Judith: Healing will happen!

[Judith]

Hi @Peter23, 

 

Thank you for reaching out and for your lovely kind words! They touched my heart.❤️  I am continually amazed that God has used my biggest challenge in life to give hope and inspiration for others. Makes it that much more meaningful and blessed 😇

 

You, my friend are also a brave, courageous soul, that has a lot of perseverance and trust that you can do this and are OK!  💪🏻

One of the biggest things I learned and keep learning every day is to try to be OK even though things don’t feel OK. Trusting the process. Allowing your body and brain to do what it needs to do to get back to balance, and instead of being so fearful, try to look at it as a normal process and more like an observer.  I realize the fear that we feel during this rebalancing process is a more organic chemical based fear than our true nature.  Remember that always   I know that’s a big challenge, but it really helps when you can even just do that for a few minutes.  Try to go about your day as best you can living as normally as you can and focus on other things as much as you can. Be gentle and kind with yourself.  And not putting a timeline on when you need to feel better.  
 

This is the great lesson I continue to learn even nine years off that drug that every day there’s a practice of letting go of old patterns and beliefs that keep us stuck in a loop. I continue to feel more well-being and balanced every day. Because life on this earth isn’t always easy.  One day we feel super connected to life and God and then the next day we can be feeling discouraged, etc. It’s practicing the acceptance that this is the flow of life. Asking for the grace and serenity to accept the things we cannot change,  the courage to change the things we can, and the wisdom to know the difference    And trusting we are never alone and God & our angels & guides are always here with us. Asking for Help to see all of this from a higher perspective. 😇🙏

 

I am so pleased to hear you’re feeling a little better.!  Those days will continue to be more frequent. God hasn’t given you the desire to be free in body, mind and spirit without giving you the strength, courage and perseverance to do it. I am so proud of you brave soul - You can do this!!  💪🏻👏🏻👏🏻
 

Sending so much love and many hugs. 🤗❤️😘. 

Judy 

 

[Elyssa143]

@Judith

 

Hi my sweet friend. I am so sorry Ive taken a week to respond. I am so glad your doing so well! That all sounds so wonderful. I am 5 years off all pharmaceuticals and really question if the damage is permanent. I do do more in life, but im far from normal or healed unfortunately. I do still have the scary mental stuff, depression, si and aka. I have no clue as to why Im still struggling with these and it is very upsetting. I know im sorry not the message I want to write and im sure you were hoping to hear. Of course better yes but still no where near healed. I am going to try eliminating all sugar and carbs and see. Big hugs thanks for always being there. Im glad your doing well

[MichelleE]

Hi Judith,  I am new to this site.  I was put on amitriptyline 10mg in November 2022.  I took it for 14 days and had to stop as I was having a bad reaction to the medication.  I am 8 months off from the drug and I am left with terrible anxity and panic.  I have waves (which I am in right now) of dizzy spells and anxiety so hightend i just want to stay in my room and not move from my bed.  I refuse to go on any other medication.  I am currently working and finding it so difficult to do so.  I can't wait for the day that I can wake up and not feel like this anymore. I never used to be like this.  I admit I had a life event that sent me into an anxiety hole but due to the reaction off the medication the anxiety is sky high.  People tell me that I should be out of this healing process right now and it makes me think that my symptoms are all in my head.   From your experience can someone still suffer like this after only taking a drug for 14 days?   your story makes me feel a little better.  I got all the horrible side effects, the brain zaps, the anxiety the panic, muscle twitching.  I suffered bad for 3 months when stopping wiht sleep but that has gotten better.  Eyes are very blurry still.  A lot of headaches.  I just am hoping and praying this gets better very soon.

[Judith]

Hi @MichelleE

 

So nice to hear from you! Sorry you are having such a bad reaction to such a short time on that drug. I don’t have direct experience with that considering I was on it for 14 years! . But I have read stories of similar situations where people have only taken it for a short time, and had a similar unpleasant long term reaction.  I know it’s extremely scary.  No, symptoms are not in your head! . These are exaggerated neuro emotions caused by the rebalancing of chemicals in your body causing over exaggerated sense of fear and anxiety, etc.
 

Please don’t listen to people who say that you should be better by now. Your body is going to take as long as it takes.  And it certainly doesn’t seem fair!! However it’s what you’re dealing with so try to focus as much as you can on living your normal life even though I understand that’s a huge challenge, but what choice do we have?  
 

I always highly recommend reading Baylissa Frederick’s book Recovery and Renewal. It helped me so much on this journey.
 

this experience also teaches us to rely on the higher power of God for strength and courage and comfort

 

 You can do this!  You are brave and strong!  Trust your body’s innate intelligence to balance and heal. And maybe consider some outside clinical therapy to help with whatever life event you’re also dealing with.  
 

Sending you lots of prayers for healing and comfort and strength, my friend.🙏😇🙏❤️

 

Judy 😘

[Darabella]

Hello there Judith, thank for your story of hope and healing! I am doing better than the worse times lately, but suddenly lady issues make me feel weirder and disconnect more. Hope it goes away when cycle normalizes! Also alszo, am wondering if you had issues with having to take other things during withdrawal. For example as, I need to renew tetanas booster shot and just got a cut/punctor wound so I am scared to take that shot and also scared to get tetans! Things like this making me extra crazy and feel bad because so sensitive I don't know what happens or what is best. 

 

I wonder if the people who heal just happen to avoid all issues like that, no other medicinzes like biotics or sickness, or shots? Or do they get better anyway too? 

 

Very scare of what to do. Hope you living life well! Thanks you Judyy. 

[Judith]

Hi @Darabella,

 

So nice to hear from you!   I understand your fears and concerns because we all had them. No one who has experienced withdrawal  and rebalancing symptoms from these drugs gets by unaffected by other every day life issues, such as illnesses, hormones, shots, & other stressors. The organic fear symptoms seem to magnify everything else that happens in our lives to a disproportionate place where even our fear has fear! 
 

I saw in one of your other posts that you got the shot and everything was fine. Glad it worked out. I understand this is the biggest challenge in your life right now, but please try the best you can to dial down the fear and focus on the things that are going right and what you’re grateful for.  It will help you & your brain & nervous system feel safer & balance quicker. And trust that your body is doing its best to get back to balance.  And it will!!  You can do this!  You are strong and courageous. 💪🏻

 

Sending many healing wishes and prayers , 🙏❤️

Judy 

[Darabella]

Oh Judy dear you are a kind one! Celebrations to you. Very true remarks. 

[gn11]

-‐

@judith

Hello I have been reading your postings and beautiful  words of encouragement to others. Thank you.

My story:I took a small dose of Citalopram supposedly for stress and hormonal  issues. I actually said yes to the medication because I was in survival mode in a steessful new job. It was against my better judgment. I tried to quit a year later and couldn't. I stayed on it and in 2016 I had eye surgery for glaucoma. I started having 

strange symptoms which I figured out were related to  wd by reading this site. I stabilized and made 10% cuts until June of 2021 when I stopped altogether.. At that time  i had already been experiencing  gut issues for several years. I had lost 45

lbs that last year after a hysterectomt made my gut issues worse. 

The first few months after quitting I went into severe wd: panic attacks depression ocd gut issues ringing of the ears dehydration shakiness 

blurry visión acid reflux histamin sensitivity etc. I am telling you all of this because after 2 years I'm much better but still 

have some way to go, specially with digestion and sleep. 

My visual disability got worse but I wonder if the blurriness is still part of the whole wd ⁷thing. I do have tunnel vision because of glaucoma and had one cataract surgery and will have another one after all of this improves further

.

As I  i have been slowly inching my way out of this and  improving   I stil feel discouraged and wonder about any thoughts 

or reassurances that all of this will come to an  end. I will probably have to live with a visual disability for the rest of my life but I could adjust better if I had stability. 

 

Any words of encouragement or típs for sleep and gut as I move closer to the end. I already do meditation and other wholistic and psychological methods. I am blessed with friends and groups (mostly on Zoom since I don't go out much) but I live alone.

 I have been in my ow spiritual journey for many years. I am grateful everyday for friends and all that I do have.

Blessings to you!

[Judith]

Hi @gn11, 

 

So nice to hear from you and thank you for your kind words.  Sounds like you’re still having some issues but glad to hear things are improving. Like I’ve learned from experience and said before,  the more you can focus on what’s going right and what you’re grateful for and focus on living as normal life as you can,  the better. The more we pay attention to symptoms & things we don’t like, the more it compounds the fear & makes it worse.   It’s a mind-body connection that is constantly teaching the brain that we are either in danger or are safe that then either calms us or perpetuates that fear loop.  Teaching the brain that we can be OK even when things don’t feel OK.  Then it will calm down and feel safe and symptoms will calm down as well.  
 

There’s a person on SA under the name Dignan that has a video about the mind-body connection that I watched that I think is fantastic as it relates to healing and symptoms. I use this approach even now in my own life when things come up like anxieties, old patterns & habits in my nervous system and gut, etc. that is so helpful.  
 

 I used to be a member of a group run by therapist Baylissa Frederick called Bloom in Wellness. She wrote a book about her own experience called Recovery and Renewal. She sent the group daily messages of encouragement and inspiration, and I saved many of them. Here’s one I want to share with you that  helps us all with our daily lives  -  
 

“Today, trust that somehow, you will find the strength to cope with your symptoms, no matter how persistent and severe they may be. Know that they are present only because they are a part of the healing process, and regard them as evidence of healing.

No matter how long it is taking - whether you are early on in your journey or you have been waiting for what feels like too long a time, withdrawal is temporary and when the timing is right for you, it will come to an end. You will be able to move on and resume a normal life.

In the meantime, do what you can to take care of yourself. Even if you don’t feel like it, keep telling yourself that healing is happening and the changes caused to your nervous system by the drug are being reversed. Be as nurturing as you can. Be gentle in what you tell yourself and what you accept as your truth. Don't tell yourself things that you would not say to someone you love and care deeply for.” 

Keep loving and caring for yourself through all this and trust that God is in control, and our angels are helping us, and that everything is here to help us learn and grow.  You are a strong, loving, brave soul and I’m very proud of you!!  😊
 

Sending many  hugs and blessings and prayers for healing and comfort and strength.  🙏😇❤️😘

 

Judy 

[gn11]

On 7/25/2023 at 10:40 AM, Judith said:

Hi @gn11, 

 

So nice to hear from you and thank you for your kind words.  Sounds like you’re still having some issues but glad to hear things are improving. Like I’ve learned from experience and said before,  the more you can focus on what’s going right and what you’re grateful for and focus on living as normal life as you can,  the better. The more we pay attention to symptoms & things we don’t like, the more it compounds the fear & makes it worse.   It’s a mind-body connection that is constantly teaching the brain that we are either in danger or are safe that then either calms us or perpetuates that fear loop.  Teaching the brain that we can be OK even when things don’t feel OK.  Then it will calm down and feel safe and symptoms will calm down as well.  
 

There’s a person on SA under the name Dignan that has a video about the mind-body connection that I watched that I think is fantastic as it relates to healing and symptoms. I use this approach even now in my own life when things come up like anxieties, old patterns & habits in my nervous system and gut, etc. that is so helpful.  
 

 I used to be a member of a group run by therapist Baylissa Frederick called Bloom in Wellness. She wrote a book about her own experience called Recovery and Renewal. She sent the group daily messages of encouragement and inspiration, and I saved many of them. Here’s one I want to share with you that  helps us all with our daily lives  -  
 

“Today, trust that somehow, you will find the strength to cope with your symptoms, no matter how persistent and severe they may be. Know that they are present only because they are a part of the healing process, and regard them as evidence of healing.

No matter how long it is taking - whether you are early on in your journey or you have been waiting for what feels like too long a time, withdrawal is temporary and when the timing is right for you, it will come to an end. You will be able to move on and resume a normal life.

In the meantime, do what you can to take care of yourself. Even if you don’t feel like it, keep telling yourself that healing is happening and the changes caused to your nervous system by the drug are being reversed. Be as nurturing as you can. Be gentle in what you tell yourself and what you accept as your truth. Don't tell yourself things that you would not say to someone you love and care deeply for.” 

Keep loving and caring for yourself through all this and trust that God is in control, and our angels are helping us, and that everything is here to help us learn and grow.  You are a strong, loving, brave soul and I’m very proud of you!!  😊
 

Sending many  hugs and blessings and prayers for healing and comfort and strength.  🙏😇❤️😘

 

 

Hello Judith,

 

Thank you for your words of encouragement ond support.  I am familiar with Balyssa's work; an amazing human being. I was part of her group years ago when I first developed wd symptoms before stabilizing and tapering. A 4 1/2 year process. I am now 2 years since I stopped the drug. I still have neuroemotions, sleep and gut issues that give me ringing in the ears and rather than anxiety I now go directly to grief. I am doing EMDR to see if I can work through some of this.  I saw the video you mention as well. I definetly think that the understanding brought up by the video is part of the story and I will research it further I am also looking at the Gupta program  although I already do many of the practices they suggest. I actually believe that if I can get

my sleep back to normal

 everything else will follow.

 I appreciate your encouragement to  focus on the positive and to believe that it all will come to an end. I often think of the transformative power of my current experiene,  including my vision loss. Thanks for helping me keep the faith.

Blessings💖

 

 

[Elodie]

On 6/20/2023 at 10:14 AM, MichelleE said:

 

 

[Elodie]

Hi Michelle,

I had a bad Reaction too only with two pills. It's long and hopeless but we will go out this hole.

I was better but I did Sport im April and I had a activation of Symptom. I want to stay im Bed the full day and night. I work too as nurse and it's complicated. It's like my brain is blocked.

I send you strength

Elodie

[MichelleE]

10 minutes ago, Elodie said:

Hi Michelle,

I had a bad Reaction too only with two pills. It's long and hopeless but we will go out this hole.

I was better but I did Sport im April and I had a activation of Symptom. I want to stay im Bed the full day and night. I work too as nurse and it's complicated. It's like my brain is blocked.

I send you strength

Elodie

I know how it feels, all I want to do is lay down and sleep all the time.  I’m sorry you had such a bad reaction as well.  It’s so hard but we can get through it I’m sure.  Sending you love and strength.

[Elodie]

On 8/5/2023 at 9:57 PM, MichelleE said:

 

 

[Elyssa143]

@Judith Hi Judith. 🩷 how are you doing?

[Judith]

Hi @Elyssa143

 

how nice to hear from you!   I am doing pretty well all things considered. My dad passed away on January 25. He was 96 and up until the last eight months of his life was doing very well. The last eight months have been rough. & he was ready to go back to heaven and be with my mom. So there’s a lot of comfort and relief in that.  Both my parents were the most unconditionally loving people I’ve ever known and they are sorely missed. They will always be in my heart, and all the hearts they touched.  I feel so blessed and grateful to have a loving, supportive family  to help each other through this time 💞

 

Trying to do my best to cope with the gloomy, cold weather in northeast Ohio. 
 

let me know how you’ve been doing. I hope you’re seeing more improvements.!

 

Judy 

[Elyssa143]

Oh @Judith. I am so incredibly sorry. That is so very heartbreaking. I lost my mom back in benzo withdrawl 10 years ago and that was so incredibly hard and there are days now that it seems to be even harder. Especially trying to nagivate through life without my mom has been hard. Sending you big hugs! I am 100% seeing improvements and not at all like I was. It isnt the hell or minute by minute survival as it once was. But I am not healed yet. I still do have the hard symptoms but not anywhere as intense or as long lasting. But it is still very difficult as the bad symptoms for me are very traumatizing. I have though fallen off with eating well and taking care of myself over the last two years and I do know that hasnt helped either. So im trying to get back on track as I know that has to help. I am definitely nore functional but no where near normal life is still "a struggle" for me. But improvements are huge comparatively speaking. I also have two teenage boys which makes my heart sad as ive struggled in withdrawal for most of my sons life. But they are healthy and "happy" so i try to be greatful. My business is successful which is amazing. I just wish I had more of my mental health and never felt this awful feelings but it is improving so I try to hold onto to hope that one day soon things will be even better. I still have no idea how im alive. Anywho i sure hope one day soon my message to you will be all healed! Thanks for sticking by my side. Big big hugs

[Judith]

@Elyssa143

 

thank you for your kind words and big hugs. It means a lot. ❤️

 

Glad to hear you’re slowly improving. Just want to reinforce and remind you that you are a brave, courageous, strong, and loving soul on this earth.  And you will continue to improve and feel normal again!   (although I’m not sure there’s an actual normal here in earth school 😊). All with God’s grace, and help from our angels and guides 😇🙏💖

 

sending big hugs back to you my dear 🤗 

stay in touch 

[mstimc]

23 hours ago, Judith said:

Hi @Elyssa143

 

how nice to hear from you!   I am doing pretty well all things considered. My dad passed away on January 25. He was 96 and up until the last eight months of his life was doing very well. The last eight months have been rough. & he was ready to go back to heaven and be with my mom. So there’s a lot of comfort and relief in that.  Both my parents were the most unconditionally loving people I’ve ever known and they are sorely missed. They will always be in my heart, and all the hearts they touched.  I feel so blessed and grateful to have a loving, supportive family  to help each other through this time 💞

 

Trying to do my best to cope with the gloomy, cold weather in northeast Ohio. 
 

let me know how you’ve been doing. I hope you’re seeing more improvements.!

 

Judy 

Hi Judith

 

So sorry to hear about your dad.  No matter how old you or your parents are, it is never easy to deal with the loss.  It took me quite a while to deal with the death of my father.  "Orphan" might seem a trite word for a grown person, but that's really what we become.  Prayers and positive thoughts going out to you!

[Judith]

Thank you Tim for your kind words. ❤️