emerik: SSRIs error, withdrawal and back on it!

[Melissa03]

This gives hope. How long till you stabilized ?

[emerik]

@Melissa03 i think its still too soon to say if im 100 % stabilized, but ive been feeling pretty normal, how i was 1 year ago lets say, since at least 3 weeks.
took me 3 months, with lot of up and downs to be back where i was when i was on citalopram 20mg 2 years ago.

basically i feel as i felt when i was on a stable dose before.

[Melissa03]

When did you noticed you insomnia improved ? I am 2,5 weeks into reinstatement after 3 months without drug . 

[emerik]

@Melissa03 my insomnia was causin by extreme anxiety, and then i got into a loop fear of not sleeping and i was paranoid. it went on and off, i would sleep some days then other days not sleep. it was 2 months for me of bad nights lol, i would get the random nice week of sleep. i can still have bad day of sleep but i dont freak out about it now.

[emerik]

Hey guys 

i was here before about 4 years ago.

i started taking citalopram 20mg in 2017 for anxiety/ocd.

 

i took it for about 4 years. Everything was smooth saling And then i did the mistake of quitting cold turkey. I didnt do any research and forgot my gp advice which were minimal.

 

3 months after the cold turkey.

Severe insomnia, anxiety attack, oct, you name it. I think a lot of my symptoms were mostly from the insomnia. 
 

i went back on reinstated the citalopram and was back to my normal
self after a couple of hard months. Sleeping back 100% all days all nights

 

felt good for 4 years ! Im a young artist, during those years i smoke a lot of weed, drink a bunch, never had any issues. Never change my dosage.

 

3 days ago my big german shepherd had to wear the cone and was not having it, warm night, no ac , was turning around all night. Decide to smoke a joint around 2am, a very high energy joint by mistake. Got me hyper all night and didnt sleep.

 

next night i slept good! Was a bit worried about not sleeping but it was fine!

 

then i left for a work trip by car( im a tattoo artist , 6 hours drive, 6 clients a day for 3 days ), was sleeping at a friend on the floor, didnt sleep the first night, maybe 2 hours? Had to work all day the next day.

 

next day, decide to smoke some weed before bed , some couch potato one, got me sleepy but no sleeping still!

 

i always did smoke weed before bed in those past 4 years and i never had any problem. 
 

anyway now what im wondering! 
whats going on? They sound like wd symptoms i had before when i went cold turkey.

 

i believe my anxiety toward insomnia is going into a vicious circle and got triggered by some of that heavy weed and first bad nights sleep that reminded me of my old wd days?

 

im staying clear of anything for now and for long ( thinking of going 'straight edge' )  but im hoping my nervous system clear of the weed thc and heal ?

 

My anxiety is trough the roof all day all night lately, stomach hurting. All of this came 3 days ago, everything was good time before.

 

Hoping to get some thoughts on this strange experience.

[Emonda]

Welcome back @emerik,

I've just merged your new post back to your original introduction page. It's best to keep everything relating to yourself in one spot, so we can all follow your history and be better able to provide some guidance.

 

I'm sorry to hear you've had a rough time of late. I imagine alcohol, weed, and minimal sleep have destabilised you and left you feeling the way you are.

 

22 hours ago, emerik said:

im staying clear of anything for now and for long ( thinking of going 'straight edge' )  but im hoping my nervous system clear of the weed thc and heal ?

 

Good to hear. I suspect you will need to be patient and let your body recover. 

 

May I ask is your drug signature up-to-date? Are you still taking Citalopram?

 

Whilst you are waiting for your body to settle down, you might like to read about these non-drug coping strategies. 

 

Emonda

 

[emerik]

On 9/10/2023 at 7:19 PM, Emonda said:

 

Welcome back @emerik,

I've just merged your new post back to your original introduction page. It's best to keep everything relating to yourself in one spot, so we can all follow your history and be better able to provide some guidance.

 

I'm sorry to hear you've had a rough time of late. I imagine alcohol, weed, and minimal sleep have destabilised you and left you feeling the way you are.

 

 

Good to hear. I suspect you will need to be patient and let your body recover. 

 

May I ask is your drug signature up-to-date? Are you still taking Citalopram?

 

Whilst you are waiting for your body to settle down, you might like to read about these non-drug coping strategies. 

 

Emonda

 

 

just updated, im still on citalopram 20mg. it was good for 3 years again
the past week has been rough, most days 2-3 hours of sleep sometime 1 or none. it honestly feel the same as when i cold turkey celexa back then.

i have a great living situation, married, 3 animals, my own boss, no money problem. no stress factors per say.

anxiety is back all day all night, feeling a bit hyper sensitive. prob du to insomnia.

im thinking its time to taper the celexa? as i believe all my problems are linked to that. 
 

[Emonda]

Thanks for updating your signature, @emerik.

 

In the past, when I've taken various ADs, I've found they worked fine for some years, but then they seemed to be less effective. I'd increase the dose; things would be okay for a while, and then I'd need to increase it again. I read BrassMonkey refer to this as "poopout". Perhaps there is a little of this for you.

 

However, for me, when my sleep is bad, so is my mood and anxiety. You mention below that your sleep has not been good recently, and I wonder if this may be the immediate driver for how you're feeling right now.

 

9 hours ago, emerik said:

the past week has been rough, most days 2-3 hours of sleep sometime 1 or none

 

Six months ago, I had to completely cut out alcohol as I noticed that each time I drank just one beer or glass of wine, my sleep would be impacted, and I'd be riddled with anxiety the next day. Up until this time, I was absolutely fine with alcohol.

 

If you reflect on your own situation, you mentioned you were drinking alcohol and smoking cannabis...and then it seems to have caught up with you, much the same as a single beer/wine for me.

 

On 9/10/2023 at 11:09 AM, emerik said:

i always did smoke weed before bed in those past 4 years and i never had any problem. 

 

On 9/10/2023 at 11:09 AM, emerik said:

im staying clear of anything for now and for long ( thinking of going 'straight edge' )  but im hoping my nervous system clear of the weed thc and heal ?

 

It's great that you are avoiding these things now, but you will need to be patient for stability to return.

 

Have a read of these tips on sleep

 

Once your sleep improves and you feel more settled, then you could consider slowly tapering the AD. 

 

Please remember that the recommendation is to taper by a maximum of 10% per month of the most recent dose. The amount of the reduction gets smaller and smaller every month. I'd suggest you start by reading Why taper by 10% of my dosage?

 

Let us know how you are going.

 

Emonda