Viinncceennt: My journey with Lexapro, meds switches and dysautonomia

[Viinncceennt]

Dear all,

 

Thank you for having me here.

 

I have a lot to tell and ask, but I will start with a brief introduction about my current needs and I will edit later with all the necessary details about my past and my journey until now.

 

I've been taking Lexapro 10mg for 8 years roughly. In late September/early October, I've been hospitalized with SI and during my 5-day stay there, they have changed my meds a lot (see my signature below). The first day following my first night there, dysautonomia/POTS symptoms began to appear (POTS, diminished respiratory arrythmia, complete insomnia and many many more).

 

Out of the hospital, my parents' GP continued my Lexapro 10mg prescription and added Zopiclone/Zolpidem for sleep (which only gave me 2 to 6 hours of poor sleep at best). He gave me Oxazepam 25mg or 50mg to use at will.

 

I've seen another psychiatrist later who changed my Lexapro 10mg to Cymbalta 60mg (with a week in between with 5mg Lexapro and 30mg Cymbalta). He changed the BZ for Diazepam (25mg a day to 40mg - I only use 5mg to 10mg) and Z-drugs for Alimemazine (2,5mg 1 or 2 hours before bed).

 

I'm know 8 weeks since the drastic change of my meds in late September and other changes in between as you have seen. My dysautonomia symptoms are still here and haven't changed a bit. I just come back from an appointment with an internist and he told me I was experiencing iatrogenic dysautonomia which he assured me would be temporary (I have big difficulties believing him). He told me those kind of meds changes, especially on a fragile mind like mine were disastrous. He added that the psychiatrist I've seen is notoriously known for bad practice but they can't get rid of her... He said I needed to stop those changes of meds and stay constant.

 

Anyway : I don't know if those POTS/dysautonomia symptoms will one day disappear (I know this website is not aimed at answering this), but as a first step, I wanted to switch back to Lexapro 10mg from Cymbalta 60mg. I wanted to know if you thought it was a good idea. I'm afraid of giving my brain another AD : especially another subtype - SNRI - which will alter again my brain in a different way + I'm afraid of getting hit by strong WD symptoms from Lexapro 10mg soon.

 

The switch in one week from Lexapro to Cymbalta was 1 week ago and I didn't suffer any symptoms. During this specific week, I was on 5mg Lexapro and 30mg Cymbalta. Do you think I can do the same thing to switch back to Lexapro 10mg?

 

My second need would be to help stabilize my nervous system because all my usual tools for this no longer work. I can't do relaxation exercizes or breathing relaxations anymore (dysautonomia symptoms have made my parasympathetic system kinda disappeared and my breathing are no longer relaxing, I'm in a permanent state of stress). I'm in a very dark place for some times now and I hope to find some relief at one point about this.

 

If I can see some improvement on that part, I later wish to be able to go on the journey of tapering Lexapro...

 

Thanks for your help.

 

Viinncceennt

[LotusRising]

Hi @Viinncceennt and welcome to SA,

 

Thank you for creating a signature. It sounds like you've been on quite a rollercoaster of medications. What we've seen here is that a pattern of going on and off psychiatric medications over the years can disrupt your nervous system, making it hypersensitive. 

 

Hypersensitivity and Kindling

 

FYI, we advocate a harm reduction tapering approach here. Just confirming, your goal is to stabilize and then come off your drugs?

 

Here are some links that you might find helpful:

 

Why taper by 10%

 

What is Withdrawal Syndrome?

 

The Windows and Waves Pattern of Stabilization

 

Keep it simple, slow and stable

 

Stability

 

Non-drug techniques to cope with emotional symptoms

 

 

9 hours ago, Viinncceennt said:

dysautonomia/POTS symptoms began to appear (POTS, diminished respiratory arrythmia, complete insomnia and many many more)

 

It's a little unclear to me when the dysautonomia began. You mentioned here that these symptoms started the night you were admitted to the hospital. Did something happen before you ended up in hospital?

 

For some reassurance, dysautonomia symptoms are quite common and I experience them myself. They have been slowly improving for me. 

 

 

10 hours ago, Viinncceennt said:

as a first step, I wanted to switch back to Lexapro 10mg from Cymbalta 60mg.

Did you feel stable on lexapro? 

 

10 hours ago, Viinncceennt said:

I've seen another psychiatrist later who changed my Lexapro 10mg to Cymbalta 60mg

Why were you switched to cymbalta?

 

In your signature, you mention diazepam, alimemazine, ambien and zopiclone - which of these do you take daily? Some of them are redundant. 

 

I've given you a lot of information here, so please take your time to read through the links.

 

When we get more specific details about your drug history, we should be able to give you a better idea of what might be going on, and how you might move forward.

 

Lotus Rising

 

[Viinncceennt]

Thanks for your answer dear LotusRising.

 

My story is complicated : I will try to be as clear as possible!

 

Don't hesitate to tell me if I share too many psychological details or triggers. I'll try to get more to the point but I have issues with that.

 

 

11 hours ago, LotusRising said:

Just confirming, your goal is to stabilize and then come off your drugs?

Yes. 

 

 

11 hours ago, LotusRising said:

It's a little unclear to me when the dysautonomia began.

The dysautonomia began the day after my first night at the hospital : I have been admitted in the evening, they gave me new meds before bed and the symptoms appeared the following morning.  

 

 

11 hours ago, LotusRising said:

For some reassurance, dysautonomia symptoms are quite common and I experience them myself. They have been slowly improving for me.

I've read a lot about it here and also on non iatrogenic dysautonomia/POTS websites. I'm almost sure (and scared) that my symptoms are permanent.

 

My nervous system was a wreck at the time, I had been traumatized there by the staff and the psychiatrists (paternalized, blackmailed, gaslighted, lied to) : so yes, I understand how this, added to the meds changes, did made my nervous system hypersensitive. But it's been 2 months and all the symptoms are exactly at the same level and never changed, whatever I do, eat or meds I take. There are no waves at all. And even if I had rough changes in the course of 4 days at the hospital, I went back on my previous treatment with Lexapro 10mg shortly on the 3rd day at the hospital and for 1 month, and I didn't feel a single change during that time. 

 

It's just my gut feeling and my rational thinking from all the testimony and scientific literature I've read, and from my symptoms really. I've the same results on deep respiration tests (which is one test among many to assess the ANS) as critical type 2 diabetics diagnosed with cardiovascular autonomous neuropathy (CAN), I've been positive on every day POTS since then, I have complete insomnia without pills... I monitor everything daily in charts. I've read many people getting permanent dysautonomia  because of high stress or medication : I think I'm one of them sadly.

 

I've seen here how dysautonomia on an hypersensitive nervous system can be scaring but disppeared very often even if it's slowly. I'm not denying this at all!

 

11 hours ago, LotusRising said:

Did something happen before you ended up in hospital?

Honeslty, it's confusing even for me. I was less and less stable in the last few months, I think because I overthought my new diagnosis (autism, maybe ADHD) by hyperfocusing on myself, and by reaching for medical help which never helped but I was still trying to get help from them instead of making a step back to understand myself and my patterns better. So I had many episodes in the months before the hospital, where I felt hopeless and was thinking about suicide. I was reaching to my mother then, since that's the only "friend" I have, and we've discussed many times : should I go to the ER or not, should I go to the psych ward or not... I was a scared, clueless and lonely man-child. The reality I see now, is that my nervous system was hypersensitive and overwhelmed with all my overthinking, as well as my stuborness and rigid thinking patterns about myself, and me harmfuly focusing on my father and brother which were not reaching out to send me love during this tough time... instead of understanding what was going on and how I could help myself. I felt misunderstood a lot during this time and it made me enter states of nervous hypersensitivity (high unexplained anxiety from everything, just existing really) but it always disappeared with sleep and relaxation, grouding, sport...

 

This high unexplained anxiety, I feel it constantly now. But since I can’t exercise, sleep naturaly or do breathing relaxation (because of dysautonomia), it doesn’t disappear and it’s eating me away a little bit more each day. The benzos have less and less positive effects on me. I try to lay down, blocking noise and light, and I think about the few good memories I have and the simple life I would have had if I had not make all those mistakes : that's the only thing I can do to stop me from experiencing that high anxiety, that dreadful terror. I wait for the evening and dreaming of suicide make me peaceful. I know it's morbid, I don't want to trigger anyone but I think it's useful to know where I'm at. To be clear, I stil want to stabelize and quit despite this feeling.

 

To give some context, I try to do some light exercices, I eat okay, I brush my teeth and all each day, but that's all I can do. I can't read, listen to music : everything is too painful, too much.

 

I'm on sick leave for almost 2 years now. I have no friends since my mid-teen and I've never been romanticaly involved. I've been lonely all my life and always fought through my anxieties without much thoughts, thinking something was wrong with me and I had to hide it. I never understood I was different and sensible, and my family has been of no help but still I never thought of cutting ties and trying to help myself instead...

 

More information (I’m sorry, I should draw a timeline because the last months have been quite complex and intricate) : I got shingles 2 weeks prior to the hospital (light shingles : no pain, very small area), I called the suicide hotline, I went to the psych ER and got dismissed, saw my psychiatrist then another one. I was then in such a hypersensitivty state that I couldn’t take care of myself, couldn’t leave my house and was asking for help to die. That’s when my parents came to bring me to their home. The next morning I was desperate and asked to be driven to the hospital (big big mistake...). At that point, I was still able to sleep naturaly, stand upright without tachychardia... despite all my issues. 

 

 

11 hours ago, LotusRising said:

Did you feel stable on lexapro? 

I felt stable on Lexapro. I don't think it was very useful for me. I think I was misdiagnosed with depression instead of anxiety from the start and that some tools to cope would have been enough at the time (20 years ago, in my late teens).  

   

 

11 hours ago, LotusRising said:

Why were you switched to cymbalta?

 

Since the hospital, I'm so anxious, hopeless, on the verge and terrified when I wake up and then through the day (it diminishes a bit when the evening starts), that me and my parents were looking for ways to get new meds that would suit me better and help me. I was still/already suicidal and they don’t know how to manage all this. I saw their GP with them which suggested to see a psychiatrist and go to a private psy hospital.

 

We tried to avoid going back to the hospital (public or private) because my social anxiety and my hypersensitivity make it a nightmare and would worsen my state. So as my parents are housing me, I agreed to see a new psychiatrist. He changed my meds based on my genes screening (I did one two months ago : it showed I had a fast metabolism on Lexapro and that it would explained why it was useless from my POV but that I would metabolize Cymbalta okay). On a side note : that wonderful psychiatrist said he won't stop me if I wanted to die and even gave me advices on how to... 

 

 

11 hours ago, LotusRising said:

In your signature, you mention diazepam, alimemazine, ambien and zopiclone - which of these do you take daily?

Diazepam 5mg in the morning usually and Alimemazine 2,5mg in the evening (never took sleeping pills before all this)

 

 

Thanks for all the info, I will read them carefully. I wrote a lot, you'll have a lot to read too!  

   

Viinncceennt  

   

[Catina7]

Hi @Viinncceennt and welcome to SA!  I was the one who was communicating with you on Reddit.  I'm so glad they accepted you as a member!

 

Be patient as the moderators work to give you some helpful advice.  In the meantime, here is a link that discusses how we can deal with feelings of terror, panic, & anxiety:  

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/5213-sudden-fear-terror-panic-anxiety-or-sensory-overload-from-withdrawal/

 

We're all here to help and support you.  You are NEVER alone, always remember that!  

 

Catina ❤️

 

[Viinncceennt]

45 minutes ago, Catina7 said:

Hi @Viinncceennt and welcome to SA!  I was the one who was communicating with you on Reddit.  I'm so glad they accepted you as a member!

 

Be patient as the moderators work to give you some helpful advice.  In the meantime, here is a link that discusses how we can deal with feelings of terror, panic, & anxiety:  

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/5213-sudden-fear-terror-panic-anxiety-or-sensory-overload-from-withdrawal/

 

We're all here to help and support you.  You are NEVER alone, always remember that!  

 

Catina ❤️

 

Thanks Catina!

[LotusRising]

6 hours ago, Viinncceennt said:

I went back on my previous treatment with Lexapro 10mg shortly on the 3rd day at the hospital and for 1 month, and I didn't feel a single change during that time. 

It's possible that you didn't give yourself enough time to stabilize back on the lexapro. Was it at this time that you began switching to cymbalta?

 

6 hours ago, Viinncceennt said:

I've read many people getting permanent dysautonomia  because of high stress or medication : I think I'm one of them sadly.

I think most of feel we are the "worst" case when this happens, but truly, your situation does not sound unique. My dysautonomia symptoms came on almost overnight as well and were quite severe, but have slowly been getting better. This improvement didn't happen in a month though - it takes much longer than we like. There's every reason to believe that yours will also improve. 

 

6 hours ago, Viinncceennt said:

Diazepam 5mg in the morning usually and Alimemazine 2,5mg in the evening (never took sleeping pills before all this)

 

Since you have been on a benzo since the summer? it would be best to take the same dose at the same time every day, rather than sometimes taking one dose or another. Our nervous system really likes stability. Does the alimemazine help with sleep, because theoretically the diazepam should be helping with this. 

 

I think you said you switched to cymbalta 1 week ago. Is that correct?

 

[Viinncceennt]

34 minutes ago, LotusRising said:

It's possible that you didn't give yourself enough time to stabilize back on the lexapro. Was it at this time that you began switching to cymbalta?

After 1 month I switched back to Cymbalta, yes. I don't think so but I can be wrong.

 

35 minutes ago, LotusRising said:

I think most of feel we are the "worst" case when this happens, but truly, your situation does not sound unique. My dysautonomia symptoms came on almost overnight as well and were quite severe, but have slowly been getting better. This improvement didn't happen in a month though - it takes much longer than we like. There's every reason to believe that yours will also improve. 

That is true. It's just that it didn't happen from an "actual" withdrawal (I mean more than 2 days). But I know there have been people experiencing symptoms from just 1 dose as well.

 

I really lack optimism by nature, that is a fact. I don't want to bother you with more details than necessary : but since that day at the hospital and during those 2 months, I've really felt that my parasympathetic system completely disappeared from acting on specific organs and "vital" functions. I just wished I had, even just for 1 minute, my parasympathetic system taking over to reassure me.

 

But I'll try to keep your advices carefuly with me.

 

41 minutes ago, LotusRising said:

Since you have been on a benzo since the summer? it would be best to take the same dose at the same time every day, rather than sometimes taking one dose or another. Our nervous system really likes stability. Does the alimemazine help with sleep, because theoretically the diazepam should be helping with this. 

Yes, I've been on two different BZ since the summer : first oxazepam then diazepam. Diazepam is to help me avoid SI during the first part of the day : I've been taking it at the same time every morning for 4 days (before it was kinda erratic). I'm afraid of addiction (as being dependant on the drug) and even more of the other side of addiction (I don't know the right word for it : to become accustomed of the drug and needing higher doses for the same effects).

 

It's better than with oxazepam because I began to take higher doses and since its half-life is shorter, the crash was really hard.

 

Alimemazine helps the most with my sleep even if it's not perfect. Z-drugs were almost ineffective (4 hours of sleep on average) and diazepam did nothing, same for 50mg oxazepam. That's why I say the way the parasympatethic system is supposed to take over at night is totally gone for me. But alimemazine makes me sleep for 5/6 hours every time and at a low dose.

 

48 minutes ago, LotusRising said:

I think you said you switched to cymbalta 1 week ago. Is that correct?

Yes.

 

The last 7 days I've been on 60mg Cymbalta and the week before I was on 5mg Lexapro and 30mg Cymbalta.

 

Thanks again for your help.

 

Viinncceennt

 

[LotusRising]

Hi @Viinncceennt

 

If it were me, I would switch back to Lexapro, but I would be consistent with dosing of both lexapro and diazepam. It is likely you've incurred physiological dependence on the benzo since you've been on it for more than 2-4 weeks, which is a common timeframe for dependence to occur. Your body will need a good long hold if you are hoping for stabilization, and while you mention that you tried to stabilize for a month already, it's not uncommon for individuals to take longer. During this time, I would not make any changes and keep a consistent dosing schedule.

 

Please have a read again through the above links, they hold a lot of valuable information.

 

22 hours ago, Viinncceennt said:

I just wished I had, even just for 1 minute, my parasympathetic system taking over to reassure me.

 

I can't stress enough that this takes time. And much more time than we would like, but there is absolutely hope for a full return of your parasympathetic function. Lean in to your coping skills - for many of us, these become a lifeline. 

 

Please also reach out to other members - we have a great community here and it can be helpful to speak with others on the same journey. 

 

Again, welcome, and please reach out if you have questions  

[Viinncceennt]

Thanks a lot.

 

I will switched to Lexapro.

 

Diazepam doesn't seem to be useful anymore (5mg a day). I should still stick to it in order to stabilize ?

 

Viinncceennt

[Catina7]

3 hours ago, Viinncceennt said:

I will switched to Lexapro.

 

I'm so happy that you received some guidance on this @Viinncceennt!  Hang tight while they work to answer the question about the Diazepam.  I'm sure we can get you stabilized soon!

 

Warmly,

Catina 🤗

[Viinncceennt]

Thanks Catina, for this and for your help to make my way in here! 🤗

[RachelSusan]

@Viinncceennt I wanted to say hello and welcome to the group.  With the help of people here I was able to stabilize and eventually get off the antidepressant.  I know you are going through a difficult time but as you start to stabilize the symptoms will slowly start to clear up. 

[Viinncceennt]

Another question : if I had stayed on Cymbalta, could I still get WD symptoms from Lexapro since I would have technicaly stopped it CT ? Or would Cymbalta have take over ?

 

Thanks.

[LotusRising]

On 11/24/2023 at 7:07 AM, Viinncceennt said:

Diazepam doesn't seem to be useful anymore (5mg a day). I should still stick to it in order to stabilize ?

From your signature, it looks as though you've been on a benzo since the summer? Is that correct? Although it may not feel it's helping, you could still be dealing with physiological dependence. We also don't recommend making any changes while you're trying to stabilize, since this could upset your nervous system further.

 

5 hours ago, Viinncceennt said:

if I had stayed on Cymbalta, could I still get WD symptoms from Lexapro since I would have technicaly stopped it CT ? Or would Cymbalta have take over

Yes, I think this is could happen because they are also two different drug classes. 

 

How are you doing?

[Viinncceennt]

Thanks for your answer.

 

I've been taking Oxazepam on and off since this summer until 7th November. But I've been on Diazepam only since November 8th.

 

I'm doing as usual. Nothing as changed so far and it will be 3 months in 2 days since my hospital stay and the emergence of my symptoms.

 

Viinncceennt

[Viinncceennt]

I've tried to make a visual summary in the file attached.

 

- yellow cells : days with no Lexapro

- red cell : appearance of symptoms

- blue cells : switching from Cymbalta to Lexapro (and from Lexapro to Cymbalta)

 

I had not a single change in symptoms since the 28th of September. Even in early November when I switched to diazepam (from oxazepam) and cymbalta (from lexapro), I didn't feel a difference in my symptoms (no WD, no positive effects...).

 

The lights switched on the 28th of September and ever since : I can't sleep, I have my dysautonomia/cardiac symptoms (POTS, no vagal tone), anhedonia, despair...

 

I hope it's a bit clearer than my overloaded signature.

Summary.xlsx

[LotusRising]

12 hours ago, Viinncceennt said:

I've been taking Oxazepam on and off since this summer until 7th November

What is on and off? How often each week were you taking it?

[Viinncceennt]

August - September : 0 (most of the time), 10, 20 or 30mg

October : 0, 25 (most of the time), 50 or 75mg (happened 2 or 3 times)

 

I was told to use them at will whenever I felt anxious.

[LotusRising]

15 hours ago, Viinncceennt said:

August - September : 0 (most of the time), 10, 20 or 30mg

 

Hi @Viinncceennt, sorry I don't understand what you mean here. What is the 10, 20 or 30mg. And what is 0 most of the time? 1 time/week, 2 times/wk, everyday? On the days you took it, did you only take it once/day? And beginning of October - present, is it my understanding you've taken it most days?

 

Is the diazepam helping you sleep?

[Viinncceennt]

I meant that I was not taking it regularly. Doctors prescribed it to me to use them when feeling anxious. Some days I didn't need them (so I took none most of the time) and others I did (sometimes 10mg, 20mg or 30mg). That's what I was trying to show.

 

The day I took it, it was usually once a day, in the morning or early afternoon.

 

I didn't take diazepam for sleep but it didn't make me sleepy a single time. I use alimemazine for sleep.

 

 

[Viinncceennt]

A quick update :

 

1) I've been taking diazepam since the 7th of November (32 x 5mg pills in total). I've switched to 2.5mg a day in the morning instead of 5mg : it's been 4 days so far and I haven't felt a single difference (bad or good). I'll do it until Sunday morning and see how it goes.

 

2) Alimemazine doesn't help me to sleep anymore. I've taken it 22 times so far (2,5mg pills : lowest dose). I've been sleeping extremely poorly at best since the appearance of my symptoms (29th of September). Z-drugs didn't help either (2 to 6 hours at best) and I don't want to get hooked up on them especially if they're not efficient for me. Alimemazine is an anti-histaminic but also a neuroleptic so I'd like not to depend on it. I've tried doxylamine yesterday which is also an anti-H1 but without neuroleptic effects : same (low) effect as alimemazine on my sleep.

 

3) I wanna try to see if I still get total insomnia without pills. I'll see how it goes and I'll decide what to do next.

 

4) I've ordered fish oil and magnesium under the guidelines of SA dedicated threads. I'll keep you up to date on this.

 

I've run an extensive control on drugs.com for any interaction between my meds and supplements : everything is clean.

 

----

 

For what's left :

 

It's been 10 weeks since my adverse effect to a sudden switch in my meds (along with high stress) : nothing has changed so far as far as I can tell.

 

I'm still doing the CHOP protocol which is a workout program designed for POTS/dysautonomia patients : it's getting harder as I feel no motivation, no will... for anything and no reward or pleasure as well. It's gradual and it consists of 5 workouts a week (3 cardio/2 strength).

 

I'm managing my overeating (only thing which is bringing me some kind of "pleasure" but it feels more like something to do distract my mind...) as best as I can : I'm still below the 10lb gain limit. I wish I was better at this but I'm craving any kind of food except fruits and vegetables all of the time. Before all this I was eating very healthy and it was easy for me to manage it but I don't have it in me anymore. I am very tall and I was skinny but fit before.

 

I have a cardiologist appointment (I don't know when yet) for a stress test and a 24-hour holter. It's the only practitioner appt I have scheduled since my parents kinda made me comply to it. Since the internist, neurologist, cardiologist, GP... all said it was in my head, I don't want to face this again right now so I have no next step regarding my dysautonomia/POTS symptoms.

 

I wanted to see a psychologist to talk about my SI and the pain and distress that has been my life so far. But again, I've been down that road already and I don't have it in me to be gaslighted and dismissed again.

 

The only thing I was down for was to see a reflexologist but even that is too hard for me : I haven't left the house in many days (weeks?). I have lost the track of time. My day consists of laying mostly, eating with my parents and doing my 30-minute workout. That's pretty much it.

 

So yes, I'm still very desperate and still think I'm doomed. I will probably try everything I can if I regain some willpower : endocrinologist, brain MRI and EEG, nutritionist, chinese medecine, dysautonomia specialists (three-legged sheeps around here) and whatnot.

 

PS : I track everything on a dedicated spreadsheet : weight, water intake, meds and supplements, BM, HR...

 

Well, I wasn't expecting it to be a long post at first but here we are. 😏

 

Wish you all a nice weekend.

 

Viinncceennt

[Catina7]

Hi @Viinncceennt... thanks for the update.  Considering everything you're dealing with, you're doing a great job with tracking your progress and trying to make some changes to see if they help.  Sorting out these drug messes can take a long time, so continue to be patient.

 

Forgive me if you've already covered this, but are your parents supportive and do they understand what's going on?

 

Yes, if you can muster the willpower to do it, then by all means consider some alternative treatments for yourself.  Some people have found acupuncture to be a big help.  

 

You are welcome to write as much as you want to keep us updated or to express yourself.  The most important thing is for you to feel supported and understood, which I hope you feel from us here at SA.  I'm sure one of the moderators will interject their thoughts as well. 

 

Hang in there friend!  🥰

[LotusRising]

Hi @Viinncceennt,

 

Thanks for the update. It certainly sounds like you've been thinking about all of this a lot!

 

3 hours ago, Viinncceennt said:

I've been taking diazepam since the 7th of November (32 x 5mg pills in total). I've switched to 2.5mg a day in the morning instead of 5mg : it's been 4 days so far and I haven't felt a single difference (bad or good). I'll do it until Sunday morning and see how it goes.

 

I just want to caution you that with the long half-life of diazepam, it's easy for cuts to get away from you, and you may not feel any changes from a reduction for at least 10 days. For this reason, you may want to wait at least two weeks to see how you feel before making a reduction. Since you've not been on it a long time, it may be that you can come off quicker and easier, which I'm hoping for you.

 

3 hours ago, Viinncceennt said:

I've tried doxylamine yesterday which is also an anti-H1 but without neuroleptic effects : same (low) effect as alimemazine on my sleep.

 

So, it sounds like you are stopping the alimemazine as well?

 

3 hours ago, Viinncceennt said:

3) I wanna try to see if I still get total insomnia without pills. I'll see how it goes and I'll decide what to do next.

 

I want to mention that this is a lot of changes all at one time for your nervous system. Please understand that this can be destabilizing, and our recommendations are that you make only one change at a time. Please review Keep it simple, slow and stable. If your plan is to eliminate both the alimemazine and the diazepam, I would definitely give your body a good long hold of at least one month to allow for stabilization. 

 

Please keep us updated! 

[Viinncceennt]

Just now, LotusRising said:

I just want to caution you that with the long half-life of diazepam, it's easy for cuts to get away from you, and you may not feel any changes from a reduction for at least 10 days. For this reason, you may want to wait at least two weeks to see how you feel before making a reduction. Since you've not been on it a long time, it may be that you can come off quicker and easier, which I'm hoping for you.

 

Oh thank you, I forgot about that ! I will maybe stay on this 2,5mg dose a bit longer then.

 

1 minute ago, LotusRising said:

So, it sounds like you are stopping the alimemazine as well?

2 minutes ago, LotusRising said:

I want to mention that this is a lot of changes all at one time for your nervous system.

Well, you are right. I will focus on diazepam for the next 2 weeks. I'll decide later what I can do about alimemazine.

 

Thanks @LotusRising, I'll keep you updated !

[Emonda]

How are you doing, @Viinncceennt?

[Viinncceennt]

@Emonda : thanks for reaching out.

 

I'm doing really bad. No changes at all in my symptoms or to be more accurate, many of them have worsened and new ones appeared. I'm currently developping some kind of akathasia (I had a mild form since the beginning but I didn't realise what it was until it worsened and I looked more into it), some dysautonomia symptoms have worsened as well and I have full blown PSSD.

 

I have trouble just existing now : each second is full of terror, restlessness and so on. I can't leave the house, go to medical appointments. I can't sleep or relax, I can't do relaxation exercices, I can't read, paint, write, watch TV or contemplate my surroundings. My parents are taking care of me but it's a very fragile situation.

 

I have WD from Diazepam (I'll have to update my signature) and I'm only on Lexapro 10mg, just like I was before everything happened.

 

I am still taking Magnesium and I have added Omega 3. I'm not sure about the effects : maybe Magnesium helped a bit about my parasthesia. I have introduced probiotics as well recently. I have to add electrolytes for my POTS as well. I know we should experiment one thing at a time and start with a small introducing dose.

 

I'd like to make some change in my diet but I'm not sure what to do exactly yet. I have seen so many contradictory diet advises : one for POTS and dysautonomia, one for akathisia, one for PSSD... I will start with lowering sugar, carboydrates and process food, eventhough I'm eating quite healthy to be honest.

 

Viinncceennt

[Catina7]

Hey @Viinncceennt, I'm sorry you're still not doing very well.  Yes, definitely update your signature to reflect your recent med changes.

 

I think starting with the dietary changes you mentioned is a good start.  And you're not consuming any caffeine, correct?

[Viinncceennt]

Yes, coffee is a thing from the past.

[Emonda]

Sorry to hear things haven't been great, @Viinncceennt

 

11 hours ago, Viinncceennt said:

My parents are taking care of me

 

It's wonderful that your parents can care for you while you recover.

 

As Lotusrising mentioned, WD symptoms from a rapid benzo taper can be unpleasant, and it will take time to recover. 

 

Can you confirm that your signature is now up-to-date, and you've held the other meds at the same dose? I wouldn't be making any changes until things improve.

 

You will improve...time and continued patience.

 

Emonda

[Viinncceennt]

Yes, it's up to date.

[LotusRising]

On 12/1/2023 at 10:04 AM, Viinncceennt said:

I've switched to 2.5mg a day in the morning instead of 5mg

 

This was a 50% drop in your dose. Just a reminder that we recommend no more than 10% per month of your previous dose. See Why taper by 10%

 

How have your symptoms been since this reduction?

[Viinncceennt]

But I've just used it for less than 4 weeks. And it never brought me any relief, just like my GABA is destroyed.

 

As far as symptoms go, no change at all so far. I just realized that I was suffering from akathisia without realizing it since I had those 2 Risperidone pills. And it's probably the worse of all I'm dealing with (and the hardest to describe and share...).

 

 

[LotusRising]

35 minutes ago, Viinncceennt said:

But I've just used it for less than 4 weeks

 

Right, but since you were taking it sporadically for a month prior to your daily use of diazepam, you would have already started to develop physiological adaptations to the benzo. I experienced a similar situation where I was taking it as needed, and then started taking it daily to compensate for WD symptoms from another drug. I had an incredibly difficult taper, and only want to make sure you're aware and are careful with your taper. I wouldn't want anyone to repeat my experience, though it's also important to point out that I did have a prior history with benzos so my situation is different.

 

46 minutes ago, Viinncceennt said:

just like my GABA is destroyed.

 

Your gaba isn't destroyed. Your receptors just need to upregulate, which they will, in time. 

 

47 minutes ago, Viinncceennt said:

As far as symptoms go, no change at all so far.

 

This is good! 👍

[Viinncceennt]

17 hours ago, LotusRising said:

18 hours ago, Viinncceennt said:

As far as symptoms go, no change at all so far.

 

This is good! 👍

I mean they are still horrific and haven't improved.

 

17 hours ago, LotusRising said:

Right, but since you were taking it sporadically for a month prior to your daily use of diazepam

Actually I just took them sporadicly for 1 month. And I was using sporadicly Oxazepam before that.

[Viinncceennt]

18 hours ago, LotusRising said:

Your gaba isn't destroyed. Your receptors just need to upregulate, which they will, in time. 

I say this because none of the BZ I've taken since this summer have had any effect on me. Z-drugs didn't make me sleep. 

[LotusRising]

On 12/1/2023 at 10:04 AM, Viinncceennt said:

I've been taking diazepam since the 7th of November (32 x 5mg pills in total).

Okay, you mentioned this back on Dec 1, which I guess I incorrectly misinterpreted as daily.

 

On 12/25/2023 at 3:13 AM, Viinncceennt said:

I mean they are still horrific and haven't improved.

Yes, but you didn't get an increase in symptoms from dropping your diazepam dose, which is good. What date did you do that?