own liquid. 5-10% plus holds. 2022: Holding on Zoloft for now. Current dose 47 mg. Hanging in, hanging on. Severe protracted PAWS, windows and waves. While I may not be doing "a lot" by outside standards, things are graaaaadually getting better. Yoga (gentle to medium); walks; daily breath practice; nutrition, fruits/veg; nature; water; EastEnders (lol); practicing self-compassion, self-care; boundaries; connection; allowing feelings; t r u s t ing that I, too, will heal. (--> may need to be reminded of this.) "You are not alone, and this is not the end of your story." - Baylissa Link to comment
MichaelP1991 Posted September 28, 2018 Author Share Posted September 28, 2018 Ok i wilk write my signature today and read about three waves and patterns , its hard to do beacause my memory was very very bad but i will try to remember and understand . Thanks All drugs in 2018 22 June - 27 June Ranofren (Olanzapine) 5mg at night and 5 mg at the morning stopped suddenly get in major depression 9 August - 28 August Ketrel 25 mg per day Rispolept 5 mg per day and Depakine all stopped suddenly at 29 August 1 September - to this day Hydroxyzine for a sleep 50 mg Link to comment
MichaelP1991 Posted September 28, 2018 Author Share Posted September 28, 2018 (edited) I try to tell my story , I had a hard ride after using amphetamine, im really depressed for about 3 days after use it and the only thing I needed was the rest. In the 3rd day I felt a little better and I knew that the next day will be ok, but my mother was very scared with my condition and forced led me to the psychiatrist, I did not want to talk to him, my mother talked to him about the fact that I took amphetamine and I felt bad, and he said that "ha gave me Ranofren (olanzapine) in case of it! as if it was a psychosis" but I did not have one symptom of psychosis, I had no delusions, hallucinations, no paranoia, I was totally in touch with reality for these 3 days, I only had severe depression. I do not know how it's possible that he gave me that strong pills without even talking to me! It's a bad diagnosis. I did not want to take these drugs and slept the night, in the morning I felt quite well, depression went away but my mother did not reach anything, did not listen to me said that the doctor gave drugs I have to take them and force me to take them for 5 days. Already after the first tablet I felt terribly tired, I could barely walk, others only worsened the matter, after a few days I stopped thinking, I stopped the internal dialogue, I only felt tiredness. After 5 days, I managed to persuade my mother not to give me more of this drug, I thought that after the withdrawal symptoms pass but it was only worse, new symptoms came, I awoke in the morning in panic and got the worst depression in my life. I felt so bad that after a few weeks I had a suicide attempt, they took me to a psychiatric hospital for observation. Unfortunately for me in this hospital the head was the psychiatrist who misdiagnosed me and said that after the drugs I could not get depression and that it was probably psychosis, I could not believe it. They gave me Ketrel and Rispolept and Depakine, of course I can not refuse to take them. For 2.5 weeks I walked like a zombie, I could not think completely, but I wanted to get out of this hospital so badly that everything is ok. They released me almost after 3 weeks, after leaving I stopped taking drugs because I knew how they hurt me. I did not know anything about the fact that you can not leave suddenly , now for a month I have side effects, I have muscle pains in my right arm, I am still tired, I have no feelings, I can only cry over my condition, I have sleep problems and had major anhedonia, and worst of all I can not think completely, I do not have imagination, I do not lead an internal dialogue, my vocabulary has decreased almost to zero, 2 sentences, 3 sentences it all I can say in one breath I have it since Olanzapine, before I was really an intelligent man and you could talk to me about any topic, now I feel as if I had gone through a chemical lobotome. This is horrible. For a month, in addition to work, I do not do anything but read various articles on the Internet that talk about irreversible brain changes after neuroleptics and I am really scared that I will be restrained by the end of my life. Also Since I took olanzapine I have a permanent anisocoria, my right pupil is clearly bigger than the other, im really afraid that these drugs have caused some kind of allergic reaction to my nervous system that's why this pupil is bigger. I found this forum and I am counting on any support because I am very lonely with this problem, my family does not believe that it is medication, psichiatrists say that it is impossible that side effects would persist, ******* ignorants, in Poland they are only to prescribe medicines they have little knowledge and have not even warned me about side effects. Sorry for my English Edited October 1, 2018 by MichaelP1991 removed text from quote All drugs in 2018 22 June - 27 June Ranofren (Olanzapine) 5mg at night and 5 mg at the morning stopped suddenly get in major depression 9 August - 28 August Ketrel 25 mg per day Rispolept 5 mg per day and Depakine all stopped suddenly at 29 August 1 September - to this day Hydroxyzine for a sleep 50 mg Link to comment
MichaelP1991 Posted October 2, 2018 Author Share Posted October 2, 2018 Hello everyone , my name is Michael , i tried to tell you my story , this is my story ... I had a hard ride after using amphetamine, im really depressed for about 3 days after use it and the only thing I needed was the rest. In the 3rd day I felt a little better and I knew that the next day will be ok, but my mother was very scared with my condition and forced led me to the psychiatrist, I did not want to talk to him, my mother talked to him about the fact that I took amphetamine and I felt bad, and he said that "ha gave me Ranofren (olanzapine) in case of it! as if it was a psychosis" but I did not have one symptom of psychosis, I had no delusions, hallucinations, no paranoia, I was totally in touch with reality for these 3 days, I only had severe depression. I do not know how it's possible that he gave me that strong pills without even talking to me! It's a bad diagnosis. I did not want to take these drugs and slept the night, in the morning I felt quite well, depression went away but my mother did not reach anything, did not listen to me said that the doctor gave drugs I have to take them and force me to take them for 5 days. Already after the first tablet I felt terribly tired, I could barely walk, others only worsened the matter, after a few days I stopped thinking, I stopped the internal dialogue, I only felt tiredness. After 5 days, I managed to persuade my mother not to give me more of this drug, I thought that after the withdrawal symptoms pass but it was only worse, new symptoms came, I awoke in the morning in panic and got the worst depression in my life. I felt so bad that after a few weeks I had a suicide attempt, they took me to a psychiatric hospital for observation. Unfortunately for me in this hospital the head was the psychiatrist who misdiagnosed me and said that after the drugs I could not get depression and that it was probably psychosis, I could not believe it. They gave me Ketrel and Rispolept and Depakine, of course I can not refuse to take them. For 2.5 weeks I walked like a zombie, I could not think completely, but I wanted to get out of this hospital so badly that everything is ok. They released me almost after 3 weeks, after leaving I stopped taking drugs because I knew how they hurt me. I did not know anything about the fact that you can not leave suddenly , now for a month I have side effects, I have muscle pains in my right arm, I am still tired, I have no feelings, I can only cry over my condition, I have sleep problems and had major anhedonia, and worst of all I can not think completely, I do not have imagination, I do not lead an internal dialogue, my vocabulary has decreased almost to zero, 2 sentences, 3 sentences it all I can say in one breath I have it since Olanzapine, before I was really an intelligent man and you could talk to me about any topic, now I feel as if I had gone through a chemical lobotome. This is horrible. For a month, in addition to work, I do not do anything but read various articles on the Internet that talk about irreversible brain changes after neuroleptics and I am really scared that I will be restrained by the end of my life. Also Since I took olanzapine I have a permanent anisocoria, my right pupil is clearly bigger than the other, im really afraid that these drugs have caused some kind of allergic reaction to my nervous system that's why this pupil is bigger. I found this forum and I am counting on any support because I am very lonely with this problem, my family does not believe that it is medication, psichiatrists say that it is impossible that side effects would persist, ******* ignorants, in Poland they are only to prescribe medicines they have little knowledge and have not even warned me about side effects. All drugs in 2018 22 June - 27 June Ranofren (Olanzapine) 5mg at night and 5 mg at the morning stopped suddenly get in major depression 9 August - 28 August Ketrel 25 mg per day Rispolept 5 mg per day and Depakine all stopped suddenly at 29 August 1 September - to this day Hydroxyzine for a sleep 50 mg Link to comment
MichaelP1991 Posted October 3, 2018 Author Share Posted October 3, 2018 (edited) Will anyone help me , please ? What I should do or should not to do ? I suffer a lot, the worst is lack of thought , i dont take this drugs for long but im very afraid that my brain never come back to his previous state Edited October 4, 2018 by ChessieCat reduced font All drugs in 2018 22 June - 27 June Ranofren (Olanzapine) 5mg at night and 5 mg at the morning stopped suddenly get in major depression 9 August - 28 August Ketrel 25 mg per day Rispolept 5 mg per day and Depakine all stopped suddenly at 29 August 1 September - to this day Hydroxyzine for a sleep 50 mg Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus manymoretodays Posted October 4, 2018 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted October 4, 2018 Hi MichaelP, And welcome aboard. I'm sorry for the delay in response to your posts. Could you check above this post, and confirm that all of them are yours? We generally like to keep each member to just one introduction page. I'm so sorry for what you have been through. I think your previous state will return. It is frustrating to not be heard, or given full disclosure on these medications. Can you give us a time frame of when you were on some of the medications/drugs? If you could put your drug/medication history into a signature for us........that would be really helpful. Here's the link: Please put your withdrawal history in your signature The signature is the section that you see under other's posts(unless viewing from a phone device). Just follow the instructions in that link. This will greatly help us to make suggestions as to your individual situation. Are you on any medications now? Was your amphetamine usage prescribed by a doctor? I'm also wondering if you are of age of consent in Poland? What I mean by this, is are you over the age of 18 years? Here in the U.S., that is usually considered the age of consent. You mention that your mother and yourself are a bit at odds now. Has a doctor been consulted as far as the one enlarged pupil? That might be a good idea. That doesn't sound like an allergic reaction. Best to make sure that it isn't due to anything else, than the medications that you were given. I have seen some other members report this symptom........but I'm not finding a specific topic on it tonight. I think that you are having some W/D(withdrawal). Even with relatively short term use of these medications..........withdrawal can result, from abrupt discontinuation. You may have also had some adverse effects from your medications as well. I'm going to just give you some links and further information right now, as I'm not sure what you might have read yet on site. We generally recommend a harm free reduction of 10% or less from A/D's(antidepressants) and other psychiatric medications Why taper by 10% of my dosage* When we take medications, the CNS (central nervous system) responds by making changes over the months and years we take the drug. When the medication is discontinued, the CNS has to undo all the changes it made. Rebuilding the neurotransmitter production and reactivating the receptor and transporter cells takes time -- during that rebuilding process symptoms occur. Also with the changes in medications, up and down.......often havoc results on an already sensitized nervous system. Dr Glenmullen's withdrawal symptom checklist you might find some of your symptoms here^ What is withdrawal syndrome? https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/392-one-theory-of-antidepressant-withdrawal-syndrome/ Brain remodeling Are you having any improvement in symptoms, even once in awhile? The Windows and Waves Pattern of Stabilization There are 2 supplements that you may find helpful Omega 3, fatty acids( fish oil) Magnesium, nature's calcium channel blocker It's best to just start one new thing at a time however, start low, then keep records as to what you are adding or changing. We also have a symptoms and self care forum and I'll include just one link to some non-drug techniques to cope now This page acts as your main page, or introduction/journal page now. You've now introduced yourself to the community and can continue to post symptoms here, and ask questions about your situation here as well. I've given you a lot to look at and you don't need to try and look at it all at once. Good to have it all referenced, in one place though. Do try to get the signature done. That will help to make it a whole lot clearer to us, as to how we might best help. Love, peace, healing, and growth, mmt Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks. Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988. In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm. Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time). 5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014) 12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs. My last psycho med ever! Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to 2016 Dec 16, medication free!! Longer signature post here, with current supplements. Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016. And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed. Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022, and again finally 5/25/24. Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜 None of my posts are intended as medical advice. Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider. My success story: Blue skies ahead, clear sailing Link to comment
MichaelP1991 Posted October 4, 2018 Author Share Posted October 4, 2018 Hi thanks for response . Im not on the medication from 29 August . I stopeed cold turkey after i leave hospital . My amphetamine usage is not prescribed by a doctor , in Poland amphetamine is illegal drug . Ye im in age of consent , im 27 years old but im live with my mother ,these whole quarrels result from the fact that she does not understand that drugs have done it to me, she thinks I'm sick or something , she thinks legal drugs cannot do this . So far no doctor was informed about the pupil, from the information I found on the internet this should not have connection with tablets but it happened to me after Ranofren. I confirmed all the information above is from me . As so far lack of any improvement , the worst symptoms is that i cannot think and my vocabulary it is tragic ,also my memory is tragic ,im cannot comunicate properly , im wrote about this in my story . Free reduction is not for me because im stopeed all drugs about month ago . When i have time i tried to read all stuf that you send me . Thanks for everythink All drugs in 2018 22 June - 27 June Ranofren (Olanzapine) 5mg at night and 5 mg at the morning stopped suddenly get in major depression 9 August - 28 August Ketrel 25 mg per day Rispolept 5 mg per day and Depakine all stopped suddenly at 29 August 1 September - to this day Hydroxyzine for a sleep 50 mg Link to comment
nicolantana Posted October 4, 2018 Share Posted October 4, 2018 Read some of the succes stories man, there are very encouraging ones out there! late July...lexapro 10 seroquel 25.....due to mild depression......adverse reaction, suicidal thoughts, hospitalization August....felt that meds were ripping stomach apart....docs didn't believe me..upped meds to seroquel 125, lexapro 20, mirtazapine 30, olanzapine 20....stayed on these drugs unitl mid november......severe anhedonia all the time...mid novemeber 2016 , began taper.....very small windows of emotion...Christmas....off everything by Christmas day......last six weeks, cried and laughed on a number of occasions for first time since taking initial meds....8 occasions of strong emotion over 6 weeks in ealry 2016.......doubting recovery...... BIG WINDOW IN july 2017, felt incredible, lasted a month or so, felt close to recovered...window left, september to Chrimstas 17 was anhedonic hell.....Turn of the year, January 2018, some very strong days (a window) offering renewed hope back to hell until late February 2018, strong 10 day window....followed by anhedonic wave for 7 months straight! not a flicker of normalcy September 2018 ...incredible window...followed by three month wave.January 2019.... a strong window window subsided, but new baseline was higher.....life since January 2019 ( 9 months and counting) has been far better. Complete anhedonia is gone!! God, I've tears writing that. I am far from recovered, but far from hell...to use a scale, if life is rated out of a hundred, I was about minus 50 for the majority of 2 years..I know feel about 30 per cent of self, experiences intermittent flickers of normal life regularly....My days have more quality and I am optimistic of recovery. Link to comment
MichaelP1991 Posted October 4, 2018 Author Share Posted October 4, 2018 I read some but they almost all related with antidepresant and almost all say that recovery takes years(and even if so there is no certainty that this happen to me) ... ,its not encouraging beacuse i dont have that many strenght inside me to withstand this for so much time , i dont know how to live with that , my life (especially social life) is destroyed for a couple of months , i can not imagine that i cannot think and comunicate properly for years , its a hell , people ask me what happen with me and i dont know how to answer beacuse they dont understand what hapeen to me and they dont understand that legal drugs can do such a think , i dont really know is the withdrawal or is some adwers reaction , i think i have some advers effect because when im taking ranofren my right ankle sweeled strong and my right muscle in arm hurts with movement , the ankle resolved after i stopeed ranofren but my right arm hurts strong to this day , but the worst think that is my cognitive function , im obsesed with it i read so many articles that say neuroleptics change the brain forever and im terrified that im always be so stupid , quiet strange human , i rather hang myself when this symptoms dont go away , i dont want to live like that... All drugs in 2018 22 June - 27 June Ranofren (Olanzapine) 5mg at night and 5 mg at the morning stopped suddenly get in major depression 9 August - 28 August Ketrel 25 mg per day Rispolept 5 mg per day and Depakine all stopped suddenly at 29 August 1 September - to this day Hydroxyzine for a sleep 50 mg Link to comment
Administrator Altostrata Posted October 4, 2018 Administrator Share Posted October 4, 2018 Welcome, Michael. My guess is your nervous system is still recovering from being pressed down by all those drugs. It's pretty common that people will feel emotional anesthesia, disorientation, and maybe depression afterwards. I think you will naturally heal over time. Be patient, this will take some months and be very gradual. If I were you, I would not take any drugs or drink alcohol, let your nervous system settle down. Can you talk to a counselor or therapist in the meantime? Are you in a life situation that might be depressing? Can you get fish oil and magnesium supplements? See http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/36-king-of-supplements-omega-3-fatty-acids-fish-oil/http://survivingantidepressants.org/topic/15483-magnesium-natures-calcium-channel-blocker/ A lot of people find them helpful. Try a little bit of one at a time to see how it affects you. This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner. "It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein All postings © copyrighted. Link to comment
MichaelP1991 Posted October 5, 2018 Author Share Posted October 5, 2018 Of course i dont take any drugs ,( im never again take them for the rest of my life) and i dont drink alcohol .I drink magnesium every day and i want to buy a fish oil , i give it a try . I can talk to some therapist but i dont think so she/he understand that legal drugs can do this , she/he probably take the blame to illegal drugs so this is weak support . My life situation is preety stable , not depressing , i have a family who loves me ( dont understand me but loves me for sure ) and i have money ( i work ) so life situation is not depressing , the most depressing is my situation that i cannot think and communicate properly , this is very depressing , before this i was very inteligent guy , you could talk to me to whatever topic , now my head is completly empty , this hurts me the most .Is this also common ? Do you know people had the same cognitive problems after neuroleptics and they come back to thinking ?? All drugs in 2018 22 June - 27 June Ranofren (Olanzapine) 5mg at night and 5 mg at the morning stopped suddenly get in major depression 9 August - 28 August Ketrel 25 mg per day Rispolept 5 mg per day and Depakine all stopped suddenly at 29 August 1 September - to this day Hydroxyzine for a sleep 50 mg Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Glosmom Posted October 5, 2018 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted October 5, 2018 Hi Michael, I have read from many places on the internet (and on this site) that folks on antipsychotics that either CT or taper (fast or slow) do and can recover back to normal. Hang in there. Try to think positive and know you will get better in time. From what i have read people who CT can start to feel better after about 12 to 18 months but until then they have mentioned a tough time with their thinking/cognition. I have also read that people who taper (antipsyhchotics) don't really feel back to normal until they finally get completely off the medication. My daughter is coming up on 2 years of being on risperdal and we have about 6 more months to taper. So 2 1/2 years is a ridiculous amount of time if you would have asked me in the beginning of all this...but at least we have hope that she may be back to normal at some point in the future. Hang in there....there is no easy way out of this except time. You can do it. peace, glosmom 2016 - Oct -Daughter started Risperdal (for steroid induced psychosis that never went away after stopping prednisone) Nov - dose increases stopped at 1.5mg in Dec 2017 - Jan- weaned from 1.5 to 1.0 in 2 weeks then 1.0 to .5 in two weeks and then off. Feb. 3 weeks of increased psychosis, pacing, insomnia, other awful symptoms so late Feb - Back on 1.5 mg Risperdal. May - decrease to 1.25mg, two weeks later 1.0mg - symptoms started again. June - held steady at 1.25mg for 6 weeks and switched to liquid (3 ml syringe). July - started 10% taper every 3 weeks, October - .8 mg, December - .7 mg . 2018 -Jan- 0.65 mg, Feb- 0.59, Mar-0.50, late April - .40mg, July- .36 mg, Aug - switched from 3 mL syringe to 1 mL syringe for more accuracy (her dad and i were not sure we were giving her the same dose when in between the 'dashes' on the 3 mL syringe.) Aug -.30 mg (3mL syr)/.44 mg (1 mL syr) difference due to med in the tip of both syringes). Sept- .28 mg (3mL syr)/.42 mg (1 mL syr). Oct - .16 mg (3 mL syr)/.30 mg (1 mL syr). Nov.- .06mg (3mL syr)/.20 mg (1mLsyr). Dec. - tip only/unmeasurable (3mL syr)/.10 mg (1mLsyr) 2019- Jan -.06 mg (1 mL syr), Feb- .025 mg (1 mL syr), Feb 27, 2019 - jumped to zero!! Link to comment
MichaelP1991 Posted October 6, 2018 Author Share Posted October 6, 2018 One year or even more , and its not guarantee that i heal ? Its hell and the worst think is that i dont even need this medication , i cant think at all , im even trouble with get my mind together to write somethink , i have question to Altostratra , Do you know people had the same cognitive problems after neuroleptics and they come back to thinking ?? I fell like im destroy my nervous system,(i read that the larger pupil shows that my nervous system is damage) im fear that it never come back ,i cry almost all the time , also i read many articles on the internet say that this drugs permanently alter brain , what do you think about that ? is that true ? All drugs in 2018 22 June - 27 June Ranofren (Olanzapine) 5mg at night and 5 mg at the morning stopped suddenly get in major depression 9 August - 28 August Ketrel 25 mg per day Rispolept 5 mg per day and Depakine all stopped suddenly at 29 August 1 September - to this day Hydroxyzine for a sleep 50 mg Link to comment
MichaelP1991 Posted October 7, 2018 Author Share Posted October 7, 2018 I dont know if i can handle this ... I have question to Administrators , what do you think about permanent damage or irreversible change to the brain after neuroleptics ? Do you think its true ? Do you know people had the same huge cognitive problems(cannot think at all ) after neuroleptics and they come back to thinking ?? Sorry for asking again but no one answers and im really in real suicidal agony All drugs in 2018 22 June - 27 June Ranofren (Olanzapine) 5mg at night and 5 mg at the morning stopped suddenly get in major depression 9 August - 28 August Ketrel 25 mg per day Rispolept 5 mg per day and Depakine all stopped suddenly at 29 August 1 September - to this day Hydroxyzine for a sleep 50 mg Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Gridley Posted October 7, 2018 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted October 7, 2018 Antipsychotic survivors? Interested in your stories. - Success stories ... There are many success stories of members healing from antipsychotic drugs, indicating the damage is not permanent or irreversible. Above is one link. Also Google "SurvivingAntidepressants.org antipsychotic success stories" Gridley Introduction Lexapro 20 mg since 2004. Begin Brassmonkey Slide Taper Jan. 2017. End 2017 year 1 of taper at 9.25mg End 2018 year 2 of taper at 4.1mg End 2019 year 3 of taper at 1.0mg Oct. 30, 2020 Jump to zero from 0.025mg. Current dose: 0.000mg 3 year, 10 month taper is 100% complete. Ativan 1 mg to 1.875mg 1986-2020, two CT's and reinstatements Nov. 2020, 7-week Ativan-Valium crossover to 18.75mg Valium Feb. 2021, begin 10%/4 week taper of 18.75mg Valium End 2021 year 1 of Valium taper at 6mg End 2022 year 2 of Valium taper at 2.75mg End 2023 year 3 of Valium taper at 1mg Jan. 24, 2024: Hold at 1mg and shift to Imipramine taper. Taper is 95% complete. Imipramine 75 mg daily since 1986. Jan.-Sept. 2016 tapered to 14.4mg March 22, 2022: Begin 10%/4 week taper Aug. 5, 2022: hold at 9.5mg and shift to Valium taper Jan. 24, 2024: Resume Imipramine taper. Current dose as of Aug 26: 4.0mg Taper is 95% complete. Supplements: multiple, quercetin, omega-3, vitamins C, E and D3, magnesium glycinate, probiotic, zinc, melatonin .3mg, iron, serrapeptase, nattokinase, L-Glutamine, milk thistle, choline I am not a medical professional and this is not medical advice. It is information based on my own experience as well as that of other members who have survived these drugs. Link to comment
MichaelP1991 Posted October 7, 2018 Author Share Posted October 7, 2018 Thanks for the replies , i read some stories but i cannot find people who had such big problem with thinking , and they come back ,this scary me because i guess im the only one , i surviving everythink but be unable to think is the worst ,and its happen only after 5 days on olanzapine i cannot enjoy nothink because i know i cannot share it with another person , my social life was completly destroyed . Also today i have fever and some like flu symptoms , i dont know if it from withdrawal . My another symptom about which i do not mention is that i cannot sleep without sleeping tablets , i take them everyday for about a 1.5 months , im not sure if that fact can worse the symptoms i had . Thank for the replies , this is my only suport with this All drugs in 2018 22 June - 27 June Ranofren (Olanzapine) 5mg at night and 5 mg at the morning stopped suddenly get in major depression 9 August - 28 August Ketrel 25 mg per day Rispolept 5 mg per day and Depakine all stopped suddenly at 29 August 1 September - to this day Hydroxyzine for a sleep 50 mg Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Gridley Posted October 7, 2018 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted October 7, 2018 Members' experiences indicate that difficulty thinking, sometimes known as "cognitive fog," also improves with time. Flu-like symptoms are a common withdrawal symptom. Insomnia is one of the most common withdrawal symptoms. What are the sleeping tablets you are using? Please add this and the dosage to your signature. Account Settings – Create or Edit a signature. Many sleeping pills are addictive. Here are some links to alternative methods to help you sleep: Melatonin for sleep It's best to start at a very low dosage, such as .25mg, and gradually increase if needed to the lowest effective dose. Important topics about symptoms, including sleep problems Gridley Introduction Lexapro 20 mg since 2004. Begin Brassmonkey Slide Taper Jan. 2017. End 2017 year 1 of taper at 9.25mg End 2018 year 2 of taper at 4.1mg End 2019 year 3 of taper at 1.0mg Oct. 30, 2020 Jump to zero from 0.025mg. Current dose: 0.000mg 3 year, 10 month taper is 100% complete. Ativan 1 mg to 1.875mg 1986-2020, two CT's and reinstatements Nov. 2020, 7-week Ativan-Valium crossover to 18.75mg Valium Feb. 2021, begin 10%/4 week taper of 18.75mg Valium End 2021 year 1 of Valium taper at 6mg End 2022 year 2 of Valium taper at 2.75mg End 2023 year 3 of Valium taper at 1mg Jan. 24, 2024: Hold at 1mg and shift to Imipramine taper. Taper is 95% complete. Imipramine 75 mg daily since 1986. Jan.-Sept. 2016 tapered to 14.4mg March 22, 2022: Begin 10%/4 week taper Aug. 5, 2022: hold at 9.5mg and shift to Valium taper Jan. 24, 2024: Resume Imipramine taper. Current dose as of Aug 26: 4.0mg Taper is 95% complete. Supplements: multiple, quercetin, omega-3, vitamins C, E and D3, magnesium glycinate, probiotic, zinc, melatonin .3mg, iron, serrapeptase, nattokinase, L-Glutamine, milk thistle, choline I am not a medical professional and this is not medical advice. It is information based on my own experience as well as that of other members who have survived these drugs. Link to comment
Administrator Altostrata Posted October 7, 2018 Administrator Share Posted October 7, 2018 On 10/6/2018 at 8:15 AM, MichaelP1991 said: One year or even more , and its not guarantee that i heal ? Its hell and the worst think is that i dont even need this medication , i cant think at all , im even trouble with get my mind together to write somethink , i have question to Altostratra , Do you know people had the same cognitive problems after neuroleptics and they come back to thinking ?? I fell like im destroy my nervous system,(i read that the larger pupil shows that my nervous system is damage) im fear that it never come back ,i cry almost all the time , also i read many articles on the internet say that this drugs permanently alter brain , what do you think about that ? is that true ? Michael, we would not go to the trouble of running this site if we didn't see people healing. Yes, people heal. It can take a long time and can be very frustrating. You will need to be patient. Stop reading things that upset you. Very sorry we cannot offer guarantees to you or anyone else in this complicated world. This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner. "It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein All postings © copyrighted. Link to comment
MichaelP1991 Posted October 7, 2018 Author Share Posted October 7, 2018 Yes i understand that you cannot offer guarantees , only death and taxes are guarantee in this world . Anyway you and others doing wonderful job running this site and help people because i notice that almost all people dont understand this problem or dont belive that legal pills cause so much damage for so much long time ,they say you are probably ill or something , even psychiatric doctors ( i talk to 2 of them ) tell me that is imposible to this drug alter me for so much time , i dont know why they are so ignorants about that . About this reading about permanent damage , i found many topics about that so its scared me alot and i want to hear your perspective on that , is that true or not , but i understand that you see on this site a lot people healing so you cannot belive that this drug done irreversible damage ? All drugs in 2018 22 June - 27 June Ranofren (Olanzapine) 5mg at night and 5 mg at the morning stopped suddenly get in major depression 9 August - 28 August Ketrel 25 mg per day Rispolept 5 mg per day and Depakine all stopped suddenly at 29 August 1 September - to this day Hydroxyzine for a sleep 50 mg Link to comment
Administrator Altostrata Posted October 7, 2018 Administrator Share Posted October 7, 2018 No, I do not believe the drugs cause irreversible damage. However, you can convince yourself you will never get well and this will be so. Unless that's the outcome you want, it's better for your spirit and nervous system to turn away from those fearful thoughts. This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner. "It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein All postings © copyrighted. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus ChessieCat Posted October 7, 2018 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted October 7, 2018 These might help you to understand why it can take time: Brain Remodelling Video: Healing From Antidepressants - Patterns of Recovery And this: "Basically- you have a building where the MAJOR steel structures are [...] to be rebuilt at different times - ALL while people are coming and going in the building and attempting to work. It would be like if the World Trade Center Towers hadn't completely fallen - but had crumbled inside in different places.. Imagine if you were [...] to rebuild the tower - WHILE people were coming and going and [...] to work in the building! You'd have to set up a temporary elevator - but when you needed to fix part of that area, you'd have to tear down that elevator and set up a temporary elevator somewhere else. And so on. You'd have to build, work around, then tear down, then build again, then work around, then build... ALL while people are coming and going, ALL while the furniture is being replaced, ALL while the walls are getting repainted... ALL while [...] is going on INSIDE the building. No doubt it would be chaotic. That is EXACTLY what is happening with windows and waves. The windows are where the body has "got it right" for a day or so - but then the building shifts and the brain works on something else - and it's chaos again while another temporary pathway is set up to reroute function until repairs are made." * NO LONGER ACTIVE on SA * MISSION ACCOMPLISHED: (6 year taper) 0mg Pristiq on 13th November 2021 ADs since ~1992: 25+ years - 1 unknown, Prozac (muscle weakness), Zoloft; citalopram (pooped out) CTed (very sick for 2.5 wks a few months after); Pristiq: 50mg 2012, 100mg beg 2013 (Serotonin Toxicity) Tapering from Oct 2015 - 13 Nov 2021 LAST DOSE 0.0025mg Post 0 updates start here My tapering program My Intro (goes to tapering graph) VIDEO: Antidepressant Withdrawal Syndrome and its Management Link to comment
MichaelP1991 Posted October 7, 2018 Author Share Posted October 7, 2018 No , of course its not the outcome i want , really i can convince myself that i never get well and it will happen ? All drugs in 2018 22 June - 27 June Ranofren (Olanzapine) 5mg at night and 5 mg at the morning stopped suddenly get in major depression 9 August - 28 August Ketrel 25 mg per day Rispolept 5 mg per day and Depakine all stopped suddenly at 29 August 1 September - to this day Hydroxyzine for a sleep 50 mg Link to comment
Administrator Altostrata Posted October 7, 2018 Administrator Share Posted October 7, 2018 27 minutes ago, MichaelP1991 said: No , of course its not the outcome i want , really i can convince myself that i never get well and it will happen ? Haven't you been doing this so far? This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner. "It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein All postings © copyrighted. Link to comment
MichaelP1991 Posted October 8, 2018 Author Share Posted October 8, 2018 Im try to don't doing it , i have hope that im recover but its hard when so much sources tell that cognitive problems dont go away , or it take many years to have improved , this is scary that couple of years from your life is taken away , and you cannot do anythink , this is so sad when you see that people around you think normally and enjoy life when you are in "another world" for unknown amount of time . Im never in my life expierence something like this so it causes panic in me but i thought that no matter what healing is happen ? All drugs in 2018 22 June - 27 June Ranofren (Olanzapine) 5mg at night and 5 mg at the morning stopped suddenly get in major depression 9 August - 28 August Ketrel 25 mg per day Rispolept 5 mg per day and Depakine all stopped suddenly at 29 August 1 September - to this day Hydroxyzine for a sleep 50 mg Link to comment
MichaelP1991 Posted October 9, 2018 Author Share Posted October 9, 2018 Is this even possible that my Brain react that (thinking blocked ) after only 5 days on Olanzapine ?? All drugs in 2018 22 June - 27 June Ranofren (Olanzapine) 5mg at night and 5 mg at the morning stopped suddenly get in major depression 9 August - 28 August Ketrel 25 mg per day Rispolept 5 mg per day and Depakine all stopped suddenly at 29 August 1 September - to this day Hydroxyzine for a sleep 50 mg Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus ChessieCat Posted October 9, 2018 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted October 9, 2018 Please click on the arrow (top right of the box) and read this post. The heading of the post is BUT I ONLY TOOK IT FOR A WEEK: * NO LONGER ACTIVE on SA * MISSION ACCOMPLISHED: (6 year taper) 0mg Pristiq on 13th November 2021 ADs since ~1992: 25+ years - 1 unknown, Prozac (muscle weakness), Zoloft; citalopram (pooped out) CTed (very sick for 2.5 wks a few months after); Pristiq: 50mg 2012, 100mg beg 2013 (Serotonin Toxicity) Tapering from Oct 2015 - 13 Nov 2021 LAST DOSE 0.0025mg Post 0 updates start here My tapering program My Intro (goes to tapering graph) VIDEO: Antidepressant Withdrawal Syndrome and its Management Link to comment
MichaelP1991 Posted October 9, 2018 Author Share Posted October 9, 2018 O ok , thanks . In this post is written that minimum 18 months are need to full recover , its impossible to recover soon than this ? All drugs in 2018 22 June - 27 June Ranofren (Olanzapine) 5mg at night and 5 mg at the morning stopped suddenly get in major depression 9 August - 28 August Ketrel 25 mg per day Rispolept 5 mg per day and Depakine all stopped suddenly at 29 August 1 September - to this day Hydroxyzine for a sleep 50 mg Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus ChessieCat Posted October 9, 2018 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted October 9, 2018 On 5/22/2018 at 5:03 AM, brassmonkey said: One of the most frequently asked questions we get here at survivingantidepressants.org is some variation of “How long am I going to feel this way?”. The simple answer is “we don’t know”. I could stick with that and save myself writing the rest of this essay, but I’m not going to. It’s much too important a question to just brush off in that manner. For many, withdrawal from psychiatric drugs can be a process that puts one’s life on hold, causes extreme emotional disruption and intense physical symptoms, and we all want it to stop now. Before we get too far there are some things I need to say about this essay. Most of you will find it very upsetting, triggering and not what you want to hear. The information presented here is what I have gathered from my experiences and from helping several thousand people with their journeys to remove these drugs from their lives. To date there are no scientific studies dealing with this information, just data collected from forums such as survivingantidepressants.org and paxilprogress.com. I am presenting it because people need to know what they are up against, and as many of us have discovered withdrawal from psychiatric drugs can be brutal. An understanding the time involved in tapering, withdrawal and recovery from psych drugs is very important to that recovery. The fact of knowing that there is an endpoint in sight makes it a little easier to bear. It also helps in making plans for one’s life and relationships while tracking one’s progress along the way. There’s one very important point to bear in mind throughout this entire process: Healing is happening all the time. Even if you don’t feel it, from the very first dose reduction the body is sorting things out, making adjustments, reconnecting neural pathways. There’s a tremendous amount of work for the body to do so at first it will seem that things are getting worse instead of better. It’s all part of the healing process which is going on every minute of every day. We often point out that each individual’s withdrawal experience will be unique, and they are. This makes it very hard to predict how long any individual will be experiencing any given set of symptoms. making it so I will have to be talking in generalities for this essay. Although I will be saying that many things take a minimum of so many weeks or months, those numbers are just that, a minimum. Many, many people will be on the long end of those statements and a good many will take even longer. We frequently have people thinking “well, I’m a special case, so I can go faster”. From painful experience, I can honestly tell you “you’re wrong”. Trying to rush things is the most certain way of making them take longer and that longer time will be very uncomfortable. If you have CTed or Fast Tapered, it is going to take a long time to stabilize and an even longer time to very slowly taper off. The one hopeful note is, in the end, given enough time it does work. * NO LONGER ACTIVE on SA * MISSION ACCOMPLISHED: (6 year taper) 0mg Pristiq on 13th November 2021 ADs since ~1992: 25+ years - 1 unknown, Prozac (muscle weakness), Zoloft; citalopram (pooped out) CTed (very sick for 2.5 wks a few months after); Pristiq: 50mg 2012, 100mg beg 2013 (Serotonin Toxicity) Tapering from Oct 2015 - 13 Nov 2021 LAST DOSE 0.0025mg Post 0 updates start here My tapering program My Intro (goes to tapering graph) VIDEO: Antidepressant Withdrawal Syndrome and its Management Link to comment
dj2010 Posted October 9, 2018 Share Posted October 9, 2018 5 hours ago, MichaelP1991 said: Is this even possible that my Brain react that (thinking blocked ) after only 5 days on Olanzapine ?? Hi Michael, i was on ant-psychotics (olanzapine and seroquel) for 15 years, plus many other drugs, I have been off all drugs now for 18 months and feeling almost back to normal, only have cognitive difficulties after not slept for a few days but the insomnia is almost back to normal now also, hang in there it will get better 2001 - 2005 prozac, 2001 - 2017 various benzos, mainly diazapem and zanex, 2002 - 2017 olanzapine or seroquel, 2002 -2017 propanolol, 2005 - 2009 venlafaxine 75mg , forced to go cold turkey off venlafaxine as moved Thailand, doctor cut me off and couldn't get it there, severely ill for over 2 years, countered withdrawals with more zanex and seroquel 2014 returned to UK, mainly to get treatment getting off meds doctor advised to taper seroquel over a few weeks, severely ill and bed bed-bound so reinstated it, 2015 tapered seroquel myself slower over a few months, was off it 2 months and was too ill so went on olanzapine, became zombie and too tired to get out of bed, went back on seroquel, very depressed so went back on venlafaxine, didnt work so doctor swapped to zoloft became very agitated so back on venlafaxine June 2016 - felt strong enough to begin tapering again, started what I thought was a slow taper of all meds, 2016 July Not had any alcoholic drink since this date, 2016 October completely off diazepem, 2017 Feb completely off seroquel, 2017 March completely off proponanlol, 2017 April (day before birthday) completely off venlafaxine, OFF ALL MEDS 11/4/2017, was fine for nearly 3 months and then delayed withdrawal hit, supplements taking: turmeric capsules, NiaCel (nicotinamide riboside), Vit B12 sublingual, Vit B3, Vit B6, Vit B1, apple cider vinegar, manuka umf 10 honey, camu camu powder, melatonin when needed, epsom salt baths, juices, smoothies, Intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/topic/15175-dj2010-off-all-meds-for-3-months-and-been-fine-now-bad-insomnia/ Link to comment
MichaelP1991 Posted October 9, 2018 Author Share Posted October 9, 2018 I need help , my mother wants to send me to compulsory treatment to the hospital for a year , she tell me that its impossible that legal drugs can do this to me (doctor say that) and she tell me that im shizofrenia after illegal drugs , she tell me that i invent all my symptoms (espescially empty/blank head ) and she say that this forum is like a a sect , i dont know what to do , i rather kill myself than again gets this drug , she also wants to give me antidepresant but i refuse All drugs in 2018 22 June - 27 June Ranofren (Olanzapine) 5mg at night and 5 mg at the morning stopped suddenly get in major depression 9 August - 28 August Ketrel 25 mg per day Rispolept 5 mg per day and Depakine all stopped suddenly at 29 August 1 September - to this day Hydroxyzine for a sleep 50 mg Link to comment
MichaelP1991 Posted October 9, 2018 Author Share Posted October 9, 2018 I also need advice about hydroxyzine that im using for sleep , i should using it for so long ? if my symptoms dont get worse by this ? All drugs in 2018 22 June - 27 June Ranofren (Olanzapine) 5mg at night and 5 mg at the morning stopped suddenly get in major depression 9 August - 28 August Ketrel 25 mg per day Rispolept 5 mg per day and Depakine all stopped suddenly at 29 August 1 September - to this day Hydroxyzine for a sleep 50 mg Link to comment
Administrator Altostrata Posted October 9, 2018 Administrator Share Posted October 9, 2018 (edited) 5 hours ago, MichaelP1991 said: I need help , my mother wants to send me to compulsory treatment to the hospital for a year , she tell me that its impossible that legal drugs can do this to me (doctor say that) and she tell me that im shizofrenia after illegal drugs , she tell me that i invent all my symptoms (espescially empty/blank head ) and she say that this forum is like a a sect , i dont know what to do , i rather kill myself than again gets this drug , she also wants to give me antidepresant but i refuse Are you a minor child? If not, I'd stop asking your mother for advice about psychiatric drugs. You will need to make decisions for yourself. As long as you keep complaining, she will want to help you by sending you to the doctor or hospital. If you don't want to hear this, stop complaining to her. Tell her you will handle your own business. 4 hours ago, MichaelP1991 said: I also need advice about hydroxyzine that im using for sleep , i should using it for so long ? if my symptoms dont get worse by this ? If hydroxyzine is working, it's okay to keep taking it. What we see is that it eventually stops working, then you have to stop it. Since you went cold turkey off your drugs August 29, has your sleep improved, stayed the same, or got worse? On 10/4/2018 at 3:16 PM, manymoretodays said: There are 2 supplements that you may find helpful Omega 3, fatty acids( fish oil) Magnesium, nature's calcium channel blocker It's best to just start one new thing at a time however, start low, then keep records as to what you are adding or changing. We also have a symptoms and self care forum and I'll include just one link to some non-drug techniques to cope now Are you able to get these supplements? Edited October 9, 2018 by ChessieCat changed my mother to your mother This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner. "It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein All postings © copyrighted. Link to comment
Shane88L Posted April 9, 2019 Share Posted April 9, 2019 Hi Micheal, I'm really feeling for you, as I went through this similar problem also, as I only took olanzapine for 3 and a half weeks on a small dose. My thinking was GONE. No thoughts, just fear. A terrible deadened existence. But!! You will get better. I am starting to feel better, very slowly. Questions about is your brain damaged etc. I ask myself also, but, the brain heals. It heals. It is a really tough, really, really tough time you're going through. I feel like I can relate... If you read my posts from last year, maybe it'll help. You will get better Michael. It is the hardest thing I know. You are healing, yes, from only taking the drugs for that short time, your brain needs time to return to normal. You will become a stronger person from this, and I didn't believe that 5 months ago when I read it, but it's true! I am a...better person, more caring than I used to be, for survivors like you and for myself included. I'm still not fully healed, but life is getting better. If you have a place you feel safe in, and people who accept and love you, you will really benefit...You need these things... Also, I'm sorry that your mother doesn't accept your feelings... That's not nice at all... You know what you are feeling and that's all there is. If she won't accept your feelings, well... I'm sorry to say this, but she isn't a good person for you. Shoe doesn't sound like a healthy person to me and I'm sorry if that offends you! Send me a message whenever you wish if you like. 😃 Kind regards, Shane. Reason for Medication Anxiety (money problems, future, lack of physical safety, dangerous environment) causing mild insomnia. Summary 2010 - Lexapro - (took one tablet (vomiting, tremors, high anxiety) stopped without any issues) 2013 - Cymbalta - (60mg daily for 7 months - cold turkey without any major issues aside from nausea/vomiting, "brain zaps" and dizziness) 2013 - Seroquel - (a low dose for roughly 1 month - weight gain of 20kg, cold turkey because of rapid weight gain without any issues) 2018 - September 4th - (Cymbalta 20mg for two days, stopped due to tremors & anxiety) 2018 - September 9th - (Olanzapine 2.5mg until October 3rd, then 5mg once, then back to 2.5mg once, then took random varying doses every day for a week from 2.5mg up to 5.0mg due to panic caused by the drug, then I attempted withdrawal Cold Turkey (recommenced at lower dose after 4 days of trying to withdraw Cold Turkey - I took 0.625mg every night until I finally successfully stopped cold turkey roughly one week later). Link to comment
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