RM123: in need of help

[RM123]

12 minutes ago, nipsu said:

How about your anxiety and insomnia have these symptoms got any better? Maybe you should talk with your doc about your heartbeats.

No they haven’t unfortunately. Anxiety seems to have eased off a bit. But I haven’t been in school in group work so I may feel I’m anxious when I’m that situation. I’m hoping that won’t be the case. 
 

Insomnia has been really bad. I pray everyday I will get better. 

[RM123]

9 minutes ago, mstimc said:

RM

 

Other than the vague possibility you may have an ectopic heartbeat based on the opinions of some members here, what is convincing you that's the problem?  I'd think if you had a serious heat condition, after two weeks you'd be in a lot worse shape.  I can't tell you the number of times I saw my doctor with an array of bumps, lumps, lesions, and other symptoms that were nothing but anxiety sending my mind and body off an a wild goose chase.  

I don’t understand what is convincing me that is the problem? 
 

Its just that I feel a thump in my chest. Then I check my pulse for a minute and the thump matches with my heart stoping for a brief second then continuing to beat after that. Then it happens again after 5 secs, 10 secs. It’s constant. 
 

It is clearly happening because I physically feel it. It’s obviously not normal tho have my heart stop for a second and that what’s scares me. I’m scared I will be in heart medicines for my life, or even worse a catheter or pacemaker 

 

This whole withdrawl has made me ill. I wouldn’t of had this if I hadn’t if stopped my meds.  

[Altostrata]

On 12/18/2019 at 10:56 AM, RM123 said:

I got so caught up with the mirtzapine (I think I was on it for a year or more) and the insomnia withdrawal (that’s what I read about wd on it) I did not think to mention I also came off fluoxetine a few weeks before Mirt cold turkey (I couldn’t find Info of insomnia effects on this from wd) I was on it fluoxetine no issues for 10years. 60-40-20-10 mg taper over the years (not a 10%). I really can’t remember. I was on 10mg for a good year I believe. I had some brain zaps for the first week or so but that went away. 
 

Again my insomnia started happening after 8-12 weeks coming off mirt so that would be 14 weeks coming off fluoxetine. 
 

I really have screwed up and I made such a big mistake. Right now the only issue I’m having is insomnia. I feel like an idiot posting on here about this. I’m so ashamed. 

 

You're having regular abnormal heart thumps? How long has this been going on? Did you talk to your GP about it?

 

What drugs are you taking now? What is your daily drug schedule?

 

To help us out, follow these instructions Please put your drug and withdrawal history in your signature You may need to use a computer to do this.

[mstimc]

3 minutes ago, RM123 said:

I don’t understand what is convincing me that is the problem? 
 

Its just that I feel a thump in my chest. Then I check my pulse for a minute and the thump matches with my heart stoping for a brief second then continuing to beat after that. Then it happens again after 5 secs, 10 secs. It’s constant. 
 

It is clearly happening because I physically feel it. It’s obviously not normal tho have my heart stop for a second and that what’s scares me. I’m scared I will be in heart medicines for my life, or even worse a catheter or pacemaker 

Okay, assuming you can really feel this, which I think is hard for the average person to do, how about this...

 

And they're generally harmless...

 

 

Edited February 3, 2020 by mstimc

[RM123]

53 minutes ago, Altostrata said:

 

You're having regular abnormal heart thumps? How long has this been going on? Did you talk to your GP about it?

 

What drugs are you taking now? What is your daily drug schedule?

 

To help us out, follow these instructions Please put your drug and withdrawal history in your signature You may need to use a computer to do this.

@Altostrata I have been waiting to hear from you.  Yes I am having irregular heart thumps. This will be the second consistent week. I noticed thumps the first week in my chest but thought nothing of it. Then I was like hmm this is different and feels odd so I decided to check my pulse against it at my neck and noticed when the thump happened my heartbeat paused at the same time then would continue to beat normally. It’s happening as we speak. 
 

I have not been to the GP because I’m anxious about what it will be. If they start putting me on those nasty drugs that I will have to be on for life or eventually taper. Or worse a catheter or pacemaker. I’m just hoping it will subside just like everything else I want to subside. 
 

I cold turkey 20mg fluoxitine in Aug and then 15mg mirtazapine in sept. I started getting insomnia in Oct and it has just been downhill from there. 1-2hrs of sleep a night and now it seems as if more complications are happening such as the abnormal heartbeat and now bloating. I’m just so exhausted. I want this to end. 

 

I panicked about the insomnia and reinstated 7.5mg in dec which was a bad move and is when I found SA. I’m breaking the pills in half as they have a line and taking it before bedtime. I have bought a scale but it is not accurate at all so I’m guessing with the amount it could not be an even 7.5mg. I cant get access to a good scale. 
 

I will update my signature when I can get to a computer. 
 

Thank you for replying. 

[RM123]

1 hour ago, mstimc said:

Okay, assuming you can really feel this, which I think is hard for the average person to do, how about this...

 

And they're generally harmless...

 

 

I actually truly can feel it. I have it even on days when I don’t exercise, I am feeling anxious and stressed and I hope it’s down to that and nothing more. 
 

I’m hoping they are harmless and don’t need to see my Dr

[Happy2Heal]

1 hour ago, RM123 said:

I actually truly can feel it. I have it even on days when I don’t exercise, I am feeling anxious and stressed and I hope it’s down to that and nothing more. 
 

I’m hoping they are harmless and don’t need to see my Dr

sounds like PVCs and/or PACs (other terms for ectopic beats-)which are incredibly common and harmless.

 

Drs told me that a certain percentage of ppl can feel them, and the rest never do.

I'm one of those ppl who can feel them.  yeh lucky me! 

 

The ppl who notice them are the ones that tend to worry about them and worrying about them could potentially make them more frequent. So if you can, trust that they truly are harmless and try to ignore them.

 

you'll often find that if you get busy with other things you won't even notice them any more, or you'll suddenly realize that they've stopped.

 

 

 

 

[nipsu]

I suffered insomnia for 2 years. It started in december 2017 when i had too much stress and anxiety. At first insomnia was manageable but in april 2018 it started get worser and worser. When summer 2018 came i couldnt sleep for many days in row at all and everybody could see that i am not doing well. It got little bit better during summer and i went to vacation in Greece where i slept 7-8 hours every night which helped me to gain some energy back. Soon after the vacation insomnia came back and again going worser. From november 2018 to february 2019 between that period i had probably average of 1-3 hours of sleep everynight and i got sleep paralysis + hypnagocic hallucinations when i tried to sleep because i was severely sleep deprived. I was probably close to death (atleast brain dead). I couldnt speak, i didnt know why i am anxied or if i am sad or happy. I didnt have nothing feelings at all. I started to bloat, my face was all the time red and had many other physical and mental symptoms. During that four months period i had probably two weeks without any sleep and then i started seeking help. In march 2019 i started to sleep like 3 hours a night and it started to get better. Now my sleep has improved and i can sleep like 6 hours and sometimes 7 hours. I know its not the healthiest amount of sleep but its still significant improvement compared to sleep which i had before. And i know it will get better i just try to concertrate to things which make happy. i know how terrible it is when you lose your ability to think, concentrate and function normally.

[RM123]

21 minutes ago, nipsu said:

I suffered insomnia for 2 years. It started in december 2017 when i had too much stress and anxiety. At first insomnia was manageable but in april 2018 it started get worser and worser. When summer 2018 came i couldnt sleep for many days in row at all and everybody could see that i am not doing well. It got little bit better during summer and i went to vacation in Greece where i slept 7-8 hours every night which helped me to gain some energy back. Soon after the vacation insomnia came back and again going worser. From november 2018 to february 2019 between that period i had probably average of 1-3 hours of sleep everynight and i got sleep paralysis + hypnagocic hallucinations when i tried to sleep because i was severely sleep deprived. I was probably close to death (atleast brain dead). I couldnt speak, i didnt know why i am anxied or if i am sad or happy. I didnt have nothing feelings at all. I started to bloat, my face was all the time red and had many other physical and mental symptoms. During that four months period i had probably two weeks without any sleep and then i started seeking help. In march 2019 i started to sleep like 3 hours a night and it started to get better. Now my sleep has improved and i can sleep like 6 hours and sometimes 7 hours. I know its not the healthiest amount of sleep but its still significant improvement compared to sleep which i had before. And i know it will get better i just try to concertrate to things which make happy. i know how terrible it is when you lose your ability to think, concentrate and function normally.

Hi thanks for sharing that with me. 2 years is such a long time. In really hope mine will not be that long. 

 

I have been sleeping 1-3hrs for the last 3-4 months now. I am very sleep deprived. Are you saying I am close to death or brain dead? Sometimes I have a hard time speaking intellectually. And it’s hard for me to understand other. It just doesn’t register in my brain. 

 

This has really scared me now reading this. 
 

I used to sleep like baby. 8-10hrs easy. I would be happy to get 6hrs right now. I wonder if I will ever sleep again like I used too. I miss it. 
 

Nothing makes me happy right now. I have have no excitement for life. I feel like a different person and it’s such a shame. 
 

What did you do to get help for your insomnia? 

[Happy2Heal]

3 hours ago, RM123 said:

Hi thanks for sharing that with me. 2 years is such a long time. In really hope mine will not be that long. 

 

I have been sleeping 1-3hrs for the last 3-4 months now. I am very sleep deprived. Are you saying I am close to death or brain dead? Sometimes I have a hard time speaking intellectually. And it’s hard for me to understand other. It just doesn’t register in my brain. 

 

This has really scared me now reading this. 
 

I used to sleep like baby. 8-10hrs easy. I would be happy to get 6hrs right now. I wonder if I will ever sleep again like I used too. I miss it. 
 

Nothing makes me happy right now. I have have no excitement for life. I feel like a different person and it’s such a shame. 
 

 

 

I am so sorry you're going thru this @RM123 it's very upsetting for sure

 

I think insomnia is one of the most common WD recovery symptoms. It can seem quite alarming, esp when you're awake and also feeling miserable, or not feeling anything at all.

 

When I was going thru this, I did extensive research on sleep and insomnia and what I found out helped me and I  hope it will help you!
Sleep is considered a primal drive- your body will shut down, at least parts of it will, including parts of your brain, in order to get the rest it needs.

You may be totally unaware of those little "shut downs" (some are so short they are called micro sleeps)

 

there is, in fact, no evidence that anyone has died from actual lack of sleep. Yes sleep deprived individuals are more prone to be in an accident, maybe fall asleep at the wheel while driving, etc but that's not the same as dying from lack of sleep.

 

I just checked again and there is no verified case of a person dying from lack of sleep.

 

Worrying about getting sleep can make it harder to get to sleep.

 

I was worried, as you are, that the lack of sleep was serious but it isn't, really.

It's uncomfortable, it's not fun, it's exhausting, it's a lot of things, but  generally speaking, it's not serious for your health.

 

we hear all the time about how important sleep is, but you need to tune that out. It's not going to help you relax. You need as much REST as you can get, but you don't have to worry about sleep.

 

so rest when you can!!  

Trust the sleep experts who say that your body WILL sleep when it needs to, and trust that you ARE going to be able to sleep normally again.

 

I am able to sleep normally now, after over 4 decades on all kinds of psych drugs with many CTs and rapid tapers.

Many others who have gone thru WD recovery  have also regained the ability to sleep like they had in the past.

I firmly believe you will get there too.

 

 

Try not to stress about it ok?

 

while you should probably try to stick to a regular sleep cycle, if you're feeling exhausted and think you can rest, lay down when you can. at least, that's what I ended up doing and it really did  help me to function better.

 

 

[RM123]

On 2/4/2020 at 10:36 PM, Happy2Heal said:

 

 

I am so sorry you're going thru this @RM123 it's very upsetting for sure

 

I think insomnia is one of the most common WD recovery symptoms. It can seem quite alarming, esp when you're awake and also feeling miserable, or not feeling anything at all.

 

When I was going thru this, I did extensive research on sleep and insomnia and what I found out helped me and I  hope it will help you!
Sleep is considered a primal drive- your body will shut down, at least parts of it will, including parts of your brain, in order to get the rest it needs.

You may be totally unaware of those little "shut downs" (some are so short they are called micro sleeps)

 

there is, in fact, no evidence that anyone has died from actual lack of sleep. Yes sleep deprived individuals are more prone to be in an accident, maybe fall asleep at the wheel while driving, etc but that's not the same as dying from lack of sleep.

 

I just checked again and there is no verified case of a person dying from lack of sleep.

 

Worrying about getting sleep can make it harder to get to sleep.

 

I was worried, as you are, that the lack of sleep was serious but it isn't, really.

It's uncomfortable, it's not fun, it's exhausting, it's a lot of things, but  generally speaking, it's not serious for your health.

 

we hear all the time about how important sleep is, but you need to tune that out. It's not going to help you relax. You need as much REST as you can get, but you don't have to worry about sleep.

 

so rest when you can!!  

Trust the sleep experts who say that your body WILL sleep when it needs to, and trust that you ARE going to be able to sleep normally again.

 

I am able to sleep normally now, after over 4 decades on all kinds of psych drugs with many CTs and rapid tapers.

Many others who have gone thru WD recovery  have also regained the ability to sleep like they had in the past.

I firmly believe you will get there too.

 

 

Try not to stress about it ok?

 

while you should probably try to stick to a regular sleep cycle, if you're feeling exhausted and think you can rest, lay down when you can. at least, that's what I ended up doing and it really did  help me to function better.

 

 

Thank you for this message. It’s nice to know lack of sleep will not cause death. I’m just worried about the complications that lack of sleep can bring to my health. 
 

I need my brain to be functioning right now so I can graduate and get my degree. But it’s hard to think. I’m so tired and it’s hard to get my point across and understand what others are saying. It’s really getting me down. I’m falling so behind. 
 

Lack of sleep is very uncomfortable. It feels like absolute torture. I’m trying not to worry about sleep.
 

I try to stick to a regular sleep pattern. And I can’t rest as my days are so busy, I have no choice.  Also if I rest my, I close my eyes and fall asleep for a split second which affects my sleep at night time. So I’m trying to avoid that. 
 

Im really hoping I can sleep again. Did it take you four decades to sleep again normally? 

 

[RM123]

Guys I’m feeling absolutely miserable this morning. Did not sleep a wink, tossing and turning in bed. I’m absolutely shattered. I feel like I’m running on fumes and adrenaline. 
 

I’m not coping well with this lack of sleep and don’t know how much longer I can take it. 

[nipsu]

I know this feeling man. Its probably the most terrible feeling you can have. You will get past this. It wont take 4 decades to get rid off insomnia. You are young and you will heal faster from this. I recommend that you look for therapist which can help you with insomnia. How often do you exercise and what time during day? Also what kind of exercise do you do? My insomnia got worser when i lifted weights. I stopped going gym for few weeks and i changed to cardio/aerobic/swimming exercise which helped me.

[Rozon1]

@RM123 bro I am in the exact same boat you are. I’m this sucks. I’m literally lying awake right now at 3 am unable to sleep. Can someone give us reassurance? 

[mstimc]

13 minutes ago, Rozon1 said:

@RM123 bro I am in the exact same boat you are. I’m this sucks. I’m literally lying awake right now at 3 am unable to sleep. Can someone give us reassurance? 

Rozon

Check some of the previous posts, especially the one from @Happy2Heal.  Insomnia is terrible, but it won't kill you or cause permanent damage.  The more you struggle to sleep, the less chance you have of sleeping--it just causes more anxiety and keeps you awake.  When I struggle with insomnia, I do a number of things to calm myself; read a book on Kindle--one I've read before so I don't build anticipation; get up ans turn on the TV to something diverting.  Pray. Anything to to stop worrying about sleep.

 

[Happy2Heal]

9 hours ago, RM123 said:

Did it take you four decades to sleep again normally?

oh good heavens NO

I was on psych drugs for over 4 decades, NOT going thru WD that long

 

returning to normal sleep was a gradual process.

I'd say the worst of the insomnia was over in a couple of months though.

 

Quote

"I need my brain to be functioning right now so I can graduate and get my degree. But it’s hard to think. I’m so tired and it’s hard to get my point across and understand what others are saying. It’s really getting me down. I’m falling so behind."

is there any way you could take a bit of time off?

[RM123]

8 hours ago, Rozon1 said:

@RM123 bro I am in the exact same boat you are. I’m this sucks. I’m literally lying awake right now at 3 am unable to sleep. Can someone give us reassurance? 

I literally screwed my entire life coming off these meds. If only I knew. I’m so sick and tired of it. Everything has been affected. 

[Happy2Heal]

24 minutes ago, RM123 said:

I literally screwed my entire life coming off these meds. If only I knew. I’m so sick and tired of it. Everything has been affected. 

I know it feels like that, now, but it will get better

 

 

it's not an easy road and it's def not a short one but most (if not all) of us get thru this eventually

 

according to one book I read, the average time to heal (fully) is 18 mos, so that would mean some heal faster and others maybe a bit slower

[RM123]

2 hours ago, Happy2Heal said:

oh good heavens NO

I was on psych drugs for over 4 decades, NOT going thru WD that long

 

returning to normal sleep was a gradual process.

I'd say the worst of the insomnia was over in a couple of months though.

 

is there any way you could take a bit of time off?

How did your sleep return? My insomnia has been going on now for 3-4 months. I’m really not coping well with it. It affecting my entire life. Everything has gone down hill since. I’m so upset with myself for coming off these meds. I wish I could take back time. If one thing in life that I could, it would be this. 
 

Unfortunately I can’t take time off because this is my whole future. Which right now I don’t think I will get because I can’t even think properly anymore

 

[RM123]

My dr wants me to go on 30mg of mirtzapine because she thinks my depression and anxiety has to do with my insomnia and not the WD. I’m currently stabilising on 7.5mg 

 

What are your thought? Will going back on mirtzapine bring my sleep back since the “depression and anxiety” will be taken care of 

[RM123]

14 minutes ago, Happy2Heal said:

I know it feels like that, now, but it will get better

 

 

it's not an easy road and it's def not a short one but most (if not all) of us get thru this eventually

 

according to one book I read, the average time to heal (fully) is 18 mos, so that would mean some heal faster and others maybe a bit slower

Just wanted to say thanks for messaging and taking your time. 
 

That’s the things. It is not an easy road and only realising now that this can go on for a long time. I really don’t think I can cope with that. This carries on. I don’t graduate, I don’t work. I need to be on my toes to do those things and be able to think. How will I survive not working. I can’t. 
 

I’m stabalising at 7.5mg Mirtzapine atm so I don’t know when I’ll heal. 

[Happy2Heal]

I understand how hard this is, we all do, and I'm very sorry you're going thru this

 

please try not to think too far into the future, for one thing, no one knows what the future holds, ok?

 

all you need to get thru is the next few minutes, the next hour or the next day

 

 

really, if you can force yourself to think this way, the time will pass by and you'll be a lot less distressed

 

it may not seem like it now, but it does go by rather fast. It seems like only yesterday when I was exactly where you are, regretting ever even trying to get off the damn AD!
 

but I don't regret it now. I am very very glad I did it

 

it was hard, that's true, but it was worth it, at least for me

 

 

 

 according to your signature you are holding now at 7.5mgs is that right? and you just reinstated in Dec? it's not been very long, you'll likely start to feel better soon

 

many of us have found that just when it seems you can't tolerate a symptom any longer, boom, it's gone, or at least greatly diminished

We come to think of the symptoms of the signs that your brain is doing the work of healing

 

symptoms are unpleasant, but it means you're on your way to recovery and this is a good thing

 

I hope that you can stick it out but you need to do what is right for you. 

 

 

[RM123]

4 minutes ago, Happy2Heal said:

I understand how hard this is, we all do, and I'm very sorry you're going thru this

 

please try not to think too far into the future, for one thing, no one knows what the future holds, ok?

 

all you need to get thru is the next few minutes, the next hour or the next day

 

 

really, if you can force yourself to think this way, the time will pass by and you'll be a lot less distressed

 

it may not seem like it now, but it does go by rather fast. It seems like only yesterday when I was exactly where you are, regretting ever even trying to get off the damn AD!
 

but I don't regret it now. I am very very glad I did it

 

it was hard, that's true, but it was worth it, at least for me

 

 

 

 according to your signature you are holding now at 7.5mgs is that right? and you just reinstated in Dec? it's not been very long, you'll likely start to feel better soon

 

many of us have found that just when it seems you can't tolerate a symptom any longer, boom, it's gone, or at least greatly diminished

We come to think of the symptoms of the signs that your brain is doing the work of healing

 

symptoms are unpleasant, but it means you're on your way to recovery and this is a good thing

 

I hope that you can stick it out but you need to do what is right for you. 

 

 

Thank you. 
 

I’m trying not to think to far ahead but this really is my future. It will provide with everything I need to live. It’s my dream to be what I’m working towards a degree for. But I’m really falling behind because of all of this. 
 

There’s a lot on my mind. A lot. 
 

Yes been holding since December but I’m breaking the pills in half and I don’t know if they are even which I’m sure doesn’t help. I don’t have access to a good scale. The one I bought jumps around and is not accurate at all. 
 

My dr wants me to up my mirtzapine to 30mg because she thinks that if my anxiety and depression are under control then my sleep will come back. I don’t know what to believe. Told her I was worried about potential side effects because I’m destabilised. She just said then you can just stop. What are earth do these Dr’s learn?!!!

 

i would love for my insomnia to be gone. I used to sleep like a baby. I loved sleep. I could easily sleep 11hrs straight. I’d been happy to get 6hrs a night but I wasn’t never even rested at 8hrs before WD. 

 

I’m just extremely fed up. I look absolutely sick. I look like a completely different person. My face looks wrecked. So tired looking. Aged 20 years. Red eyes, blood vessels. I’ve noticed that if I get a cut it takes so long to heal now. Just so many things. 
 

What’s right for me and something I think about everyday bus giving up. I have no quality of life. 

[Happy2Heal]

4 hours ago, RM123 said:

I’m trying not to think to far ahead but this really is my future. It will provide with everything I need to live. It’s my dream to be what I’m working towards a degree for. But I’m really falling behind because of all of this. 

 

 

OK humor me for a minute- let's say you were crossing the street and got hit by a bus, you know, that proverbial bus.

and  you were in the hospital with a bunch of broken bones or maybe a head injury and you needed months of rehab.

 

You'd need to adjust your plans, you wouldn't be able to continue your studies, right? You would have no choice. You wouldn't like it but you would have to accept it. Just a bad twist of fate.

 

others outside of this forum may not understand, but ALL of us here DO understand, what you're going thru, what we went thru, in WD recovery can be just as debilitating as any serious injury or illness. it's another bad twist of fate in a way. Most of us had no clue how hard this was going to be. 

 

I don't know if your grades are suffering, perhaps you're not doing as badly as you fear...? but let's say your grades aren't what you want them to be, and you're too tired to study and retain what you learn, this is  not going to be good for your career in the long run, either. You may be better off to take some time off and go back when your head is clearer and you're more rested.... perhaps.

 

Sometimes life takes detours that we hadn't planned on. THIS definitely classifies as one of those unexpected detours.

 

Many of the ppl on this forum have had to quit work, take sick time or a (usually unpaid) vacation, or cut down their hours, or make changes to their duties.

but  WD recover is not forever, it does end.

 

and symptoms typically aren't that severe for most of the time.

4 hours ago, RM123 said:

I used to sleep like a baby. I loved sleep. I could easily sleep 11hrs straight.

oh me too!! I had no trouble falling asleep and staying asleep. It was my escape from reality. It's very hard to accept the insomnia that comes with WD recovery. But I found that accepting it, and even expecting it, made me less angry as well as less anxious about getting sleep. 

 

4 hours ago, RM123 said:

I’m just extremely fed up. I look absolutely sick. I look like a completely different person. My face looks wrecked. So tired looking. Aged 20 years. Red eyes, blood vessels. I’ve noticed that if I get a cut it takes so long to heal now.

 I'm sure you are fed up!! this is a very tough thing to get thru, very tough. I lost over 60lbs in a few months, I didn't look anything like myself, I aged about 20 yrs It seems!  my skin was fragile and I either couldn't sweat at all, or I was sweating buckets, no inbetween

 

these symptoms, and others, of WD recovery were awful. I'm very sorry for you and for all of us, that had to go thru this. We were lied to about the safety of these drugs, we are still lied to about the difficulty in getting off of them. We have a lot to be angry about.

 

but you don't strike me as a person who gives up easily. You come across as someone very strong and determined, you've got big goals for your life. 

I'm sure you don't like this terrible detour in your life, but I'd bet you anything you can get thru it.

I remember waking up each day thinking about how much I hated what was happening to me, and how much I just wanted it to end.

 

This  mindset just made me miserable.

 

I looked around at the thread of others going thru WD recovery and saw that a lot of folks had far worse symptoms than I did. Some of them were also struggling with full time jobs, moves, serious financial issues, deaths in the family, sick parents, disabled kids, ALL sorts of other troubles, on top of withdrawal.

 

and they were getting thru it, some with incredible grace and courage.

I realized then that I had a LOT to be grateful for, so I decided to wake up each day and just be happy to be alive, and to be glad that things were not be as bad  as they could have been.... and I started noticing all kinds of real and good things to be grateful for.

 

WD is hard but it's not the hardest or worst thing that can happen to someone. 

 

you've got the whole rest of your life ahead of you! ❤️

 it may not seem like it now, but this will be just a tiny blip in that life.

really!

[RM123]

I’ve noticed my anxiety is getting the best of me. I feel like it’s debilitating and I’m having a hard time coping. I have a lot of stresses right now and it doesn’t help that my anxiety is crippling.  
 

I really don’t know what to do. Do I go back on antidepressants or will they make me worse? I’m really stuck. 

[nipsu]

How many hours do you get sleep at night compared to what you had before? If your sleep is still the most anxiety increasing symptom i would recommend take medicine for it for few months and then if you feel better quit slowly medication which you took for insomnia. About year ago i started mirtazapine for insomnia and it helped to reduce anxiety which insomnia caused and it helped me to sleep. I am now withdrawing it because i dont need it anymore. My sleep is alot better compared to what it was year ago. Maybe you could try temazepam or quetiapine for your insomnia. I am not doctor so i dont know what medicine works for your insomnia but probably something which reduces your anxiety significant ly.

[RM123]

My accupunturist has recommended I take pottasium to help with sleep. What are your thoughts? 

[Happy2Heal]

16 hours ago, RM123 said:

My accupunturist has recommended I take pottasium to help with sleep. What are your thoughts? 

since too much or too little potassium can have serious consequences, I'd not take any supplements 

 

there is some research that hints that potassium may help you sleep better but in my opinion it's best (and safer) to get potassium from food

 

there's a lot of good food sources, here's just one short list:

 

https://www.healthline.com/nutrition/foods-loaded-with-potassium#section6

 

 

[RM123]

On 2/13/2020 at 2:43 AM, Happy2Heal said:

since too much or too little potassium can have serious consequences, I'd not take any supplements 

 

there is some research that hints that potassium may help you sleep better but in my opinion it's best (and safer) to get potassium from food

 

there's a lot of good food sources, here's just one short list:

 

https://www.healthline.com/nutrition/foods-loaded-with-potassium#section6

 

 

Thank you for always replying. I’ve decided against potassium supplements for now 

[RM123]

Hi all just a quick one. 
 

My sleeping has not improved. I’ve noticed I’ve been getting very sleepy now around 7pm and will doze on the sofa on and off and not be able to sleep afterwards. I’m trying to break this habit. 
 

When I do sleep properly without dozing off I’m only getting 2-3hrs still. When will this end?

 

Im on mirtzapine 7.5mg. I have 15mg tablets. 
mom breaking them in half but they don’t ever seem to be even. I’ve tied a pill cutter with the same effect and I don’t have a access to a scale. The ones I looked at and bought are not very accurate and don’t measure my well. 
 

IS THIS A PROBLEM BECAUSE MY DOSE IS INCONSISTENT? 

 

Would it be easier to updose to 15mg so I’m getting the right amount? 
 

I really hate this. Life has been so difficult since this happened. I don’t feel myself anymore. I wish it never happened. 

[Deano32]

Hi rm23 i dry cut mirtazipine and i use a gemini 20 scale bought on amazon.com which is accurate to the mg perhaps you should look into one of them as they are a good and reasonably priced

 

Kind regards 

 

Deano

[Gridley]

1 minute ago, RM123 said:

 

IS THIS A PROBLEM BECAUSE MY DOSE IS INCONSISTENT? 

 

Would it be easier to updose to 15mg so I’m getting the right amount? 

 

An updose from 7.5 to 15 is a huge increase and could overwhelm your system and destabilize you.   I strongly advise against it.

 

A consistent accurate dose is very important.

 

Many members, myself included, use the AWS Gemini-20 scale available on Amazon in the U.K.  While it's not accurate at the very tiny doses, it's definitely accurate at your dosage and well below your dosage.  

 

The GEMINI-20 Scale

 

Using a digital scale to measure doses

 

 

 

 

 

 

[RM123]

@Deano32 and @Gridley

 

Thanks for your reply. Looks like the Gemini has to come from the states to the UK. May take a while. 
 

Also since I split the tabs, one half is gonna end up wasted and the Dr and pharmacist will be wondering why I keep asking for more prescriptions. That’s what’s I’m concerned about. 
 

Also let’s just say I have a half a tab at 8 mg. I could spend hrs just shaving off the extra .5mg accurately and constantly weighing it on the scale. And then boom I took word to much and now it’s 7.1mg. 
 

How do you possibly shave off tabs accurately 

[nipsu]

1 hour ago, RM123 said:

@Deano32 and @Gridley

 

Thanks for your reply. Looks like the Gemini has to come from the states to the UK. May take a while. 
 

Also since I split the tabs, one half is gonna end up wasted and the Dr and pharmacist will be wondering why I keep asking for more prescriptions. That’s what’s I’m concerned about. 
 

Also let’s just say I have a half a tab at 8 mg. I could spend hrs just shaving off the extra .5mg accurately and constantly weighing it on the scale. And then boom I took word to much and now it’s 7.1mg. 
 

How do you possibly shave off tabs accurately 

I am also withdrawing from mirtazapine after 1 year of using it for insomnia. The easiest way to get precise amount of mirtazapine is to dilute it to water. For example if you have 15 mg tablets you can dilute it to 10 ml water (i dilute to 20 ml). After diluting 15 mg mirtazapine to 10 ml water you have solution which has mirtazapine concertration of 1.5 mg/ml. 

 

I dilute whole tablet of mirtazapine to 20 ml boiling water. And i don't have to crush it because it dissolves quite well in hot water. But with this method you have to put 20 ml hot water and mirtazapine to small bottle (50ml-100ml) and shake it vigorously. After the solution has cooled down put it to refrigerator. You have to shake this solution everyday before getting your dose.

 

Mirtazapine melting point is 114 to 116 °C. So it shouldn't break down and lose its efficacy when you dilute it to boiling water. Mirtazapine has only  slight solubility in water and thats why it won't perfectly dissolve in water. Using hot water makes mirtazapine to dissolve alot faster in water and solubility will be better. When you put this solution to refrigerator you can notice next day that there is on the bottom of bottle white powder. This is the reason you have to shake it well before taking dose.

 

This method is cheap, easy and quick. It takes probably 2 minutes and you don't lose any of your precious medicine (kidding).

 

I wish you all the best RM123. 

 

[Gridley]

21 minutes ago, RM123 said:

@Deano32 and @Gridley

 

Thanks for your reply. Looks like the Gemini has to come from the states to the UK. May take a while. 
 

Also since I split the tabs, one half is gonna end up wasted and the Dr and pharmacist will be wondering why I keep asking for more prescriptions. That’s what’s I’m concerned about. 
 

Also let’s just say I have a half a tab at 8 mg. I could spend hrs just shaving off the extra .5mg accurately and constantly weighing it on the scale. And then boom I took word to much and now it’s 7.1mg. 
 

How do you possibly shave off tabs accurately 

 

Here's how you do it.  There's no shaving involved and no waste.  First you weigh ten tablets of the 15mg pill to get an average.   Let's say the average is 150mg.  That's what you'll be using as your pill weight; no need to keep weighing while pills but that once.

 

So you want half of 150mg, 75mg.  Crush the tablet between two spoons and put powder onto the scale using the tweezers or little spoon that comes with the scale put powder onto the scale, adding or subtracting,  until you get a weight of powder of 75mg.  If I'm a little off it doesn't matter because most of what you're weighing is filler (generally there's about a 10:1 ratio of filler to active ingredient).  Using a bent post-it pour the 75mg dose into a 00 gelatin capsule.

 

You save the rest of the powder in a pill bottle for the next dose. There's no waste.

 

 It takes me 10 to 20 minutes to make a week's worth of pills.  I was slower when I started, but you get the hang of it very quickly..

[RM123]

On 2/27/2020 at 8:39 PM, Gridley said:

 

Here's how you do it.  There's no shaving involved and no waste.  First you weigh ten tablets of the 15mg pill to get an average.   Let's say the average is 150mg.  That's what you'll be using as your pill weight; no need to keep weighing while pills but that once.

 

So you want half of 150mg, 75mg.  Crush the tablet between two spoons and put powder onto the scale using the tweezers or little spoon that comes with the scale put powder onto the scale, adding or subtracting,  until you get a weight of powder of 75mg.  If I'm a little off it doesn't matter because most of what you're weighing is filler (generally there's about a 10:1 ratio of filler to active ingredient).  Using a bent post-it pour the 75mg dose into a 00 gelatin capsule.

 

You save the rest of the powder in a pill bottle for the next dose. There's no waste.

 

 It takes me 10 to 20 minutes to make a week's worth of pills.  I was slower when I started, but you get the hang of it very quickly..

Hi thanks for this. I’m not sure I quite understand. So why do I weight first of 10 tablets of 15mg to get 150mg? What’s a pill weight? 
 

Then your saying If I want 75mg to crush up pills and make 75mg?  Then put powered on scale to get 75mg?

 

Can I not just crush up 10 pills of 15mg and just put the powder on the scale to make 7.5mg capsules from that? 
 

Also if most of it is filler how do you know your actually getting the medication when you add the powered to a capsule. I mean could you be getting all filler in one Capsule and then more medication in the next?