MrHappy: Introduction

[MrHappy]

My family suffered a serious road accident in 1986. My wife was permanently disabled and our relationship deteriorated. Looking back, I believe I was suffering from PTSD but such things weren’t really recognised at the time. Challenging work and a challenging home situation left me “depressed” in 1998; although, looking back, it seems I was more bipolar than anything.  I was put on Prozac 20mg.

 

My doctor’s notes are mostly illegible but I went through Citalopram, Effexor, Venlafaxine, Amitryptiline and Fluoxetine over the next 18 years. Doctors could not explain why I kept having strange symptoms and tended to the “chemical imbalance” theory. And kept prescribing something new. “We’ll try this.”

 

I was never warned, never told to come off slowly.There was always the idea that psychotropics were not dangerous and I could just “keep taking them, just like blood pressure meds”. I started Duloxetine (Cymbalta) 30mg in 2016 and, in complete ignorance, went cold turkey in June 2018. I told my doctor what I was doing. My doctor did not respond. I went hyper, bordering on manic, got engaged to someone in another country: completely out of character. I enjoyed 4 weeks before the withdrawals hit, massively.

 

Unable to function, to think, to do anything, I assumed it would all pass and at first it did seem to. But 10 weeks after CT I slumped into serious depression. Weeks of windows and waves; passive suicidation; 2 visits to 2 different ERs. It was accepted that anyone feeling at risk should attend ER where they would be cared for appropriately, but their treatment of me was not kind.

 

The first ER kept me in a corner for hours until my anxiety levels were hitting the roof, then let me out with some sort of benzo.  The second told me – angrily and scornfully – to act my age and go home.  I started planning to sell my lovely home and live in a supported environment for the elderly. I was working but I have no memory of it. We scattered my mother’s ashes, but I was unable to respond emotionally, to speak even, drugged up on a low dose of Mirtazipine for a week. 

 

With a friend’s support, I reinstated; the only thing that might work. It did. And then, somehow, I found a support group online. No idea which one. I started planning ways to reduce slowly. Finally, just in time, I found the group I eventually worked with as a moderator. I have successfully - with several symptoms - followed the 5% maximum drop protocol since then. 40 months to drop from 20mg reinstatement dose to 1.6mg. The last six months have been gruelling. Each separate bead is now more than a 10% drop.

I run the Healing America Now website, independently. I am no longer part of the group that set it up. You can trust this site. It offers safe tapering advice – and more – for people taking Cymbalta / Duloxetine. It is steadily being improved: sources are being checked, recommendations reviewed.

[Hondo]

I am currently tapering from 20 mg. I have dropped to 71 beads from 130 since December. Can you describe your grueling symptoms. I pretty much feel like crap every day. I mostly feel awful in my head. Fogged, tired, eyes hurt…

[MrHappy]

Hi Hondo, I'm sorry you are suffering so much. Since I wrote my introduction, my symptoms have got much easier to manage. I no longer seem to have GI problems, constant need for the bathroom; the regular sobbing sessions I was having are much shorter and fewer; rage has eased and I don't get it at the moment; sleep is mostly fine; anxiety is manageable. All these and others were regular or constant features of my condition. However, I have been dropping again every 3-4 weeks since February and feel good. I still have "air hunger" problems and some fatigue, but that fatigue may be a result of getting old.

 

It seems to me that you have dropped faster than I did. The standard recommendation is no more than 5% drops from the previous dose, holding at least two weeks. It depends exactly when you started tapering. It is always suggested you should hold longer between drops if you are having a hard time. Personally, I would hold for a few weeks and see how that changes things. It may be that a 5% drop is too much for you and you should consider lower.

 

If you have been with CHW, then you will know there is a lot of support specifically for Cymbalta / duloxetine patients on Healing America Now. We have been working at editing the entire website and re-launching, but there is still a mass of useful information and ideas there which would help you, especially dietary / nutritional. Have a look.