lo1999: Lexapro possible adverse reaction

[lo1999]

Hi all, I’ve been reading through this sight for a couple months and I need help/reassurance.

 

Around the end of january 2021 i began experiencing panic attacks for the first time. They last for hours and happened every night and sometimes in the day. Not knowing what was happening, I went to the doctors and was prescribed 5mg of Lexapro.

 

At first I thought they were working as my panic attacks practically vanished overnight. For the first two weeks my only symptoms were bad brain fog, night sweats, muscle twitching, and tiredness. As the weeks went on, my anxiety began to increase as well as depersonalization. It felt like i constantly had butterflies or adrenaline in my chest. I kept asking my doctor if this was normal and she assured me it was and that it would take a couple months for my body to adjust. So i foolishly stayed on for about 2 months. 
 

During this time I was going through a particularly difficult time with my (now ex) boyfriend. I started to feel numb, lost feelings for him, which ultimately made it hard to be around him. The numbness, dp/dr, and anxiety in my chest became too much to handle and i told my doctor i wanted off the meds. She told me to cut the pills in half for two weeks and then stop. I took 2.5mg for about 3 weeks, then took them every other day and then eventually stopped (i now know this is bad).Ever since, i have still had that anxiety in my chest, some brain fog, and what i assume is dpdr but it might have decreased in intensity a little. The anxiety is what is really getting to me, i’m in constant fight or flight over nothing, like im on a rollercoaster thats about to go down a steep track. I’m so scared that I have permanently damaged my brain since I stayed on for so long and did a bad taper. The only time i get some relief is at night where i feel 70% back to normal. I completely lost my sense of self, everything I love to do, and feel like I’m only getting worse. This and the ending of my relationship have pushed me over the edge. Please anyone offer me some support, whenever i tell anyone about this they don’t understand.

[getofflex]

Hello, and welcome to SA.  We are a peer owned and run forum of people who have been or are getting off of psychiatric drugs.  I'm glad you found us.  I'm very sorry for all the painful situations you have been dealing with.  It sounds as though you had an adverse reaction to the Lexapro.  You are probably having these withdrawal symptoms from a too fast taper, and from skipping doses at the end.  Have you seen any improvement at all in any of your withdrawal symptoms?  How is your sleep and eating?  Are you able to function in your day to day life?  I'm glad that you feel better at night, and are able to have some relief.  

 

Here is some information about how these drugs actually work.  This helps you understand why you are having the WD symptoms.  

 

How Psychiatric Drugs Remodel Your Brain

 

 

This helps you understand what withdrawal syndrome is: 

 

 Video on Recovery from Psych Drugs

 

What is Happening in Your Brain

 

 

Also, as we are recovering, we suggest keeping things slow, simple, and stable. This is extremely important. 

 

Keep it Simple, Slow, and Stable

 

 

Here are some techniques to cope with symptoms: 

 

Non Drug Ways to Cope with Withdrawal Symptoms

 

We don't suggest many supplements, but 2 that many of us find helpful are magnesium and omega-3 fish oil.  These can help calm you down and feel less anxious, especially the magnesium.  Here are the links for info about those. It is suggested to add one at a time, and start with a low dose to see how it affects you. 

Magnesium

 

Omega 3 Fish Oil

 

I've given you quite a bit of information here. Take your time to read and digest it.  Hang in there.  There is recover from this, but it takes a long time, and requires a lot of patience.  We look forward to hearing back from you.  

[lo1999]

Hi, thank you for the information, I’ll definitely read through it. I’m currently in CBT therapy which is helping me to not overreact to my anxiety and let it pass (albeit this is so hard). The only symptom that has subsided substantially is the numbness i felt on Lexapro. Who thought I would be so happy to cry! Other than that, i often wake up around 4am with intense anxiety and palpitations, and most annoying of all, i have the worst

earworms. The past four days i experienced intense anxiety and was having breakdowns every day but today my anxiety has been a little less. Will that anxiety go away one day? I just feel very disconnected from myself and life. I hope that this is a common feeling others have felt on here and that it went away. I’m not sure how often I’ll post on here as I think it may be leading me to further obsess about my symptoms. Did you or anyone you know become obsessed with your symptoms? I miss the days when I would wake up and go about my day and never think about anxiety or any of this stuff!

[lo1999]

Also, i am semi-functioning. I able to go to work but those past four days made me almost quit. I lost my appetite, was exhausted an a nervous wreck. Today though I had an appetite and was able to make myself food and clean my room. Trying to count that as a small win

[Altostrata]

Welcome, @lo1999

 

It sounds like you have withdrawal syndrome from going off Lexapro, particularly the alternating doses at the end, which we've seen can cause very bad withdrawal. 

 

If I were you, I'd get a prescription for liquid Celexa (citalopram), Lexapro's gentler sibling, from your doctor, and take 0.5mg (one-half milligram) per day. We've often see a very low-dose reinstatement of the drug will relieve withdrawal symptoms. You'd stabilize on this for some weeks and then taper by tiny amounts later.

 

I suggest citalopram rather than escitalopram (Lexapro) because it appears you had a fairly immediate bad reaction to 5mg escitalopram, the stronger drug.

 

Please let us know how you're doing. 

[lo1999]

Hi there,

I appreciate your response but I’m not sure I want to do that as I’m scared to go on any form of drugs again  I’ve been off them for 4 months now but being on them made me worse so I’m scared it will ruin any progress I have made. I hope you understand my worries 

[lo1999]

I’m honestly just confused by the whole situation so I’m sorry if I ask a lot of questions. The lexapro did end my panic attacks completely and finally gave me an appetite. But while I was on it everything did feel kind of hazy and out of body which i take is the dpdr. I would say around week 4 is when I started to develop that anxiety but it was also a week of something really stressful that I am working out in therapy. It’s like it solved some of my problems but created new worse problems. Can anyone answer my other previous questions? 

[Foxclover6]

10 hours ago, lo1999 said:

Hi there,

I appreciate your response but I’m not sure I want to do that as I’m scared to go on any form of drugs again  I’ve been off them for 4 months now but being on them made me worse so I’m scared it will ruin any progress I have made. I hope you understand my worries 

I'm in a similar situation. I did get the liquid solution to reinstate after 3 months, havent yet taken it.  I need to go buy a syringe.  I feel like I've made some sort of progress after 3 months but my anxiety is so bad that I can't just " be " if that makes sense. 

[lo1999]

@Foxclover6 I totally get how you feel and wouldn’t wish this anxiety on anyone :( 

[lo1999]

Today I woke up with intense anxiety and stomach issues from it but it seems that it has passed somewhat. Is it normal for my anxiety to go up and down throughout the day? Depsite that, my anxiety is always pretty bad in the morning and much much lower at night. If there was a scale of 1 (calm) to 10 (completely unbearable) the morning is an 8, throughout the day is a 6-7, and the night is a 4. Will the anxiety go away one day? It’s my biggest issue and i feel like my depression is a reaction to my anxiety if that makes sense.

[lo1999]

Will this anxiety go away one day? Did i permanently damage my brain? Is it normal to obsess over your symptoms? By that I mean back before i had panic attacks and went on lexapro i would just wake up and go about my day but now i’m like “how’s my anxiety?” “Am i anxious right now” i constantly have my attention on my mental state. Does that go away one day?

[getofflex]

20 hours ago, lo1999 said:

i often wake up around 4am with intense anxiety and palpitations, and most annoying of all, i have the worst

earworms.

It sounds like the common early morning cortisol spike, which all people have, but in WD it's amplified due to our sensitized nervous systems.  

 

Early Morning Waking

 

20 hours ago, lo1999 said:

i have the worst

earworms.

This is another common WD symptom.  I have the same thing myself.  

 

Ear Worms

21 hours ago, lo1999 said:

today my anxiety has been a little less. Will that anxiety go away one day?

I'm glad to hear the anxiety is improving some.  Any anxiety brought on by WD will eventually go away.  If you had anxiety prior to being on the drug, it may still be there, but there are many non drug ways to overcome anxiety.  

 

21 hours ago, lo1999 said:

I just feel very disconnected from myself and life. I hope that this is a common feeling others have felt on here and that it went away. 

This sounds like depersonalization/derealization.  This is very common in WD.  I've had this too, but it is almost gone now.  It does go away, but takes time. 

 

DP/DR

 

I'm glad to hear you are functioning at work even if it is a major struggle some days.  I'm glad you are feeling a bit better. 

 

21 hours ago, lo1999 said:

Did you or anyone you know become obsessed with your symptoms? I

OOhhh, yes, this is extremely common.  What I did to get my mind off my symptoms, was stay occupied doing something and keep my mind on that.  Walking also helps for me.  It's good not to dwell on the symptoms, as this just leads to more anxiety and depression.  

 

18 hours ago, lo1999 said:

It’s like it solved some of my problems but created new worse problems.

Yes, these drugs tend to do that.  For me, it took the edge off my anxiety and depression, but at the same time it blunted my emotions and made me more detached and apathetic.  It caused me to gain lots of weight and made me tired a lot, but yet I had trouble sleeping at night.  

 

6 hours ago, lo1999 said:

Is it normal for my anxiety to go up and down throughout the day?

Very normal.  Our cortisol and adrenaline tend to be higher in the morning, which are hormones/chemicals that activate the nervous system.  A CNS in WD tends to be activated anyway, so that just exaggerated it. 

 

No you did not permanently damage your brain.  I understand that you feel scared about your symptoms, and this is very normal, and understandable.  This WD is frightening, and we feel out of control.  It is scary when a drug is in control of our brain.  But given enough time and proper self care, your nervous system will eventually sort itself out, and you will gradually feel better.  Here is a link with a list of common WD symptoms: 

 

Dr. Joseph Glenmullen Withdrawal Symptom Checklist

[lo1999]

2 hours ago, getofflex said:

It sounds like the common early morning cortisol spike, which all people have, but in WD it's amplified due to our sensitized nervous systems.  

 

Early Morning Waking

 

This is another common WD symptom.  I have the same thing myself.  

 

Ear Worms

I'm glad to hear the anxiety is improving some.  Any anxiety brought on by WD will eventually go away.  If you had anxiety prior to being on the drug, it may still be there, but there are many non drug ways to overcome anxiety.  

 

This sounds like depersonalization/derealization.  This is very common in WD.  I've had this too, but it is almost gone now.  It does go away, but takes time. 

 

DP/DR

 

I'm glad to hear you are functioning at work even if it is a major struggle some days.  I'm glad you are feeling a bit better. 

 

OOhhh, yes, this is extremely common.  What I did to get my mind off my symptoms, was stay occupied doing something and keep my mind on that.  Walking also helps for me.  It's good not to dwell on the symptoms, as this just leads to more anxiety and depression.  

 

Yes, these drugs tend to do that.  For me, it took the edge off my anxiety and depression, but at the same time it blunted my emotions and made me more detached and apathetic.  It caused me to gain lots of weight and made me tired a lot, but yet I had trouble sleeping at night.  

 

Very normal.  Our cortisol and adrenaline tend to be higher in the morning, which are hormones/chemicals that activate the nervous system.  A CNS in WD tends to be activated anyway, so that just exaggerated it. 

 

No you did not permanently damage your brain.  I understand that you feel scared about your symptoms, and this is very normal, and understandable.  This WD is frightening, and we feel out of control.  It is scary when a drug is in control of our brain.  But given enough time and proper self care, your nervous system will eventually sort itself out, and you will gradually feel better.  Here is a link with a list of common WD symptoms: 

 

Dr. Joseph Glenmullen Withdrawal Symptom Checklist

Thank you so much for your response, it has really helped me come to terms that I'm not going crazy! I'm really trying not to look at this situation with complete negativity as I think that might only make this process worse. In regards to the obsessing over symptoms, I plan on not coming to this site too much as I think I tend to spend too much time reading through people's updates, and the negative ones only fuel my anxiety more. I just bought some books, word search puzzles, and plan on doing those to occupy my time :). For now, my anxiety is pretty intense and constant, and the only way I can cope right now is to go do some techniques I learned in CBT and tough it out.  Also been experiencing some head pain and brain fog but that's to be expected with this. How are you doing?

[getofflex]

You’re welcome. I’m glad I was able to help. When I was in early recovery I used to look at the GlenMullen symptom checklist. if I saw my symptoms in there it would reassure me that it was only withdrawal.  I’m glad you’re using some non-drug coping techniques for your anxiety. I want to share with you that walking helps me a lot. When we are anxious we have adrenaline and cortisol in our systems and walking helps to burn that off and calm us down.  Also meditation can help.  Do a google search surviving antidepressants.org meditation 

[lo1999]

Yes, I have been trying to walk my dog every day! it does help me get out of my head a little. Today has been... not so good. Every day has been a horrible struggle but this one is different. Instead of the horrible anxiety, I am completely spaced out and have severe dpdr and anhedonia. I know these are also common symptoms so I'm trying not to freak out over it. It could also be that my nervous system is so exhausted from all the anxiety that its shorting out for a second. I might also be quitting my job as it has just been so hard to work when I'm not all there. I really hope I can push through this. 

[lo1999]

@getofflexsorry I’m still figuring out the site and forgot to tag you above! I really apologize for all the questions. If I can ask one more, do symptoms you’ve experienced on ADs go away after withdrawal as well? for instance, lexapro caused me to have constant dpdr which subsided a little after I stopped taking it. However, here I am 4 months later with the most severe dpdr I think I’ve ever had  i can barely recognize anyone in my life and feel as though my memory has been wiped clean. Its so hard to hold a conversation. Thank you so much for replying, I’m going through this alone so it really means a lot that you have provided support 

[getofflex]

23 hours ago, lo1999 said:

Instead of the horrible anxiety, I am completely spaced out and have severe dpdr and anhedonia.

Yes, WD symptoms are known to morph from day to day.  It is unsettling, but try to remember this is normal for withdrawal from psych meds.  

 

15 hours ago, lo1999 said:

do symptoms you’ve experienced on ADs go away after withdrawal as well?

Yes, they do go away, because you are no longer on the drug.  I'm sure the DP/DR is scary and frightening.  I had a lot of this, and it is much better now than it was.  Did you read the link I gave above on DP/DR?  

 

It is possible a small reinstatement may help you. I know altostrata suggested it and you said no, but keep this in mind as a possibility. You would just do a very small amount, and taper off of that later on.  It's your choice, and I respect whichever way you choose to go.  

 

I'm sorry to hear you are going through this alone.  Try reading some of the other intro threads and perhaps you will find some other like minded people who are going through similar experiences.  

[lo1999]

Hi all. I haven’t been on here in a long time. I have some really good news and really bad news. I had an adverse reaction to lexapro years ago and recovered thankfully. 
 

In the past year I developed ocd from a traumatic event, and my therapist suggested i try medication again (despite me telling her medication was the most traumatic thing that has happened to me, and I’ve experienced A LOT of trauma). Well she eventually convinced me to try meds again. I went to my GP (bad idea) and was prescribed zoloft (despite me telling her i dont do well on ssris). I thought trying it low and slow could potentially prevent me from going through my last disaster again. I started at 12.5mg for two days and everything was fine. On the third day, all hell broke loose. That was the last time I took it. The following five days consisted of nonstop panic, restlessness, and extreme anxiety. All of the muscles on my body were tensing and spasming.  I couldn’t eat or sleep for five days. I threw up over and over. I was terrified. The next week things seemed to be leveling out again, i returned to work and saw my boyfriend. Then the week after it was back to hell. This all happened at the beginning of August and although my hunger has come back and i am able to sleep a little more, i feel as though I am getting so much worse. This week I’m experiencing severe depression and restlessness. Today i had SI and my muscles ache so badly and at the same time i feel so much adrenaline in my body. I’m so scared. Why am i getting worse? Has anyone had a severe reaction and recovered? My boyfriend broke up with me, I’ve isolated from everyone, and i fear i am going to lose my job but i need to pay my bills. Any encouragement would help. This is so much worse than last time

[lo1999]

I’ve been taking it minute by minute for two months now. I am so tired. My symptoms only seem to be getting worse. I am so scared i really did some damage here, and with only 12.5mg!! I keep praying to God to deliver me from this pain so that I can help people who are also going through this.

[lo1999]

Also I decided to stop my birth control. I am on the placebo week so I’m thinking about just not starting a new pack after. Any thoughts on whether this would help or hurt me? I also started taking fish oil supplements tao days ago, maybe thats why I’m worse?

[lo1999]

Up until now i had a very optimistic attitude through this and still had the drive to do things. Now nothing brings me any joy. Its so scary. Why am i getting steadily worse two months later?

[KenA]

Hi @lo1999 and welcome back to SA. Sorry to hear about your setback. I have asked a moderator to check in on you when they get a chance. Since you had an intro topic from a few years ago still on the site, I have merged your new Intro Topic into the old one. Best wishes for quick healing.

 

KenA

[lo1999]

Today the muscle pain has gotten better and I did not have the morning cortisol as bad, but last night i had 4 nightmares back to back that were very upsetting. Today i feel very fatigued and nauseous. Dp/dr, deep depression, and SI have made me nonfunctional today. I am so lost.

[Catwoman73]

Hi @lo1999, and welcome back?  I guess lol?  I never like to see anyone making a return!

 

I'm so sorry this happened to you.  Live and learn, I suppose, but it's a tough lesson.  Clearly, you are not one that can tolerate these drugs in any capacity.  Good to know.

 

We do have a thread on adverse reactions here- I'm not sure if you've seen it, but here's the link:

 

Immediate Adverse Reactions to Antidepressants

 

Unfortunately, the advice in this situation is not all that different from those experiencing withdrawal after prolonged use of these meds.  Healing takes time, and the only way out is through.  I suspect you are experiencing a nasty symptom wave that doesn't seem to want to end for you.  I know it's difficult, and I wish we had some magic, immediate cure, but it just doesn't work that way.  You are going to need time.  

 

Just as an FYI- 12.5mg of Zoloft is not as low a dose as you would think.  Because of the nature of the way these drugs work in the brain, even the lowest therapeutic dose of ALL SSRIs has a massive impact on the brain, occupying up to 80% of the receptors in your brain, even at tiny doses.  So if you've reacted badly in the past, it's not surprising that you feel like you've been hit by a freight train right now. 

 

I suspect that the emotional triggers you have experienced of late- losing a relationship, and financial concerns- are likely contributing to the severity of your symptoms.  Stress is a very well known symptom trigger for many of us.  I suspect your thoughts are absolutely spiralling right now, and this will only make things worse.  

 

The nervous system is a notoriously slow healer, so I can't tell you when this will get better.  But it WILL get better.  We are all healing, all the time, even when it doesn't feel like it.  You will get back to you.

 

As you heal, you will notice a pattern of windows where you feel better, and waves, where you feel worse.  This is normal- so the fact that you felt better briefly before plunging back into the nightmare is not at all surprising.  This pattern is actually a good sign that healing is occurring.  Read more about windows and waves here:

 

Windows and waves pattern of stabilization

 

There are some things you can do to help with healing.  Most are intuitive.  Eat a balanced, whole foods diet, stay well hydrated, engage in gentle exercise/movement and get adequate rest/sleep.  Avoid all neurologically active substances, inlcluding caffeine, alcohol, nicotine, and recreational drugs.  Using these things is like pouring gasoline on a fire.  And please don't try any more psych meds to deal with your symptoms!  As you've seen, their effects are not always predictable.

 

In terms of supplements, we only recommend magnesium and omega-3 fatty acids.  But it is quite possible to be hypersensitive to even our recommended supplements.  Hypersensitivies are common to all sorts of things when the nervous system is destabilized- even foods!  So if there's even a chance that you are sensitive to the fish oil, you may want to back off to a very tiny dose, once per day, to see if that helps.  

 

You may benefit from starting a symptom journal while you are on this healing journey.  Track your symptoms each day, rating them on a scale of 1-10 for severity.  This will help you see your windows and waves, and see how far you've come over time.  If you choose to track your foods and activities, you may be able to identify things that trigger symptoms for you, which makes this journey much easier.  Personally, I have so far identified that I cannot tolerate coffee (even decaf), chamomile, refined sugar, intense exercise, even slight dehydration, and magnesium (it's supposed to relax you- it gives me brain zaps and insomnia).  So intense tracking can be a very useful tool. 

 

As for dealing with your symptoms while you wait for healing to happen, I know how tough it is!  But it's really important to put your mind to learning some non-drug coping mechanisms, and adopting these as a way of life as soon as you possibly can.  We have many threads on coping strategies here, I'll link some below.  Personally, I have found practicing mindfulness every minute of every day to be the most important thing I've done.  I also use guided meditations, yoga Nidra, and recordings of nature sounds to help calm my nervous system, and induce sleep.  I use CBT techniques like box breathing, and challenging and replacing negative thoughts to help change the reactive pathways in my brain. And I keep myself busy and distracted by engaging in things that bring joy (or things that I know once did, when I'm feeling completely numb).  For me, this includes swimming (I feel almost normal in water!), dancing, cooking, spending time in nature, and engaging in artistic projects of all sorts.  It is very hard work to find ways to make this journey more pleasant, but it's important work!  It will make the journey easier, and will carry you through all of the stresses that life offers up, even when this is well behind you!

 

Apathy, anhedonia, emotional numbness, emotional anesthesia 

 Derealization or Depersonalization

 Non-drug techniques to cope with emotional symptoms

 Easing your way into meditation for a stressed-out nervous system

Music for self-care: calms hyperalertness, anxiety, aids relaxation and sleep

Ways to cope with daily anxiety

"Change the channel" - dealing with cognitive symptoms

Dealing With Emotional Spirals

 

In summary, please don't lose hope!  You will heal from this.  And we're here to support you along the way.  I hope you continue to come back and keep us posted!  And don't hesitate to read and comment on the intro threads of other members.  I think it would be really helpful for you to do this in order to create a community for yourself here.  After all, this is one of the only places you will find where everyone understands your pain, and will support you throughout your journey. 

 

Sending love and hugs- I look forward to helping you along the way, if I can. ❤️

 

 

[lo1999]

@Catwoman73 thank you so much, this made me tear up. You have no idea how much these words mean to me. I hope one day when I heal that I can help others too :’) I’ve been journaling my symptoms but I’m going to take your advice and start putting how my day was on scale. Is it normal for things to get steadily worse before they get better? I’m basically nonfunctional right now.

[lo1999]

Is akathisia permanent? I think I have it for two months now. I can’t concentrate on anything, everything sends me into panic, and my body feels wired. I don’t need to pace around but my body just feel so so restless always (although sometimes at night it settled down). I think its my worst symptom and it worries me that it wont go away.

[didiyana]

Good afternoon, @Ло1999 !

 

I'm so sorry you're experiencing it again but now you know it'll be over

Your story is a bit similar to mine, I also used an antidepressant for a short time (1 month), I can ask you how long did your recovery process take for the first time?

[lo1999]

@didiyana I’m sorry I don’t have an exact timeframe because that time period is kind of a blur for me but I think it took 6-7 months to be pretty functional and then maybe a year to be close to baseline. But keep in mind i was experiencing a lot of trauma at that time so that was definitely slowing things down for me. Praying for steady healing for both of us ❤️ 

[lo1999]

@Catwoman73 does anhedonia go away eventually? I think its the symptom that scares me the most. And I’m sure my dp/dr is not helping with it. I had DR before i took the zoloft but now i just feel extremely disconnected from myself and my emotions to the point where i dont even want to look at myself in the mirror! Which is crazy because i used to do that all the time 😅. Also it seems like today my symptoms are a little less bad? Is that a window? Or are windows only when symptoms are gone completely? I bought some magnesium lotion and rubbed it all over my body last night which seemed to help with the restlesness, or maybe it was placebo lol. All i know is that today its not as bad.

[lo1999]

@Catwoman73 the anhedonia makes it hard for me to do anything or have interest in anything.It feels so difficult doing even the littlest things, and i have no interest in talking to anyone or going outside. I hate it so much  

[Jane318]

1 hour ago, lo1999 said:

@Catwoman73 the anhedonia makes it hard for me to do anything or have interest in anything.It feels so difficult doing even the littlest things, and i have no interest in talking to anyone or going outside. I hate it so much  

I know Catwoman will reply soon, but just piping in to say that I (and many / most others here) struggle with same thing.  I am in midst of trying to recover from crashing this past summer, likely due to too-fast taper.  I had to up-dose a bit and am in month 3 of holding.  In my case, this has gotten better.  Still a struggle some (most) days, but not as bad as it was.  Follows the "windows and waves" pattern, but please hang in there, you will see improvement with time.  Recommend you track your symptoms / severity every day and/or journal so you can track your healing.  It can be hard to see progress day to day, but you will over time.  In the meantime, do the best you can - doing something every day, however small, will help.

[Catwoman73]

@lo1999- @Jane318 has it right- none of this is permanent.  It just takes time to heal, and you have to be very patient.  And you do have to force yourself out there a little bit.  When I'm at my worst, all I can mange is lying in the sunshine on a patio chair, or sitting on the floor petting my dog.  I have found that this is a really good time to try new things though- I'm taking a drawing class right now (I am most definitely no artist lol), and I always go, whether I feel like it or not, since I paid for it!  The thing is, I've never regretted going.  I always manage to enjoy myself, despite my symptoms.  Getting out the door is the often the hardest part!

 

1 hour ago, lo1999 said:

 Also it seems like today my symptoms are a little less bad? Is that a window? 

 

This is definitely a window.  Windows don't mean your symptoms are gone, necessarily (though for a lucky few, it can!), but it just means things are a little more tolerable.  I have daily mini windows in the evenings, where I just feel a bit more functional.  And I have longer windows that can last for days at a time!  And the landscape is always changing- next week, I may have a rotten week with zero breaks.  It's really important to just learn acceptance, and to roll with the punches.  Constantly battling what you are feeling is exhausting, and make this journey feel like such a long and terrible slog.  Acceptance makes it significantly less unpleasant.  I've said it to others here- learn to approach your symptoms with curiosity and compassion rather than fear and frustration.  It really does help!

[didiyana]

Thank you very much! I think it will be for us soon, and I will think about it 🙏

[lo1999]

Two day window :’) definitely still struggling but not nearlyyy as bad as last week

[Catwoman73]

1 hour ago, lo1999 said:

Two day window :’) definitely still struggling but not nearlyyy as bad as last week

 

Great news!  Enjoy it!

[lo1999]

Hi all,

 

window ended as quickly as it came yesterday. I am feeling pretty horrible. I also am terrified that i am experiencing sexual dysfunction but i cant tell if i am or if its the ocd+recent breakup. This had been scaring me basically since the start of my adverse reaction. Anyways my therapist is really recommending me to go on Lamictal because she had a patient have a “similar reaction” to ssri’s and Lamictal saved them. I know this isn’t a place for recommending meds, I’m just sharing what has been happening in my life lately.