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MindDrift: olanzapine / Zyprexa withdrawal, then Citalopram withdrawal

MindDrift

By MindDrift
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MindDrift

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@Altostrata

 

i think it’s a mixture of symptoms & depression, psychosis & feeling suicidal. Whatever it is I can’t take too much more & need some relief. Is it safe for me to go back up to 2.4 or 2.5? 

Olanzapine 2.5mg 2007 - 8.5.2020. 1.25mg held for 4 weeks then stopped.

 

Citalopram 20mg 2007 - December 2020. Tapered down from 20mg daily, to 1.25, by halving the dose, holding for 3/4 weeks after each reduction, then jumping off in March 2021.

 

23/6/ 2021 Reinstated Citalopram, 0.5mg, held for a week then increased to 1mg. Held for four weeks then increased to 1.5mg. Held for two weeks then increased to 2mg. held for two weeks then increased to 2.5mg. been on 2.5mg since 24/8/21

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Ariel
Ariel

@MindDrift   What a generous, encouraging post!    I'm happy for you that you are experiencing improvements.    Thank you for this inspiring update. Your words brighten m

Gridley
Gridley

Distraction is an important tool in dealing with withdrawal.   You don't need to make that decision at this point.    It is fantastic that the reinstatement worked and that you

Greatful
Greatful

@MindDrift  Hi I wanted to pop by and say you are doing a great job holding it together. I have been following your thread.  You sure have gone through a lot. I know with your strength and determinati

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Altostrata Grand Master

Altostrata

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Of course, you can go back to 2.5mg.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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MindDrift Contributor

MindDrift

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@Altostrata

 

I probably got about 2 hours of broken sleep last night where it feels like I've been on amphetamines or something. Feel much worse physically today. It's just that all over unwell feeling, pains in my legs, headache & having to force myself to eat. Just feel emotionally numb today instead of all the crying, regret & sense of loss I had yesterday. I'm not sure what's even going any more? Return of symptoms, startup effects, I just don't know?

 

Any idea what this is or when It's going to improve please?

 

Thanks! x

 

 

Olanzapine 2.5mg 2007 - 8.5.2020. 1.25mg held for 4 weeks then stopped.

 

Citalopram 20mg 2007 - December 2020. Tapered down from 20mg daily, to 1.25, by halving the dose, holding for 3/4 weeks after each reduction, then jumping off in March 2021.

 

23/6/ 2021 Reinstated Citalopram, 0.5mg, held for a week then increased to 1mg. Held for four weeks then increased to 1.5mg. Held for two weeks then increased to 2mg. held for two weeks then increased to 2.5mg. been on 2.5mg since 24/8/21

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Altostrata Grand Master

Altostrata

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I don't have any simple solutions. If you've had an emotional jolt recently, it can take a while for the hurt to go away.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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MindDrift Contributor

MindDrift

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@Altostrata

 

Thanks Alto!

 

Third day of reinstatement & still in so much pain. I really didn't expect this much trouble from trying to taper 2 x 0.01ml cuts then having to reinstate back up to where I was.

 

Yesterday evening I  had a couple of windows of feeling much better then back to the grind again. Slept about 7 hours last night, best for a few days, but back to feeling so awful today.

 

Mostly feeling depressed, cracked open & psychotic today. Getting very brief 5 minute windows of feeling mildly better though.

 

I'm only hoping that this 0.2ml increase is not going to take me the same time to stabilise as it did when I had to reinstate from 0 to 0.5. That took over two years.

 

x

Olanzapine 2.5mg 2007 - 8.5.2020. 1.25mg held for 4 weeks then stopped.

 

Citalopram 20mg 2007 - December 2020. Tapered down from 20mg daily, to 1.25, by halving the dose, holding for 3/4 weeks after each reduction, then jumping off in March 2021.

 

23/6/ 2021 Reinstated Citalopram, 0.5mg, held for a week then increased to 1mg. Held for four weeks then increased to 1.5mg. Held for two weeks then increased to 2mg. held for two weeks then increased to 2.5mg. been on 2.5mg since 24/8/21

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hayduke Contributor

hayduke

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Sorry to hear you're having such a rough ride at the moment, @MindDrift

 

Give it a few days, I always notice smaller dosage changes tend to make themselves known around day 4 through day 7, give or take.

 

Maybe park the tapering for a while until you're feeling more settled?

I am not a health professional - your actions are your own.  

Please do not seek tapering support via private message - "Any reason to hold is a good one"

My taper visualised as a graph   |   My intro thread

Backdrop:  2003 10mg olanzapine | 2004 2-3mg risperidone | end 2014 3wks aripiprazole

2015: olanzapine  10 -> 7½ -> 6⅔ -> 5mg  by crude pill cutter

2018:  Mar 5.00mg -> water titrated taper -> Aug2.5mg tablet and hold

Jan 2019 2.50mg water titration -> Jan 2020 1.214  -> Jan 2021 0.44 -> 2 Oct 0.205 ->3 Oct ZERO🥂

Jun 2023 💉150mg paliperidone "loading" depot shot, 100mg 1wk after Jul 100mg Aug-Dec 75mg/4wks

Jul 2023 2.50mg aripiprazole/day attempt to lower prolactin^

Jan-Feb 2024 cross taper off shots to 1mg risperidone

 

Ask not what you can do for your country, but what your country did to you"  -- KMFDM

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MindDrift Contributor

MindDrift

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@hayduke

 

Thanks for your message.

 

Starting to reset a bit now. Still all over the place emotionally but physical symptoms are pretty minimal today.

 

The way it's been the last few weeks & particularly the total horrors of the last two, I don't see me doing any more tapering ever. Plus, what I did was only two less than 5% cuts that have caused me so much physical & emotional pain, it's just not worth it.

 

Unless someone comes up with a miracle CNS reset cure, I can't see me ever getting off it now.

 

x

 

 

Olanzapine 2.5mg 2007 - 8.5.2020. 1.25mg held for 4 weeks then stopped.

 

Citalopram 20mg 2007 - December 2020. Tapered down from 20mg daily, to 1.25, by halving the dose, holding for 3/4 weeks after each reduction, then jumping off in March 2021.

 

23/6/ 2021 Reinstated Citalopram, 0.5mg, held for a week then increased to 1mg. Held for four weeks then increased to 1.5mg. Held for two weeks then increased to 2mg. held for two weeks then increased to 2.5mg. been on 2.5mg since 24/8/21

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MindDrift Contributor

MindDrift

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@Hanna72

 

Hello Hannah!

 

I'm having the mother of all difficult times after the above taper & subsequent reinstatement. On top of all that, I've had Covid for the last week & still testing positive.

 

It seems to be one massive long wave of withdrawal right now. I'm pretty despondent about it all right now. Feels as bad as it was when I reinstated in June 2021.

 

x

Olanzapine 2.5mg 2007 - 8.5.2020. 1.25mg held for 4 weeks then stopped.

 

Citalopram 20mg 2007 - December 2020. Tapered down from 20mg daily, to 1.25, by halving the dose, holding for 3/4 weeks after each reduction, then jumping off in March 2021.

 

23/6/ 2021 Reinstated Citalopram, 0.5mg, held for a week then increased to 1mg. Held for four weeks then increased to 1.5mg. Held for two weeks then increased to 2mg. held for two weeks then increased to 2.5mg. been on 2.5mg since 24/8/21

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Altostrata Grand Master

Altostrata

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When people get covid, they often feel terrible in all kinds of ways. Symptoms are not always related to withdrawal.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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Hanna72 Contributor

Hanna72

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Hi my dear friend @MindDrift

I am so sorry to hear about how painful the last few weeks have been for you. I was just reading your thread now to catch up. Sorry you had to experience this…..yet again. As once is not enough !

I understand you feel sad and frustrated that after all the effort and optimism about cutting, you might find yourself stuck at this dose and can’t see yourself becoming free from this drug. This is how I also felt after yet another horrific withdrawal episodes . I was about to call it quits. Who in their right mind would want to ever try tapering again ?!

Now months later I have tapered down yet again with some symptoms, but nothing as horrible as before. Yes we are going to feel more, things will come up from our past that these drugs have masked for years.
This journey is hard my friend. We have to deal with withdrawals symptoms and on top of that we get so many emotions and memories up on the surface. 
 

On 10/23/2023 at 8:55 PM, MindDrift said:

 

Starting to reset a bit now. Still all over the place emotionally but physical symptoms are pretty minimal today.

This is a good sign, it will settle, just like before… remember ? I know this sucks, but you have to be patient. You will be ok, I know you got this💪

 

On 10/23/2023 at 8:55 PM, MindDrift said:

Plus, what I did was only two less than 5% cuts

Some of us are really sensitive and can’t do larger cuts. It doesn’t matter how long the tapering takes I feel now, the only thing that counts is having as little wd symptoms as possible. And if you ever decide to try a small cut again, I would stay at that spot for a while if I were you. That’s what I plan to do when I get to the smaller dosages. You won’t loose anything by doing that but you might gain from it.
The way I look at tapering now is that I am grateful for being on 4 mg instead of 20 mg. And if I need to stay at 4 mg for some time, that’s ok too. Because that just might help me later on to achieve the big zero.

Hold on tight, you are strong and resilient. It’s just a stupid wave, it will pass, just like before.
Oh and one more thing, please don’t forget how far you have become. You are stronger than you think.
Take good care of yourself,  and get well soon.

 

I believe in you.

 

 

Edited by Hanna72
1

 


1999-2020  20 mg Paxil

Bridged with Fluoxetine to help me get off Paxil.

2022 Fluoxetine 15 mg 12/12 14mg 27/12  13mg jan 12mg feb 11mg mars 10mg, 9 mg 8,5 mg 7.6mg 7.0 mg 6,3 mg 5,6 mg 5,0 mg 4,5 mg 4,0 mg 3.6mg 3,2 mg 2,9 mg 2,6 mg 2,3 mg 2,0 mg 1.8 mg

 


I am not a medical professional nor is this a medical advice. I only talk from my own experience.

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MindDrift Contributor

MindDrift

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On 11/14/2023 at 11:33 PM, Hanna72 said:

@Hanna72

Hi Hanna.

 

Thanks for your lovely message of encouragement.

 

I seem to be back to some semblance of normality now; still not quite right but much better than I was. The horrors of the last few weeks have passed & I’m eating, sleeping, working & functioning again. Yeah, it has been properly disheartening having to experience what I went through after what I considered to be such tiny reductions. I still don’t think that I ever want to go through that again but tomorrow is always another day. I’m not even going to think about any more tapering until next Spring maybe, I just want to rest my CNS & try to have at least some stability for a few months. There’s so much going on in my life now and lots that I need to do for my family. I just can’t be in a position where I’m not able to function or be effective in what I need to do for them. 

 

Your message of support really brightened my outlook and opened my mind to the possibility of tapering again at a later date so thank you!

 

God bless you Hanna.

 

x

 

 

 

Olanzapine 2.5mg 2007 - 8.5.2020. 1.25mg held for 4 weeks then stopped.

 

Citalopram 20mg 2007 - December 2020. Tapered down from 20mg daily, to 1.25, by halving the dose, holding for 3/4 weeks after each reduction, then jumping off in March 2021.

 

23/6/ 2021 Reinstated Citalopram, 0.5mg, held for a week then increased to 1mg. Held for four weeks then increased to 1.5mg. Held for two weeks then increased to 2mg. held for two weeks then increased to 2.5mg. been on 2.5mg since 24/8/21

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