Moderator brassmonkey Posted August 31, 2020 Author Moderator Share Posted August 31, 2020 I haven't posted here in a while, but recently I've been running into a lot of talk about rebuilding one's life after ADWD. I just posted this on another thread and want to share it here for others to find. For many ADWD can be used as a time for personal assessment and growth. The WD process makes us question almost every aspect of our lives and belief system. It is hard to go through, a trial by fire at times, but so worth it. Many of us started these drugs because something was wrong in our lives that was causing us problems. Those things are now in the past and they should remain there. Our thought processes and beliefs that lead to those situations are in the process of being burn away by the changes the drugs have made and the ADWD process. It is the perfect time to rebuild in the image that we want, not the image we are told we want. I found making the break from society dictated measures of achievement to my personal definition of contentment to be very important. What my friends and neighbors have and do is interesting to watch, but it is what makes me content in my life that really matters. My wife and I have a nice house, not the biggest or best, but we are quite happy with it and do little things to make it more our own. Living in Los Angeles there is no way to win at that game. Snoop Dog has a place about a mile from here worth five or six times what ours is. Bill Gates is just across town, no way we could compete there. But it doesn't matter, we love where we are and it makes us happy. I have a friend who is a Doctors receptionist (low pay, part time) who will spend $500 for a designer handbag with out a thought, only to have to buy a different one next month because this one is out of style. We see it all the time here with cloths, cars, cell phones, you name it. It never makes the people happy, only more and more frustrated. Identifying the things that make one content and building on them is what is important. I have a nice house, a good car, I can travel when conditions allow and food on the table. I don't care that my neighbor just bought a ????, I'm happy for them but it really doesn't matter to me. Contentment is part of the concept of "Living Without a Goal". From birth we are programmed to achieve. "The one who dies with the most toys wins". "You're nobody, unless you're the best". "Why are you sitting around when you could be out achieving/earning"? Those are false, unobtainable goals that can never be reached and lead to a life of frustration, anxiety and depression. It is much better to discover what makes one content and strive for a and maintain that level on a physical and spiritual level. All this is very much a art of ADWD. The healing process involves relegating the past to the past, and making reasonable plans for the future but not worrying about it. More importantly it is about learning to be content with who we are and where we are and making the changes required to get us to that point. 3 20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013. Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks. The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better. Final Dose 0.016mg. Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017 "It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general." Stephen Hawking Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator Emeritus elbee Posted September 1, 2020 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted September 1, 2020 6 hours ago, brassmonkey said: Contentment is part of the concept of "Living Without a Goal". From birth we are programmed to achieve. "The one who dies with the most toys wins". "You're nobody, unless you're the best". "Why are you sitting around when you could be out achieving/earning"? Those are false, unobtainable goals that can never be reached and lead to a life of frustration, anxiety and depression. It is much better to discover what makes one content and strive for a and maintain that level on a physical and spiritual level. All this is very much a art of ADWD. The healing process involves relegating the past to the past, and making reasonable plans for the future but not worrying about it. More importantly it is about learning to be content with who we are and where we are and making the changes required to get us to that point Thanks for the update, Brass . . . I really enjoyed these sections (above) about contentment in particular. So true! I'm learning to release a lot of what I used to think was most important. I've moving away from living a life of intense attachment and addiction . . . there is always better, there is always more, never enough. Whew, that's exhausting! I appreciate you talking about life after anti-depressant drug withdrawal. When in the thick of tapering, it's even hard to imagine that a "life after" exists. What I've found for myself is that the taper became the training for the "life after." I wish I had known that sooner 😉 Keep living in your truth my friend . . . 1 My suggestions are not medical advice. They are my opinions based on my own experience, strength and hope. You are in charge of your own medical / healing / recovery choices. My success story | My introduction thread ZOLOFT FREE - COMPLETELY DRUG FREE 4/28/2019! - total time on 28+ years BENZO FREE! 4/7/2018 - total time on 27+ years REMERON FREE! 12/11/2016 - total time on 15 months Caffeine & Nicotine Free 2014 / 2015 - smoked for 28 years Alcohol Free 4/1/2014 - drank for 30 years Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Naczoz Posted September 2, 2020 Share Posted September 2, 2020 @brassmonkey did u had pssd? what was your sexuall disfunction sympthoms? 01.12.2018 - 01.03.2019 - Took sertraline and than fluvosamine for major depression. Got SEVERE PSSD (no libido, no erections, pleasureless orgasma, total genital anesthesia, emotional numbness, lost of personality) No wave and windows, no improvement so far. Just lije 1-2% in numbness in first two months post quitting. Im suicidal because of pssd. I dont believe in recovery since my state didnt improve in any significant way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator Emeritus getofflex Posted September 2, 2020 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted September 2, 2020 Brass monkey, I couldn't agree with you more. So many think that happiness is in material success, but that is wrong. I am most content with my relationship with Jesus, and with the few friends and family that I have. J Please do not private message me. Only tag me for urgent questions about tapering and reinstating - thank you. ***Please note this is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a doctor who understands psych meds and how to withdraw from them, if you can find one. Lexapro Started Apr 15 2010 - 10 mg; started taper August 2017, recent taper info: Apr 2 '20 0.18 mg; Jul 16 0.17 mg, Aug 23 0.16 mg, Oct 7 0.15 mg, Nov 8 - 0.14, Jan 16 '21 - 0.13, Feb 7 - 0.12, Feb 22 - 0.11, Mar 26 - 0.10, May 21 - 0.09, June 15 - 0.08 Aug 16 - 0.07, Oct 6 - 0.06, Nov 21 0.05, Dec. 17 0.04, Jan 14 '22 0.03, Feb 19 0.02, Apr 18 0.01, May 15 0.005, Jul 8, 0.00. Psych Drug Free as of July 8, 2022!! Woohoo!!! other meds: Levothyroxine 75 mg magnesium in small amounts at 4 AM, before bed suppl AM: fish oil, flax oil, vit C, vit E, multivitamin, zinc suppl 8 PM: magnesium 350 mg, extended release vitamin C, melatonin 2 mg Paxil 2002 - 2010, switched to Lexapro 2010 Trazodone 50 mg. 2002 - 2019, fast tapered in 2019 Xanax 0.5 mg as needed 2002 - 2019, up to 3x weekly Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator brassmonkey Posted September 2, 2020 Author Moderator Share Posted September 2, 2020 @Naczoz no I didn't have many problems in that respect. I had more problems from the alcohol than the paxil, and that cleared up when I stopped drinking. 20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013. Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks. The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better. Final Dose 0.016mg. Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017 "It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general." Stephen Hawking Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Purplerain Posted October 2, 2020 Share Posted October 2, 2020 Hi Brassmonkey just wanted to say I have read your story and find it truly inspiring. Congratulations on your recovery, and thank you so much for taking the time to help others by sharing your wisdom on here. Your impact will be felt far and wide, by many people you will never meet. What a wonderful thing to be able to look back on your life and know for certain that you made a difference in this world 2008 put on 75mg Effexor XR (Venlafaxine) after breakup with long term boyfriend 2009 Dose increased to 150mg 2010 Dose increased to 300mg plus 25mg Quetiapine added to aid sleep and control hypomania 2011 first attempt to withdraw. Taper much too fast on psychiatrist's advice (300-0mg in 1 month) suffer first and only psychotic episode. Put back on 75mg generic Venlafaxine (no more Quetiapine) 2014 reduce dose to 1/4 of a 37.5mg Venlafaxine tablet during pregnancy. Suffer extreme social anxiety/agoraphobia 2015 Daughter is born. Advised not to breastfeed due to Ven being present in breastmilk. Suffer PND and go back to taking 37.5mg tablet daily. Start to experience heavy fatigue each day after taking Venlafaxine tablet. 14th June 2017 - start 10% monthly taper reduction method. June 2018: 10mg June 2019: 4.5ml June 2020: 2mg June 2021: 0.9mg June 2022: 0.35mg Jan 23: 0.14mg Feb 23: 0.12mg March 23: 0.1mg April 23: 0.08mg May 23: 0.06mg June 23: 0.04mg July 23: 0.02mg Officially free of all psychiatric medication as of 1st August 2023 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Farid Posted October 19, 2020 Share Posted October 19, 2020 Hello brass monkey, Do you have any advice for me ? Actually I'm on paxil 7,3 mg since 13 days and deppresing I am at 7.3 mg and the discouragement and the state of absolute sadness and suicidal thoughts have returned. I had started again a decrease since June 2020 to 5/100 then I gradually climbed to 10/100 but already the pass to 8.1 has been more delicate. I usually have more problem 2 to 3 weeks. but this b**** added an increase in anxiety and depression. the problem is that i have been affected by two problems since january 2020. a complete withdrawal of caffeine which increased my anxiety and taking antibiotics in March including fluoroquinolone cipro which is unfortunately known to interact very very negatively with anti depressants and increases anxiety. I remember 24 hours after taking the medication that my anxiety was soaring and I wanted to die. it was a horrible year. but I was on the point of reducing paxil at the end of June despite the overwhelming anxiety. I had better times around July August September. I don't know what to do today. resume the old dosage from September? wait until the current dosage is better accepted and wait two months before reducing less strongly. or simply do nothing more. I have the dosage done by the pharmacy because it is impossible for me to find the liquid here in Belgium and to reduce the dosage myself I would not know. thank you and sorry for my english. Paxil 20mg start novembre 2016 paxil 10mg since maybe September 2017 Take paxil 10mg one day and not the second day Augustus 2018 to November 2018 paxil 5mg and crash return paxil 10 mg since December 2019 to October 2019 October 2019 to December 8 mg december 2019 7 mg january to June 2020 10 mg July 2020 9,5mg augustus 20 9mg september 2020 8,1mg october 2020 7,3 mg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator brassmonkey Posted January 29, 2021 Author Moderator Share Posted January 29, 2021 (edited) I can see that it's been a while since I visited my thread. TRIGGER WARNING Well, I went and got my first COVID jab this afternoon. So far, so good, but it's only been a few hours. I will say that I found the entire experience quite triggering, or rather the getting ready for it. LA County did a fantastic job of organizing the entire drive through operation. Monica and I were in and out in less than half an hour. My problem was before hand, being triggered by the whole "wonder drug, mass injections, only tested for a few months on a limited number of people, there are little to no side effects" thing. Humm, where have I heard that all before? I have to admit that my journey going on, living with and getting off of Paxil has severely colored my attitude toward pharmaceutical manufacturers and their products and the prospect of trusting them yet again made me feel like I was wearing a red shirt in a B grade Science Fiction film. I'm not at all happy about the situation I have landed in, I doubt many of us are, but it is the situation and we have very little we can do about it. The infection rate here in Los Angeles is the highest in the world. As of last week one in every five people is infected. So if I'm not, that means one of those other four people in the room probably is. I'm over 65, the mortality fate for my age range is about 20%, after a very long and painful hospitalization. I've had breathing problems all my life, so a disease that targets the lungs would have a field day with me. I can go on and on about wanting to live life and the plans we have, but there is no need to expound any further. Suffice it to say I put on my red shirt and drank the kool-aid, trying to believe that this time they got it right. Edited January 30, 2021 by brassmonkey typo 1 20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013. Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks. The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better. Final Dose 0.016mg. Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017 "It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general." Stephen Hawking Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mentor Happy2Heal Posted January 29, 2021 Mentor Share Posted January 29, 2021 so good to hear from you Brass! I totally relate to feeling extremely skeptical of the Big Pharma... the vaccine troubles me somewhat, so I'm kinda of glad that I won't be able to get it til probably the summer. I figure by then if there's going to be more than minor issues, they will start to show up. Hoping you have no issues whatsoever, and that it keeps you from getting this blasted virus!! PLEASE DO NOT SEND ME PRIVATE MESSAGES, thank you. pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total) Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictal- plus brief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. First attempt to get off it was 2007- WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 2013 too fast taper down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs June of 2105, tapered again too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". felt ok until Sept, then acute WD hit!! reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106 Tapered off to zero by Oct. 2017 Doing very well. Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, age 63 Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content PRESENT DAYS: Loving life! ❤️ with all it's ups and downs Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Krisseyb Posted January 29, 2021 Share Posted January 29, 2021 @brassmonkeyglad to hear from you as well!!! I am also VERY skeptical of drugs now (of any kind!) So I can totally relate to your post!! I am hoping and praying that you will do well with it!! 2005-2020 diff AD for trouble sleeping, switched multiple times. 2020 Dec Escitalopram 10 mg 2021 Jan 10 mg -start BMS taper w/2 wk hold 2022 March 3.63 mg 2022 July 2.65 mg 2022 November 1.96 mg 2023 February 1.48 mg 2023 August .90 mg .25mg Melatonin (as needed) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator Emeritus getofflex Posted January 29, 2021 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted January 29, 2021 @brassmonkeykeep us posted on how this COVID vaccine affects you. I'm praying for your wellbeing. Jennifer Please do not private message me. Only tag me for urgent questions about tapering and reinstating - thank you. ***Please note this is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a doctor who understands psych meds and how to withdraw from them, if you can find one. Lexapro Started Apr 15 2010 - 10 mg; started taper August 2017, recent taper info: Apr 2 '20 0.18 mg; Jul 16 0.17 mg, Aug 23 0.16 mg, Oct 7 0.15 mg, Nov 8 - 0.14, Jan 16 '21 - 0.13, Feb 7 - 0.12, Feb 22 - 0.11, Mar 26 - 0.10, May 21 - 0.09, June 15 - 0.08 Aug 16 - 0.07, Oct 6 - 0.06, Nov 21 0.05, Dec. 17 0.04, Jan 14 '22 0.03, Feb 19 0.02, Apr 18 0.01, May 15 0.005, Jul 8, 0.00. Psych Drug Free as of July 8, 2022!! Woohoo!!! other meds: Levothyroxine 75 mg magnesium in small amounts at 4 AM, before bed suppl AM: fish oil, flax oil, vit C, vit E, multivitamin, zinc suppl 8 PM: magnesium 350 mg, extended release vitamin C, melatonin 2 mg Paxil 2002 - 2010, switched to Lexapro 2010 Trazodone 50 mg. 2002 - 2019, fast tapered in 2019 Xanax 0.5 mg as needed 2002 - 2019, up to 3x weekly Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melissa03 Posted January 29, 2021 Share Posted January 29, 2021 @brassmonkey what vaccine did you get? There are 3 types here in Europe. I hope everything will be ok. 20 mg seroxat from December 2012, several failed attempts to quit. Last attempt in 2019 resulted in terrible crush after being 3 months drug free (13. feb 2020) 1 March 2020 reinstated 10 mg seroxat July 2020 began slow taper. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator brassmonkey Posted January 29, 2021 Author Moderator Share Posted January 29, 2021 We specifically went for the Pfizer. The reports on it have been better than the others. Just about a full day and things are seeming well. My arm is quite sore at the injection site. I frequently get a little soreness from shots, but this one I can really feel. 1 20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013. Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks. The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better. Final Dose 0.016mg. Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017 "It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general." Stephen Hawking Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JackieDecides Posted January 29, 2021 Share Posted January 29, 2021 1 hour ago, brassmonkey said: We specifically went for the Pfizer. The reports on it have been better than the others. Just about a full day and things are seeming well. My arm is quite sore at the injection site. I frequently get a little soreness from shots, but this one I can really feel. I had my second pfizer shot a week ago and all I had was arm soreness (and not very much) with both shots. I know some are reporting more side affects with the second shot, but it doesn't always happen. I am wishing you the best! well, wishing it for us all. Currently taking Ramapril (blood pressure) 5 mg twice a day Omeprazole 10 mg AM and 20 mg PM (the taper has gone nowhere after the first cut) Famotidine once a day (and I still needs tums sometimes) magnesium 200 mg at night as of yesterday 2 fish oil capsules "EPA-DHA 1000" off Lexapro as of 5/2018 - last dose had been 5 mg every other day for a couple years highest dose had been 20 mg at which point I was diagnosed with Bipolar II, which went away when I cut the lexapro down to 15 mg. I spent years on Paxil before Lexapro (can't remember dose), briefly on Effexor and Abilify and others I have forgotten. in fact, when I was diagnoses with BPII I was put on all kinds of things which made me feel so bad I stopped them cold turkey within maybe 3 or 4 weeks, thank goodness. since then I've known these pills were terrible and I weaned down the Lexapro with zero help or support over I'm not sure how many years. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator Emeritus ten0275 Posted January 30, 2021 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted January 30, 2021 @brassmonkey Very thankful you are documenting this. I'm not in a position to receive the vaccine as of yet, but have been watching very carefully for how it's being tolerated particularly by those of us with sensitive nervous systems. Dave 1996 - .5mg Ativan as needed, 7.5mg Remeron daily2008 - .5mg Xanax, Ativan discontinued, Remeron continued2012 - .5mg Xanax, .25mg Ativan 3x daily, Remeron continued2/2012 - Jumped from Remeron, continued .5mg Xanax .25mg Ativan 3x daily4/2012 - Began rapid taper of .5mg Xanax .25mg Ativan 3x daily6/2012 - Jumped from Xanax and Ativan, voluntary hospitalization followed7/2012 - 2nd voluntary hospitalization, reinstated Remeron, bumped to 30mg, also given risperidone.8/2012 - discontinued risperidone, tried gabapentin, dicontinued gabapentin, Remeron 30mg continued10/2012 to current - tapered Remeron 10% every 4 to 6 weeks (sometimes more time) using liquid compound12/2014 - 2mg Remeron 1/16/2015 - 1.9mg Remeron 8/1/2015 -1.6mg Remeron - 03/1/2016 - 1.5mg Remeron - 1/2/2017 1.3mg - 5/7/2017 1.2mg - 5/13/2017 - syringe size change - 6/8/2017 - 1.1mg - 7/10/2017 - 1mg - 9/1/2017 - 0.9mg - 10/22/2017 - 0.8mg - 11/22/2017 - 0.7mg - 2/2/2018 - 0.6mg - 3/13/2018 - new compound pharmacy - 5/20/2018 - 0.5mg - 8/31/2018 - 0.4mg - 11/16/2018 - 0.3mg - 12/24/2018 - 0.2mg - 4/1/2019 - 0.1mg - 5/1/2019 - .05mg - 0mg achieved 2019-06-15. 🤞 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator brassmonkey Posted January 30, 2021 Author Moderator Share Posted January 30, 2021 The shoulder isn't much more sore than normal. A bit more sensitive to the touch at the injection site, but I can move it without much pain. Pretty much just the general achiness that I have all the time. No other symptoms. 20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013. Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks. The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better. Final Dose 0.016mg. Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017 "It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general." Stephen Hawking Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator brassmonkey Posted February 19, 2021 Author Moderator Share Posted February 19, 2021 Got my second COVID shot about seven hours ago. They did a good job of handling all the cars for the drive up and all the technical aspects of giving out the shots. All the personal were quite friendly and the whole thing went quite smoothly. About an hour later I started to feel dizzy and after fighting through some shopping and putting things away I fell asleep on the recliner for several of hours. Now I'm up and functioning but still pretty dizzy. Monica appears to not be having any problems. My shoulder doesn't hurt too much but we will see what tomorrow brings. 20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013. Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks. The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better. Final Dose 0.016mg. Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017 "It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general." Stephen Hawking Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Longroadhome Posted February 20, 2021 Share Posted February 20, 2021 How are you feeling now @brassmonkey? hope the dizziness has lifted sending (((((((((((( hugs)))))))))))) your way for a brighter day Nov 2018 Pregabalin 2x50 mg a day to help with Paxil WD. Aug 2019 2 x 25mg a day, April 2020 45mg, May 40mg, June 35mg, July 30mg, end July 25mg, Aug 24mg, June 2021 14mg, Jan 2022 14mg (2x7mg a day), Oct 10mg, Nov 5mg, December 25th 2022 0mg 🎈 Oct 2004 - Oct 2018 Paxil 20 mg, Nov 15mg, Dec 10mg, Feb 2019 7.5mg crashed, Feb 8.5mg, Nov 8mg, March 2020 7.2mg, April 6.5mg, May 5.9mg, June 5.4mg, July 4.8mg, Dec 4.5mg, Jan 2021 4mg, Feb 3.6mg, March 3.2mg, April 2.9mg, Aug 2.7mg, Sept 2.4mg, Oct 2.2mg, Nov 2mg, Dec 1.8mg, Feb 2022 1.6mg, March 1.4mg, April 1.2mg, May 1.0mg, June 0.8mg, July 0.6mg, Aug 0.4mg, Sep 0.2mg, October 6th 2022 0mg 🎈 December 25th 2022 drug free these dates are approximate Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator brassmonkey Posted February 20, 2021 Author Moderator Share Posted February 20, 2021 Thanks LRH, always appreciated. Things were a lot better yesterday, still a bit "off" but manageable and was freezing cold even though the house was at the normal temperature. Interesting thing was, Monica was fine the day of the shots, but yesterday could barely get out of bed she felt so bad. We'll see how she is doing today. So far so good for me. 1 20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013. Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks. The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better. Final Dose 0.016mg. Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017 "It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general." Stephen Hawking Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Longroadhome Posted February 20, 2021 Share Posted February 20, 2021 Glad the dizziness has gone and really hoping Monica is now feeling better 😊 funny thing the vaccine affecting people differently and some not at all. my husband only felt some discomfort round the injection site . My daughter felt really poorly the day after with aches, pains and lethargic and the same with my sister. Im getting rather nervous about mine haven’t heard yet but should any day . Just wondering how I’m going to react with going through WD. Nov 2018 Pregabalin 2x50 mg a day to help with Paxil WD. Aug 2019 2 x 25mg a day, April 2020 45mg, May 40mg, June 35mg, July 30mg, end July 25mg, Aug 24mg, June 2021 14mg, Jan 2022 14mg (2x7mg a day), Oct 10mg, Nov 5mg, December 25th 2022 0mg 🎈 Oct 2004 - Oct 2018 Paxil 20 mg, Nov 15mg, Dec 10mg, Feb 2019 7.5mg crashed, Feb 8.5mg, Nov 8mg, March 2020 7.2mg, April 6.5mg, May 5.9mg, June 5.4mg, July 4.8mg, Dec 4.5mg, Jan 2021 4mg, Feb 3.6mg, March 3.2mg, April 2.9mg, Aug 2.7mg, Sept 2.4mg, Oct 2.2mg, Nov 2mg, Dec 1.8mg, Feb 2022 1.6mg, March 1.4mg, April 1.2mg, May 1.0mg, June 0.8mg, July 0.6mg, Aug 0.4mg, Sep 0.2mg, October 6th 2022 0mg 🎈 December 25th 2022 drug free these dates are approximate Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rabe Posted February 23, 2021 Share Posted February 23, 2021 SO grateful to hear the virus effects are waning for you and hoping the same very soon for Monica! Your Trigger Warning was SO spot on...thank you for sharing it. I feel so not trusting a lot of this because of the short trials and all. Having become aware of what big pharma has done and continues to do makes it really hard to believe anything they say at this point. It seems to be mainly about the money and not helping others. I had to follow doctors orders for so many years in my job but I sure regret handing out the loads of medications that I did. I received the ingredients/print out of the Moderna and Pfizer vaccines today and was a bit stunned as it has been said by some that there are no preservatives in the Moderna because of the need to keep it cold. Was very interesting to look them over. Thanks again for sharing. You two take care!! -Nardil 1976 < year, stopped. React to AD's. Klonopin .5BID 1990, 2.5mg til 2016 -Klonopin doubled Jan '16. Taper to 2.25mg May to Nov '16. Bad react to Lexapro, stop. React to Prevacid too, taper off. -November '16 Tapered .25mg Klonopin in hospital. Jan '17 started Viibryd, 20mg from Feb to June '17, -20mg to 10mg Viibryd from 3/25 to 6/10 2017, 12/15 10% Viibryd taper...back up next day -Clonazepam 2mg to 1.85mg 4/14 '17 to end November; taper to 1mg Clonazepam in hospital 9/1 tp 9/14 '17 -Feb '18 Amiloride .25mg 5/18 off Amiloride d/t react. Clonaz compounded -4/27 '18 Viibryd 9.5mg, 6/11 9.0 mg, 1/27 '19 Viibryd 8.75mg, ; Clonazepam .2mg 530pm and .7mg 1130pm, Premarin .3mg 830PM CARAFATE QID 2/27/19 to 3/5/19 -July 6'19 1/2 10mg Claritin 230pm, stopped it about July 18, started Oct 11 '19, -7/27 Viibryd 8.5, 8/29 8.25, 10/24 8.0, 12/19 7.75, Feb '20 7.50, 3/20 7.25, 5/20 7.0, 6/20 6.75, 7/20 6.5, 8/20 6.25, 10/2 20 6.0, 11/25'20 5.75, 1/9/21 5.5, 2/23 5.25 -1015 AM Viibryd, vit D 4,000IU 130, 415 Clonazepam .2mg, 815 Premarin .3mg, 1015 Clonaz .7mg, 1115 3t fish oil+D 1145 Castor Oil 650mg(4) 1230 Carafate 1/2GM,Methylated B Vit 1/week,Reacted Mag prn Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator brassmonkey Posted February 25, 2021 Author Moderator Share Posted February 25, 2021 Well it's been a week since the second COVID shots and things have pretty well settled out on that front. Now I get to deal with some dental problems. I was meant to get some work done back in March when we got back from India. But the COVID situation put a damper on that. It has finally caught up with me in the form of a huge cavity and abscess and some rather intense pain. I've managed to get the pain under control, but finding a dentist to is the tricky part. Ends up that the dental plan under Medicare is pretty worthless around here because no dentists subscribe to Medicare. It looks like we get to foot the bill ourselves. At the least it is going to be a root channel and crown, but there is a good chance it will have to be an implant. So much for getting a new car. We've only driven about 1000 miles in the last 12 months anyway, so a new car would be a waste anyway. 20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013. Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks. The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better. Final Dose 0.016mg. Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017 "It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general." Stephen Hawking Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mentor Happy2Heal Posted March 5, 2021 Mentor Share Posted March 5, 2021 hi Brass, oh sorry your dental plan under medicare is useless. that's too bad. I hope you're not still in a lot of pain? actually I wanted to ask you specifically about pain and pain meds post zero on long term meds. and just your experience with drugs in general since getting off the psych meds I'm now over 3 yrs post zero and doing well in general however I am looking at a total knee replacement and am terrified about the pain AND the meds for pain. I don't have a lot of experience with heavy duty pain meds. I had demerol when I was hit by a car in 1974, that was before I was exposed to over 40 yrs of various psych meds after over 35 yrs on psych drugs, I was exposed to oxycodone given to me when I had my gallbladder removed. it did nothing for the pain and I was wide awake and wired for three whole days!!! I am terrified that whatever drugs they use for the TKR will do the same. I have a very low tolerance for pain in general, I think Maybe not, I'm not sure I do not take anything except the rare baby aspirin for my current knee pain. I use ice and rest it and just grit my teeth and hold my breath LOL Yeh I think my tolerance is low but my fear of drug reactions is very high LOL I am SO drug averse that I haven't even requested anything for the pain. do you have any experience and/or have you heard of other folks experiences when they are more or less fully recovered but had a long drug history? I don't know if the long drug history matters, even, maybe even short exposures can cause issues I don't know how to safely test out if I am going to have a bad reaction. I know I will be asking for a nerve block and not general anesthesia I am really scared for so many reasons. I have a deep seated mistrust of all things medical now. I will be insisting that they give me the names of EVERY single drug they might possibly give me including the antibiotics they use so I can run them done and also see if I've had them before and had trouble with them. I don't know what else to do to protect myself. But I've got a bit of time to figure it out, at least. it's bad enough they all treat me like a nut case because they have my full drug history which includes haldol and every dr thinks they know that means you were psychotic and "truly nuts".... so I get a lot of eye rolls and worse. yep hate drs, hate the medical system, and wish to god I didn't have to do this at all PLEASE DO NOT SEND ME PRIVATE MESSAGES, thank you. pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total) Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictal- plus brief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. First attempt to get off it was 2007- WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 2013 too fast taper down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs June of 2105, tapered again too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". felt ok until Sept, then acute WD hit!! reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106 Tapered off to zero by Oct. 2017 Doing very well. Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, age 63 Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content PRESENT DAYS: Loving life! ❤️ with all it's ups and downs Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator brassmonkey Posted March 5, 2021 Author Moderator Share Posted March 5, 2021 Hi H2H-- Well the procedure went very well, I've had several root canals and this was one of the best. That said, it's going to hurt for a while. There was/is a nice abscess that need to finish clearing up and all that poking and prodding has left things quite sore. So it will be a week or so. But, it's over and done with, except for putting on the crown which is nothing. It's been a day and a half and things are better than the first day so it is looking up. I have dealt with a number of different pain meds since I jumped to "0" and have had very little trouble with any of them. I have found that oxycodone is pretty worthless, it doesn't help the pain it just make you not care about it. The shots for the root canal didn't cause any problems, other members report having a lot of trouble with them but all of them were still tapering. I had some of the strong stuff in 2019/2020 for my kidney stone. I had morphine initially while being diagnosed and it was wonderful. Stopped the pain and no "hangover". That was followed by a general when they installed the stint and another general several months later when they went "Star Wars" on the stone with ultrasound and lasers. Neither of the generals caused any problems. I frequently take Tylenol for my arthritis with no problems and lately have been taking a combination of Tylenol and Advil for the tooth pain. Not problems there but I do worry about the effects on my kidneys and liver. But I will only be taking that for a short time. I was prescribed gabapentin for my shoulder, but didn't take it because of what I have learned from SA and the same goes for the Tramadol also prescribed for the shoulder. Which, by the way, has healed nicely on it's own over the past year or so. I can't guarantee anything but with your being off all drugs for three years, I don't think you will have any problems. There is a huge difference between doctors that prescribe psych drugs and those who do specialized surgery. The surgeons have helped renew some of my faith in the medical profession. I can't make any calls about what it will be like with a TNR, and wish you all the luck with it. Apace41 did both hips a year or so ago, he might have some insight there. 1 20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013. Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks. The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better. Final Dose 0.016mg. Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017 "It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general." Stephen Hawking Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JackieDecides Posted March 6, 2021 Share Posted March 6, 2021 On 3/4/2021 at 7:26 PM, brassmonkey said: with your being off all drugs for three years, I don't think you will have any problems. I hope this is true Currently taking Ramapril (blood pressure) 5 mg twice a day Omeprazole 10 mg AM and 20 mg PM (the taper has gone nowhere after the first cut) Famotidine once a day (and I still needs tums sometimes) magnesium 200 mg at night as of yesterday 2 fish oil capsules "EPA-DHA 1000" off Lexapro as of 5/2018 - last dose had been 5 mg every other day for a couple years highest dose had been 20 mg at which point I was diagnosed with Bipolar II, which went away when I cut the lexapro down to 15 mg. I spent years on Paxil before Lexapro (can't remember dose), briefly on Effexor and Abilify and others I have forgotten. in fact, when I was diagnoses with BPII I was put on all kinds of things which made me feel so bad I stopped them cold turkey within maybe 3 or 4 weeks, thank goodness. since then I've known these pills were terrible and I weaned down the Lexapro with zero help or support over I'm not sure how many years. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rupa Posted March 7, 2021 Share Posted March 7, 2021 On 3/6/2021 at 10:47 AM, JackieDecides said: I hope this is true There is no way,we can know. Other than brain withdrawal,any other body symptoms may or may not be related to withdrawal. Especially ,when they are pre-existing ,even before from this brain meds saga. For example,my long term , existed but only occassionally (twice in twenty years)worsen lower backpain troubled me continuously one year ,making me grounded to bed,after withdrawal. Then detected papillary carcinoma of thyroid,which might be existed from long term,but out reached after withdrawal. Cold turkeyed risperidone (1m.g)and trihexyphenidyl combination drug out of ignorance,In August 2016 after one month use. Withdrawal symptoms settled at dreamful,disturbing sleep. Thus introduced to olanzapine for sleep.Started using olanzapine out of ignorance. Tapering olanzapine 10 m.g from February 2017. May 2018 :Still suffering dreams,Still tapering olanzapine at 0.625.100ml water+2.5 mg olanzapine. June 2018 22.5ml=0.57mg.July 2018 20ml,August 2018-17.5ml,September 2018-15ml,October 2018 10 ml,December 2018 7 ml, BrassMonkey slide method so far at lower doses.2 nd December cold turkeyed , only to reach minure doses as reinstatement to cutshort endless tapering process.4rth December started 1ml. Almost no symptoms and sleep is better,So started 0.5 ml from 17-12-2018. "0"from31-12-18.Re birth happened from 10- 2020,as rejuvenation took whole2019.Completely recovered now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mentor Happy2Heal Posted March 8, 2021 Mentor Share Posted March 8, 2021 On 3/4/2021 at 10:26 PM, brassmonkey said: I can't guarantee anything but with your being off all drugs for three years, I don't think you will have any problems. There is a huge difference between doctors that prescribe psych drugs and those who do specialized surgery. The surgeons have helped renew some of my faith in the medical profession. thanks so much for your input Brass yes there's a big difference in surgeons vs psych drs etc, Unfortunately stigma regarding mental illness is the worst in the medical profession in my experience. I made the huge mistake of answering honestly questions regarding adverse drug reactions to meds- so now my records show that I was prescribed haldol. Not only does that flag me as mentally ill, but because I am on NO medications of any kind, drs think I must be an unmedicated mentally ill person. that is, a potential problem. Add to that being poor and on medicaid and I'm treated so incredibly poorly it's not even funny. PLEASE DO NOT SEND ME PRIVATE MESSAGES, thank you. pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total) Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictal- plus brief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. First attempt to get off it was 2007- WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 2013 too fast taper down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs June of 2105, tapered again too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". felt ok until Sept, then acute WD hit!! reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106 Tapered off to zero by Oct. 2017 Doing very well. Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, age 63 Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content PRESENT DAYS: Loving life! ❤️ with all it's ups and downs Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator Emeritus getofflex Posted March 8, 2021 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted March 8, 2021 @Happy2Healthis is wrong on so many levels. I'm sorry you are being treated like this. Please do not private message me. Only tag me for urgent questions about tapering and reinstating - thank you. ***Please note this is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a doctor who understands psych meds and how to withdraw from them, if you can find one. Lexapro Started Apr 15 2010 - 10 mg; started taper August 2017, recent taper info: Apr 2 '20 0.18 mg; Jul 16 0.17 mg, Aug 23 0.16 mg, Oct 7 0.15 mg, Nov 8 - 0.14, Jan 16 '21 - 0.13, Feb 7 - 0.12, Feb 22 - 0.11, Mar 26 - 0.10, May 21 - 0.09, June 15 - 0.08 Aug 16 - 0.07, Oct 6 - 0.06, Nov 21 0.05, Dec. 17 0.04, Jan 14 '22 0.03, Feb 19 0.02, Apr 18 0.01, May 15 0.005, Jul 8, 0.00. Psych Drug Free as of July 8, 2022!! Woohoo!!! other meds: Levothyroxine 75 mg magnesium in small amounts at 4 AM, before bed suppl AM: fish oil, flax oil, vit C, vit E, multivitamin, zinc suppl 8 PM: magnesium 350 mg, extended release vitamin C, melatonin 2 mg Paxil 2002 - 2010, switched to Lexapro 2010 Trazodone 50 mg. 2002 - 2019, fast tapered in 2019 Xanax 0.5 mg as needed 2002 - 2019, up to 3x weekly Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JackieDecides Posted March 12, 2021 Share Posted March 12, 2021 On 3/8/2021 at 6:47 AM, Happy2Heal said: I made the huge mistake of answering honestly questions regarding adverse drug reactions to meds- so now my records show that I was prescribed haldol. Not only does that flag me as mentally ill, but because I am on NO medications of any kind, drs think I must be an unmedicated mentally ill person. that is, a potential problem. Add to that being poor and on medicaid and I'm treated so incredibly poorly it's not even funny. that is so horrible. I hope you can find healthcare workers that take the time to listen to you and figure out you are better off than when you were "medicated"! Currently taking Ramapril (blood pressure) 5 mg twice a day Omeprazole 10 mg AM and 20 mg PM (the taper has gone nowhere after the first cut) Famotidine once a day (and I still needs tums sometimes) magnesium 200 mg at night as of yesterday 2 fish oil capsules "EPA-DHA 1000" off Lexapro as of 5/2018 - last dose had been 5 mg every other day for a couple years highest dose had been 20 mg at which point I was diagnosed with Bipolar II, which went away when I cut the lexapro down to 15 mg. I spent years on Paxil before Lexapro (can't remember dose), briefly on Effexor and Abilify and others I have forgotten. in fact, when I was diagnoses with BPII I was put on all kinds of things which made me feel so bad I stopped them cold turkey within maybe 3 or 4 weeks, thank goodness. since then I've known these pills were terrible and I weaned down the Lexapro with zero help or support over I'm not sure how many years. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mentor Happy2Heal Posted March 12, 2021 Mentor Share Posted March 12, 2021 2 hours ago, JackieDecides said: that is so horrible. I hope you can find healthcare workers that take the time to listen to you and figure out you are better off than when you were "medicated"! well if I had money and transportation I could maybe shop around but we have only two main options in this city and they are both exactly the same They are all a$$holes if you ask me. I work very hard to stay as healthy as I can so I'm able to limit my experiences with them but sometimes I just have no choice they can get away with it BECAUSE I have no choice, no money to sue, no advocates, etc and they know it. OH How I fantasize about having some rich benefactor who could swoop in and make it all right. but then see, it's still about the damn money. Money is power - the less you have, the less power you have. It has always made me feel that I was also "less than" as a person, which intellectually I know is BS but emotionally, it's where I live most of the time, feeling less than. ppl think it's the minorities who are discriminated against and who are disenfranchised and to an extent that is true, but it's also the poor - those groups overlap quite a bit, sadly and it's most especially the poor who have had the huge misfortunate of being labelled mentally ill PLEASE DO NOT SEND ME PRIVATE MESSAGES, thank you. pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total) Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictal- plus brief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. First attempt to get off it was 2007- WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 2013 too fast taper down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs June of 2105, tapered again too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". felt ok until Sept, then acute WD hit!! reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106 Tapered off to zero by Oct. 2017 Doing very well. Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, age 63 Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content PRESENT DAYS: Loving life! ❤️ with all it's ups and downs Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JackieDecides Posted March 13, 2021 Share Posted March 13, 2021 On 3/12/2021 at 9:04 AM, Happy2Heal said: ppl think it's the minorities who are discriminated against and who are disenfranchised and to an extent that is true, but it's also the poor - those groups overlap quite a bit, sadly and it's most especially the poor who have had the huge misfortunate of being labelled mentally ill I hear what you are saying, and don't disagree except I would say persons of color are absolutely discriminated against. I have found women, elderly, and obese people are also treated exceptially poorly by our medical professionals. of course once you are labelled "mentally ill" pretty much nobody is listening. and, as you say, there is a lot of overlap. Currently taking Ramapril (blood pressure) 5 mg twice a day Omeprazole 10 mg AM and 20 mg PM (the taper has gone nowhere after the first cut) Famotidine once a day (and I still needs tums sometimes) magnesium 200 mg at night as of yesterday 2 fish oil capsules "EPA-DHA 1000" off Lexapro as of 5/2018 - last dose had been 5 mg every other day for a couple years highest dose had been 20 mg at which point I was diagnosed with Bipolar II, which went away when I cut the lexapro down to 15 mg. I spent years on Paxil before Lexapro (can't remember dose), briefly on Effexor and Abilify and others I have forgotten. in fact, when I was diagnoses with BPII I was put on all kinds of things which made me feel so bad I stopped them cold turkey within maybe 3 or 4 weeks, thank goodness. since then I've known these pills were terrible and I weaned down the Lexapro with zero help or support over I'm not sure how many years. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mentor Happy2Heal Posted March 13, 2021 Mentor Share Posted March 13, 2021 8 minutes ago, JackieDecides said: I hear what you are saying, and don't disagree except I would say persons of color are absolutely discriminated against. oh yes for sure!! in some cases it's so blatant it just boggles my mind when ppl think discrimination doesn't exist I would add to your list, the homeless and those with addictions, also treated poorly. but then these days, it seems almost everyone is treated poorly. maybe everyone is just burnt out and has compassion fatigue PLEASE DO NOT SEND ME PRIVATE MESSAGES, thank you. pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total) Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictal- plus brief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. First attempt to get off it was 2007- WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 2013 too fast taper down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs June of 2105, tapered again too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". felt ok until Sept, then acute WD hit!! reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106 Tapered off to zero by Oct. 2017 Doing very well. Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, age 63 Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content PRESENT DAYS: Loving life! ❤️ with all it's ups and downs Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator brassmonkey Posted March 13, 2021 Author Moderator Share Posted March 13, 2021 @Happy2Heal @JackieDecides-- I think it's time to take this discussion to one of your own threads. 20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013. Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks. The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better. Final Dose 0.016mg. Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017 "It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general." Stephen Hawking Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mentor Happy2Heal Posted March 15, 2021 Mentor Share Posted March 15, 2021 On 3/13/2021 at 4:36 PM, brassmonkey said: @Happy2Heal @JackieDecides-- I think it's time to take this discussion to one of your own threads. so very sorry Brassmonkey I get to talkin and I don't notice anything else sorry!!!! PLEASE DO NOT SEND ME PRIVATE MESSAGES, thank you. pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total) Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictal- plus brief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. First attempt to get off it was 2007- WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 2013 too fast taper down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs June of 2105, tapered again too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". felt ok until Sept, then acute WD hit!! reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106 Tapered off to zero by Oct. 2017 Doing very well. Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, age 63 Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content PRESENT DAYS: Loving life! ❤️ with all it's ups and downs Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator brassmonkey Posted March 24, 2021 Author Moderator Share Posted March 24, 2021 I will be dropping off the grid for a few days. Monica and I are making an emergency flight to Cleveland to be with her sister, who is in hospice. Sorry for ending conversations and questions in the middle. I'll be back on when I can. 1 20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013. Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks. The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better. Final Dose 0.016mg. Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017 "It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general." Stephen Hawking Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rabe Posted March 24, 2021 Share Posted March 24, 2021 Im so sorry to hear about your sister-in-law, brassmonkey. Will be thinking about all of you! -Nardil 1976 < year, stopped. React to AD's. Klonopin .5BID 1990, 2.5mg til 2016 -Klonopin doubled Jan '16. Taper to 2.25mg May to Nov '16. Bad react to Lexapro, stop. React to Prevacid too, taper off. -November '16 Tapered .25mg Klonopin in hospital. Jan '17 started Viibryd, 20mg from Feb to June '17, -20mg to 10mg Viibryd from 3/25 to 6/10 2017, 12/15 10% Viibryd taper...back up next day -Clonazepam 2mg to 1.85mg 4/14 '17 to end November; taper to 1mg Clonazepam in hospital 9/1 tp 9/14 '17 -Feb '18 Amiloride .25mg 5/18 off Amiloride d/t react. Clonaz compounded -4/27 '18 Viibryd 9.5mg, 6/11 9.0 mg, 1/27 '19 Viibryd 8.75mg, ; Clonazepam .2mg 530pm and .7mg 1130pm, Premarin .3mg 830PM CARAFATE QID 2/27/19 to 3/5/19 -July 6'19 1/2 10mg Claritin 230pm, stopped it about July 18, started Oct 11 '19, -7/27 Viibryd 8.5, 8/29 8.25, 10/24 8.0, 12/19 7.75, Feb '20 7.50, 3/20 7.25, 5/20 7.0, 6/20 6.75, 7/20 6.5, 8/20 6.25, 10/2 20 6.0, 11/25'20 5.75, 1/9/21 5.5, 2/23 5.25 -1015 AM Viibryd, vit D 4,000IU 130, 415 Clonazepam .2mg, 815 Premarin .3mg, 1015 Clonaz .7mg, 1115 3t fish oil+D 1145 Castor Oil 650mg(4) 1230 Carafate 1/2GM,Methylated B Vit 1/week,Reacted Mag prn Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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