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Have you recovered from being on antidepressants long term and/or high dose?


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If you were able to successfully wean yourself off of antidepressants after 10 years or more, please tell me a short version of your story or provide a link to your Intro topic. Thanks! 

 

 

2005-2008: Effexor; 1/2008 Tapered 3 months, then quit. 7/2008-2009 Reinstated Effexor (crying spells at start of new job.)
2009-3/2013: Switched to Pristiq 50 mg then 100 mg
3/2013: Switched to Lexapro 10mg. Cut down to 5 mg. CT for 2 weeks then reinstated for 6 weeks
8/2013-8/2014: Tapering Lexapro (Lots of withdrawal symptoms)
11/2014 -8/2015: Developed severe insomnia and uncontrollable daily crying spells
12/2014-6/2015: Tried Ambien, Klonopin,Ativan, Lunesta, Sonata, Trazadone, Seroquel, Rameron, Gabapentin - Developed Anxiety disorder, PTSD, and Psychogenic Myoclonus
7/2015-1/2016: Reinstated Lexapro 2 mg (mild improvement, but crying spells still present)

1/2016-5/2017: Lexapro 5 mg ( helped a lot, but poor stress tolerance & depressive episodes)

5/20/2017 - Raised dose to Lexapro 10 mg due to lingering depression(Total of 2 failed tapers & severe PAWS)

9/11/2018 - Present: Still on 10 mg Lexapro and mostly recovered.(Extremely sensitive to stress which triggers Myoclonus.)

Intro page: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4149-lilu-depression-worsened-by-meds/

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My massive reply. I am so sorry. Now I've come from the end of this I can see how much pain I still have regarding all the years past. I'm certainly not living in the past and I'm so grateful we are a

Frances72

My mum now aged 65 came off of her SSLR meds after 20+ years. She has been completely off medication (and thats ALL meds, mum takes no pharmaceuticals at all) for 3 years now and doing very well. She is very independent, gets around and is an active grand mother. The first 1.5 years were tough but there was a lot of fear because we didn't know what was happening to her and it took a while to find the right information and create a support group. Fear is everyones worst enemy. On a positive, soon after mums last med, she became connected and feeling powerful emotions that she loved. She felt more alive than she ever remembered and loved the feeling. I could feel her connection too. So even in the first 1.5 years being very tough, there were lots of wonderful windows keeping my mum going and hopeful. 

* January 2015 I'm supporting my mum age 63 through withdrawal. She has moved in with me and my family, cannot be alone or look after herself. Suicidal episodes, exhausted but unable to sit still, severe anxiety on an off, chronic diarrhoea and digestive issues, fear and gloom, very thin.

*1996 (?) Zoloft (minimum dose) for 15 years, minus 2 to 3 separate years that were attempted unsuccessful WDrawal.

*2010 Lexapro minimum dose for the past 4 years.

*Reduced Lexapro Oct 2013 (minimum dose) by skipping days over a 7 month period. Last med taken end of April 2014, 9 months ago. NO other meds. Initial diet was GAPS eased into a mostly Weston A Price Foundation diet. Supplement with wild fish oil, coconut oil, St Mary's thistle, 5 ml whisky/30 ml water (in emergencies), kefir, gelatine drinks and probiotics.

Aug 3 2015 update. Doing much better, still thin and poor appetite. Discovered decay in an old root canal filling. Removal in one week. Root canals are dangerous as they support pathogenic bacteria some of which are attracted to the brain. 

UPDATE May 2016 Mum's been living on her own in our country home since August 2015! This is huge considering its a big old house on a bush property with no close neighbours. Mum is doing very well, enjoying food and friends. She is now making plans to buy a home back in her own home community near her friends and family. Mum continues to pay attention to eating good wholesome foods and connecting with loved ones. Mum continues fortnightly psychotherapy with a private female therapist who doesn't support drug use. 

 

 

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I was on them for about 10 years, I'm finally off...Praise the Lord...Look up "Chicken" in the introductions.

Prozac 1999-2009 quit semi cold turkey.

 

2012 Placed on Seroquel 25 mg, Tranxene (Clorezepate) 3.75 mg 3x a day, Remeron 30 mg for anxiety/akathesia.

 

Weaned off Seroquel and Tranxene .to Remeron 15 Mg.

In May 2014 tried quitting Remeron at its lowest dose. Had severe withdrawals.Reinstated Remeron at 30 mg by doctor. August 5 2014 entered hospital. Doctor pulled the Remeron and bridged it to Pamelor (Nortriptyline) 40mg and Zyprexa 2.5mg.After removing the Remeron all my bad symptoms went away and I am stable.

 

9/11/14 - 7.5 mg tranxene, 40mg Pamelor, Zyprexa 2.5mg

12/29/14 -  20mg Pamelor, 1/6/15,  7/31/15 3.5mg, 8/10/15 3.2 mg, 9/15/15 2.2mg, 10/15/15 1.8mg

(Feb 2016 - 1.4mg Pamelor only -  OFF OF TRANXENE AND ZYPREXA SINCE DEC 2014 BENZO FREE Since 2014. Nortrityline (Pamelor) .8mg Aug 2016

March 2017 DRUG FREE

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My mum now aged 65 came off of her SSLR meds after 20+ years. She has been completely off medication (and thats ALL meds, mum takes no pharmaceuticals at all) for 3 years now and doing very well. She is very independent, gets around and is an active grand mother. The first 1.5 years were tough but there was a lot of fear because we didn't know what was happening to her and it took a while to find the right information and create a support group. Fear is everyones worst enemy. On a positive, soon after mums last med, she became connected and feeling powerful emotions that she loved. She felt more alive than she ever remembered and loved the feeling. I could feel her connection too. So even in the first 1.5 years being very tough, there were lots of wonderful windows keeping my mum going and hopeful. 

 

Why was your mum put on antidepressants in the first place?

2005-2008: Effexor; 1/2008 Tapered 3 months, then quit. 7/2008-2009 Reinstated Effexor (crying spells at start of new job.)
2009-3/2013: Switched to Pristiq 50 mg then 100 mg
3/2013: Switched to Lexapro 10mg. Cut down to 5 mg. CT for 2 weeks then reinstated for 6 weeks
8/2013-8/2014: Tapering Lexapro (Lots of withdrawal symptoms)
11/2014 -8/2015: Developed severe insomnia and uncontrollable daily crying spells
12/2014-6/2015: Tried Ambien, Klonopin,Ativan, Lunesta, Sonata, Trazadone, Seroquel, Rameron, Gabapentin - Developed Anxiety disorder, PTSD, and Psychogenic Myoclonus
7/2015-1/2016: Reinstated Lexapro 2 mg (mild improvement, but crying spells still present)

1/2016-5/2017: Lexapro 5 mg ( helped a lot, but poor stress tolerance & depressive episodes)

5/20/2017 - Raised dose to Lexapro 10 mg due to lingering depression(Total of 2 failed tapers & severe PAWS)

9/11/2018 - Present: Still on 10 mg Lexapro and mostly recovered.(Extremely sensitive to stress which triggers Myoclonus.)

Intro page: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4149-lilu-depression-worsened-by-meds/

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I'm on my way to recovering from double that  : 20 years. It's a work in progress. :)

Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014

 

                                                  Psych Drug - free since May 2014
.
         

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  • Mentor

I've been on them for 20 years. I'm now down to the 7's on lexapro. I was only supposed to be on them a short while, when I was going through my divorce. No dr ever took me off. They all thought I was living life so well, they all left me alone.

 

I know I'm not off, but I look back at where I was all those years, and I'm having W/D symptoms, can't be helped, but I'm making progress everyday. :)

 

My dr did tell me a couple of weeks ago, skip the 7's, go down to 5 and take the anti nausea meds I gave you. I told him I don't think so...

 

I have been nauseous everyday since June, 2016, except for 2 months, and a few weeks here and there. But I'm better today than yesterday. And I'll be better tomorrow that today.

 

And it won't be too much longer and I can say I'm off. I'm taking it nice and slow and watching out for the bumps in the road. Hopefully, if everything goes the way it should, I'll be off of them this time next year.

 

You probably didn't want to hear this, but not everyone is off meds. That's why we are here, to get the best help ever!

 

Thanks to all the caring mods. They are going through what I'm going through, but have the time to help us!!

 

Take care,

Frogie xx

PREVIOUS medications and discontinuations: Have been on medications since 1996. 

 Valium, Gabapentin, Lamictal and Prilosec from 2000 to 2015 with a fast taper by a psychiatrist.

 Liquid Lexapro Nov, 2016 to 31-March, 2019 Lexapro free!!! (total Lexapro taper was 4 years-started with pill form)

---CURRENT MEDICATIONS:Supplements:Milk Thistle, Metamucil, Magnesium Citrate, Vitamin D3, Levothyroxine

 Xanax 1mg three times a day June, 2000 to 19-September, 2020 Went from .150 grams (average weight of 1 Xanax) three times a day to .003 grams three times a day.

19-September, 2020 Xanax free!!! (total Xanax taper was 15-1/2 months-1-June, 2019-19-September, 2020)

 

 

I am not a medical professional. The suggestions I make are based on personal experience.

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Frances72

 

 

 

Why was your mum put on antidepressants in the first place?

 

My massive reply. I am so sorry. Now I've come from the end of this I can see how much pain I still have regarding all the years past. I'm certainly not living in the past and I'm so grateful we are at the other end. Writing this did take me back so please forgive some of the anger and frustration at my mothers OLD (never to see again) doctor. 

 

I have since found out more of Mum's story. My mum, like many people in this world suffered trauma as a child. Living in Malta with parents who were struggling and no divorce allowed because the country was very Catholic. Spending lot of time living in a convent. Thinking they could make a better life, my Granddad decided to move the family to Australia. He came here alone to set up a home. Once he was working full time and found a good home he sent for his 4 children and wife. My grandmother (mum's mother) was in a long term relationship with another man, popped her 4 children on the plane and stayed in Malta. My mum was the oldest at age 16, the youngest was my uncle aged 9. Once in Australia you could not return to Malta or leave Australia for 2 years. My Granddad was a wonderful father and did the best he could. He was very religious. He told the children that when they were asked where their mother was to tell people she was dead. Catholicism has a lot to answer for. None of this suffering needed to happen, in my opinion, it happened because they were not allowed to divorce. Mum met dad and was married by 19. Dad was not interested in moving to Malta so mum made the most of it but it was tough. Mum had 4 children of her own, not exactly planned but all of us wanted. It was tough raising kids in a completely new country, away from your mother with a husband who was rarely around. Our home town was very racist, we all struggled at school and because of this it effected our behaviour at home. I didn't realise until recently but mum had been put on several types of benzo meds, one was Muralax (can't remember exact spelling) and serapax for short periods of time. At one time my mum was going to tranx anonymous with her sister who was also coming off valium for support in coming off these meds. She managed even though dad was never around, always at work doing overtime etc and with 4 children, two of whom were difficult. 41-42 mum had a break down. I was not living at home anymore so I didn't see the lead up. Mum explained that dad had been doing nightshift and there was a guy living in the street playing with our huge solid metal gate at night. Mum was in high anxiety, didn't want to tell anyone because she didn't want there to be trouble. I imagine I don't know the whole story but I can see how my mum lost it. Her sociopathic doctor, diagnosed her with a chemical brain imbalance causing her anxiety and depression and put her on a strong dosage of murelax, after giving her a shot of valium (I think). Mum was off her face most of a year and it was a night mare for her to come off. Mum stablized on an SSLR being Zoloft during her withdrawal off the benzo and never touched anything else (except zoloft and then lexapro) ever again, even when she was told she needed lithium 10 years later to help with her compulsive on the side addiction. This started when mum was 41-42 and her last SSLR was age 62. Over 20 years on SSLR's. 

People have no power, they've given it away to doctors. We are a close family there was enough support to help my mother. I should have been called before mum was shot up with valium, I would have moved back home and prevented the disconnection and suffering that was to follow. I didn't know much back then, I was only 21-22 but what I did know was that the brain imbalance theory was wrong and made no sense and my mum should not be on meds. 1 year into mum's withdrawal, in the thick of it, feeling there was no choice and a heap of pressure from everyone, I went with mum to see her doctor.. I would not let her go alone. Thank Goddess it was an OK day (had it not been I wouldn't have let her go) and we were with this doc 40 minutes. The experience was disturbing. He told mum she would die from her depression. He said there was no way she was suffering withdrawals because these meds are not addictive. He looked up Dr Breggins on the computer and tried to put us off by spinning a bunch of nonsense (he likely believed to be true on some special webpage for doctors that carefully smears all doctors that go against the big pharma agenda) about Dr Breggins being a Scientologist. Nothing he said related or answered my questions in regards to mum. He went on and on about Scientology. My mum was crying so much. She was a mess. He was very condescending.

 

Its all great now though. I know that these meds are often prescribed way too easily. In mums case she needed support and for what was happening to her to stop. She needed to sleep. She needed help not meds. People need help from other people, not meds. Before meds people suffered trauma, moved through with help and became stronger and better more empathic people. 

* January 2015 I'm supporting my mum age 63 through withdrawal. She has moved in with me and my family, cannot be alone or look after herself. Suicidal episodes, exhausted but unable to sit still, severe anxiety on an off, chronic diarrhoea and digestive issues, fear and gloom, very thin.

*1996 (?) Zoloft (minimum dose) for 15 years, minus 2 to 3 separate years that were attempted unsuccessful WDrawal.

*2010 Lexapro minimum dose for the past 4 years.

*Reduced Lexapro Oct 2013 (minimum dose) by skipping days over a 7 month period. Last med taken end of April 2014, 9 months ago. NO other meds. Initial diet was GAPS eased into a mostly Weston A Price Foundation diet. Supplement with wild fish oil, coconut oil, St Mary's thistle, 5 ml whisky/30 ml water (in emergencies), kefir, gelatine drinks and probiotics.

Aug 3 2015 update. Doing much better, still thin and poor appetite. Discovered decay in an old root canal filling. Removal in one week. Root canals are dangerous as they support pathogenic bacteria some of which are attracted to the brain. 

UPDATE May 2016 Mum's been living on her own in our country home since August 2015! This is huge considering its a big old house on a bush property with no close neighbours. Mum is doing very well, enjoying food and friends. She is now making plans to buy a home back in her own home community near her friends and family. Mum continues to pay attention to eating good wholesome foods and connecting with loved ones. Mum continues fortnightly psychotherapy with a private female therapist who doesn't support drug use. 

 

 

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My massive reply. I am so sorry. Now I've come from the end of this I can see how much pain I still have regarding all the years past. I'm certainly not living in the past and I'm so grateful we are at the other end. Writing this did take me back so please forgive some of the anger and frustration at my mothers OLD (never to see again) doctor. 

 

Why was your mum put on antidepressants in the first place?

 

Yeah, the circumstances of people who get put on psychotropic drugs are sometimes quite complex, as in your mom's case.  It's amazing that she recovered after being on all those drugs for so long. It definitely gives me hope that this maybe possible for me one day. Incidently, why do you refer to SSRI's as SSLR's - what does that stand for?

2005-2008: Effexor; 1/2008 Tapered 3 months, then quit. 7/2008-2009 Reinstated Effexor (crying spells at start of new job.)
2009-3/2013: Switched to Pristiq 50 mg then 100 mg
3/2013: Switched to Lexapro 10mg. Cut down to 5 mg. CT for 2 weeks then reinstated for 6 weeks
8/2013-8/2014: Tapering Lexapro (Lots of withdrawal symptoms)
11/2014 -8/2015: Developed severe insomnia and uncontrollable daily crying spells
12/2014-6/2015: Tried Ambien, Klonopin,Ativan, Lunesta, Sonata, Trazadone, Seroquel, Rameron, Gabapentin - Developed Anxiety disorder, PTSD, and Psychogenic Myoclonus
7/2015-1/2016: Reinstated Lexapro 2 mg (mild improvement, but crying spells still present)

1/2016-5/2017: Lexapro 5 mg ( helped a lot, but poor stress tolerance & depressive episodes)

5/20/2017 - Raised dose to Lexapro 10 mg due to lingering depression(Total of 2 failed tapers & severe PAWS)

9/11/2018 - Present: Still on 10 mg Lexapro and mostly recovered.(Extremely sensitive to stress which triggers Myoclonus.)

Intro page: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4149-lilu-depression-worsened-by-meds/

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MaryDavid

Yes I was on antidepressants and anti anxiety for between 12-14 years. I have been medication free since July 2015.

In 2001 - started on Carbamezapine (can't remember dose), Fluoexitine 20mg, Clanozepam (low dose) after a nervous breakdown.

In 2004 - abruptly stopped carbamezapine after falling pregnant.  

In 2009 - changed from Fluoexitine to Citalopram 20mg.

In 2014 - tappered off clanozepam.

In Aug 2015 - cold turkey off Citalopram :o

From Aug - Dec 2015 I had mostly flu-like symptoms and trouble sleeping. From Jan - April 2016 Emotional nightmare ensued, paranoia, excessive anxiety and tormenting thoughts, basically trying to manage these emotions and thoughts which are exhausting.  Lots of intense emotions followed by tears, at times howling when Im alone.In March 2016 I tried Choline & Inisitol, Vit B Complex, Using Aromatherapy, like Lavendar, Clary Sage and others.

In April STOPPED Choline & Inositol as I beleive it was giving me shakes and making me more anxious.  It also made me feel like i'd taken a benzo tablet making me feel sedated.  Reading - The Body Keeps Score by Bessel Van Der Kolk (recommended by a member on this group).

Symptoms - extreme low self esteem and insecurity, intense emotions and tearfulness. This is so so hard.  But im going to keep pushing.  Feel bad for my 2 girls and husband.  I don't want to be seen in this way, especially by the girls. Self-help : praying, meditating, breathing exercises and physical exercises.

Ceterizine (antihistamine) - I've been taking this for many years now for itchiness in my palms and feet.  I take them as and when I need them. JULY 2016 Dr Bach homeopathic remedies and 'rescue remedy'

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Yes I was on antidepressants and anti anxiety for between 12-14 years. I have been medication free since July 2015.

 

Do you feel completely healed Mary? At what point (length of time) did you feel healed?

Paxil 20mg started around 2013 dropped to 10 mg at some point dropped to 5mg for 1 week then C/T August 2016.

 

Buspar 10 mg 2x daily started 2013 fluctuating amounts in the past 8 months currently on 25mg daily still currently taking. Wanting to taper soon.

 

Tried cylexa 1 week at beginning of August 2016.

Tried wellbutrin 1 week after cylexa stopped both.

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keepinghope

I was on Prozac for 13 years, from 2002 - August 2015. I'm nowhere near healed. I can function and work full-time, but it's an uphill struggle. I think it takes longer to heal the longer you've been on SSRIs, but I'm hopeful it will happen eventually. 

2002 - Prescribed fluoxetine 20mg for mild situational depression and anxiety. Over the years also briefly swapped about on citalopram, sertraline and venlafaxine during poop out. 2012 - Cold turkeyed fluoxetine. Within 3 months was suffering from aggression, anxiety, panic attacks and paranoia. GP put me back on tablets as I was 'relapsing'. I didn't know anything about WD then. Jul 15 - Wanted to quit fluoxetine again so tapered off (skipping doses) over 6 weeks under advice of GP. Aug 15 - Last fluoxetine dose end of August 2015. Dec 15 - Had my first real crash after discontinuing. Found this site. Aug-Dec 16 - Signed off work because of a herniated disc & severe sciatica. Prescribed diazepam (took for 6 days and got WD symptoms on stopping; nausea, morning cortisol spikes, anxiety, anger) and codeine which I was on for 4 mths. Can confirm - opiate WD is nasty but nowhere near as bad or prolonged as SSRI WD!
Withdrawal symptoms have included: extreme anger and irritability, lethargy, depression and weepiness, anxiety, stomach upsets, loss of appetite, excessive sweating, muscle and back pain, insomnia, cortisol surges, akathisia, inability to cope with stress.
Things that help: herbal tinctures (rose, lemon balm, chamomile and skullcap), seaweed baths & epsom salt baths, fish oil and magnesium.

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If you were able to successfully wean yourself off of antidepressants after 10 years or more, please tell me a short version of your story or provide a link to your Intro topic. Thanks! 

Please add how long it took you to feel normal again after completely stopping the medication, whether tapered or cold turkey. And why did you decide to go off your meds to begin with?

2005-2008: Effexor; 1/2008 Tapered 3 months, then quit. 7/2008-2009 Reinstated Effexor (crying spells at start of new job.)
2009-3/2013: Switched to Pristiq 50 mg then 100 mg
3/2013: Switched to Lexapro 10mg. Cut down to 5 mg. CT for 2 weeks then reinstated for 6 weeks
8/2013-8/2014: Tapering Lexapro (Lots of withdrawal symptoms)
11/2014 -8/2015: Developed severe insomnia and uncontrollable daily crying spells
12/2014-6/2015: Tried Ambien, Klonopin,Ativan, Lunesta, Sonata, Trazadone, Seroquel, Rameron, Gabapentin - Developed Anxiety disorder, PTSD, and Psychogenic Myoclonus
7/2015-1/2016: Reinstated Lexapro 2 mg (mild improvement, but crying spells still present)

1/2016-5/2017: Lexapro 5 mg ( helped a lot, but poor stress tolerance & depressive episodes)

5/20/2017 - Raised dose to Lexapro 10 mg due to lingering depression(Total of 2 failed tapers & severe PAWS)

9/11/2018 - Present: Still on 10 mg Lexapro and mostly recovered.(Extremely sensitive to stress which triggers Myoclonus.)

Intro page: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4149-lilu-depression-worsened-by-meds/

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Pennylane34

I was on them for the better part of 12 years- between 1999 and 2011.  I am (almost) fully recovered.  My physical symptoms now are a breeze compared to 2011, 2012 & 2013.

 

<3

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Frances72

Yeah, the circumstances of people who get put on psychotropic drugs are sometimes quite complex, as in your mom's case.  It's amazing that she recovered after being on all those drugs for so long. It definitely gives me hope that this maybe possible for me one day. Incidently, why do you refer to SSRI's as SSLR's - what does that stand for?

 

 

 

I meant SSLR's the other was a spelling mistake. 

* January 2015 I'm supporting my mum age 63 through withdrawal. She has moved in with me and my family, cannot be alone or look after herself. Suicidal episodes, exhausted but unable to sit still, severe anxiety on an off, chronic diarrhoea and digestive issues, fear and gloom, very thin.

*1996 (?) Zoloft (minimum dose) for 15 years, minus 2 to 3 separate years that were attempted unsuccessful WDrawal.

*2010 Lexapro minimum dose for the past 4 years.

*Reduced Lexapro Oct 2013 (minimum dose) by skipping days over a 7 month period. Last med taken end of April 2014, 9 months ago. NO other meds. Initial diet was GAPS eased into a mostly Weston A Price Foundation diet. Supplement with wild fish oil, coconut oil, St Mary's thistle, 5 ml whisky/30 ml water (in emergencies), kefir, gelatine drinks and probiotics.

Aug 3 2015 update. Doing much better, still thin and poor appetite. Discovered decay in an old root canal filling. Removal in one week. Root canals are dangerous as they support pathogenic bacteria some of which are attracted to the brain. 

UPDATE May 2016 Mum's been living on her own in our country home since August 2015! This is huge considering its a big old house on a bush property with no close neighbours. Mum is doing very well, enjoying food and friends. She is now making plans to buy a home back in her own home community near her friends and family. Mum continues to pay attention to eating good wholesome foods and connecting with loved ones. Mum continues fortnightly psychotherapy with a private female therapist who doesn't support drug use. 

 

 

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Incidently, why do you refer to SSRI's as SSLR's - what does that stand for?

 

I meant SSLR's the other was a spelling mistake. 

 

What does SSLR stand for?  

 

In the US most antidepressants are called SSRI's which stands for Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitor, like Prozac, Celexa, Luvox, Lexapro, etc. There is also SNRI's which are Selective Neuropinephrine Reuptake Inhibitor, like Effexor, Pristiq, Cymbalta, etc.  

2005-2008: Effexor; 1/2008 Tapered 3 months, then quit. 7/2008-2009 Reinstated Effexor (crying spells at start of new job.)
2009-3/2013: Switched to Pristiq 50 mg then 100 mg
3/2013: Switched to Lexapro 10mg. Cut down to 5 mg. CT for 2 weeks then reinstated for 6 weeks
8/2013-8/2014: Tapering Lexapro (Lots of withdrawal symptoms)
11/2014 -8/2015: Developed severe insomnia and uncontrollable daily crying spells
12/2014-6/2015: Tried Ambien, Klonopin,Ativan, Lunesta, Sonata, Trazadone, Seroquel, Rameron, Gabapentin - Developed Anxiety disorder, PTSD, and Psychogenic Myoclonus
7/2015-1/2016: Reinstated Lexapro 2 mg (mild improvement, but crying spells still present)

1/2016-5/2017: Lexapro 5 mg ( helped a lot, but poor stress tolerance & depressive episodes)

5/20/2017 - Raised dose to Lexapro 10 mg due to lingering depression(Total of 2 failed tapers & severe PAWS)

9/11/2018 - Present: Still on 10 mg Lexapro and mostly recovered.(Extremely sensitive to stress which triggers Myoclonus.)

Intro page: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4149-lilu-depression-worsened-by-meds/

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Why was your mum put on antidepressants in the first place?

My massive reply. I am so sorry. Now I've come from the end of this I can see how much pain I still have regarding all the years past. I'm certainly not living in the past and I'm so grateful we are at the other end. Writing this did take me back so please forgive some of the anger and frustration at my mothers OLD (never to see again) doctor. 

 

I have since found out more of Mum's story. My mum, like many people in this world suffered trauma as a child. ... I didn't realise until recently but mum had been put on several types of benzo meds, one was Muralax (can't remember exact spelling) and serapax for short periods of time. At one time my mum was going to tranx anonymous with her sister who was also coming off valium for support in coming off these meds. She managed even though dad was never around, always at work doing overtime etc and with 4 children, two of whom were difficult. 41-42 mum had a break down. I was not living at home anymore so I didn't see the lead up. ... This started when mum was 41-42 and her last SSLR was age 62. Over 20 years on SSLR's. 

 

 ...

 

Its all great now though. I know that these meds are often prescribed way too easily. In mums case she needed support and for what was happening to her to stop. She needed to sleep. She needed help not meds. People need help from other people, not meds. Before meds people suffered trauma, moved through with help and became stronger and better more empathic people.

 

how did your mum taper the drugs?

is dr breggin Scientology.??

2007-2015- zoloft 100 mg
5-8/2015 taper zoloft 12.5 mg every 2 weeks
3/2016 -11/16 lexapro 20 mg

taper lexapro every month by 30%

11/4/17-lexapro 3.5 mg

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ChessieCat

According to Wikipedia:

 

"SSRI antidepressants

In 1994, Breggin said that Eli Lilly and Company (maker of the antidepressant Prozac) attempted to discredit him and his book Talking Back to Prozac by linking him to the Church of Scientology and labeling his views as "Neo-Scientology".[19] Breggin denied any connection to Scientology.[19] Breggin later clarified that he was still in agreement with some of CCHR's anti-psychiatric views, supporting Tom Cruise's public stance against psychiatry.[20]"

NEW!!!     INTERVIEW with Altostrata, SA's founder    NEW!!! 

 

Plodding along inch by inch:  12" = 1',  3' =  36 " or 1 yard,  1760 yards  = 63,360" or 1 mile

Current from July 2021:  Pristiq 0.13mg

ADs since ~1992:  25+ years - 1 unknown, Prozac (muscle weakness), Zoloft; citalopram (pooped out) CTed (very sick for 2.5 wks a few months after); Pristiq:  50mg 2012, 100mg beg 2013 (Serotonin Toxicity)  Tapering Oct 2015 

My tapering program   My Intro (goes to my tapering graph)  My website

PLEASE NOTE:  I am not a medical professional.  I provide information and make suggestions.

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Yes I was on antidepressants and anti anxiety for between 12-14 years. I have been medication free since July 2015.

Do you feel completely healed Mary? At what point (length of time) did you feel healed?

 

would love to say I'm completely healed but still going through intense days but not as intense as the beginning of and throughout last year. Lots of childhood and insecurity and fear issues have popped up and seem magnified. Taking a day at a time.

In 2001 - started on Carbamezapine (can't remember dose), Fluoexitine 20mg, Clanozepam (low dose) after a nervous breakdown.

In 2004 - abruptly stopped carbamezapine after falling pregnant.  

In 2009 - changed from Fluoexitine to Citalopram 20mg.

In 2014 - tappered off clanozepam.

In Aug 2015 - cold turkey off Citalopram :o

From Aug - Dec 2015 I had mostly flu-like symptoms and trouble sleeping. From Jan - April 2016 Emotional nightmare ensued, paranoia, excessive anxiety and tormenting thoughts, basically trying to manage these emotions and thoughts which are exhausting.  Lots of intense emotions followed by tears, at times howling when Im alone.In March 2016 I tried Choline & Inisitol, Vit B Complex, Using Aromatherapy, like Lavendar, Clary Sage and others.

In April STOPPED Choline & Inositol as I beleive it was giving me shakes and making me more anxious.  It also made me feel like i'd taken a benzo tablet making me feel sedated.  Reading - The Body Keeps Score by Bessel Van Der Kolk (recommended by a member on this group).

Symptoms - extreme low self esteem and insecurity, intense emotions and tearfulness. This is so so hard.  But im going to keep pushing.  Feel bad for my 2 girls and husband.  I don't want to be seen in this way, especially by the girls. Self-help : praying, meditating, breathing exercises and physical exercises.

Ceterizine (antihistamine) - I've been taking this for many years now for itchiness in my palms and feet.  I take them as and when I need them. JULY 2016 Dr Bach homeopathic remedies and 'rescue remedy'

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Lorin,

 

my mum tapered in her own way, completely unsupported and without any idea what she was doing. I didn't know about it until many months into her tapering. Neither of us had any idea of what was to come. My mum tapered by skipping meds. One day she's take them, another two or three days she would skip them. She did this 7 months and stopped altogether. IN the end I think she was only taking the minimum dose once weekly. 

We didn't find Dr Breggin's book until 10 months after mums last pill at which stage mum was very thin and experiencing suicidal episodes due to her physical condition and symptoms. 

No, Dr Breggins was and is NOT a scientologist. I think he did a little work for them briefly and or he had a partner who was involved. He now has a FB page that his wife runs, check him out. 

* January 2015 I'm supporting my mum age 63 through withdrawal. She has moved in with me and my family, cannot be alone or look after herself. Suicidal episodes, exhausted but unable to sit still, severe anxiety on an off, chronic diarrhoea and digestive issues, fear and gloom, very thin.

*1996 (?) Zoloft (minimum dose) for 15 years, minus 2 to 3 separate years that were attempted unsuccessful WDrawal.

*2010 Lexapro minimum dose for the past 4 years.

*Reduced Lexapro Oct 2013 (minimum dose) by skipping days over a 7 month period. Last med taken end of April 2014, 9 months ago. NO other meds. Initial diet was GAPS eased into a mostly Weston A Price Foundation diet. Supplement with wild fish oil, coconut oil, St Mary's thistle, 5 ml whisky/30 ml water (in emergencies), kefir, gelatine drinks and probiotics.

Aug 3 2015 update. Doing much better, still thin and poor appetite. Discovered decay in an old root canal filling. Removal in one week. Root canals are dangerous as they support pathogenic bacteria some of which are attracted to the brain. 

UPDATE May 2016 Mum's been living on her own in our country home since August 2015! This is huge considering its a big old house on a bush property with no close neighbours. Mum is doing very well, enjoying food and friends. She is now making plans to buy a home back in her own home community near her friends and family. Mum continues to pay attention to eating good wholesome foods and connecting with loved ones. Mum continues fortnightly psychotherapy with a private female therapist who doesn't support drug use. 

 

 

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  • 1 month later...

It took me 5 years to recover.  I was on SSRI's/SNRI for 14 years. First Zoloft, then Paxil, then Effexor. Tapered off Effexor over a 2 or 3 month period in 2012 (way too fast) by asking for tablet form, chopping them in ever smaller pieces. Had protracted withdrawal syndrome and then also Lyme disease.  Refused to return to SSRI's and stuck it out all these years, knowing from this website that healing can take place but it's very slow. 

 

It's been hard torture. I did use buspar for a while, then used SAMe, as much as two 400mg pills a day, and finally this year weaned completely off the SAMe several months ago.  I also used saffron for calming anxiety, and pregnenalone. 

 

Now, finally, I don't need anything for withdrawal!  I feel very stable brain wise but am still dealing with Lyme symptoms - nerve pain, body pains.  I thank God that my brain is finally stable. I can feel enjoyment and contentment again and all other normal emotions.   I occasionally have some anxiety but it's pretty rare and doesn't last, and is very minor compared to the 24/7 near panic feelings I dealt with for about 2 years straight at the beginning of withdrawal.   

 

So the whole process took me 5 years to get brain stabilized.  I think eating healthy and rebuilding gut flora helped the healing.   Even now doctors I see for Lyme pain suggest Neurontin but I NEVER want to mess with the brain meds ever again. I'd rather have physical pain or even die.

 

I tried to update my profile but it doesn't seem to let me.

Edited by scallywag
insert paragraph breaks for readability

2002? zoloft.  Start of synthroid unknown.

2002? switched to paxil  - Developed restless leg syndrome. stopped all caffeine which helped for many years.

2003? switched to effexor XL 75 mg. May 2012 began taper

July 2012 stopped all effexor . Usual WD symptoms, lost excess weight, had more energy. RLS stopped immediately!

Sept 2012 depression off and on, increasing. Tried tryptophan and acupuncture

Dec 2012 severe anxiety began

February 2013 used magnolia bark for anxiety - helped but developed central sleep apnea, so I stopped it

by April 2013- stopped tryptophan, using saffron herb successfully and started HRT

June 2013 doctor noticed bradycardia. I tried very small dose cytomel sev days for hypothyroidism but seemed to strain my heart.

July 2013 stopped saffron due to slow heart and palpitations - did not help.

July 2013 Increased synthroid from 50mg to 75mg. depression and anxiety improved. Heart problems continue.

September & October 2013 - 2 month course of antibiotic for possbile lyme disease - mood and anxiety improved further.  Heart pvc's flair up at times. 

 

 

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Janie, Thanks for sharing what's worked for you.  Would you also post in your introduction topic: Janie - is there any treatment for protracted withdrawal?.

 

I'm not sure what you mean by your profile.  If you mean the information that people see when they click on your name, here's a link to the site's User Settings. The options on the

  • left side of the page are: Overview, Email address, Password, Signature
  • right side of the page are only accessible when you are on the overview: Notification Settings, Edit Profile, and Ignored Users.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.
1997-1999 Effexor; 2002-2005 Effexor XR 37.5 mg linear taper, dropping same #beads/week with bad results

Cymbalta 60 mg 2012 - 2015; 2016: 20 mg to 7 mg exact doses and dates in this post; 2017: 6.3 mg to  0.0 mg  Aug. 12; details here


scallywag's Introduction
Online spreadsheet for dose taper calculations and nz11's THE WORKS spreadsheet

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Jennifer78
On 2017-06-27 at 10:48 PM, Janie said:

It took me 5 years to recover.

...

Now, finally, I don't need anything for withdrawal!  I feel very stable brain wise but am still dealing with Lyme symptoms - nerve pain, body pains.  I thank God that my brain is finally stable. I can feel enjoyment and contentment again and all other normal emotions.   I occasionally have some anxiety but it's pretty rare and doesn't last, and is very minor compared to the 24/7 near panic feelings I dealt with for about 2 years straight at the beginning of withdrawal.   

 

So the whole process took me 5 years to get brain stabilized.  I think eating healthy and rebuilding gut flora helped the healing.   Even now doctors I see for Lyme pain suggest Neurontin but I NEVER want to mess with the brain meds ever again. I'd rather have physical pain or even die.

Janie, you have given me a glimmer of hope for today. Thank you!

Edited by scallywag
trimmed quote to relevant portion

Trazodone 100mg stopped November 2016

Lamictal 200mg stopped November 2016

Celexa 40mg stopped 12-01-16

Abilify 10mg stopped 12-01-16

Wellbutrin XL stopped 6-14-18

I have been on some type of meds for @ least 15 years.

GOD BLESS! 🙏

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caperjackie

Yes .......... I was on Paxil for about 14 years and (in my ignorance) tapered off by skipping doses ........ it took a year. It is now 6 years completely drug free and although there are what I like to call 'residual issues' (the price paid for being on and coming off these foul poisons), I consider myself as healed as I will be. I function well and can deal with the rest. It takes time (WAY too much time sadly) but the brain does heal ........... yours will too.

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manymoretodays

Another one here.  I've been off the Lexapro/escitalopram now for almost 3 years.  I got started in the maze of medical/psychological/mismatch with AD's about 30 years ago.  My introduction is under my user name.  Working on my success story too........sooooo.........wait for it if you would like.  Hoping to post it late fall/early winter here at sa.org........a nice succinct version.  My tapering was not the greatest either........so I may not be the example that you would like.  I was actually on 20mg. of Lexapro at one point briefly, as well as 10mg. briefly..........when I came off of it I had been on 5mg. for at least a couple, if not several years.  I guess I realized it was all bunk as far as A/D effectiveness and me, before I really realized it in a more active way.

 

I'll go take a look at your introduction soon.  Hang in there. 

 

Best, Love, Peace, Recovery/Healing, and........Growth.........

 

mmt

 

 

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016. 

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider. manymoretodays

 

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I have almost recovered from being on anti-depressants and anti-psychotics for the past 15 years, I have now gone 3 months with out any, had some insomnia last week but been fine since then, i have wrote about that here:

 

 

2001 - 2005 prozac,  2001 - 2017 various benzos, mainly diazapem and zanex,  2002 - 2017 olanzapine or seroquel,  2002 -2017 propanolol, 2005 - 2009 venlafaxine 75mg , forced to go cold turkey off venlafaxine as moved Thailand, doctor cut me off and couldn't get it there, severely ill for over 2 years, countered withdrawals with more zanex and seroquel

2014 returned to UK, mainly to get treatment getting off meds

doctor advised to taper seroquel over a few weeks, severely ill and bed bed-bound so reinstated it, 2015 tapered seroquel myself slower over a few months, was off it 2 months and was too ill so went on olanzapine, became zombie and too tired to get out of bed, went back on seroquel, very depressed so went back on venlafaxine, didnt work  so doctor swapped to zoloft became very agitated so back on venlafaxine

June 2016 - felt strong enough to begin tapering again, started what I thought was a slow taper of all meds,  2016 July Not had any alcoholic drink since this date, 

2016 October completely off diazepem, 2017 Feb completely off seroquel, 2017 March completely off proponanlol, 2017 April (day before birthday) completely off venlafaxine, OFF ALL MEDS 11/4/2017, was fine for nearly 3 months and then delayed withdrawal hit,

supplements taking: turmeric capsules, NiaCel (nicotinamide riboside), Vit B12 sublingual, Vit B3, Vit B6, Vit B1, apple cider vinegar, manuka umf 10 honey, camu camu powder,  melatonin when needed, epsom salt baths, juices, smoothies, 

Intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/topic/15175-dj2010-off-all-meds-for-3-months-and-been-fine-now-bad-insomnia/

 

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22 hours ago, caperjackie said:

Yes .......... I was on Paxil for about 14 years and (in my ignorance) tapered off by skipping doses ........ it took a year. It is now 6 years completely drug free and although there are what I like to call 'residual issues' (the price paid for being on and coming off these foul poisons), I consider myself as healed as I will be. I function well and can deal with the rest. It takes time (WAY too much time sadly) but the brain does heal ........... yours will too.

 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9594-ssri-ecsatsy-damage/#comment-207365

 

Quote

 


caperjackie
Members
56 posts
LocationNova Scotia, Canada
Posted February 6, 2016 · Report post
After almost 5 years off these foul poisons I am fairly convinced that there has been some kind of (possibly) permanent brain damage. THIS IS NOT TO SAY THAT I AM A LOST CAUSE .......... I function quite well and consider myself 80% healed but still ........ 80% is not fully recovered. Can I live with this? ABSOLUTELY!! This is not a doom and gloom post and I consider it very supportive as my message is that many actions during our life span will alter the course of our lives, our health and our emotions ....... SSRI usage is just one of them. We do our best and carry on with our lives. I am just so supremely thankful that I am off this stuff and my mind is now my own again .... I gladly pay the price and accept the consequences as I have with every other mistake made in my 63 years. That being said ....... I still believe that I have been royally screwed by Big Pharma. Still and all folks ... it is SO worth it .......... even with the cost. We cannot change what we have done or what has been done to us but we definitely have control of where we go from here so stay the course and make lemonade out of these very bitter lemons ...... XXX

 

hello,

this post was a year ago

your 80% still here  or improved?

 

 

for anxiety 

12 years paxil - cold turkey 1,5 month - switch celexa 1 year taper; total 13 years on brain meds 

67 years old - 9 years  med free

 

in protracted withdrawal

rigidity standing and walking, dryness gougerot-szoegren, sleep deteriorate,

function as have a lack of nerves, improving have been very little 

 

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caperjackie

Hi Stan ......... yes, still 80% but that is OK ...... everything I wrote above still holds. That being said, I recently hit what can only be called 'a wave' ..... did not recognize it until I had an odd physical symptom that has not appeared in years so perhaps there is still more healing to come! This, if it happens, will be welcomed but a bonus only! How about you?

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hi, all is in my signature i updated

for anxiety 

12 years paxil - cold turkey 1,5 month - switch celexa 1 year taper; total 13 years on brain meds 

67 years old - 9 years  med free

 

in protracted withdrawal

rigidity standing and walking, dryness gougerot-szoegren, sleep deteriorate,

function as have a lack of nerves, improving have been very little 

 

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  • 1 month later...

It's so good to see people that have healed or are on their way to healing. I just started on this journey of withdrawal and the anxiety from it has really been getting me down. For months I was going through withdrawal but didn't even know it and wondered why I was getting anxious again. I had forgotten what it felt like to have a panic attack or anxiety like this. I have been recovered from panic attacks, generalized anxiety and depression for almost nine years now but the withdrawal is bringing back those old feelings of anxiety and I have to keep reminding myself that this is not me, it's the withdrawal. It's so so difficult. Plus I know certain foods and beverages interact and cause anxiety. I try using the skills I've learned (CBT) but it doesn't always work in the case of withdrawal. 

I hope that everyone here perseveres and overcomes all their symptoms and obstacles. We will all be stronger people for having to go through this.

Please keep the positive healing stories coming. They give me faith in this most difficult of times.

Peace, love and calmness to all.

Doxepin 200mg in April 1996.

Switched to Prozac in November 1997. Had terrible anxiety and nausea from Prozac.

Switched then to Zoloft 50mg in December 1997.

Reduced to 25mg Zoloft in Early April 2012? Didn't know then to note it down.

Down to 25mg every 4 days around Early October 2012? Again didn't know to take note.

Experiencing interdose withdrawal since May 2017.  

Reinstated Zoloft daily at 12.5mg tablets on August 3, 2017 so I can stabilize and finally taper off. Started to experience shaking all over after 6 days on it. Felt too strong for me.

Reduced the dosage to 3.125mg switching to homemade liquid on August 9, 2017. 

In addition, I take Omega-3 Fish Oil, MSM, Vitamin E, Vitamin D, Evening Primrose Oil, probiotics and Magnesium Glycinate.

http://survivingantidepressants.org/topic/15444-fightback72-tolerance-withdrawal-need-to-start-taper/

 

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  • 4 months later...
On 8/18/2017 at 5:55 PM, fightback72 said:

It's so good to see people that have healed or are on their way to healing. I just started on this journey of withdrawal and the anxiety from it has really been getting me down. For months I was going through withdrawal but didn't even know it and wondered why I was getting anxious again. I had forgotten what it felt like to have a panic attack or anxiety like this. I have been recovered from panic attacks, generalized anxiety and depression for almost nine years now but the withdrawal is bringing back those old feelings of anxiety and I have to keep reminding myself that this is not me, it's the withdrawal. It's so so difficult. Plus I know certain foods and beverages interact and cause anxiety. I try using the skills I've learned (CBT) but it doesn't always work in the case of withdrawal. 

I hope that everyone here perseveres and overcomes all their symptoms and obstacles. We will all be stronger people for having to go through this.

Please keep the positive healing stories coming. They give me faith in this most difficult of times.

Peace, love and calmness to all.

Hello fightback72,

How are you doing with your AD withdrawal and anxiety?  I am tapering off prozac and am just looking for encouragement and distraction from my symptoms.

Best wishes,

realme

Alcohol periodic excessive 1963-1976, Valium sporadic 1964-1973,  Imipramine off & on 1982-1985, Fluoxetine 10mg-80 mg. Oct., 1995-Jan., 2014; Cymbalta, other ADs 1/2014-3/2014; Abilify 5 mg. 3/2014 - 8/8/17; Trintellix 20 mg. 3/2014 - 9/2017; Propranolol 60-80 mg. sporadically Sept-Oct, 2017; Seroquel few days Sept 2017 (c/t); Wellbutrin 150 mg. Sept, 2017 updosed to 300 mg. few days till c/t Oct 8, 2017, fish oil, vitD, vitE Oct 16, 2017-pres. Lipoflavonoid 4/2017-pres.  Fluoxetine 10 mg. Sept-Oct 8, 2017, 20 mg. 10/9- 10/15; 10 mg. 10/16 - 12/29;  9 mg. 12/30 - 2/9; 2 mL liquid (8.1mg) 2/10 - 3/7; 1.8 mL (7.29 mg) 3/8 -3/20; 1.6 mL (6.561mg) 3/20-4/2; 1.4 mL (5.9 mg) 4/3-4/14; 1mL (4 mg.) 4/15-4/22; .9mL (3.6mg) 4/23-5/1; .81mL (3.24 mg) 5/2-5/24; .73mL (2.916mg.) 5/25-6/8; .65mL 6/9-6/23; .6mL 6/24-7/17; .58mL 7/18-7/28; .525mL 7/29-8/13; .5 mL 8/14-21; .45mL 8/22-31; .4mL 9/2-21; .35mL 9/22-10/4; .3mL 10/5-28; .25mL 10/28-11/10; .2mL 11/11-11/24; .18mL 11/25-12/3; .1mL 12/4-12/18. Zero-12/19/18-present.

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I was on for 28 years and got off all antidepressants at the end of July 2017.. guess I essentially did not taper slow enough but with the amounts I was on it would have taken me many years to get off.. so I m still glad I stopped.  I think I have had one window that lasted one day since then and I cry thinking about how happy I was that one day... i m going through a really bad spell now after 5 months off and feel like I m going backwards no motivation etc feeling really hopeless and dejected

 

Zoloft . On 10-15 years started 100 mg last dose 200mg tapered to zero in one month.. psych dr advise Last dose:  50mg Zoloft in February 2017

5mg  Olanzipine - 1 -2 yrs last dose 5 mg in Jan 2017 told to stop within a weEk

 

NOTE:  had very bad withdrawal symptoms with discontinuation of Zoloft and Olanzipine.. very very seriously suicidal... 

 

450mg Effexor XR - started at 75mg a couple of years ago, increasing every few months until I got to 450mg

beginning in February to July 22 - 450, 300, 150, 75, 37.5 , 16.5 mg

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I don’t think I can go through this withdrawal for years like others here... I m too depressed and paralyzed and hopeless.. I feel like I was like this on my meds and kept hoping things would get better and all that happened was I got more emotionally blunted.. so I decided to go off and now it has been 5 months still the same no change.. I want to give up

 

Zoloft . On 10-15 years started 100 mg last dose 200mg tapered to zero in one month.. psych dr advise Last dose:  50mg Zoloft in February 2017

5mg  Olanzipine - 1 -2 yrs last dose 5 mg in Jan 2017 told to stop within a weEk

 

NOTE:  had very bad withdrawal symptoms with discontinuation of Zoloft and Olanzipine.. very very seriously suicidal... 

 

450mg Effexor XR - started at 75mg a couple of years ago, increasing every few months until I got to 450mg

beginning in February to July 22 - 450, 300, 150, 75, 37.5 , 16.5 mg

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Offfforgood

 

You can do this my friend. We all have problems. Just remember that one good day you had is a good thing which shows you are in WD. It will surely end some day. Just keep on fighting buddy...

2015 -  2016 Xanax only rescue doses of 0.125 mg 1-2 times per month
 March 2016 0.125Mg * 2 Xanax for 10 days.

20 March 2016 0.25 Mg * 2 Xanax for one week. 1 April 2016 Tranxene 5 mg and Fevarin but bad reaction for 5 days.4 April 2016 25 Mg Amitryptiline + 6 MG bromazepam at night

Started tapering Bromazepam 6 days later reached up to 3 MG in 10 days and withdrawal. Pdoc asked to go 6 MG again.

10 of May started Remeron 15 MG and started tapering Bromazepam again.

SINCE 09/06/2016 BENZO FREE - Started Tapering Remeron 04/07/2016

 

04/Jul/16 12.8 Mg, 11/Aug/16 12 Mg, 20/Aug/16 11Mg, 3/Sept/16 10Mg, 11/Sept/16 9 Mg, 30/Sept/16 8.1 Mg, 14/Oct/16 7.25 Mg, 17/Nov/16 6.7, 23/Nov/16 6.5, 2/Dec/16 6.25, 9/Dec/16 6Mg, 25/Dec/16 5.7Mg, 4/Jan/17 5.4Mg, 20/Jan/17 5.2Mg, 07/Feb/17 5 Mg, 15/Feb/17 4.8Mg, 27/Feb/17 4.5Mg, 15/Mar/17 4.2Mg, 23/Mar/17 4Mg, 1/Apr/17 3.7Mg, 14/Apr/17 3.4Mg, 27/Apr/17 3.1Mg, 06/May/17 2.8Mg, 22/May/17 2.6Mg, 31/May/17 2.3Mg 09/Jun/17 2Mg, 20/Jun/17 1.7Mg, 29/Jun/17 1.4Mg, 11/Jul/17 1.2Mg, 20/Jul/17 1Mg, 31/Jul/17 0.8Mg, 11/Aug/17 0.6Mg, 23/Aug/17 0.5Mg, 05/Sept/17 0.4Mg, 13/Sept/17 0.3Mg. 22/Sept/17 0.2Mg, 03/Oct/17 0.15Mg, 10/Oct/17 0.1Mg, 23/Oct/17 0.05Mg, 22/Nov/17 0.025Mg, 06/DECEMBER/2017 MIRT FREEE.

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I was on Mirtazapine for 10 years. The 10 years includes the 14 months I spent tapering. I decided to go off the meds because of the long list of health problems I'd developed on them. Many of the health issues were related to a ridiculous weight gain. Mirt is notorious for weight gain, and also for increased risk of diabetes. Since coming off Mirt, I've been able to stop 6 of the other meds I was on and have gone a very long way to regaining my health.

 

I'm not sure I could say there was an exact point where I started feeling normal again. But I am mostly symptom-free at this point. I've been off the AD for 3 1/2 years now. Life has thrown a lot of other things my way during this period of time, so it's hard to know the exact cause and resolution of each thing.

 

Currently dealing with an injury that came on mysteriously, much like the shoulder one a year and a half ago. But, given that I had a serious MVA awhile back, it's quite possible that's at least partly to blame for these injuries. I know other people on here have said they feel more vulnerable to injury than prior to being on meds. But I'm 14 years older than when I started the AD....and at age 63, these things are also more likely to happen.

 

I've done my best to get regular exercise, do some form of daily meditation, eat healthy, and reduce stress in my life wherever possible. Treatments and supplements in my signature have helped a great deal as well. Most importantly, I take responsibility for my health and well-being and have as little do with western medicine as possible.

 

My sleep is actually better than it has been most of my life--average 7.5-8 hours a night. I have good energy, decent motivation, feel a full range of emotions, and have people and activities in my life I enjoy a great deal. There are aches and pains, but that's true for most of the people I know who are my age. I've worked very hard to change negative thought patterns and behaviors, so I suffer much less than I ever did before meds from these things. Healing and change are possible; they require a diligent, ongoing effort in my experience anyway.

 

 

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium. What has helped me most: qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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21 hours ago, freespirit said:

I was on Mirtazapine for 10 years. The 10 years includes the 14 months I spent tapering. I decided to go off the meds because of the long list of health problems I'd developed on them. Many of the health issues were related to a ridiculous weight gain. Mirt is notorious for weight gain, and also for increased risk of diabetes. Since coming off Mirt, I've been able to stop 6 of the other meds I was on and have gone a very long way to regaining my health.

 

I'm not sure I could say there was an exact point where I started feeling normal again. But I am mostly symptom-free at this point. I've been off the AD for 3 1/2 years now. Life has thrown a lot of other things my way during this period of time, so it's hard to know the exact cause and resolution of each thing.

 

Currently dealing with an injury that came on mysteriously, much like the shoulder one a year and a half ago. But, given that I had a serious MVA awhile back, it's quite possible that's at least partly to blame for these injuries. I know other people on here have said they feel more vulnerable to injury than prior to being on meds. But I'm 14 years older than when I started the AD....and at age 63, these things are also more likely to happen.

 

I've done my best to get regular exercise, do some form of daily meditation, eat healthy, and reduce stress in my life wherever possible. Treatments and supplements in my signature have helped a great deal as well. Most importantly, I take responsibility for my health and well-being and have as little do with western medicine as possible.

 

My sleep is actually better than it has been most of my life--average 7.5-8 hours a night. I have good energy, decent motivation, feel a full range of emotions, and have people and activities in my life I enjoy a great deal. There are aches and pains, but that's true for most of the people I know who are my age. I've worked very hard to change negative thought patterns and behaviors, so I suffer much less than I ever did before meds from these things. Healing and change are possible; they require a diligent, ongoing effort in my experience anyway.

 

 

Thank you so much for posting your update!  What a nice story to read at the start of this new year!  
Best wishes for 2018,
M.

Dec 1, 2016. 10 mg zyprexa for 1.5 month. Started taper mid-Jan. 2017. Cut 1.25 mg every 2 weeks; smaller cuts 2.5 mg down. Stopped at .6 mg. May 7, 2017: zyprexa free. 
Zoloft: Dec1, 2016, 200 mg. Started taper: Jun12, 2017: 197.5 mg; Jun19,:195 mg; July 2:185mg; July 9,:180 mg; July16,: 175; July 23: 170; July 30: 165; Aug6: 160; Aug13: 155; Aug. 20: 150; Aug.27: 146 mg; Sept3: 145 mg; Sept10:143 mg; Sept17:140 mg....Nov5: 122 mg...Dec3:112.5 mg; Jan14, 2018: 95 mg...Jan28: 90 mg; Feb21:80 mg; Mar11: 75 mg; May2:70 mg; May15: 68 mg; May28: 65 mg; Jun9: 62 mg;Jun25: 60 mg:July22: 55 mg; Aug25: 45 mg. Aug28: 50 mg...Oct 28: 38 mg; Dec.4: 30 mg; Jan8,2019: 25mg; Feb6: 23.5 mg; Apr1:17.5mg; May1:1 mg; May 5: 18;  May 18:15mg; June 16:12.5mg; Sept 10:11 mg; Sept.16:10 mg; Oct. 1: 9mg; Nov. 27: 8mg; Dec.5: 7mg; Jan.1,2020, 6 mg; Feb1: 5 mg; May 1: 2.5 mg; Jn 1: 2 mg; Jy 1: 1.5 mg
Spreadsheet: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1pw4tjImAJ92OIVyRvZoZYjqxiKMk7wvp-ljiIi1olRo/edit#gid=0

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On 1/4/2018 at 12:46 PM, Offforgood said:

I don’t think I can go through this withdrawal for years like others here... I m too depressed and paralyzed and hopeless.. I feel like I was like this on my meds and kept hoping things would get better and all that happened was I got more emotionally blunted.. so I decided to go off and now it has been 5 months still the same no change.. I want to give up

Hi Offforgood,

Please don't give up.  I know it feels like it, but five months is not a long time.  I started withdrawing from prescribed medication in August, and I have had many days where I felt like I couldn't go on.  Keep talking to the people on this site, and you will get help.  So many people have been working at this for a long time, and they all say there is hope.  I've been reading books by Breggin, Glenmullen and now William Glasser's Reality Therapy.  At least I can read; that's a big improvement for me.  We don't have to do this for years.  Just get through this one day.

 

Did anything happen to put extra stress on you today?  Maybe if you talk about it, it will help a little.  When I say I want to give up, I usually mean that I am at the end of my ability to cope with the pain I'm feeling.  Maybe someone on this site can offer something that will give you some small good emotional feeling, some hope or some comfort.  Please tell me more about your day today.

Best wishes for hope and healing,

RealMe

Alcohol periodic excessive 1963-1976, Valium sporadic 1964-1973,  Imipramine off & on 1982-1985, Fluoxetine 10mg-80 mg. Oct., 1995-Jan., 2014; Cymbalta, other ADs 1/2014-3/2014; Abilify 5 mg. 3/2014 - 8/8/17; Trintellix 20 mg. 3/2014 - 9/2017; Propranolol 60-80 mg. sporadically Sept-Oct, 2017; Seroquel few days Sept 2017 (c/t); Wellbutrin 150 mg. Sept, 2017 updosed to 300 mg. few days till c/t Oct 8, 2017, fish oil, vitD, vitE Oct 16, 2017-pres. Lipoflavonoid 4/2017-pres.  Fluoxetine 10 mg. Sept-Oct 8, 2017, 20 mg. 10/9- 10/15; 10 mg. 10/16 - 12/29;  9 mg. 12/30 - 2/9; 2 mL liquid (8.1mg) 2/10 - 3/7; 1.8 mL (7.29 mg) 3/8 -3/20; 1.6 mL (6.561mg) 3/20-4/2; 1.4 mL (5.9 mg) 4/3-4/14; 1mL (4 mg.) 4/15-4/22; .9mL (3.6mg) 4/23-5/1; .81mL (3.24 mg) 5/2-5/24; .73mL (2.916mg.) 5/25-6/8; .65mL 6/9-6/23; .6mL 6/24-7/17; .58mL 7/18-7/28; .525mL 7/29-8/13; .5 mL 8/14-21; .45mL 8/22-31; .4mL 9/2-21; .35mL 9/22-10/4; .3mL 10/5-28; .25mL 10/28-11/10; .2mL 11/11-11/24; .18mL 11/25-12/3; .1mL 12/4-12/18. Zero-12/19/18-present.

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  • ChessieCat changed the title to Have you recovered from being on antidepressants long term and/or high dose?

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