lexapoison: 3 weeks off Lexapro / escitalopram

[LexAnger]

Please hold off. They most probably will mess you up even more. 

I PMed you if you can check your mail box.

[lexapoison]

I don’t have a choice I can’t continue like this for another day

[ChessieCat]

2 hours ago, lexapoison said:

I don’t have a choice

 

If you think that it is the drug which is causing the issues then you could stop the drug.  Please be aware that we are not medical professionals and provide suggestions.

 

From the reinstatement topic, for which the link was provided on 5th August requesting that you read Post #1:

 

On 10/9/2012 at 10:17 AM, Altostrata said:

How long should you give reinstatement?

• Unless you have an immediate bad reaction, observe your symptom pattern for about a week to see if the reinstatement is helping. It takes about that long for your body to fully register the addition of most neuroactive drugs. If you have an immediate bad reaction, reduce or stop taking the drug.
• After reinstatement, stabilizing on the drug varies according to the individual. Relief can be felt immediately, after some weeks, or after some months.
• A slight immediate improvement is a good sign, this probably will progress as the drug ramps up to steady-state over a week. Improvement often occurs in The Windows and Waves Pattern of Stabilization

 

On 10/9/2012 at 10:17 AM, Altostrata said:

When to discontinue reinstatement

• If, upon reinstatement, you very soon feel worse, most likely you are sensitized to the drug and need to take a smaller dosage or, possibly, none at all. You will need to track your daily symptom pattern to see if it's the drug causing your symptoms. If so, they generally will be worse shortly after you take the drug.
• Sometimes reinstatement does not work. The nervous system has taken such a hard hit from withdrawal, it's destabilized beyond whatever effect the drug might have had.
• You get an adverse reaction from the drug. Look up your drug at drugs.com to identify known adverse reactions. A rash is always a bad sign. Sometimes an adverse reaction can be eliminated by taking a lower dosage.
• If you have an immediate severe bad reaction, reduce or stop taking the drug

 

[lexapoison]

9:45am ate breakfast and took .25 mg celexa

9:45-3pm sat on couch on phone

3pm finally got up from couch and went to Walmart

4pm got home panicked and cried for hours to many people 

7pm calmed down a bit 

9pm started panicking again 

11:30pm getting ready to go to bed extremely tired 

 

Symptoms I felt randomly throughout the day new with reinstatement: numb penis, burning stomachache, burning chest, slight brain zaps, clogged ears and just feeling completely different than I ever have during my wd, I feel like I’m on 10mg of Lexapro it’s crazy. Also feel this dark cloud hovering over me. I can’t tell if reinstatement has made things better or worse.

 

Reoccurring symptoms: Panic, anxiety, akathisia, anhedonia, dr/dp, crying, constant intrusive thoughts and emotions, burning and pressure in forehead, pressure on sides of my head, fatigue, eyes feeling like I’m exhausted like they are burning.

 

 

 

[lexapoison]

I think reinstatement has made me worse or I’m just getting worse in general. Yesterday was probably my worst day ever and last night to now I’m on a different planet. Literally on a different planet haven’t been able to sleep.

[lexapoison]

I know lexapoison is a bad name. I regret choosing it.

 

My name is Alex. I live in Southern California. I’m 32 years old but I could fool you because I act like I’m 21 most of the time and love to play video games. I have an amazing family, life and girlfriend. I think my life is over, I can’t suffer for years like this. I am not strong like you guys. I admire you all.

 

 

[lexapoison]

Well it’s time to take my .25 of celexa to keep up with reinstatement. This will be day 3 of reinstatement, day 2 at .25 of celexa. Do mods or the people helping think it’s a good idea to continue with reinstatement?

[RichT]

3 hours ago, lexapoison said:

Well it’s time to take my .25 of celexa to keep up with reinstatement. This will be day 3 of reinstatement, day 2 at .25 of celexa. Do mods or the people helping think it’s a good idea to continue with reinstatement?

 

In my case, reinstatement worked. I reinstated a low dose of a different drug, Abilify, after I had severe suicidal ideation and dp/dr. It took  a week or two to really take effect, and I’ve continued to have withdrawal symptoms since but not on the same scale. Although there are unfortunately no guarantees it will work, In your situation I would certainly continue with your re-instatement for a while. 

 

Warmest wishes

 

Rich

Edited August 17, 2019 by RichT

[AlexRussia]

10 hours ago, lexapoison said:

Well it’s time to take my .25 of celexa to keep up with reinstatement. This will be day 3 of reinstatement, day 2 at .25 of celexa. Do mods or the people helping think it’s a good idea to continue with reinstatement?

Just read your lasts posts. i am not moderator, only moderators or experienced members (i am not) giving advices in such tricky situations. So what i say next its not advise its just my opinion.   If you really felt worse on such small dose and even got so many new symptoms , even numb penis, that very scary, especially for a man.  I think that real reason behind your withdrawal and your symptons is upregulation of 5ht1a serotonin autoreceptors.  These receptors lowers excessive serotonin.  I think that  your previous course of lexapro fails to downregulate these receptors and they became hyperactive. Like they become vaccinated   and they react to even such small doses by extremely lowering level of serotonin thats why you got new symotoms .  If i were your and my penis got numb after jiust 0.5 mg of celexa i would put celexa or any ssri to trash bin ,said that reinstatement failed and never ever took any ssri again. I myself failed to reinstate on different ssri and tricyclic . Fluvoxamine gave me blurred vision .. Clomipramine seizures, 1mg of lexapro - extreme burning and no sleep.  I would ask my.doc for atarax (25-50 mg) .  Its first generstion antihistamine, passes bbb,  it might help to sleep and relax.    ,  valerian root ,magnesium and melissa could help to but remember  that valerian is mild benzo.  If its not enough tbat u could try mirtazapine 7.5-15mg .    is evil drug , with many side effects and mirtapoison will be your next nickname but if u are desperate... 

[lexapoison]

Yeah I think I’m done w reinstatement I don’t think I should have taken it today. I am now in ER possibly going to mental hospital tomorrow.

[jozeff]

Alex, I am seriously very sorry for you man. I wish you all the best from the Netherlands!

 

It's disgusting that you have to go through this. Although I've never been to ER, I have had major changes in behavior, emotions, suicidal thoughts etc. 

 

Citalopram and Lexapro are evil.

 

Having read a lot on this website for quite a while I tend to think that you have been making a lot of dose changes during the last months.

Your reinstatement doesn't work for you right now, I don't know if it's the right dose. 4 days is obviously very short period.

 

If you decide to quit it might be yet another stressor for your brain. 

 

Maybe the mods can spread their wisdom here.

 

Since you are in ER right now I wish you strength and love. There must be someone there who can make a decision for you now. That's most important now. 

 

When you're feeling more stable it's time to discuss with your friends on this website.

 

 

 

For now, be strong! You were quite a happy person a few months ago! That person will and can not be gone forever.

 

You Will feel better!

 

 

Cheers

Jozeff

 

 

[lexapoison]

Is it okay to stop my reinstatement? I took .5mg, .2mg, .2 mg of celexa have not taken any today.

[ChessieCat]

Stopping your drug was mentioned above in this post: 

 

[lexapoison]

okay chessie thank you. Do you think I’ll get symptoms from such a small dose for such a small time?

[ChessieCat]

Unfortunately we don't know.  Your symptoms might change over the next few days or longer as the drug in your system reduces.

 

It is going to take time, longer than you think and/or want it to and it may be very frustrating.  It doesn't happen in a linear fashion but Windows and Waves Pattern of Stabilization.

 

The calmer you can be during this time, the better it is for your nervous system.  We strongly recommend that member learn and use non drug coping techniques as previously suggested here.

 

Acceptance

 

 

[ChessieCat]

Q:  Are you still in hospital?

 

Q:  Have you been given any drugs?  If yes, what?

[lexapoison]

I got out of the mental hospital by the skin of my teeth. I was on a 5150 and just was able to get out before they came to pick me up. They gave me two prescriptions I don’t plan on taking them at all but I am considering getting on Prozac or something because this is soo hard.

I’m home now but in bad shape.

[Altostrata]

On 8/15/2019 at 6:58 PM, lexapoison said:

Had a horrible wave followed directly by a window. If I get the green light tomorrow I almost feel I should switch to .25mg of lexapro (from what I understand to be the equivalent of .5mg of celexa) but I have no idea. My family is a heartbeat away from checking me into a psych ward and I can’t blame them.

 

Milligram for milligram, Lexapro is SEVERAL TIMES STRONGER than Celexa.

 

On 8/16/2019 at 8:42 AM, lexapoison said:

I feel different as in I can feel the medicine. I feel like I am medicated it’s hard to describe. And I know it sounds contradictory, it’s because I never feel better or worse it’s always just “different”.

 

The burning in my chest diminished significantly and I slept a pretty good amount last night. Woke up shaking. Main symptoms right now are anxiety with some panic.

 

So I continue with .5mg of celexa? I feel like it was too strong thoughts on a lower dose and taking lexapro instead?

 

The sleeping is a good sign.

 

On 8/16/2019 at 6:52 PM, lexapoison said:

My whole family and I have hit a wall and tomorrow I am being admitted to a hospital. Any tips? Just a few months ago I was a normal guy. Lexapro has ruined me.

 

 

 

 

You are an adult, it's up to you to make the decision whether to go to the hospital.

 

9 hours ago, lexapoison said:

Is it okay to stop my reinstatement? I took .5mg, .2mg, .2 mg of celexa have not taken any today.

 

What times of day did you take each of these doses? You will need to take the same amount at the same time of day over at least several days to gauge how reinstatement is working. You seem to have ups and downs over the several days you've tried this.

 

Please keep daily notes about what times of day you take your drugs, their dosages, and your symptoms throughout the day.

 

You'll have to keep calm through this process. Yes, you have withdrawal syndrome, you probably feel terrible. We know that. Most of the staff has experienced this. It's important not to add panic and worry about your symptoms to your symptoms, it increases the nervous system uproar.

[succubus76]

10 hours ago, lexapoison said:

I got out of the mental hospital by the skin of my teeth. I was on a 5150 and just was able to get out before they came to pick me up. They gave me two prescriptions I don’t plan on taking them at all but I am considering getting on Prozac or something because this is soo hard.

I’m home now but in bad shape.

Wow, is ridiculous how pyschiatry works, they put you on meds that mess you up even more, causes sexual dysfunction and emotional flatness, of course, you are going to feel terrible whit these symptoms, who woulnt? But weed is ilegal, lol

 

Edited August 19, 2019 by ChessieCat
reworded obscenity

[lexapoison]

Guys help. Last recommendation. I literally can’t continue like this. Will getting on a different AD have the potential to help me and then taper off later? I see a lot of people’s signatures and I see a lot of them getting back on AD after getting hit with WD hard and staying on them for years and then tapering off later. Lexapro was not good for me so it would need to be a diff AD. Please guys any advice would be amazing. 

 

 

5 weeks of Lexapro 10mg ending june 2019

2 weeks of Lexapro 5 mg ending in July 2019

2 weeks of Lexapro 2.5 mg ending in July 2019

0mg July 2019 5.5 weeks as of today 

 

Reinstated .5 mg celexa on 7/14, 2.5 mg on 7/16, 2.5 mg 7/17 adverse reaction

[lexapoison]

Actually reinstated on 8/14, 8/16, 8/17

[jozeff]

Hi lexapoison,

 

I don't honestly know if asking for another ad is recommended here.

I feel your suffering, I really do. Citalopram had an awful effect on me after a while.

 

I used venlafaxine for years and it helped me tremendously. That's  all I can say. I'm not telling you to take that. It's just my experience. 

 

You should really seek medical advice and talk to your psychiatrist. I know, that is not always successful but someone has to prescribe you something if that is why you want.

 

Is it possible for you to continue a very low dose of celexa and tough it out?

 

I know you need some quick succes here but a different ad may help but also might kick your a... some more.

We don't know..

 

I hope someone can spread their wisdom here for you

 

Wish you all the best.

 

Cheers

Jozeff

[lexapoison]

Thank you Jozeff. I’ve noticed now that I haven’t been on celexa for 4 days the derealization is starting to come back strong. That’s at least one good thing reinstatement did was kind of keep that at bay. Anhedonia and akathisia have steadily been strong before, during and after reinstatement. Thoughts on trying to stabilize on .1 mg mods? Has my reinstatement boat passed?

[lexapoison]

Topic title:  Question Lexapro Withdrawals

 

Is it a good sign if physical symptoms are going away? Is there any correlation between physical symptoms diminishing indicating psychological symptoms should be diminishing as well from your guys’ experience?

 

Edited August 22, 2019 by ChessieCat
added topic title

[Altostrata]

On 8/17/2019 at 8:49 PM, AlexRussia said:

Just read your lasts posts. i am not moderator, only moderators or experienced members (i am not) giving advices in such tricky situations. So what i say next its not advise its just my opinion.   If you really felt worse on such small dose and even got so many new symptoms , even numb penis, that very scary, especially for a man.  I think that real reason behind your withdrawal and your symptons is upregulation of 5ht1a serotonin autoreceptors.  These receptors lowers excessive serotonin.  I think that  your previous course of lexapro fails to downregulate these receptors and they became hyperactive. Like they become vaccinated   and they react to even such small doses by extremely lowering level of serotonin thats why you got new symotoms .  If i were your and my penis got numb after jiust 0.5 mg of celexa i would put celexa or any ssri to trash bin ,said that reinstatement failed and never ever took any ssri again. I myself failed to reinstate on different ssri and tricyclic . Fluvoxamine gave me blurred vision .. Clomipramine seizures, 1mg of lexapro - extreme burning and no sleep.  I would ask my.doc for atarax (25-50 mg) .  Its first generstion antihistamine, passes bbb,  it might help to sleep and relax.    ,  valerian root ,magnesium and melissa could help to but remember  that valerian is mild benzo.  If its not enough tbat u could try mirtazapine 7.5-15mg .    is evil drug , with many side effects and mirtapoison will be your next nickname but if u are desperate... 

 

Alex, thank you for trying to help lexapoison, I see you're working on a "chemical imbalance" theory. These theories have no merit or practical application to whatever people go through in withdrawal. It's not a matter of upregulating or downregulating receptors, the effect is throughout the body and its many hormonal systems.

 

14 hours ago, lexapoison said:

Topic title:  Question Lexapro Withdrawals

 

Is it a good sign if physical symptoms are going away? Is there any correlation between physical symptoms diminishing indicating psychological symptoms should be diminishing as well from your guys’ experience?

 

 

Stabilization after reinstatement, especially with a tiny reinstatement such as you've taken, can be very gradual. Reduction of physical symptoms is certainly a good sign.

 

You will need to be patient and support the stabiization process as well as you can. Panicking does not help. Stabilization will take a while, it may be very slow, you may have waves and windows of symptoms.

 

To help us out, follow these instructions Please put your drug and withdrawal history in your signature You may need to use a computer to do this.

 

[lexapoison]

Why do I constantly get these little sparks throughout the day of feeling like who I really am and little sparks of wanting to do things and of excitement just to get it immediately taken away. Is this normal? Do you guys always get these as well?

[ChessieCat]

They are called "windows".    Windows and Waves Pattern of Stabilization

 

Normal and a good sign.

 

 

Edited August 22, 2019 by ChessieCat

[lexapoison]

Even though it’s just a split second long and sometimes happens several times an hour?

[ChessieCat]

Check out the link I sent you.  Other members have experienced the same thing.

[lexapoison]

Topic title:  Lexapro Withdrawals - Vaping withdrawals sensitized me?

 

Finally know what happened to me guys. I was a regular person, no serious issues. When I quit vaping and caffeine cold turkey I threw my nervous system out of whack and sensitized it. I know this now because I know more about what a sensitized nervous system is. I was sensitive to certain types of foods, lights and sounds and even an OTC medication that I tried taking for a headache one night while I was withdrawing. I also was showing many signs of a sensitive nervous system. Here’s my story:

 

April 2019

 

Quit vaping nicotine in large amounts cold turkey and quit drinking energy drinks everyday: got hit with bad anxiety and lack of interest in things about a week later. Started getting windows and waves after a couple weeks but didn’t know what that was at the time. 

 

May 2019

 

Vaped Again after 5 weeks for 1 day: Didn’t Help.

 

Started Lexapro the next day for 5 weeks at 10mg: Had bad startup symptoms and adverse reaction when drug kicked in. 

 

June 2019

 

Tapered to 5mg for 2 weeks: Horrible withdrawal symptoms.

 

July 2019

 

Tapered to 2.5mg for 2 weeks: Horrible withdrawal symptoms.

 

0mg of Lexapro after the 4 week taper: Incredibly horrible withdrawal symptoms since.

 

August 2019

 

Tried vaping for 1 day, 3 weeks after quitting Lexapro and had a very adverse reaction including worse and new symptoms.

 

Tried reinstating Celexa .5 mg 4.5 weeks after quitting Lexapro for 1 day (felt the dosage was way too high), then .25mg for 2 days. Seemed to be an adverse reaction as I got new and worse symptoms though somethings got a tad bit better. Quit Celexa after the 3rd day. 

 

So here I am 6.5 weeks off of Lexapro and almost 2 weeks after the small reinstatement of Celexa and I am a mess.

 

I won’t list all the symptoms as there are way too many but the main ones are:

 

Akathisia - Where it is hard to stop moving and also includes grunting and moaning. Also a feeling of dread, doom, fear, despair, SI which I believe is part of the akathisia. I have these symptoms even when I’m not having the physical symptoms. The mental symptoms seem to be pretty constant where the movement symptoms seem to arise when I get too overwhelmed by my thoughts.  Any suggestions to help with this?

 

DR and DP - These are really strong as well, especially the DP. Sometimes I have no idea who I am anymore. Any suggestions to help with this?

 

Bad Burning/Pressure headaches - These come and go but when they come they are strong. The burning has even started moving into my face sometimes it’s so strong.

 

Sleep - I am usually able to go to sleep but I only sleep a couple/few hours but it feels like I’ve been sleeping for like 12 hours. Then the anxiety kicks in and I pretty much can’t go back to sleep.

 

Those are the worse of the symptoms. The first 2 being the absolute worst. The first 2 are so bad that I don’t really leave my house anymore. I’ve lost my job, family and friends because they all want me to go to the hospital and get on more meds. All I got is my mom and it’s a serious struggle everyday. I’ve been to the ER and was minutes away from being admitted to a mental hospital in which I was barely able to get out of. The symptoms are unbearable. Does anyone have any advice? I know the best advice is to just suck it up and let my nervous system repair itself but I don’t think I can take it. I take an Ativan every 4-5 days and it seems to really help. I’m thinking about getting on a benzo to help me through these withdrawals, especially the akathisia and taper off the benzo later once things stabilize a bit. Are there any success stories that this can get better sooner than later? At least bearable sooner than later where I am able to go out with friends and maybe get a job? I was only on lexapro for a short amount of time, I’ve read the article that talks about even though I was only on it for a short amount of time that it will still take a long time but I’m hopeful that it won’t. I don’t need to be absolutely perfect, I just need the symptoms to be bearable. I can’t even watch TV or play video games. Any advice/success stories are greatly appreciated.

 

Also I think it’s interesting looking back that vaping is what sensitized my nervous system to start with. But it was just anxiety and a lack of interest in things. What I’m in now is literally not human. I actually think I felt similar if not worse on the Lexapro/during tapering but it was numbing me to the point where it wasn’t effecting me as much.

 

Thank you guys.

 

Best,

Alex

 

Edited August 29, 2019 by ChessieCat
added topic title and reducec font

[ChessieCat]

merged 2 introduction topics

 

Please do not create any more new introduction topics.  Each member has only 1 topic where they can ask questions and journal their progress.  This keeps a member's history in one place and also becomes a case study for any medical professionals visiting the site.

[lexapoison]

Please read my last post. I am so lost. Do I try to reinstate say .1mg of lexapro and just try to stabilize on that and stay on that no matter what? Or do I just stick this out now and hope it will get better?

[ChessieCat]

I will ask the other mods for their assistance.

[Len189]

Some of your symptoms sound a lot like mine. Hope you are hanging in there and that you have some windows. It can be  absolutely unbearable. It must be really difficult to decide whether to reinstate or not in your situation (not an option in my case, I only took 1 pill).

[EthanC]

Hey lexapoison,

 

Stumbled upon your post even though I don't come here often anymore.

I took Lexapro/Escitalopram for ~9 years and feel mostly recovered.

 

My recovery story is posted below from May 2019:

 

My original post from 2017 is below:

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/16466-☼-ethanc-was-on-lexapro-for-10-years-been-off-it-for-7-months/

 

I feel for your situation... hope you find your way eventually.

 

All the best,

Ethan

 

[getofflex]

Hello Lexapoison.  I've been weaning off Lexapro for the past 2 years.  I'm down to 0.3 mg.  I use the liquid.  This Lexapro is wicked stuff.  I was on Lexapro for about the past 8 or so years, prior to that I was on Paxil.  Doc switched me to Lex because Paxil made me put on so much weight.  

 

At any rate, my suggestion to you is to please try not to think about how bad things are.  It will just compound your misery and suffering.  What really helped me was to read the posts on acceptance.  Also, go to youtube and search on "Claire Weekes".  She has a wonderful video about how to cope with anxiety drug free.  I'm praying for you, and hope you feel better.  

 

Please keep us posted and let us know how you are doing.