Stuckinmyhead13: Anafranil / clomipramine my story

[Stuckinmyhead13]

I started on a medicine called anafranil about 6 months ago in July. By far the worst decision in my life, I'm suffering from the worst widthdrawl symtoms. Including emotional blutness, pssd, lost of memory. My whole identity and personality is gone, I'm in emoitonal pain and depressed every day. I notice on the med that I completely lost my sex drive and erections we're completely gone. I'm very scared that I will never have my sexuality back again. I'm young and can't live like this for long. These meds prescribed to me were supposed to help me. I suffer from anxiety and depression with OCD . From what ive researched and read there's no cure for pssd! I've read multiple accounts and posts with no hope. I dont know what I'm going to do moving forward. If anyone could help please!

[WiggleIt]

Dear Stuckinmyhead13,

Welcome to SA!  We're glad you've found this site for support, but of course wish you weren't going through this.  Let me start by assuaging your understandable fears and telling you that people do recover from psych med withdrawal and they do recover from PSSD.

The symptoms you describe are all typical of WD (withdrawal), and we have many Success Stories on this site of people who have recovered from their WD journeys and from a variety of WD symptoms. The timeline for everyone's recovery is different, and it goes in a pattern we refer to as "windows and waves," which is a way of saying it goes two steps forward and one step back, with the overall progress moving forward. We understand how completely distressing all of these WD symptoms are, but I'm going to give you more info later in this reply that will show you very real, very tangible reasons to believe that recovery happens. All those stories you've heard about PSSD not healing?  Well, I'm going to show you stories of PSSD (and other WD symptoms) that HAVE healed.
 

What we've seen here on SA is that there are so many, so many cases where psych meds end up exacerbating original symptoms or straight-up adding new problems.  It is an under-researched area in psych medication, but there are slowly bits of research popping up in the medical field acknowledging what we on SA have known for a long while, which is that psych meds and psych med WD can go very badly for a significant number of people.  Regardless, we do get better from what the meds have done, and that's the part to keep in mind.

I've still got questions about your medication history, and hope you don't mind replying with more detail:

When did you stop anafranil and what dosage were you on?  
Did you taper down or did you stop cold turkey?
Or are you still on it now?
Are you now or have you previously been on other meds in addition to anafranil?

This info would be really helpful.  In addition to a more detailed reply, I'm also going to ask you to add a concise medication list as your medication signature on this site.  That way, we can have a detailed history and a quick reference.  Here are instructions to write a concise list for quick reference:

a.) Look at the top right of the page where your name appears

b.) Click on your name and you'll see a pull-down menu appear

c.) Under that menu, click on Account Settings          
d.) You'll get taken to a new page.  Look at the left side of that page
e.) Click on Signature
f.) Fill out a short list of your medication history and dates you took the meds in the box that pops up.  (For example, you can just write Sertraline 60 mgs from July 2016 to Sept 2018.)  
g.) Click Save and then you can go back to the rest of the site and keep chatting

I don't want to overwhelm you with too much info, but I think it's important to link you up with several success stories, so please take the time to read what's below:

About the Windows and Waves of recovery:

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/82-the-windows-and-waves-pattern-of-stabilization/

 

PSSD recovery story (Lossleader):
https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/3523-success-lossleaders-recovery-from-protracted-zoloft-withdrawal-and-pssd/?tab=comments#comment-39880

PSSD recovery story (Djderek):
https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/13023-djderek-i-had-pssd/?tab=comments#comment-246535

PSSD recovery (Lightatendoftunnel1):

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/7871-lightatendoftunnel1-me-again/?tab=comments#comment-118724

 

There are more recovery and PSSD success stories on SA, but this is a good amount of info for now.  We'll keep our eyes open for your reply and updated medication signature.

Warmly,
Wiggle

Edited March 4, 2019 by WiggleIt
Font color needed correction; wording updated for concision

[Stuckinmyhead13]

Thanks wiggle, I been on and off anti depressants majority of my teenage-adult life. I was trying new med for my OCD called anafranil 50mg daily. When I started I notice a decrease in sex drive, libido about a month in. I was on the med for a total of 5 months before I came off. I quickly tappered down and was off in November 18. I started in July and it completely took.away my sexuality. I was researching into what is was and came across pssd. To my surprise there's no recovery stories and people say it's permanent. I'm lost and depressed it's been 6 months post ssri widthdrawl and nothing is changing. I've read it can take years to recover! Any suggestions would be helpful. Thanks 

[ChessieCat]

Hi Stuck and welcome to SA from me too,

 

Please create your drug signature using the following format.   Keep it simple.  NO diagnoses or symptoms please - thank you.

• details for last 2 years - dates, ALL drugs, doses
• summary for older than 2 years - just years and drug/s

Account Settings – Create or Edit a signature

 

This is your own introductions topic where your can ask questions about your own situation and journal your progress.

[Stuckinmyhead13]

Post sexual dysfunction and emotional numbness

 

Hello ,, if you are reading this, I wanted to give am update how I'm doing. 

 

I'm currently 3 yrs off my psych drugs that I took back in February 2018. I still struggle with sexual like side effects that affect my relationships and friendships. Also, still can't enjoy hobbies,tv, food, or drug anymore.

 

I've tried ending my life , and been in a couple psych wards since withdrawal from my drugs(anafranil)

 

I'm not sure how much longer I can endure this pain and suffering. I've lost trust in the medical healthcare to treat my symptoms. They have told me its all in my head and I'm oberhinking it. I feel defeated and used. Starting to become lonely also from the lack of intamicy in my life and friendships.

 

I sleep all day and barely leave my house. If anyone can give me any hope please do. I've started to become hopeless and reckless with my life. 

 

Edited November 27, 2021 by ChessieCat
added Intro topic title before merging with intro topic

[Altostrata]

On 11/27/2021 at 2:01 PM, Stuckinmyhead13 said:

I still struggle with sexual like side effects that affect my relationships and friendships. Also, still can't enjoy hobbies,tv, food, or drug anymore.

 

Hello, @Stuckinmyhead13 How do your sexual-like side effects affect your entire life? What are these side effects?

 

Has the emotional anesthesia changed over time?