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RusTW

RusTW: Seroquel CT then reinstated

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manny03
3 minutes ago, RusTW said:

Sorry your mom lost her job. Financial stress can add to your withdrawals.

 

Hopefully during your next window you'll see more improvements in your sleep. Over the last few months my sleep is improved. Still can't take a nap in the day but I felt close a few times. Can you take a nap?

 

I see you live in Southern California I was at Angelino for 22 years. I live in Northern Nevada now close to my mom. I lost my pops in summer of 2016 that fall I started to develop the physical got symptoms I think due to the loss of my pops.

 

Hugs man for your pops. 

 

I agree that most of these issues begin to crop up when a traumatic event occurs. In my case, in 2012/2013  I was trying to shoot my thesis (I'm a film kid so you can pretty much guess what school I was going to in the Downtown LA area) though several people sabotaged my project. Due to that, I lost confidence of myself, I became anti social, depressed, weepy kid. Then, I began to develop my gut issues also - diarrhea or constipation. Then, once I graduated in 2014, I felt betrayed by my peers, and within a month of leaving school is when I had my first nervous breakdown. Sadly, to top it off, four months later, my grandfather passed away. Its'being hell ever since. Taking the medication I have to acknowledged helped a lot to get me  somewhat back to that confident kid of 2012.

 

During this period, I couldn't take naps anymore. I only sleep four hours a day. 

 

Funny enough, when I entered February of this year, and began to drink chamomile teas two times a day, I slowly began to regain my naps. Over the last two weeks, I've had three to five minuete naps. Almost everyday. So, it seems the teas are helping out somewhat through these withdrawals. 

 

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RusTW
17 minutes ago, manny03 said:

 

Hugs man for your pops. 

 

I agree that most of these issues begin to crop up when a traumatic event occurs. In my case, in 2012/2013  I was trying to shoot my thesis (I'm a film kid so you can pretty much guess what school I was going to in the Downtown LA area) though several people sabotaged my project. Due to that, I lost confidence of myself, I became anti social, depressed, weepy kid. Then, I began to develop my gut issues also - diarrhea or constipation. Then, once I graduated in 2014, I felt betrayed by my peers, and within a month of leaving school is when I had my first nervous breakdown. Sadly, to top it off, four months later, my grandfather passed away. Its'being hell ever since. Taking the medication I have to acknowledged helped a lot to get me  somewhat back to that confident kid of 2012.

 

During this period, I couldn't take naps anymore. I only sleep four hours a day. 

 

Funny enough, when I entered February of this year, and began to drink chamomile teas two times a day, I slowly began to regain my naps. Over the last two weeks, I've had three to five minuete naps. Almost everyday. So, it seems the teas are helping out somewhat through these withdrawals. 

 

I tried my hand at acting also when I was down there. You have to have really tough skin to be in that industry it's very cut-throat. I was doing pretty good but the pressure to get into the business wore me down and I just quit. I almost went to LACC to get a film degree but just gave up on that also.

Sorry about your grandpa. I think in The Perfect Storm of Chaos we can be thrown heavy into this mind State even during which I'm noticing on my window days I'm catching myself dealing with some of the things from the past so it won't come back to haunt me later when I'm out of this so I'm trying to combine getting through withdrawals and doing my own therapy on dealing with my past. Right now my mom is very sick also and she has a lot of financial responsibility I have to help her out with.

I think I may try the camomile tea that's a good idea. If I could only get my naps back I would be so happy. Within the last few weeks I was pretty close to doing what you're doing I'm not sure if I was sleeping because I was dreaming I don't know if that can happen within minutes of falling asleep but I would jolt awake after having visual images within a few minutes of napping.

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manny03
2 minutes ago, RusTW said:

I tried my hand at acting also when I was down there. You have to have really tough skin to be in that industry it's very cut-throat. I was doing pretty good but the pressure to get into the business wore me down and I just quit. I almost went to LACC to get a film degree but just gave up on that also.

Sorry about your grandpa. I think in The Perfect Storm of Chaos we can be thrown heavy into this mine State even during which Ross I'm noticing on my window days I'm catching myself dealing with some of the things from the past so it won't come back to haunt me later when I'm out of this so I'm trying to combine getting through with withdrawals and doing my own therapy on dealing with my past. Right now my mom is very sick also and she has a lot of financial responsibility I have to help her out with.

I think I may try the camomile tea that's a good idea. If I could only get my naps back I would be so happy. Within the last few weeks I was pretty close to doing what you're doing I'm not sure if I was sleeping because I was dreaming I don't know if that can happen within minutes of falling asleep but I would jolt awake after having visual images within a few minutes of napping.

 

Please do try the chamomile teas. In my case, they've helped. I drink Celestial Seasonings, Honey Vanilla Chamomile. It's Caffeine free, so it won't ramp your anxiety, instead, calm you down. Within three to four weeks you should begin to notice the difference, and perhaps start regaining some sleep/naps. 

 

I'd love to leave film world behind, though I have a degree. I sadly can't do that. I have to push through, and show these people they've messed with the wrong person. The reason I was targeted was due to I was the poor kid who got in due to my talent, and most of the kids going to the school I went, their parents paid the film school to get them in though didn't have the chops like I did. I was foolish enough to have an open heart and befriend them, and they knew exactly were to attack me. It worked.  Now some of them, who I personally helped are executives at HBO or shot films like last year's 'Searching'. Though, they screwed me over in the process. To this day I feel a certain rage towards them, since I should had helped myself, not them. Perhaps, I wouldn't be in the situation I am in. 

 

 

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RusTW
13 minutes ago, manny03 said:

 

Please do try the chamomile teas. In my case, they've helped. I drink Celestial Seasonings, Honey Vanilla Chamomile. It's Caffeine free, so it won't ramp your anxiety, instead, calm you down. Within three to four weeks you should begin to notice the difference, and perhaps start regaining some sleep/naps. 

 

I'd love to leave film world behind, though I have a degree. I sadly can't do that. I have to push through, and show these people they've messed with the wrong person. The reason I was targeted was due to I was the poor kid who got in due to my talent, and most of the kids going to the school I went, their parents paid the film school to get them in though didn't have the chops like I did. I was foolish enough to have an open heart and befriend them, and they knew exactly were to attack me. It worked.  Now some of them, who I personally helped are executives at HBO or shot films like last year's 'Searching'. Though, they screwed me over in the process. To this day I feel a certain rage towards them, since I should had helped myself, not them. Perhaps, I wouldn't be in the situation I am in. 

 

 

Good for you man don't give up. I'm in my mid-forties now so I think it's past me. I was the same also I came from a poor family but I'm very artistic and had natural Talent that just needed to be nurtured I had a really good teacher who had my back who actually works on Films and I just gave it up. I do a lot of creative stuff here tie my own fishing flies do paintings and drawings I still think about acting though.

It's a Small World in that industry and eventually you cross paths with everyone and it's hard to be friendly with some of those people that are very non-creative but you have to

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manny03
1 minute ago, RusTW said:

Good for you man don't give up. I'm in my mid-forties now so I think it's past me. I was the same also I came from a poor family but I'm very artistic and had natural Talent that just needed to be nurtured I had a really good teacher who had my back who actually works on Films and I just gave it up. I do a lot of creative stuff here tie my own fishing flies do paintings and drawings I still think about acting though.

It's a Small World in that industry and eventually you cross paths with everyone and it's hard to be friendly with some of those people that are very non-creative but you have to

I just hope my body and mind doesn't since I want to fight to the end. 

 

It was my last semester were my senior Cinematography professor who mentored me. At that time, I was already falling into a deep depression. I would ditch her class. Though, she realized what was happening. Instead of docking my grade, instead made me do the class exercises when I would come back. I was scared, though she showed me I was able to do great things. In the end, she told me, not to give a damn what other people say, just brush it off my back, and continue fighting. That's what I hold to at the moment. 

 

I agree. You have to be friends even with those who you personally find detestable. I know if I make it through this, I'll do my best, just to keep it professional as possible. 

 

 

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RusTW

That's good you got your teachers support. You must have potential. Keep going man.use this to get through this.

It's good experience to make you stronger. 

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manny03
1 minute ago, RusTW said:

That's good you got your teachers support. You must have potential. Keep going man.use this to get through this.

It's good experience to make you stronger. 

 

Two cinematography professors mentioned the same thing to me. Back then, I didn't believe it due to my low self-esteem. Though, now I hold to that in this trail period. 

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RusTW
1 minute ago, manny03 said:

 

Two cinematography professors mentioned the same thing to me. Back then, I didn't believe it due to my low self-esteem. Though, now I hold to that in this trail period. 

Man this experience will make you soar.You will achieve anything. 

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manny03
1 minute ago, RusTW said:

Man this experience will make you soar.You will achieve anything. 

I hope so. :) 

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RusTW

It's one industry that relies on life experiences. That you have now.Very unique experience that made you stronger .You will get there.its a good goal 

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RusTW

Notes

So it's been exactly a week since this recent wave has hit me. It feels like that intensity of the beginning of my withdrawals. The first few days of this wave was fatigue stomach pain and Mild anxiety. Throughout the days the fatigue and fog has gotten worse and the anxiety also lasting into the evening . I usually get a small window in the evening but then as we all know the morning brings lots of fun now.

I did make a larger cut on my Zoloft from 50mg to 37.5 since the beginning of the year and didn't have many problems in the beginning so I'm just hoping that that faster taper isn't catching up to me now.

I had to do this due to problems with acid reflux after I take Zoloft. I feel like this drug is destroying me from the inside out. I plan on holding this dose until at least May. January and February seem to be lower anxiety and lower symptoms aside from the GI issues.

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Rabe

Hope things get better for you SOON, Rus.  And hope your GI issues remain better.  Take care!

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RusTW
49 minutes ago, Rabe said:

Hope things get better for you SOON, Rus.  And hope your GI issues remain better.  Take care!

Hi Rabe I had a nice break for a while. It seems like everything is cycling through again. Yesterday we adopted a cat and when we took him home he escaped and got underneath the house and I had to go pull him out. LOL

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Rabe

WOW!  Glad you got him back...and that you didnt get stuck under there with him!  Little stinker!

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RusTW
6 minutes ago, Rabe said:

WOW!  Glad you got him back...and that you didnt get stuck under there with him!  Little stinker!

Lol I DO understand how he feels.holy crap I was under the house for 1 1/2 hours .I finally grabbed him.Lol focusing on that yesterday caused my wave to die down for the evening. It's usually the opposite

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RusTW

Day 8 Bad wave extreme anxiety fog fatigue headache. 

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Dejavu

Im so sorry, @RusTW. I can relate. In the middle of one myself right now. Reinstated 4 months ago and cannot get stable. One symptom lessens; another shows up. PGAD and anxiety (mostly about the PGAD, ironically) are the worst.

 

Thinking of you and sending healing energy!

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RusTW
1 hour ago, Dejavu said:

Im so sorry, @RusTW. I can relate. In the middle of one myself right now. Reinstated 4 months ago and cannot get stable. One symptom lessens; another shows up. PGAD and anxiety (mostly about the PGAD, ironically) are the worst.

 

Thinking of you and sending healing energy!

Sorry your struggling.time heals.we got to wait it out.pgad sounds like a crappy symptom. Hang in there.

Russ

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Rosetta

Thinking of you, Rus.  I'm sorry that you are in a bad wave.  Eight days seems like forever.  I try to tell myself that it isn't permanent, it will get better, it always does  . . . Over and over again.  Sometimes it helps.  I hope you can distract.  There's a show called Idaho From Above on either Netflix or Amazon Prime.  After I watched it one or two more shows like it were recommended.  It made me feel calmer.  There were no predators chasing prey scenes, and it was very peaceful.  

(((Rus)))

- Rosetta

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Carmie

Hi Rus, 

 

I’m really sorry you’re in a midst of a wave, yes those can certainly feel like they go on forever. Your cat story made me smile🐈

The naughty cat escaping and hiding under the house. I’m glad you got him back out. Cats can get scared in a new environment. When we first got our cat she kept hiding behind the sofas for a couple of days so we called her Heidi. Now, though, she thinks she owns the place! 😁 I’m glad you got a cat, animals are amazing and really amusing at the same time, great to watch when we’re going through withdrawals.

 

Take care, sending hugs🤗

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RusTW
1 hour ago, Rosetta said:

Thinking of you, Rus.  I'm sorry that you are in a bad wave.  Eight days seems like forever.  I try to tell myself that it isn't permanent, it will get better, it always does  . . . Over and over again.  Sometimes it helps.  I hope you can distract.  There's a show called Idaho From Above on either Netflix or Amazon Prime.  After I watched it one or two more shows like it were recommended.  It made me feel calmer.  There were no predators chasing prey scenes, and it was very peaceful.  

(((Rus)))

- Rosetta

Thanks Rosetta I'm gonna watch that.few days back I was under the house getting our new cat.he escaped.felt like a predator myself lol.

He's adjusting now.goofy as heck though. Nice addition to my new family. 

During w/d I started a new relationship. 

It's going good.a few bumps because of withdraw. She is good to me.im lucky

Rus

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RusTW
1 hour ago, Carmie said:

Hi Rus, 

 

I’m really sorry you’re in a midst of a wave, yes those can certainly feel like they go on forever. Your cat story made me smile🐈

The naughty cat escaping and hiding under the house. I’m glad you got him back out. Cats can get scared in a new environment. When we first got our cat she kept hiding behind the sofas for a couple of days so we called her Heidi. Now, though, she thinks she owns the place! 😁 I’m glad you got a cat, animals are amazing and really amusing at the same time, great to watch when we’re going through withdrawals.

 

Take care, sending hugs🤗

CarmieThat's funny Heidi.We named him squirrel .he's a tabby.same personality as me.We can chill out together when he adjusts. 

Waves suck.we can't feel better without them though .so onward

Russ

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manny03
9 minutes ago, RusTW said:

Thanks Rosetta I'm gonna watch that.few days back I was under the house getting our new cat.he escaped.felt like a predator myself lol.

He's adjusting now.goofy as heck though. Nice addition to my new family. 

During w/d I started a new relationship. 

It's going good.a few bumps because of withdraw. She is good to me.im lucky

Rus

 

I'm glad that person is able to see you through the W/D.  :) 

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RachelSusan

Ahhhhhh, Rus, I am indeed sorry to read you are in a wave.  I feel for you. I hope you new cat might be able to bring you some comfort.  Hopefully there are no more trips under the house.

Rachel

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RusTW

Im

1 minute ago, RachelSusan said:

Ahhhhhh, Rus, I am indeed sorry to read you are in a wave.  I feel for you. I hope you new cat might be able to bring you some comfort.  Hopefully there are no more trips under the house.

 

 

RS lol thanks a few minutes ago I found out he was trapped underneath the bed now in the bed springs. LOL I don't know who's nuttier me or him.

He is my buddy.0

Thanks RS

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Carmie
27 minutes ago, RusTW said:

CarmieThat's funny Heidi.We named him squirrel .he's a tabby.same personality as me.We can chill out together when he adjusts. 

Waves suck.we can't feel better without them though .so onward

Russ

 

Yes Rus, 

 

Look at all the lovely times you can share with your cat once she starts to get used to her new home. Heidi is not a sit on your lap cat, and she absolutely hates being picked up, but she loves lying right next to me. 

 

Yes, onwards and upwards in this journey. Windows and waves are all part of it. 

 

Enjoy the happy times with your cat💚

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RusTW
29 minutes ago, manny03 said:

 

I'm glad that person is able to see you through the W/D.  :) 

Thanks Manny I was lucky to find love in the middle of withdrawal. She knew I was in withdrawal when we first met. Everything is going well and she's a great support. All those feelings you get when you first meet somebody were incredible to feel after feeling so bad all these months. As things have progressed I feel deep love for her. Regardless of these crappy withwithdrawals

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Dejavu

That is wonderful! Sorrow shared is halved. Happiness shared is doubled. Glad you have found love during this difficult time. She sounds like a keeper!

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RusTW
35 minutes ago, Dejavu said:

That is wonderful! Sorrow shared is halved. Happiness shared is doubled. Glad you have found love during this difficult time. She sounds like a keeper!

Dejavu I like that.God sent me a angel for sure.She is definitely a keeper.

Thanks

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RusTW

@Gridley question for you. Last fall I tapered Seroquel from 50 to 37.5 successfully. At the end of December I started to experiencing GI upset which I believe is a side effect of my Zoloft. Given that I did a fast taper from the beginning of January to present from 50mg to 37.5 mg. During the month of January and February I had really good windows and low symptoms. Most of my GI problems faded out also. Some of the windows were so clear I felt like it was over. I would have intermittent windows and waves every 2 or 3 days and was sleeping pretty good. Low anxiety low fog. I know it's recommended the only taper 10% but I felt like I was suffering taking the Zoloft. It's always had bad effects on me it amps me up also after I take it. Given that info is it possible that this wave is from that last taper even though I had good windows. this wave I'm in right now feels like the one in the beginning. Any input would help thank you Gridley

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Gridley

 

9 minutes ago, RusTW said:

Given that info is it possible that this wave is from that last taper

 

Going from 50mg to 37.5 is a fast taper.   It is very possible that the current wave is from that taper.   Withdrawal symptoms can be delayed.

 

Delayed onset of withdrawal symptoms

 

It sounds like you had a "honeymoon" window at the beginning, which is not uncommon, and the wave you're experiencing is entirely normal.  Often it's one step forward, two steps back, etc., and repetition of previous withdrawal symptoms (that you thought you were finished with) is common.

 

When we take medications, the CNS (central nervous system) responds by making changes over the months and years we take the drug(s). When the medication is discontinued, the CNS has to undo all the changes it made. Rebuilding the neurotransmitter production and reactivating the receptor and transporter cells takes time -- during that rebuilding process symptoms occur.  
 

 

 

 

 

 

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RusTW
5 minutes ago, Gridley said:

 

 

Going from 50mg to 37.5 is a fast taper.   It is very possible that the current wave is from that taper.   Withdrawal symptoms can be delayed.

 

Delayed onset of withdrawal symptoms

 

It sounds like you had a "honeymoon" window at the beginning, which is not uncommon, and the wave you're experiencing is entirely normal.  Often it's one step forward, two steps back, etc., and repetition of previous withdrawal symptoms (that you thought you were finished with) is common.

 

When we take medications, the CNS (central nervous system) responds by making changes over the months and years we take the drug(s). When the medication is discontinued, the CNS has to undo all the changes it made. Rebuilding the neurotransmitter production and reactivating the receptor and transporter cells takes time -- during that rebuilding process symptoms occur.  
 

 

 

 

 

 

Thanks Gridley I appreciate that. I'm going to hold for a good while now and just tough it out. the honeymoon. Is an awful trick. Oh well. At least I got those windows

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Gridley
35 minutes ago, RusTW said:

I'm going to hold for a good while now

 

Sounds good.

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Rabe

Hi Rus...hope things improve for you with the hold!

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RusTW
6 hours ago, Rabe said:

Hi Rus...hope things improve for you with the hold!

Hi Rabe.Got a window last night. Ah relief. That was rough and intense.It should get better now.

Thanks Rabe

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Gridley
4 minutes ago, RusTW said:

Hi Rabe.Got a window last night. Ah relief. That was rough and intense.It should get better now.

Thanks Rabe

 

Glad you had a window.  I noticed in your signature you take a B-complex.   B vitamins can be activating (overly stimulating) to those in withdrawal.

 

Hypersensitive to B Vitamin or B-Complex  

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